Voicemail and Cigarettes
The one bedroom apartment I shared with my fiance, Wade, over looked the beautiful San Diego ocean. It had a very large living room that held memories of the time spent in them. The old stains from split wine, coke, and who knows what else were almost invisible to us know. The smell of cigarettes perfumed the room and stained the walls no matter how hard we cleaned. The kitchen was always messy from the many homemade meals. It wasn't the best place in the world, I'll give it that but it was the home I had built with Wade over the past 3 years.
I moved to California only 5 short years ago. I started working for a tattoo parlor called the Crooked Moon. The shop was a nice size with about 7 artist. I remember the day Wade first walked into the shop.
It was only a few months after moving I meet him.
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"Hey, I was, uh," I looked up to a guy not much older than me with his eyes averted to the ground, "wonder if you could," his hands ran through his chestnut hair, "fit me in for a session today?"
I smiled and looked at my scheduled, "Your in luck. I had two cancels back-to-back." I stood up from my work station, "Names Quinn. So what can I do for you today, Mr?" I extended my hand.
"Names Wade," His soft ocean green eyes meet mine and I could feel butterflies form in my stomach, "I was wanting to get something on my left hand."
Once the tattoo gun started up, Wade seemed more comfortable and just keep on talking. We talked about our tattoos and which ones meant the most to us and why. We talked for what felt like a life time. Before I knew it Wade had convinced me to see his band play at a local bar after work. After that I couldn't stay away from him.
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I rolled over onto my back, blocking the sun light from my eyes. I could hear the sink cut off; then Wade appeared in the door way. He stood there looking at me in his ugly banana boxers.
We held eye contact for only a second before he moved towards the bed, "Good morning," His smooth, husky voice the only sound in the room.
I smiled, "Good morning."
He moved towards the dresser and began pulling out clothes, "I have an early practice and I'm staying late after work."
I stood up and let my feet touch the icy hard wood floors, "What time is it?" I wiping sleep from my eyes.
"It's 8." He pulled his black jeans on, "I have to go or I'm gonna be late." He pulled his shirt on.
"Alright." I walked over and put my hand against his face, "I love you."
His lips meet mine but only for a brief second, "You, too." As Wade left the room, I made my way to the bathroom.
The steaming water sprayed onto my cold, sheepish body. I felt myself waking up the longer I stayed in. The warmth of the shower was engulfing. I didn't want to leave. I didn't want to leave this warmth but alas I had too.
I wrapped a town around my body as I did my makeup. I found a pair of underwear and black skinny jeans and slipped them on. I searched through the closet for a suitable shirt till I came about a hot pink spaghetti strap shirt. I added a pair of plugs and a watch.
I checked the time. 9. I guess I better go so I can grab breakfast and head to work. I slipped my shoes on at the door and grabbed my purse and keys.
When I got to the shop, I set my things in my locker. "Damn Quinn, back at it again with those white vans!" I felt someone pat my back. I turned around to see Ashley.
"Fuck you." I said flipping her off as I made my way to the counter, "Why are you here so earlier? I've never seen you here before noon." I went into the computer system and looked to see who I had scheduled to tattoo first.
"I had a friend call me last night said one of her friends really wanted me to tattoo them. I think she was drunk but not gonna pass up the opportunity to make a little cash." She smiled and slipped on a cup of coffee leaving little red lipstick stains on the cup.
"Well I don't have anyone to tattoo until 12 so unless a walk-in happens I'm gonna just set around and watch you tat." I moved some papers around trying to keep busy so I was just setting around.
"No, problem but," I looked up at her and she was pointing outside. I knew exactly what she was talking about.
The door opened a small bell jingled above, "Hey, a friend of mine told me about this place. I'm looking for an Ashley." A guy with a round baby face said to us.
"That would be me." Ashley walked around the counter and shook his hand.
"My name is Tony. This here is an old friend of mine Vic." Tony motioned towards the skinnier guy with long brown hair.
"It's good to meet you both. This is Quinn." Ashley motioned towards me and I half assed waved. I never got comfortable around clients until the buzzing of the gun started.
Within minutes Ashley was drawing up Tony's new tattoo, leaving Vic and I in the front lobby. Vic was rather quite looking through the many tattoos we had hanging on the wall, "Find something you like?" I leaned against the counter top.
"Oh no. Tattoos aren't for me." Vic walked over to the counter wanting to engage in conversation.
"You must be afraid of needles." I brushed a stray piece of hair behind my head.
"You know it." He smiled. His smile was cute and friendly just like the vibe I was getting off of him.
"So how'd Tony find out about this place again?" I sipped on an ice frappe I had bought from McDonald's earlier.
"He has this girl he started hanging out with and she has had all her work done here."
I knew who he was talking about right away, "Oh Alena! Yeah she's Ashley's regular. We are suppose to be getting drinks with her tonight."
Vic opened his mouth to say something but my phone rang, "Excuse me."
I put a cigarette in my mouth as I stepped outside, "Hello?" I asked as I lite the tiny killer between my lips.
"Hey," I heard Aaron's deep voice on the other end, "is Ashley at work? She wasn't here when I woke up."
I laughed slightly, "Yeah she's here. When did you get up?" I let the deadly smoke fill my lungs. The smoke slowly turning into the black tar.
"I just got up like 10 minutes ago." He yawned, "Today is my off day."
I thought for a second as I processed what Wade told me this morning, "Wade said you guys had band practice this morning. Did you skip?"
"I didn't hear anything about practice. I hope I didn't miss something." His voice trailed off a little bit. He was quite for a few seconds as I stomped my cigarette out, "Well, I gotta go. If we did have band practice I need to call Wade."
When I came back in Tony was already at the counter, "That happened fast."
"Well," Vic said pushing his hair out of his face, "we have to be at the studio soon. So Tony just got the outline."
I sat my phone behind the counter, "Let me see."
Tony removed the covering to reveal the outline of a cartoon like turtle, "I can't wait to see it when it's colored." He put the covering back on, "So, Ashley, when can I come back?"
Ashley made a few clicks on the computer, "Let me see," she scrolled down the screen, "how about 3 weeks from today?"
"That works perfect." Tony took out his phone, "Let me get both of your numbers. I think we are having a party tomorrow and I wanna let people meet the awesome tattoo artist here!" Tony laughed, "Plus Alena is gonna be there." He smiled lightly.
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As I pulled in the drive way, I noticed Wade wasn't home. It was dark outside and I'd be headed to the bar soon. I parked my car and got out.
I heard my phone go off as I grabbed clothes for the night. I grabbed my phone off the bed and saw it was a text from.
Sorry not coming home tonight. Practicing at Aaron's and got drunk. No ride home. See you tomorrow my love.
Lately his band practice has been causing him not to be home very much, but it didn't bother me. I trusted him completely and knew they were all working to get signed to a label.
I got dressed rather quickly. I slipped into a black mid-thigh skirt, a spaghetti strapped crop top, and some heels. I did my makeup a little darker and applied my favorite choker. I headed to the bar.
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"So, why didn't you tell us you were talking to such a cutie?" Ashley asked Alena.
Alena's long curly dark brown hair was pulled up in pony tail, "I didn't think it was gonna be something worth tell you about. I've only hung out with him once and Vic was there with his girlfriend." Alena took a shot of vodka
I felt my stomach turn at the smell of it, "Fuck, Alena. I thought we talked about Vodka and me." I fanned the air with my hand.
"Not my fault you drank almost 2/5 in a night." Her eyebrows moved up and down as a smile crossed her face.
"So how are things with you and Wade?" Ashley asked looking up at the TV screen.
"Things are good, I guess. He spends a lot of time at band practice here lately. He's at Aaron's now. But -"
Ashley slammed her shot glass on the table, "Aaron's on his way here."
I was a little confused but didn't have time to answer as my phone started ringing, "It's Wade. Wanna go outside with me while I smoke?"
"Fuck! It went to voicemail." I tapped away at my phone calling my voicemail.
"It happens." Alena lite us all three cigarettes at once.
"You are the best." Ashley said taking one and handing the other one to me.
I placed the phone to my ear.
"Are you sure she isn't gonna find out?" I heard a girl faintly say.
"No. She won't." I could hear Wade say back.
Within seconds I heard moans and screams. I hung up and took a long hard drag off my cigarette.
Jack and Coke
"Whoa. Someone is in hot shit." Alena said peiring over at me.
I sat there for a few seconds trying to understand what just happened.
"Are you okay, doll?" Ashley said rubbing her hands against my arms.
"Yeah, I'm fine." I smiled to hide the anger and pain I felt inside.
I walked past their raised eyebrows and slightly opened mouths and back to the bar, "3 shots of Jack please." I smiled at the bar tender as he put my order on our tab.
I felt a hand touch my back, "Are you sure you okay?" Alena's black nails were at her lips.
"I'm fine. Really, I am. I just wanna have some fun tonight and I'll explain everything tomorrow." The bartender sat the three shots down and I quickly took all three.
An hour and few shots later, I was feeling better. I had found a comfortable spot in a booth not far the dance floor where I could watch Alena and Ashley dance with Aaron. It had been a long time since I had gone out with the girls. But Aaron has been in my life just as long as Alena and Ashley and I guess I considered him one of the girls.
I felt the table move and I looked away from the swaying bodies in the crowed over to the long haired tattoo guy who sat in front of me. I put my hand on my glass and smiled.
"Pardon me for the intrusion but," his voice was soft and smooth, "I couldn't help but notice you setting here by yourself." The words seem to flow of his tounge.
I giggle softly, "I came with friends but they're out dancing." I sipped on Jack and Coke.
"Well," He stood up and extended his hand, "want to join me?" He flashed a toothy smile. My cold hands felt the warmth of his.
We slowly made our way through the dance floor, through the crowds of people like waves on a vast ocean. Everyone's bodies touched, like a silent dance of a mosh pit. I didn't notice how much he townered over me until he turned around to face me.
"I'm Mike by the way." His warm breath against my ear made my blood flourish.
"Quinn." I looked up into his dark chestnut eyes.
He placed his hands on my hips and we swayed to the music. We keep our eyes locked onto each other. Within minutes we were extremely close to each other.
He leaned down to me, "Wanna get a few shots?"
I could feel the warm fuzzies through out my body but noddied.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell the liquor and cigarettes on his breath. At least we were one in the same tonight. He grabbed my hand and pulled me through the crowd. I looked around and saw Alena looking over at us from the booth. She smiled and waved.
"Two shots of Jack please?" He looked over at me "You cool with that?" I nodded again.
Four shots later, I was pinned against the building wall making out with Mike. The kiss was sloppy but hot and with every touch I wanted more. I felt the scruff of his face leave from mine.
"Wanna get out of here?" Mike motioned towards a taxi.
"Yeah, let's go." He grabbed my hand pulled me towards a taxi he waved down.
When we go into the taxi, Mike told him the address and quickly pulled my into his lap. I felt his hand stroke my thigh and his lips meet mine. I ran my fingers through his soft brown hair. I could feel the heat of his touch radate through out my body.
The more he kissed down my neck the more I got lost in the moment. I knew it was to get my mind off Wade but I could still enjoy it right? If I was going to have sex with this guy I was going to have fun with it.
The cab drivier tapped on the glass seperating us. We came up for air and I found myself in front of a rather lavishing house. Mike quickly paid then man and got out, helping me out as well. He turned the key and the door opened.
As Mike began to go in for a kiss, I shoved him against a small table that stood by the door. We ignored the sound of lamp shatter. I started kissing all the way down his jaw line. Mike let out a loud groan as I began to harshly bite and kiss his neck. I tugged on his shirt, letting him know to take it off. As he was taking his shirt off, I slowly made my down his stomach. I kissed and bite lightly at his skin until I was at his pants.
I got down on my knees and proceeded to unbutton his pants . I tugged his boxers down and once they were finally off, his member sprang free. It took me a moment to actually take in how big he was. I felt myself start to get wet at the sight. I let out a moan at the effect Mike had on me. I took him in my mouth in one shot. I sucked on him. He seemed to like it because he would let out groans.
"Holy fuck." Mike groaned as my teeth scrapped against him as I went up and down, "More teeth." I did as he demanded. Within minutes I could feel Mike about to come. Before I could move my head Mike had with drawn himself from me.
I felt his hand wrap around my throat as he brough my face to match his, "You are a tease." The smirk on his face made my legs quiver. I gulped. I wanted him inside me but I knew he wouldn't do it right now.
Mike stepped out of his boxers and picked me up to where I was straddling him. We stumbled into many tables, walls, and pictures knocking and breaking things as took us to his bedroom.
He through me onto his bed and I reached to pull my undearwear off. Mike pinned my hands against the bed, "No." The look in Mike's eyes were hungry and demanding. I was scared but so turned on at the same time. Before I could say anything, Mike removed my underwear letting go of my hands. I felt a soft little blow against my clit. I gasped through my teeth and grabbed a hold of the sheets.
"Someone is wet." Mike kissed above my clit but I couldn't wait. I bucked my hips and my clit was meet with the icey metal of his lip ring. I let a soft moan release from inside me as my hands tangled through Mike's hair.
As he began licking my clit, I couldn't help but want more. My breathing became fast and ragged. I pulled on his hair and let out a groan. His tounge was moving faster than imaginable. I wanted to scream.
Just as I was about to beg him to finger me, he rammed two of his long fingers into me. I threw my head back in ecstacy. I let go of Mike's hair and began to message my nipples. I knew I'd come any moment.
Mike stood up. I was far from finished and I wanted more. He stepped over to the nightstand and pulled out a condom. He slipped it on and quickly hurried back. Mike positioned himself on top of me kissing my colorbone. He left little bite marks up my neck and to my ear.
"Please just fuck me already." I wimpered into his ear. I could feel Mike smirk against my ear. Before I could do anything, rammed his member completely inside me. I screamed throwing my head back.
"You are so tight." He wispered into my ear. Mike rammed into again, twice as hard as before. I bit my lip and gripped the sheets. I couldn't hold my own leg up so Mike pulled one up for support. This was the best sex I had ever had.
I flipped us over so that I was on top. His hands found my ass and my hands laid on his chest. He squeezed my ass and started moving me up and down. I straightened my back out and continued to bounce up and down. Mike layed there. His mouth was agated and his breathing ragged. His hands searched for something to hold onto.
“Oh. Fuck. Me!” He cried out. I grabbed a hold of his wondering hands and placed them on my boobs. He immediately squeezed them. The harder I would bounce on him, the harder he would squeeze my tits. “Oh god! Please, Don’t stop!”
“I am about to cum!” Mike yelled out. Just as he notified me I felt his dick begin to twitch within me. I did not stop bouncing on Mike. I wanted him to want me after I left so I began bouncing and grinding even harder than before. Just as he ended I began to feel myself climax as well. I let out a loud scream and let my body convulse.
Mike sat up as I rolled off of him. Our bodies stunk with the smell of sweat and sex. I just wanted to sleep. I just wanted to leave. But I also wanted to fuck Mike again.
Mike layed down on one side of his bed and I layed on the other. We didn't cuddle or lay close. Within minutes I heard the soft snores of Mike. The second those sounds lasted for a little while I gathered up my things and left.
Run Little Bird
The key seemed to echo thru out the house. I stepped in, my bare feet touching the cold floor. I made my way to the bedroom hoping and praying Wade wouldn't be there.
Sadly, he was.
"Hey," Wade smiled up from his sheet music, "How was the night out with the girls?"
I felt my body temperature rise as my stomach dropped. How dare he smile at me? How dare he act like he wasn't fucking some girl!? WHO THE HELL DOES HE THINK HE IS!?
I laughed. I tried everything to stop but it felt like I laughed forever before the words slipped out, "I got a voicemail from you tonight."
Wade's smile dropped for a second, "What voicemail?"
I pulled out my phone and dialed my voicemail. I let the moans fill the empty room. My eyes stayed locked onto Wade.
"I.. That's not.." he stumbled to find the words.
Before he could continue I raised my hand, "It's fine." I walked over to the closet and grabbed a suit case, "I don't know who she is or what she is to you but I know what I am and what I am worth." I could feel the tears burning my eyes but I refused to cry in front of him.
Wade never moved or said anything as I packed away my things. The silence of the room felt sickening. I wanted to puke but I honestly didn't know if it was because of the liquor or Wade. I put the last few things that I wanted into my suit case and zipped it up. The zipper sounded like it had been hooked up to a surround sound speaker.
As I pulled my suitcase to the door, Wade grabbed my arm, "I'm sorry... I'm sorry for wasting your time." His voice didn't show guilt but instead it expressed thankfulness. He was happy I was the one leaving because he didn't have the balls to be the one to leave.
I wanted to hit him, slap him, plan out hurt him, but I didn't. I shook my head laughing and closed the door behind me. I got into my car and pulled out of the drive way, hoping to never see this place again.
I don't remember how I ended up at the beach. My mind was on autopilot and I didn't seem to care.
The sand wedged itself between my toes, as I made my way towards the water. I pulled my cigarettes out and placed it between my lips as my toes touched the warm pacific ocean water. I searched my bag for a lighter but didn't find one.
I signed and breathed in the thick salty ocean air. I walked for what felt like eternity letting the waves wash against my feet. The longer I walked the more that seemed to cloud my mind.
What's wrong with me? What about me made me unless to him? How was he able to just let me go so easily? He didn't try to stop me. Did he ever really love me? Was I just a tool for him to use? What happened to us? I thought we were perfect together. Why? Why Wade? Why?
I felt the warmth of tears rolling down my face before my mind ventured back to reality. I saw only the ocean gleaming from the city lights. I wanted to dive in and get lost under the current. I wanted to be dragged out to sea and become one with the ocean.
Why? Why did I feel so alone? I had people I could turn too but I didn't want too.
I laid down with my legs bent so my feet could touch the water. My arm laid across my face. The tears kept flowing, never stopping.
"Hey," I felt someone tap my shoulder, "are you okay?"
I blinked to straighten my vision. How long was I asleep? I looked over to see a long lanky tattooed arms layed across folded arms. His light coffe colored hair blowing softly with the wind at the ends of his beanie.
"Are you good?" He asked again looking me directly in my face.
I sat up as my face flurshed from the incounter with him last night, "I'm fine." I extended my hand, "I'm Quinn." Maybe he won't remember me.
"Oh, I see how it is." He pretended to cover his face and cry, "You don't remember me."
I laughed for a second, "I'm sorry. I've just never had someone stumble apon me like this." I ran my fingers through my hair shaking lose sand out.
I looked over at the horizan as we both sat there in silence. The sun was rising and the once dark black sky I fell asleep to was turning a soft orange pink.
"It's pretty cool huh?" Mike said as he let sand fall between his fingers.
I nodded in agreement.
"I come here around this time ever so often. Who would have thought I'd find such a cute girl asleep here." He grinned.
"Whatever." I mubbled under my breath as my eyes stayed on the sunrise.
"Why are you out here? Got drunk and passed out? Or maybe while I was asleep I told you about this place and you wanted to come here and see me, again?"
"You wish." I couldn't tell him the truth. I couldn't tell him I was homeless or that I had just left my boyfriend a few hours ago. "I came here to clear my head."
"Mmmm." Mike nodded, "Must have been a lot for you to clear. Your eyes are puffy like you've been crying. Was sleeping with me that bad?" He pretended to cry again.
I rolled my eyes, "You know it."
His jaw dropped as he looked at me in astonishment, "How could you say that!?" He stood up and stormed off.
I got to my feet and called after him, "Are you really gonna walk off because of a joke?"
"Maybe I just want you to follow me?" He walked towards the edge of the water and leaned down sticking his hands into the sea.
"What are you doing?" I asked.
I couldn't tell if it was the ocean water or his hands that warmed my cheeks as he wiped away makeup, "There." He said drying his hands on his shirt, "Now, you won't scare away any more beach goers." He laughed and took off running down the shoarline.
My feet wouldn't listen to me telling them to stay put. Instead they took off following him. The water splashed against my legs with every step I slammed into the ground. I felt the soft wet sand mold around my feet with each step.
"Come on!" Mike yelled back at me, "Run little bird!"
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Tag der Veröffentlichung: 19.05.2016
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