BookRix

I like the concept of the story as I liked the film Avatar. It has promise! But would be a better read if better formatted with separation of paragraphs? Indenting would also help in the flow of reading, Just my Thoughts but if you want to be taken seriously as a writer think seriously about prevention?

I happened to like it. Keep up the great work

) This anal fixation fetish Sci-Fi novel is a bit much for this reader but I persevered and read it in full. The science fiction end of it was complex and well thought out so I enjoyed that quite a bit. However, even though I write eroticism myself, I found the repeated detailed sex play to be more than I could stomach and skimmed over much of it by mid novel. There is also a need to edit for spelling, English usage and general errors in sentence structure, etc.

I would try to tame it down a bit if you wish to have it reach a wider readership but if you intend it for the narrow nitch of fetish readers, by all means leave it as is but please do edit for English usage. I would suggest a warning clause up front to ward off those who are seeking science fiction only. Just a thought. Good luck with your efforts in writing.

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