BookRix

its really good

hmm how do i improve it(the proofread)?
Oh and thank you for giving your feedback again :)
It has been in my mind to make a sequel of this.Should I?
The sequel would be something like this: Set in the year at the ending. A new main character: a youthful and good-looking male Reaper lets a criminal escape. His mistake would cost him than he had ever intended. The criminal sets out to kill a girl (the only survivor of his massacre) and that girl is the boy's first true love. They meet and unknown to them, they are connected by a blood-thirsty killer...

This story has much more substance than the others that you have written so far. You delved into the thoughts of your characters in more detail and I think it helped. The anti-hero character having to admit his love was a taste of a good literary mechanism. Also good was the use of a character very close her who could hurt "Locket" in a very personal way.

Now the bad; this reeked of High School girl. If it had not been for those mechanisms you used, it would have been a very trite and unimaginative story. A few inconsistencies were prevalent, and my opinion of your writing conventions remains the same. Proofreading is important.

thanks for the hearts!!!!! :)
i really appreciate it :D