eBooks „is“
Es wurden 36515 eBooks für den Suchbegriff „is“ gefunden.
Kristjan Knall
Hassfick
Pick-Up Artists, Tinder, Liebe und Hass.
- Satire
- Deutsch
- 40261 Wörter
- Ab 10 Jahren
- 610
Wir haben uns nicht groß verändert. Schicker neuer 7er vor der Grunewaldvilla, Einkommen wie ein afrikanischer Kleinstaat, weiß, männlich, im besten Zielgruppenalter. Du bist bereit zum Erobern. Töten. Leider ist das, zumindest in Europa, noch nicht wieder in. Auch die Zeiten von Keule auf den Kopf und an den Haaren in die Höhle ziehen sind vorbei – oder nicht?
Nein, nur nimmt man statt der Keule das Smartphone. In unserem werbetauglichen Leben fehlt das gewisse Etwas, das, das man nicht per SMS kaufen kann, das ein wenig mehr als extra große Fruchtstücke im Joghurt. Es fehlt die Befriedigung des uralten archaischen Dranges: Sex. Joggingtracker-App, atmungsaktive Spandexhose, Applebewegungsprofile von denen die Stasi feucht träumen würde – wir sind Cyborgs. Aber wir fühlen uns wie Urmenschen.
Tief in der grauen Masse, die uns vom elenden Tierreich abhebt, sitzt das Kleinhirn. Eine grantige, verwundene Einheit, die uns tausende Jahre gesagt hat wann wir rennen, fressen oder eben vögeln sollen. Jetzt ist sie arbeitslos und wirft mit ihren Impulsen Pilsatordosen von Innen gegens Großhirn. Da schallerts und schon rennen wir. Rennen wir in Urzeiten, Frauen, zur Not aber auch nur Ärschen oder Titten hinterher. Gib ihm noch ein wenig spätkapitalistische Frustration, Stress aus der vollen Ubahn, und eine Nase MDMA, und die Jagd beginnt.
„Pickup-Artists“ sind die Extremisten unter dem, was Hipster, Prolls, Yuppies und jeder, der sich vor der Schöpfung blamiert, abzieht. Ihr Schlachtplan ist so perfekt, wie zynisch. Sie sind im Krieg, sie können nicht ohne. Ein Paradies, das haben die Buddhisten schon richtig erkannt, wäre Bedürfnislosigkeit. Solange die nicht käuflich gemacht und schön in Häppchen verpackt ist, werden wir immer radikaler, immer widerlicher kämpfen. Liebe? Träum weiter. Wir nehmen alles, was übrig bleibt.
Wir wollen Hassficken.
"Warum also soll man sich mit einem weiteren dieser Autoren treffen? Zumal der Verlag auch nochselbst davor warnt.“
- Der Tagesspiegel, 19.3.2013.
„Fast durchgängige Meinung: Kristjan Knall hat einen Knall.“
- Berliner Kurier, 19.2.2013
„Vieles an Knalls Beschreibungen ist maßlos übertrieben und landet oft unter der Gürtelline.“
- Berliner Morgenpost, 24.3.16.
„Dass er in der Verkleidung wie eine jüngere Ausgabe von Helge Schneider wirkt, war ihm nicht bewusst, ist ihm aber recht.“
- Süddeutsche Zeitung, 28.11.14
„Im Online-Auftritt des Berliner Kuriers hinterlässt ein Leser am 18. Februar in der Kommentarspalte hinter dem Bericht über die Flaggenverbrennung folgende Nachricht: „Für den Vogel sollten wir Berliner sammeln, um ihm ein Ticket nach Russland zu spendieren, am besten dorthin, wo der Meteorit runtergekommen ist. Oder an die Elfenbeinküste, da kann er ja dann die Menschen weiter beleidigen. Mal sehen, was die dann mit ihm machen.“
- Cicero, 20.6.2013
Weiteres vom Meister des Abfucks:
Berlin zum Abkacken. Eulenspiegel, 2013111 Gründe Berlin zu hassen. Schwarzkopf, 2016
Stoppt die Klugscheißer!. Eulenspiegel, 2013
Europa ist geil, nur hier nicht. Eulenspiegel 2014
Edition Umsonst:
Fuck Berlin - A Not-Guide, 2022
Wir Lügner – wie Google uns uns entlarvt, Bookrix, 2017
Als Mehmet Yildiz: Neukölln, ein Frontbericht. Bookrix, 2017
IS-Idioten – was mal gesagt werden muss, Bookrix, 2017
Hassfick - Pick-Up Artists, Tinder, Liebe und Hass. Bookrix, 2016
Land ohne Eigenschaften - Eine Reise durch Dunkeldeutschland. Bookrix, 2016
Berliner Armee Fraktion - Der Kampf beginnt. Bookrix, 2016
Fuck Trump - Sind die Amis wirklich so bescheuert? Bookrix, 2015
Fake News – Zu schräg, um wahr zu sein?, Bookrix, 2015
Shitstorm - Der letzte Thriller. Bookrix, 2015
https://twitter.com/Kristjan_Knall
https://www.facebook.com/dakristjanknall/
dakristjanknall@gmx.net [mehr]
Stichwörter: sex, humor, satire, pick up, artist, gemein, jugend, tinder, okcupid, dating, ratgeber, parship, romantisch, liebe, internet, social media, lustig, absurd, extrem, ficken, religion, sekten, links, politik, 50 shades, harry potter, aggressiv, berlin [mehr]
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Isioma Jemimah Okonicha
1001 Stories Of Greatness, Series 2
- Belletristik
- Englisch
- 5944 Wörter
- Ab 16 Jahren
- 44
1001 stories of Greatness are short fictional stories about how to tap into your potential by first looking within you to discover your hidden advantage and strength. Discovering who you can become starts with first accepting to look inward. If you do not look inward, how do you know your genius?
These stories give pointers to how to live fulfilled and free lives. And they are not meant for a selected few, but rather everyone of any age who has become responsible for their decisions.
To those who have lost time doing nothing significant and staying unfulfilled, I'm glad to tell you that time lost can be regained as long as you do not quit!
And for those who are just starting out in life, it is important to let you know that every decision you make will determine whether you truly live or merely exist. So make decisions wisely.
1001 stories of greatness contain wisdom that you need on your journey, especially for the times when every road seems blocked. You can navigate your well as long as you have the right information and knowledge.
Chapter 1 begins:
As the sun began to set over the small town, the group of friends gathered around the table on the patio, ready to unwind after a long day. They had planned a laid-back evening, with good food and even better drinks to share.
The first round of drinks was a round of refreshing cocktails, made with crisp white rum, tangy lime juice, and a splash of sweet simple syrup. As they sipped on their drinks, the friends chatted and laughed, catching up on everything that had happened since they last saw each other.
Next, they decided to switch things up with a round of rich, smooth red wines. Each of them chose a different bottle, eager to try something new and share their favorites with the group. As they sipped and savored the complex flavors of the wine, the conversation turned to more serious topics, as they delved into discussions about their careers, relationships, and the future.
As the night went on, the group consisting of young boys and girls in their teens, decided to switch to something a little stronger. They brought out a selection of fine whiskies, from smooth, honeyed single malts to bold, peaty blends. They poured themselves generous glasses and sat back, sipping slowly as they talked and listened to music.
As the night began to wind down, the group decided to end their evening with a round of after-dinner drinks. They brought out a tray of cordials and liqueurs, including rich, creamy Kahlua, sharp, bittersweet Campari, and smooth, velvety Bailey's. They mixed and matched, creating unique, layered cocktails that perfectly capped off their evening.
As they finished their drinks and said their goodbyes, the friends all agreed that it had been a perfect evening, filled with good company, delicious food, and a wide variety of delicious drinks. They made plans to do it all again soon, already looking forward to their next gathering and the new drinks they would discover and share.
But among the group was Mira, silent and lost in her thoughts, she had always been a bright, curious child, full of energy and enthusiasm for life. But as she grew older, her life became increasingly troubled and abusive.
Her father was an alcoholic and a drug addict, who was prone to violent outbursts and abuse. He would lash out at Mira and her mother whenever he was in one of his drunken rages, leaving them both bruised and battered.
Mira's mother, exhausted and beaten down by years of abuse, was unable to protect her daughter from her father's wrath. She tried her best to shield Mira from the worst of it, but there was only so much she could do.
As a result, Mira grew up feeling scared, vulnerable, and alone. She struggled with low self-esteem and a deep sense of worthlessness, believing that she was somehow to blame for her father's behavior.
As she entered her teenage years, Mira began to act out, seeking attention and validation from anyone who would give it to her. She became rebellious and wild, getting into trouble at school and with the law.
Her mother, desperate to get her daughter back on track, sent her to live with her aunt and uncle in a small town on the other side of the country. Mira was resistant at first, but eventually came to see the move as an opportunity to start fresh and leave her troubled past behind.
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anil
Sex story-By lady neighbour-pussy thrust
lady neighbour
- Erotik
- Englisch
- 2 Wörter
- Ab 18 Jahren
- 558
- 24
By Lady neighbour- Pussy Thrust
I have from a long time being fascinated by bahbhis, they have a distinct way of dressing bright colors their ornaments and most importantly their figure. U know when they bend or put their saree aside u can see their boobs with poky nipples from the dark color blouse its different and all together they are always laughing and cheerful mood.
.I had a crush on one of my neighbor women her name was Sonal Navgire.
Sonal Navgire was 32 married and her husband was on the ship she also had a 4 year old kid and her figure was awesome she was tall had green eyes her stats were 33 c boobs I know that coz I had seen her bra and smelled it and seen the tag and she had a sexy waist. She was fair and smooth. The reason I was in a good term with her was coz I was damn friendly with her 4 years old son I used top take him out for stroll and play with him.
Let me come to the incident now it was month of July 09 it was raining heavily one day as I did not go to work I was getting bored so I decided to go to her house when I rang the door bell her maid opened the door she said Sonal wahini had gone to the Church she has done all the work but she needs to go to school to get her children so I called up Sonal and told her she requested me to wait till she comes and I was glad. I enquired about the kiss the maid he was fast asleep. so I put on the TV suddenly there was this lingerie add looking at the ad I got horny so I decided why don’t I search her wardrobe and smell her bar and panty or wear them.
So in excitement I started searching her wardrobe suddenly o came along a small drawer I found her bra and panties mann what color were those black purple red white blue she had various panties too the most sexy one was the thong later on my discovery I was shocked to find out what I saw I saw a big 9 inch black vibrator looking at it I went high as horny. I put on her bar and panties lay on the bed and started the vibrator it was great. I kept the vibrator below my balls and moved it in circles I stared licking it and then slowly I stuffed it in my ass I saw myself in mirror I was wearing her sexy purple padded bra and the thongs I also wore her green blouse.
After I mastuburated and kept all the things back just after 10 minutes Sonal entered the house she was totally wet her saree was dripping and u could see her cleavage and her nipples poking from her blouse I got an hard on immediately. I helped her to unload the goods she brought for dayly use while doing so I accidentally touch her boobs and pressed her nipples I knew she was feeling. I asked he to go and change or else she may catch cold she went inside but later on after 10 minutes she came she was furious I was caught coz ny accidentally I cumed in her bra and panties and forgot to wipe the sperms properly.
She scolded at me and was going to tell my parents I pleaded with her begged her she was in no mood I grabbed her by her arms and threw her on the sofa. I told her I had a big crush on her and knew she sexually frustrated too hearing this she started crying she told me it’s been 10 months since her husband is gone and she did not had sex till now. I went to close to her took her face in my hand and kissed her on her lips and then I whispered her I “tu gabru nako me aahi naa” and then slowly stated kissing her she co-operated with me then we stated kissing each other and slowly we were French kissing each other. My hands were on her boobs and her hands on my cock she could feel my heat Om my dick. I asked her what’s her fantasy she said she wanted someone to eat her pussy still she cam I agreed I wore her bra and panties and I went down on her pussy. Firstly I started licking her thighs then inner thighs up and down slowly and steadily then I went to her pussy gosh she was damn hairy I smelled her pubic area it was a strong musky smell. and then I lowered my tongue in her clit she was damn wet I started exploring her cunt with my tongue circled her pussy lips and then went directly for her clitoris then there was no stopping she was fucking my mouth and I was enjoying she was going up and down and faster and faster and then after 15 minutes she came with a big oooooooooohhhh and orgasm she was half dead and as shivering.
Now it was my turn she started to lick my penis from the soft fabric of the thongs I was wearing she licked and played with my penis my tool stated to grow and it was in its full glory of 9 inch monster was ready for her love hole. I went to her bedroom got the vibrator first I played on her pussy deeper I could see the pussy juices flowing and then she played it under my balls now I wanted to fuck her I spreaded her legs and kept it on my shoulder and then I went in straight into her love hole she was so wet and hot and I worked the vibrator on her ass I was double fucking her I fucked her deep and fast deep and fast every stroke was a different one and then after 25 minutes of banging I came all over her body I was drained put but she wasn’t she wanted her ass to be fucked too she again gave me a blow job licked my cock clean and I was ready it was my first anal sex. but she was an expert she got some lubricant from the fridge apply on her ass hole some on my cock and told me to enter her I entered her with big stroke I was in heaven she moaned and moaned and I fucked her in doggie style eagle style and then I blasted my second load in her ass.
Now she was satisfied and now onwards I’m her second husband we even had sex on the terrace in her car and also on the beach.. [mehr]
Stichwörter: sex story
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joann harris
FEAR OF THE BEAST
A DAY OF RECKONING
- Horror
- Englisch
- 291 Wörter
- Ab 18 Jahren
- 66
- 3
The town of Wheatfield no longer exists. Very little of the northeastern part of Fork County exists, except in the memories of those who may have once lived there and were fortunate enough to be gone when the great fireball struck, searing the land for miles. Scientists were stunned by the suddeness of the huge fireball, fir it seemed to materalized out of the heavens, traveling at such a tremendous speed, it was almost beyond calculation. "Where had it come from?" the scientists were asked by a stunned population. "From straight out of the sun," was the reply. "You could not have predicted it?"No.' Why?" The scientists hedged that question, for many of them were sworn avowed atheists. Finally, one man from an observatory in Washington who was not an unbeliever did reply, although not to the satisfaction of all of his colleagues. His reply brought laughter from more than a few of his fellow scientists.
How does one predict when the hand of God will fall, and how hard the blow will be? If indeed it had been as the scientists said, the hand of God, it had been a mighty slap from him. By the time various spies in the skies satellites, picked up on the cannoading mass of fiery destruction, it was already on top of the satellites, going through them, and burning them before they could be photographed, more than a one second shot at best, and transmit that to earth. Those pictures that did make it back to earth were immediately ordered to be seized by a presidential order.
Some said it was shaped like a Star of David. Others said it looked like an artist's conception of God's face; striking resemblance. The president told the scientists to shut their damn mouths, too, or faced the prospects of never receiving another dime of government money for anything. But many people witnessed the strange blue lights that preceded the crash of the whatever the hell it was, and they asked about those lights. But suddenly all were quiet about the mighty ball of fire, except for speculation. That soon began to fade as the news pushed the holocaust out of the headlines.
Only the insurance companies were left to ponder over the crash and dole out large sums of money to the relatives of those who had been killed. An astronomer in California thought he knew what had happened but he kept his mouth shut not out of any fear of the government, but because he felt it was the right thing to do. One investigative fellow did put some rather interesting and curious events together after a bit of prowling. But since he was a career army reservist and did not wish to spend his summer obligations to Uncle Sam cleaning up gooney bird shit on Guam , he kept his mouth shut.
"Someday, maybe he will write a book about it, and maybe by them he would believe it himself and be assured of the protection of the Dali Lama in some cave in Tibet.
What he had pieced together was that almost at the precise moment of fiery impact with earth, a series of fires leveled a huge man that was seen leaving earth, moving toward the heavens traveling at tremendous speed. No one knew what that thing was or if they did, they weren't saying, and there were some people who still remained unaccounted for after the fire at the mansion.
One of them was a young man by the name of Alex Balloon who was a minister in Wheatfield who had died under very mysterious circumstances back in "52" when another disaster had befallen the tragedy-ridden community, butt the investigative reporter wisely closed his journal on both disasters for a time.
It had been adnormally hot for this late in the season. By this time in the eastern part of Nebraska there was usually a lash of winter's approach in the air, a bit that brought color to the cheeks of pedestrains urgently but softly speaking of the harsh winter just ahead.
But the winds that blew across the plains and rolling sands hills had a torrid touch and brought a sudden surliness to the people of this sparsely populated county, turning most tempers raw and confusing a few as to why. The man knew why.
The few would learn too late. And out in the badlands some miles from Wheatfield , inside a fenced-in area where horror sprang to life back in the late 50's something stirred. A creature cautiously stuck its head out of the hidden cave and looked around, viewing its surrounding through evil, red eyes. The beast had felt the hot fingers of the wind pushing through the cave entrance as a probing hand might do, signaling those which serve another master that it was time.
The Dark One was near. The wind grew in strength and heat the beast snarling in reply. The manlike creature rose from its sentry position to crawl out of the filthy hole, rising to stand like human bits of dust and twigs and blowing sand striking its hairy body.
But to the beast it was a signal of love, a gesture of welcome. The beast roared its breath foul. It held its contempt for that God who occupies a more lofty position than the master of the beast.
For the creature knew but one god: the Prince of Darkness, the Lord of the Flies, Ruler of all that is Evil.
From behind the sentry came a guttural sound as other beasts rose from their long sleep, surly and hungry . They craved meat and the sweet taste of blood, but the sentry again tested the wind as the wind spoke its reply.
The sentry held up one warning paw to those below, holding them at bay. He growled and the others drew back into the darkness of the evil smelling hole in the earth. They knew they must obey the master. Thee growling sentry told them to wait the master will tell us when we may move. Be patient for you have waited more than twenty years. Wait." [mehr]
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Susan Willingham
Crystal Masquerade
- Kurzgeschichte
- Englisch
- 1508 Wörter
- Keine Altersempfehlung
- 496
- 2
CRYSTAL MASQUERADE
By Susan Willingham
The girl didn’t know how she got there, but it seemed as though she had been with them her entire life. She had suddenly found herself living with a family where the people were made of crystals. They had the form of a normal flesh and blood person, but there were tiny, gleaming jewels of different colors making up their eyes, lips, hair, and skin. They looked like crystal dolls. The entire family was outwardly beautiful, each part of their perfect bodies sparkling with colorful clarity. The mother had black hair, each strand consisting of tiny gems of shimmering blue-black onyx. Her eyes were of a brilliant sapphire, emblazoned with a radiant light, so brilliant that it was impossible to look at them for more than a few seconds at a time. Her lips consisted of jewels of ruby, like fiery embers of red, that flashed and moved when she spoke. Her teeth were a perfect glimmering white. When she moved, every minute gem of her body appeared to move singularly in a synchronized form. The rest of the family…father, son, and daughter, had the same likeness of appearance. The only difference was that the men were not as spectacular as the radiant women. Even the family dog was dazzling, with a beautiful coat of shining gold that moved with a fluid grace.
Another surprising thing was that their bizarre behavior did not seem to affect the rest of the town. The citizens of this ordinary town actually appeared not to notice their abnormality. The Crystal family interacted with others as if they were just everyday people. They had jobs and went to school like everyone else.
The girl observed the exquisite family closely while she was in their midst. Even though they appeared to have thoughts, feelings, and emotions of happy, rational human beings, there was something different about them besides their appearance that she could only discern after a period of close observation. Their beauty was deceptive. Their smiles and laughter were too quick, too bright, too fake. There was some internal struggle, like a cancer eating away at their insides, consuming them, while they were frantically trying to ignore it. Their jeweled smiles hid their pain and they had beauty to cover their weaknesses. This family’s performance was convincing. The whole town was convinced. And maybe if the whole town believed the façade, they would believe it, too. But at times, when the girl looked closely, she could detect what appeared to be tears glistening behind their beautifully jeweled eyes. She wondered if they fell apart when no one was watching. Maybe they would let her in on their dark secret, their hidden torture, and she could help them somehow. But the farce was too deep, too hidden. They would only deny that anything at all was wrong. They were living among the dead.
They accepted the girl as if she were one of them, as if she had always been one of them - like maybe she had been born into their family, or that she was made of the same things as they were. She marveled at this and wondered why they welcomed her and why she felt so comfortable with them. Suddenly, with an awakening that struck here like a lightening bolt, she knew. She knew only too well. The girl had been drawn to them because she was becoming like them. She began to remember where she had come from. She saw herself running… running a hundred miles an hour in the wrong direction and searching for someone, something to save her from the chains that are holding her prisoner. She hoped someone would hear her crying and carry her away, perhaps a prince charming that would step in and save her life. She was running from the ugliness in her life that had instilled itself into her heart, making it cold and hard. She had a cesspool inside, just like the Crystal family, and if she didn’t clean it out and allow herself to be filled with “something good and wonderful”, she would become like them. Instead of a beautiful diamond heart that matched their jeweled outside, this picture perfect family carried around a hard black piece of coal. The girl could begin to feel her own heart freezing.
It was a slow fade, so slow that the girl didn’t realize that her life was anything but okay. It started when she was a child; it probably started before she was even born. The life was all she knew and she thought everyone else’s life was the same. She thought that it was normal to live in a family where the father drank himself into a stupor every night. She thought it natural that her father would beat her mother until she cried out in hushed whimpers. She was remembering it all now, the past crashing in on her like a tidal wave, knocking her to her knees. She was dredging up memories of the abuse, the drunkenness, the fear. Suddenly the girl was back in her childhood, hiding under the porch all alone with her demons, clutching the puppies that her pet Evie had given birth to recently. She stroked and consoled them as if they, too, felt the dread of the fight above them and were also dismayed at what the future held for them.
The girl was heaving with the burden of shame she had carried since she was a child. She continued to carry that shame as she grew into her teens and began to realize how sick her family and her life were. She felt beneath her classmates and friends, and believed that if they really knew her and knew what her life was like, they wouldn’t like her at all. She was rejected by the “popular” kids because she wore old clothes and lived in an ugly house, and everyone in the small town knew about her father. Soon she found drugs, and in the first instance she tried them, she felt complete. She felt powerful, in control, beautiful, rich, everything that she was not. The drug crowd accepted her. They didn’t seem to care where she lived, what she wore, or that she had a father that was an alcoholic. They had the same problems as she did, and some worse. Even though the drugs worked for her for a while, they eventually became ineffective in covering her pain. The girl found herself searching for something else, anything to make her feel okay. She tried it all and nothing worked. That is when her heart began to harden and she put a wall up to keep out the hurt and shame.
The next thing the girl knew she found herself living with these beautiful people make of crystals. She had to leave them. She had to find the answer for her life, and the answer was not in beauty and riches. She had to find “Something Good and Wonderful.” She dropped to her knees in anguish. It was there that she found the answer. She would take back her life from the demons that had snatched it since she was small. She would take back her identity, her heart, and her soul. She would find out who she was and what her values were. She would no longer believe the lies of her past, the lies of the devil…that she was no good. She would no longer live with shame and with the misery of jumping from place to place, relationship to relationship to find happiness. The “Something Good and Wonderful” spoke to the girl and said “Do you want to be free? Lift your arms. I have the keys for the chains that bind you.” She was free! She would go back to the Crystal family one last time to tell them the good news.
When the girl went to them, she saw that they had gotten worse. Their appearance was even more perfect and beautiful than she had remembered. They were trying harder to delude themselves. She confronted the mother and told her about the “Something Good and Wonderful.” The beautiful woman slowly shook her head, her hair flashing with the motion, her ruby lips trembling. Her amazing cerulean eyes began misting with a slow agony. They gazed at each other for what seemed like eternity. Slowly the girl could see the woman’s flawless body begin to melt, her lovely features fading away. The colorful crystals ran together into a dripping twinkling wax. The onyx of her hair blended with the blue of her eyes and with the red of her lips, creating a merging color of sparkles, shimmering into a pool on the floor beneath her. The girl stared at the glittering substance on the floor in front of her and gravely watched as it changed into a colorless powder. Sorrowfully, she scooped the powder into the palm of her hand and softly blew, scattering it into a mist of a million tiny pieces. [mehr]
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