very good

Unless memory fails me, you added the Prologue and the beginning chapters recently Glynis? I'm pretty impressed with how you've opened at any rate; the ISBI team cornering the unfortunate werewolf, and the rapid-fire movement of the scene. Throughout this intro and the following chapters you insert some excellent descriptions, for example on Pg. 13: "A hypnotic, piquant odor filled his senses..." Very visual to me.

You introduce a LOT of characters in these short, fast-moving chapters, in different seemingly disconnected scenes, and I assume each will tie in as the book progresses. They aren't just little vignettes standing alone?

You introduction of the crime scene, which brings Sara in is excellent! I had one thought regarding the closed door, though. If I were fleeing, I might NOT close the door, but then again I might slam it shut with a hand as I leave. The window is also closed...what would make the detectives think that was her point of departure? Perhaps the door could be locked? They had to force it? Not sure how best to handle that...maybe something else regarding the window, like it being fully open, curtains moving in the wind/breeze? Small thing, worth thinking about in rewrite.

Tense shift is my main concern. You are narrating in past, but you tend to drift. Ie., Pg. 13, "They've hunted..." Maybe, "They'd hunted..." We ARE in past.

Pg. 31, "...out of this, she'll need her wit..." Better, "...out of this, she'd need her wit..."

These are two examples of the tense shifts I noticed. You might want to have a second look. By the time we get to Ch. 14, the otherwise excellent story is filled with the shifts!

Excellent story. Let me say again, overall your writing is great. The short, snappy chapters are an asset, moving the reader quickly. Sara and Wash are extremely well-drawn, and Sara's connection to the gruesome murders described early-on keeps me sympathetic to her, and interested in exactly where it will lead, and to what extent Wash will buck heads with the police department in his quest to help her.

Nice...:)

Wow, I want to criticize your work and all because your writing is MUCH greater than mine. It's obvious you've taken the time to plan out and write this book. It's FANTASTIC! I'll definitely be reading the rest today. :) You're an amazing writer, if I was as good as you I'd be publishing books from one end to the other! I've always imagined what It'd be like with a book that's so great, anyone who reads it will be encouraged to read it again. Your book makes me want to do exactly that. (I know it sounds corny, but...) I feel like just reading your books could make me better. My grammar may be off on different accounts, but it's hard to revise and NOT get a writers block on all my stories. I like just reading you books, because in a sense it makes me feel like it opens my mind up a little bit more. Excuse me for the extremely corny response to this, but it's absolutely amazing. I could see myself going to a bookstore and seeing yours on the selling racks, even you name fits as a good book author. (Again, it sounds corny but who cares) <3 love your books!!!!

I've made major chances to Believe, it's now a novel. I'm adding a few chapters at a time just to see how people react. I hope you like what I've done so far, if not back to the beginning.

The Book Trailer for Believe.

Sara doesn't trust. After she was abandoned in the woods by her parents, Sara has lived a hard, ugly, scary life in the foster care system.

Now after the murder of her foster parents, the police was looking at her for answers. Sara told them actually what they wanted to hear. She didn't lie, she just didn't tell them the whole truth. She doesn't trust the police with the truth, because they had never been there when she needed them.

Her life has been filled with lies and disappointments from people that were supposed to care about her. She didn't trust anyone, yet she desperately needs someone she can tell what really happened to her parents.

Can Sara overcome her fears and mistrust to finally open up to someone and will that someone Believe.
http://youtu.be/q6XtWkB0D7U

......Interesting......

Glynis, I enjoyed reading Believe. My attention was focused on the story from beginning to end. An excellent story. Great writing! I look forward to reading more in the series

This is a very good piece. The whole approche in quite mature and the presentation is professional. Good job!

Good imagination. If you clean this up conventionally and continue to refine it, it could be a truly great Bookrix addition.

This is a well-crafted story with lots of originality. There was a good balance between description and dialogue and I really enjoyed it overall. Very well done!