ok try some of my others if you didnt like this one

ok try some of my others if you didnt like this one

very amature writing style , word choice is wrong, but i think with practice that this writer could flourish.

isorry bun i never read it all i would like to but its hard to read with the brght red back grond

I like the consept. Some of the things could be placed a little better but other than that its good.

thats really a good stry i like ist you should try to make a longer one myber 30 pages at the most or more

Really enjoyed you story,I hope their is more to come,And soon!!!!

... some of the stuff is wrong but the book is ok...

... some of the stuff is wrong but the book is ok...

... some of the stuff is wrong but the book is ok...