i love this story just lov it

i completely loved it. A howl in the night is still my favorite but this is a very close second. plz continue. i dont know a more gifted writer than you. Keeep Writin Girl!

awsome

I think the book could go further into the story of the couple and it would make a great read for those who have good taste for a story. And if there was something about the England kingdom trying to force the two apart or trying to use Evangeline against France.It could make it even more interesting.

I would read it to the end.

this book is amazing. well done! i voted for your book! good jobs! check out my book! its called "ROSEWOOD" :)

love this story. It's unique and made me cry. You certainly got my vote!

You've certainly got a point there.

I thought this was the finished article, but if it's a work in progress and you're going to improve it and research over time, then why not!

At the end of the day, if you feel passionate enough, you can achieve anything.

I hope one day you can prove me wrong and demonstrate how this genre was exactly within your area of expertise.
Good on you.
Wendyxx

writingmum,

I really appreciate your critique. I have already fixed the "toilet" mistake. While you commented, I was doing a round of editing, so some of the concerns you had might have already been solved. When you say "taken on too much", well, that might not be the best thing to say. Everyone can improve, and I feel with time and deep editing, it will improve greatly. This isn't like a project with a deadline. It can develop in time as my skills grow. I am currently doing research on it as I write this. I do take your point though about the describing things though.

Thank you for your insight and your read! I hope you have a good day,
lucky97

It looks like you've put a lot of effort into this story and I commend you for your dedication.

I think it may have been easier for you if you'd written it in the third person. It would have given you more scope to narrate the story you wanted to tell.

I saw your comment below and I'm afraid I had the same impression with the historical aspect. Things like 'go and clean the toilet.' They wouldn't have had toilets. It would have sounded better if she'd said 'Go and empty the chamber pots.'

To be honest, i think you've taken on a bit too much with this story. We are told when we write that we should write about what we know. I would have struggled with something like this and I'm pretty au fait with my history.

Perhaps if you'd made it a modern day romance, with the same story line, but he could be a titled person and she a lowly member of the household.

Apart from the actual story, I wanted to mention your over usage of descriptive terms. You do it too much and it makes the read seem jarred. Not everything needs describing. If you want me to expand on that statement i will, but i have to read the other entries in the contest.

Please remember that this is just one person's opinion. You have some hearty votes here, so the details I have mentioned may not matter to everyone.

Good luck. It's going to be an interesting contest.
Best wishes
Wendy

I didn't really focus all that much on the historical aspect. However, I would like to add real quick that this is a love story. The reason why I wasn't super "technical" about the history was because I felt that doesn't matter all that much. I can see your point though. If you really think this is very unrealistic because of some modern terms, then I'm sure others will too. Thank you for reading, and I will go through it.

lucky97