I like the story line, but needs editing, I get lost and had to back-track to follow the story line several times...need to expand on some areas to fill in information to make concept flow easier and to smooth out confusion...

I like the story line, but needs editing, I get lost and had to back-track to follow the story line several times...need to expand on some areas to fill in information to make concept flow easier and to smooth out confusion...

great talent.book with a lot of potential

Huh?

St6r6666666

The stlye that you have chose to devolop the thread is quiet impressive.

The content is great . I just wish there had been more of it. I would love to buy an expanded version.

Thank you for participating in our
fiction writing contest "My Best Fiction".

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I really enjoyed the story. The conflict between good and evil is a continuous battle. I only noticed one place of a missed word....Page 16...he realized that there -----no children... other that that it was a great read.

I think you've done really well with this story. Good work.