wow. SOOOO good. a lot of errors but its usually spelling or puncuation. easily fixed. good story line so far. didnt even see the whole god thing coming. see, i cant even soak it in yet i wasnt expecting it. umm...i didnt really like a few words you used because it forced the changing of the tone so perhaps different words, like...member (for Bryson) and maybe pocket (for Victorria). but its your choice so...im just used to... mehr anzeigen
wow. SOOOO good. a lot of errors but its usually spelling or puncuation. easily fixed. good story line so far. didnt even see the whole god thing coming. see, i cant even soak it in yet i wasnt expecting it. umm...i didnt really like a few words you used because it forced the changing of the tone so perhaps different words, like...member (for Bryson) and maybe pocket (for Victorria). but its your choice so...im just used to reading the softer romance scenes, like Johanna Lindseh, not the types like this.
please keep writing and let me know when you update again!