Amber, I've just read your book; I felt your frustration and anger, and the cry behind the words...help! I connected with your anguish of being a giver, always THE giver holding the family together, and all the while desperately wanting a life of your own. Your words leave a haunting sound of hopelessness. At the end, you wrote...he starts to scream and pound against the walls; I was poised, waiting for your voice to lead me ahead...for the rest of the story. You have a grand way around your words, you write with an intelligent eye, and this should carry you far. I am glad we connected and I had the privilege of reading your story. Wa do, Elizabeth

Hi razilber! Thanks for the review. This is actually a nonfiction piece about a moment in my life, so all the characters and events are real. But I understand that the way it's written, and the tone might make it come off as cliche'. When I read it over I think I went a little overboard with the descriptions, and I agree that each of our characters fit the into the categories you provided: alcoholic father, martyr and savior. Thank you for pointing those out for me, I appreciate it. I wrote this for a non-fiction class in college, so it definitely can use some editing.

Thanks joeparente! I'm really glad you enjoyed it. I'll definitely read your story, I think I already started it, it was one of the first I checked out.

Hi,
I read through your book. Your writing technique is consistent, and clear. However the characters are a bit cliche, the alcoholic father, the martyr mother, the saviour daughter. It well written, but this story has been told many times. If you could focus on these characters through some new perspective it would improve the story.
But good job on the writing. I know that it must have taken a long time, and sometimes it seems lonely and hopeless. Keep writing, and all the best.

Hi,
I read through your book. Your writing technique is consistent, and clear. However the characters are a bit cliche, the alcoholic father, the martyr mother, the saviour daughter. It well written, but this story has been told many times. If you could focus on these characters through some new perspective it would improve the story.
But good job on the writing. I know that it must have taken a long time, and sometimes it seems lonely and hopeless. Keep writing, and all the best.

That was a great lesson in descriptive story telling. You had me from the start. Really a screwed up family but still a family. You did a very good job in writing this picture of a tortured alcoholic father and a mother that was stuck with him. I am saving this one as special./joeparente. If you get a chance read "THE RECIPE"

I enjoyed reading your book. Wish u gd luck. Voted.

This is a very good book well done Amber hope to read more soon

eman

Thank you for participating in our short
story writing contest "Family Stories".

The Librarian