but one sentence did bug me a bit. On page 7, where it says "she was the most beautiful thing she had ever seen"... well, in Honors English class, we are taught to NEVER use the word "thing", so I think it may be better if you change "thing" to a different word. Also, keep a lookout for the word "thing in all of your books and try to find a word that would work instead of "thing".

Other than that, I really did like this story. I really like how he has not been with a woman for 12 years.

Very good ending as well. Not what I was expecting at all... Which made it all the better.

I remain your fan. :D

~Jazz

I really loved this book I just wanna say go head. I felt so much emotions reading this book bout that's a good thig in my eyes.Oh killer ending.

:)cc:)

This is the first story of yours that I have read, and I have to tell you that I loved it! It is well written, heartfelt and kept me interested the entire time. My eyes welled up when he was telling the story of his wife, and then again at the ending. Wonderful story!
I saw one little mistake on the bottom of page 26 - you wrote Jeffry instead of Jeffrey :)

A fantastically written story. I was certainly intrigued by the turn around of events from the word go and my intrigue didn't stop until the very last sentence.

I couldn't find any faults apart from you starting two paras with ing words, which I oppose. It may be worth you tweaking them.

'Fidgeting, he scurried over to the window...'
(he can't fidget at the same time as he scurries)

'Leaning in, Adam peered at his wrinkles...'
He can't peer while he's leaning-in. He needs to lean in and then peer at his wrinkles. So it would become 'Adam leaned in and peered at his wrinkles.'

Little things, i know, but best to get out of the habit of doing it, seeing as you're fast becoming one hot writer.

Some deserving accolade for your description of Gabby at the door. Very impressive. And also the part in the restaurant where she explained the food they would be eating. Made me hungry. A sure sign of good writing for it to have such an effect on the reader.

Loved everything about this story. A winner not just for the writing but by the detail you've incorporated into the parts within the story, even down to the past misdemeanors of the two lawyers. Very good.

Well done
Wendy

To get to read this for free was a real treat. As always, this was a draw you in story. The easy flow of your writing always makes me jealous! You never disappoint. Great job.

nahar falmer crapde malshe

Very smooth. I like how you made angels seem very plausible, but the only one who saw it was a child. Without substantiation it left you wanting to believe, like a child. Cool.

Dude you killed it once again. I'm never disappointed when I read your work. Bravo!

Just as i expected another great story!!

Review - Every now and then you find an exceptional story written by a vastly talented person. Setting, descriptions, plot, characters, all flowed seamlessly, leaving me sad it was over at the end. Yet satisfied for the glorious ending it was. I'm humbled that I could ever think I could write something even remotely as wonderful as this story. I strongly suggest that you enter this at Writer's Digest or Glimmer Train. It's a sure win. Superb job. Robynn