Prologue

Prologue

 

It’s been ten years sins the last time anyone in my family has heard from my youngest brother James older than me by only a year but the youngest of my three brothers. James was always stubborn always wanted the easy way out of everything and he was the most disappointed when my father decided ten years ago to finally retire from his outlaw ways and his criminal life style. My name is Alexis Ross I'm 28 years old at 5 foot I'm average build with an average weight. My long dark hair and hazel eyes makes me an average Italian girl. Although I’m only half Italian on my father’s side, we not sure exactly what my mother’s side is but some where there is Italian as well.  I and two of my brothers have dark hair and brown eyes, while my youngest brother and sister have slightly lighter hair and blue eyes.

My father was a master criminal with insurance fraud i don’t know the details to his criminal career or how he did what he did. What I do know is it was ten years ago that my whole world turned in a blink of an eye and everything went to hell in a hand basket. i was in my senior years of high school, it was just another morning finishing to go off to school, my father was getting ready to go to work and James was supposed to go to college. What started as a normal day soon turned to chaos when my mother went into labour with our baby sister Amanda and the last born of our five children. I overheard my father, and my older brothers Anthony and Vincent as well as their lifelong friends Sam and Johnny, discus a job the night before.  The ‘job’ was to commence later that morning but everything change when my father had to rush mother to hospital and James decided it’s high time he was included in the family criminal activities much to mothers objection.

 I was at school while Amanda was born a beautiful healthy baby despite some complications due to mother's over stressing, and the job I later heard failed. It was a complete ambush Sam was shot dead and Anthony was arrested. Jonathan and Vincent got themselves and James safely back home. No one knows how the police knew where they were gone be, but somehow the police was tipped off and everything went to hell.  That was the last day my father ever took part in any ‘job’.  The family quit all criminal activities from that day on. It was the hardest day for our family Sam and Jonathan were as much a part of our family as my brothers was, and my parents always regarded them as such. Losing Sam was like losing one of my brothers, and losing Anthony at the same time was just too much.

My father blamed himself for a long time wandering what he did wrong or how he could have foreseen it. It was the hardest on my mother she withdrew and devoted all her attention to the baby. Our once close family fell apart after that. James took off a few weeks later and didn’t tell anyone where he was going just said farewell and left.  Anthony did two years in jail for grand theft auto. Vincent spend all his time down the street at Emily’s house they got married a few months later and now have twin boys. Johnny and his mother moved away after Sam’s funeral as it was just too much for Mrs Pirelli to continue living there.

 I graduated and got married a year later, marriage didn’t work so well for me so I got divorced after only eight months and is currently back living with my parents raising my daughter and helping out with Amanda, working  at the insurance company now  since father’s health has made it difficult for him to continue working. Life has been pretty mundane until now.

Chapter 1

 

I knew something was wrong when I arrived home and mother said that Vinnie, Emily and the kids was coming over for dinner. It wasnot anyone’s birthday and it was Sunday which was when they usually came over. “Is something wrong mom?” I asked my mother knowing dead sure something was up. “What makes you think something is wrong Lexi?” “Vinnie and them never come around in the middle of the weak, and you have a look of utter distress on your face, so what is it mom?” Before she could answer I heard the familiar scream of Vinnie’s twin boys Sammy and Xander  “Granma grandpa we here” “we in the kitchen darlings” “Grammy hello, hello aunt Lexi” the always have a way of talking as one and more than once you have to look to see which one is which they sound so alike. “There’s  my favourite grandson’s” “we’re your only grandsons granny” “Aunt Lexi where is Megan and Amanda” “they in their room playing dolls but make sure to say hello to your grandfather first!” i had to yell after them cause the minute they got the location of the girls they ran off.

Amanda and my daughter Megan has become more like sister since we moved back just over three years ago when my father’s health stated failing and he couldn’t work anymore . With only two years age difference between them they have become really close.“Hello mom, Lexi, did the boys greet before running off?” “hello Em yes they did” with greeting out of the way and everyone  settling with a drink while we wait for supper to finish I finally find out the reason my mother asked my brother Vincent to come around in the middle of the week. “So what is so urgent that it couldn’t wait till Sunday” he asked her. “I’m sorry I had to ask you to come over but I had the most disturbing call from your brother Anthony this morning. It was regarding James”  “Oh that are to be good, ten years not a word then phone call and everyone has to drop everything cause it’s about  James” “Vincent that’s enough mind your mother” “yes father, I’m sorry mother you were saying” I could tell by my father’s tone of voice whatever my mother was about to say wasn’t good. “James is in hospital, Anthony says he is stable but he doesn’t look well” “What happened?” I realised the words was out of my mouth before i even noticed and with a much higher pitch in my voice than what I wanted.

 My mother took more than the necessary amount off deep breaths to steady herself and even after that it was my father who spoke it seemed like my mother was at a loss for words. “He took a job, a big one and he blew it, bad.......” “So they got to him”   Vinnie finished my father’s sentence but we knew there was more to it so we waited in silence for my parents to continue. After what seems like forever and endless silence conversation between my parents my father continued “He took the job from Mike Mcklousky” “they gone kill him” my mother sobbed the last part not giving my father time to finish his sentence and then the tears was streaming down her face.

My mother loves all her children but she has a very special place for James he is her last born boy and always been her baby just like Amanda there is three years age difference between him and Vincent who is a year younger than Anthony. My father calmed my mother and we left them a bit to set the table for dinner. Emily with her fiery red hair and always vibrant loud self was very silent throughout dinner tending to the children more than necessary. My mother tried hard to hold it together and i listened attentively as my father and Vincent discussed all different ways and means to solve the situation. Vincent was a spitting image of my father at 6 foot something broad shoulders and a no nonce attitude which is probably why he is such a good lawyer.

 At the end of the evening only one conclusion could be reached the job will have to be done or big mike Mcklousky will have James killed. Who was going to do it and how it will be done was to be discussed the next day when Anthony was bringing James home to us from the hospital. No one was pleased at this specially not Emily, she knew all about Vincent’s past criminal life and how he helped our father out with insurance frauds but he put that life behind him when he married her and neither of them would like to relive it specially not with the risk involved and their two small children to think about. “Family is family if it was your cousin” it was all Vinnie said to her and she under stood very well what he mend. Emily was Sam and Johnny's cousin and she knew what family mend, it’s the only thing you will ever die for no matter what. Die was the one option no one was going to even consider. I offered to clean up after Vincent and they left so my parents can go to bed. My mother looked exhausted it’s as if she has aged ten years just in the course of the evening and my father looked so pale.

chapter 2

I saw Vinnie’s SUV parked in the drive way as i arrived home, in front of it stood a sleek very sexy skyline I knew before I even entered the house or ask about the car that it belonged to James. He always had a thing for flashy fast cars and Nissan skyline was always his big thing. I was clearly the last to arrive at this unpleasant party and for a second I reconsidered if I wanted to be here. I heard his voice from the porch and almost ran right into Anthony’s arms. “Are you going to stay out there the entire time?”

 Oh Anthony the oldest and my favourite brother. He always treated me like his little princess, protecting me teaching me how to protect myself and always being there for me except when I needed him the most, when I found out my husband was cheating on me. He was the one i missed the most when he went to prison and after wards when he thought it best to move away.  Now my brother is back but under unpleasant circumstances, I gave him a once over he hasn't changed all that much in ten years, he might be a lil taller defiantly over seven foot, his hair is longer touching his collar he is a lot more buff looks like he spends a lot of time in the gym but overall he still looks just like always.

 It will be the first time ever since Amanda was born that all five of us will be under the same roof at the same time. “Hi stranger what brings you around?" it was a rhetorical question but it just seemed like the best thing to say to my brother whom I haven’t seen in way to long. He lifted me up in his bear hug and spun me around making me squeal. “Oh I’ve missed you kid” “Nice to see you too, but I’m not a kid no more” I said bitterly, I might have been when he left but its along time ago. “Yeah I’ve noticed. I met your daughter she is beautiful Lexi” He was trying to make light of the conversation so I decided not to give him to hard a time. “Thanks Ant, let’s go inside we have so much to catch up on”

 Inside I was met by screaming kids, the smell of my mother’s roast chicken with too much rosemary a very battered and bruised James and his girlfriend Dina. Now I always make a habit of never judging someone before I get to know them, but something was off with this Dina girl and I wasn’t the only one to notice. When the girl threw her arms around me in a hug I saw Emily mouth “trouble”. She seemed sweet, very overly friendly. She was a petite girl, short curly blond hair didn’t look a day over nineteen which mend we all though her too young to date James. I picked up straight away Anthony didn’t like her, and I was pretty sure it wasn’t just the age that was a problem but I couldn’t tell for sure. So I made a mental note to ask Anthony about her first chance I get.

We all talked for a little bout nothing really the usual, how have we all been? What’s the latest gossip? and so on.  Emily and I helped mom dish the food up and we all basically ate in silence except for Dina who kept on talking and talking. “Lauren this is such a lovely home you have and this food is amazing, isn’t it amazing Jamesy” At the mention of her nick name for James Emily and myself made gag faces, Anthony nearly chocked from trying to not to laugh.  Through it all no one mentioned the reason James and them are back, his badly beaten up body or the job he messed up. As dinner was coming to an end tension was building we all knew what was coming but none of us really wanted to talk about it.

After dinner the boys volunteered to do the dishes since mom and Emily worked so hard on supper but dad had another idea “Leave those dishes the woman can clean up, let us men go talk in my study” “Oh no you don’t Alexander” My mother’s voice was stern and it mend she is not to be argued with. I can only count a handful of times I heard my mother call my father by his full name and none of them ever mend any good. “This is a family problem, we are going to address it as such” “This is between me and the boys woman” “No they are my boys too and this time we are going to deal with it as a family. No more secrets it’s too dangerous” My father raised his hands above his as to indicate he surrender “Very well then we’ll do it your way, boys go help clean up we will address this business when you’re done”

While the guys did the dishes and the clean up off the kitchen me and Emily put the kids to bed with a movie in their room and Dina entertain my parents with more of her babbling. Our tasks took forever I thought to myself the boys deliberately took longer than necessary just to avoid the confrontation that was coming. “You all best take a seat, against my better judgement your mother though it a good idea that we all listen to this and find a solution to the problem together. James if you don’t wish for your girlfriend to be here she can go watch tv in the other room” I knew as my father made the suggestion that he was hoping James will agree Dina should leave. “No father Dina is as much a part of this as I am she is staying.” As he said it I saw Emily look to Vincent who looked at Anthony who in return just shook his head in a “don’t ask me” kind of way. “Very well then, why don’t you tell us exactly what happened and how you got yourself in this kind off mess”

My father’s voice was underlined with anger and we all know there was a lot more he mend to say but didn’t, not in front of us at least. “You already know I took the job from Big Mike Mc, well it was the same as all the other jobs, he gave me the keys to the cars I make them disappear he put in an insurance claim we make sure the claim goes through no hassle and when the heat is of he gets his cars back. Simple” “Not simple, if it was simple you wouldn’t look like you do what went wrong?” “It was simple dad, it’s just my inside guy in the insurance the one I always use bailed on me, I went to Mike and explain I couldn’t do the job no more because I had no inside man. He wasn’t as understanding as I hoped he would be and his guys got a little rough, said I took the job I best finish it or he will finish my family until I do or until he runs out of my family members whichever one comes first” 

 James didn’t look up when he finish talking, he knew it and no one needed to say it. He messed up and he messed up big time. Everyone know when you take a job from Mike McKlousky you finish the job he means business and he don’t mind getting his hand dirty and killing a few people along the way. For a while no one spoke father was considering everything James said and was clearly thinking of a way out or what should be the next step. I saw Emily saying silent prayers that there is another way out.  I knew the most logic thing to do would be to finish the job, but it wouldn’t be that easy. James has no inside man and that is one of the key elements in a insurance fraud scheme someone inside.

There’s always me since I work in the head office of the insurance company but I didn’t dare open my mouth not with all the tension in the room.   “You said cars, are we to assume its two and not just one car?” Everyone looked up as Vincent asked the question to James that didn’t really seem like it mattered to me but clearly it was imported information in an operation like this. “No there are five cars.” “Five cars” Vincent repeated the words in utter disbelieve. “Five cars is impossible, it can’t be done” “It’s not that impossible Vinnie I have it all figure out” “I hate to burst your bubble little brother it has never been done it can’t be done!” “Enough! Both of you!. James, Vincent is right it’s never been done before and without an inside man it can’t be done”

 “Dad we have to do it, they gone kill me if we don’t” Almost immediately after James said that my mother started to cry, Emily’s knuckles turned white as she squeezed Vincent’s hand as for some kind of support. Anthony just sat there shaking his head as if he can’t believe what he is hearing.  My father looked at my mother “I just can’t see it being done.” “Are you not listening to him, they gone kill him there has to be a way Alexander”. “I can do it” Everyone suddenly looked at me as if they forgotten I was even in the room, and I realized I had actually said the words out loud.

“What did you say?” James asked in astonishment. “I said, I can do it. I can be the inside man.” “No! Under no circumstance no way tell her dad” It was the first time Anthony spoke since this conversation started and now it is to tell me I’m not helping. Ignoring Anthony James turned to me with more curiosity.  “Humour me, just how exactly do you plan to help?” “I don’t need to humour you James, what you talking about is a major insurance claim. It’s the kind of claim that passes all the little people and goes straight to head office. That’s why it’s never been done before. Now do you have someone in head office that can make this go through?”  James snorted in annoyance because he clearly never thought of the fact that this isn’t a normal claim. “No, but I’m guessing you know someone”

James’s tone of voice was dry and sarcastic so I decided not to answer instead it was Vincent who answered “Alex works at head office” “Wait you work at head office? You will do this, put the claim through?”  I was about to say yes I will help because he is family when Anthony decided to make his point as to why I’m incapable of helping.  “No she is not going to get involved, she has no experience in any of this. It’s dangerous dad please tell her no” My mother decided to answer Anthony’s plea.“Anthony clam yourself if your sister wants to help let her” “But mom” “No buts” “Dad” Finally all attention was back at my father as Anthony try to plea that I should not be a loud to be involved

“Anthony is right, it is dangerous, and I would not want my daughter involved in this. That is why we retired this business, years ago. “My mother wanted to protest and Anthony wanted to celebrate that he won. When my father held up his indicating his not done talking and everyone kept their mouths shut. He took a deep breath and continued. “However desperate times call’s for desperate measures and I see no other way but to let Alexis help if she is up to it” Everyone looked at me, I knew they really didn’t want me to say I can help except for James and my mother, but I also knew we needed to do this not just for James but to make sure Mike Mcklousky don’t come after anyone else.  “I can do dad” I couldn’t make out if my father was pleased or disappointed with my decision all he said was, “Very well then it is settled we will discuss a more full prove plan in the morning right now we all need some sleep.”

That was the end of that discussion my father’s word was final and I was going to help save my brothers mistake.  Anthony had more objections to the situation, and Vincent looked like he could murder me not to mention Emily that had a look of betrayal on her face. Suddenly I didn’t feel so confident anymore but no way was I going to say it. The last thing my father said before he and my mother went to bed was “Anthony will you get started on that reinforcement” I wonder what that mend. I considered asking Anthony what reinforcements but didn’t think it was a good time. So instead I sneaked away before anyone can confront me on the matter of helping and risking a lot to do so. Anthony got up pulled out his phone and left the room without a word to anyone 

chapter 3

I woke up Saturday morning after eight which was odd since Megan and Amanda usually wake me up before seven on a Saturday to make them breakfast. I decided to take a quick shower and then to go and investigate where the kids and everyone ells where.  I found the kids in the kitchen with Vincent, James and father. “Good morning, where is everyone ells?”  “Morning sweetheart, your mother and the girls went to town they didn’t want to wake you, Anthony is on the phone in the library and we are all here making pancakes” “Morning mommy, uncle James is baking pancakes” “Morning Lexi” I shake my head at my father to state I understood gave my little angel a big hug and a kiss said morning to everyone ells and headed to the stove to give James a hand with the pancakes

“Need a hand with that?” “Please it would seem like cooking isn’t my strong point” There is a lot of things that’s not your strong point I thought but kept it to myself. “I see that, why don’t you sit and I’ll finish these” Anthony joined us half way through breakfast assuring my father that the reinforcement was taken care off. I still didn’t know what that mend and I got an uneasy feeling like I wasn’t sure I wanted to know. After breakfast I send the kids up to go brush their teeth and then go play outside. Father and the guys got started with the plan of the operation while I tidied the kitchen.

The morning passed by slow. The guys worked out the plan telling me every now and then where I came in and what my part will be. Anthony protesting it the whole time, me checking on the kids often making sure they are safe and all right playing in the back yard. It was just before lunch time when I heard Vincent’s SUV pulling into the driveway. “Sounds like mom and them are back” I said. Emily was first through the door grabbing my arm and hauling me to the kitchen “Dam Em what up with you, you nearly pulled my arm out of the socket” “Would you just get in here I have to tell you something” “Tell me what?”  But before she could say anything I heard the voice behind me and it was as if someone threw ice cold water over me.

 “Hello honey” I spun around and sure as water is wet there he stood Jonathan Pirelli. Dam it! What was he doing here, I turned to Emily who just gave me an apologetic smile and then the rest of the family followed into the kitchen. “Lexi you remember Jonny, we just picked him up from the airport” “I don’t think she does, or she is just shocked to see me” He said with a smile, the jerk. “Of cause I remember you!” My voice was ice and the look I gave him said I wished he’d drop dead. I held on to the counter to steady myself or to prevent myself from walking over to him and slapping that smug of his pretty face.

Now I might seem harsh to this very attractive, very sexy build like one of those underwear models, man but I have good reason to be. See Jonathan was always more than just sexy he is drop dead gorges. With pitch black hair and piercing blue eyes he was every girls dream guy back before he left and he knew it. With a reputation that he was with every girl in our neighbourhood that was his age, older or just a year younger girls knew to stay clear of him. I knew to stay clear of him but I didn’t. And like all the other girls I paid the price except in my case he didn’t dump me he just left. No good bye no nothing he just left and now ten years later he is back standing in front of me like nothing ever happened. Dam him.

 I gave myself a mental shake reclaim my good nature and turned to everyone ells. “I was just about to start lunch Em will you help, I was gone make sandwiches” “Sure I will let me just say hi to the boys quick” We made lunch and while everyone ells was gathered in the kitchen enjoying the sandwiches I was outside with the children enjoying our sandwiches, where I set up a picnic blanket under the tree. “Lexi, you’re not joining us?”  Trust Anthony to miss me “No I’m quite happy here with the kids” “Fair enough then I’ll join you guys out here seems much more fun” “Yeah” The kids was excited they love Uncle Anthony and in Amanda’s case her big brother who she doesn’t know. Can’t blame them I love Anthony he is a great guy but I have a feeling he is up to something. “May I join you?” “Yes” “Yes” The children all said together. “Lexi?” “Do as you please Anthony, the kids say yes so who am I to argue”

 “Anthony hey? Now I know you are mad at me you never call me Anthony unless you’re mad. So what’s up?” He thinks he is so smart, he can figure it out. “Nothing is up ok” Anthony gave me a wary look but I pointed to the children and he knew I wasn’t going to have this conversation in front of them so he let it go. It was a beautiful Saturday and after our little picnic Anthony started playing kick ball with the kids and was soon joined by my other brothers and Jonathan. My parents, Emily and Dina also came to sit outside. Me and Emily went inside to tidy up the kitchen. “I’m so sorry Lexi I tried to warn you but I couldn’t call and he was just too fast when we got here.” “It’s ok Em it’s not your fault plus it’s a long time ago. Just please don’t say anything, no one in my family know there was ever something between me and Jonathan and I would like to keep it that way” “You know I wouldn’t say anything. I’ve never even told Vincent, but I can’t lie to my husband if he asked me straight out.” “Let’s just hope with everything going on, Vince don’t notice nothing.” She shrugged her shoulders and we went outside to join everyone else.

  The rest of the Saturday was enjoyed in a family style fun day with kicking the ball teaming up girls against guys and everyone just relax all the drama forgotten for now. After our very exhausting day no one felt like making supper that evening so we just decided to order pizza. The kids hardly finished their pizza and before long they were all asleep. Unfortunately they all fell asleep downstairs so it mend they were going to have to be carried to bed, easy for Emily with her two boys she just get Vincent to do it. Stubborn me is a different story, Megan is my kid and I will carry her. “Em we need to go put the kids in bed you going to get Vince to carry the boys?” “Yes I will go tell him now. Who are you going to ask to carry the girls?” “No one there is nothing wrong with me, I’ve done it enough times.” “You know you going to start something now” “I have no idea what you mean” I gave a half a smirk smile, we both know she mend I’m going to upset Anthony by carrying the girls up the stairs.

 Anthony is still an old school gentleman and believes things like that a man should do. “Vinnie hun, would you please go put the boys to bed, Lexi will come fetch the girls now.” “Of course I will love and tell Lexi we are plenty of strong guys we will put the kids to bed quickly. James can carry Sammy, I’ll take Xander , Anthony can carry Amanda and...” “I will carry Megan” “Lexi don’t be silly, she is not as light as she use to be you going to fall carrying up the stairs.” “My daughter Vince I’ll carry her.” “Listen to your brother, I’ll help.” I ignored Jonathan and had Megan in my arms before he could reach for her to help carry her up the stairs. “Lexi” I gave Vincent a warning look and they all decided to back off. Anthony gave me a ‘this is not overlook’ and I knew I’d have to deal with him later, but for now I’ve won. I made my point of showing them I’m not helpless and I don’t need any ones help.

My, dealing with Anthony later, came sooner than what I expected. After I made sure all the kids was tucked in and turn the light out, reached the hallway and he was waiting for me. Leaning against the wall arms crossed across his chest I knew he was upset with me. “What’s your problem Alexis?”  “I don’t have a problem” “Don’t give me that crap, you have just short of hostile towards me, you point blank ignore Jonathan, and the look you gave Vince downstairs could raise the dead. So what the hell is wrong with you?” No way was he turning this all on me. “I don’t need anyone’s help with my kid, never had never will understood!” “We were just trying to help, no one said you needed it, it was offered but if it is such a big deal we wouldn’t do it again.” “Good then we understand each other. Now if you’ll excuse me.” “Oh no you don’t, you still haven’t told me what I did to upset you or why you are so out right rude to Jonathan” “I don’t have to explain myself” “Yes you do Alexis and I’m waiting.” There was no way around this Anthony wasn’t going to drop it until I told him what he wanted to know.

 “Fine you want to know, I’ll tell you. I’m sick off you treating me like a kid. I can’t help with this operation although you know without me you can’t pull this off and you could have told me Jonathan was coming. Sometimes you can be a real idiot Anthony.” He did seem to like my explanation. “I don’t think you should get involved in this job its dangerous and I have my reasons. As for not telling you Johnathan was coming I didn’t think it was a big deal unless something happen between you and Jonathan that I don’t know about?”  At that moment we both look up and Jonathan was standing at the top of the stairs “I’m sorry I didn’t mean to interrupt but there is a call for you Ant” “Take a massage” “She says its important” This was my way out of this conversation. “Go take your call we are done here.” Anthony looked from me to Jonathan and back to me, realising this is as much as he is going to get out of me he went down stairs to go take his call.

“What was that about?” Now I’m left facing Jonathan, this wasn’t a good idea.  “That was a private conversation between me and my brother Jonathan it has nothing to do with you.” “I beg to differ as I heard my name.” Of cause he did.  “If you so great at eves dropping then you know what it was about so I don’t need to repeat it” I moved to pass Jonathan and go down stairs I had no  intention of spending anytime in his company and I sure as hell didn’t want to be here alone with him right now.  As I reach the top step of the stairs he grabs my arm and pull be back so I’m face to face with him, he towering over me. “You didn’t tell him? “He looked confused. “Let me go Jonathan or I’ll scream” “Answer me Lexi” Pulling my arm from his grip I take a step back to the top of the stairs now with him on the top step we are the same height. “No I didn’t tell him” I said in a very low voice not wanting anyone to hear. “Why didn’t you?” “I don’t know, maybe because I don’t think there is anything to tell. Maybe I don’t want everyone knowing I was an idiot or tell me I was warned.”

 For a second I thought I saw some emotion cross his face. Impossible Jonathan Pirelli has no emotion, and even if he did I wasn’t going to stand around and find out. I march down the stairs past him, not looking back to see if he was following me.“Alex there you are, we want to watch a movie. Vinnie says to ask you where you keep the good movies these ones here are old we’ve seen most of it.” “Please Dina call me Lexi or Alexis, and Vince has a big mouth about my movies.” “Please, please can we watch it, he says you have the best in thrillers.” “You can watch it if you can convince Vince to go fetch it. I’m not going to.” “I’m not  going in your room, just now something bites me.” “That’s funny Vince, you mentioned it you go fetch it.”  “Fetch what” Anthony wanted to know entering the room with Jonathan behind him. “Lexi is hiding the good movies in her room and selfishly don’t want to go fetch it.” James grinned as if he just got me busted for some big secret.

 I rolled my eyes and decided going to go fetch the movies will be better that being around Jonathan or Anthony right now. I don’t need Anthony picking up on any more discomfort I have around Jonathan as it is he’s suspecting’s is spot on. We watched two movies and laughed more for Dina squealing and trying to hide behind James. I mean really if you wane watch a thriller make sure you’re up for it. She took all suspense out of the movie but I have to admit the kid is funny. I fell asleep somewhere into the third movie and woke up in my bed the next morning.

 

Chapter 4

Everyone was still sleeping, lying everywhere in the TV room as the kids, my parents and I left for church Sunday morning. I briefly wondered how I got into my bed last night and why I couldn’t remember going to bet, but decided maybe I didn’t want to know. It felt awkward going to church knowing that we are planning to commit fraud to save my brother. It wasn’t much comforting knowing if we didn’t do it James would end up dead and who knows who ells, it was wrong and sitting here in church made me feel sick. I said more than my usual prayers and asked for forgiveness before we even do this job. After church we hanged around a bit so my parents can talk to some of their friends like an old time ritual funny how they can seem so utterly normal.

Emily and Dina had Sunday lunch already started when we got home from church. James and Vincent quickly put the plans for the job away when we walked in, they were clearly going over some details. Anthony and Jonathan was nowhere to be seen and I decided it might be better the less we see each other. “So how was church” Emily seemed very chirpy so I decide to pick up on her mood and tell her all the latest gossip that went around after church which she missed out on.

”I heard from Darcy that Sara and Nico finally set a date for the wedding, now it’s a thing to find a venue cause it seems it’s the same time as Carol and Stevens wedding.” “Oh my word, that is going to be such a thing.” “Carol is determined to out shine at any cost” “Her poor parent’s bank account” At that we both burst out laughing. During lunch we finally talked about the job. Everything was going to take place Wednesday, the claim will be placed on Thursday and my father made sure everyone knew what they had to do. “So we all know what we will do. Anthony, James, Vincent, Jonathan and myself will be apprehending the cars. Wednesday night while the Mcklousky’s are assumingly out of town, an alarm will be triggered after the last car is cleared and by the time the security shows up we will be long gone. ” “We still have one other problem” At the mentioning of a problem Anthony had everyone’s attention

 “We don’t have a lookout” I saw Emily grin and knew what she was going to say before she even opened her mouth. “I can help” Vincent wasn’t having this. “No under no circumstances” “Why not?” “Because you are my wife and your place it with our kids and you don’t know the first thing about being a lookout.” “But I want to help, Lexi gets to help”   Jonathan nearly choked he clearly had no idea I was a part of this. He looked at Anthony and I could see the look of “I tried” on Anthony’s face. After several debates and arguing my father finally settled the discussion and it was decided that Emily would have no part in this, she wasn’t happy. Instead Dina will help with the apprehending of the vehicles only because James made everyone understand that she has done it lots of times before with him and she know what she is doing. Jonathan will then be the look out just like he used to be in the old days.

 No one seemed particularly happy with the arrangements except Dina and James, but then again if it wasn’t a case of life or death none of us would even be considering doing this. After we ate it was my turn to clean the dishes since Emily and Dina made the food. Everyone disappeared into their own directions, Vince and Emily decided to take the four kids for ice-cream just to take a break for a bit which I was very great full for. “Alexis can we talk” “Can it wait Jonathan, I’m a little busy” “No it can’t its important.” “Well I’m just busy as you can see.”  “Can we talk when you are done then it’s important?” I regard him with a wary look, he wasn’t his normal charming or flirty self and in all the years that I have known him so something told me it might really be important and that maybe I want to know what it is. “Ok fine we can talk as soon as I’m done here” “Fine you wash I’ll dry” He took the kitchen towel and started drying dishes as quick as I could wash them. He seems angry or irritated. “You really don’t need to help me.” “I really think I do. Like I said we need to talk and if you need to finish these dishes first I better help to make sure it gets done quickly so we can talk.” “That important huh?”  I raised my eyebrow to test the seriousness of the matter. “Yes” was all he said. I got a very uneasy feeling I can’t ever remember seeing him this serious about anything.

 We finished cleaning the kitchen neither of us saying another word. When we were done Jonathan gestured towards the back door and we both walked to the back yard quite a distance from the house before he spoke. And when he did it was in a stern no nonsense voice. “You are not being a part of this job Alex” Is he kidding right now. “You can’t tell me what to do Jonathan” If this is what he wanted to talk about he is wasting his breath, I turned to walk away very angered and defensive that he thinks he can tell me what to do. He grabbed my arm to prevent me from walking off but not enough to hurt me. He lowered his head almost like he was trying to find a diffract approach. When he looked back up at me his expression had softened somewhat but his voice was still stern like he was trying very hard not to lose control.

 “Ok, I’m asking you nicely not to be part of this please Lex” It was almost a plea and ten years ago I would have melted and told him ‘sure anything you want’. But this isn’t ten years ago and this isn’t something I can just walk away from they need me. So I tried reasoning with him. “Aw come on not you too, did Anthony put you up to this” “Anthony didn’t put me up to anything, thou I’m surprised he is allowing you to do this.” “He is not allowing me to do anything, I’m doing this to help James just like everyone ells.” “Please Lexi don’t do this” There it was again the  almost plea in his voice as he spoke running his hand through his hair. Dam this man is sexy but I’m not going to get distracted. I have strong feeling of dislike towards him and now he wants me to not get involved in saving my brother no way that’s happening. “Look Jonathan I don’t care what you and Anthony’s problem is with me helping, but you can’t stop me. I’m helping and that’s final” “Dam it Alexis can you for once stop trying to be so stubborn and stop trying to prove something we know you can do you are probably very capable of it, we just don’t want you to”

 Well I’m glad to hear that he think I’m capable, but if that’s what he thinks why is he trying so hard to stop me. “Why not give me one good reason why not” My patients with this conversation were starting to go thin and I’m guessing so was his. Problem was knowing the both of us and how stubborn we are neither was just gone give in. “Because this is going to end bad and we can’t risk you being involve” “You don’t know it’s going to end bad, stop being so negative John” He looked up at me and his whole expression changed and he lowered his voice. “Yes. I. Do know it’s going to end badly and I’m not being negative I’m trying to protect you. There are things you don’t know” “First of all you don’t care about me one bit so don’t pretend you do and second if there are things I don’t know then tell me” “I can’t” That is such crap “In that case this conversation is over, I’m out of here”       I turn to walk away but he still had a grip on my arm to stop me. “Don’t Lex, please don’t”

I really wish he would stop this pleading my heart wants to melt. “Are you going to tell me what’s going on?” he took an exasperating breath “Only if you promise not to say a word” Really if I didn’t know any better I would have guess he was stalling for something. “Dam it Jonathan what kind of game are you playing?” “It’s not a game it’s serious and by telling you I risk more than what you can imagine so I need your word you wouldn’t tell a single soul what I’m about to tell you” His entire body language change and he was being dead serious, do I really want to know what he knows. In all my years of knowing Jonathan I’ve never seen him this serious for the second time today. “I promise” “Ok now I’m trusting you with my life here.” “Gees John just get on with it already would you”   He runs his hand through his hair again as to weigh his option of telling me. ”Come on John I gave you my word surely it means something” This seems to change his mind.

“Me and Ant are undercover cops” I looked at him dumb folded, did I just hear him right. “COPS?” He covered my mouth with his hand. “Shhh yes cops” I moved his hand away and lowered my voice to just above a whisper. “What do you mean undercover, undercover for what? What does that have to do with this job and helping James?” “We trying to take down Mike Mcklouwsky, James don’t know, we warned him not to take the job to stay away from Mcklouwsky but he didn’t listen. We’re planning to use this job to move in on Mcklouwsky and take him down for good. That’s why we don’t want you involved” This sounds so unreal. “This is bigger than I imagined” “I know b” Did he just wanted to call me babe. I ignore it and continue with my questions.  “What about my family, Vince, dad, James what happens to them?” “We’re going to try and get Vince and your father out before it goes down, and for James if he turns witness he is save”

He gave me a time to proses the information and waited patiently for my next question. “So why tell me and not them?” This made him smile. “Because we can’t risk James tipping Mcklouwsky off and blowing this, and you don’t want to listen to stay out of it, you’re so stubborn.” That made me smile, me being stubborn is the one thing I wouldn’t deny. “Thanks for the heads up but if you and officer knuckle head haven’t realised I’m only in this because you have no other choice” “We will figure something out” I raised my eyebrow. “Like what? Come on Jonathan you and I both know there is no time to find an inside man you can trust with this, and even if you put another cop under cover you risk making everyone suspicions” He knew I was right but the stubbornness in him didn’t want to give in. “You don’t understand Lex, you are going to be the one dealing with Mcklousky when he comes to put his claim in if something goes wrong he goes after you first.”

No I might be a little worried. “Then you and Anthony better make sure nothing goes wrong, be honest John do you really have another alternative?” He shook his head. “Not really, but we don’t want to risk your involvement” we both thought about this, both sides made a valid point so what do we do. I might not know how real police work but I have seen a lot of cop movies. “So then wire me or bug my office or do what it is you do to make sure it all goes according to plan. “This time its Jonathan that raise his eyebrow at my suggestion. “Are you serious?” He looked at me as if I just spoke in a different language or something. “I’m as serious as a heart attack. Now go tell my brother the new plan, I have to go take a walk”  “He is not gone like this, this isn’t some cop and robber show on television”  “Him not liking it that’s your problem, and stop treating me like a kid living in a fantasy” I pulled my arm free from him cross my arms over my chest and waited for another disapproval from him. “When did you get to be this grown up” I just shook my head and walked away. I should have said about ten years ago.

I left Jonathan by the tree in the back yard, this was big. I had to get out of there just go for a walk and think this through. “Is everything alright Alex?” “Yes mom everything is fine, I’m just going for a walk?” “Of course, are you sure everything is alright? You are very pale” Today of all days my mother decides to take notice of my wellbeing. “Everything is fine mom just need some air and space” She wasn’t buying it but she let it go regardless. “Alright then if you say so” “Thanks mom I love you’’ I gave my mother a quick hug grab my jacket and head out the door and down the street, just aimlessly walking and thinking.

Cops, Anthony and Jonathan are cops if my family had to find out there will be hell. If James found out and turned on them they will be dead. Once again I was left caring a secret that wasn’t even mine to keep the story of my life. Before I knew it I was down by the river a few blocks from home I decided this might be a good place to think so I sat down with my back against an old tree. I thought about the secrets I keep of others and all the damage it will do if it ever came out. Then I thought of Jonathan and how even after everything that has happened he still gets to me, takes my breath away with that smile of his and those eyes that seems like they can see thru all the bulls*#t straight to heart of me, and I hated him for that for all of it. “Hi” I nearly jumped out of my skin when I heard the voice next to me and looked up to see Emily.

“Hi, what are you doing here I thought you took the kids for ice-cream.” “We did then we bought them to feed the ducks.” She pointed to the other side where Vincent was with the kids throwing bread crumbs to the ducks. “Any way I saw you sitting and figured I’ll do my sister in law duties and come see if you are ok” We both laughed at the ‘sister in law duties” comment and she sat down next to me. “So are you ok” I shrug. “It’s kind of a lot to handle.” She didn’t look at me just broke some bread of and threw it at the river. “Have you spoken to him, about why he didn’t say anything before he left?” She cut straight to the heart of it, I love this girl she knows me so well. “There’s nothing to talk about Em.” “He cares about you Lexi everyone can see it. They write it off as brotherly love but it’s clear as day.” “It doesn’t matter anymore.” She looked at me thought about what I said then shook her head as she got up. “I still don’t know all the details, but you should talk to him its better than hiding from it. And I should get back to my husband, you need a right back?” “No I’m good, I think I’ll stay a little longer if it’s ok.” She bend down gave me a hug. “of cause its ok we can handle the kids just be safe ok.” I nodded and watch her walk back towards the other side.

 I though about what she said and about Jonathan not wanting me to be a part of this because maybe he cared about me or maybe it’s just to make sure I don’t blow the case. But why tell me. Why didn’t Anthony tell me, didn’t he trust me? This whole thing seems so out of control. My head hurts from all the thinking, I thought this was gone help me clear my head instead it just made me tired and more confused.  I needed to head home and face all of this. I made my choice of helping now I have to stick to it no matter what.

I don’t know how long I was gone when I finally got back home, but when I realised it was getting dark I knew I was out to long. I noticed Vincent’s SUV was gone, they must have decided to go home. “Where have you been I was about to call the police to send out a search party for you” I couldn’t help but smile at the irony of her wanting to call the cops when she has two of them in her house and don’t even know it. “I’m fine mom I just lost track of time” “It’s not save to be out so late alone” “Mom I’m fine, I’m alive. Now I’m gone go shower” I heard whispers and remarks as I went upstairs “What’s biting her?” “No idea but she is moody” I didn’t bother to listen who said what I didn’t care much. I check the time; it was just after seven so I popped into the girl’s room before I went to shower.

“Hey guys” “Hey mommy” “Hi Lexi”  “It’s almost bedtime so you guys better start tiding away the toys” “But mommy” “No, buts, tomorrow is school no arguments” “Ok” “Ok mommy” I was rewarded with hugs and kisses from my two favourite girls."Is mommy always this bossy" My heart nearly came to a standstill when Anthony suddenly spoke behind me. "No mommy is the greatest" "Yes the greatest" both girls agreed I'm the greatest. "Lexi could I talk to you for a minute please" "Sure, you girls clean up and I'll be back to check in a bit ok" "Ok"  We walked into the hall way and I gestured we should talk in my room, I didn't want to take a chance of anyone over hearing us. "Are you ok?” He genuinely looked concerned. "I'm fine Anthony" "I don't believe you Lexi, if you were fine why did you disappear for so long?" I could give him the long version but that might reveal things I don’t want him to know so I’ll just give him the short almost truth.

 "Come on Ant give me a break, I didn't disappear I went for a walk. In my defense it was a bit of a shock finding out my one brother and his friend is undercover cops and their mission just happen to be my little brother. What did you expect my reaction would be" Anthony said something under his breath that sounded like curse words that I didn't want to hear. "I didn't expect Jonny to tell you that much he was just supposed to convince you to get out. “That was funny expecting Jonathan to change my mind when he couldn’t even convince me.  "Well he failed badly" "I know he told me, but he is sure we will be able to protect you" "You don't sound so confident?" He looked taken aback. "I will never let anything happen to you Alexis" "So why are we having this conversation?" "Because I want to make sure you are all right" "All things in consideration and under circumstances I’m really fine I promise" "Ok not gone argue with you" He gave me a big and just when I thought that was the end of that he whispered by my ear. “So you gone tell me what’s the deal with you and Jonathan?”

 I pulled away and looked up at him. “There is no deal” He was not buying it, I forgot how well he use to know me or still knows me. “Really so how come we can cut the atmosphere with a knife every time the two of you are close to each other.” Anthony rarely missed anything and the one thing I wished he missed he didn’t. “I’m not stupid Lexi, I can tell something happened between you two and we can spend the whole night going back and forth I’m not leaving till you tell me. ”He is impossible but I can’t tell him, can I. “There is nothing to tell.” ‘Uh Hu, you want to try again. I just want to find out which one of yours @$$*$ I want to kick first or how hard I have to hurt my best friend.” This almost had me laughing my over protected brother. If he knew the truth he will more than hurt his best friend he will most likely kill him. But I have to tell him something and I can’t lie he will know when I lie he always do.

  “It was  a long time ago Ant, its nothing really.” “it wasn’t nothing or we wouldn’t be have all the awkwardness around the two of you ” I let go of an breath I didn’t even realize I was holding. “It was bad timing, that’s all. It was just un expected to see him and all of you again after every one disappeared so suddenly. I guess after losing Sam and you gone I just didn’t expect him to leave as well” Anthony went to sit on my bed and pulled me into his lap wrapping his arms around me. Just like he use to do when I was little and I had nightmares. “I’m sorry kid we never meant to leave you.” He rested his chin on my head as I rested my head against his chest. I forgot how safe I felt in my brothers arms. “You didn’t mean for any of it to happen Ant neither you nor Sam picked your destinies that day. But John could have stayed In touch I knew he had to leave with his mom it’s just everything changed and I had no one to talk to” Anthony took his thumb and wiped a tear of my cheek  I didn’t even know I was crying. I didn’t cry at the funeral, I didn’t cry when I left my dumb @$$ husband, I didn’t cry when my life went to hell. But now I’m crying. “I’m so sorry Lex” He didn’t say anything else just held me real tight.

I must have dosed off cause the next thing I remembered was voices whispering in my room, “Is she ok?” “I hope so, she hurts a lot she cried herself to sleep.” It was Jonathan and Anthony I wanted to tell them I can hear them but decided I let them think I’m asleep and hear what else they say. “Do you think she does that a lot?” I’m sure that’s real concern I hear in Jonathan’s voice. “I dint know, I didn’t realize how badly she got hurt thru everything” “It’s not your fault man, you got locked up I should have stayed and kept an eye on her.”  Antony disagreed” You had your mom to worry about beside if you had stay you would have ended up with her and probably broke her heart. Then I had to kill you right now.” Jonathan gave a dry laugh and I heard them leave closing the door behind them. Anthony has no idea how spot on he was. I didn’t lie to him when I told him what was wrong I just kept some of the details out.

Monday morning bought the usual amount of chaos in the house getting the girls ready for school, getting ready for work. "Lexi, James will take you to work and he will borrow your car today" "Under no circumstance, let him drive his own piece of crap car."  "Alexis I already said so" "Mother, James is not gone borrow my car I'm sorry" "Alexis as your mother" She suddenly stopped talking as I turned I see Anthony standing in the door way. "Mom, Lexi is right. James should stay home for his own safety” Thanks to Anthony I got out of there quickly and without having to give James my car. Dropped the girls off at school and headed to work. I only realize when I got to work I'm thirty minutes early, I decided to get to work just to get my mind off things. Around lunch time my office phone buzzed.

“Yes Audrey what is it?" Audrey my assistant sound slightly out of breath "Your brother is in reception to see you" "Just send him to my office please" "Will do" "Thanks Audrey" I wonder which brother, maybe I should have asked her before I said send him through. Well too late now.  Moments later there is a knock on my office door "Come in" "Your brother Ms. Ross" then I realize why she sounded out of breath. Anthony was behind her and the sight of him usually left woman breathless. Seeing him thou I was sure if I should be happy or panic so I just smiled. "Thank you Audrey, please come in Anthony" "Nice girl" He said as his eyes stayed on Audrey walking away. "What are you doing here?" I could hear the panic in my voice as I close the office door. "Hey don't get up tight with me, I tried calling you but your cell just rings and rings" Only when he mentioned trying to call me I realized I left my phone at home. "Ah darn I forgot it at home sorry. So what's so important that it couldn't wait till tonight? Is something wrong?" Anthony relaxed in the arm chair opposite my desk with his hands behind his head. “Relax I just came to visit my little sister.” I have him a look that said I wasn’t buying it.

“I came to drop this off.” He put a lil device on my desk.” It’s to bug your office as a backup.” I nodded. “You still want to do this?” I knew where he was going with this so I stopped him before he could go further with that sentence. “Of cause I’m sure, it just seems so unreal like a movie.” I laughed but he didn’t find it funny. “It’s not a movie Lexi its real life and you can get real hurt.” I got up and went to give him a hug. “Relax that why I know too bad @$$ cops that gone make sure I’m real safe.” He planted the little device out of sight made a call to test it before he left he gave me a strange look, like I’m some stranger he has never seen before. "Why do you keep staring at me?" "You my little sister except you not little anymore and I missed how you went from innocent girl to this" "Aw I'm not that bad" I pouted as if he hurt my feeling and then giggled about it "It's not funny Lexi, you are doing everything we never wanted you to but you’re doing it for the right reasons. I don't know if I should be mad or proud" "Just don't be mad at me" We said goodbye and he left.

I got home greeted my mom and the girls who was helping mom cook dinner. “hi where is everyone?” “HI, they are either in your father’s study or outside with James and Dina in not too sure.” “Ok so I’m gone have a quick shower then.” I left the kitchen and headed to my room I feel like a long shower so I locked my bedroom door. I was still in the shower when I thought I heard something so I got out and rapped a towel around me to go see. I nearly had a heart attack when I saw Jonathan get out of my closet. “What the hell are you doing” He seemed just as startled as me but quickly recovered. “Your door was locked” he gestured to my door matter of fact. “I’m having a shower now what are you doing in my room.” “I had to talk to you” “It couldn’t wait till I came out, you had to climb thru my closet. “He looked back at my closet he just used to enter my room. “I was surprise you didn’t get it fixed, you still using it?” “No, it seems only jerks fit thru it.” “Ouch that hurts” I had to laugh. ”oh please nothing hurts you, now why you here I’m getting cold.” I should probably not have mentioned the las part cause that made him run his eyes over me only having a towel wrapped around me. ”Nice view” “Jonathan either tell me or get out.” He laughed then gestured towards my bathroom. “Get something clothes on Il wait here you distracting me”

I didn’t like the idea of Jonathan in my room with the door locked it brought back to many of those memories and I was not repeating past mistakes. “So what’s so important” I said as I exited the bathroom and found him lying causally on my bed with his hand behind his head eyes closed just innocently relaxing. What a sight. “James had a call from Mcklousky. He wants business taken care of tomorrow" I saw the unease on his face. "Can you do it?" "We think so, our concern is you" "Don't worry about me, I'll be fine doing my part. You just make sure we don't have a repeat of the last time" I saw hurt cross his face, “I’m sorry I didn’t mean” He held up his hand” Its ok I know what you mend.” It’s a hard subject so I tried to change it quick. ”Ok  is there anything else.” He nodded yes as he eased himself of the bed and stretched as he stood. Dam this guys has mussels everywhere. 

"So we decided we are going to put a wire on you, I  will have to do it since everyone thinks there was something between the two of us. It wouldn't seem less odd if  we spend time alone unlike you and Ant, we don't want anyone asking questions." If that was what they were thinking they weren’t wrong.  "For the sake of everything that depends on this I wouldn't argue but I'm not happy about it." He smirked "You could always not do any of this" Fat chance mister. "No that's not an option, and you know it” Still smirking he said "Can't blame a man for trying. Then I’m going to ask you out to dinner tonight, we have secured an apartment where we can go through all the details with you. Ok" that didn’t sound so bad ,I think "Ok" "Any questions?" "No I think I'm ok with it" "Lexi you really don't need to do this" I raise my hand at him suggesting he stop talking. He just shrugged his shoulders and shook his head. Neither one of us want to have that argument again we both know how it would end.  He open my bedroom door peeking thru it making sure he wasn’t spotted then left.

 

Chapter 5

I came down stairs and saw Jonathan waiting at the bottom. Oh good show time. “Lexi do you have a minute?” “Sure what is it?” He gave me his killer smile; dam him he was having way to much fun with this. “I was wondering if we could maybe go out for dinner, I know we have some issues and was wondering if we could talk about it.” I wanted to smack him, all the dam question I have to answer later just because of that. “I don’t have issues, and l’ll have to see if my mom will babysit for me" "No need I asked Em, she said its fine" "Well in that case let me just change." He nodded his head and as I turned to go upstairs I heard everyone scattered. They were clearly listening by the living room door. Good thing he came warned me beforehand. On any other day I would have told him to go straight to hell if he had asked me out, but then again on any other day he probably wouldn’t have. Im old news to him and that part still stings.

 I quickly changed did some make up, spend some time with the girls checking their homework and laying down the rules for when I'm gone. Emily told me she took the next day off and suggested we keep all the kid’s home just for a safety precaution; my parents agree so I gave in and said its fine. An hour later we left the house in Jonathan’s car. "So where exactly are we going?" "Didn't i tell you?" "you said you guys secured an apartment somewhere" "Yes it’s not that far but its save" "Ok" We didn't talk much the rest of the way there, it really wasn't that far fifteen minutes later we stopped at an abandon apartment building. I looked at the place it seems it could have been real pretty when it was first build. Jonathan led the way and unlocked one of the apartments on the second floor. It could have been a beautiful place at one stage now it is dark smell musty and has a simple couch, table and 2 chairs in one side laid a mattress and that was about it.

"It’s not first class accommodation but it will do for what we need it to" I just nodded. "You ok?" He looked about as uncomfortable as I felt. "Yes I'm fine" I was trying real hard to convince myself that I was fine. "You don't look all that fine" "Can we just do this and get it over with" "Sure, so did Ant explain the wire to you when he went to bug your office?" "No he really didn’t even mention it" He held up a little mini microphone barely bigger than his thumb attach to a wire. "I'm going to tape this to you tomorrow morning, it will record everything you and anyone close to you says" "Ok, and Mcklousky wouldn’t know?" "No, he has no reason to suspect you of anything so he would notice as long as you stay cool and calm" "Sounds easy enough" "Lexi, you are very brave for doing this" I looked up straight into those piercing blue eyes and saw real concern in them "Don't do that John please" "Do what?" "Look at me like that" "Like what Lexi?" "Like this is the last time you going to see me, or like I'm sacrificing myself here. I have full faith in you and my brother that nothing is gone go wrong"  "We are going to do everything in our power, we have two teams situated close to your work to take him down the minute we have the evidence we need." "What if he doesn't give anything away?" "He will have to if he wants the claim to go through without a problem" "Ok so nothing to worry about then" I was starting to feel slightly nervous. "Let's hope not." "Gee John you do wonders to reinsure me" "No point kidding around Lexi you know the risk here" "I know, so what now?" He was safely returning the device back to its little box. "Well we have some time to kill before we need to go back, we can't be too quick. So we could hang out here or we could go get something to eat. What do you want to do?"

 I really didn’t want to risk being seen anywhere with Jonathan Pirelli. The gossip and rumors not to mention all the questions will be just too much. "Can we hang out here and get something to eat. I don't feel like going out but I am hungry “he seemed relieve at my suggestion. “Sure let me just make a call" He phoned someone, I suspect it had to be another cop or someone told them to bring us something to eat and then hang up. The silence was hanging in the air for a bit neither of us sure what to say then he finally broke it. "So how long have you been divorced?" Almost nine years." "How old is Megan?" "Almost nine years"  "Dam girl how long where you married?" "I was married eight months and he left two months before Megan was born, he has never been around she doesn't know him and she wouldn't" I don’t mean to but I do get very defensive  every time the topic of my ex-husband comes up. "Ok don't bite my head off I was just asking" "I know, I'm sorry. So what about you?" I decide it might be safer to turn the conversation on him rather than me. "What about me?" "Did you decide to settle down or are you still the same heart breaking player you always were?"

There it was I finally said what I have been thinking since he walked back into my life three days ago, and some emotion crossed his face briefly. "No I didn't settle down, and I never mend to hurt you" There was a knock on the door which interrupted his sentence.  I sat and watch him pull his gun from his holster open the door and then relax and put the gun away. He looked back at me then talked to whoever was on the other side after a few minutes he closed the door and I could smell the pizza he had in his hands now along with two tins of cold drink. "They got us pizza I hope that is fine" "It’s perfect"      We ate for a while then it was my turn to break the silence. "You could have said bye" for a moment he looked lost as if he didn't understand what I said then he finally got it. "I know, and I should have" "So why didn't you, it was all I wanted" "I don't know, you know me goodbyes aren’t really my thing" "Yeah I know, breaking hearts are more your thing" "I suppose I deserve that, although you where the one girl I didn't mean to hurt you." "Oh please John you expect me to believe I was different than anyone of the other girls?" "Yes you where, and I told you that back then. You were different and that's why you should never have gotten involved with me. what happened between us shouldn’t have happened" he seemed sincere about and I couldn’t help but wonder if he thought I was some huge mistake. “If I was so different why did I get treated the same? But you right I guess that the one thing we can agree up on is I shouldn’t have gotten involved with you" As I said the words I knew they were not true but there is no way I was gone admit that to him. 

 We finish eating cleared the stuff then head back home. "In order for me to see you alone tomorrow morning to wire you, we have to pretend this date has gone well" "I know" "So you don’t pull away when I kiss you?" "Can we do it in the dark so it looks like you kiss me without actually having to kiss me?" I could see that hurt his feeling but I was past caring I just wanted this to be over. "I'm sure we can pull that off" "Good"  I saw the curtain move as we pulled into the driveway, I know we would be watched, even if I wanted to back out of this fake kiss I knew I couldn't. Making sure no one knew about Anthony and Jonathan being under cover depended on us making everyone believe we had a good date. "Let's get this over with" Jonathan just look at me with a smirk on his face like this is harder for me than for him. No real surprise since he faked every relationship he ever had.He opened the car door for me just like a real gentleman. Helped me out and stood in front of me, close enough so no one could see what we were really doing. I held my breath "Relax Lex its dark they can't see." He rested his arm above my head against the car and rested his head on his arm; he was so close I felt his breathing against my ear. “Knowing I hurt you is killing me more than you will ever now. It was supposed to be the right thing for you” He whispered the word so soft it was barely audible. I just looked up at him, his eyes was close. For a while we just stood like that then he finally moved away.

in an second he was back to his old self and back to business  taking my hand he and not looking at me  he said "I think that should be long enough to convince them we were making out" I just nodded I didn't have the energy to speak. I followed him into the house.  Everyone was pretending to be asleep when we walked in, not realizing I saw them peeking through the window. It was a relief thou I didn't feel like discussing the night with anyone. After I thanked Jonathan I went upstairs as quickly and quietly as I could. I needed distance between us a lot of it maybe a few states of distance or even a country will do too. I got in the shower and just stood there until the water turned cold; I keep thinking something is wrong. Its as if there is something he want to tell me but then rethinks it every time. He gets this look in his eyes and just goes quit. I’m positive he is hiding something 

Chapter 6

"Good morning sunshine" I opened my eyes slowly and saw Jonathan standing next to my bed "What do you want? What time is it?" "Its four  and I want you to wake up get dress so I can put this on before everyone ells wakes up we are supposed to leave at four thirty " He was holding the wire in his hand, of cause how could I forget I needed to be wired. I got up, he wired me and I got dressed “I'll see you down stairs, don't fiddle with that thing" "I would promise" I held my hands up as to make my words more trust worthy. He slipped out of my room and I quickly fixed my hair and makeup before heading down stairs for breakfast.  "Morning sleepy head glad you could join us" I didn’t feel like this morning. "Morning Ant" I gave my brother a hug and he gave me a reassuring smile. Father joined us and went through everything one last time.

"Ok Alexis you will go to work and carry on as normal. We will be ready to commandeer the vehicles at five am just before the neighborhood gets up and going, Jonny will be look out and distract any unnecessary visitors. Mike Mc will be notified as soon as the security makes the discovery, report the incident and file the claim shortly after. Alexis will handle the claim just like any other and approve it without any trouble. Any question?" We all just shook our heads. "Good let's get to work" They all left the kitchen, I had some time to spare since it’s a while before I had to leave so I took my coffee and went to sit on the porch. “Need some company?” I looked up and saw Emily standing in the door. “Sure it’s a while before I leave.” She came to sit next to me her whole demeanor was tense and stressed out; I couldn’t say I blamed her inside I was freaking out.

 “Tell me this is not gone be like last time” I looked at her, I couldn’t really say how it was gone be I knew there was gone be cops and I knew it wasn’t gone go down exactly as they planned it but I couldn’t tell her that. So I smiled “it’s gone be ok Em, everything will work out.” She looked at me “You scared I can tell” “I think we all are, considering the last time everything went to hell and I lost most of my family. I suppose I am scared in a way.” I squeezed her hand then went to say bye to the kids and  headed for the front door to leave for work. As I reach my car my phone peep signaling a message from Jonathan. "Hey relax, it will all be ok Lex, you can do this and we have surveillance teams all over. Don't worry we wouldn’t repeat history" I quickly replied "I'm not worried about me, I'm worried about you guys" "Don't worry about us we know what we are doing"

 For the first time since I agreed to be part of this I'm scared. I don't know if I'm scared for me, or scared that something might go wrong just like it did the last time they did this. Maybe I'm scared it all goes well and everyone know Jonathan and Anthony are cops, what then. I haven't even though about how my family would react to that. Will my parents be ok with it, and what if they have to arrest James? My mother will not be happy with that. How they were planning on taking down Mcklousky I didn’t know either but none of it could be good. Was keeping this to my self really the best idea, probably not but old habits die hard and keeping secrets has always seem like the one thing I do really well.

 I got to work fifteen minutes earlier than usual and decided to send Jonathan a message. "Hi let me know when all goes well so I don't worry please". I barely send the message when I got his reply message. "I will and don't worry it will be over before you know it." I really hope you right, I thought to myself. For a brief second I thought about what was going to happen when this was all over but I squished the thought just as quick as it came into my head. I didn’t want to think about that right now.  I kept myself busy all morning trying not to think about it. Just after lunch time my phone buzzed "Yes Audrey" "Ms. Ross there is a Mr Mcklousky here he would like to file a claim personally. I was told to send him to you, he is high priority." "That's fine Audrey you can send him in" I was surprise at how calm I sounded since I could hear my heart pounding. "You can do this" I told myself as I straightened myself to meet with my high profile client.

  "Mr Mcklousky, I'm Alexis Ross how can I be of assistance?"  "Ms. Ross, how lovely to meet you. I would like to put in a claim I have had some misfortune this morning" "I am so sorry to hear that, please come sit then I can assist you. Can I get you something to drink."  “No thanks I’m hopping this wouldn’t take too long” He said as He took his seat across from my desk. “That will be all thank you Audrey” I closed the door and composed myself the best I could. I acted every bit the professional insurance consultant that I was. "Your misfortune may I acquire as to what it was" "Let's cut the formalities Ms. Ross, I have other places to be, I'm here to be seen. Now you know I had your brother steal my vehicles and I'm sure you have my paperwork ready so just tell me where to sign" I handed him the paper work and he signed each of the documents. This guy gave me the creeps why would anyone do business with someone so vial. After he signed the last document he looked at me regarding me closely. “you know” he said "You are much prettier in person, you tell your brother to be sure he keeps up his end of our arrangement or else I will be forced to pay you another visit. Now we don't want anything to happen to this pretty face do we?" As he said it he stroke my cheek and I had to try very hard not to throw up. He got up walked to the door turned. “Till we meet again Ms. Ross" and left.

 I didn't reply I was frozen where I was sitting I couldn't move, couldn't think I wasn't even sure I could breath. This monster of a man just threatened me.  I heard my cell phone ring but it only registered in my mind after the third ring "Hello" My voice was horse and I was shaking. "Lexi are you ok?" "I'm fine Ant, I think" "Did Mcklousky leave?" "Yes he is gone" "Lexi you don't sound ok did that creep touch you or hurt you" "I'm ok Ant, did your guys get the conversation" "Yes they did, you did well princess. Do you want me to come fetch you?" I took a couple of breaths. "No, no it’s fine I'm ok really. How about you guys are everyone ok, Jonathan never let me know." He hesitated for a second "We are fine; Mcklousky didn't give us time to let you know sorry" "you don’t sound too sure Ant?” “Everyone is fine ok, and if you are sure you are ok I have to go.”” I’m sure” “I’ll see you tonight" then he hung up.  I decided to let the un easy feeling go after all he said everyone was ok so I went back to work and filling the claim as quick as I can.

 About two hours later my phone buzz again "Yes Audrey" "The boss would like to see you" "Which boss?" "The big boss Mr. Smith" "Oh dear, did he say why?" "No just said he want to see you immediately" "Ok I’m on my way" Great just what I need a meeting with the big boss, I wonder what it is about, and suddenly that sick feeling in my stomach was back. Moments later I was standing outside my boss’s office his pa said I can just go in, but I need a few seconds of deep breathing. I knocked once then entered, "Mr. Smith, you wanted to see me?" He looked up from some papers on his desk he was going over "Yes Ms. Ross please come in" He gestured for me to sit and I did nervously "You handled a claim this morning Mr. Mcklousky, you marked it as urgent. Why?" Oh crap, my heart started pounding and I could feel my blood run cold. I had to keep it together I couldn't blow this not now. “Ms Ross Im waiting” I snapped out of it “Sorry sir” he looked irritated “Why urgent Ms Ross?” “Oh because Mr. Mcklousky is one of our very important clients sir he insures a great deal with us, and when he took time this morning to come in personally I thought it be a nice gesture on our part to handle his claim as quickly as possible" He looked down at the paper work again "I see, well Ms. Ross that was very cleaver thinking. I’m sure you went over all of this and made sure it was all in order” he said as he pointed to the papers work he was holding. “Yes sir” I couldn’t believe how nervous I was and silently I said a prayer that it will all be ok. “Very well then, you can phone your client and tell him we will settle his claim today, his money should be available within an hour." What wow I couldn’t believe it. "I will do that, thank you sir" "Thank you Ms. Ross" I left his office and got back to mine as soon as I could.

 I sat down and realized I was shaking and I really wanted to throw up. I told Audrey to phone Mr Mcklousky I didn't have the stomach to talk to him again. After I regained my good senses I decided to send Anthony a message and let him know what my boss said, I wasn’t sure if they were still listening on the wire. It was almost three pm just over an hour to go before this day will be over. I was still busy typing the message when my cell phone rang. I frightened the day lights out of me and I dropped the phone, I answered   not bothering to check the caller I'd as I picked it up from my desk. "Hello" "Lexi where are you?" "Hi mom, I'm at the office now. Why, what's wrong?" "Just get home as soon as you can" "Mom what is it? Did something happen?" "Just hurry" She hanged up before I could say another word. For the third time today I felt my blood go ice cold and my heart rate racing. I automatically and immediately dialed Anthony. "Hi you have reach the mail box off Anthony Ross please leave a message and I'll get back to you" "Dam it Anthony, where are you? Phone me" I hanged up and phoned Jonathan but his phones just kept on ringing no answer either. Something was wrong and I had to get home fast.  I beeped Audrey “Yes Ms. Ross” “I will be out of the office for the rest of the day please takes all my massages.” “Very well Ms. Ross” I gathered all my stuff and just short of ran out the office.

 

Chapter 7

I drove like a maniac to get home, lucky for me there were no traffic officers to give me a ticket for the stop signs I skipped. All the way home I kept trying to get hold of Anthony or Jonathan but neither of them was answering their phones. Antony said everything went well so what was wrong now. Not bother to lock my car, I ran up the pathway to the porch, it was good to know I can still run in heels and not break my dam neck. Emily had the door open before I got to it. "Hi Em, where's mom? What happened?" "You better get in here" Closing the door behind me I turn to Emily "What the hell is going on? Mom sounded stress and very frantic" Emily looked like she had seen a ghost. “Did anyone get hurt?”  "No, no one got hurt, um something just happened and it’s not good “I was getting very frustrated. "Oh for crying out loud just tell me already "Emily looked like she didn’t know where to start so she just blurted out. "It turned out Anthony was an undercover cop and they arrested James" Oh crap this was it. "Where is Vince? “ She looked at me odd as if I didn’t hear her. "I'm not sure, he send me a message saying he is fine but I don't know where he is" "Ok as long as he is fine" She shook her head "Alexis didn't you hear me, Anthony is a cop. He arrested James, mom is freaking out"

 I took a deep breath squeezed her hand and assured her I heard her "I heard you Em, where is dad" She looked even more confused "Calming mom down, making calls to see if he can get James out." Shaking my head in agreement I asked another important to me question that she didn’t seem to find as important "Where are the kids" "They are visiting my mother.” Finally she snapped. ”Why aren't you freaked out about Anthony?" I understood her confusion but wasn’t sure what to tell her. "Why should I be?" I shrug my shoulders and at that moment "You knew!" We looked up at my mother as she all but yelled the words, her words was an accusation. I quickly asses that the situation was very tense and I didn’t want to worsen it so instead of agreeing I tried a different tactic

"Hi mom" "Do not hi me Alexis” She said each word slow and clear as she moved close towards me, and Emily retreating to a corner like a scared child. ”did you know your brother was a cop?" I could deny it, but lying to my mother was never on my list of strong point and I didn’t see any point in starting now “Is a cop mom" "Alexander get in here now" I knew she was mad when she used my father’s full name to call him. "What is it? I was on the phone with the lawyer" "She knew, my baby is in jail and she knew" My mother didn't look at me just gestured with her hands; my father looked from my mother to me. I tried to calm the situation. "Mom it’s going to be alright" She looked at me as if I was her worst enemy “How will this ever be alright, Anthony betrayed this family. His own flesh and blood and you knew. You" before she could finish the front door opened behind me.

 Looking at my mother’s face I didn't need to turn around and look to know it was Anthony. "You, where is my baby?" "Mom please calm down and let me explain" "Do not tell me to calm down, you arrested your brother your own flesh and blood how could you stoop so low" Vincent walked in behind Antony and put his arms around his wife who visible relaxed. My mother turned to Vincent “Did you know as well?” Anthony answered instead.  ”No he didn’t know mother” My mother looked from Antony to me and back to him with disgust "So only her” “Mom” Anthony started to say but she held up her hand. ”No get out; you are no child of mine" Finally my  father stepped in. "Lauren that's enough." My mother looked at my father with complete shock and so did the rest of us. "Give him a chance to explain" "Alexander, Don't you care about my baby, that poor girl in there" When my mother pointed to the living room I only realized I never even asked if Dina was ok. My father shook his head, “Screaming will not result this, we will give Anthony a change to explain and that is final” At my father looked and Anthony he was clearly as upset about this secret as my mother was but unlike mother my father always kept a level head in all situations. "Mother James is fine, he is in custody for his own protection" I had to hand it to Anthony he was much calmer than what I would have been in his situation, even in my own I want to scream right now. "Everything is going to be alright mom" Mother just stared at Anthony “You can’t be trusted” was all she said. Anthony gave up on mother and turned his attention to my father. “With James arrested Mcklousky wouldn’t think of him as the traitor and will leave him alone.”  My father seemed to agree with that, ‘Why didn’t you tell us?” He wanted to know as we all moved into the living room to sit down, I decided Ill rather stand close to the door it might be safer. Anthony continued as we entered the living room “We have been after Mcklousky for a while we know he does more than just insurance scams but he is very sneaky so we can’t get anything to stick. We knew if we can get him on insurance scam we can make the rest stick so when the job came up we assembled a team to go after it. Instead James went after it as well I tried to talk him out of it warning him how dangerous Mcklousky is but he wouldn’t listen. I couldn’t tell him we were after Mcklousky James would have blown the whistle and a lot of innocent people would have paid the price.” We all listened it all made sense to me and Vincent and Emili seem to agree but the rest was just getting madder the more he explained. The only other person talking was my father everyone else was dead quite. “So what happens to James now?” Anthony looked at my mother first carefully before he answered. “If he turns state witness and testify against Mcklousky he walks” “And if he doesn’t he goes down as coconspirator” my father finished for him. Anthony just shook his head. No one said anything while my father thought it over, finally he asked the obviouse question.”you told James” “Jonathan is currently exsplaining his options to him” My mother snorted “those aren’t options”.  Finally after Anthony finished my mother looked at me. "How long did you know?" I looked at Anthony and he winked at me so I answered. "That Anthony is a cop? Since John got here" I figured I might as well tell them, it is bound to come out sooner or later. "How did you know and no one ells?" "John told me" Anthony wanted to say something but she wouldn't allow him to talk. She was cold and cruel towards him in her tone of voice and not much friendlier with me.  As much as I love my mother she was going too far. She was over reacting and I was moments away from telling her. "I can't believe you would keep something like that a secret, have you no loyalty to your family?"At that Anthony just about lost it, we grew up with loyalty and he wasn’t going to let my mother question where my loyalty lied. "It’s my fault I told Lexi she can't tell anyone" My mother snapped at him. "I'm not talking to you"I couldn’t take any of this anymore. "Mother that's enough" I almost screamed the words at her. I know I was about to cross a line that I shouldn't but I didn't care my mother was wrong. "Anthony did what he did to protect this family, why are we getting your cold speech while James is the one who put this family in danger. All you care about is James, what about me that got threatened today by Mcklousky. I risk my dam job and life but all you care about is James. And he had a chance out of this. If I didn't know any better I would say he and Amanda are all you care about. Why is that mother don't tell me Sam was his father too" The words was out before I could stop them and I realized to late what I have said. My mother slapped me across my face, making my cheek sting. "I'm am your mother and you do not dare speak to me that way, get out of my house now" I didn’t hesitate for one second."Fine by me" I heard Emily gasp, Dina stopped sobbing and I felt rather than see Anthony stand behind me. I turned around grabbed my bag and head for the door. I heard my father call after me and my mother telling him to let me go. I didn’t care where I was going. Outside I head for my car I can't believe I just did that I just wanted to get out of there. "Lex wait" Anthony ran to catch up with me"What Anthony" I snapped I didn’t mean to but I was at breaking point and I had about as much as I could take. "Are you still wearing the wire?" My hand automatically reached for my chest. Oh no the wire. Anthony pulled me to the back of the house and into the shed where he removed the wire. "Are you ok" I nodded. I didn't want to speak all I could think about was what just happened, what I just said and it is all recorded on this dam wire. How could I have forgotten that I was wearing it. This means Jonathan hear what I said, did he know about his brother and my mother or that Amanda was his brother’s kid. Did anyone know? Anthony switched  the wire off then asked me. "Is it true what you said about Amanda?" Anthony's question made me realize maybe nobody knew. “I didn’t mean to say it" Anthony shook his haed in agreement he knew I wouldn’t do something like that. “I have to go Ant, and you need to sort out this thing with James" I didn’t give him time for any more questions. I rushed out of the shed got in my car and went straight to Emily's mother I had to go pick up Megan and Amanda. Then I will decide where to go, but for now I'm not going back to my parents’ house. Maybe we will spend the night at my apartment. I haven't been there since I moved back to my parents to help out, and it really wasn't that far. Just on the other side of town, but it was safe quiet and no one knew about it.      I picked the girls up.”What do you guys say about some Mc Donalds for supper and maybe some movies too.” “Awesome can we get ice-cream aswell?” I smiled at the two of them “Ofcause we’ll get ice-cream.”  I stopped by Mc Donald’s picked up dinner and ice-cream and rented two dvd's of their choice. "Mommy where are we going this isn’t the way home? " Megan was the first to notice we were heading in a different direction. "I thought we could go have a sleep over at a surprise place" “Cool a surprised place”Amanda said “And we get to sleep over, but we don’t have a sleep over bag” Megan reminded me.”Its part of the surprise”It was lame but it was the best I could come up with and it seems to work. It  had them excited immediately. I took the long way to the other side of town making sure I wasn't being followed by any family or police. I pulled into the undercover parking and we took the stairs to the top floor of the three story brick building.  The apartment wasn't something spectacular. It was a simple fully furnished two bedroom, two bathroom apartment in a quite complex. No one seemed to have notice us arriving and with the undercover parking my car can't be spotted. “This is a very nice place mom, who lives here?” Amanda was checking out the place but Megan always had all the questions. “We are looking after it for a friend of mine, now you two will be sharing this bedroom with the bathroom across from it. Would you like to eat n here while you watch your movie?” “Yes please.” Both girls said. I gave them their food and ice-cream and settled them in what is supposed to have been Megan's bedroom if we were to life here. I decided to relax on the oversize couch with a book. Maybe we will get to live here after all especially now with all the drama. Chapter 8  It was past ten pm the girls was fast asleep, when there was a knock at the door. No one knew about this place, and I was sure no one saw us come in. I took my gun from my bag check the magazine and cock it. I didn’t  know  who it could be, and I wasn’t  willing to take any chances. I closed the passage door that lead to the bedroom and hooked the chain on the front  door as I unlocked it. With the gun in my hand, the chain on I open the door. "What the.....? What are you doing here? And how did you find me?" "I'm a cop Lexi, it’s not that hard. Are you going to let me in?"  "Are you alone?"  "Yes"  "Does anyone know where you are?" "Cum on , No, I didn't tell anyone and no one know where I am. Now let me in please" I close the door, unhooked the chain and open the door. Gun still loaded in my hand just in case. His expression changed when he stepped inside and saw the gun in my hand.  "A gun? I didn't know you owned a gun" I smirk "Would you please keep your voice down Jonathan, you will wake the girls." He shook his head as if he’s not believing what he is seeing. "You know your mother opened a kidnapping case against you" I laughed "Are you serious?" He didn’t seem to find it amusing. "Yes she said you kidnapped Amanda" Suddenly my mood soured even more "That's just great, I've been raising that kid for the last how many years now I've kidnapped her. My mother must grow up" Jonathan looked around the apartment  "Where are they" I followed his gaze and then turned defensive  "They're asleep and if you came here to arrest me or to take Amanda you can leave because I will shoot you" Jonathan raised his hand as to surrender  moving  into the living room. "Don't shoot I came here to talk to you” I regarded him for a second then relaxed. I put the gun in the waist band of my pants just in case I needed to use it on him or if someone followed him. I got us each a soda from the fridge then returned to the living room. "You want to talk to me so talk I'm listing" He was a bit on edge like he wasn’t sure if he could trust me and if I would really kill him. "Did you put your gun away" This made me smile he really thinks I would shoot him HA! "My gun is save don't let it bother you. Now why did you come here Jonathan" He didn’t look at me instead he was sitting on the edge of the couch his head in his hands and his elbows on his knees. He wanted answers but he didn’t know if he was ready for them. "You know why Lex" He was right I did know, he wanted to know about Amanda but where to start.  We were silent for a long time, looking everywhere but at each other. Finally he broke the silence. "Is it true?" I looked up at him, those piercing blue eyes studying me. I nodded then add "I didn't mean to say it John, I forgot I had the wire on. I was upset, you shouldn't have found out like that." I was rambling on not sure what to say to him. "I'm glad you did" "What? You're not mad?" He started relaxing a bit. "I was, I was mad and upset. I wanted to kill you earlier for your indiscretion. I never knew and then I found out with my whole squad listening. I looked like an idiot.” He got up walk to the window and I could tell he was getting upset all over again. “It wasn’t my intentions” What else could I say I couldn’t exactly take it back. “I thought you did in on purpose to get back at me for hurting you” was he serious how could he think that I would something so mean. “When I got to your house and you weren’t there Anthony said you left and no one know where you. All they knew was you picked the girls up and disappeared.” I just looked at him what did he want from me. “I didn’t do it on purpose John I couldn’t hurt you like that.” “You could have told me Lex” I shook my head no, I couldn’t look at him. “It wasn’t my secret to keep I couldn’t tell you just like I couldn’t tell them you and Anthony where cops.” This he seemed to understand and he came to sit down opposite me again. “I should have realized that I was just really mad at you. I suppose I was just hurt or something for not knowing" I looked at him "So you still mad?" He smile that million dollar smile "Not at you, at least I don’t think so" I blew out a big breath "That's a relieve." He looked at me puzzled then smiled. "You don't like me mad at you?" I cocked my eyebrow was he serious "I don't like you mad period John, you a little scary when you mad" this made him smile his biggest thousand watt smile yet "Right back at you Ms. Ross, I didn't know you could get mad but it’s scary. As is seeing you with a gun."  He shook his head in disbelieve.  We both relaxed after that. “Can I ask you about it, her, the whole thing?” I didn’t really want to talk about this now. “Do we have to this now after the day we had?” He didn’t answer me. “Yes she is really your nice and yes your brother really did sleep with my mother or the other way around it doesn’t really matter to me. But no I don’t feel like talking about it.” I let out a breath he got up came to sit next to me gave me hug and said. “Ok” That was it, just ok. He didn’t let go of me so I rested my head on his shoulder and when I felt him relax so did I. “Are you going to tell your mother” I had to know. “I don’t know, part of me says she has a right to know she has a granddaughter and part of me wonders how she will react.” I knew he was right about Beth having the right to know, “Amanda doesn’t know.” He shook his head in acknowledgement then added. “Don’t you think she should know?” I looked straight at him “She is ten, how would you like me to explain to a ten year old that the only person she ever knew as her father isn’t her father. Her father is a really dead.” “I get that she is just a kid but she should know and so should my mother.” I was starting to get angry he has no right to upset Amanda’s life. “You don’t have the right to upset her life just cause your brother couldn’t keep it in his pants.” I saw the veins in his neck start to pulse faster. “My brother your mother seduced him.” This was probably true. “It doesn’t really matter who did who back than what matter is Amanda…” he wouldn’t let me finish when he interrupted my sentence “What matter is the truth Alexis and the truth is Amanda isn’t your fathers kid as she should know as should my mother for crying out loud it’s all she has left of Sam.” This struck a nerve, if it was Anthony or Vincent I would’ve wanted to know and get to the kid just because it’s a part of them that lives on. I lowered my head I wasn’t going to let him see that he struck a nerve, and I didn’t want him seeing the unwanted tears that was making their way to the surface. I swore long ago no man will ever see me cry not even if it’s because I miss my dear friend. “Do what you want Jonathan.” I get up but he grabs my hand and pulls me back. “Hey I didn’t come here to fight.” I don’t turn around to face him or answer him. “Lex?” He moves around to stand in front of me he gently lifts my chin so I could face him. “S@#t” he curses when I finally look up at him. “Dam baby doll I didn’t mean to upset you I really didn’t come here to fight.” “You not the only who lost someone John and you not the only one who misses Sam.” He pulls me into his arms and rest his chin on my head. “I know baby doll” I wish he would stop saying that dam nick name. “Its just the years without Sam haven’t been good to my mother, and to find out a part of him still lives…” he trails off not finishing his sentence. I can hear his voice breaking slightly, its hard to talk about Sam I don’t think anyone really has. I don’t look up at him instead I talk into his chest as I put my arms around his waist. “Maybe Amanda should know, I just think we should deal with one problem at a time.” He doesn’t say anything just holds me. When he finally speaks he is so serious it’s almost scary. “When this is over, I will give you time to explain it to her. I am going to tell my mother so don’t take to long.” He tenses up as he says is, waiting for my reply. I break away from him but not completely I take his hand and pull him back to the couch we were sitting on the tension is to much. I don’t like him like this all serious and scary. “Fine I will make sure she knows.” He considers my words. “You not gone tell her?” I shake my head “Its not my place I’m not her mother.” “What if your mother wouldn’t?” I smile at him, “If she knows you are going to tell your mother, she will trust me.” He shakes his head but doesn’t say anything else. He pulls me closer again and I relax.Looking around the apartment for a change in conversation. "This is a nice place, why don't you live here?" I didn’t bother lifting my head to answer him "I meant to, I used the money I got from the divorce to buy it but I moved in with my parents to help out for a little while. That kind of became permanent."  "So you never thought about moving here?" I look around thinking about it “Not until earlier this evening, in truth I have never even told anyone about this place it was kind of like my save house for me and Megan". He looks concerned “Did you ever need to use it?" "Not until today" I shrug and he nodded. “How did you find it?” I was very curious to know, I wasn’t lying when I said I never told anyone about this place. ”I told you I’m a cop, plus I might have had this habit of keeping an eye on you. I knew when you bought the place but was surprised that you didn’t stay here” He kissed the top of my head. This was too much confusion for me.I sat up and turned to face him. “What the hell John” He looked at me confused “Did I say something wrong now?” “How about everything, you left without a good buy get back trust me with your secret, act like you care about me. Now you tell me you have been keeping tabs on me why. “He quietly considers my words, and then looks hurt when he finally replies “it wasn’t an act, I thought you knew that.” He took a steady breath then continued. ”I tried not to check up on you but I just couldn’t ever get you off my mind.” I can’t believe I’m hearing this. “You shouldn’t have loved me Lex” He said the last part so soft it was bearly more than a wispers “if I had control over it I probably wouldn’t” I smiled and got up.  "Listen John it’s getting late, it’s been a really long day. You can sleep on the couch if you want but I'm going to bed" "Lex" He took my wrist and pulled me to him as I stood to walk out. As we stood face to face he ran his knuckles over my cheek. "Are you ok? I mean after today, that guy your boss all the drama" I gave him my best attempt at a smile "Im ok really" "I'm sorry you had to go through that Lex" he was being so sincere  I reached up kissed him on the cheek. "Thanks for being here John" Then left the living room before this turned into something it wasn't. "Mommy! Mommy! Wake up" "What?" "Wake up mommy uncle Jonny is making pancakes" "Yes he said we must wake you up, wake up Lexi" "Ok, ok I'm awake" Half walking, half being dragged I make my way to the kitchen and the delicious smell of pancakes and a very sexy half naked Jonathan making them. "Good morning" he said with a boyish grin and his still wet from the shower hair. "Morning what time is it?" "It’s just past eight." "Eight! Dam it I'm gone be late" "Relax I already phoned your office and said you wouldn't be coming in now sit and have a pancake" Now he’s just being arrogant, but since I’m really in no mood to go to work today I will let it go for now. “Sit next to me mommy" "Thanks, and thanks for this" I gestured towards the pancakes "Didn't know I had stuff here to make it" "You didn’t, I picked it up when I went for my morning run. Routine stuff" he winked at the routine stuff so I figure he was checking the area out. I decided not to dwell on that. "Wow I'm impressed. When did you learn to cook?" He made an offended face and then hit back with. "I'm a bachelor Lex and cooking really impresses the girls" He winked and I just laughed.  After breakfast I offered to  clean up while the girls went to brush their teeth and change into the emergency clothes I had for Megan. I hope they find something that fits I haven't change the clothes in two seasons. I was still thinking about the clothes when Jonathan pulled me from my day dreaming. "Hello anyone there?"  "Um sorry yes, what?" He laughed "I asked what happens now" I thought about it for a second I want to go get back into bed, sleep and when I wake up this was all a bad dream. A very bad dream cause in reality Jonathan isn’t supposed to half naked in my kitchen. I shake the thought as quick as it popped into my head. No. I wanted to say we could start by you putting on clothes but I don’t want him to know that he affects me at all. "Oh, well I suppose I have to go face the mess I made" "Do you want me to come with?" "Well I would be nice to have a cop there to keep me out of handcuffs"  gave me a devious  smile "I can think of a different scenario of you in hand cuffs rather than out of them" I made a shocked face. Was he being serious "That's not funny John”  “I know its sexy” we both laughed then he turned serious. “I’m serious Lex I saw you're gun and heard your temper yesterday. I can’t keep you out of cuffs if you actually kill someone"  I put my hand over his mouth “Would you shush about the G.U.N. no one know about that." He pulled back a little "Wow, you look so innocent and yet you have so many secrets. I don't even think I know you"  "That's because you don't know me, and I never claimed to be innocent" I heard the girls arguing in the room and left to go sort them out. It was after ten when we left. We decided to go in his car and leave mine hidden in the garage. Although suddenly that don’t seem like it was such a good idea what if I want to leave. He must off sense my saddened hesitation cause he put his hand on my knee and squeezed it. When I look up at him he just smiled and mouthed. “You ok?” I want to say no, not even close but I’m not showing any weakness around this guy not even facing my family. He left and I had to learn to be strong on my own and I will be strong now. So I just smiled and whispered “I’m fine” He parked in the street and not in the drive way. "You ready" "As I’ll ever be “I said with a fake smile. Something told me he didn’t buy it, but I wasn’t going to hold on to that he doesn’t know me so he wouldn’t know when I lie and when my smiles is fake. "I'm here Lex nothing gone happen" I let the girls run ahead. Jonathan took my hand and hold it tight. I tried to pull it free but he wouldn’t let me. Wow maybe he does care. "Where have you been" Here we go the drama that’s our family "I thought you told me to go mom" I’m probably looking for trouble baiting my mom but I’m kind of past the point of caring right now. "Don't you get smart with me, I was worried sick" I was about to say something stupid and start a new fight, but John squeezed my hand and I swallowed my words. "I'm sorry mom."  "Leave it now Lauren, they save and home" Trust my father to be the one trying to keep the peace. “HI dad" "I sweet heart, please don't scare us like that again" I felt like laughing they never acted like they cared why now but I wasn’t going to start on that so I decided to take an easy out. "I wouldn't" My father looked at Jonathan holding my hand and I saw a strange look cross his face, somewhere between anger, disappointment and definite disapproval. He can’t possibly have anything against Jonathan he was the one that asked Antony to get him here. So why is this bothering him. "Lexy don’t you want to go make us something to drink please, and Jonny can I talk to you in private" My father didn’t wait for an answer from me just gestured for Jonathan to follow him into his study which he did. Now a good girl would do as her father asked but I never claimed to be a good girl. so instead of going into the kitchen and fix the drinks, I slip out and crouch under the study window. "What do you think you are doing?" My father was trying to keep his voice down but he was yelling at John, which by his tone of voice I can tell he was trying to keep his calm. "What are you talking about Alex?" My father snorted "You know exactly, you and Alexis. I thought I made it clear cant date my daughter. Have you forgotten?" Jonathan sounded appalled "No I haven't forgotten. How could I forget, that was why you made me leave town remember" "it was what was best for everyone you agreed to that. Did you tell her?" "Of cause I didn't tell her. You can relax Alex, Alexis made it pretty clear just how much she hates me. This whole thing is make believe so I can keep my cover and she can help her brother"  I heard my father pacing behind his desk. “You sure you didn’t tell her anything, Alexis is my life I’m not losing my daughter.” Jonathan was getting irritated. “I said I wouldn’t say a thing but I think she should know.” “No never, you gave your word.” Without another word I heard my fathers office door open and close and a few minutes later I heard the front door slam shut.  Chapter 9  I couldn't take it anymore. More secrets, more lies I don’t even know if anything in this family is true. "Mom I'm going for a walk I should be back in fifteen minutes" I needed to get out I felt betrayed and hurt even more now than ten years ago. "Ok, don't be as long as last time" "I wouldn't" I headed out the door and fall into a run. I needed to clear my head and running seems to work. As I turned the corner I ran straight into trouble. Two of men was watching our house and decided to grab me and stuffed me into the trunk of their car. Oh crap now I'm in trouble, they must be working for Mclousky why else would they want to grab me. "Don't freak out" I told myself. I felt around me and found something thin with a point I was guessing a screwdriver but wasn’t sure. I clutched it tight I didn’t know what I was going to do but im sure it would come to me. When we finally stop  I braiced myself as soon as the truck opend I swang my arm and jammed the object into the person that open it. “ Stupid b@#$ stabbed me.” Another guy hauled me out and I was kicking and screaming. Then everything was out.       When I came to it was dark outside and I was tied to a chair in an abandoned warehouse. "You finally awake beautiful" "Mcklousky" "I told you to tell your brother not to mess with me, now I have to kill you" "You wouldn't get away with this" "Oh I think I already have" "Think again Mcklousky, drop your weapons we have the place surrounded" Mcklousky went for his gun, and then the shots when off. It was gun shorts everywhere, everyone running. I closed my eyes and prayed. The last thing I remembered was Anthony picking me up in his arms and saying "Lexi you are ok, I'm here. She been shot, help she been shot"  When I woke up I was in hospital, with a massive head ach. "Lex, get the nurse she is awake" "Hi Ant" "Shhh easy" "What am I doing here? What time is it" I gestured my hand towards the hospital room. "It’s just after ten am you been out for a few hours and you got shot in the crossfire" "Mcklousky" "Don't worry we got him." "And James" "He is home everything is ok, don't worry just relax" "I want to go home" "We have to hear what the doctor say first" "John, what you doing here" "I'm here to see my girl" "I'll go see what's taking the doctor, don't upset her." "I wouldn't"  Jonathan clued me in on what happened after I passed out. I convinced the doctor that I'm good to go home. I used my, getting shot, to my advantage. "Ant I want ice-cream please" "I'll get you any ice-cream you want princess" I giggled. Everyone was supper nice to me, and so happy to see me alive. I was on sick leave for the next week doctors’ orders, and even thou I didn't have to do anything I still did. I decided to move into my apartment. Vince and James helped me, Jonathan and Anthony finished up their investigation.  Everything turned back to normal or as normal as it could. About a week later there was a knock at my door. "Hello you" "Hey how you feeling?" "I'm fine John, if one more person is going to ask me that I'm going to scream" He just laughed. "So what brings you here?" "I came to say goodbye" "You leaving?" "I can't stay" "Is it because of my father?" "What makes you say that?" "I overheard you and him in his study" "That explains it, that's why you went for a run" I just nodded. "I'm sorry Lex" "What does he have on you?" "What do you mean" "He is blackmailing you into leaving, with what?" "It’s not like that Lex, he just don't think I'm right for you. I think he might be right" "I don't, dam it John. I.... I don't want you to go"  He took my hand pull me close in his arms, "I love you Alexis I didn't know I do, but I do now." "John" "No wait let me finish. I really love you, but I can't stay I'm bad for you. I haven’t even been here a month and you been beat, kidnapped and shot." "That wasn't your fault" He tilled my head up, kiss me like he has never kissed me before. Then he let me go.  "I'm so sorry Lex, I didn't mean for this.." He didn't finish. He walked out and I was sure I saw tears in his eyes. I don't believe him and I'm going to find out what my father has against him. My father is blackmailing him that I am sure off.                             The End

 

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Tag der Veröffentlichung: 11.04.2018

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