Hopeless

 

Annalise get your ass in this house this instant or I’m going to make it worse than it already is, girl didn’t I tell you to do the fucking dishes before you left this fucking house?. Yes you did dad I’m sorry I forgot to do it Liz was throwing up all night so I forgot to do the dishes I’m sorry I forgot to do them "smack" I slowly lift my hand up to my face and pull it back there is a drop of blood on my finger tip my lip is stinging I slowly raise my eyes up to my father when he grabs the front of my shirt and pulls me about an inch away from his alcohol reeking breath and spits in my face and throws me to the side and says get those facing dishes done or you’re going to regret' he stomps out of the house'.

Sigh my name is analyses Marie parslow and I am the daughter of the pack's drunk. it was ten years ago when I came home to my house and found my mother bleeding to death from an attack from a rogue werewolf, my father blamed her death on me because I was unable to save her even though I was only 5 years old at the time before I even shifted for the first time I was defenseless I had no way to protect myself or her from the man that killed my mother I couldn’t save her and for that I put up with everything my father does to me the broken bones the concussions the bruises everything I deserve

So about me I am 15 years old and I am a werewolf I just shifted for my first time yesterday and no one noticed or cared that I am a grown woman because of my father they don’t like me I am the most hated person in my whole pack I get beaten talked down I am a slave in my own house I am the smallest person in my pack I am 4'5 the runt of the pack the weakest link.

I have never been trained on how to fight back or how to harness my new found power. I wish I could belong have friends a boyfriend anyone who would love me but I am unlovable according to everyone in my pack I am unable to be loved. I go into the house before he comes out to hit me again and find that the sink and cupboards are full of dishes I see the boys and the football team were over today looks like I have at least 30 minutes of dishes to do I wish we could just switch to paper plates so it would be so much easier for me but they love having glass plates I guess, as soon as I finished I ran up the stairs to my room which is the attic it is so cold up here in the winter and hot in the summer but since I am the least important person in the back I get the smallest room and since I’m the least important person I have all the pack chores which everyone else is supposed to share but no since they are the “popular” crowd they think they are the top of the food chain so that they do not have to do anything except party and play games and sit on their lazy asses.

ANALISE GET IN HERE NOW!! Hmmm I wonder who that is wait I know the pack slut I swear she has slept with every guy in the school I stop what I’m doing grabbing a dish towel to dry my hands off and walk over to see what she wants ANALISE I SAID GET IN HERE NOW!!!!!!!! DO I HAVE TO TELL RAYNE YOUR NOT LISTENING AGAIN YOU KNOW WHAT HAPPENED LAST TIME, oh shit the last time I didn’t rush to do her ladyships bidding I got beat so bad by her and her groupies that I ended up in the hospital while Rayne watched on not doing anything he is supposed to be the one that protects me but I guess I’m not worthy enough to receive support from him.

I go to see what she wants and guess what she is the laziest person alive she wants the remote that is literally a foot outside of her reach I bend down to reach when all of a sudden I feel pain in my head it takes me a minute to realize that she kicked me because I was not moving fast enough for her likening ugh I hand her the remote and just as I was about to turn and leave, bitch come her did I say you can leave? No I didn’t so go into the kitchen and make me a low fat salad and a strawberry banana smoothie do not add a single drop of sugar you hear? Yes. Yes what? Yes mam I’m sorry mam may I leave. “Yes get the fuck out of my sight. “She says.

I turn and run out to make her salad I’m rushing through making her salad and smoothie thinking about how much homework I have ‘I talk out loud to myself so I have my essay to finish in English my advanced trig homework hmmmmm what else ugh I can’t remember’, I hear an overly sweet voice coming from the biggest bitch from hell say’ oh look guys the freak talks to herself’. I finish up her food and dish it up and bring it to her and set it down while not making eye contact I turn to leave when something liquid hits my head I look at my hair and realize that she dumped it on my head I turn and look at her and she says” oops, it was nasty make me a new one now!’. I sigh and go back into the kitchen and make her smoothie. “I know I will probly get in trouble for what imp going to do but fuck it I want to get revenge for how she has been treating me like shit since we stopped being friends 2 years ago when I told her I am in love with Rayne which is her lover for the past 3 years. I don’t know why she would be jealous of me he has never looked at me twice unless he is telling me to go fetch things for him.

 I wish that I could just have someone that would like me as much as my best friend jade does but I just could never have those kind of feelings for him. I could not even try he has asked me out so many times that I think that if he keeps asking me out that it’s going to ruin my friendship with him I really need him to find him a woman imp getting tired of his constant puppy dog eyes he gives me when he thinks imp not looking. I head upstairs to get my things ready to take a shower I gather my stuff and walk in the shower and start the shower and get in I am just washing my hair out when all of a sudden the shower curtain slides open and I look over and my jaw drop's there stands the man of my dreams Rayne. "what are you doing in here, alpha?', he says " I need to take a shower and all the other ones are full so you are going to share yours with me ' ugh I can’t say no to him because I don’t know what the consequences might be so I might as well just deal with and hope that I can get out of the shower quick enough that I will not have to see anything you see even with all the abuse that I have been given I am still a virgin I want to stay that way until I have found my mate.

I look down as he enters the shower so that I don’t have to see his man parts, I blush red when I happen to glance up and see the one thing I did not want to see standing at full attention so I horridly glance up to him and he is standing there grinning like a fool I ask him why is he smiling and he said' do you like what you see' I blush and look down and he says'awnser me I want to know bambino please tell me' I look up at him and say' I am not allowed to look at you remember you told me to never look at unless I have been ordered to because you don’t want to see my horrible face" he blanches then says in Italian to me" Mi dispiace per come mi è stato curante non ho mai voluto farti del male ero appena abbiate timore dei miei sentimenti per voi prego mi perdoni io voglio che tu sia il mio compagno per favore?"(I am so sorry for how I have been treating you I never meant to hurt you I was just afraid of my feelings for you please forgive me I want you to be my mate please?)' I look up to him and say so you can only tell me about your feelings in Italian because me and you are the only ones that understand me? he blushes and nods and I say why do you want me now after all these years of either pretending I don’t exist or acting like imp the bane of your existence I don’t understand why you had to hurt me so much I did nothing to you. "imp sorry for all I have done please forgive me can we start over?' yes we can as long as you promise to never be a jackass to me again if you do I will leave you I have had enough hurt in my life already." okay I won’t do anything again I promise you." I smile up at him and lay my head on his chest and wrap my arms around his waist I can believe he is mine. I feel him move so I look up at him and he leans down and gently kisses me on the lips imp mentally freaking out I don’t know what to do I have never kissed a guy before so i try to copy his motions I can feel him smiling against my lips so I pull back with a question in my eyes and he says you’re so adorable when you do that I can feel a blush rising so I look down at my feet with embarrassment  I say sorry and then I feel his finger on my chin lifting my face up to his and he leans his forehead down on mine and says never apologize for nothing you did wrong, i am the person that has been doing wrong to you and for that i will always be enternally sorry for i wish i could tak every mean action and word back but i cant, do you think you can find it in you to forgive me? i love you.

 

new beginings

 i wake up the next morning refreshed and ready for the day, i hope out of bed and rush to get in the shower so i can be ready for school on time.

Impressum

Texte: Daryan holbert
Tag der Veröffentlichung: 25.09.2014

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