It seems like forever since I’ve seen Micah’s face, but I truth it’s only been ten years. A decade, 5,258,487 minutes, ten years since I’ve seen Micah. Some days I just want to bite his head off, he hasn’t came for me, and some days I still hold on to the hope that maybe he will. Maybe I just have to give him some more time, but then my wolf screeches at me most of the time she says things like, it’s been ten years how much longer does he need? Other times she’ll just curse at me, but she apologizes later. They’ve kept us here, a place called California, for these ten years. Every day I wish something would happen, they would find us but it never happens. Mom hasn’t been much help, since after the fifth year she just broke down. She doesn’t talk much now; she does her chores, and eats her food cries and sleeps. I don’t think she’s trying to believe daddy will come for her, I think she’s just given up on hope completely. I let out a sigh as I sew together grass clothes, it’s hard to do this because you can’t rush it through the loom because then you’ll rip it. But after 5 years of doing this I think I can go pretty fast. I start to hum, it’s an old song but I’ve heard Cora humming it sometimes. I think it was old back then, the thought of Cora makes my eyes sting with tears so I just hum louder. I hear a whimper and I turn to look at mom, her looks have drastically changed, her brown eyes have become sad instead of happy, her hair has dulled and the only brightness in it is the green stripes. Her face is a constant frown so she doesn’t have the laugh lines she had 10 years ago. She’s trying to make the grass go through the loom but her hands have become shaky so it’s difficult, I let out a frustrated sigh and lean over her,
“Relax, it’s going to be ok,” I tell her as I realign the grass so it’s not sideways, “Micah and daddy will come, and we’ll be out of here” I tell her. I plant a kiss on her cheek and sit back where my loom is,
“Soon,” I say with happiness, and because I don’t believe myself “hopefully” I add.

Hope is a funny thing isn’t it? When you need it, it’s there but it’s only a charade and when you don’t need it, there it is ready to fake you into believing that everything will be alright. Right now I have absolutely no hope, my life has been a living hell, and as soon as those five minutes started I knew that it would last forever. We have been trying to find them for ten years, and for ten years we haven’t succeeded. Her father seems to always be upset and the pack has gone unsettled. My mother died 2 years ago, but I haven’t had time to mourn, I’ve become alpha so as my first motion I moved the pack closer to the dens. Good thing Oregon is like wolf central because there are plenty other den’s nearby. We tried tracking her scent, going to where sprites normally are but so far we have nothing. I just want to hold her in my arms now, just rock her back and forth and never let her go, I think her father is the same way about her mother. He shut down after the eight year so he’s no help with the pack or helping finding them. His blond hair has become dirty his eyes dull and his face grim. Why can’t hope actually be on my side for once?


“Mom,” I shake her up, she’s fallen asleep again “zhafar wants us” her head pops up and she fixes her hair. It’s best if we not go to zhafar bad-looking. I learned that the hard way, he got to punish me and I don’t like being punished by him, no more than I like to be punished by mom’s dad. I am not to call him grandfather because a grandfather wouldn’t do what he does to me to his granddaughter. She stands up and together we walk up the stairs, out of the basement and into the darkened hallway. She stops me and fixes my hair, puffs up my cheeks and wipes off some of the dust off my clothes; I do the same for her. Together we walk into the living room and together us smiles. This is standard procedure when it comes to zhafar, he doesn’t like to see us sad, and at first I thought it was nice but later on I realize he’s a monster. And his face isn’t handsome at all; it’s ugly and disgusting, just like the soul beneath it.
“Hello ladies” he says smoothly, he’s sitting on one of the leather chairs that are in the living room. I never liked this room; it has that whole grunge thing that I don’t like.
“Hello” we both say, this is the only time I hear my mother’s voice, and even then it sounds broken, he has to have noticed and just doesn’t care.
“Well I’m sure you’re wondering why I called you?” when we both nod he points to the main door,
“Open it” he says lightly. I’m afraid to, grand mom says we are never to open the door, and we’re never to leave, this could be a trick. To get s to be punished again, I look to him and he raises an eyebrow. I know what this is, a silent question, asking if I dare to defy him. Instead I smile and walk to the door with slow careful steps. I look up the stairs to grand mom and mom’s dad rooms, there’s no sound. They must be sleeping, it is pretty late, and I wonder why zhafar is up. I close my hand around the knob and turn it, nothing’s happening, no alarms are going, nothing is attacking me. I open it and breathe in the night air, oh how much I’ve missed the night air!
“What do you think you’re doing?” I hear grand mom’s voice hiss at me and I slam the door closed. Her eyes are red, and her hands are on her hips,
“I thought I told you no opening the door and no leaving” she yells at me, I put my head down and sneak a peek at zhafar. He’s fighting off a smile and tries to look furious,
“Sorry grand mom” I say low with my head down,
“You don’t know the meaning of sorry” she sneers, then from the corner of my eye I can see her look to zhafar. Oh no,
“Take her to her room, and punish her” her voice is cold and unloving, I put my eyes back down and I hear her walk up the stairs. He walks to me and grabs my arm roughly, he drags me all the way down the hallway to where I and mom’s room are and he pushes me onto the mattress on the floor that belongs to me. I get up and kneel on the bed,
“Please you don’t have to do this, just please let us go” I beg, he has to see this is wrong. He has to see he can’t do this.
“Your mother should have been with me” he says angrily “you should have been my child, and because of her whorish ways you belong to another”. I’m hurt by his words; my mother is not a whore!
“If you cannot belong to me by blood you will be mine another way” he pushes me on the bed and climbs on top of me, I kick and squirm trying to get away from him trying to grab anything, anything that will help me escape. That earns me a slap in the face, it stings like a million spears of ice shooting at my face, and that was the last straw. I howl, but this isn’t a normal howl, this howl moves heaven and earth, it shakes the ground, it explodes ears. While he covers his ears I push him off of me and snap his neck, the punisher is no more, I run into the living room and hold my mom’s hand. Her face is confused she doesn’t know what’s going on, I don’t have time to explain so I settle for,
“We’re leaving” I say fast and short me run and open the door. I don’t have time to bask in the air that hits me or the smells that waft into my nose instead I run onto the lawn. I take a breath and howl, a searching howl, I don’t think we’re that far from Oregon and maybe they can hear me. I listen hard; I hear grand mom and mom’s dad getting ready to come down. I can’t hear anything else, I howl again longer and louder this time, I think I hear the faintest sound of a howl, not well enough. I howl again an angry searching howl and this time I hear a reply. It’s to the north of me and there is nothing but land there. I look to mom again,
“Can you fly” she nods her head and I spread my wings,
“Then get ready” we fly away just as grand mom and mom’s dad comes out. I happily think hahahahahahaa we’re leaving.


“Their coming” is all her father says after he shifts back, his face is clearer now and I can see his smile,
“She called me and their coming”
“Whoa whoa whoa” I hold my hands up “you mean to tell me that a wolf can howl and you think that it’s Elizabeth?”
“One, I know my daughters howl, two have you heard any other howling in the past ten years?” his face is understanding bordering on anger.
“I guess your right” I’m giddy with hope now, but the question is when will they get here, will they fly, will they walk, and do they have money? So many questions so little answers.


This air feels amazing, especially when we’re so high up,
“Can we fly any faster?” mom asks being a little annoyed; this is the 8th time she’s asked this
“You know for a person who’s been catatonic for almost 5 years your very chatty” I spit back at her, I want this moment to last forever but she’s right we should fly faster. I howl again and this time I hear him, that low throaty growl I’m too excited to hold in my happiness,
“Daddy?!” I yell and I listen
“Elizabeth!”
“Michael” mommy yells and she jets off toward the direction of his yells
“Alexis!”
“Micah!?” I yell
“Alexis!” and soon I’m flying fast with her too. We’re giggling and holding hands all the way to the clearing, where we see Micah and daddy. We land and we start running, we haven’t run in a while so we’re kind of slow but they run to us too. Micah has gotten older and more handsome but I don’t really care about how he looks, as long as he’s there. I wrap my arms around his shoulders and wrap my legs around his waist. He holds me close to him, nearly squishing me to death, but I don’t care. He’s here, with me!
“Don’t ever let me go” I whisper through tears into his ears
“I never plan to again” if I listen closely I can hear his tears fall out of his eyes.


She’s here, oh god she’s finally here. It doesn’t matter that she’s kind of dirty, or that she has grime covering her body. She’s here! And she’s grown, a lot. Her body has changed, so has mine, she’s taller her hair is longer. I try not to focus on her body but its hard not to when she’s pushed up against me. Her breasts aren’t huge but there big, her legs have gotten more shapely and they cling tight to me as if they lighten up she’ll go away forever. Something stirs inside of me and I bite her,
“Ouch!” she takes her legs from around me and steps back,
“What’d you do that for?” she asks tersely, then she widens her eyes and she looks down “sorry” she mutters. She stands awkwardly in front of me and I’m confused, why’d she put her head down and why is it still down.
“Elizabeth, its ok” her mother says, one hand is tightly holding Michaels hand the other is patting Elizabeth on the shoulder,
“He’s not going to hurt you” she says softly. And slowly anger rises up in me,
“Who hurt her?” I ask between clenched teeth,
“No one” Elizabeth mutters and she raises her head slowly, there crystal blue and I watch slowly as they turn green and she smiles sadly.
“Let’s just forget about it” she says softly
“No, who hurt you?” I ask again I can’t help the growl that come out and I watch as her eyes swirl to a light blue
“Can we please just forget about it?” she asks softly,
“No, tell me, now” I step closer and growl, her eyes swirl to pale blue and she opens her mouth. But then she freezes she looks at me and her eyes swirl to red,
“No,” for a minute she sounds back to her old self,
“I have missed out on 10 years of my life, being a slave. Waiting, hoping praying that you would find me!” she clenches her fists,
“For 10 years I was in that hell whole, and was pushed, and bossed around. And after countless times of saying no, and no one listening to me I will be DAMMED if my own mate forces me!” she yells. She steps closer to me and points in my face
“So, I’m not going to tell you what happened but I will tell you this, for ten years I was raped and abused and was put to slavery. For ten years I would howl and hope that I could hear one of you calling me. For ten freaking years I’ve missed you! So do me this one favor” she puts her finger down and her face softens,
“Please don’t make me have to kill you after we finally see each other” she pats my cheek and her eyes swirl to a brighter green,
“Ok?”
“Ok” I smile then I kiss her cheek, she leans her head back and grabs my face. She kisses me on my lips, she licks my upper lip then my bottom lip, I open my mouth and she plunges her tongue in my mouth. She rubs her tongue over mine softly and slowly and just when I’m about to kiss her back she separates.
“Wow,” she said breathlessly “that’s what a real kiss feels like” she smile brilliantly. She lets go of my face and twirls to her father,
“What took you so long to answer me?” she says softly,
“My wolf has been out of sorts” he says apologetically, “I would have howled sooner if he wouldn’t have shut down” he hugs her and she hugs him back and tears start to come out.
“Oh god, I’m so sorry baby girl,” he rubs her hair “I’m so sorry” she starts to sob uncontrollably. She continues to cry until she’s all dried out and she passes out from exhaustion. Her father puts her in my arms,
“If she leaves me again while under your care,” he says as he backs up “I will not hesitate to kill you and your pack”. I take this seriously.


When I wake up I’m in clothes, actual clean clothes. I smell like soap and my hair smells like roses. But there’s something wrong with my chest, I sit up and take off my shirt, I have on a black hold thingy, and it’s pushing my breasts up on my chest. I don’t like it, it makes me feel contained. I try to take it off like I took off my shirt but it only hurts my back. What is this? I pull of one of the straps off and then the other. It folds a little bit at the top so I must have to pull it off like I would pants. I stand up off the mattress on the bed, how did that get there? I manage to put it down to my belly button when I hear a grunt from the opening, I turn around and see Micah standing there, in his eyes a lust and hunger is there that I’ve only seen on zhafar and mom’s dad. I blush and stand to my full height,
“Yes?” he puts his eyes down; I shouldn’t have to hide anything from him,
“I head a struggle and I wanted to see what was wrong”, he scratches his forehead,
“You think you could uh, cover that up?” I’m confused what he means and then looks down, oh my breasts. I put the sheet over me,
“It’s safe now,” I tell him and when he looks up I smile awkwardly at him
“You think you could help me get this thing off me, it won’t come off and I’m starting to get really upset” I tell him.
“You mean, your bra?” at my confused face he laughs
“It has straps?”
“Yeah”
“Then it’s a bra, and sure I can help” he walks closer to me and I turn and move my hair out the way. Giving me a waft of roses, it’s grown and it reaches my hips. He whistles
“Wow it’s all the way down there” he grumbles and then he unbuckles it. I try not to focus on the feel of his hands on my bare back but its hard not to. I groan and his hands freeze, and so do I. he moves his hands further apart until there on my hips and he turns me around I look into his eyes and watch as he leans down and kisses me. I don’t hide anything from him I open my mouth and let him take what is his. Not thinking I wrap my arms around his shoulders and reach up on my toes. I cling my legs around his waist still not breaking the kiss and he lowers us down to the bed. He braces either hand on the side of me and I raise his shirt slowly. He breaks the kiss for a second and rips his shirt off he kisses me again, this time more urgently, I unbuckle my pants and kick them off. I unbuckle his and pull them off of him, still holding onto our kiss he moans and pulls back.
“Are you sure?” he says panting, and I nod
“I want to be yours in every way imaginable” I whisper and then I wrap my arms around his shoulders and we made love until the sun went down.


I stretch at the mouth of the den, I have never felt better. All my limbs pop and crack and I sigh Micah’s still sleeping and I woke just in time to see the moon rise from the horizon. I haven’t seen mom or dad since I woke up, and I’d wager their sleeping too. I don’t hear him sneak up behind me so I’m startled when his arms go around my waist, I’m wearing one of his shirts and it’s loose around me but it feels right.
“You left” his voice is husky,
“I woke up, I believe there’s difference” I say as I rub his arm and continue to look at the moon. He kisses my ear,
“You scared me,” he says in a serious voice that I giggle at,
“You sound like you did when you were 12” I tell him and he squeezes me which makes me giggle louder.
“If you don’t stop your gonna wake up your parents”
“I’m not afraid of them anymore; last I checked I’m 18”
“But your still in my den!” we hear daddies voice say and I chuckle.
“Sorry” I yell at him and then look at Micah “troublemaker” I mumble at him.
“Hey you were the one throwing liberty rights this way and that if anything you’re the trouble maker, no scratch that, you’re the rebel”
“Hmm, I think I like my nick name” I purr at him then laugh when I hear his low growl.
“Shouldn’t you guys be going to bed” I hear mom yell,
“we should, but there is no guarantee we will” I yell back, I hear daddy sputter and Micah purr and I think I could get used to this life.


She is amazing; I never thought I would ever be able to love a person like this. We made love until the moon rose and then we made love until the moon was high h in the sky. When I wake up again she’s still in my arms. Soft snoring comes from her and her hair is a mess, to me she has never been more beautiful. She stirs in my arms and turns around, she doesn’t wake p she just latches her arms around me and presses her naked body against me. She lets out a sigh of contentment and continues to sleep; softly I move strands of hair from her face and tickle her arms softly with my fingers.
"you know” her voice startles me “I won’t be able to get sleep if you do that to me?”
“That’s what you said last night but you seemed to be happy not to sleep” I tell her and she hugs tighter to me
“Last night wasn’t a bad thing, but we both need some rest”
“Well,” we jump at her father’s voice and wraps the sheet over her body and sits up “you both need to get up, it’s about 12” he leaves the compartment in the den. She lets out a breath and shoots me a scathing glare,
“Hey,” I raise my hand in surrender “I didn’t know he was there” she lets out a little sigh and sticks her tongue out. Before she gets up she puts on my shirt and stretches. When I look at her she giggles,
“I learned I can’t stretch naked in front of you” she says
“Well you know sometimes people have to do things three times in order to really learn it?”
“Some other time baby but,” she rubs her stomach as she walks away “I’m starved and you’re not dressed. So get your little fanny up so I can eat”


I don’t know where I found this confidence from but he seems to like it, so I have to put on a face and be brave.
“My fanny is little?” he says as he gets up and looks at it “I think it’s a bit wide”
“Whatever you say boss, can we get something to eat before I disappear?” I say a little bit whiney.
“You could never disappear” he says and I send him a look that makes him hold up his hands and send me a crooked grin. I turn and walk to the main compartment of the den mom is peeling nuts and daddy is rinsing off the berries in some of the lake water gathered in a bowl.
“Good morning” I say and daddy turns, he smiles at me and I walk to him and hug him. I feel my eyes sting, but I push them back, it’s over now my wolf tells me Micah will protect us. He pats my back and I let go, I look to mom and I see her face is lightened. The sad woman that was there in the basement is gone and has been replaced with a shining star. Her hair isn’t dull anymore her eyes are light and happy.
“Need help with those?” I say nodding toward the nuts and she nods. I grab a handful and start to deshell them, she clears her throat
“Back there, I’m sorry I wasn’t there with you-“
“Don’t, ok” I smile “it’s over, where safe”
“Danm right your safe” Micah says as he wraps his arms around my waist and leans his head on my shoulder,
“Language” I warn and he smiles sheepishly
“I’m not 12 anymore and you’re not my mom, so I don’t have to listen to you” he says like a child
“Oh yeah? Ok” I say and nod my head “so I don’t have to listen to you?”
“Precisely” I peck his cheek then shimmy my hips and he growls
“Stop that” he scolds half heartedly
“Nope I don’t have to listen to you” I say and wiggle
“But you have to listen to me, so knock it off” mom says not taking her eyes off the nuts and I stop with a blush on my face. I start peeling again but then Micah’s head pops from my shoulder, I’m about to ask what’s wrong when I smell it too. Daddy must smell it to because he stops washing the berries; I break from Micah’s grasp and start sprinting toward it, Micah behind me and daddy behind him. The smell gets stronger when we head east toward it. My vision gets clear and I see further down and about 3 miles from here a grey wolf stands,
“Change!” I yell at them and I morph into my wolf.
Who the hell is that? My wolf growls at me, I don’t know I respond. Micah runs up on my left and daddy on my right. Why aren’t they running ahead of me, your alpha its taboo to run ahead of the alpha, my wolf tells me? Huh, the rogue is still there standing in a defensive stance and I slow to a trot. I sit down in front of him and his stance calms down until he sits too. I smell the rest of the pack gather around us but I keep my eye on the rogue’s eyes, their green is never ending. Micah growls at me and I give him a low warning growl. The rogues eyes snap between me and the cougar, I’m sure he’s asking who the cougar is. I stand up slowly and circle him, I sniff his neck, and he doesn’t seem dangerous. I wish I could hear what he’s thinking, but he’s not in my pack and I can only hear them.
“Daughter?”
“Yes?” I ask cautiously
“What do you wish to do?”
“Tell everyone to change” I tell him then I slowly allow myself to change.


I see her about to change so I allow myself to change too, by the time she’s finished I’m finished too. She stands there naked with hands on her hips showing no fear in front of the rogue and I feel my heart swell with pride, I’m just a short amount of time I’ve improved her courage. Her pack stands defensive even her mother stands defensive,
“Mate, mother and beta step forward” her voice is hoarse and scratchy and I realize it’s not her it’s her wolf. I step forward along with her father and her mother,
“Shift” that one simple word rolls against the rogue and he drops to the ground and doesn’t come back up until he’s human and naked. He’s Elizabeth’s age and her height, she gasps and her eyes widen along with his,
“You” she growls out
“Fancy seeing you here” the rogue says and I fell like ripping his throat out.
“Why are you in my territory?” she growls
“How did you escape?” he asks back simply
“That is none of your concern, leave” she says and he whines. He doesn’t want to go,
“I don’t have anywhere else to go” he says
“Is that my problem?” she asks incredulously
“actually yes it is, if you hadn’t been there that day and my pack hadn’t told me to try to save you I would still be there” he growls, she steps closer
“It’s your fault that you didn’t save me jack ass!” she hisses at him “one of your own kind” she yells. I try to grab her arm to tell her to calm down but her father growls at me in warning, it’s clear he wants her to deal with this herself.
“Nobody told you to get caught” he yells
“is that what your really telling me, it was my fault I got caught and was held captive, so I guess it’s my fault too that they raped me oh and just to add on to the list I guess it’s my fault they constantly hit me too” she ended with a punch in his gut and when he went down she kneed him in the face. He landed on the floor with a thud and she grabbed him by the throat.
“You sicken me, do you understand?” she hisses at him, and he nods unable to do much
“Get the hell off my territory and never come back, if you do trust me I will not hesitate to kick your ass” she lets him go and stands
“Leave” she barks at him and he does changing and running east of us. She takes a breath and wipes her face, she changes and so does the rest of the pack including me. She turns to us and with her face full of sorrow she howls, a low mournful one. They howl and I roar, then she runs toward the dens.


I tried not to cry, I really did, but the memory just rushed back to me. He was there in the market standing across from me and I was so excited that he was a wolf! He could actually help me! I waited for 3 days after that, I told him my location and everything he just never came. After that I swore if I ever saw him I would kick his lying betraying ass! My two hits wasn’t a proper ass kicking but it felt good, I run into the den and straight into my compartment. I change trying to make it fast it worked but hurt like hell. I look around for clothes and see that mom has a white dress, it’s a halter top that has threading of silver and green in it and I instantly put it on. I make it out just in time to see the pack mom and Micah come back. Micah locks eyes with me and I turn away from them and run south. As the wind blows my hair I allow my mind to roam, but keep it far away from what happened to me. Micah and I had consummated our relationship and as excited I was about that a pang of fear ran through me. What if he got tired me later on; what if he just wanted me because I had grew up? No he loves me; he’s nothing like zhafar, nothing at all like zhafar. Mom is back and daddy loves her, I love them both so much. Strong arms wrap around my waist and hoist me up and I scream. As loud as I can I scream and he silences it with his hand.
“Shh” he whispers in my ear “it’s ok, it’s me your safe” I calm down as his voice surges through my mind and he lets me down. I whirl to him,
“Do you love me?” I ask him my voice low and cracked,
“Of course I do you’re my mate-“
“no, not because you’re my mate and fate has chosen us and blah, blah, blah, but do you love me?” my voice is gaining confidence
“Yes” he hesitates
“Why did you hesitate?” I ask fear making its way into my stomach
“Because-“
“Why did you hesitate?” I say slower and he just stars at me, tears swell up in my eyes and I smile. A sad deadly smile that scares even me. I walk past him and he grabs my arm
“Where are you going?” I rip my arm out of his grasp and continue to walk, when I hear his feet follow me I run. I can outrun him, maybe by a little but that’s all I need. I turn a corner unexpectedly and he drifts still trying to catch me. I see the tree limbs and decide to use them to use the m to my advantage. I leap up to one and bounce to the next one and the next one until I’m high. I jump to the next tree and spot the dens and I just hop the tree’s until I reach the tree nearest the den and I hop off into a crouch. I hear Micah’s roar and I smirk, that’s what you get!
“What happened sweetie?” mom rushes over and grabs my shoulders
“Nothing mom, I just found something out” I say cheerily
“Elizabeth come back in these woods right now!” we hear Micah roar and I turn on my heel
“You shouldn’t have lied you piece of crap!” I yell at him then I walk past my mother.
“I’m not leaving these woods until you talk to me!” he yells
“Then you might as well find another den to live in because I’m never ever talking to you again!” I yell back and stomp to the den.
“What happened?” daddy asks
“You should go get him” I say to him and just keep walking to my compartment. I lie on the bed and close my eyes, they’ll be a fight later on but I’ll win, I always do.


It’s not my fault she didn’t give me a chance to answer! I do love her, regardless of the imprinting or the mating or the sex! I love her, more than I thought possible. Her father saunters in and stares at me
“What?” I growl
“What did you do to her?” he asks simply
“Nothing, she asked me if I loved her and I tried to explain-“
“Whoa you tried to explain?” he shakes his head
“If I ever tried to explain to lexy she would chop my head off, you’re lucky she just ran from you” he walks to me and puts his hand on my shoulder
“If you ever want to talk to her again or even sleep in the same beds again you better go back there and just take it” he says then walks away.
“Wait, take what?” I yell after him but all that receives is a chuckle
“You’ll see”.


I smell him before he actually says something,
“I’m sorry” I don’t open my eyes I keep them closed and shrug one shoulder
“’s not your fault you don’t love me”
“I never said I don’t-“he takes a breath “I love you full and whole heartedly”
“Hmm” is all I say
“What that’s it?” he snaps at me
“Yes, that’s it”
“You don’t believe me do you” he asks in defeat
“Nope” I say and give him my back
“Figures”
he mutters and something inside me snaps. Suddenly I’m pissed at him; I stand up and glare at him
“Figures, what?” I growl
“Figures you wouldn’t believe me. All wolves are stubborn and bossy; I just thought you would be different”
“Ok, so I won’t be stubborn anymore, I’ll just tell you what I think about you” I step off the bed and stand directly in front of him
“You are a liar, you aren’t my mate and your hair is too damn spiky” I yell at him
“One I never lied two my hair is perfectly spiky and three we are mates” he lists on his fingers
“No we aren’t, real mates don’t lie to each other and real mates love each other regardless of fate” I yell
“I do love you regardless of fate, I don’t know you though, we haven’t spent any time together, so how the hell would you know if I’m lying?!” he ye;;s at me
“And who the hells fault was that? If you would have came earlier we would have been closer”
“Are you really going to keep blaming me for that?”
“Yes, because it’s your fault” I yell as I push by him
“How is it my fault you were taken?” he shows no sign of me pushing him
“Because you just stood there while they flew off with us!” he looks hurt but now I can’t stop the door has been opened and can’t be closed
“You stood there while they flew away with me and my mother, while they flew off and took us to that horrible place. Do you know what happened there? Of course not, how could you, you were here, for the first three years they did nothing but beat us and make us do things for them. Clean and cook, sew and wash and I thought ‘Micah will come, Micah will save us’ but you never did. For the rest of the seven years they raped me and mom, they hurt your ‘mate’ all because you weren’t there. I got pregnant, at 13; they cut me open and made me watch as they cut the baby over and over. Do you know what that did to me! Do you know what that did to mom!? She lost it; I lost hope and just stopped talking. I was never allowed outside except for that one time when the rogue found me. That was my one slither of hope, the one slither that lasted for 3 years. Your ‘mate’ suffered all because of you. And your ‘mate’ is suffering now because you lied to her. When all she needed was an honest answer” tears fall freely down my cheek and Micah stands as still as a statue “so that’s why I blame you, I blame you for my lost child. It doesn’t matter if the child was a creation of pain and anger it was mine. I blame you for the loss of my virginity and I blame you for the pain you’ve caused me for 10 years”. I wipe my face and push past him in the main compartment I see mom crying and daddy holding her.
“Don’t touch her” I growl at him and he lets go
“It’s your fault too, she waited on you, she shut down and no one could bring her back” I shake my head at him. I let it out, my story my pain and my losses. Maybe if I wasn’t so damn angry I would be happy that I could sleep without nightmares. I storm out of the den and I just breathe in the air,
“Are you ok, alpha?” I hear a tiny voice ask, I look down and see a little red head child and tears blur my vision I nod and she nods back then runs to her twin. I walk to the center of the den village and kneel in the dirt. I look at it, it’s very fertile and with a little bit of help it could nurture trees and vegetables. This soil represents me, with a little bit of help and love I could grow and live.


I hadn’t known she was so sad, so angry. I hadn’t known what happened to her and after hearing that I didn’t want to know. She was pregnant! Is my entire mind keeps returning to and I want to kick my ass, she was raped and it is because of me. My heart takes time to slow down so I can actually hear her father calling my name and feel her mother shaking my shoulders.
“She’s not responding to either of us and the pack is worried about her” her mother says frantically and I instantly stalk to the front of the den. Sure enough there she is kneeling in the dirt rubbing it with tears softly quietly running down her cheeks. I approach smoothly and quietly and the packs eyes follow me. I kneel next to her but she continues to rub the dirt her hands becoming black but she just stares at the dirt.
“I’m sorry” I say softly and I see her smile and shake her head,
“And I do love you unconditionally and uncontrollably, not because fate decided it or because I have to but because of who you are. And I wish I was there I do. But we tried to find you, we did constantly your father never slept and I always cried” she still rubs the dirt but the crying has stopped which is an improvement I guess.
“I wish you would have told me what happened earlier, I wish I could help you get over your hate” this time she does look at me and her eyes are a very dull pink.
“You already have”.


I’d recognize the twirl anywhere, this is the twirl I’ve longed for and have always wanted. Ever since the first twirl! Micah looks very confused but I smile and hug him, I hug him so close it hurts me as well as him. I cry happy tears,
“I love you so much Micah, so, so much thank you” I kiss all over his face then I claim his lips. I don’t wait for him to open his mouth I just pierce my tongue through and massage mine with his until he moans. I shoot up and squeal and rub my belly victoriously,
“Yes, yes, yes!!” I jump up and down
“What is it?” Micah asks standing up looking on the defense; I gasp and grab his hand. He can feel it now! Only shifters can feel the zap of it, I put it on my stomach and we look at each other, it takes a while but he smiles and laughs. He picks me up and I wrap my legs around his waist I kiss him all over his face and we stop. The pack looks so confused, so I get down and address them
“I’m pregnant” I say with as much alpha-iness I can but it comes out squeally and girlish. All the girls run to me including the two red- head twins and the entire boys pat Micah on the back. They all ransack me just to touch my stomach and they all leave excited and happy. My pain and grief is over and I have to start a new life for the baby’s sake and for Micah’s sake. I think my soul has finally, fully returned.

Impressum

Tag der Veröffentlichung: 29.12.2011

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