It usually takes something big to get my attention. Think planets colliding, stars exploding, or solar systems spinning into black holes. Every particle of matter in existence registers in my subconscious, but events that require actual thought generally affect galaxies. So it’s surprising that the actions of a single, relatively insignificant life form should captivate my interest for so long. Admittedly, I came rather late into these events. In order for you to understand what happened, the curtains of time must be pulled back and you must see the story unfold from the beginning, through the eyes of those who lived it. I will do what I can to put my thoughts forward in a manner you comprehend. Pay attention, for even minds such as mine do well to remember this truth; the tiniest individual can have worth greater than the stars.
Like every member of his race, Riznah was born of the Hive. Of course, at the time of his hatching he had no way of knowing his name, but Riznah it was. For over eight weeks he fed on nectar that filled his chamber. When the nectar was gone he raised his head to the ceiling and nibbled through the delicate membrane that had prevented his food supply from evaporating. The fresh sensation of air moving over the rotund cylinder of his body was lost to him as he opened his mouth in a silent scream of hunger. He sensed something large approaching, and a drop of liquid fell into his mouth. It was thicker than the nectar he was accustomed to, but it was sweet and satisfied his appetite. As his hunger pains subsided he became aware of other large figures passing back and forth. His mind was almost overpowered by a sense of hunger that projected from separate sources all around him. A single, more ordered feeling of purpose emanated from the shadowy forms moving about.
After two weeks of resting in the chamber and raising his head regularly to receive nourishment, Riznah possessed a set of legs strong enough to drag his weight. Using forelegs to grab the rim of the chamber and pushing with stronger rear legs he was able to heave himself to the top of the only place he knew. Eyesight was a luxury he did not yet possess, but Riznah could sense his surroundings well enough to conquer the maze he had just ascended. He felt a great urge to be moving toward something, but didn’t know where to go until one of the large Foodbringers came and began nudging him with its forelegs. From the Foodbringer came an impression to move in the direction he was being pushed. His new limbs were awkward, and he stumbled frequently as he navigated the sea of birthing chambers that separated Riznah from his destination, whatever it was.
About the time his appendages finally coordinated their efforts he came to a vast nothingness. He was used to the feeling of space around him, for birthing chambers opened on every side as he traveled, but this was different. Always before he had been able to feel solid ground in front of him. Now there was nothing and he waved his forelegs in emptiness. The Foodbringer did not pause behind him for long. Pushing its bulk against him, it forced him over the edge and turned back to its work.
With a squeak of dismay Riznah went sliding down, tumbling end over end several times before coming to a stop. Gathering his scattered senses and getting his legs beneath him once more, he cautiously dragged himself toward a scent he could not identify. It was powerful ang intriguing. He had to know what it was. The surface he crawled over was different than anything he had ever felt. It was hard. The birthing chambers were firm, but they weren’t exactly hard. Not like this at least.
The scent grew stronger and he sensed a great mound in front of him. Coming closer, he could feel other larvae moving with him to the mound. Upon reaching the base, he investigated its substance. The mound was made of countless tiny balls he identified as the source of the scent that had attracted him. He took an exploratory nibble out of a ball. This was the best food he'd had yet! Greedily he filled his belly with the delicacy. He continued to gorge himself long after he was full, completely ignoring the other larvae that crawled over and around him as they, too, obeyed the internal command to feast. Unable to cram another bite into his massively expanded stomach, he dragged and rolled himself wearily away from the banquet. When he seemed to be alone he lay still and was asleep long before something similar to a Foodbringer came and wrapped silken threads around his body, rolling him over and over until he was completely encased in them.
Movement greeted him as he woke nearly six weeks later. He was being moved by something outside of his cocoon. Although curious he was unalarmed, for a great sense of welcome and excitement filtered through the fabric of his cocoon. He could feel whatever was carrying him press against him, and Riznah noticed his body was drastically different than the one he remembered. It was hard, much like the floor of the banquet cavern he remembered falling asleep on. There seemed to be different sections to him where before, his body was one continuous mass. His hearing and sense of smell were greatly improved as well; he could hear clicking and rustling all around him.
Suddenly his momentum stopped. Whatever was carrying him (Riznah began to suspect there was more than one something supporting him) waited a moment then moved forward a little and stopped again. This process repeated itself over and over again. The sense of welcome and excitement he felt from outside mounted steadily until he was sure he would burst with excitement himself. Something incredible was about to happen! Those carrying him stopped once more and lowered him slowly to the ground.
Something was tearing at his cocoon now. He could feel the fabric around his head pull away and realized there were two somethings attached to the top of his head giving him all sorts of sensory information he’d never experienced before. He was finally getting impatient to be out of his container, when the part of cocoon covering his head was lifted away with an loud ripping sound. He found himself staring into a huge pair of round, intelligent eyes on top of an ageless, shiny black face. The jaws at the bottom of the face opened sideways and closed again as two long antennae bent toward Riznah. Instinctively he felt his antennae rise to meet them. One of his own reached one of the others and he felt a tingle that sent shivers to the tip of his abdomen. The other antennae found each other and the moment they made contact his entire being was charged with electricity. It coursed through every fiber of his body and made him aware of every part of himself. Their antennae disengaged and as the jolting current withdrew, his mind was filled with music. It was deep and powerful as the earth. It sang of unity and sharing, industry and sacrifice. It was simple in harmony, but all the more beautiful because of it. Riznah loved it and knew the melody was a part of him older than himself.
Into the music came a voice ancient and wise. “Welcome, Youngling. We are honored to have you among us. I am your Queen. I direct the mind and voice of the Hive that you are now a part of. Your brothers and sisters will help you out of your cocoon and introduce you to your duties as a member of the Hive. We will call you Riznah. Welcome.”
The voice withdrew from his mind but the music remained, though it faded into the background of his thoughts. Looking around, Riznah decided being able to see was almost as nice as hearing the music of the Hive. He was in a tunnel that stretched down and away from him, growing narrower the farther it went. No more than two of the column of Hive members holding cocoons could fit side by side at the far end, but where he stood it was wide enough to hold at least twenty. The Queen occupied the widest point of the tunnel. She was half again as tall as any in the room and at least twice as long. Her forelegs bent gracefully at the elbow and held her dainty pinchers just below her mandible. Her thorax gleamed like living coal, and her abdomen stretched for at least twelve feet behind her rear pair of legs. She was magnificent, and Riznah was inordinately pleased with himself for being a member of her Hive.
The two nearest Hive members stepped forward, dipped their antennae politely, and raised him off the ground. Riznah knew by their scent they were the same who had brought him to the Queen. As they lifted and carried him around the Queen he felt two separate voices speak into his mind.
“My name is Jeerd,” said the first.
“And I am called Ketzle,” came the second.
Riznah struggled at first to form words with his thoughts, “I Riznah. I very happy for you help me.”
Jeerd and Ketzle laughed.
“This one learns fast,” Jeerd said jokingly. “Ketzle here was a full week into training before he thought a word any of us could understand.”
“That’s only because it took that long for Jeerd to be silent long enough for me to speak.”
Riznah joined in their laughter this time as they carried him through a tunnel that opened before them. Laughing felt nice. They were only in this tunnel for a few minutes before it spilled into a huge cavern. The floor was littered with pieces of cocoon and all around him brothers and sisters were being freed from their soft prisons. Moving away from the entrance a few yards they set him down and went to work getting him out of the cocoon. He helped where he could, enjoying the feel of the silken threads as his jaws sliced them to pieces. It was hardly a moment before he was on his feet and the remains of his cocoon joined the others on the ground.
“It feels strange to be so high,” Riznah said as he looked at the floor nearly five feet below. Words were already much easier to form.
“It certainly takes some getting used to,” said Ketzle.
Jeerd nodded in agreement and said, “Follow me and I’ll take you to receive your Assignment. Ketzle has to help another Youngling now.” Ketzle dipped his antennae and left.
“What’s an Assignment?”
“Oh there’s lots of them! You could be a Tender,” Jeerd stopped using words and pushed a series of images into Riznah’s mind depicting a sister moving among birth chambers dropping liquid nourishment into upturned mouths. “Or you could be a gatherer,” this time Riznah didn’t understand the images, but the feeling that accompanied them was of great danger while finding food to share with the Hive.
“What’s your assignment, Jeerd?”
“Me? Oh, I’m a laborer. We do just about anything that needs done,” he said proudly. “Not many Assignments teach multiple skills. You gotta have brains to be a laborer.”
As they spoke Jeerd led off across the cavern. They were now approaching the far side, where a long line of Younglings led to a pair of Hive members inspecting each in turn. Jeerd stopped.
“I’d love to find out what your Assignment is, but I’m needed in the Great Hall. Step into line and keep your chin up, big feller.” With that he turned and walked away.
Riznah watched him go for a moment before continuing to the back of the line. It took several hours, but eventually the hundreds of Younglings in front of him received their Assignments, dissipating into the tunnels that led out from the massive chamber. Finally it was his turn. He stood stiff with excitement as the pair of Hive sisters descended upon him with motherly attention.
“He’s got a glint in his eye, this one does. He’ll go far as a laborer Nashta,” said one as she held his face between her pincers.
“You say that every time Meira,” replied the other as she inspected one of his support legs.
“Well in his case it’s true. Look at the strength in his jaw!”
“Then he shouldn’t be a laborer. Maybe a gatherer would be better.” Nashta was now prodding different parts of his thorax. “Besides, he’s too big. This one was built to do more than coddle Younglings.”
“I think you’re right, for once.” Meira was behind Riznah, stroking his wings admiringly.
“What do you mean, for once? I’m always right. You’re the one that gets things confused.” Nashta took a long step back and ran an appraising eye over his whole form. “Yes indeed, there’s only one thing for it.”
The two voices sounded together in his mind, “Riznah, we Assign you to be a warrior!” Images of battle erupted in his mind. He saw Hive warriors defending tunnels against invaders and felt their wild lust for combat as they soared at enemy Hives. He didn’t understand most of the images, but he gathered enough from their emotions to know warriors were extremely important for the survival of the Hive. Riznah felt he should thank the sisters for selecting him for so great an Assignment. But a question burned in his mind.
“I am deeply honored. Thank you.” The sisters were beaming. “But there is a question I would ask: why do we send warriors to attack other Hives? Are they not also our brothers and sisters?”
The sisters weren’t beaming anymore. In fact, they looked horrified. What had he said? Should he apologize?
Before he could manage so much as “I’m sorry”, Nashta broke the silence. “The Queen wishes to see you, Riznah. I will bring you to her now.” She paused, then almost in a whisper added, “I’m so sorry.”
Taking his left pincer in her right, she led him quickly away. Meira watched them go with a frightened look on her face, as though she still couldn’t believe what she had heard.
What was going on? Riznah couldn’t make sense of the situation, and Nashta wouldn’t say a word the whole time they walked together. Obviously he had said something that caught the sisters off guard, but what was it, and why in the world did Nashta apologize to him?
Nashta set a quick pace, and soon they were in the Great Hall where his eyes had opened for the first time. The Queen wasn’t there, and the line of cocoon-bearing laborers parted to let them pass. He thought he saw Jeerd, but the brother didn’t acknowledge his questioning glance. As they neared the wall at the widest point of the tunnel, two hulking brothers that Riznah knew must be Warriors stepped aside to reveal a small antechamber. Nashta stopped at the entrance and shoved Riznah inside where he found himself once again in the presence of his beautiful queen. He recognized her majestic voice instantly.
“What have you done, Riznah?” she asked tenderly.
He was at a loss for words. After a moment he simply said, “I don’t know. Is this all because I asked about those other Hives?”
The queen shook her head and looked at him with pity in her perfect eyes. “Poor child. You have no idea. Zirx never do.”
“What is Zirx, your Majesty?”
“Zirx is the name we give to all who ask the question Why. My memory, or the memory of the Hive that I inherited, is ancient. It goes back to a time before the Music, when the needs of the Hive were secondary to the desires of individual brothers and sisters. When the Hive was almost destroyed by selfishness, our ancestors developed the Music to replace our need for Why. They established the Order of the Hive, and we have continued on ever since; perfectly happy in our Assignments.”
Riznah didn’t know how to feel; this was all happening much too quickly.
The Queen continued, “Occasionally one such as you is born who hears the Music but is not satisfied. Although you don’t know it yourself, eventually you will question every aspect of you and the world around you. You will question the Order of the Hive. There is no help for it, that is just the nature of who you are.”
Riznah hung his head in bitter anguish as the Queen pronounced his sentence.
“You cannot be a part of our family, as the essence of the Order requires exact obedience without question. As soon as one Zirx is allowed to stay, questions spread, for the most contagious word that we can think is Why. The needs of the individual are secondary to the needs of the Hive. I have no choice but to take the Music from you and cast you out. Please know I wish it were otherwise”
With that, the Queen reached out lovingly and touched his antennae with her own. Again, electric sparks visited every part of his body. When the Queen withdrew from contact and the current left him, Riznah winced, then clapped his pincers to his head and collapsed to the ground; writhing and crying out in agony. But no voice of comfort came into his mind; no calming melody responded to the questions he screamed with his thoughts. And the music; the deep, pure music that had filled his soul with purpose, was gone. In its place came a terrible discordant clashing, grinding, and screeching. It filled him until his only thought was to become extinct. Somehow he must find a way to end this agony; to end himself. He was unaware as the two guards entered the room and lifted him between them. He didn’t see the miles of tunnel wall they passed as he was dragged along until he was tossed out into open air. He didn’t regain consciousness when he landed on a pile of empty exoskeletons; the remains of generations of Zirx cast out before him.

Impressum

Tag der Veröffentlichung: 04.02.2012

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