She had married her high school sweetheart and thought she was going to be married "til death do us part" just like her vows had said but eight years later she found herself divorced, alone and scared. She had a handful of serious relationships over the course of the last ten years and even though three of the men had spoken about marriage, she wasn't in a place where she was ready to get re-married. Between work, raising her kids and their schedules, her life was busy and they kept her hopping. For the most part she did not have time to think about her personal life or lack there of. But year after year that passed it made her think about the missed opportunities in her life and it caused her to think more and more about finding someone to share her life with. She really was tired of sleeping alone and wanted someone to come home to that could hug and kiss away the stresses of her day, she wanted the companionship of sharing her deepest desires and secrets with. She missed having a man to fall asleep next to and to wake up next to, she missed the feeling of his strong arms around her, holding her close and tight to him. One night, feeling lonely she decided to try her luck at online dating. She found a web site, set up her profile and just threw it out there like a lure hoping to find a great "catch". A few days later she checked and there was a message waiting for her, she opened it expecting to be disappointed but was pleasantly surprised. On her screen was an attractive man with the most amazing eyes she had ever seen, as she read the message she thought "what the hell" and decided to check out his profile. There were so many things that they shared in common she decided to message him back, that was how it started. It was innocent enough in the beginning, a few messages which led to e-mails that led to talking on instant messenger. They had talked for awhile and shared several things about themselves to each other. They lived in the same state but he was out of the country working and would not be back in state for a month or so. While she was not expecting to find the man of her dreams online, she was hoping she could find someone to spend her time with. But the more and more she learned about this man, the more and more she let herself be drawn into him, believing in him, missing him and wanting him. They talked about what the future could hold for them but then the day came when there was nothing in her in-box, then the next day-nothing, the day after that-still nothing. She was devastated. What happened? The only thing she could think of was a few nights before he had asked her for money, he needed it for a family emergency but she didn't have any extra to give, she was supporting her kids by herself and needed her money to take care of them and their needs. At the time he said "OK, I understand" but his silence told her that it wasn't, she tried to e-mail him a couple of times, the first just checking on him and the last to say good-bye. Tears fell on her keyboard as she typed the final words to this man who had made her smile just by thinking of him, still not wanting to believe this man who had seemed so genuine and sincere had been just lying to her. It was hard to swallow, she was always so cautious and careful and usually did not fall for bullshit but this one got to her. Everything he said was what she was looking for, it was like he could read her mind or they were connected on a deeper level. Since he had never tried to entice her into cyber sex she thought he was really into her on a deeper level not just for his own sexual satisfaction. But as the days dragged on she realized he had in fact screwed her emotionally. She wondered if he had meant anything he had said or did he get some sick sort of fascination with playing with her head and emotions. She would eventually move on and put this nightmare behind her she knew because she was strong and resilient but she made a promise to herself that she would not invest her emotions again when she went looking for "love over the line."

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Tag der Veröffentlichung: 02.05.2010

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