1. The Cat Woman from Mars

"Major Dare ready to report, Sir." He saluted.

"At ease." The Air Force colonel's cold gray eyes bored into the airman. "You shot it down?"

"Yes, Sir! I intercepted the flying saucer at 25,000 feet. It’s spread out all over the desert."

The colonel slammed his fist onto the desktop. “Those damn Martian cat women! They’ll never take over this world if I have anything to do with it.”

“Yes, Sir!”

“Good job, Major. Go home. Get some sleep.”

The major followed orders and went home to sleep--with the sexy Martian cat woman he’d saved after shooting down her saucer.

2. Daughter of the 50-foot Woman

"What's your project this time, Ed?"

Filmmaker Ed Woods lit a cigarette. "A sequel to 'Attack of the 50-foot Woman' called 'Daughter of the 50-foot Woman.'"

"Well, I can only kick in about $5,000 this time."

"But I need at least double that!"

"Why don't you put hookers in the cast like the last time? I heard they loved working in a movie where they didn't have to stare at the ceiling."

“How about $10,000?”

"No can do."

Ed brainstormed it. He eventually made a film about a high school kid that turned into a sex-crazed werewolf after smoking joints.

3. The Glob

The Glob fell from the sky one night and immediately began terrorizing the townspeople. It froze them to death with its touch.

"Where's it now, Sheriff?"

"Inside the supermarket."

"That thing's like a big lump of Jell-O. Why not melt it with fire hoses?"

"Good idea, Doc, but hurry before it returns.”

The fire hoses worked and the Glob became a pile of slush.

“Guess that thing froze four people to death,” the sheriff said.

"There’s a fifth one."

"Who?"

"Harriet. We found her frozen too."

The sheriff nodded. "A shame...but then she always was on the frigid side."

Impressum

Tag der Veröffentlichung: 26.08.2010

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