Cereal for Mureal

 

Howdy to you all!

I am not vey small.

As a vey big star

I have come vey far.

My boots are high healed

And I live in a field

Flashing lights and a stage

Since I was almost three in age.

So let’s turn back the page

So I can tell ya’ll how I became a mage.

I had dreams of singen

Not the normal word slingen

County singen

Yes the sweet bringen!

The beautiful sticks

Along with the beautiful… hicks?

Anyway let’s get back on track

Before the chef makes a snack

Three years and four months

Me and my ma lived in the dumps

It was hard timen and strife

No pa and hardly a life.

Not even a cent to our name

Me and ma wandered dirt roads in shame.

One day ma put me in bed

That is when she said,

“You ain't no girl of mine,

If you ain't gunna shine!”

She yanked and brushed my hair

That’s when I said, “Momma, I swear!”

Sassy and an ol’ cus she was

She slapped my face for just because

Later we met a man down south

He had an abnormally large mouth

His hat could hold ten gallons

And his nails were so long, they looked like talons

He took me by the shoulders

And shook me like a bag of boulders

With ma right beside me

I thought I might pee

But she told me to be good

And I said I understood

With just one look

She put me in a nook

The man said, “I’m your daddy now!”

In the back a cat said, “Meow!”

I looked at ma confused

She looked back just as bemused

So let’s jump ahead a year or two

To when I became extremely blue

I was beautiful as a child

But sadly I was restyled

I am in a need for braces

My teeth shouldn’t belong to any girl faces

A cute little freckle on my right cheek

The one that made me look super chic

Grew into a gruesome mole

It tries to jump into my cereal bowl!

But sadly when it succeeds

Another one always breeds

I love cereal so much!

Especially when it’s Dutch

It helps my face lip sync

Oh, I mean sing…

Let’s face it that’s something from my shrink

There goes my tractor about to sink

I can’t sing worth a darn

Maybe because I was born in a barn

I can howl and I can hoo!

But for some strange reason I can never moo.

My horse sings better than I can

His beautiful name is Dan

He’s not your normal horse

You see he’s a flyen Pegasus of course!

He runs and he jumps and goes like, “Nay!”

And his favorite snack is a big bail of hay

Well since I'm sharen so may secrets

I’ll tell you now I have many regrets

How is my syncing, (I mean singing) career so big?

I’m not really sure let me ask my pig

Silly pig you don’t eat albedo

Good gracias all mighty you’re a weirdo!

Anyways my manager is sick

As in he’s kinda a di… duck! He’s a duck.

He called me ugly and kicked me out

So I'm letten myself go and becomen stout

As you can see my misfortune lies

Within the gods, their eyes

No unfortunate misdeed is responsible

Only unfortunate genes are understandable

Dan was like “Nay!”

And I said “Yay!”

So I jumped on my horse and here I am

Asken them gods a favor like, BAM!

Zeus looked at me and said

“What are you doing out of bed?

Your name is Mureal!”

“Ha!” I said, “Look, Mr. Managerial

My name may be Mureal,”

I stopped to think than said, “But all I want is a big bowl of cereal!”

“Really? That’s all you want?”

“Sir, if I wanted more, I’d go to a restaurant.”

So he snapped his fingers

And I went “Bajingers!”

There in front of me

Sweeter than a honey bee

The biggest bowl of sugary cereal

For this BIG SUGARY MUREAL!

I took a bite

And what a fright!

My mole disappeared and my teeth went straight

And appeared next to me was a handsome mate

Now I can sing mighty fine!

So Zeus, pour the wine!

 

Happy as a Clam!

Cliché:  Happy as a clam!

 

Once there was a sailor who loved the sight of open sea, the smell of salt water, and the spray of mist on his skin. He would go out to sea for months at a time and unlike many of his crew, he didn’t have a wife or kids of his own so leaving his shack of a house and exploring open waters on his ship wasn’t a hassle, but a joy. The sea was his real home. This sailor's name was Arnold. Arnold was a man of many joys, but when he was out at sea his favorite thing to do was sit on the deck of the ship at night and listen for the musical sounds of mermaids singing in a language unknown to him. He would sit and listen until he either grew too tired or one of his men found him slumped against the side of the ship and helped him back to his cabin.        

    Arnold always had a big toothy smile on his face. Most of the time it was for nothing at all, he just loved to be happy. One day a fellow sailor asked him why he was so happy and he replied, “Because I love to see the sea and the sky and most of all the silly seals playing on the ocean waves.” The sailor looked at Arnold like he was crazy, and maybe he was… just a little.

    As his large sleek ship sailed across the choppy waves of the sea Arnold noticed to his dismay the mermaid’s song wasn’t as loud in stormy conditions. The rain poured down as if a great water bucket were being emptied out into the raging sea from the sky. The wind was a howling wolf alone on the arch of each crashing wave; and the ocean itself was a poorly light pathway of moonlight as twisted as a gypsy’s ribbon. The ship rocked dangerously with each torrent of whipping wind. Arnold stayed on deck all night through the storm waiting for the beautiful night song of the sea. Sadly he never heard it.

In the morning Arnold’s clothing was soaked through to his skin. He was laying on his back and he felt the soft rise and fall of the ship under him. His nostrils stung with salt and his eyes were plastered shut with crust from tears so pitifully shed for the song he longed to hear. He rubbed his face and sat up on his elbow. The ship seemed to be very unsteady this morning because when he pulled himself up into a sitting position he almost fell back on his elbows, and to his surprise, he rolled sideways and fell straight into freezing cold salt water. He had been on a piece of driftwood not his ship.

He pulled himself back onto the piece of driftwood, which he realized was actually part of his ship, or it had been part of his ship. He lay down on his stomach and stretched his legs and fingertips into the water. He smiled, ‘What a nice day.’ he thought to himself. He lay on his stomach for hours just listening to the ocean lap at his makeshift boat and felt the sun bare down on the back of his neck. As soon as the sun started to set Arnold closed his eyes and imagined he could hear the musical sounds of mermaids singing. ‘What a beautiful song.’ he thought to himself, ‘If only it were real.’ He laid completely still and hummed along to the tuneless melody. Than he listened closer. The song wasn’t imagined at all.

All around him the song could be heard. He lifted his head and crawled farther onto the driftwood to look into the water. Deep in the gloomy water was a sparkling blue fish. Arnold was awestruck by its beauty, the way it swirled and gracefully moved with the waves was hypnotizing. He smiled and watched it move along the darkened water. The sun was now gone and the moon had appeared on the horizon. There were no clouds in the sky and the first star was starting to appear. The mermaid’s song was very loud and sweet, it was so loud in fact, he almost had to cover his ears.

He looked down at the fish which seemed to be glowing under the moonlight; he had never seen something so dazzling. The fish was moving in a figure eight right under him and was slowly moving closer to the surface of the water. As the fish made its way closer to the surface its form seemed to morfe. It grew larger and as it surfaced just a few feet away it took the form of an alluring young woman. As soon as her head surfaced the song stopped.

Arnold was very surprised to see a young woman at sea and didn’t know what to do. The girl smiled showing perfect teeth her eyes glowing as white as mother-of-pearl. Her hair was as black as the midnight sky with shining pieces silver intertwined in her delicate flowing locks. “Hello.” The creature said in a musical watery voice.

“Hello,” Arnold replied automatically. “What’s your name?” he didn’t know what else to say. The girl laughed and swam closer.

“My name?” she asked, “You find a girl in the middle of the ocean and you ask for her name?” she raised a slender eyebrow questioningly. He was on his hands and knees his eyes wide.

“Yes.” Arnold answered nodding his head vigorously. The girl was close enough that Arnold could reach out and touch her, and no matter how much he wanted to, he stayed his hand. The girl laughed again resting her head on the edge of the driftwood.

“Do you know what a clam is?” Arnold blinked in confusion at the strange question. When he didn’t answer, the mermaid said, “My name is Brilla.” Arnold just stared at her. She cocked her head gazing at him expectantly.

“Oh!” Arnold exclaimed, “I'm Arnold.” he put his right hand out to her. Brilla’s eyebrows went together as she cautiously reached for his hand. She gripped it and then smiling, yanked Arnold off his little makeshift raft.

The mermaid Brilla was pulling Arnold down far beneath the crashing waves of the sea, he held his breath. The water grew darker and the pressure on Arnold’s head grew greater. She pulled him twisting and turning on invisible currents, going so deep he thought for sure his lungs would burst. But at the last second she slanted upright and the pressure on his skull started to decrease. In the distance was a shimmering light. As they got closer Arnold realized it was a tall platform made of sand, it had a seaweed wall on the top.

The mermaid could tell Arnold was having trouble holding his breath so with haste she swam quickly toward the wall of seaweed. As soon as their feet hit the pillar of sand, Arnold could breathe easily. The thick seaweed produced so much oxygen as long as he didn’t talk he would be fine. He smiled.

“So do you know what a clam is or not?” Brilla asked the sailor. Arnold opened his mouth to speak but was halted by the salty water, so he just shook his head ‘yes’. The mermaid whistled and instead of a dogfish a giant clam came, jumping up and down shaking with joy.    

Arnold awoke to the sound of waves crashing against burning white sand.

So you see, happy as a clam was made by a maddened and shipwrecked sailor who believed in mermaids. Therefore if you feel crazy saying “I’m as happy as a clam!” you may need serious help; but as long as you don’t hear mermaids or see giant clams, you should be fine.

The Joker, Jinx and, The Puppit King

Hybrid Story  

 

The Joker was very quiet. It was a rare to see him sit still for more than a minute or two; but keeping quiet in this situation would benefit him greatly. He was pressed up against the black wall of a dark hallway. He closed his eyes and stifled a laugh. The floor under him was smooth Plexiglas that resembled the inside of a beehive, yellow lights emphasizing the shapes. The Joker inched his way toward the end of the hallway being extra careful not to leave the wall. At the end of the hallway there was a large opening into another hallway. Joker peeked around the corner smiling. The hallway was clear so he jumped out from around the corner, the yellow glow from the floor making his pasty white face the color of rotting foliage.

He walked, almost skipped, down the hallway. The walls where lined with closed doors. The Joker backed up to one of the doors and jiggled the handle. It was locked. He frowned and quickly smiled again laughing loudly. He covered his mouth with his gloved hand and looked left then right. When he was satisfied no one heard him he tried the door next to it. It wouldn’t open so he tried the next, and the next, and the next. All of them were locked. He made an impatient noise and slapped his hands on his thighs not knowing what to do. Without thinking he started to whistle and stroll deeper into the heart of the H.I.V.E.

The sound of footsteps reverberated off the walls around the Joker. He stopped in his tracks as two guards in black and yellow colored uniforms stepped out from behind a door. The guards had vicious looking guns that matched the black and yellow ensemble. The Joker’s smile grew as he pulled out some kind of knife and retreated into a doorway and tried the door, it was locked so he waited in the shadows. The guards said nothing to each other but walked in sync, the heels on their shiny black boots clicking simultaneously. The Joker’s smile was almost touching his ears; his huge teeth seemed to glow in the gloom. The guards were closer now and the Joker was ready to strike. The guards never turned their heads to the left or the right and walked right by his gleaming knife.

Disappointment filled the Joker as he watched the two warm bodied guards walk away with a purpose in their step. The Joker stuffed the knife back into his purple jacket and put his hands into his pockets. Then he turned on his heel and walked the direction the guards had come from. He whistled a tuneless song wondering if the guards could hear him. Stopping at the door they had come through, Joker tested the handle and to his surprise it was unlocked. He triumphantly gripped the handle and swung the door open with a bang and a yell. Blackness covered the entire room and he heard nothing. He stuck his head over the threshold and raised his eyebrows. He felt for a light switch and found nothing but bare wall.

The Joker stepped in the room slowly and walked with his hands outstretched so he wouldn’t trip over anything. He took a few paces and was stopped in his tracks by an invisible wall of nothing. He hit it and felt like a mime trying to get free of an imaginary box. That thought made him feel silly because after all he was clown not a mime. He laughed at his own joke, the cackle sounding off the walls.

After a few moments of laughing and banging his fist against the force field, a pink light illuminated part of the large room stopping the Joker midlaugh. He stared at it intently, not knowing what to think of it, his black lined eyes squinting in confusion. The light grew and illuminated even more of the room which was very square and very empty. The pink light was stunning so the Joker shielded his eyes with his purple sleeve. He couldn’t see and with his eyes closed he ran for the door.

As he reached the door an explosion went off behind him sending him flying across the hall into the adjacent door. It was a hard hit that sent tremors of laughter through the Joker’s trembling body. There was smoke in the air and the smell of burnt lavender was overwhelming. He heard footsteps approaching from the direction he was thrown. Dark clouds of pink smoke spiraled inside the damaged doorway, he couldn’t see who was approaching him. He sat with one knee up and one leg stretched out in front of him, his head resting against the door.

“Didn’t expect to see you here,” said a high voice. “Joker.” The Joker looked up and saw a young girl with pink hair and matching pink eyes. Her dark blue dress and boots were shining in the yellow light that emanated from the floor. Jinx was someone the Joker was hoping to run into; a challenge. “Brother Blood wouldn’t be happy to see you in his sanctuary.” Jinx said staring Joker down.

“Oh, I’m sure he wouldn’t,” the Joker said laughing. “not when I'm here to steal some of his ‘so called’ magic.” He stood with a smile on his face. “You see he has something I want, no scratch that, something a need; desperately.” He took a step forward with a flourish of his coat tails carelessly waving his hand in the air. He circled Jinx with an air of arrogance. “My dear spiky head,” he said commenting on her two spiked pigtails bowing low to the ground, “I would love to stay and chat about Mr. Blood’s insecurities but I have a schedule to keep.” The Joker wiped off the dirt and grime from his fitted purple suit and green vest then sticking his hands in his pockets turned on his heel and started to walk away whistling.

He took a few steps further down the hallway. Jinx stared after him confused and slightly annoyed. “Wait!” she yelled, “you can’t be in here!” Jinx ran forward after the Joker. Before she could reach him he turned and threw a little round ball and as it hit the floor it exploded into a wall of purple and green smoke. Jinx started to giggle and cough, she couldn’t control it. She soon broke down into hysterical laughter that made her eyes water and her stomach hurt; and she had no choice but to sit on the floor and take it.

The Joker ran down the hallway laughing with his nose in the air. He ran by closed door after closed door searching for an exit sign, but he found none. Than something caught his eye; a glowing pink exit sign over massive double doors. The Joker made his way over to the door skipping. He stopped, looking at the strange pink sign. There was a faint glow coming from under the doors and where the two doors met. The Joker examined the round crystal doorknobs closely. He reached for the one on the right and turned it slowly. He opened the door slowly and it creaked with age. The light that was shining through the door was almost unearthly it was so bright; it was as if the sun had fallen from the sky and was now in the H.I.V.E.’s possession.

The Joker shielded his eyes from the great light that illuminated the large white room. In the center of the room sat a small hunched over man leaning against the source of the white light. The little man didn’t move or seem to notice him, so the Joker walked deeper into the room, the door closing behind him with a squeak. The Joker’s eyes adjusted the farther he went into the room.

This was it. The Joker had found what he was looking for, The Puppet King. Now the Joker couldn’t leave. He had to get the little wooden figure had to be his! The Puppet King was one of the ultimate magical instruments that Brother Blood found and has been keeping it under lock-and-key, selfishly. ‘This kind of power needs to be released for everyone to tremble before! When I the amazing and hilarious Joker release him he shall be in my debt forever! Batman will finally fall and Gotham City with him. I always win!’

The Joker rubbed his hands together greedily and walked to the center of the room to where the little wooden man sat motionless staring at nothing. “Hello, Mr. Puppet King, Sir.” Joker bowed low mockingly. “I think its time for a little wakeup call.” The Joker smiled with a laugh and pulled a small purple bomb from a pocket in his suit coat. There was a click and he threw it over his shoulder carelessly. Than he put his hands in his pants pockets and lazily took a few steps around the lifeless puppet, waiting for the boom. He smiled as he counted to five then he crouched and covered his ears laughing wildly. Nothing, not even a small rumble shook him. He stood and looked to where he had thrown the bomb and there stood the girl with two spiky pink pigtails. Jinx was holding back laughter and a cough. She held her hand out the palm facing down, her eyes were glowing pink. The Joker looked at her with an evil smile his teeth yellow and his green eyes menacing.

“Now, now little girl why don’t you go play with your dollies and leave a man to do his work, Hmmm?” his voice was not harsh but very degrading.

“Dollies?” Jinx asked in disgust, “What would I need dollies for when I can play ball?” she moved her hand backwards her eyes glowing intensely than flung her hand forward with a graceful leap and released the Joker’s own bomb sending it flying toward his head. His eyes widened and he laughed jumping out of the way. He landed on his feet but fell forward onto his hands and knees. Jinx yelled a battle cry as she lunged forward sending a bright pink ball of energy flying for the Joker. Joker tucked his arms under him and rolled away to safety. Jinx had the Joker pinned against a wall, she smiled a sweet smile.

“Give up yet?” she asked. The Joker smiled.

“Do you?”

“What do you mean, you stupid cl…” Jinx was stopped mid sentence. She fell sideways landing hard, out cold.

“Well look who finally decided to join us,” Joker was eye level with the Puppet King on his knees. “o’ great king.” he made another mock bow. The Puppet King stared at him with big black empty eyes. The Joker looked up smiling at him. Then the Puppet King did the most unexpected thing the Joker could think of, he slapped the Joker. His little wooden hand leaving splinters in his scarred cheek. Joker fell backwards off his knees in shock.

The Puppet King laughed an evil laugh that made even the Joker shiver with fear. All light in the room was suddenly snuffed out with an invisible source of wind. The Puppet King walked forward still laughing at the Joker. The Joker tried to move his arms to push himself off the ground but found it impossible. In fact he couldn’t move anything at all. He tried to smile but couldn’t even do that. He moved his eyes toward Jinx who was stirring awake. She stood but didn’t move to wipe off the dirt from her dark dress, she turned to the Joker and to his surprise her eyes no longer held the color of a pink sunset but the color of a blue morning sky. Her face was expressionless.

The puppet King moved his hand just a twitch and made the Joker stand at attention. Jinx moved toward him. The Joker tried to laugh but all that came out was a low strain of uneven humming noises. The Puppet King moved both Jinx and Joker toward the a door on the other side of the room. Upon reaching it the Joker was no longer in his body.

Jinx opened the door and took a step in. Joker and the Puppet King followed after her. The room was dark except for a single beam of light that illuminated a large round platform. The Puppet King and his two prisoners moved over to the base of the platform.

“Who do we have here,” a man’s voice came from somewhere near the platform. “Rumplestiltskin?” The Puppet King bowed and said in a scratchy voice,

“This one came and tried to capture me like you said he would,” he motioned to the Joker and then to Jinx. “This is one of yours.” Both the Joker and Jinx stood with their eyes glowing blue. There was a laugh and a sinister looking man appeared on the platform. He was balding slightly and his hair was grey. He had a pointy nose and lips that turned at the corners giving him an air of arrogance. He moved forward to the very edge of the platform, his white robes flowing behind him.

“You may release to me what is mine, but you know what to do with the other one.”

“Yes master.” The Puppet King bowed his head and with a wave of his hand, Jinx gasped and fell forward to her knees coughing. The Puppet King stared at her unsympathetically then turned and walked farther into the dark room. Jinx stood and in a raspy voice said,

“Another one for your collection.” she looked up at the man with a smile. “How did I do?”

“Very well.” The man said turning his blood red eyes to her, not unkindly. Jinx blushed and bowed her head. The sound of lights being turned on resounded through the room and bright yellow light slowly appeared.

“What is your plan for him?” Jinx asked, “With the Joker, I mean.”

“You will see young one,” Brother Blood looked around the yellow and black room admiring all the villains and heroes he had captured using an ancient wooden puppet as bait. He chuckled. “You will see.”   

Vingnettes 3

A Flower’s Petals

    I stand at the window and watch as things fly by. Black and white, gold and silver. I am plain and my clothes are like smoke from a fire, but I am free just as you are. Free as the endless sheet of blue that reflects to my eyes. It is very blue, blue like me. Is that a blue butterfly? Maybe not. It could be a blue aunt or great grandmother as blue as I am. People say appearance is everything, but I say it is more than that. After all we are all just life within a life within a life.

 I am a wildflower that grows without a care of how old I may become, an endless figure eight. Every once in a while a weed will pop in next to me and scare away my beauty, but then that weed is able to help mould and shape me, making my roots stronger. Black and white, gold and silver. The petals of a flower are insignificant to its real beauty. So that is why I am standing here watching things fly by. I am free of my petals just like a wild flower.     

 

Science is a strange thing...

Science is a strange thing. It tells you yes, and then it tells you no. Sometimes it says yes and no at the same time. Science and scientists are strange things indeed. I am in over my head everyone knows it. Sara knows it, Kayti knows it, even Sam knows it. Beakers and test tubes I am an experiment gone bad. Left to my own devices. Alone. My friends always say you need to get out more, and get a life. Sometimes I wonder if they are really my friends. Lazy that is what they are, plain old lazy. They are the ones who need to get out more and get a life. They need to learn how to make pancakes and how to poach an egg. I know how to do both of those things and yet I am still lonely. I am ready for life are they? No! I guess I need to learn to be lonely and be my own companion. Who needs them anyway friends and family eventually leave. Genetics that’s what it is. It’s in my genes to be alone. Science is a strange thing indeed.

 

Forgiveness

I stand and walk to the window. I reach out and stroke the smooth cool glass. What are you doing? Sara asks. Just looking out the window, I say to the window. I watch as things fly by. She and Kayti talk as I don’t pay attention to their words. They talk about their lives and their families lives but they never listen to mine. They expect me to listen but then don’t listen to me. I whine and complain silently in my head. They aren’t my friends… Silly Sara and kind Kayti, they don’t listen. They say they are sorry for me but I know they aren’t, they just say I deserved it. No I didn’t. Did I deserve being called names and being teased and tormented relentlessly? No! So the two girls talk to each other, ignoring me ignoring them. I no longer care and honestly I forgive them. So as they look through me I finally fade into the endless blue sheet and watch the ground and everything else fade behind underneath me.

Impressum

Texte: brianne k robertson
Bildmaterialien: Brianne Robertson
Lektorat: Brianne Robertson/Jared Scow
Tag der Veröffentlichung: 26.06.2018

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