Being bullied is horrible. Being treated like you are a big pile of... poop
is even worse.
I am often treated like I am so disgusting that if someone so much as touches me, they will freak out and act like they were just contaminated with the most horrible disease imaginable. I don't know why they did this to me. I guess they loved to watch me cry.
I remember that it just started suddenly, with no warning whatsoever. One day, I went to sit down at a table at lunch, and everyone sitting at that table got up and moved to a different table. I thought it was just a coincidence, until the next day. I sat down at a table with people once again, and they all moved away. That time, some of them were even laughing at me. After several weeks of that, I gave up and sat at a table all alone. The table remained empty all during lunch. No one would even sit at a table near mine. There were empty tables all around me.
They would sneer when they saw me sitting alone at my table, and laugh when they saw me start crying. I could barely eat anymore. I didn't understand what I had done wrong. I still don't. All I know is that it caused a lot more pain than one would think. But.... that was nowhere near the worst of it. Not at all. The hallways is where the worst of it took place. The teachers who noticed just passed it off as nothing out of the ordinary... but I knew what was happening. It was
directed towards me after all. The teachers couldn't have done anything anyways. How does someone stop people from acting like someone is the human form of a disgusting disease?
You see... the cruelest thing they did... was a complete shun. They would say "Did you hear something?" whenever I said something. Always, someone would respond "No, it was just the wind." They would make a wide berth around me to avoid me, and if they touched me... that was the worst part. When they touched me, they would act like they had just touched the most disgusting substance on earth. That is what I was (and still am) to them. Absolutely disgusting.
They hated me so much... and they made it so clear. Some still do, even though the main person behind it all (David, who will be told about in part two of this series) is now gone.I still sit alone most days at lunch. I sit on the floor instead of at a table, or in the corner of the stage area. Yes, I do wish I did not have to sit alone, but I know that it will be just the same as before. Believe me, I tried. They moved away once again. People tell me to go socialize... but how can I socialize with people who want nothing to do with me? My friends are so few... and they will not help me when I am alone. They will leave me there.
Bildmaterialien: picture on cover is of Jazz Z. Paddock. (meant to be blurry)
Tag der Veröffentlichung: 16.05.2012
Alle Rechte vorbehalten
Widmung:
I dedicate this to all my friends who realize how badly something like this hurts.