It hurts when someone abuses your loved one. I was sitting beside my self-caring sister and before a Sony television. A beauty soap advertisement flashed on screen, my mother and my brother smiled in notorious manner. My father passed a comment—“these types of girls marry almost twenty to twenty-five times in their life.” My sister gazed me for a second then turned her eyes to screen. Even though it was a mere joke but it casts me down.
My infatuation, my classmate, leads me to love her. She has shared a seat with me since the fourth class in high school. I developed my first attraction; a soft corner within my heart for her. But somebody has stolen her heart before me. She revealed it in high school. His name, all I know about him. To forget her, I loved that actress in my fantasies.
I loved her more than my life. I collected her photos, images, and stickers. I got three road accidents in her muse, I broke my knees, get a head injury, and a disease related to brain that I can’t ever spell accurately. I disconnected myself from other parts of my life, I wasted my nights in her dreams, I talked to her in my daydreams and ignored everybody but her. People care themselves when they have fallen in love but I carelessly fade out in her muse.
Everybody speaks ill about her because she is in the hall of fame. Anybody, who has a mouth and words in their dictionaries they poked against her, abuses her. Even my only best friend, in this new city, does the same sometimes. People who know me have gradually sensed my weak point. They used to tease me abundantly. They do that for fun, I know, but these jokes hurts me badly.
I realized and accepted, she can never be my love, after two years of hypnotic trance, I finally realized she’s completely out of my league, ten years older than me and she had a long list of break-up and patch-up. I almost forget her, just can’t stop me watching her shows and performance, liking her photos on Facebook.
I pretend to smile in the studio and pretend to laugh, which even made me weep. I cleverly wiped my tears and rushed to the washroom. I ruined my career for her. What I want? Just few words of sympathy. A thirst of beholding her and telling how much I love her, nothing more. I am pretending my life, want to involve, I catch everybody’s attention but feared to talk.
Thanks
Texte: shishir kumar
Tag der Veröffentlichung: 22.01.2013
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