Chapter 1

It was the middle of summer. Mother had finally made the divorce final, a few weeks ago and had moved in with the person who she stated ' Made her happy and feel secure.' That was Micheal Gordon. He was the owner of one of the best law firms in America and was a millionaire. So, now i saw where love came in.

I layed in bed, thinking about dinner the previous night. We had all gathered around the dining room table for a evening dinner when Cameron and Anna burst through the doors, laughing like crazy. Cameron was my sexy step brother, who I constantly dreamed about and it constantly left me in a state of mind of feeling guilty for the next 10 minutes and then I'll do it again.

Anna on the other hand was the whore I couldn't stand and I wished so innocently will just be walking home one day and get hit by a bus. I don't have no idea what Cameron saw in her but I guess it was something special cause I remembered walking pass the garage and hearing them talking before I heard moans and grunts and that was all it took to get me walking again.

Cameron had came home drunk again and after getting a good scolding from Micheal, that everyone heard was sent back to assist the drunk Anna home after sobering up . And all through my  head I kept thinking ahe wasn't drunk, let her walk home, in the dark, at night, drunk but before I could get the guts to put my thoughts to word he was gone. 

Cameron had returned later on with a sour look on his face until he walked pass my door and slammed his blocking out everyone for the night and I knew he had been punished severely.

That brought me to today. Mother and Micheal had just left for a big function kind of ceremony shit and I was left with Cameron here to watch over me. And Cameron was never home unless he was hungry, dinner time,bed time or he was out of his mind drunk.Cameron was like the bad boy everyone wanted in their life including his step-sister, who he thought was the sweetest person person he has ever met and was completely innocent, who couldn't take care care of herself. Bullshit, I thought, you just don't know me and I wish to God you stop and look at me different for once.

Cameron, I thought dreamily. Your blue eyes, and devilishly handsome looks. Your perfect lips I wanted so bad to kiss and make mine. He looked like a Greek God from out of those stories I learnt at school before final exams. With his always tossled brown hair, that I wanted to rub my fingers through and grip so tightly when you've decided to take me. My body and my soul. That perfect body that looked like it was made to connect with mine. I fucking hope Anna enjoyes him because I wish I could. 

Why did we have to have any family relations but even if we didn't he wouldn't take a second glance at me.  He was out of my league. I stood up from bed and walked to my full length mirror studying myself.

I was medium height, with tall brown hair that caught me at my waist, and dazzling blue eyes. I looked deeper at my image. I was some what called a late bloomer so my breast weren't as large as his girlfriend's Anna but the ordinary size. Not too big and not too small. I lifted my shirt up to examine my body closer. My belly was flat and at the corner of  my side was a tattoo of a butterfly that mother didn't know about.

I didn't have a big ass but what I had would do. My legs were smooth  and long. I didn't need to shave as often as some girls because my hair down there didn't grow all that much.  I was very pale because of my sickness. Overall, I was attractive but although that was so, I couldn't date him or even had filthy thoughts about him because of the guilt, but it was impossible not to.

Chapter 2

I sighed and pulled down my big white T-shirt and pulled on a short shorts. I'm not a goodie goodie girl Cameron, I thought. The T-shirt made it seemed as though I had on no underwear or anything. I walked out my room heading down the long hall. I passed Cameron's room realizing that it was open but he wasn't in there. I looked around and then walked in when I thought it was safe enough. Posters, C-D's and cords attached to different technology was all over the place. Other than that it was relatively clean. I went to his bed and touched it gently making my hand glide over his neatly fixed sheets before sitting down.

It was soft and the whole room smelt of Cameron. I layed down gently resting my head on his pillow. Why can't I have you? I thought and before I could stop it a tear fell from my eyes. I love you, I thought again, but I don't know why.

I sat up putting my foot up on his bed. I folded them under me and played with his sheet, my back turned towards the door. Another tear fell and another. I sniffled.

"Mandy?" someone murmured gently.

I spun around to find Cameron standing at his door, with a confused expression on his face and only a pants on. His bare chest outside revealing his 6 or was it 8 pack abs.

"Cameron," I squeaked," I'm so-"

"What's wrong?" he asked looking at me intensly.

I couldn't hold his gaze so I looked down on my hand, playing with it nervously, while chewing on my lips. Bad habits, I thought. I heard his footsteps coming closer. I tensed and looked down focusing all my attention on my hand like it was the funnest thing in the world. I felt him sit on the bed next to me.

"Amanda," he said calling me by my real name," please tell me what's wrong, Mandy."

"I can't," I said, getting up from the bed.

I was almost to my feet when he stopped me by grabbing ahold of my arm.

"Why not?" he asked looking up at me with his dazzling blue eyes.

Another tear fell as I looked at him looking at me. I love you, I thought, and I really can't help it but I do.

"Because it's wrong," I whispered pulling my arm out from his hold,"I'm going to the pool," I said, not looking at him," But I won't swim," I added seeing his expression.

"I will find out, you know," he murmered.

I widened my eyes in horror because I knew he would. He would watch me like a hawk until I told him everything that satisfied him and I knw this because he did it to me once before and I cried which he knew I barely did and guess whose arms comforted me that night. Cameron's.

"Goodluck with that," I answered him.

 

 

Chapter 3

 

I walked out back in the hall, feeling crushed and sad. I wanted to sink into the floor and die but before I could do anything I saw Anna walking, swaying her hips towards his door. What did she have that I didn’t?

   A bitchy attitude, a nice figure, big boobs, tight ass and a gorgeous face, Oh, shit, I thought, I lose, and with that I walked back in my room to get my sun tan lotion. I came out only to catch Cameron in the middle of a very hot make out session while rubbing his body onto hers while she moaned. His room door was wide open and this was like watching my mother hang herself. It was that painful. I took hold of his room door handle and slammed it shut with all my anger. I slumped down the hall heading to the back to get some peace and quiet in my unsettled soul.

    As I stepped through the slide glass door leading to the pool, I heard some laughter, conversation and music and I immediately took a ‘U’ turn but all was lost because I turned too slow and before I could head back Marcus spotted me and called out to get my attention.

    I took a deep breath and spun back around with a fake smile plastered on my face.

“Yeah,” I answered, walking towards him at the pools edge.

   The other guys stopped talking and their eyes watched me as I walked towards him. The guy’s eyes kept on their target, me, and the girl’s were filled with hate that could steam and boil through anything. But the only person that didn’t look as terrible or scary was Abigail or as I called her Abby.

“Yeah,” I said again.

 I stood a few feet from him.

“Can you come closer?” he asked.

“Why?” I replied, still standing at my place with my hands on my waist.

“Come on, Mandy. Stop being so uptight,” he scolded, leaning on the side of the pool, his wet hair pasted down on his head, his hazel eyes shining invitingly. I sighed and stooped down to his level after stepping directly in front of him.

“Let me whisper it,” he said, using his index finger calling me forward.  I came closer and before I could even catch my breath he had pulled me down in the water but not before I released an epic screamed.  Now the tears ran more freely. I jumped out of the water to catch my breath, only to come up to dwell in the mocking laughter of the others.

“Why did you do that!” I yelled, getting out of the water, wet and cold.

    I was crying and shivering although the sun was high up in the sky but I had this terrible illness that doctors all around were still trying to figure out, and this wasn’t helping it. It made it harder for me to take the cold and so, I only take baths in warm water, and I stayed away from anything too cold unless, my body and bones would become very stiff and eventually it gets harder to move. Cameron came running out, his girlfriend not far behind. I didn’t turn around because my shivering got violent and my teeth began to clatter and the stiffness began, slowly but surely.

   “What did you do!” he yelled at his friends, running up behind me. He knew I was sickly like that and it could cost me my life. He knew I only came out to get some sun and maybe dip my foot in a few times and that was my ‘swim’ for the day.

   “What happened, Mandy?”He asked quickly gripping onto my shoulders but when I almost fell he lifted me up in his arms.

“Everyone!” he yelled,” Go home. Now!” he shouted.

   Everyone gave murmurs of disappointment as they exited but we didn’t stay long enough to see if all of them left. I had to get warm and dry or this wouldn’t end well. He stormed in, slamming the glass door in his girlfriends, Anna face, locking everyone out and Anna who stood there dumb stricken.

   Finally, I thought. I was freezing and I couldn’t feel my fingers or my toes. I must have looked dead but I couldn’t help myself from smiling and thinking ‘YES!’

   He walked in his room and slammed the door shut. My eyes became heavy now and I wanted to sleep terribly badly.  This wasn’t good at all, I thought.

“Mandy, don’t close your eyes,” he said urgently.

    He placed me on his bed and began stripping me down. I couldn’t protest because I was literally frozen. He removed my blouse and unzipped my shorts throwing it across the room. He grabbed one of his big shirts and pulled it over my body after drying me with one of his towels. He removed the top sheet of his bed after lifting me up again like a baby.

    He bent in front of me and placed his hands under the shirt and released the strings of the still slightly wet bra pulling it away throwing it across the room with the other wet garments and slid his hand up my leg and found the two corners of my underwear pulling it down my legs. I shivered again out of excitement this time but he didn’t take it anyway….. at all.

    He didn’t notice…. I think. He tucked me under the sheet and after a few minutes he realized that my teeth were still clattering together and I was still shaking. He already had on a shirt but it was slightly wet. He changed it, putting on a dry, clean one and stood looking at me.  I closed my eyes for a minute then felt the sheet being lifted off my body, Cameron getting in and it being placed back down.  His hand came out and grabbed my waist but hesitantly.

“Can I touch you?” he asked. I had no choice I wanted warmth.

   I nodded slightly and his hands wrapped around my waist pulling my body to his. I could feel the rapid beat of his heart. He was warm and that was all I wanted. For now.  I snuggled in his arms pushing out my ass so it came in contact with his front but acted innocently by snuggling my head into his chest. He was so warm. I sighed in comfort and he realized this and released the breath he must have been holding.  I don’t know how long I’ve been lying there but I fell into a deep sleep.

 

Chapter 4

 

I felt the bed slightly dip and opened my eyes to see Cameron heading to the bathroom, which was connected to his bedroom. He ran a hand through his hair which was already bed tangled. I sighed softly, and when his back disappeared into the bathroom I relaxed.

I was warmer than before, and I realized that I could move my body now with ease. I heard the shower running and I guess I was safe for now. Without me even realizing it, my mind wavered. I imaged his naked, built body as water ran down his toned flesh. I bit my lip. I saw his blue eyes daring me to disobey him, his perfect, plush, pink lips pulled up in a smirk, when he realized that I couldn't deny him.

And then I saw her face. Long blonde hair, beautiful brown eyes, pouty lips, and then the tears came to my damn eyes once again. Why can't I just give in and give up? He isn't mine, I'm not allowed to have feelings like this for someone as close to me as my step brother. I need to leave before he came back out, I thought.

I removed the sheet that smelt so much like it him, that it pained my heart. I shakily placed my feet on the ground. Easing off the bed gently, I stood up slowly. My legs were so weak but nothing was going to stop me from exiting his room as fast as possible. As I released the bed and placed all my weight down on my legs they gave way. A small cry escaped my lips, and as I fell to the ground I prayed to God that he didn't hear.

The shower remained running and with the only option I could think of I began crawling. The bed wasn't far away from the door but it felt like forever and my breathing became ragged. When I realized that I couldn't go any further, my mouth became parched and I began to see black spots, I sat on the ground, my hand palmed down on his carpeted floor, my brown tendrils falling into my face as I tried to regulate my breathing.

"Mandy," a voiced called out, concern dripping from every letter I heard.

I choked back a sob. Please, don't touch me, I thought.

I felt strong arms lifting me up. I gasped because a pain began to seep through my chest. Like my heart was constricting squeezing together.

"Please," I choked out on a hiss," Just put me down."

"Are you crazy!?" he asked," Do you want to die?"

Of a broken heart, I thought.

"Just let me be," I tried to yell.

"I can't do that," he said, putting me back in his bed.

I felt a slight breeze as he placed me down and the shirt I had on rode up. I looked down and I could see my tan legs coming all the way up to my thighs and just a bit further would show my....

He looked at where I was looking and I saw his eyes widen. His breathing increased just a bit and he bit his bottom lip a bit too hard which made it pale. He cleared his throat and looked away grabbing the sheet and throwing it over me. I'm that hideous, I thought.

When will you see me like how I see you? I asked him silently with my eyes, as tears clouded my vision again.

"Don't cry," he pleaded, wiping away my tears," Please, don't cry, baby."

Did he just call me baby? My tears fell harder. I didn't know why, but that one word jolted something inside of me. Something that felt like a taste of elixir; some rare and sweet drug.

I looked at him now. I had just realized that the only thing that was keeping me from seeing his perfection was a towel wrapped around his waist.

I heard the door slam shut from outside Cameron's room and loud footsteps stomped it was up. Mom burst open the door, her brownish blondish hair out from its sophisticated bun and all over the place, her eyes wide with fright and her breathing labored. Behind her my step dad stood, hunched over on his knees breathing hard as my personal doctor, Dr. Mushin, a short, petite Indian woman, who cared for me since, my mom, was courting my step- dad.

 

Impressum

Tag der Veröffentlichung: 24.07.2013

Alle Rechte vorbehalten