Why?

I stand in the rain. I can’t feel anything but hopelessness. I feel alone. She left me here. Why would she just leave me like that? I stand at her grave. It reads Alexandria a young soul who has left our world at an age so young. She took her own life because she found that it was simply not worth living. My flash backs start to invade my dark, fucked up mind. The way I found her laying there. The cut was so deep. Her body was so pale. I walked in and saw the blade was in her right hand.

I screamed her name aloud. I ran over to her. Feeling helplessness as I got down on my knees next to her. I shook her. Blood the blood was everywhere. It was a sickening scene for me all I could see was blood. Tears running down my cheek. I kept shaking her and yelling her name aloud trying to wake her up. She didn’t move. I needed her to wake up and come back to me. I yelled more and more as I knew she wasn't coming back to me. Don’t leave me like this! I need you don't leave!

Please come back Alexandria! Don’t leave me!!! The more and more I realized she wasn’t coming back the heavier my tears ran. I curled up beside her wrapped my arm around her lifeless body. I repeated the words why over and over. Why would you do this to me? I need you here! I remembered laying there for hours curled up next to her asking why. No one was going to answer. As day turned to night I felt sick more and more. After crying myself to sleep right next to her, my friends and her friends entered the room. They gathered around us.

I didn’t care who was there. All I could think about was her. I remembered how my friends tried to take her away from me I could remember screaming. More crying and more screaming. I didn’t want them to take her away from me. No! I shouted fiercely as they tore her away from me! NO! YOU CAN’T DO THIS! DON’T TOUCH HER! Please don’t take her. I fell to my knees as they carried her out of the room. I felt more of my heart start to break into tiny pieces as she was taken further away from me. I covered my face with my hands.

My best friend Derek came to me. Come on Max. I couldn’t move from my spot. I didn’t want to move from my spot. He hugged me. I cried into his shoulder. The last thing I remember was him saying something to me about how he doesn’t want me alone for awhile. He knows how it feels. The boy he loved took his own life. But after thinking about that I couldn’t remember anything. Everything else was a damn blur! I snapped back to the present. Every day I come here and I bring her a black rose. I leave a note that says I promise to never love anybody else but you. I can’t forget you. We will be together soon. Tears were running down my already cold face.

I fell to my knees as I took a blade out of my pocket. A single cut would do it. This cut would take me to her. My tears were coming heavier now. I did it. I press the blade into my wrist and cut. I shout the words HOW COULD YOU JUST TAKE YOUR OWN LIFE! YOU LEFT ME!!!! I could feel my body get limp. I lay back against her grave. I imagine I’m lying next to her. I could feel warmth as my blood ran heavily out of my arm. I whispered don’t you ever do this to me again Alex. Don’t you dare. That was it. I could be with her now. My lifeless body lays there next to her grave. No better place then to be near her. Forever.

Impressum

Tag der Veröffentlichung: 26.03.2012

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