sadness days

i can't remember when my sadness begun maybe ten or eleven or even before i born.

 

I'm 15 years old now. I think that I look like my mom with my blue eyes and black hair.

 

 

My dad left us in mysterious way. he just left us a letter telling us how he is so sorry and love us, but we didn't heard from him since then and he never even try to explain why he left us just saying sorry. But thanks God for having my brother, John, who works very hard in a small factory to help my mom.

 

My sister Elsa passed out for 10 years now, i do not why but all i know is what the doctor told us that she will not going to wake up as her body and mind refuse the treatment.

On Monday evening, my brother John made a car accedint, he crushed a tree in his way to home and he died before arriving to the hospital.

 

 

The most strange thing is that i did not cry when i hear that bad news about my brother death even my mom

 

but all she did is shout with terrified saying " He hears the song ,He hears the song"

 

I never asked my mom what she meant by this  because i had never received answers from anyone so it was nonsense to receive any now!

 

 

Just after twenty four hours from my brother's death my mom decided to move to a new house . it was so close to the hospital that my sister get treatment in.

  

And i was wonder if we move , was that mean that We "i, mom and who knows maybe my sister too" have the chance to solve all our problems or even forget it and just left them all behind us.

The Fail O My New Start

 In the first glance to the house i felt so scared, but actually i felt warm here. i knew every details in home like where  was the rooms, kitchen and the farm and i imagined a little dog too.

My first night in my bed room i heared a song i could not hear well the words,but it freaked me out. I knew too who is the singer but i could not say for sure who was this. From her voice I guessed that she was a girl approximately in her 15s too.

 

I run to my mom to ask her if she heared the song but she just said to me one word "you! " and she fainted as my sister did.

 

 

I did not know what i have to do so i called an ambulance , it came and took my mom to the same hospital of my sister.

 

A very old doctor with a cold face told me that i had to go back and never went out home and he will call me if she woke up. I told him" i will not leave her till she wake" he replied nervously there was nothing i can do for her and i could not help her from here .

So i returned to home alone and with many questions on my head such as who was the singer and what my mom meant by refering to me before she fainted.

 

 

The Hidden Truth Comes to The Live

i woke up screaming at 9 Pm  i had a very bad nightmare it was about a very tall man killing a little girl by his hand in the same room of mine .

My body could not move for 1 hour, I was freezing in my bed because i was so afraid and feeling lonely.

My fear made me woke all the night long and i waited till the sun then i started to wipe out the house to find anything that could give me any answer, but it was like to search about neddle in a hall farm .

 

At the 9 P.M in the next day i waited in the hall waitting to hear the song and see if i was just had a hallucination or not but as i expected i heard the same song so i ran toward the voice seeking for answer, but the voice was from my own room .

 

I opened the door but the voice stopped immediately the light went off from all the house so i used my phone to light the room and after 1 minute i got a message from my mom's phone wrote in it "search in your bear".

 

There was no need to exert any effort from me as there was a big red bear lying on the bed but it was not here from the beginning .

Rushing to the kitchen try to find a knife or anything sharp to cut the bear and found what was hide inside it.

 

After cutting every peace of it, i found a small red box. then i broke it and i was shocked as i found pictures belonged  to my family when i was just 1 years old girl . it must be my home but why we left the house and the important things

whathappened here and what was this song.

  

 

 In the next day i went to the hospital to reassure that my mom was oki and my sister too . I  asked the receptionist, but he did not even look at me even when i shouted at him till his cup of tea broke he just ignored me .

 

 

The Real Father

Then i found the old doctor who was being treated my sister and my mom.

I  did not love him so much but he was the only one who answered me.

 

 I asked him "how my mom is going now" he replied with sad voice "i told you that you should stay at home, never try to talk to any one and go home now, i will talk to you at phone".

 

I told him that i could not set at home with tied hands not even try to know what happened because I believed that there was something wrong and I should find out what was it. He told me that before trying to figure what happened in the past, try first to know what happened for your father or whatwyour father had done.

 

Aftermath of his mysterious words, the nurse came and told him that they need him for an emergency surgery.  So he left me immediately . On my way back to home i was so determined to go in the next day and asked him where was my father and what he had done .

 

When i arrived to my home i went to my room and looked at the pictures of my family which i found here .

 

 I looked at my father , mother my brother and a 1 years old girl it was me i was sure  about it .

 

At night i heard the same song and then the light went off as the sound was coming from my room again.

 

 holding my phone to light the room, i received a message from my mom's phone wrote in it "in your grey gitar there is a key hides under the Guitar strings find it and go behind the big mirror in the basement ".

 

And after the light went on i found the gitar beside my bed although it was not here before like the red bear.

 

 cutting the strings , took the key and go to the basement ,i did not found any thing there accept a big

 

mirror but there were a huge amount of dust that i could not saw my reflection . i hold the mirror away to see

 

what was behind it , i found a secret door for a big room painted in white with a picture for a daughter, her father and mother also i found many hand writing in the whole wall but the writing did not make any sene

 

 i could not see well just a fragment like "alone , killer , forgive ".

 

I stayed all the night looking at all this stuff: the pictures and the hand writing at the wall hope to discover any

 

answer and after many hours i fall asleep and had a nightmare about this family in that picture that this man

 

was a crazy one locked on that room and his little daughter served him but she was so sad. Then the old

 

doctor from the hospital talked to her but i could not recognized what he said.

 

I woke up when i heard the song and waited the sun to rise to go to the old doctor at hospital it seemed that he

 

was the key of my mysterious but i did not found him there and no body answered me as usual. But before i

 

leave the hospital i went to saw my mom and remembered the message which came to me every night after

 

the song from her phone but i did not find her phone , so i went back home hopeless.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

InfinitE

 When i arrived home i heard a voice of a man so i sneaked to the kitchen and got a knife to protect myself .

 

       I followed the voice , it was from the backyard where i found the old doctor digging under a very old tree . 

 

I shouted on him saying "what are you doing here"

he said "i must burn you , you hurt this family too"

I shouted at him with a very violent tone "you will never kill me ,and what family you talking about , do you

 

mean mine ".

 

He told me if I wanted  answers I should wait to see for myself. After he finshed the digging of a great hole he told me to look at this

 

girl that buried in this hole very close . she was the girl in my nightmares .

 

I told him " i do not know this girl and i do not want to know all I need is  just you get out of my house " then he started to cry

 

He told me all the truth which i did not want to believe in. He told me that "you are this girl honey i

 

burried you many years ago , your father was a crazy man and i was his doctor and his best friend at school

 

but after he went crazy i recommended to your mother that she had to sent him to hospital but she begged

 

me not to sent him , she loved him so much as she always  lived with a hope that their love will treat him.

 

 She passed this love to you, after he killed her you begged me too not to do anything hurt him by telling the

 

police or even sent him to the hospital ,you told me that he was your last member of your family and without

 

him you will kill yourself ,so i looked him in a secret room to protect you and i visited you every single night

 

after i finished my work at the hospital . then after 2 years from your mother death when you were 15 years old, he killed you beside your red bear and you were holding your gitar, you were a very good singer. i am sorry

 

honey i have to burn your body to set you free".

 

Then i remembered every thing: my past life and how my mother was suffering too much and me after her by

 

caring after my father but what was more diffuclt to me was to remember how my new family was suffring by

 

having me by their side . I knew that why there was nobody talking to me, it was just because i am not exist .

 

and why i could not to see myself in the mirror, not because the dust but that because i am just a ghost .

 

After that i conclude that i am just a sad soul cursed everyone hearing my song and do not help me , first i

 

sang to John "that i thought to be my brother" so he slept in his car while he was driving so he died , my sister and my mother

 

too.

 

So i walked towards him hold his hand with a smile telling him that i remembered everything then i snap him

 

with the knife and buried him with my body and there were another bones ,i think that it is belonging to my

 

real mother and father  or other people else, who cares!.

 

I turned to my home as nothing happened lying on my bed singing the song waited any family to hear me to be

 

mine and no one and i mean no one will seperate me from

 

my family but death.

 

 

ENJOY HEARING MY SONG

 

apart with apart death men

 

make you suffer and wish disappear

 

coming with signs like lions scratch

 

cut you pieces but without a touch

 

wondering if you ever can see him and wash your pain

 

 

or will just be a memory to stop your breath and faith

 

the life is bad when you sad

 

but worst when you lose the hand

 

No love ,no care no even family

 

jus a misery no one can ever bear

 

 

 

 

Impressum

Tag der Veröffentlichung: 31.07.2016

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