Before you Read

Copyright © 2016 MBDP98

 

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form or in any means—by electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise—without prior written permission.

 

This story is PURE fictional and 100% my idea. 

 

 

 

 

Prologue

Ever since I was a little girl, I kept on dreaming about how my future was going to be. What College I planned to assist, what job I was going to get, how my kids were going to be named, and what features did I look at in my husband. Everything. Then I grew up and things changed in a drastic way.

 

I had mixed up emotions, responsibilities, and decisions that I never thought I would ever have to make. I had to stop my plans to focus on a mistake that changed my life forever. That mistake that crashed with everything I've worked hard for my entire life. 

 

Then he came crashing into my life. . .

 

We met, he seduced me, we hooked up, and we both got what we both wanted. He wanted some fun and to be carefree for at least a night. Me? Well. . .I was sick of being teased because I was the inexperienced virgin, goody-goody two-shoes. I wanted to taste what true freedom was like. But, what happened after that supposedly one-night stand was more than I imagined. My little adventure turned to be a life lesson I never thought I would go through at a young age. All those times I felt pity towards those misfortune young girls, now I was being part of them. 

 

I was a normal 17-year-old girl. With the feeling of discovering myself, to have a normal life like any other teenager. But one mistake leads to another, and life turns serious all of a sudden. With responsibilities, choices, lessons, and constant drama with a famous pop star, with who the chances of encountering should’ve been none.

 

I just can't believe yet that I'm carrying his baby. . .

Chapter 01 - Bumping with Mr. Super Star

“He was totally checking me out!” my best friend, Dani, starts squealing as we enter this bar whose name I never heard. She keeps blabbering about this guy who obviously wasn't interested in her, but who am I to explode her little bubble of happiness? So I just smile and nod once in a while.

 

“Why are we at a bar? You know I don't drink” I said as we sit on a stool.

 

“That's the point of bringing you here, Gwen. Is for you to finally stop being a prude with no life” she smiles innocently.

 

“First, ouch. Second, I'm not a prude” I say defensively.

 

She rolls her eyes. “Right,” she says sarcastically. “Give us two shots of vodka, please”

 

The bartender nods and grins at my friend, but she is too busy reapplying her makeup to notice. When he places the two mini glasses in front of us, Dani just picks hers up and drinks the liquid as if she has done this a thousand times—which I wouldn't be surprised, knowing her.

 

I stared down at mine for quite a long time, grimacing in disgust. I’ve never liked drinking alcohol. I’ve tried it a few times, but I always ended up taking just a sip and then giving the rest to my older brother. Dani lets go a sigh and turn to me.

 

“You're the one that wanted to go out and learn how not to be so uptight. Let go, would you? It's Saturday and we're in a bar, perhaps we can get you laid” she chuckles.

 

“Do you see anyone here without the face of a serial killer?” I ask and motion for her to get a look at the place.

 

“Good point” she replies giggling. “Now, go ahead and drink this” she commands and places my shot glass in front of me.

 

I sigh and grab it, smelling it first. Dani laughed at my disgusted reaction. I send her a death glare and then drank it. The strong liquid burns my throat, making me squint my eyes, and shake my head repeatedly. 

 

“God, how can people drink this!?” I ask and cough a little. Dani shook her head in amusement and starts swallowing the second drink that the bartender placed on the table.

 

After what seems like her fourth drink of the night she excuses herself and goes to the bathroom. I tap my fingers against the wooden table and stare at my surroundings. My gaze falls on one of the tables at the far end, where two girls—that seemed in their twenties—point and laugh at me. I look down at my clothing and roll my eyes. I am wearing a simple white dress, what's so wrong with that? I try to ignore them, but I must admit. . . It was getting on my nerves.

I look beside me and see there is a tray full of shot glasses, each one filled to the top. I shrug it off and grab one. It is still strong but I am already getting used to the taste, so it kind of burns a little less. I started drinking like my third drink of the night and the room somehow starts to spin slightly and I begin to feel lightheaded. Is that normal?

 

“Excuse me, may I sit?” I hear a voice beside me. I look up at this person and was soon met by two chocolate brown eyes.

 

I nod slowly. “Go ahead.”

 

“Thanks” he replies with a grin.

 

“Have I seen you somewhere?” I ask and knit my eyebrows together, trying to remember. He chuckles and shakes his head repeatedly. He takes a sip of the drink in his hand and then turns back to me.

 

“Did you really ask me that?” he replies.

 

“I guess I did. . . I’m sorry for offending you, but my memory doesn’t apply to strangers I just meet. You remind me of that singing guy?" I say now remembering how my friend is crazy over this guy. I believe his name is Finn. Known mostly because of having millions of followers because of his YouTube videos and having the most 'gorgeous' and ‘intense’ eyes.

 

He nods and takes another sip, not breaking eye contact with me. I smile instinctively and take another shot that the bartender placed in front of me. It must be the one that Dani ordered before leaving me to go to the bathroom.

 

“Cool. I'm talking to a celebrity. Yay me” I say sarcastically.

 

A deep chuckle escapes his lips, which makes me bring my attention back to him. “I've never seen you around here. Do you come often?” he asks and I feel how he starts getting nearer every passing second. I move my legs that were almost touching his. But he has longer legs than me, so anyway they end up touching.

 

“Not really. But I guess I wanted to loosen up a little, so my friend Dani brought me here to have a drink” I don't even know why the hell am I talking to him. It could be all the alcohol that I have in my system that doesn't help me think straight. I just know that drinking is awful, but at the same time makes me feel so different as if I could do anything.

 

“I can help with that” he winks. I stare at the table and fidget with my fingers, feeling the red rushing to my cheeks.

 

“Is my charm working already? I can see you blushing” he smirks and takes a strand of my hair, placing it behind my ear. His long slender fingers brushed my cheek delicately. “I never met such a beautiful girl like you. . .”

 

I scoff at his comment. “You have like a million fans, I suppose you meet thousands every day, and you tell me I'm the most beautiful girl you've ever met? Come on, be more realistic” I giggle and roll my eyes playfully, taking his hand out of my face. He can't be serious if he thinks I'm the most beautiful girl. Even with all this alcohol, I'm not that stupid. . .

 

“I'm serious,” he says and moves an inch closer. “What's your name, pretty face?”

 

“Gwen. . .Just Gwen,” I said timidly.

 

“Well, Gwen, I'm Finn. . . Just Finn,” he says and grabs my hand, bringing it to his lips. He kisses the top of it as my cheeks turn even redder—if that was even possible. We lock gazes, and the sight of him made me feel. . . Breathless? I've never noticed how handsome he is. Yeah, I've seen his music videos, but I never truly noticed him. I was always focused on the music, never on his soft but well-structured features.

 

“You know. . . My friends and I are going to hang out in our hotel for a while, if you want you can totally come with us.”

 

“Is that my friend and I—”

 

“Hey, what did I miss?” Dani asks as she walks toward where I am sitting. She stops abruptly, completely frozen at the sight of Finn. “Oh, my God. . . You're Finn Harries!” she squeals, jumping up and down, just like a crazy fan would. She tries not to raise her voice any further, to avoid the attention of course—her attempts were obviously failing.

 

“And I guess you're Gwen's friend, Dani. . . Nice to meet you,” he says, smiling at my overly excited friend.

 

“Oh my God, oh my God, oh my God!” she says frantically. Finn laughs and shakes his head in amusement.

 

“I was just telling Gwen my friends and I were going to hang out in our hotel for a little while if you want. . .You can join us too”

 

“We would love to!” she said, clapping her hands cheerily. We followed Finn to one of the tables, and we were greeted by a group of grinning boys. I bit my lower lip as I sensed something off in the way they kept eyeing us up and down; it made me feel so uncomfortable.

 

“Well, hello there. . .” said this guy with dark hair and sparkling blue eyes. His face was familiar as well. I’ve seen him before. He was Cameron Philips. He became popular because of his singing YouTube videos, just like Finn. He shamelessly stared at both of us from up and down, so did the others. I stayed closer to Dani, almost hiding behind her, but of course, she didn’t notice my uneasiness as she was too busy drooling over Cameron.

 

When we finished with our introductions, we followed the guys to their car. Finn grinned and opened the car door for me, making me go first. I muttered a 'thanks' and sat in the window seat. Finn sat close to me. 

 

“So, I was thinking that perhaps since they will most likely go to the lobby and drink some more, maybe I can show you something in my room,” he said and slowly caressed my bare knee.

 

“Are you trying to seduce me, Harries?” I asked with my best attempt at being flirty, obviously failing. Don't judge me, I've never done such a thing. Why do you think Dani made me go out in the first place? Because I was the only one in High School with no clue on any of these things. Of drinking, hitting on boys. The only one that doesn't understand the term: Going to a friend's house to do “Homework”. Plus, I believe that with such amount of alcohol in my system, I am not thinking straight, and for some reason, I can't stop thinking about how everything is funny. . .

 

“Maybe I am, is it working so far?” he whispered seductively in my ear. I nodded slowly and then turned my head to the side, his face just mere inches from mine. I quickly looked at the others but they were too busy talking to Dani and drooling over her tight black dress to notice.

 

• • •

 

When we arrived to their hotel, we got out of the car and into the lobby. Finn instantly grabbed my hand and pulled me to the elevator. I followed along but looked over my shoulder to see my best friend. Cameron pulled her to sit with him on one of the couches. Since she was under his spell, of course, she obliged.

 

“So, where we're going?” I giggled.

 

“I want to show you my hotel room. . .If you don't have a problem, of course,” he said and hit the button that leads to his floor.

 

“And what are we going to do there, huh? Stare at the ceiling?” I asked.

 

“We can do whatever you want, babe. . .But I won't deny that I did had some things planned for both of us,” he said and placed his arm beside my head, trapping me. I smiled shyly and heard the sound of the elevator doors opening, letting us know that we got there. He dropped his view from my eyes to my lips, then down to my neck, and even though I most likely won't have any clue of these types of things, by what Dani has told me, I pretty much can know what he's thinking. And let me tell you something, I listen to his songs once in a while, I’m not a huge fan, but I never had this urge to kiss someone so badly in my entire life. His lips just looked so full and moist that I would love to know how they taste. He pulled away and then grabbed my hand leading me towards his room.

 

He turned on the light switch and then turned back to me. “You are so beautiful,” he said. I rolled my eyes and sat at the edge of the bed. He chuckled and then sat beside me.

 

“You still don't believe me, huh? I met a lot of girls, believe me, I did. I know beauty when I see it” he said and placed a soft kiss on my neck which made me turn my face towards him. “You're so hot and you don't even know it”

 

He was so close to my face; his eyes were darker than before. His breath had a hint of alcohol, but it seemed like he tried to disguise it by eating a mint. I couldn't hold it any longer, and so I grabbed him by the hem of his shirt and kissed him with all I had. He didn't complain and kissed me with the same strength and need. I tried to shake away the voice of my mother telling me to stop, to pull away and leave. But I'm done being the goody-goody no one takes seriously. . .At least for tonight.

 

He slightly pushed me back into the bed, not breaking the kiss. I felt how his hands trailed further down into my waist and then to my legs. He slowly unzipped my dress and pulled away, both panting heavily. He stared at my body and then gave me a peck on the lips.

 

“So, you want to loosen up a little? Let me show you how babe” he said and took off my dress. He grinned and then took his shirt off. My eyes dropped to how defined his body was and suddenly felt how the room was on fire. He started kissing me on the lips again.

Chapter 02 - Feeling Sick

|One Month Later|

 

“Get out of bed, Gwen. . .We will be late for school, c'mon!” Dani shook me, but I groaned in response. I ­­was feeling sick, with a very painful headache, and I'm pretty sure I will punch her any time sooner. Usually, I feel in a great mood, but today, I feel like I have been hit by a truck. The same way I felt after my huge hangover a month ago—

 

Right. . .Finn. Ugh.

 

I can't believe I actually hooked up with that jerk. Is clearly he had done it with so many, which I'm not surprised honestly. He is the Finn Harries. The most famous pop star at the moment with the most intense eyes ever and blah, blah, blah. After that night we had, I thought at least he was going to call me, how stupid I was. It has been one month since that encounter, and I still dream of him. And I just wake up sweating, still feeling his long slender fingertips on my legs. And he's eyeing me, taunting me with every kiss on my neck. I just want to wake up and scream at myself for being so stupid.

 

“I feel sick,” I said and rolled the other way around. I wasn’t lying, I truly felt that way.

 

“Don't use that lie against me again, I won't fall this time” she said and I can see how she's putting her arms on her hips, even though I'm giving her my back. I rolled my eyes even though she couldn’t see me. I groaned and then stood up, feeling sort of dizzy. I rubbed my head and then my eyes.

 

“I seriously feel sick,” I said and got out of bed. I rubbed my stomach and then went to the bathroom to wash my teeth.

 

When I dressed in my usual clothes, I walked downstairs with Dani. I saw a note on the fridge. I let go of a sigh and read it.

 

‘Had to work. See you tonight. We love you and your brother’

 

Love, mom, and dad.

 

I threw the note in the trash can and then turned back to my friend, who was having an apologetic look on her face.

 

“I'm okay, you know. . .Don't give me that face,” I said, crossing my arms across my chest. I hated it when she gave me that pity face.

 

“They love you, you know that,” she said and smiled at me.

 

I nodded. “I know they do. . .I just miss them. I know I see them at night, but is not enough”

 

“Hey little booger and, well. . .Little booger's friend” I heard my older brother, Alec.

 

“Hey, butthole” I grinned. He hugged me and messed with my hair like when we were little kids. He knows I hate that that, but he does it anyway. Then his gaze fell down to Dani, who had her arms crossed, and held an unimpressed look.

 

“I have hugs for you too” he smirked. She took a step back and raised her hand, stopping him from coming any closer to her.

 

“I think I'll pass” a hint of a smile on her lips. I don’t understand why can’t she admit that she does have feelings for my brother? She wants to be mad at him, but deep down, is an impossible task.

 

“Okay,” he said and raised his hands in defeat. “If you change your mind, you know where to find me” he winked. “You have a nice day,” Alec said and kissed my head. He aimed to kiss Dani but she backed away once again.

 

“You're playing hard to get. . .I like it,” he said and then grabbed his car keys, he exited the room with one last wave. I turned to Dani and grinned at her.

 

“He so likes you,” I said and she shook her head quickly.

 

“I wouldn't date your brother,” she said and crossed her arms across her chest.

 

“Why not?” I asked. Dani grabbed an apple from the table and stared at it for a bit before giving it a bite.

 

“Because. . .He's your brother, and the brother of your best friend is always off-limits” she said. I rolled my eyes and shook my head. I grabbed my bag from the floor and slung it on my shoulder.

 

“Maybe. . .But it would be so cool to have you as a sister in law, don't you think?” I said. She nodded and gave me a big hug. We walked outside and into her car, then we drove to school.

 

• • •

 

The day went by quickly and without knowing, it was already lunch. I didn't felt like eating, so I just stayed near my lockers and rubbed at my stomach. It was hurting so much.

 

“Hey Gwen, how're you doing?” one of my classmates, Bill, said while nudging at my shoulder playfully. We're not that close, but he's a good guy, we like to talk from time to time. He was eating a plate full of fries. There comes the feeling again.

 

“We missed you at our table, what's wrong?” he asked. I stared at his fries. God, please stop hurting.

He noticed where my gaze is and then put the fries literally in front of my face. The greasy smell entering my nostrils.

 

“Want one?” he asked.

 

I shook my head quickly. "Oh God," I said and ran into the nearest bathroom. I think I just vomited my dinner from last night.

 

“Hey, are you okay? A guy outside is worried about you” I heard a girl knocking at the door. I flushed the toilet and then went outside, rubbing my stomach. I felt slightly better but still dizzy.

 

“Yeah, I'm okay, it might've been something I ate,” I said and washed my lips in the sink. "You have any mint?" I asked. She smiled and dug in her pocket to retrieve a pack of mints. She opened it and then gave it to me.

 

“At least you look fine, you feel any better?” she asked.

 

“Sort of. . .Still kind of startled, you know. . .”

 

She nodded understandingly. “Well. . .Look at the bright side, perhaps it was just food poisoning and not something worse like, you're pregnant or anything” she laughed. The girl left me there, completely speechless. Pregnant? Me? That's impossible.

 

How can I be pregnant if I—

 

Wait, when was I supposed to get my period? It has been one month since my first time with Finn. Did he use protection? I didn't see him do it.

 

Oh. My. God

Chapter 03 - That Jerk

“Are you sure you might be pregnant?” Dani asked. I sat at the edge of my bed and let go of a heavy sigh. I stared at the ceiling and then back at her. She crossed her arms across her chest and looked at me expectantly. I nodded slowly and then covered my face with both of my hands, on the verge of tears.

“Hey, Gwen, listen to me. . .Don't jump into conclusions yet until we're 100% sure. Just, take the Pregnancy Test. I'll go with you to get it”

“This is bad. . .What if I am pregnant? Then, what do I do?” I asked and a tear rolled down my cheek. I wiped it away quickly, trying my best not to break down at this moment. That would be the last thing I need.

"Then I'll be with you, because that's what besties do. . ." she said and grabbed my hand, then sat beside me on the bed. “Did Finn, you know. . .Used protection?” she asked whispering the last part.

“I don't know. . .” I said. I felt so stupid, so lost, I tried to remember every single detail of that night—even though I didn’t want to, of course—Dani shushed me and then made me place my head on her legs, she started caressing my hair, soothing me.

“That's what frustrates me the most. . .I didn't know what I was thinking when I hooked up with him” more tears rolled down my cheeks. “I am such an idiot!”

"Stop it, Gwen, you're not an idiot. . .This is not your fault. Now, I'll go get a test. Stay here, everything will be fine" she said. I sat up straight and laid with my fluffy pillows, hugging them tightly.

“And what if not? What if nothing is fine?” I asked, my lip trembling.

“Then how I said. . .I'll be there for you.”

 

“Here you go,” Dani said as she handed me a box with the pregnancy test inside. I took a long breath and with my shaky hand, grabbed it.

“Gwen, it's okay. . .Take a deep breath and remember that I'm here,” she said. I did as she told me and closed my eyes for a second. I nodded and then entered the bathroom. I did what the box told me and then washed my hands. It was so weird to take that test, so uncomfortable. I got out of the bathroom and shook it a little.

“Now what?” I asked.

“We have to wait for a minute” Dani read the instructions and sat on my bed while I paced back and forth impatiently. I never thought a minute could be so eternal. I swear I've never been so nervous in my entire life. My heart is racing so much and my hands are sweaty.

“It's time” Dani informed me after what seemed like forever. 

I grabbed the stick tightly, but couldn't flip it over to see the results, I was frozen on my spot. Dani noticed this and hugged me. “You can do it” she whispered in my ear. I nodded slowly and finally, flipped it over. 

“Oh, my God,” I said covering my mouth with my free hand. One tear rolled down my cheek and I fell to the ground. I couldn’t believe it; this can't be happening. “It's positive” I informed and dropped the stick beside me. I couldn't move, I couldn't stand. . .Nothing. Dani kneeled in front of me and hugged me. I rested my head on her chest and cried even more. She rubbed my arm up and down, trying to shush me. I shook my head repeatedly, still not believing the results.

“This is my fault,” I said.

“No, is not. . .Is his fault. He should've used protection” 

“But I was the one that had to make sure he was using it. I was just so drunk and-and. . .I wanted to let go for a night. This is all my fault, and I don't know what to do, I just—” I couldn't finish that sentence, I was breathing heavily.

 “Shh. Stop beating up yourself, Gwen, I'm here. . .You’re not alone”

 “How are you feeling?” Dani asked while handing me a cup of hot chocolate. I shrugged, wiped the dry tear on my face, and then took a sip from the warm liquid. I stared at my walls, full of posters of my favorite bands and movies. One corner full of pictures of my family, so happy. I wanted to cry all over again cause of what I've done, and how dead I'm going to be once they find out. What is my brother going to think?

 “I can't believe there's a baby growing inside of me,” I said forcing a smile. I have to put myself together. I can’t just break and show weakness after this. I need to be strong—or to pretend, at least.

“I can't believe is from Finn, I mean. . .He's such a jerk. While you're here, crying, he might be out there partying or going on tours. That bastard” Dani huffed and crossed her arms over her chest. I chuckled at her comment and then met her gaze. She had a reassuring smile on her face, a smile that always makes me feel better, no matter what. 

“Thanks,” I said and put the cup on my nightstand. 

“For what?” she asked.

“For being here. . .With me” I replied. 

She hugged me tightly. “I will always be there for you, G. You're my best friend, remember?” 

“I know” I replied honestly.

Chapter 04 - Defensive Big Brother

“Are you going to tell him?” Dani asked.

 

“Tell who?” I played the fool, I knew perfectly who she was referring to.

 

“Gwen, who do you think? The father of the baby” she said and sat with me on the bed.

 

“I don't even know where he is, or how to reach him. . .Is obvious he doesn't care about me, he only wanted to hook up, and so there I was. . .I don't even want him near this baby. I want him out of my life”

 

“He needs to know, G. He has the right”

 

“Please, don't. . .I just want to stop talking about him. . .” I said and covered my face with both of my hands. Dani let go a sigh and rubbed at my back soothingly.

 

“Hey. . .Let's go clear our heads. Go to Starbucks, or to the mall, perhaps catch a movie? It will be good for you; you know?”

 

“I'm not really in the mood for that,” I said and tilt my head sideways to get a better look at her.

 

“C'mon G. Just you and me, you can't spend the afternoon like this”

 

“I just figured out I'm having a baby, Dan,” I said, goosebumps running through my body with only saying that word.

 

“I'm sorry. . .I'm just trying to help”

 

“I know” I sighed. “Fine, fine, you win. . .” I said and stood up. She smiled and got out of bed as well. She grabbed my hand and dragged me to her car.

 

“We will go to Starbucks and then we can hang out in the mall. . .If that's good to you” Dani offered. I nodded as an answer and then turned the radio all the way up, the sound of Selena's new song filled the background. I stared outside my window. It was a sunny day here in L.A., the cars passing by, people walking, and the birds flying. Everyone with somewhere to go, with their own lives. We all have a story, something going on that the person walking by you doesn't know.

 

Perhaps that man with a suit got a promotion, or that woman is going home to greet her husband and kids, that group of teenagers going to shop. Me? I'm having a baby. . .That's what's going on with my life.

 

Finn’s P.O.V

 

“I'm starving, bro” one of my best friends, Jacob, commented while putting on his black vans. “Let's go find something to eat”

 

“There's a Starbucks just around the block. We can go eat there and then we can go to that meeting we have later today” said Jacob while putting on deodorant.

 

“Another meeting? God, this sucks” I groaned and buried my face in the pillow.

 

Jacob chuckled. "How's Clara?" he asked. I looked up and saw him grinning.

 

I shrugged. "We're good, I'll text her to see if she wants to come to eat with us"

 

“Cool,” Cameron said and put on one of the shirts that are being sold like merchandise. I send him a smirk and he laughed.

 

"I'm promoting my merchandise, Harries. You should do the same" he said and threw me a pillow.

 

"Whatever," I said and started texting Clara.

 

Gwen's P.O.V

 

We got out of the car and walked inside Starbucks. The smell of cinnamon and coffee soon hit my nostrils, and I couldn't help but sigh at just that simple smell. I felt slightly better, but that doesn't mean I forgot any of the new things I discovered. I will become a mom. Just thinking about it, my heart keeps beating at a rapid pace. Goosebumps running down my spine.  But just like Dani said, I need to clear my head. And what better than to stuff my face with a warm muffin and drink a sweet Frappuccino?

 

While we were ordering, I looked at my surroundings. The sound of people talking filled the room. When my Frappuccino was ready, I informed Dani that I would go look for a table for us to sit while she waits for her order to be ready. She nodded and I turned around to find a place that wasn’t already taken. I clumsily bumped with someone when I turned around, and it made my drink fall to the ground. I let go a heavy sigh and then kneeled down to pick up my now empty cup.

 

“I'm very sorry” I heard a deep voice. I didn't move, I was frozen on my spot. I tightly grabbed the cup in my hands, remembering the last time I heard that voice.

 

“Finn,” I said and stood up. Face to face with the boy I hooked up with last month, the father of the baby that is now growing inside of me.

 

“Gwen? God, long time no see” he smiled. I threw the cup away and then crossed my arms across my chest.

 

“Yeah, well, whatever” I shrugged.

 

“How you've been?” he asked and scratched the back of his head.

 

"Like you even care?" I said a little too harshly. But what would you expect? He got what he wanted, he never called even though I left him a note with my phone number, he got me pregnant. I have the right to be angry at him.

 

“I do care. . .After our night together” he winked and took a step towards me, which made me step back.

 

“Hey, Finn,” a blonde girl said from behind him. He turned around and smiled widely, then gave her a peck on the lips. I tried to put on my best fake smile.

 

“Why don't you go to our table with the other guys. I'll be right there” Finn said. The blonde chick nodded, but not before sending me a dirty look. When she left, he turned back to me, grinning.

 

“New conquest?” I asked.

 

He chuckled at my response and shook his head. “Jealous?” 

 

“Why would I be?” I asked narrowing my eyes at him. Is he even serious? Who the hell does he think he is?

 

“Because you missed how good I made you feel. . .Do you remember?”

 

“I don't want to. . .” I said, shaking my head repeatedly, taking once again another step back. A devilish smirk plastered across his face as he stared at me. It made my stomach churn and my voice die down. All of the things I wanted to say were far gone and forgotten. That look he was giving me, made me shake.  

 

“Well, if you change your mind, I'll be at the Marriott Marquis Hotel, Room 3304” he winked and then walked away. When he sat down, he motioned to his friends to look in my direction so they would look. They all smirked and waved at me. I stared at my Frappuccino on the floor. I wasn't in the mood anymore. I grabbed my stomach and rushed to the bathroom. I quickly went to one of the stalls and vomited. Then I washed my mouth and grabbed an extra mint I had in my purse.

 

“Are you okay!?” Dani asked exasperated. “What happened?”

 

“Finn is here, he-he—”

 

“It's okay. . .Let's go,” she quickly as she pulled me to an embrace.

 

We were walking, Dani was holding me while we were about to pass their table.

 

“Hello there, remember me?” asked Cameron looking at Dani. She rolled her eyes and made us both stop.

 

“Go to hell, asshole,” she said, making everyone at the table laugh. We kept walking until we got to her car.

I buckled in and started crying. “What did he tell you?” Dani asked as soon as she entered the driver's seat.

 

“He literally wanted to hook up with me again, even though he brought another girl” I choked on tears. "I can't believe him!"

 

“It's okay, everything will be alright. . .We'll go to your house, and then we can—”

 

“Can I just be alone, just drop me off, please? I seriously don't want to do anything. Thank you for trying to make me clear my head, but Finn just ruined it” I said. She nodded understandingly, patting my knee, then turned on the engine, and we started leaving the lot. But before that, I looked at the huge window and saw Finn staring at me, waving and winking. I shook my head and wiped the few tears that started escaping. I looked again and flipped him off.

 

• • •

 

“Will you be okay?” Dani asked concern plastered all over her face.

 

I nodded. “Yes. I will. . .I'll call you later”

 

“Get better, and don't let him get to you, he's just a douche”

 

“Thanks, Dani, for everything,” I said. She hugged me and kissed the top of my head.

 

“You're like my sister, I would do anything for you,” she said.

 

When she was leaving my driveway, I waved at her goodbye and then walked inside. My parents' car wasn't on their usual spot, so they haven't got here yet. I went to the fridge and grabbed the juice jar and glass, and poured me some of the refreshing liquid. I walked out of the kitchen and into the living room.

 

“Hello little sis,” said Alec making me jump with fear.

 

“Alec, you scared the living hell out of me,” I said and took a sip.

 

“Really? The feeling is mutual” he said, I sensed some coldness in his voice.

 

“What's wrong?” I asked. I placed my glass on top of the coffee table and then crossed my arms across my chest, and walked to be a little closer to where he was.  

 

“I walked inside your room to get back my laptop since I lend it to you yesterday, and what a surprise when I found this in your trash can bin,” he said and threw the box of the pregnancy test on top of the table. I gasped and covered my mouth with my hand. Now he was the one crossing his arms across his chest, waiting for my answer.

 

“I can explain”

 

“Good, that's what I want to hear. . .” he said, standing up from the couch. “An explanation as to why the fuck is my little sister with a pregnancy test?” he asked, trying to control his anger, obviously failing. I started explaining everything that happened a month ago and the results of the test. That was the hardest part to tell him. Plus, I told him the part about seeing Finn today at Starbucks.

 

“I was going to tell you; I swear. . .I didn't know how,” I said. He started pacing back and forth in the living room, breathing heavily. “You hate me. . .” I concluded, fidgeting with my fingers.

 

“No” he let go a bitter laugh. “I hate the one that did this to you”

 

“Please don't tell mom and dad. I will find the perfect words to tell them, I just—”

 

“Hey, it's okay. . .I'm here for you,” he said and hugged me, his face softened all of a sudden. I buried my face on his neck and exhaled his sweet cologne. When he pulled away he wiped one tear escaping my eye.

 

“Now. . .Where is this guy?”

 

“Why?” I asked furrowing my eyebrows in confusion.

 

“Because I'm going to kill that son of a bitch” he said and walked to the door. I rushed towards him and grabbed his arm.

 

“No! Alec, please. I don't want any more trouble”

 

“He can't get away with this, plus he was with another girl and kissing her like he hasn't done anything. He can't just walk around happily. Where. Is. Him?”

 

“He's—He's in the Marriott Marquis Hotel, Room 3304” I gave in. He grabbed my hand and dragged me to his car.

 

“He is so dead” he informed me and started the engine, driving out of our driveway.

 

“Please, don't kill him,” I said.

 

“Why are you defending him?” he asked.

 

“I'm not defending him; I just don't want any trouble. I'm already the one having a baby, so I will be the one that is dead once mom and dad find out. Don't add to the equation that you will go to jail for killing someone. Because I know you're capable of killing him because you love me too much”

 

He let go heavy a sigh. “I will just tell him what's on my mind. And I promise I won't kill him, but he is so dead to me and he should be to you too. . .”

 

• • •

 

When we got to the hotel, Alec parked and got out, then opened the door for me. He grabbed my hand forcefully and dragged me to the lobby.

 

“What's his name and what's his appearance?” he asked.

 

“Finn Harries. . .Dark brown hair, chocolate brown eyes, tall. . .”

 

“Excuse me, sir, you can't go up without a key,” the receptionist said.

 

“I'm sorry, but I'm looking for someone that hurt my sister in so many ways and took something that basically didn't belong to him. So I won't need a key since I will just speak to the guy and I will be downstairs in just a second”

 

The lady stayed frozen, but let us go in. My brother muttered a 'thank you' and then we went to the last floor.

 

“What room again?” he asked.

 

“Room 3304” I replied, mentally praying that he will control himself and don’t do something stupid that could make the situation worst. He searched for the door and once he spotted it, he knocked. I didn't want to see him, but I know that if I'm not here, my brother will certainly kill him.

 

Minutes passed by and they opened. Finn stood there. He first looked at my brother and then at me. He furrowed his eyebrows in confusion and then turned towards my brother.

 

“Hey, are you Finn Harries?” he asked.

 

“Yeah, that's me” he replied.

 

My brother nodded and then punched Finn with his fist right in the face. I covered my mouth with both of my hands. Finn grabbed his mouth with one hand and stood up. Some blood dripping from it. I noticed Finn's friends ready to jump in.

 

“What the fuck is your problem!?” Finn asked, nearly screaming.

 

“You mother fucker! Do you think that you can just come and hurt my little sister and get away with it? You piece of shit!”

 

“I don't know what you're talking about,” he said.

 

“You know exactly what I'm talking about, you had sex with her just a month ago. And guess what? She got pregnant because of you! And then you go out with another girl without even caring about what she might be going through. You're sick”

 

“Pregnant? What the hell?” he said and looked at me. He was shocked, so were his friends. Tears blinded my view, I had to look away.

 

“Can we go?” I finally found my voice.

 

“Gwen?” Finn tried to reach me but my brother blocked his way.

 

“You get near my sister, you go one inch close to her. . .And I swear I will rebuild your face,” he said and grabbed my hand, leading me towards the elevator. I looked at Finn, still grabbing his face due to my brother's punch, and with a shocked expression. I stared down not wanting to look at him anymore. I just want all of this to be over.

Chapter 05 - I'm here for You

 

Finn's P.O.V

 

To say I was shocked was the biggest understatement of my entire life. How the hell she got pregnant? She can't be. . .I used protection. Wait, did I? I can't remember. This can't stay like this. If she has my baby, I want to know more about it. She can't leave me like this, she just can't. . .

 

“Finn, what was that all about?’ another of my friends, Jack asked. I turned around. My friends gathered around staring at me with wide eyes, all with their mouths almost touching the ground.

 

“Finn?” Cameron rushed towards me. “Are you okay?”

 

Am I okay? Of course not. Even the punch in the face I received by her brother seems like nothing compared to how I feel inside. I don't know how to feel, how to act, what to say, what to do. . .I don't know what the hell am I supposed to do, and I have to do something, anything. . .I need to find her and get some answers.

 

Gwen's P.O.V

 

“Thank you. . .For punching his face” I said.

 

“Anytime. . .I told you that I would tell him how I felt. But I also felt like punching that fucking bastard, so I did” he said making me laugh.

 

“I missed your laugh, long time since the last time I heard it” he said honestly. I sensed some sadness on his voice, which brought my attention towards him.

 

“I don't know what I'm going to do” I said and briefly covered my face with both of my hands. We stopped at a red light and then Alec tilted his head sideways to look at me.

 

“I will be there for you, anything you need. . .Just tell me” he said. I nodded and kissed his cheek. When we got home, I grabbed the box of the pregnancy test and threw it to the trash can outside, not wanting to see it anymore. I lied in the couch, resting my head on Alec's legs. He brushed my hair with his fingers, kissing my head once in a while. He started watching TV, but I was too tired that I closed my eyes.

 

Hours upon hours passed by, suddenly I heard the click of the door and footsteps approaching us. I opened my eyes and stood up abruptly. It was my mom and dad.

 

“Hey sweetie, why so jumpy?” said my mom kissing my cheek.

 

“Hey kiddo” my dad said and messed with my hair. Then he messed Alec's, knowing he doesn't like it. Alec send him a playful glare and then kissed mom's cheek.

 

“How was your day, anything new?” my mom asked while placing her purse on the counter. I exchanged some looks with Alec and then turned back to our expectant parents.

 

“Not much” we said at the same time. My parents looked at each other and then laughed.

 

“Okay, crazy teenagers, we'll start preparing dinner. . .Gwen, do you want to help me?” my mom asked. I nodded and tried to put my best fake smile, she can sense when something is wrong. And today is not the day for her or dad to figure out. God, I can't even look at them without feeling so guilty.

 

One night. I wanted to let go for one night. To stop being such a nerd and try to understand teenagers these days. I wanted to have fun, to meet boys. . .Not this. Not having to carry a baby at 17. This is literally the worst day of my life, and I can't find the words not even the time, to tell them that their little princess, is pregnant.

 

When dinner was ready, I was starving. Usually I'm never in the mood for eating. So I grabbed almost everything my mom had cooked and placed it on my plate. My parents looked at me with weird faces, but didn't say anything. And Alec, well. . .He stayed quiet as well.

 

When I finished eating, I placed my plate in the sink and excused myself. I walked upstairs and into my room.

Today has been so stressful, my legs were about to give up on me. I lied on bed, hiding under my warm and soft covers. This day I've learned how much life can change in a matter of seconds. How from being a normal day, life just changed and I figured out that I'm having a baby, and the worst part is that this baby is from a guy that didn't even bothered to find me. To even know if I was doing okay. . .

 

I heard a light knock on the door, I looked up and saw my brother standing there, leaning on the doorframe. He waved at me and walked further into the room. I smiled and sat up straight to get a better look of him. He sat at the edge of the bed but did not looked at me first. He was just there, staring at nothing in particular. I didn't speak, his silence was telling me all. Although, growing up, Alec have always been the type of guy you can't hurt that easily. And if you did cross the line or betrayed him or hurt him in any way, he won't tell you, neither show you how hurt he is. I always admired that from him. You hurt me, and I will be choking on my own tears. Like today for example, when we were in front of Nash. I was supposed to be strong and don't letting him get to me. I failed miserably, and I made a total fool out of myself by crying and showing weakness. Luckily, Alec was there to defend me.

 

“I know that you're tired, and that today has been so horrible. . .But we really need to talk, G” he said and then looked at me.

 

“Alec—”

 

“We need to talk about this, even though I know this is the last thing you want to do. . .But, what are you planning to do?”

 

“I don't know. . .” I said honestly. I put a strand of hair behind my ear and played with my fingers. I don't know what I will do, that's the truth. I'm too young to be a mom, to have a baby. Is too much responsibility for a 17-year-old like me. I can act mature, or even think that I am. But the reality is that still I can't be a mom, I just can't. . .

 

“Alec, I'm tired. . .I don't have the answer that you want. Please Al.. .” I practically begged. He let go a long sigh and then stood up. He approached me and kissed the top of my head.

 

“I'm here, you know? Anything that you decide. . .I'm here for you” he said, almost making me cry again, but I tried my best to hold the tears back. We hugged each other tightly and then he turned off my lamp, just like when we were little kids and I used to get scared with horror movies. He would tell me nice stories with happy endings. And when I was still afraid, he would turn off my lamp and sleep next to me, promising me that he would stay until I was asleep.

 

I smiled at the sweet memory and felt nostalgia. I missed being a kid, life was way easier back then. No responsibilities, no drama, no consequences, the only decisions I had to do was what ice cream flavor I wanted on my cone.

 

And now I'm actually having a kid. And by a guy who doesn't even care? If you would've told me these a couple months ago I would've laughed in your faces. But this is what happens when I try to loosen up a little. And I can't believe I'm going through this, but is the cruel reality. . .

 

I can't stop thinking how this is my fault.

Chapter 06 - Abnormal Hunger

 The next morning, I woke up by my alarm going off. The more I think how much I need to wake up, the more I just want to stay here on bed. I fluttered my eyes open and then did an attempt of sitting up straight, it didn't work out so well. I lost my balance and fell into the ground. Thank God the covers fell along with me, because if not it would've been more painful.

 

I groaned and let go a frustrated sigh. I stood up and looked at my reflection in the mirror. Tangled hair, bags under my eyes, and dried saliva on my cheek. I looked like a zombie, perhaps worst.

 

The first thing I did, was washing my face in the sink of my bathroom. The fresh liquid making me feel instantly better. I battled with my tangled hair and practically gave up, so I put it in a vague bun. My stomach crumbled so loudly that I thanked God nobody was there to listen, that would've been embarrassing. So I rushed downstairs and tried to see what's inside in the fridge.

 

“Hello darling” my mom greeted me and kissed my forehead. I furrowed my eyebrows in confusion as I saw her sitting in the chair, her coffee mug placed right beside her Cover girl magazine.

 

“I thought you and dad be off to work now” I said and poured myself a glass of orange juice.

 

“Is our day off” she chuckled and took a sip from her coffee.

 

I widened my eyes. “I don't remember the last time you and dad had the day off” I said and sat down next to her. She smiled and looked at me, caressing my cheek delicately.

 

“I know. . .We asked for it, I know we haven't been present lately, and we want to change that. . .And expect more days like this” she said winking playfully. I couldn't help the smile that crept to my lips, but soon felt overwhelmed at the same time.

 

More time.

 

They will be home a lot more.

 

The baby that's growing inside of me.

 

Shoot. . .

 

I took another sip of my juice, feeling nervousness in the pit of my stomach. I closed my eyes for a brief moment, feeling nauseous all of a sudden. . .This is bad, really bad. I can't just tell them right now. It was already hard that Alec had to find out about it by finding the test in my bedroom. Now, I had to tell my parents. . .The question is: How?

 

I can't just go and be like:

 

“Hey mom and dad. . .A month ago I hooked up with this guy I barely knew in a bar and I just figured out that I'm pregnant. And also I love you, I'll see you guys at dinner”

 

This will be harder than I thought. . .

 

Finn's P.O.V

 

“Would you just calm down?” Jacob said while plopping down on his bed. I looked at him and send him a glare. I kept pacing back and forth, biting my bottom lip. The words of this guy still going around my head. Gwen is pregnant? How is that possible? Did I use protection? I thought I did. That night was such a blur. I haven't slept all night thinking about it. Today I woke up, pretending it never happened, but the second I turned on the TV, an episode of The Secret Life of the American Teenager popped up. . .And I went back to thinking about it.

 

“Don't you fucking tell me to calm down! Didn't you heard what that guy said? She's pregnant”

 

“You don't know that. . .W-what if she made it up?” said Cameron. “There's a lot of girls that make up the story they're pregnant just to get attention, there's no prove. I mean, you are famous Finn, of course she could be lying”

 

“Maybe, but—”

 

“Would you chill, bro? Don't rush things, okay? Look for the prove, research a little more” said Jack, while plopping down in a puffy couch. I nodded and gulped the lump in my throat.

 

“Okay” I said and took a deep breath. But of course I wasn’t quite convinced. What if she really is pregnant, then what? I don't think that guy who calls himself her brother would punch me for nothing. I need to find Gwen and clear all this up. The question is: How?

 

Gwen's P.O.V

 

I'm hungry. . .

 

But not the normal type of hungry. No. . .This is the type where I'm capable of eating a whole cow if I could. My stomach hurts so much and I need food right now. Is this what every girl goes through when pregnant? Horrible.

 

Its 1:00 pm and I'm setting the table while my mom is cooking. Which is weird you know. Usually I have to go get some pizza or do some sandwiches for my brother and I. Though I won't deny that I like seeing both of my parents here, is a nice feeling to have them back.

 

“I already set the table” I informed my mom.

 

“Great sweetie, could you please call your brother and father, lunch is almost ready” she said. I nodded and walked upstairs. I called my dad first, who was trying his best not to check up his phone. Then I walked to my brother's room. The walls full of posters of motorcycles and girls in bikinis, though I tell him to put them down. His guitar is one side, clothes are scattered on the floor, and his bed is messy as always.

 

“Lunch is ready” I said. He looked up from his phone and smiled.

 

“Hey mommy” he teased. I glared at him and put my arms in my hips. “Too soon?” he asked. I nodded. “I'm trying to make you smile. . .Sorry” he said giving me a sympathetic smile. I let go a sigh and closed the door behind me. I walked towards him and sat on the edge of his bed.

 

“I'm sorry, is just that I'm scared of telling them. . .I don't want them to find out the way you found out. . .”

 

“I understand, and I'll be there to tell them with you if you want” he said and kissed the top of my head.

 

“Thank you” I said. He nodded and then grabbed my hand, we walked together downstairs and sat in the table. Our mom smiled and served what seemed like the most delicious food ever. Seriously.

 

I poured in my plate almost everything. I don't know what got to me, but I just started eating like a mad animal. I grabbed smash potatoes with meat and some lettuce, I grabbed the garlic bread and broke it into pieces and ate them so fast I was afraid my stomach would explode; but I won't deny it was so delicious. I looked up and my parents and brother were watching at me like if I had grown a third eye.

 

“What?” I asked and furrowed my eyebrows in confusion, mouth full with the exquisite food.

 

“Nothing” they said in unison. I shrugged it off and kept eating. I have the right to eat, pregnant or not. I don't know why they're staring at me so much. When I was done, there was ice cream for dessert so I poured in a bowl 3 big scoops of chocolate for myself, and again they looked at me weirdly.

 

“Is it illegal to eat in this house now?” I asked harshly. Alec squeezed my knee under the table. I let go a sigh, not understanding these emotions. I'm not supposed to have this mood swings so quickly. It can't be for being pregnant, the baby is not there yet, or yes? I don't know. . .I'm just 17. I should've payed more attention in Character Education instead of reading romance novels. But who would've thought that I was actually going to need those tips?

 

“No, no. . .Is just that we're not used to, uhh, seeing you eat this much. Are you okay?” my dad asked. I cleared my throat and put a strand of hair behind my ear.

 

“I'm just very hungry. . .” I chuckled nervously. He nodded and kept eating. I glanced over at my mom who was smiling while looking down at her bowl. Alec excused himself and took his ice cream upstairs, so did I. I just didn't felt like staying there much longer, I have to call Dani.

 

I lied in my bed and dialed her number, she picked up in the third ring. I started explaining the events from yesterday and how my brother already knows. She couldn't stop gasping and I could just imagine her eyes widening as I tell her. Now, I have to figure out how to tell my parents. Which will be the hardest thing I'll ever have to do.

Chapter 07 - I just want to Talk

|One Week Later|

 

“Could this day be any longer?” I groaned and pressed my books tighter against my chest. Dani chuckled and put her arm around my shoulder, hugging me. I tilt my head sideways and saw her smiling.

 

“You're such a drama queen” she said. I rolled my eyes as we kept walking. A group of boys whistling while passing us by.

 

“Lesbi love” one of the guys said, he was blonde.

 

“Go suck a dick!” Dani said, which made me widen my eyes. The boys started laughing and playfully punching blonde boy. I laughed and nudged at Dani. She's such a classy one, right? We walked down the hall into our special spot, where we go in our free period. We just talk and talk, usually Dani gossips about the Cheerleader squad and how fake they are. Though she used to be a part of them until they kicked her out, due to the fact she went drunk to a game. Dani started hating them ever since.

 

“How're you feeling?” she asked in a whisper like if there was someone else with us. I shrugged and grabbed some chips from the bag she brought.

 

“Good, I guess. . .I haven't puked in 4 hours, that should he a record” I said.

 

“Did your brother really punch Finn in the face?” she asked laughing. I laughed along with her, though I know that specific scene would've gotten us in trouble.

 

“Yup” I said popping the p.

 

“Damn, I would've payed to watch that” she said.

 

“Don't you love Finn?” I asked in a teasing voice. “I remember all those times that you talked about how cute and funny he was on his YouTube videos”

 

She grimaced in disgust and shook her head. “Not after what he did to you. That bastard is going down. He's in my black list now. . .”

 

“Ugh. The damn black list” I said and crossed my arms over my chest, not able to control my laughter. That's a list she makes where she writes her 'mortal enemies'. You go to that list and is pretty hard to be off of it. Although, one time, she threatened to put me there if I didn't share with her my fries. And she calls me drama queen, go figure.

 

“Laugh all you want. . .But thanks to that list, I know my enemies. And darling, Finn. . .Is one of them” she said making a fist. I nodded and grabbed more of her chips. She quickly put the bag protectively beside her and glared at me.

 

“Get your own chips, you chip robber” she said.

 

“Oh, so you are capable of lending me your underwear. . .But you can't give me chips?” I asked in disbelief.

“That was, of course, a one-time thing. . .You seriously needed help. Those white virginized undies won't get you anywhere”

 

“Hey! They were on offer” I said defensively.

 

“Where? Target?”

 

“Ha-ha. . .Very funny” I said sarcastically. "And what is wrong with Target anyway? It’s a great store"

 

“I think I started disliking it since the mention from that Alex from Target guy. It was already getting on my nerves” she shrugged. I chuckled and extended my hand to get her chips. She didn't say anything but I still saw her glaring. At least she didn't bite my hand. Do not mess with Dani and her food. You will most likely lose an arm.

 

“Whatever. . .What are you going to name your child?” she asked out of nowhere.

 

“Wow, wow, wow. . .I don't even know if it’s a girl or a boy, or if I'm even going to keep it. I'm still in High School” I reminded her.

 

“Well, what else do you want to talk about, huh?” she let go a long sigh and sat Indian style.

 

“Well, the weather is nice” I said jokingly. She rolled her eyes and nudged my shoulder.

 

“Look, the baby subject is a topic I don't want to discuss. . .” I said honestly. She gave me an understanding look and then patted my shoulder. This baby is something that complicated my life 100% more. I still have no clue what I will do, as I said before. . .I'm still in High School. And I can't help but feel all these sudden mixed emotions. I just want to scream at myself for being so stupid. But I can't keep getting mad, that just won't solve anything.

 

So we start chatting about something else, anything actually. . .Something that makes me get my mind off this baby.

 

When the bell rang, we walked to our next class. That's basically how my day was doing. Raising hands in every opportunity I got, Dani sleeping, and my classmates just blankly staring at the board, pretending to listen; but in reality had no clue what was going on.

 

After school we decided we were just going to walk. So Dani parked her car in my house and we walked from there. I really needed this, fresh air. Is not like I can forget that dreadful past events, but I just feel like I need to get my mind off of things before I go crazy with all this overthinking.

 

Finn's P.O.V

 

“Isn't this great? Hanging out, together?” Clara asked while kissing my cheek. I just nodded, not speaking, my mind was elsewhere. She kept talking, not shutting up. It was getting annoying, but she's hot. . .So I'll just smile and nod, pretending to care.

 

“So there was this girl and she blah, blah, blah. And then I blah, blah, blah—” that's literally what I was hearing and I couldn't care less.

 

But then something else caught my attention. A certain girl that made me stop dead in my tracks. She was talking to her blonde friend, laughing. Then she stopped, and the first thing she saw. . .Was me. With widened eyes, she whispered something to her friend, which made her look at me. Damn, she was angry, but I couldn't care less, I have to talk to Gwen, now. . .

 

“Ugh. That girl again. . .” Clara said with a disgusting expression.

 

“Umm, you know what? We have to continue this some other time. . .” I said. She gasped and crossed her arms across her chest.

 

“Finn, baby. . .You're not going to leave just to talk to that girl who obviously needs some fashion orientation?” she asked while glaring at me.

 

“Uhh, yeah. . .” I said and kissed her cheek. I quickly started walking to Gwen's direction. But as I got closer, she took several steps back until she was running.

 

“Gwen, wait!” I said. Her blonde friend put herself in the way, avoiding me to go any furthest. I looked at her, my height obviously not intimidating her one bit. She was glaring at me while putting her hand in my chest.

“Leave her alone. . .Haven't you done enough already?” she asked.

 

“I need to talk to her about something. Is important” I said urgently.

 

“I know what you want to talk about, and that's the last thing she needs. Get away from her, Grier” she said trying to sound menacing, obviously didn't work. “There's no way I'm letting you follow her”

 

I let go a heavy sigh and picked her up putting her to the side. “See ya” I said with a smirk. She complained and tried to grab me, but I started running before she could do so. I ran so fast I know it was going to hurt tomorrow; but I needed answers, even though I basically know about this. The thing is, I want to hear it from her, not her angry brother.

 

“Gwen, wait up, please. . .Let's talk” I said as I watched her run, I was almost catching up since my legs are longer than hers.

 

Gwen's P.O.V

 

“Never! Get away from me!” I screamed as I tried to ran away from him the most I could. My chest was already hurting so did my legs. I felt them slowing down and I just wanted to vanish in the thin air, I want him to just leave me alone.

 

Suddenly I felt strong arms wrapped around my waist, making me stop. I tried to scream but he covered my mouth and made me walk inside a dark alley. I started breathing heavily as he turned me around. He put his arm beside my head, trapping me, his free hand still covered my mouth.

 

“Please. . .We need to talk” he said. “If I uncover your mouth, you won't scream, right?” he asked. I nodded slowly. Once he uncovered my mouth, I started screaming.

 

“Help!” I said, but he covered it again.

 

“Dammit, Gwen, quit it” he said. I bite his hand and he quickly let me go. “Shit” he said while shaking his hand uncontrollably.

 

“You tell me to quit it? You're the one that forcefully brought me to this alley”

 

“I want to talk to you, about you being pregnant”

 

“What makes you think we should talk about it, huh?”

 

“Because its mine too” he said and put his arm again beside my head.

 

“I don't want to talk about it. . .Let me go Finn” I said standing my ground. He gave me that look with those mesmerizing blue eyes, I had to look away.

 

“Please?” he begged. I looked back at him as I sighed, not believing I will just give in. I stood up firmly as I looked at him straight in the eyes.

 

“What do you want to talk about?” I asked and crossed my arms across my chest.

 

“When did you found out about this? And why didn't you told me before?” he asked.

 

“I found out last week, the same day my brother went to look for you. That means I couldn't have told you before, since I figured it out the same time you did, and why would you care anyway, huh? Aren't you too busy caring about yourself?” I asked, glaring at him. I couldn't believe this guy! First he drags me here, and now he's asking me such stupid questions. . .Could this day get any worse?

 

“I'm not like that, Gwen” he said.

 

“Oh really? You sure about that? I'm actually surprised you remember my name for starters. If you actually cared for me, you would've called me a month ago after that night. But no, I was just a one-time thing”

 

“That's what pisses me the most. You spend one night, just one night with a girl and have sex, and then they think they're dating. You girls need a reality check” he said raising his voice a little.

 

“Do you realize how much of a jerk you're being right now?” I said as I furrowed my eyebrows. He let go heavy sigh, shaking his head. He looked towards me, and I felt how his face was even closer than before.

 

“I'm trying not to be. . .But you're so damn complicated” he said.

 

I huffed. “You know what? I don't care. . .I'm out of here. You got what you wanted and now look who's the one suffering. I'm just 17, Finn! I can't have a baby. I just can't”

 

“Don't you think you're overreacting?” he asked. I gasped in shock and before I know it, I slapped him with all I had across his face. I don't know what got to me exactly, but he just crossed the line.

 

He grabbed his cheek, my five fingers got marked in his now swollen cheek. “Does it run in your family going around hitting people?”

 

“Just the ones that deserve it. . .” I said and pushed pass him, trying to walk away. He grabbed my hand and made me land in his hard chest. I looked up at him, his blue eyes staring down at me. I can't quite read his face; he just stares at me with a blank expression.

 

“We aren't done talking” he said and gave my waist a little squeeze.

 

“That's funny, because I was kind of done with this pointless arguing” I said.

 

“Sassy. . .I like it” he chuckled while brushing his long brown hair back with his slender fingers. “Besides, we're not ‘arguing’, we're chatting”

 

“Go to hell” I said.

 

“Ladies first” he countered back. I tried once again to get out of his grip but he was stronger than me.

“What. Do. You. Want. From. Me?” I asked, saying each word deliberately slow. He let me go and pierced his eyes with mine.

 

“I want to help” he said. “Is this baby truly mine?” he asked.

 

“What?” I asked, not understanding why would he ask such thing after everything.

 

“I'm just making sure” he shrugged.

 

“Of course it is, you idiot. I don't go around sleeping with other people” I huffed.

 

“Well, the way we had that night made me think you were pro” he smirked. I punched his arm and gasped at how he was remembering. He's such an immature kid, I can't believe how girls went crazy about him.

 

“I can't believe I ever hooked up with you!” I groaned.

 

“You came to me” he said.

 

I widened my eyes. “Excuse me? You sat next to me in that bar and told me how beautiful I am”

 

“That's not how I remember” he grinned and took a step towards me which made me take a step back.

 

“Whatever. May I go now?” I asked bored. I just want to go home and pretend like this encounter with him never happened. Thinking about Nash and the baby topic are two things I seriously don't want to discuss right now; it’s just stupid and nonsense. Literally talking to this guy is like talking to a wall.

 

“Not until you tell me what are you planning to do with this baby” he said.

 

“Finn, I don't know. . .What other answers do you want me to give you, huh? I don't know. . .I'm just a teenager like I said before. And you don't understand since you're just a guy!” I said nearly screaming. I took long breaths; I was starting to lose my patience. Soon, nothing will stop me and I will just stamp him against the wall.

 

“I want to take responsibility for this, please let me help you” he said.

 

“How can you help me, Finn? Please, enlighten me” I said sarcastically.

 

“Do you need money? Cause I have enough to help you” he said. And now I'm balling my fists ready to punch him just like Alec did, but harder. So hard it will make his eyes pop out of its sockets.

 

“I don't need your stupid money. . .You want to help me? Vanish away from my life” I said and turned on my heels to leave. He did not follow me this time, and I was so glad. I meant every word I said. He wasn't only being an asshole; he was offering me his money? Who does he think he is? And to think a month ago he was different, that it wasn't going to be just a one-night thing. How stupid of me to even get that idea!

 

Perhaps he's right in one thing: Girls always get that illusion that guys are any different. And that they will stay, when in reality just want you for one thing, and is not a long relationship. We have the dream of finding the right guy, but there's so few out there that actually mean the 'I love you's' or how much they care for you. . .It’s just a cliché story, but that's the story I want, honestly what every girl wants.

 

The flowers, the chocolates, when they open doors, when they hold your bags, when they don't cheat, when they look at you like a beautiful piece of art, when they kiss you and both of you feel the fireworks, when he holds your hand in public, when he introduces you to his friends. . .Those are the things I want. But what do I get, what do we all get: A guy that uses us, and when he gets what he wants. . .He replaces you like a piece of napkin. This sucks you know. . .And the worst part is that I made this happen, I can't stop thinking how this is all my fault. In some part it truly is since I allowed this, and this will taunt me forever.

 

He can't get out of my head. . .And the fact that I'm caring his baby too, makes me even sadder. I don't realize I started crying until I felt salty tears in my mouth. I saw Dani up ahead and the first thing I do is crash myself against her. She held me tightly, brushing my hair, shushing me. I kept mumbling 'I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm so stupid' into her blonde locks of hair. She didn't say anything, just kept trying to calm me. When we pulled away, I saw her looking up ahead, with a blank expression. I followed her gaze and saw Nash standing there, his hands inside his khaki pants. He didn't smile, smirked, grinned, moved, he didn't even blinked. . .He just kept staring at us.

 

“Can we just go?” I asked Dani. She stared at me and nodded, giving me a sympathetic smile. She grabbed my hand and we started walking the other direction. I glanced behind my shoulder. Nash was still standing there, I quickly looked away. . .

 

When did my life become so complicated?

 

Chapter 08 - Fighting like Cavemen

Finn's P.O.V

 

I couldn't move. I couldn't speak. Damn, I couldn't even follow her once again. How can I do any of those things if I made someone else miserable? The reason why I make Vines and YouTube videos is to make girls smile whenever they're having a rough day. Knowing I made someone so sad, makes me feel so, so, so. . .

 

Terrible?

 

Disgusted with myself?

 

Like a horrible person?

 

Like a conceited bastard?

 

I believe right now; I am all of those things. . .

 

I just wanted fun for one night. . .To be free and not care for the consequences and think what would be the right thing. I was drunk and wasn't seeing straight. I just saw this very beautiful girl with such a cute dress. She looked so innocent and pure. Now, she hates me. . .But I didn't expect anything else. She has the right to do so.

I just wish she didn't have to go through all this, that she could be happy. . .But what's done is done, and there's nothing I can do to take it all back. This sucks. . .

 

The only thing that crossed my mind in that precise moment, was how much I wanted to chase her and make her thoughts vanish away, call me crazy. . .Because I don't know her. But still, I screwed up, and now I have to take responsibility for my actions. I just got to find her. . .I didn't think twice and started running to keep up with them. It will sound creepy; I know. . .But I need to know where she lives. She can't escape if I corner her in her own house.

 

God, I sound like such a desperate Stalker. But at this point, I don't fucking care. . .

 

Gwen's P.O.V

 

When we get to my house, Dani hopped inside her car and waved at me. I waved back and wiped away the few dry tears that lingered in my face. She offered to stay with me, but quickly told her that she didn't have to worry, that I would be totally fine. Which was a complete lie, after my encounter with Finn, I don't think I will ever be fine after what he said. But I didn't want her to worry, she had to study for a test anyway, so why would she have to fail because of me?

 

When I walked inside I found my brother making out with this brunette chick. I gasped and covered my mouth as he was grabbing her left boob. He jumped away from her as quick as lightning and then nervously scratched the back of his head.

 

“Hey, uhh, Gwen, what's up?” he asked, trying to sound casual. But he was red as a tomato. “This is my-my classmate, Tiffany. We were, umm, we were doing homework”

 

I exchanged looks from him to Tiffany, who looked at me shyly while putting a strand of her hair behind her ear.

 

“Yeah, well. . .Nice to finally meet you, Gwen. I believe is getting late already, I should go. We'll finish someday else” she said while standing up. She grabbed all her stuff and then walked towards Alec, she gave him a kiss in the cheek. She looked at me once more and smiled, then practically ran to the door. I stared back at Alec and crossed my arms across my chest, grinning.

 

“We were just studying a few moments before” he quickly said.

 

“Right” I said sarcastically. “You were totally exploring the interior of that girl's mouth, and not to forget how you were just exanimating the texture of her left boob”

 

He chuckled. “Shut up. You weren't meant to watch that. . .”

 

“Yeah, you scarred me for life, big bro” I said. He came towards me and kissed the top of my head. Then he walked to the cabinet and grabbed some chips, eating a handful with his mouth open. I grimaced in disgust as I sat beside him in the couch.

 

“And I thought you would date Dani” I said with a pout. He looked at me and shook his head.

 

“She won't even give me the time” he said as he started watching an episode of Friends.

 

“Perhaps if you just stop flirting with her the way you do, maybe she would” I said. They would actually make a great couple, but Alec is always trying to pick up girls in a certain way. It works for some, but the rest, just wants to slap him in the face.

 

“She's mad at me ever since what I did to her before I graduated” he said.

 

“You hung her panties in the school’s flag” I reminded him which made him laugh. I nudged at his arm and he stopped, then cleared his throat.

 

“It was my last year, I thought it would be an amazing prank. Obviously she needs some sense of humor” he said, which made me punch him again, but harder this time. He turned to me and rubbed his arm.

 

“Why are you so violent today?” he asked glaring at me.

 

I shrugged. “I don't know; I just feel like I want to punch everyone that makes a stupid comment. And my target in this case is your arm” I said and grabbed some chips.

 

I excused myself and went upstairs, feeling so tired than usual. I couldn't even start my homework, which is the first thing I do when I come from school. But its Friday, so I'll just do it tomorrow.

 

Alec's P.O.V

 

‘And I thought you would date Dani’ Gwen's words lingered in my head. I honestly always had a crush on her ever since we were little kids. She's beautiful, funny, and so open. . .But is true, she wouldn't be interested in me. So to close that hole inside of me, I just date girls. . .That doesn't mean I still don't feel anything for her.

 

I grabbed my playboy magazine which I hid behind one of the pillows just when Tiffany rang the doorbell.

 

I was by the third episode of Friends, when the door rang. I groaned, cursing under my breath, and vaguely stood up. I left the bag of chips in the coffee table and glanced down at my playboy magazine, thinking how I have to disappear that before mom arrives. I walked towards the door and then opened it while rubbing my right eye. But then stopped dead in my tracks when I saw who it was.

 

“Now for sure I'm going to fucking kill you” I said.

 

“I need to talk to Gwen” that bastard said not backing away one bit. I grabbed him from his shirt, until we were mere inches from each other.

 

“Weren't you paying attention when I told you how I would rebuild your face?” I asked, using my menacing tone, but he didn't even blink, he stayed there put.

 

“I can't take a guy seriously when he tries to threaten me while having a breath that smells of chips and a Playboy magazine in the coffee table” he said.

 

Gwen's P.O.V

 

I heard screaming, and noises. . .So much noises. At first I thought it was Alec still watching TV. But then I heard things breaking, and that's when I stood up abruptly. I quickly got out of bed and rubbed at my eyes. I rushed downstairs to know where is that noise coming from.

 

I widened my eyes as I saw mom's favorite vase all destroyed in the floor, and multiple plates too. Then I saw Alec and. . .Finn? They were wrestling on the ground, punching each other over and over again. I covered my mouth with both of my hands. If they keep fighting like that they will kill each other.

 

“Alec! Stop!” I said and tried to grab him from his shirt. He was still on top of Finn, punching him, while Nash was kneeling him in the leg.

 

“Alec, quit it. . .Get off of him!” I said. When he saw me, his face softened and then stopped. He got off of him and turned to me.

 

“Don't tell me you gave him our address?” he asked, trying to control his anger. I quickly shook my head and almost choked with my own saliva.

 

“N-no. . .I swear I didn't!” I said.

 

He turned back to Finn, who was wiping the blood from his nose while standing up. “How did you know where we live?” he asked.

 

“I-I-I. . .I followed her. . .” he admitted.

 

“Oh, so you're stalking her, huh? Good to know so when I call the cops, they know why they will arrest you”

“I just want to speak to Gwen, man. . .” he said.

 

“We already spoke, Finn” I finally found my voice.

 

"What!?" Alec screamed.

 

“We spoke this evening” I confessed.

 

“You finished talking, I didn't" Finn said which made me look back at him. “I never intended to make you feel like that, I—”

 

“Save. It” Alec cut him off. “Why would she even listen to you? Don't you realize the damage you caused her!?”

 

“Because that baby is mine too. . .I have the right to speak to the mother, not the brother. . .So get out of it”

“Both of you, stop it! This is too much for me. I'm not only pregnant, but I also have to listen to both of you argue and fight like two little kids”

 

“He started it!” both of them said at the same time.

 

I let go a heavy sigh and crossed my arms across my chest. “I don't care who started it. . . Just know that mom's vase and plates are broken. . .So I want both of you to clean it up. Now!” I said. They glared at each other and Alec went to pick up two brooms, he handed one to Finn, who snatched it out of my brother’s hand too harshly.

 

They started cleaning the room, while I stared at them like a hawk. They glared at each other from time to time, but kept cleaning.

 

“Once this is done. . .You better get the hell out of here” Alec said.

 

“Not before I talk to Gwen” he started again. Ugh. . .

 

“We already talked, Finn. . .There's nothing else to discuss” I said and went to the fridge to serve juice. I grabbed three glasses and poured each one some orange juice. Alec glared at me when I handed one glass to Finn.

 

“Really, Gwen? Really?” he asked in disbelief.

 

“You might hate him, believe me. . .I do too. But that doesn't mean we have to mistreat him here” I said and took a sip from my glass. I glanced at Finn and he was smiling, but when I caught him, he turned serious once again.

 

“Whatever” my angry brother huffed.

 

When they were done, they placed the brooms back to its place. I saw Alec walking towards Finn, but I quickly grabbed his arm. He looked at me and sighed, then back at Nash, who was crossing his arms across his chest.

 

“Out, now. . .” Alec said in that tone I hate, he scares me when he acts like this.

 

“We'll have to talk about this baby sooner or later. . .And is better to get it over with sooner, don't you think Gwen?” Finn said and walked out of the door. I covered my face with both of my hands and sat at the couch. Is it so hard to ask for a calm evening? No, I have to battle with these two cavemen who almost kill each other just an hour ago. I'm tired, moody, hungry, I have this urge to punch the wall and then pass out in my bed.

 

“I want to kill him” Alec said.

 

“I know. . .” I said.

 

“How dare he come into our house after all he did! I just can't believe him”

 

“Me neither. . .But you shouldn't have punched him, or broken the plates and vases. Now what do we tell mom?”

 

“That-that they robbed us?” he suggested.

 

“No, Alec, she would freak out. I'll just take the blame for it” I said and stood up.

 

“What? Why?” he asked shocked.

 

“Because I'm tired and I don't want mom to scream at you. I never get in trouble so perhaps she will just give me a warning” I said and yawned, completely drained by the entire situation.

 

“I won't let you have the fault, just leave it to me. . .I'll tell her. Of course, I won't say the Finn part. But I know what I will do” he said and hugged me tightly.

 

“We're home—” my mom trailed off after seeing a bucket full of what it used to be her plates and vase, and the brooms beside it. “What happened here!?”

 

I exchanged looks with my brother, he scratched the back of his head and then turned to mom. “It was my fault, I was playing with my football, and I broke those; even though Gwen told me multiple times to knock it off. . .I didn't listen”.

 

Mom and dad exchanged looks before turning back to us. “And what about your face?” she gasped while rushing to his side, examining his bruised face.

 

“I-I got into a fight” he said.

 

"With who?" my dad asked while rushing to Alec too.

 

“There was this guy, uhh, bothering Gwen, I told him to get away from her, but he didn't listen. . .So I had to do it” he said and I found myself sighing in relief. My mom kissed Alec in the cheek, concerned plastered all over her face.

 

“Well, thanks for defending your sister. . .But I don't like when you get into fights. . ." she said. Alec nodded and then hugged me sideways.

 

“I would do anything for her, mom. . .I hope she knows that” he said turning to me.

 

“I know, big bro. . .I really do know that” I said and kissed his cheek.

Chapter 09 - Talking things Over

“Are you serious!?” Dani gasped as I was telling her what happened with Finn showing at my door. I walked towards my full length mirror and stared at my reflection. I already feel fat, and my bump has grown just one bit.

I touched at my stomach and let go a heavy sigh. “Yup” I simply said.

 

“Wow. Finn really wants to get killed” she chuckled. “He should come to your house more often”

 

“Umm. I don't think so. . .I just want him to disappear. He keeps insisting that we should talk, but that's not what I want. I don't even know what I will do with this baby, neither how to tell my parents. Having Finn just complicates everything”

 

“But don't you think that you guys should talk? I mean, he is the father after all. . .”

 

“Please, don't defend him” I said.

 

“I'm not defending him, G. I'm just saying that you know what is the right thing to do. You just don't want to face him”

 

And as always. . .Best friends are right.

 

“Yeah, but what happens if—” I was cut off by something hitting my window. I furrowed my eyebrows in confusion. I told Dani I would call her later and then hung up. I walked towards my window and opened it slowly.

 

“Hi there, mommy” it was Finn. He was grinning while putting his magazine on his lap. He was sitting on a lawn chair putting his hands behind his head.

 

“W-what, you, wait. . .What!?” I couldn't form a coherent sentence.

 

“I told you we need to talk” he said.

 

“If you don't leave, I will call the cops. . .You're in my property!” I said.

 

“Nah-ah-ah. . .I am near your property, sweetheart. After that line where your house is. . .I am basically in the middle of the pavement. You can't arrest me for this” he said making me speechless.

 

“You are such a—”

 

“Genius? Yeah, no need to tell me that, babe” he said smugly. I let go an exasperated sigh and closed my window a little too harshly. That jerk! How dare he!? After everything he did yesterday. . .Ugh.

 

I stomped my way downstairs, earning glances from my family that were sitting in the living room. I opened my front door and walked towards that idiot we know as Nash freaking Grier. He was there sitting, with a cocky expression. His long hair was pulled back with a red headband, he was wearing a blue t-shirt, and grey sweat pants.

 

“Missed me?” he asked. "I did miss you, babe" he said with a pout.

 

“I didn't miss you. . .In fact, I just want to kill you” I said raising my voice. “How dare you coming again, when we told you not to? My parents are inside and they don't know about—” I trailed off. “You know. . .”

 

“Aww. It breaks my heart” he said placing his hands on his chest.

 

“You can't break something that you don't have” I said and crossed my arms across my chest.

 

His hands fell to the side and his smug face was replaced with regret. “I'm sorry. . .” he said as he scratched the back of his head. "I'm sorry you're going through this. It is my fault, and that's why I'm here. . .I'm trying to take responsibility for what I've done to you. You don't deserve this”

 

That made me stay quiet for what seemed like forever. I sensed sincerity in his voice, but these days. . .You never know. I also thought he was a nice guy when we met; and looked where all of this lead us to. He was waiting for my response, patiently standing there.

 

“What do you want me to say to that?” I asked. “What do you expect?”

 

“I expect we have a civil conversation about this. . .Like mature people. And not having to fight with your angry brother every time I come around. My face still hurts”

 

“Good” I laughed. “I believe that was the point”

 

“I'm glad my pain makes you laugh. . .Your smile is more beautiful than your frowning” he said and put his hands inside his pants.

 

“Well, who is this young man?” my mom asked from behind us. I froze and stayed there motionless. But Finn just smiled and extended his hand towards my mother.

 

“I'm Finn, ma'am. Nice to meet you” he said with his charming smile.

 

“And why are you here?” she asked while crossing her arms across her chest. I started fidgeting with my fingers nervously while giving Finn a pointed look. If he tells my mom now, I'm screwed. . .Big time.

 

He stared at me back and nodded, then smiled. “I came here to talk to Gwen, you know. . .We-we are classmates. . .” his lie made me sigh in relief.

 

“Oh. How lovely. We were just about to eat lunch. Do you want to join us?” she asked. I stood behind my mom, and started shaking my head no uncontrollably, but he just grinned.

 

“I would love to”

 

He's so dead if he goes through that door with my brother there. I quickly ran to the living room and nearly tackled Alec.

 

“Wow, wow, wow. . .What's up with you little sis?” he chuckled.

 

“Finnisabouttocomeinsidesincemominvitedhimtoeatlunchwithus” I said so fast I'm lacking air.

 

“Can you repeat that? I didn't get it” he said furrowing his eyebrows in confusion.

 

“Hi there” Finn said, smirking at my brother. Alec was about to take a step towards him, but I quickly grabbed his arm. Why did my mother needed to invite him? And why did Finn had to say yes? Dammit. . .

 

“Alec, please, if you say something. . .I'm screwed” I whispered in his ear. He sighed, but didn't broke eye contact with that annoying blue-eyed boy, who was shamelessly grinning at both of us. Alec nodded and sat down on the couch.

 

“This is Finn, he's Gwen's classmate. . .” my mom chirped.

 

Finn smiled at my mother. “This is a lovely house. . .” he said. Is he trying to buy my mom? Good one, Harries.

 

“Oh why thank you, sweetie. How come we never met you? I mean, we do know all of Gwen's friends. . .”

 

“B-because he's a new classmate. He just got in this year” I said a little too quickly.

 

“But we went to the open house and we didn't see him. And that's the day where we get to see the new students” my dad butted in.

 

“I couldn't go to the open house, unfortunately. . .My cousin was very sick” he said faking being sad for just a moment. For a moment I almost bought it, but then I remembered he was just acting.  

 

“I'm sorry” said my mom. Finn nodded and then sat at the same time I sat too, he was in the chair next to mine. My brother across from him sending him daggers. If looks could kill, he would already be dead.

 

We ate hamburgers, which was weird since my mom almost never cooks that. But then again, she was never home, along with my dad. I didn't mind though; I love her hamburgers. I ate silently, while I watched Alec's and Nash's staring contest. It was sort of funny, but I'm worried that in one point they will just kill each other in front of my parents.

 

“So, Finn. . .In what class are you with Gwen?” my dad asked, trying to some small talk. Meawhile, I was sitting on my chair, wishing to bang my head against the wooden table. Please, take me out of my misery.

 

Finn chewed his food before speaking. “Every class” he lied. Thank God he's not my classmate.

 

“And what brings you here?” my dad kept with the interrogation. My palms were already sweaty; and it became even harder for me to swallow. I quickly grabbed my glass and drank the refreshing liquid. Please, dad, stop. . .

 

He glanced at me before turning back to my dad. "W-we have a project together, sir" he replied. I finished the remains of my food and then placed my plate in the sink.

 

Finn finished after and did the same. “I think is getting late, you need to leave. . .” I faked a smile.

 

“Gwen, he just got here, plus. . .Don't you have a project?” my mom asked sort of suspicious. I nervously chuckled and put a strand of hair behind my ear.

 

“Yes Gwen. . .” Finn said with a smirk.

 

“Fine” I sighed defeated. “W-we can go to my room” I said and walked ahead of him.

 

“Doors unlocked!” my dad and brother said at the same time.

 

“Believe me, I don't want to lock it” I mumbled more to myself. I walked to my room, but before opening it, I turned towards Finn.

 

“Listen to me, and listen to me clearly. I don't want you near me. I sit in the bed; you sit in the ground. Don't touch me, don't breathe near me, don't talk to me about anything else but this baby subject. . .Are we clear?” I said.

 

He smiled innocently and raised his hands up. “Good” I said and opened my door. I closed it, but didn't locked it. I can't let my parents hear this. . .I'm still trying to figure out how to tell them, but is hard. Soon, they will notice something is off. My stomach will grow much more and I will have to go to the Hospital daily. They will for sure interrogate me. I'm not good under pressure!

 

“First I will need your phone number. . .” he said. I turned towards him and frowned.

 

“Why?” I asked furrowing my eyebrows in confusion.

 

“Well, how else are we going to be communicated?” he asked and crossed his arms across his chest.

 

I didn't argue with that, he's right. . .Unfortunately. So I gave him my phone number, even though I didn't want to.

 

“So here we are. . .” I said as I sat down on my bed. He was about to sit down beside me, when I stopped him. "Haven't you heard me, Grier? I said if I sit in the bed, you would sit in the ground" I said. 

 

“You were serious? Wow. I thought you would want me closer to you” he said and made me lay on my back in the bed. Supporting his weight with his two arms. I tried to push him off, but he was so heavy, he didn't even budge.

 

“Knock it off, Finn” I said.

 

“I love how you say my name, Gwen” he purred in my ear.

 

“I am so close of calling my brother. . .He will beat the crap out of you” I said.

 

“I'm not afraid of your brother. . .In fact, is kind of fun wrestling with him. He gives me a challenge. . .” he said and finally got off of me. I sat up straight and brushed my brown hair with my fingers.

 

“We're here. . .” I said as I watched him sit in the ground. “Let's talk”

 

• • •

 

It seemed like an eternity when we stopped talking. We tried to figure out what we could do. How this could affect our lives in so many ways. How we would tell our parents about this. This will change everything for us, especially for him. . .I mean, he is Mr. Famous Viner in the end.

 

“Ah, my butt hurts” he complained, which made me laugh. He stood up and we stayed silent for quite a bit.

 

“I'm scared” I admitted.

 

His face was soft and he walked towards me. “I know. . .I am too” he sat next to me and looked at me straight in the eyes.

 

“How will I tell them?” I asked.

 

“I'll tell them with you” he offered, sending me a kind smile.

 

“You would do that?” I asked in disbelief. He nodded and then caressed my hand. I don't know what got to me, but I hugged him. I've been so scared lately, scared of what my parents might think. It feels so relieving to know that he's with me on this. Although that doesn't take the fact that he can be very annoying. . .But I'll just let it slide for now. He hugged me back, but tighter, resting his chin on my head. He started caressing my back soothingly, and somehow, the feeling was comforting.

 

“Ahem” we heard someone. I quickly pulled away from Finn and looked up to see Alec. He crossed his arms across his chest as he glared at us.

 

“Alec I–well. . .He was just—”

 

“Leaving?” he cut me off. "Yeah, that's what I thought. Now you, Harries. . .Out. Party's over. I don't want you any near my sister. . .You get that?” he said pointing at Nash with his index finger.

 

Finn nodded and stood up, he waved at me, but soon was pushed out by Alec. I sighed and stood up as well. I walked towards the window and saw Alec saying I don't know what to Finn, probably another threat. He looked at my window and waved at me once again, sending me a little wink.

 

I smiled and then lied down in my bed, thinking in all the things we talked about. But still, is not enough just talk. . .We have to do. And something for sure we need to do, is talking to our parents about this Finn's parents and my parents.

Chapter 10 - The Miracle of Life

 |2 Weeks Later|

 

I hate being pregnant. I know that this is my fault too, but I just can't stop complaining. I'm hungry all the time, and moody, and tired, I just want to sleep and not waking up. I don't feel like doing anything like I used to. I vomit too by the way and that's the worst part.

 

“Sweetie, are you okay?” my mom asked in the other side of the door.

 

Oh yes mom, I was just finishing vomiting the remains of my breakfast since I'm pregnant, but that's okay. . .I'm totally fine.

 

But I couldn't say that, so I went with a simple: “Yes, mom, I'm okay”

 

When I was done, I flushed the toilet and then brushed my teeth. I walked outside, and gave her my best fake smile, so she doesn't get suspicious. She smiled back and kissed my forehead.

 

“Sweetie, I'm going to the store, do you need me to get you any pads?” she asked.

 

“Mom” I groaned.

 

“What? I'm your mother, I have the right to know this stuff” she chuckled. “Do you have any problems, down there?” she asked whispering the last part.

 

“This talk is worse than the time where you send an e-mail to the whole family of when I first got my period" I said as I cringed at the memory. The next family reunion, my uncles, aunts, and cousins where bringing me a box full of pads and fake diplomas that they made with Word saying: Congrats! You're becoming a Woman.

 

It was just so embarrassing. . .

 

My mom offered to hang those diplomas in my room, and I had to beg her not to. So they're just in the attic, and they better stay there because that was just the most awkward and embarrassing day of my life.

 

“Anyway, call if you need something. Your dad went with your brother to a football game. Lock the door and windows and do not open the door to strangers, and if you happen to leave the house, remember to leave a note. Get that?” she said like for the billionth time. My mom repeats this to me every time she has to go out, but I know this procedure by heart. I nodded and I walked with her to the door. She kissed my cheek and waved at me as I closed it.

 

I let go a sigh and rest my back in the door. I touched my stomach and I felt something not normal. . .Is not a mountain, but is something growing. I shook my head and unexpected tears escaped my eyes.

 

I wrote a note and placed it in the fridge, like my mom told me, and then grabbed the house's keys, along my purse. I opened the door and closed it, walking outside, inhaling the fresh air. I needed to clear my mind, and being in this house is not helping at all.

 

I watched the cars pass by, the birds were singing, and people were walking. I tried to smile even though I'm going through this situation. I walked by a mini library and the first thing that my gaze met, was a Pregnancy Book. I curiously walked over to it and grabbed it.

 

“Pregnancy Book: A Guide to New Moms” was the title. I couldn't help but opening it. Chapter after chapter, full of information I didn't even know. There were pictures of babies, looking so cute and fragile, with pink chubby cheeks I just wanted to eat them with kisses. God, I'm turning into my mother. . .But I didn't care, I was feeling emotional with just reading this; is this even normal?

 

I bought the book and kept reading it, even though I'm in the middle of the street. But I just need to know. This book literally has things I just have to learn.

 

“First time?” I heard a voice from beside me. I tilt my head sideways to know who was the one talking. It was a woman that seemed like in her late thirties. She smiled sweetly at me and her gaze fell down into the book.

 

I nodded, sort of embarrassed of being caught. “I remember when I had my first kid. . .I was just like you. Reading, reading, and reading. . .Trying to get the most information I can. But the truth is, no matter how many guides you have. . .Babies do not come with instructions. You have them and with time you learn”

 

“I'm scared” I admitted. And I don't understand why am I talking to a complete stranger, but she just has that motherly aura around her, is so calming.

 

“And that's normal, darling, it would be so strange if you were not afraid by this. . .Every mom is scared when it’s their first time. All the doubts rush through their mind and they get worried constantly about their not-born-yet baby. I can assure you is totally normal”

 

“Uhh, does it, umm. . .Does it hurt?” I asked, blushing.

 

She chuckled. “Yes. Uff, you have no idea how much it hurts. But, when they hand you that beautiful miracle that you created. . .You see its face for the first time. . .All the pain vanishes away and is replaced by true happiness”

 

Those words made me lose it, and I started crying, literally in the middle of the street, people giving me looks like if I was crazy. But you know what? I don't care. . .I don't care if I look so stupid right now. I feel emotional and tired and I can't do this alone. I just can't. . .

 

“Oh darling, I wasn’t trying to upset you” she said with concern plastered across her face.

 

“Y-you didn't. . .I'm happy" I said as I wiped my tears. “Thank you”

 

She smiled. “You are such a lovely young lady”

 

Then I saw three kids running towards her. “Mommy, mommy. . .Timothy doesn't want to share his toy with me!” one of them said with a pout.

 

“Because he always breaks my stuff. . .” the other kid who I assume is Timothy, argued.

 

“Mom, make them stop, they're already getting on my nerves” who seemed like the oldest one said. He started checking his phone, not caring about his fighting little brothers.

 

“Kids, you need to learn how to share” the woman said. I smiled at the kids, they looked so adorable. The woman looked up at me and smiled as she saw my reaction.

 

“Your time will come. . .” she chuckled. I tried to held the tears back as I nodded. I bit my lip and watched as she came near me.

 

“I don't know you, but I have the feeling you will be a great mom” she said and hugged me, I hugged her back, suddenly feeling much more relieved.

 

I saw her wave at me as she walked away with her kids, the older one following her from behind, carrying the little one in his arms.

 

I put the book in my purse since it wasn't so big and then started running to get a cab. . .I don't know if I should but I can't stop myself. I go directly to Marriott Marquis Hotel. Once I was there, I rushed to the last floor and knocked on the door. Minutes later, Finn appeared with a confused expression, but then was overtaken with concern.

 

“Gwen, are you ok—”

 

I didn't let him finish that question, I just threw myself against him. I wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled him closer to me, not letting go. I kept crying uncontrollably, my lip couldn't stop trembling. He didn't pull back, neither argued with the fact I'm acting like this. He just stayed quiet and hugged me back, but tighter. He shushed me as he caressed my hair soothingly.

 

“It's alright, Gwen. . .Everything will be alright” he kept whispering.

 

“I can't do this alone, and I'm scared. . .I'm scared, Finn” I said, as he kept holding me.

 

“I'm here, you're not alone. Shh, I'm here” he kept saying. He kneeled down along with me and we were now in the floor, he rocked me back and forth as he kissed my head. I looked up and saw the other guys giving me an apologetic look.

 

I sobbed while I buried my face in Nash's t-shirt. I don't care if I'm crying in front of everyone, or if I look horrible right now, I couldn't care less. I just want to feel comforted in the arms of someone, I need someone. . .

 

“I won't leave you. . .I promise” he whispered into my ear. 

Chapter 11 - Painful Cramps

“Don't you want to call home? They might be worried” said Finn. I looked at him and fidgeted with my fingers.

 

“I-I left a note. . .I needed fresh air and to think, but it just became so hard all of a sudden” I said as I wiped the few dry tears left. Finn patted my knee and then stood up to walk to the mini fridge, where he got me a water bottle. I took it without hesitation and let the fresh liquid calm me.

 

I placed the bottle in the coffee table from beside me. “Thank you, for not actually kicking me out or something. I shouldn't have come without warning” I said and stood up.

 

“Don't ever say that, Gwen. You are more than welcome. If you need anything, just call, and I'll be there” said Finn which made me smile.

 

"Not only him. . .But all of us" said one of Finn’s friends. I believe his name is Jack.

 

“Yeah” the others said in unison.

 

“Thanks guys. . .” I said. “I have to go now. . .”

 

“I'll-I'll walk you home” Finn offered, which I didn't decline. I really didn't want to feel even more lonely. And walking by myself in this evening, will help with that feeling. I nodded as he grabbed my hand, and we walked through the door.

 

The walk was silent; Finn was still holding my hand. It was so warm and soft; I didn't want to let go. It felt so comforting to be around this guy. And I can't believe I'm saying all this stuff about him, or how I ended up in his hotel room willingly, or how I hugged him. Everything just changed so much, it is unbelievable.

 

Suddenly, a wave of pain hit me like a truck, which made let go of Finn to hold my stomach.

 

“Gwen, are you okay!? What's wrong!?” he asked concerned.

 

“I-I. . .Ah!” I gasped as the pain kept coming, it hurt like hell. I fell to the ground still holding my stomach, my eyes widened at the amount of pain I was feeling. It was like they were stabbing me over and over again. Finn quickly kneeled down beside me.

 

“It hurts; Finn it hurts so much” I said as tears fell down my face.

 

“Where, baby? Where does it hurt?” he asked while taking my hair out of my face.

 

“M-my stomach, ahh, my stomach!” I said. He placed one arm under my legs and the other free one in my back, and picked me up bridal style. He called a cab and minutes later we were inside.

 

“Nearest Hospital, please” Finn said to the driver, exasperated. I placed my head on his legs and he kept rubbing my stomach soothingly.

 

• • •

 

“What you were experiencing where cramps, which you get the first few weeks of pregnancy. There's absolutely nothing to be afraid of, it is totally normal. It’s a very common symptom when it comes to the first few weeks” the doctor said, smiling.

 

Finn and I sighed in relief with just those few words.

 

"I thought the cramps would stop because you're not menstruating" I said. I glanced at Finn who was shifting uncomfortably.

 

“Yeah, that's what a lot of women think. . .And is sad because they get so scared when they're attacked by this painful cramps; specially when they're new moms. And then come here, and I try to explain to them that this is a casual symptom you will experience, so there's nothing to be afraid of”

 

"Thanks, doctor” Finn and I said at the same time. He smiled and gave us a nod.

 

“How old you are again?” the doctor asked. I cleared my throat and nervously put a strand of hair behind my ear.

 

“21” I replied. He stared at me suspiciously.

 

“You look a bit too young to be 21, don't you think?” he asked suspiciously while crossing his arms across his chest. 

 

“A lot of creams, doc. . .” I said as confident as I could, but he seemed like he didn't buy it. He opened his mouth to say something but thank God another nurse came in.

 

“They need you in room 214” she said in an urgent tone. The doctor excused himself and then walked out. I didn't know I was holding my breath. Well, that was close. . .

 

“How do you feel?” Finn asked while putting his arm around my shoulder. I looked at him and gave him a weak smile.

 

“Fine, I guess. . .The pain is gone, at least for now” I said. We were like that for a few minutes, it felt nice. I pulled away from him and went to grab my purse so I can pay. Finn, watched me do it and then snatched my purse from my hands.

 

“What are you—”

 

“I'm not going to let you pay, Gwen” he said cutting me off.

 

“I can't let you pay, Finn. . .Now give me my purse” I said trying to reach it, but since he's way taller than me, he put it even higher.

 

“I'm paying and that's final. . .After what you've been through, it wouldn't be right" he said and took out his own wallet. I sighed defeated, knowing I wouldn't win against him. He grinned and then went to the front desk and payed. The doctor came back and gave me something for the pain.

 

“Drink it every six hours after you eat something, for the next 2 weeks and everything will be good, okay?” he said.

 

I nodded and smiled. “Thank you” I said.

 

“No problem” he said and walked out of the room. I looked at Finn who kissed my cheek.

 

“What was that for?” I chuckled.

 

“For being a great patient. Instead of a lollipop, you get a kiss from me” he smirked.

 

“And what if I wanted the lollipop?” I pouted jokingly.

 

“Shut up” he said and grabbed my hand. I giggled while we walked outside of the Hospital.

 

“I truly wanted the lollipop” I said.

 

“Seriously, Gwen. . .Shut up” he said which made me laugh harder.

 

The walk to my house was quiet, which was nice. I stared at the sun which was starting to hide, leaving a mixture of pink and blue. It was very pretty. Not a car passing by with those obnoxious honks, or too many people walking, no birds. . .It was a very clamed evening.

 

Once we got to my front door—which was very far away from where was the Hospital—Finn turned to me and smiled.

 

“Thanks for, you know. . .”

 

“No problem, Gwen. . .” he said and grabbed both side of my cheeks with his hands. He placed a single kiss on top of my head and then hugged me. And I can't believe I'm doing this but. . .I hugged him back, again.

 

How is it possible? I. Don't. Know. But that's just the way it is, I guess. I'm actually hugging Finn Harries. The father of this baby. The guy who simply acted like a jerk. The guy I hate with so much passion. . .I just don't understand anything anymore.

 

We were hugging for quite some time now, not letting each other go. It felt actually very calming and nice. I felt safe and secure, which should be the other way around. . .If Alec would see us right now, he would beat the crap out of Finn.

 

When he pulled away, he grabbed my hand, and caressed the top of it with his thumb. “Call me, if you need anything. Do not hesitate, okay?” he said.

 

I nodded. “But honestly, I shouldn't. . .My brother would be so pissed”

 

“Maybe” he grinned.

 

He kissed my head once more before turning to leave. While he was walking away, he turned around and waved at me, sending me a little wink. I rolled my eyes, but couldn't help the smile that crawled to my lips. I waved back and then walked inside my house. The smell of Cinnamon scented candles my mom always has soon hit my nostrils. I rested my back against the door and smiled. I don't even know why the hell am I smiling. But right now, I don't care. . .I want to smile while I still can, because I know these next few months, will be hell, I just know it.

 

And is not this baby's fault. . .I'm not trying to blame this girl or boy. I blame myself. Is not the child's fault, the fault belongs to the parents.

 

I let go sigh and then walked upstairs. I put on my pj's and then lied in bed, reading the Pregnancy Book. And I figured, the book makes it look easy, very easy. It tells me how to feed the baby, how to bathe the baby, how to know what he/she needs. But in reality, like the woman of today said, babies do not come with instructions. . .You start learning with time.

Chapter 12 - Memories on the Wall

 Finn's P.O.V

 

“She's beautiful” my friend, Shawn, commented while sipping on his coffee. I nodded in agreement as I strummed my guitar, ready to go to rehearsals. But, how could I concentrate when the constant thought of Gwen, lingers in my head? I truly hope she's fine. I told her to call me if anything is wrong, but that doesn't leave me calmed.

 

“Her friend though. . .That girl sure is sexy” Cameron butted in. I laughed and shook my head amused.

“I believe she made it clear that day in Starbucks that she wants nothing with you” I reminded him. He huffed and crossed his arms across his chest.

 

“That is to be proven. Not today, perhaps not tomorrow, but one day. . .” he stated which made us all laugh. I checked over my phone to see if I had any missed calls or text messages from her. . .But nothing.

 

“Finn, if she really needs something, she'll call you. . .In the meantime, just chill with us" said Jacob.

 

“I know. . .But I can't stop thinking about her. I made this mess and now we're in it together”

 

“So, she is pregnant” Cameron said and plopped down on his bed.

 

“Yes. . .So I have the right to worry now, right? I mean, I'm 100% sure she is pregnant for real”

 

Cameron stared at the ceiling and then at me, concerned plastered across his face. I sat down on my bed and fidgeted with my fingers. I just hope she is okay, because after what I made her go through, I wouldn't forgive myself if she ever got hurt in any way. I just want to know how she is.

 

Interrupting my thoughts, my phone buzzed, indicating me I got a new text message. 

 

Gwen:

 

Hey, just wanted to tell you I'm okay. Goodnight <3

 

And those were the only words needed to make me smile and finally relax.

 

Gwen's P.O.V

 

I placed my phone in my nightstand and grabbed my book. I just wanted to let Finn know that I am okay. He just that he looked pretty worried today, I had to calm him down.

 

I was already by Chapter 10 when I heard the front door being opened.

 

“Sweetie, I'm home!” I heard mom. I quickly hid the book on the top shelf of my closet and then rushed downstairs.

 

“Hey” she said while trying to place her grocery bags on top of the counter.

 

“Mother, is 9:00 at night, where the bloody hell where you, huh? I was worried sick!” I said jokingly with a motherly tone.

 

She laughed. “I got a call from my job and I had to check something in my office. Sorry”

 

“No sorry missy. You're grounded. . .No phone for a month” I said.

 

“Funny, darling" she said kissing my head. She poured herself a glass of water and then sat down at the table.

 

“Where are dad and Alec?” I asked sitting next to her.

 

“When they finished the football game, they went out to eat. I'll order pizza, are you hungry? Well, what a question, you're never hungry” she chuckled.

 

“Actually, I'm starving. Order an extra-large” I smiled and kissed her cheek. I plopped down on the couch and then started watching TV.

 

“Don't you have homework?” she asked.

 

“Already finished it!” I said proudly.

 

“Of course” I heard her mumble, which made me smile.

 

• • •

 

After eating pizza, the front door opened, revealing my dad and brother; they were both wearing merchandise from their favorite team. “How was the game?” my mom asked.

 

“Great! Best night ever!” Alec chimed.

 

“I can't believe I'm saying this but. . .I missed you big bro” I said. He smirked and then walked over to me.

 

“I missed you too little booger” he said and picked me up, placing me over his shoulders.

 

“Put me down butthole!” I commanded, but couldn't help the giggles escaping my lips.

 

“Kids, language” my dad said.

 

“C'mon, you used to love this” Alec said. Then he started carrying me bridal style. He placed a kiss on my cheek, and that's when mom started gasping and saying multiples 'awws'.

 

“This deserves a picture!” my mom squealed. I rolled my eyes but smiled anyway. She grabbed her Polaroid and snapped a picture. Alec put me down and went to see it.

 

My mom shook it and little by little the we started to appear. “It's so beautiful!” I said grabbing it, then showed it to Alec.

 

“We sure are beautiful people” he said.

 

“Don't forget humble” my mom said sarcastically which made me laugh.

 

“Hey, when you're good looking you're supposed to brag about it” said Alec defensively.

 

“Now I have another picture for my wall” I said. I rushed upstairs and neatly put it there. 

 

I smiled at the wall, watching all the good memories plastered there. Like that time, we went to Disney when I was thirteen, or my first birthday, or the picture that mom took of Alec and I on his first football game. Those were such beautiful moments that will stay in my heart forever, no matter what. . .

 

I lied in bed and closed my eyes, remembering all of the things we've done, the things we've accomplished, and the many things that gave us a reason to smile. That's how, I finally had a good night sleep after all these weeks. . .

Chapter 13 - Forbidden Messages

“God, I hate homework!” Dani complained as she sat across from me in our living room. I giggled as I closed my book. She looked so cute pouting like this, like when we were little kids and she wouldn't get it her way. She would make this face the whole day; eventually, her mom would give her what she wanted.

 

“You should've thought of that before leaving your Homework for Sunday” I said and watched her cross her arms across her chest.

 

“You act like my mother. . .I'm tired of hearing that same phrase” she rolled her eyes and then stood up, walking towards my fridge. I saw her grabbing a carton of juice, some cookies, a piece of Chocolate Cake my mom baked yesterday, and a cupcake.

 

“Don't you have food in your house?” I asked. "I'm getting pretty annoyed that you always need to harass my fridge, you know. . .”

 

“Rule number 1 of being a best friend” she started while closing the fridge door with her foot. “Always share your food with your best friend”

 

“I'll have to change a few of those rules” I said.

 

“You can't do that, G. Stop being selfish and share your food with me” she said and plopped down back in the couch. “Now, I want to think of me eating this delicious cake your mom made, instead of the Calculus homework I have to do” she closed her eyes and moaned while eating some cake.

 

“Are you eating or having sex with that?” I asked which made her laugh.

 

“I think both. Wait, here comes an orgasm!” she said jokingly while doing some disgusting sounds.

 

“Eww, that's gross. Stop!” I said.

 

“Actually, that turned me on” said Alec while sitting next to me. Dani opened her eyes and glared at my now smirking brother.

 

“Don't you have any friends? You know. . .College friends?” Dani asked while eating some cookies.

 

“They're boring and all they do all day is getting high and go to pointless parties, I don't want that” he replied while grabbing some cookies. I smiled at his response, knowing that my brother doesn’t go by peer pressure.

 

“Whatever” she huffed.

 

“Why do you hate me, huh? I am a good guy, Dan” he said.

 

“I don't know, honestly. . .I just want to punch you in the face” she shrugged.

 

“You guys will end up together, I just know it” I whispered in Alec's ear. He chuckled and then put his arms behind his head, a confident grin plastered across his face. He tilted his head sideways and then looked at me straight in the eyes.

 

“I know” he whispered back with a smug expression.

 

“What are you guys whispering about?” Dani asked furrowing her eyebrows in confusion. I exchanged some looks with Alec before saying at the same time “Nothing”. She frowned a little but then shrugged her shoulders as she quickly finished eating.

 

After that, we started watching a very old movie, perhaps from the year 2009. That's old to me. . .Halfway through the movie, my phone buzzed.

 

“Don't pick it up, imagine this is a theater. . .Don't interrupt the others” said Alec.

 

“It will just take a minute” I chuckled as I watched him pout. I grabbed my phone from the coffee table and went to a corner so I don't bother them. I unlocked it and saw it was a text message from Finn.

 

Hey.

 

It was a simple hey, no harm at all. But still I feel like I shouldn't be doing this. . .I mean, Alec hates the guy. Yes, Alec has the right to be angry at Finn, I am indeed still angry, but I'm sure he just wants to make sure that I'm okay, and that's very sweet we have to admit. I glanced at Alec and started typing a reply.

 

Me:

 

Hey, Finn.

 

He replied almost immediately.

 

Finn:

 

Are you okay?

 

Me:

 

Yes, I'm fine. . .

 

Finn:

 

Since you're still alive, would you like to do something fun with me?

 

Me:

  

It is kinda late.

 

Finn:

 

Does it matter?

 

Me:

 

Umm, yeah, its Sunday. Tomorrow I have school. . .

 

Finn:

 

Ugh, well that fucking blows.

 

Me:

 

LANGUAGE!

 

Finn:

 

You sound like my mother. Perhaps we can do something next Saturday? :)

 

Me:

 

I don't know. . .

 

Finn:

 

 Stop overthinking things. If its because of your brother, don't worry. . .He won't even know that I'm going there. The only thing you need to do, is jumping inside my car and we will go have fun.

 

Me:

 

I'll think about it :)

 

Finn:

 

That's basically an indirect no.

 

Me:

 

Finn, I'll think about it, really.

 

Finn:

 

Alright. Good night, babe.

 

Me:

 

Don't call me babe, is creepy.

 

Finn:

 

Every girl likes it when I call them babe ;)

 

Me:

 

But I'm not like those girls. . .You know that.

 

Finn:

 

I know, I really do. . .Good night, Gwen.

 

I let go a sigh and then turn off my phone. I went back to the couch feeling Alec's burning gaze on me, but I didn't look at him. “Who were you texting?” he asked. I closed my eyes briefly before putting my best fake smile and tilt my head sideways to look at him.

 

“Is not important” I said and grabbed a handful of popcorn. He kept looking at me, with suspicion. I started to get nervous and buried myself deeper and deeper in the couch. He has that typical stare that makes you talk, that's why I could never lie to him when we were kids, he would always find out.

 

“Are you telling me the truth?” he asked.

 

I nodded instead of speaking. He got a bit closer to my face, but I was watching straight to the TV. I glanced at Dani who was passed out, so I couldn't ask for help in this one.

 

“So you weren't speaking to a certain boy who happens to have chocolate brown eyes and is one of the biggest stars at the moment, am I right?” he whispered in my ear. I gulped the lump in my throat and took a long breath, he's making me even more nervous with all this interrogation. I've never been good hiding secrets, especially when it comes to keeping things from him, and he's using that against me.

 

I got away from him to the far corner in the couch so we can have space enough to look at each other face to face.

 

“Why would I lie to you, big bro?” I asked giving him an innocent smile. He crossed his arms across his chest.

 

“Okay then. . .I trust you little booger. You're my sister, my only sister. . .And I don't want you to get hurt” he said.

 

“I know” I said simply. He stood up from the couch and then kissed my forehead. Then he went towards Dani, he smiled sweetly at her, with such adoration in his eyes, I couldn’t help smiling at just the sight of it. He hesitated a little, but he finally leaned in to her and placed a single kiss on her cheek.

 

He looked at me and yawned. “I'll go to bed; you should do the same. . .” he said. I nodded and watched him turned on his heels to go.

 

“Alec” I called him. He turned towards me and furrowed his eyebrows. “I love you, you know?”

 

He smiled. “I know. . .I love you too. Good night princess” he said.

 

“Good night. . .My knight in shining armor” I said which made him chuckle. When he left I sat beside Dani who was still sleeping. I started caressing her hair while thinking in everything that's been happening lately. How everything is so messed up but at the same time is so beautiful. Is that even possible? I'm not sure anymore. I just know that as the days pass by is becoming harder to tell my parents, and to tell the truth to Alec about Nash that he has my phone number, that I've talked to him more than once.

 

When did life became this complicated? When did I started to grow up? I still remember my 6th birthday, where I didn't have to think or decide anything. My parents would do that. My parents would make my decisions and I would be okay with that . .Now with 17 I made a mistake that could cost me everything. School, family, life.

 

What am I going to do?

Chapter 14 - The Old Times

 I woke up with a terrible pain in my neck. I groaned as I massaged it to relieve some damage, but it just hurt more. I rubbed my eyes and realized I fell asleep in the couch, in not a very comfortable position if may I add. . .

 

“Hey, Dani, wake up” I said, shaking her slightly. She groaned but I kept shaking her trying to make her open her eyes.

 

“Go away” she said.

 

“No, we have to get ready, is a school day” I said. “C'mon Dani”. She sat up straight still with her eyes closed and then out of nowhere pushed me out of the couch. I stared at her with widened eyes while I was in the floor.

 

“Ow, what was that for!?” I asked standing up.

 

“You were annoying me” she said with a glint of a smile across her delicate face. I rolled my eyes and then went to the nearest cabinet in the kitchen. Mom saved this horn from when we were kids and I fought with Alec. She would scare us just with pressing the button.

 

I put on some random earphones I found on the counter and then put them on. I pressed the button to release the noisy sound. Dani opened her eyes abruptly and then fell off the couch just like I did. She lied on the ground looking up at me, her messy hair almost covering her face.

 

“What was that for!?” she asked angrily, sending me a deathly glare.

 

“You were annoying me” I said using her exact same words. I smiled innocently as I watched her stand up.

 

“You're unbelievable” she let go a sigh and walked towards my fridge. I followed right behind her and then leaned my back against the counter, crossing my arms across my chest, with a huge grin on my face.

 

“I know” I giggled. I have to admit that even when Dani wakes up, she looks beautiful. . .But, when someone is pretty, that person is pretty in any way, doing anything. Me, by the other hand, know that look like a total scarecrow. I don't need to look at myself in a mirror to know that I look like a total disaster.

 

“Being pregnant sure makes you annoying” she said. I quickly covered her mouth.

 

"Shh. . .Are you crazy!? We can't talk about that in here. I mean, what if my mom was coming here when you said that, or my dad?"

 

“You'll have to tell them eventually; you know. . .”

 

“I know; I just need some time to think in the best words. I can't just go and throw them such a bomb like that one. I will tell them, but not now, not today”

 

Dani poured in 2 cups chocolate milk, which made me smile because it used to be our favorite thing to drink.

“Where had the years gone by?” I asked.

 

She looked at me and then to her cup, she took a sip and sighed. “I don't know, honestly. It felt like yesterday when we first met that day when we were eight. The first thing I noticed was that big teddy bear you were hugging tightly because of your nervousness; I remember that beautiful dress you were wearing. Of course, you were literally afraid of everything” she laughed as I nudged her playfully.

 

“That's not true!” I said laughing along with her.

 

“Anyway, I wanted you to sit next to me so badly, and that's where I asked you your name. I thought that dress you had on was gorgeous” she said and smiled, remembering it.

 

“I miss those times. . .Where we had no choices, no responsibilities, no growing up, no drama. . .It was just playing and eating candy”

 

“Yeah” she said nodding in agreement.

 

“Good morning girls” my mother said.

 

“Hey mom” I said. She kissed my forehead and then started making coffee. My dad walked down the stairs, rubbing his blue-grey eyes. His blonde hair was messy and he was wearing a simple white shirt.

 

“Hi dad” I said.

 

He smiled. “Hello pumpkin” he said and then picked me up, hugging me tightly. I gasped and started laughing, I tried to get away from his grip but it was impossible.

 

“Dad, put me down!” I demanded but he just chuckled.

 

“Alec was right, what happened to you, huh? When you were little you used to love being carried like that, you would cry and scream if we let you anywhere near the floor, since you thought it was ‘lava’”

 

I kept laughing cause its true. But it’s like I just tell you. . .I grew up, that's why I don't believe is fun anymore. When I was younger, I loved pretending I was in a mission to escape from a volcano. So Alec and I used to put all the pillows we would find and placed them on the ground. We would jump in them trying not to touch the ground. God, how we loved that game. . .

 

He finally put me down and I nudged him playfully. He chuckled and then grabbed my head with both of his hands and placed a kiss on my forehead.

 

When we finished eating breakfast, I helped my mom place the plates in the sink. “Please go wake up your brother” my mom said. I sighed but nodded. Usually he doesn't like to wake up, you literally need to offer him ice cream for him to even budge, like when we were kids.

 

I walked inside his room and almost tripped with his stupid skateboard. “Ugh. Alec” I mumbled annoyed. I went to his bed and shook it, I took the covers off of him, but he wasn't there. Instead, there were pillows. I furrowed my eyebrows in confusion and then turned around, just to be attacked by a dart right in my forehead. It was Alec with his dart thrower.

 

“Really Alec? Really?” I said and put my hands in my hips.

 

“Cool, huh? I found it in my closet” he said.

 

I rolled my eyes playfully. “Well. . .I see you haven't lost your techniques” I said jokingly.

 

He nodded. “I haven't” he said and put himself in a fighting position, aiming at me. I grabbed the nearest pillow to protect myself and then rushed towards him. I sort of tackled him but he pushed himself against my pillow and started pushing me towards his bed. He put his weapon aside and stole my pillow, throwing it away, the smirk never leaving his face.

 

“Great memories. When you actually thought that you could beat the master” he said jokingly. I rolled my eyes and tried to move but he didn't budge.

 

“Alec, let me go!” I demanded, but couldn't help but giggling.

 

“Why should I? This had just begun” he said and then started tickling me non-stop. I started laughing so hard my stomach started hurting. He was tickling me in my weakest spot: My stomach and my neck.

 

“Stop! Please!” I said as I struggled to get away from his grip, but he didn't budge. Is this the way I'm going to die? Dying of laughter.

 

“What is going on here?” I felt relieved when I heard Dani walking into the room. I approached now that he's distracted and I got away from him.

 

“I've never been so happy to see you in my entire life” I said out of breath.

 

“Oh well, thank you, being your best friend, is happy to hear that” she said sarcastically. “Aren't you always happy to see me?” she asked.

 

“Of course, is just that today I feel extremely happy that you're here. . .I mean, that boy was tickling me to death”

 

“Whatever, your mom is asking what is taking you so long? Now I see what you guys been up to”

 

“Do you want to play?” my brother asked while sending her a mini wink. “Although, I have to warn you. . .I won't play with you that same way I play with my sister. I like to do things a little more rough”

 

“You're so gross” Dani said while grimacing in disgust. “Now, get ready, your mom says you can't be late for College again” she said and then pulled me outside, closing the door from behind her.

 

“Let's go. . .” she said and we walked downstairs. I said goodbye to my parents and then went to Dani's car. The first thing I did, was turning the volume of the radio all the way up, trying my best to distract me. I feel the need of getting distracted all the time. . .If my mind is occupied, then I wouldn't be thinking about you know what. No matter what I do though, the problem is always there, waiting for me, right around the corner.

 

I sang along the words, closing my eyes as the beautiful melody of the song My Heart Wants what it Wants, played on the radio.

 

“I never understood why you never stayed on Chorus. You have a beautiful voice. It’s been years since the last time I heard you singing actually” I heard Dani from beside me. I chuckled and shook my head as I opened my eyes.

 

“Because there was this very mean kid on Chorus who always tried to put me down” I said.

 

“Really? You let a bully get to you?” she asked in disbelief.

 

“You know I've never been good with rude comments directed to me. Besides, I don't have to stay there to receive every mean remark that kid had for me”

 

“Where is he by the way?” she asked while making a U turn.

 

I shrugged. “Heard he move; I was so happy when they told me that. But still, I didn't want to return to chorus, I had to study and—”

 

“Blah, blah, blah. . .Excuses” she said.

 

“Is true!” I said defensively. “I had to focus in school and in projects and all that stuff” I crossed my arms across my chest.

 

“I miss those times where you would just play guitar and enjoy it. The house was filled with your talent. . .It was absolutely beautiful”

 

“Thank you. But everything that have been happening, I don't think I have the enough time to play anymore. I mean, I am having a baby” I tried to smiled.

 

She nodded in agreement. “I understand, girl, I truly do. . .And I'm here for whatever you need, okay?” she said and patted my knee.

 

I nodded. “Okay”

Chapter 15 - New Boy

The first thing I did when I crossed the main doors was going to my locker, Dani following close behind me. "You know what is so cool?" she asked while leaning her back against the locker from beside mine.

 

“What?” I asked.

 

“Disney Princesses, you know. . .The ones that work at Disneyland. . .They're supposed to be between 5'4 and 5'8. Plus, they can't wear nail polish. And they're not allowed to say to a guest that ‘they don't know’ whenever they're asked a question. . .They have to go and find the answer” she said.

 

“And you're telling me that because you're going to become a Disney Princess?” I asked.

 

“Well, no. . .But wouldn't it be cool to work at the happiest place on earth!?” she said in her usual cheery voice; which sometimes I find very annoying at this time of day. But, that's the way she is, and I love her.

 

I chuckled and shook my head in amusement. “Thank you, for those interesting facts about Disney Staff members”

 

“You know they're not actually called Staff members, they're called Cast members, like if they formed a movie” she said.

 

I rolled my eyes and smiled at her cuteness and excitness whenever she tells me one of her facts. I fished out my books for first, second, and third period, and let me tell you something. . .Not one of my greatest ideas.

 

“I told you multiple times not to carry those books all at ones” Dani said while crossing her arms across her chest. I kept struggling to hold them, but it became impossible, they were too heavy.

 

“I'll see you later. . .Ms. Payton said that if I get one more late pass I will go to Detention, and I can't be with all those future delinquents. . .I just can't Gwen!” she said. I nodded and saw her disappear among the crowded hallways.

 

Being the clumsy person that I am, I tripped with my own feet, causing the books and myself to fall. People turned their attention towards me, some people bickering around and others just commenting. I rolled my eyes and put a strand of hair behind my ear.

 

“Great” I let go a frustrated sigh and started to pick up my scattered books and papers.

 

“Hey, let me help with that” I heard someone from in front of me. I slowly looked up and saw this very tall boy, with blonde messy hair, and brown eyes. He was wearing jeans and a white shirt with the word 'Obey' on it. I smiled shyly and quickly stood up.

 

"Umm, it’s-it’s okay. . .I can do it" I said.

 

"Non-sense! A girl like you should not be near the floor, I shall do it" he said jokingly. I chuckled and saw him grab my stupid books.

 

“Thanks” I said as he handed them to me.

 

“I'm Austin” he said as he extended his hand for me to shake it. I did and smiled politely. 

 

“Gwen” I replied. “Are you new here?”

 

“Umm, yeah. I got in luckily though. Is very rare that someone just goes in a school in the middle of the year. Is just that I'm the principle's son, so that has some advantages” he grinned.

 

“That's great, and very lucky. I hope you like it here” I said.

 

“Believe me, I already am enjoying it here” he said and kept staring at me. I opened my mouth and then closed it again, and then put a strand of hair behind my ear.

 

“That's good, I'm-I'm glad” I said nervously. He crossed his arms across his chest and chuckled. The bell rang. “Dammit” I said under my breath.

 

“What's the matter?” he asked.

 

“I'm going to be late” I groaned.

 

“To what class you need to go?”

 

“Literature” I replied.

 

“That's where I need to go. . .Don't worry, Gwen. Come with me” he winked. I nodded but knitted my eyebrows in confusion to what he meant. I do really have to worry; this school is very strict with getting on time. When we walked inside the class, all eyes were on us. Some girls fixing their hair and sighed dreamily when they looked at Austin. And I don't blame them, the boy is very handsome.

 

“Sorry we're late” he said looking at our teacher, Mr. Anders. He fixed his glasses and then looked straight at us, with a stern look on his face. It made me swallow the lump in my throat. God, I hate being late.

 

“Why are you both late?" he asked while sitting on his chair.

 

He smiled. “My mother was speaking to me about some rules of this school, and she said that Gwen can show me around. . .My apologies, sir”

 

“And who's your mother, young man, huh?”

 

“Principal Edwards. You know her. . .She's the one that gives you your monthly check” he said and casually put his hands inside his jeans pocket. The class was soon filled with the students saying mutliple "ohhhhh's".

 

Mr. Anders cleared his throat and then put on the fakest smile I've ever seen in my entire life. “Of course, uhh. . .Don't let this happen again. Please, both of you, sit down. . .” I sighed in relief and then exchanged some looks with Austin as we sat down. The class went by very quickly, and I couldn't be more thankful.

 

I sat in my usual spot at lunch, with my tray in my hands. Today there was Hamburgers, and they smelled so good. I don't know if it is because I'm pregnant, but School's hamburgers have never smelled so delicious. Dani sat down next to me, with a frown on her face as she saw me stuff my mouth with a hamburger.

 

“You eat like a savage animal” she commented. “I'm surprised you haven't grown a tail by now”

 

“Ha-ha, very funny” I said sarcastically while rolling my eyes. “Well, excuse me, but there's a certain person inside of me, who can't stop eating and vomiting all the time. So I'm sorry if my new eating habits annoy you”

 

She let go a long sigh. “I'm sorry, you're right. . .I was just joking” she turned to her tray and fidgeted with her fingers. I finished swallowing and then looked at her straight in the eyes, although she was not once looking back at me.

 

“It’s okay, don't feel bad about it. If I spat at you for no reason at all, even if it’s when you're joking, don't take it the wrong way. . .Since I'm you know what, I get annoyed very quickly. I feel uncomfortable, and the pain that I have in my stomach is unbearable” I groaned.

 

Finally, she stared back at me. “I love you, you know that, right? You are not my best friend, not anymore. . .You're my sister”

 

“I love you too, sis” I said and smiled.

 

“Aww, when are you two lesbis going to kiss already? Us guys here are waiting” the same guy that teased us the other day that we are lesbians, said. His friends laughing and whistling. Dani rolled her eyes and stared at blonde boy, who is now smirking.

 

“Do you want me to tell your father—who happens to work at a church by the way—that you lost your virginity with a hooker?” Dani asked and crossed her arms across her chest, while smiling innocently. He quickly shook his head, his skin turned pale all of a sudden.

 

“Don't provoke me, pretty boy” she said. The group of guys quickly walked away, blonde boy cursing under his breath.

 

I turned to Dani and high fived her. “You're evil. . .And I love it” I said. She giggled and then put a strand of her hair behind her ear.

 

“I know, and I love being like this too” she winked.

 

“Hello Gwen, and hello, umm. . .Gwen's friend” said Austin, sitting across from us at the table. I smiled at him and finished eating. I stood up and went to the nearest trash can to throw away my stuff. I grabbed from my purse my hand cream and then rubbed my hands, smelling at it once in a while. Dani and Austin exchanging some looks and then looked at me.

 

“What?” I asked furrowing my eyebrows in confusion. "I hate when the smell stays in my hands"

 

“Okay. . .” Dani said and then hold up her phone texting someone.

 

“Anyway, I came here because I wanted to invite you and your friend, umm—”

 

“Dani” she answered, not once looking up from her phone.

 

“Dani” he repeated. "To my party this Friday"

 

“What? Party? Aren't you new?” I asked.

 

“Yeah, but that doesn't mean I'm new in the country, I know people, Gwen. . .” he smiled and then stood up from the table. “Are you in?” he asked.

 

“S-sure, I would love to. But why would you invite me? You barely know about me. For all you know, I could be a freak that has a collection of vodoo dolls” I said jokingly.

 

He chuckled. “You don't look like one, plus. . .You were nice to me, let's get to know each other”

 

“Umm. . .” I giggled nervously. “Sure, uhh, of course. . .We will go” I answered. He smiled and it was such a contagious smile, he has cute dimples.

 

“Well, its settled then. . .I expect both of you at my house Friday at 9:00. I'll text you my address”

 

“But I don't have your number—”

 

“Already on it” he said while giving me a card. “You'll text me your number” he sent me a wink and then walked away. I stared at the card and sure enough, his number was written there with a message.

 

“Hope to see you there, beautiful ;)”

 

I knitted my eyebrows together, feeling slightly creeped out, but he doesn't look like a bad guy. At least he called me beautiful, and not something worst. I hate it when guys tell you stuff like 'sexy' or 'nice legs'. I have pretty eyes; can't you compliment them? I have nice hair; can't you compliment it? I mean. . .Come. On. Being called beautiful is way better that being called hot.

 

I smiled at his words. He seems like a nice guy, but I have to wait and get to know him. . .And that would be at the party this Friday.

Chapter 16 - Overprotective Best Friend

The week passed by very quickly and before I know it, is already Friday. Dani called, asking what I would wear. “Jeans and a black blouse” I answered simply while applying light make-up. She started laughing, literally. “What's so funny?” I asked furrowing my eyebrows in confusion. Ones she stopped, she took a long breath before answering.

 

“You have to wear a dress” she said.

 

“I want to be comfortable, you know. . .And you're lucky I'm even wearing make-up” I replied while sitting down on my bed. There's no way I'm changing clothes. She should be thankful that I even agreed to wear heels.

I stood up from my bed and put my hair in a fancy bun. I smiled at my reflection in the mirror, and then caressed my stomach.

 

The bump. . .

 

Not once thought in telling my parents. My chest tightens every time I think about it. I hope I can forget about it for just tonight and have fun. But knowing me, I will probably just end up in a corner since people usually want to hang out with Dani, which I don't blame them; Dani will make you feel like the most special person ever, she's funny, and cute in her own weird way. Sometimes I even get jealous whenever the thought of her leaving crosses my mind. But she reassures me that she prefers me instead of those 'cool kids'

 

My phone buzzed, letting me know I got a new text message. I grabbed it and then unlocking, the text popped up.

 

Finn:

 

You never answered me if we're going out tomorrow ;)

 

I bit my bottom lip and then started typing a reply.

 

Me:

 

I still don't know, and I can't talk right now. . .I'm going out.

 

Finn: 

Without me?

 

Me:

 

We shouldn't even be having this conversation. . .Finn, I can't go out with you.

 

Finn:

 

You're afraid your brother will find out?

 

Me:

 

Actually yes, I'm scared. . .He trusts me, and I had to lie when you texted me last weekend.

 

Finn:

 

Why don't we talk outside of your house? :)

 

Me:

 

What do you mean?

 

No reply.

 

Me:

 

Finn?

 

Suddenly I heard my name being called outside at my front yard. “Oh, God” I rushed to my window and opened it widely. There stood Finn, crossing his arms over his chest, smirking shamelessly.

 

“What's the matter with you!? You can't be here” I said. I covered my mouth with both of my hands and prayed that no one sees him here.

 

“I came to see you”

 

“Well, you can't. . .” I shrieked.

 

“Oh come on. . .You're seriously going to kick me out? Aww”

 

I rushed downstairs and took long strides towards him. I raised my hand, ready to slap him for coming here, but he grabbed it in mid-air. I gasped and tried to get away from his grip, but of course he's stronger than me.

 

“I won't get slapped by you anymore. . .This time, I actually saw it coming. You've been so violent lately” he chuckled. He finally let me go and I was ready to scream at him until he cut me off.

 

“Aww, we're wearing matching outfits” he said. I stared down at what he was wearing and sure enough, he was wearing a black buttoned up shirt with jeans, and black converses.

 

I groaned and then turned back to look at him. “Look, Finn, I will try to say this the nicest way I possibly can. . .I'm sorry, but we can't see each other"

 

“Why not? Your mother apparently loves me” he smiled.

 

“I don't mean her. I meant my brother. He will surely kill you if he sees you near me” I said and put my hands on my hips.

 

“He won't ‘kill me’, stop worrying” he said and casually put his hands inside his jean pockets.

 

“Finn, leave. . .” I commanded.

 

“But where are you going?” he asked.

 

“To this party” I answered, already getting annoyed by him.

 

“Can I take you?” he offered. I laughed and then crossed my arms across my chest. He knitted his eyebrows together, giving me a confused look.

 

“What's so funny?” he asked.

 

“You didn't actually just ask me that, I mean. . .Are you serious? No, no, the question here is: Are you even listening to any word that I'm saying to you?”

 

“No” he said without hesitation, which made me open my mouth and closed it again, not knowing how to answer to that.

 

“I just want to take you, what's so bad about that?”

 

“Dani, is driving me” I replied.

 

“Let me drive you, Gwen. . .I'm not a bad guy. I know maybe my past actions gave you that impression, but I'm not that bad. I want us to get to know each other. I mean, I thought we would get closer. We did have sex”

“And how is it that you didn't call me, huh? If you wanted us to get to know each other, or if making love would bring us 'together', why didn't you call?”

 

“Making love? What are you, five?” he chuckled.

 

I rolled my eyes. "Bye Finn" I waved at him and turned on my heels to leave, but he grabbed my arm, pulling me closer to him, so I bumped with his hard chest. I looked up from him, somehow, his eyes looked darker thanks that there's nearly no lights out here, except for the streetlights. 

 

“You look very beautiful; did you know that?”

 

I widened my eyes as I remembered. . .

 

“I never met such a beautiful girl like you. . .”

 

“You have like a million fans, I supposed you met half of them, and you tell me I'm the most beautiful girl you've ever met? C'mon, be more realistic” I said and rolled my eyes playfully.

 

“I'm serious” he said and moved an inch closer. “What's your name, pretty face?”

 

“Gwen. . .Just Gwen” I said timidly.

 

“Well, Gwen, I'm Finn. . .Just Finn” he said and kissed the top of my hand. I giggled and we locked gazes.

 

I tried to push away from him but he grabbed me tightly by my waist. “Finn, please let me go. . .” my voice cracking. I couldn't cry, not here, not when I'm about to go to a party. He looked at me and we locked gazes. There was a moment of silence and I just wanted to finally get away from him, rush to my room and hide under my covers.

 

“Gwen. . .I can prove to you, that I'm a good person. But you have to give me a chance”

 

“Give me one valid reason why should I be even here with you” I said, our breaths were mixing. I was starting to get lost in those eyes. Those eyes that make every single girl fall to their knees and melt in a puddle.

 

“This baby that's inside of you. . .Is that enough for you?” he said and caressed my cheek delicately. I closed my eyes as he touched me with his warm hand, but opened them right away. “Gwen. . .I just—” he was cut off by a car honk. I quickly pulled away and stared at Dani getting out of her car. She exchanged looks from Finn to me.

 

“Is this asshole bothering you? Just tell me, I have teargas in my purse” she said while walking towards us. She stood beside me and send Finn a deathly glare.

 

“Why do you have teargas in your purse?” I asked.

 

She shrugged. “Just in case I come across with a creep” she said. “It works on jerks too” she said and looked at Finn. He raised his hands up in defeat and smiled innocently.

 

“Dani, first. . .” he started “You scare the living shit out of me. And second, I was just talking to Gwen, and letting her know that she's going with me to this party”

 

Dani laughed, hard. It was so loud I bet the whole neighborhood could hear it. Finn and I stared at her until she finally came to a stop. She took a long breath before turning to Finn.

 

“What is it with both of you laughing at me all the time, huh? I'm starting to get offended already. You guys are mean” he said with a pout in his face. And call me crazy, but he looked kind of adorable, I couldn't help but smiling at his reaction.

 

“Stop it Gwen!” my subconscious scolded at me. I tried to put my thoughts at the back of my head and turned serious.

 

“Is that you're actually very funny, on YouTube and also in real life. Wow” she chuckled. She put her hands on her hips and took a step towards Finn. “You hurt my best friend. You never called my best friend. You took something that wasn't yours, it belonged to my best friend. In other words. . .You're dead for my best friend. Didn't you get it? Do you want me to e-mail it to you?”

 

“I'll tell you the same thing I told your ‘best friend’” he said using quotation marks at the end.

“I'm. Not. A. Bad. Guy” each word deliberately slow.

“Bullshit!” she said.

 

“Well, I was trying to prove it to her until you came. . .”

 

“Saying that you will take her to the party, how do I know you're not trying to kidnap her or something worse, huh?”

 

“I just want to make a truce, okay? I know I fucked up. . .I was the one who slept with her, the one that forgot to use protection and that's why now she's pregnant. And I know that this looks like a fucking mess since I just complicated her life and made it 100x harder. . .But I just need one chance to prove to her that I can be good. If you knew me, the real me. . .You would actually like me”

 

“You won't fool me with that, you—”

 

“Okay” I said cutting Dani off. Both of them looked at me with shocked expressions. They exchanged looks with each other and then their gaze fell on me again.

 

“What?” they asked at the same time.

 

“I will go with you, Finn” I said.

 

Dani chuckled nervously. “You're not serious, are you?”

 

“Yes. I am. . .” I let go a sigh and then crossed my arms across my chest. Dani grabbed my arm and pulled me away from Finn so he wouldn't hear us.

 

“Are you crazy!? We're talking about the guy who used you for some fun and took away your virginity, and the cherry of the cake would be. . .He got you pregnant!” she whispered/shouted.

 

“I'm tired of running away from him, and I don't see evil on those eyes of his. Perhaps he is telling the truth. But we won't know until we give him a chance”

 

“Gwen, are you listening to yourself right now? Please make some sense”

 

“Look, Dani, trust me on this one, yeah? You're my sister, remember? Sisters trust each other, even when they're against it. Please” I said. She let go a frustrated sigh and I knew she meant that as a yes.

 

We walked back to Finn, who was looking around to occupy himself while we talked. He looked at us and then brushed his hair with his long fingers. I shivered as I remember how he touched me, how he caressed every inch of my body, with those slender fingertips.

 

"So?" he asked while crossing his arms across his chest.

 

“Fine. You guys can go together” she spoke bitterly. “BUT. . .” she started, and once again moving closer to him. He was towering over her, but didn't intimidated her. In fact, she wasn't scared at all. She did behave like a sister. But in this relationship, she would be the oldest one. You know, the one that always has that motherly attitude.

 

She pointed with her perfect manicured finger at Finn. “If she tells me that you did something inappropriate, or that you behaved in a certain way that actually bothered her. And I swear I will kill you” she said with a menacing tone.

 

“Actually. . .You'll have to wait in line, because her brother wants to kill me too. But don't worry, I'll make you an appointment” he said smiling. “C'mon, Gwen”

 

I followed him to his car. He opened the passenger's seat and waited patiently as I got in. I stared at him as he got in the driver's seat and started the engine. “Where is the party?” he asked.

 

Once I gave him the address, we drove off my driveway.

Chapter 17 - Another Side of Him

He was talking to me, about anything. . .Our conversation became so random I just didn't understand, but I won't deny it was kind of fun. Literally, we started talking about ourselves, our personality, and then we ended up talking about action movies. . .

 

“That explosion was epic” he said.

 

“It was not. It was as fake as the boobs from this classmate of mine” I said which made him laugh and shake his head. He glanced at me and smiled.

 

“Anyway. . .We actually didn't finish talking about each other. I mean, I don't really understand how me ended up talking about movies and explosions” he chuckled and then cursed under his breath because of the idiots on the road.

 

I giggled. “It’s true. So, you said you have a younger sister?”

 

His eyes instantly light up, adoration was clear on them. I couldn't help the smile that crawled to my lips at his reaction when I mentioned her.

 

“Yeah. She is like the cutest little person ever. She's so beautiful and my little princess”

 

“Aww” that is so adorable. It reminds me when they ask Alec if he has a sister, and he makes it sound like if I'm six because of the way he describes me. For him, I will always be his little sister, even if we're only two years of difference. I'm his little princess.

 

“I know. . .Perhaps one day you can meet her” he mumbled, but I listened clearly.

 

“I would love to” I said and looked out the window. The shining moon above us, the sky was full with beautiful stars. The night was astounding and very quiet. I turned back to Finn, who had his eyes on the road.

“Dani, umm, your best friend. . .She is something” he commented.

 

“Well, you said it, she is my best friend. And she protects me, I mean, she doesn't want me to get hurt” I said and crossed my arms across my chest. He half smiled and looked at me briefly before turning back to the road. “I'm sure you have an overly possessive best friend”

 

“Yeah, actually I do. . . His name is Cameron Philips. That's why I'm not criticizing your friend, because I know what it’s like to have someone that is so close to you that is like a sibling. Is that person that completes you and makes you a whole. It doesn't necessarily have to be your boyfriend or girlfriend. Friends are important too”

 

“Exactly” I agreed, nodding. I caressed my stomach, which I've been doing lately. I don't know why though, is instinct.

 

His gaze fell on my stomach and then cleared his throat. “How are you feeling? You haven't texted me”

 

“You told me to text you if I needed something or if I'm not feeling well. The only thing I do is vomiting” I sighed.

 

“I think we should go to the doctor”

 

“You think? Of course we have to. But then the doctor will talk to my parents, since one little detail. . .I'm under age”

 

“I know. . .But is the right thing to do. You have to tell them”

 

“I know that Finn, Dani told me that already multiple times. But do you think is easy? Have you told your parents?”

 

"Uhh, no"

 

“It seems like is not only hard for me”

 

“Of course you're not the only one affected. My mom will certainly kill me and then dance on top of my grave”

 

“You're exaggerating—” but then started thinking. “No, you're right, they will bury us next to each other and both of our parents will dance on top of our graves” I said which made him laugh.

 

“I'm serious” I scolded.

 

“We have to tell them. Man, and it seems like your mom likes me so much. . .She will hate me after she finds out”

 

We finally reached our destination. I noticed a bunch of people stumbling around, some vomiting in the bushes, cars parked and full of hormonal teenagers doing I don't know what. I seriously don't want to find out.

 

I exchanged looks with Finn and then back to the huge house in front of us. Finn parked his car and then got out. I didn't go out of the car yet, I was still admiring the huge mansion right in front of my eyes. Finn opened my door and offered me his hand. I took it and he helped me get out.

 

We walked to the front door and Nash opened it, but I grabbed his hand. “You can't just go in like if it’s your house” I said with a scowl on my face.

 

He shrugged. “C'mon, Gwen. The door is open for a reason. Let's go” he said and grabbed my hand leading me inside the house. It seems like most of the people were scattered around, because there was almost no one in the living room. Just some random people which faces I never seen, were just hanging around a mini bar.

 

Suddenly, Austin appeared, a red cup in his hand. He grinned at me and then took long strides to where I was. With his free hand, he pulled me closer to him, hugging me. When he pulled away, he took a sip from his cup.

 

“Gwen, I'm glad you could make it. . .” he said.

 

“Thanks for inviting me” I smiled politely. Then his gaze fell on Nash and his jaw literally almost dropped to the ground.

 

“Finn!? Finn freaking Grier!?” he asked exasperated. Finn chuckled and nodded knowingly, he brought his index fingers to his lips so Austin could be quiet. Of course, already used to this type of reactions.

 

“That's right. . .And you are—” he trailed off.

 

“Austin, Austin Brody. Very nice to meet you, I love your music. You inspired me to play guitar in the first place” he said.

 

“Well, thank you very much” he said and scratched the back of his head, a smugly smile plastered across his face. I fight so hard not to scoff at his reaction to the situation. Of course he will feel all cocky about it.

 

“OH. MY. GOD. IS FINN HARRIES!” I heard a girl followed by multiple screams. I turned to Finn and he quickly grabbed my hand. We started running upstairs and into the nearest room. He quickly locked the door and breathed heavily. The girls all kept screaming and knocked on all the doors, trying to find him.

 

I turned to Finn. “Is it always like this?” I asked.

 

He nodded quickly and gulped. “Yeah, you have no idea. . .”

 

“And what do you propose we do, huh? For how long do we have to stay hidden here?” I asked while putting my hands on my hips. He shook his head and then walked towards me, when the door was trying to get opened, and started to get knocked at. I nearly screamed because of the sudden sound, but Finn quickly covered my mouth so they wouldn't hear us.

 

“Shh” he said.

 

“Finn! I know you're in there. I saw you going inside with that whore!” I heard someone, Finn slowly uncovered my mouth and I looked at him.

 

“Whore?” I mouthed at him, pretty offended by their remark. He shrugged and then we stared at the door, multiple people hitting on it. 

 

“What are we going to do?” I whispered at him. He stared at the window and then back at me.

 

“No” I quickly said, but he was already walking towards it. “I have a plan” he said while turning to face me.

“And that would be?”

 

“We have to make them leave, or distract them, or something. We have to go downstairs” he grinned while staring at me. The lights were turned off, and the only way I can look at him is because of the window at the far end of the room.

 

“And can you tell me how you will get down without getting killed by those crazy fans that usually call whore to whoever you're with? Please, enlighten me” I said and crossed my arms across my chest.

 

“First, let me do something” he said and opened the window, then he got out for a brief second.

“There is a trampoline” he informed.

 

“What does that mean?” I asked afraid of the answer.

 

“We can jump down, Gwen” he said, with an excited expression. His eyes light up when he proposed the idea.

 

He can't be serious.

 

“Are you out of your mind!?” I whispered/shouted. “You are so crazy if you actually think that I will jump from a second floor to a trampoline. What you are proposing is practically suicide”

 

“Fine! Fine, Jesus” he raised his hands up in surrender. “I have another idea then” he grabbed my hand and we went to the door. The girls were still screaming outside. “Follow my lead” he mouthed and I nodded. Finn started talking louder which made them shut up.

 

“You know, I would love to meet all the girls outside, but they're too many and there's no space here” he said loudly so they can hear. They were shushing each other so they can hear their idol.

 

“So, what do you want to do, Finn?” I replied following his game.

 

“I think I will be doing a special and free meet and greet, but not here. We need a lot of space, and there's not any” that's when the girls started screaming.

 

“So!” Finn said loudly so they can shut up, which they did. “I will go with my car, and if you girls” he said now talking to them, still with the door closed of course. “Want to come and meet me and give me a big hug, follow my car” he said and quickly ran to the window. He motioned for me to go outside. I quickly shook my head.

 

“You're crazy!” I said.

 

“I know that. . .I just need you to tell them to follow my car” the group of girls were now outside, staring up at me.

 

“But you won't be leaving with your car you idiot, you are here!” but he didn't listened to my complains, he just motioned for me to go outside. I rolled my eyes and opened the window, careful not to slip.

 

“Where is Finn you bitch!? I saw him going to that room with you!” a blonde girl, who could totally be a waitress at hooters, said while sending me a deathly glare.

 

“He-he couldn't go outside the door since you girls would most likely tackle him or take away his clothes. So he got out by the window. His car is that one” I pointed to a car already leaving the lot. Thank God someone else is leaving. The girls seemed to buy it because they ran screaming to their own cars and quickly drove away, following the random car. I got inside the room again and breathed heavily.

 

“That was crazy, Finn Tyler Harries” I said. He laughed and then nudged at my shoulder.

 

“Now, let's get out of here” I said but he quickly grabbed my arm, which made me stay in my place. He smirked and then turned his attention back to the window, then back at me.

 

“What?” I asked furrowing my eyebrows in confusion.

 

“Remember I told you there is a trampoline outside?” he asked. It took me a moment to realize it, but when it hit me, I widened my eyes and tried to run to the door, but he grabbed me by my waist and forcefully made me go to the window again.

 

“Finn! Let me go! Please. I don't want to do it!” I screamed and tried to get away from his grip, but he was stronger than me.

 

“C'mon it will be fun!” he laughed.

 

“No, we already got rid of them could we use the stairs like normal people?”

 

He shook his head. “Nope”

 

We both got outside the window and into the roof. It was a second floor and it was already hard getting outside to distract those girls, but jumping off of it? That's insane.

 

“You go first” he said.

 

“No, your idea, you go first”

 

“Yes, but if I go first, you can escape downstairs” he said with a pout on his face, and he got a good point. I would do that. . .

 

I let go a sigh. “Fine. But if I die, it will be your fault” I said and took a step towards the edge.

 

“You're not going to die, I do this all the time in my house in North Carolina. Is super fun” he said cheerily. “You jump; I jump. . .Remember?” he said using his best impersonation of Jack from Titanic.

 

“Really Finn? Titanic?” I asked, trying to hide my guffaws. I should be angry at him; he's forcing me to jump.

“I thought girls like that kind of stuff” he shrugged. “If I didn't kill myself jumping from my roof at my house, then I promise you won't kill yourself”

 

I gulped the lump in my throat. “O-okay. . .But what if I hurt this baby?”

 

“It is still a fetus, Gwen” he said annoyed, brushing his hair back again.

 

“It clearly seems you don't understand about women, Finn. . .Anything can happen to this baby, fetus or not”

“Just jump Gwen. That's your problem, you always overthink things, don't think, just do it. . .”

 

“You don't know me enough to actually think that”

 

“I think I know you enough, Gwen” he said and crossed his arms across his chest. He grinned and took a step towards me. “You know. . .You don't have to jump if you don't want to” he said using a flirty voice.

 

“W-what?”

 

“Is okay, there are other things we can do. . .” he said and pulled me closer to him until I was touching his chest. He pierced his majestic eyes with mine, they were almost hypnotizing

.

“Huh?— ”

 

“Shh. . .Don't talk” he said and caressed my cheek. He closed his eyes and started to lean in, instinctively, I closed my eyes and was about to connect our lips, but reality hit me. I abruptly opened my eyes and quickly pulled away from him.

 

“Fine, fine, fine. . .I'll jump” I said and stepped on the edge. I heard him chuckle, I tilted my head sideways and saw him waiting patiently.

 

I let go a sigh. “I hate you, Harries” I said and jumped. It all seemed like it was in slow motion, I tried my best not to fall on my stomach, just in case. I screamed so loud, I bet that if the music wasn't so loud and people were not that drunk, they should've come and checked it out. But not because they wanted to know if someone was hurt or not, it would be because they're very nosy and curious, they just want something to gossip around since they don't have a life.

 

I ended up landing on my back, making a huge bounce. I heard Finn laughing his ass off, so I looked up at him, glaring at him. My bun was all messed up so I just let it go loose.

 

“I recommend you to move because I don't want to hurt you” he said. I quickly got off the trampoline and waited for him to jump.

 

He walked to the edge and then prepared himself. Everything happened so fast, and I saw him land, doing a major bounce, bigger than mine, he started laughing while still lying on the trampoline. I went and sat beside him. 

 

“You have no idea how much I missed that. . .” he said and pinched my cheek.

 

“You're crazy, you know that?” I giggled.

 

“Yeah, I do. . .But I'm glad you trusted me, that's all I wanted”

 

“What?” I asked furrowing my eyebrows in confusion. He sat up straight and stared at me straight in the eyes.

 

“I promised that you wouldn't get hurt, that you should stop overthinking things. And you did. You trusted me enough to jump from a second floor into a trampoline that could easily make you bounce so high you can land on the ground and break your neck. But you trusted me and jumped” he said and grabbed my chin, caressing it. “You see? I did this for you to know that you can trust me with anything, and I will be there for you. . .All the time. I wouldn't tell you to jump from a second floor if I knew that that could've actually hurt you. I want you to see that I'm a good person. . .That I want to protect you”

 

“Finn, I—” I couldn't finish that sentence as he crashed his lips with mine. I was taken aback by his sudden move, but soon, without thinking, I started kissing back. I put my arms around his neck to be closer to him. He moved his hand from my cheek and then grabbed me tightly by my waist. It felt so nice to kiss him like this, I couldn't think of anything or anyone other than us, other than this moment. Our lips moved in sync and suddenly felt such relief and pleasure with this kiss, with this tender and very special moment.

 

He started delicately making me lie on my back, not once breaking the kiss. It felt amazing, his lips were so soft. But then something else crossed my mind. Not only I was feeling pleasure, there was also a stinging in my stomach that made me think how wrong this is. How I should pull away, how I should stop. Yup, that was my conscious talking.

 

“Okay then. . .I trust you little booger. You're my sister, my only sister. . .And I don't want you to get hurt” Alec's words replaying on my head like a scratched CD. But this just felt so good to stop. I tried to put those thoughts to the back of my head for just a moment.

 

Finn started touching my thighs, and I let out a soft moan, he did the same. I touched his chest and then moved my hands to his head, playing with his hair. We pulled away for just a second and he stared at me with those eyes of his.

 

“I can't help getting lost in your eyes, Gwen. . .” he commented giving me a peck on the lips. He started placing wet kisses on my neck. Then he got back to my face and kissed my nose, then my forehead, then went back to my lips. I kept tugging at his hair, wanting him even closer, if that was even possible.

 

I just wanted to kiss him. . .To be close to him. It feels so warm as he was hovering on top of me. He had actually achieved something: I felt protected with him.

 

Chapter 18 - What a Night

I don't how long have we been in that same position, how long have we been kissing? It felt eternal. . .There comes that stinging again. I had to stop it. . . “Finn, wait, stop” I said between the kisses, but he didn't listen as he just kept kissing me. I moaned into the kiss and felt him smile. I opened my eyes slightly, no, this is wrong. . .

 

“Finn!” I said and turned my head sideways so he can stop. He knitted his eyebrows together and sat up straight. I did too and then got off the trampoline, I need to get away from him.

 

“Gwen, wait!” he called after me, I heard his footsteps chasing me, that made me run even faster. Suddenly, I felt his strong arms being wrapped around my waist, making me motionless. He turned me around and soon we were locking gazes.

 

“I'm sorry. . .It won't happen again, I just—” he trailed off. "I just did it in the moment, it won't happen again"

 

“Finn, maybe you should leave” I said looking down. He brought my chin up so I can face him again.

 

“I'm sorry” he apologized and then took a strand of my hair and placed it behind my ear. “I know I shouldn't have done that, but I couldn't help it. Didn't you enjoyed it?” he asked. I didn't answer, I was scared that I would be back to kissing him again. I don't want that, wait. . .Do I? God, no, I don't. . .I can't kiss him.

 

“I just. . .We can't kiss like that” I said.

 

“You didn't answer my question” he said and our breaths were mixing. Why do his lips need to look so plump and inviting? He bit his lower lip, while dropping his view from my eyes to my lips. I tried to push him away, but he didn't budge. He knew that if I don't pull back I will most likely go back and to do it again, and that's what he wants. But I won't fall, I just can't do this with him. . .Is so wrong.

 

“Yes, I enjoyed it. . .But that doesn't matter. You need to go” I said.

 

“Because you want to kiss me again” he stated as his face started to get closer to mine. But I finally pushed him away, earning some space.

 

“What?” I asked.

 

“If you're any near me, you will lose control and kiss me. . .Don't worry, I want you to lose control, I want to kiss you again” he said and tried to take a step towards me, but I raised my hands to stop him from coming any further.

 

“Look, Finn, I don't know what is going through your head right now. . .But we can't do this, not now, not ever”

 

“Gwen—”

 

“Leave, you know it's the best thing right now to do. . .” I said with folded arms.

 

He let go a heavy sigh. “Fine, I'll leave. But this isn't over. . .” he said and walked towards me, this time I didn't stopped him. He leaned over to my ear and a shiver run through my spine.

 

“But I'll tell you something. . .I don't regret that kiss” he said and gave me a peck on my lips, my eyes widened. He smirked and then turned on his heels to leave. I just stayed there, motionless, speechless, with every emotion that you could possibly imagine. That's what he did to me. He made me be even more confused. I saw him getting inside his car, but not before glancing at me. He shook his head and then got in. He drove away and disappeared, and yet I was still there.

 

Why did he kiss me? Why did I enjoy it? Why do I miss him? What is happening to me?

 

He makes me feel something different, not the same way when we first met, that feeling was different. I believe it was because of the alcohol in my system, I felt lust and seek for a passionable night. I don't think the Nash that talked to me in that bar, is the same Nash that kissed me now. We had kissed once, but it wasn't like tonight. Still, I shouldn't have allowed that happening, but it did happen.

 

And you know what is the worst part?

 

I don't regret that kiss either. . .

 

• • •

 

After what seemed like forever, I finally found my strength and started walking inside the house again. I saw Austin sitting on the couch, talking to some friends. His gaze instantly fell on mine and quickly walked towards me.

 

“Where were you? And where's Finn?” he asked.

 

“He had to leave. . .” I said.

 

“Oh” he simply replied and scratched the back of his head. “Hey, want a drink?” he offered. I remembered reading in the Pregnancy Book that when you're pregnant, you shouldn't be drinking alcohol, I think it said that it could hurt the baby. I have to re-check that Chapter again. I quickly shook my head and offered a polite smile.

“Gwen! Thank God you're alright. I've been looking all over the whole damn house for you. Where the hell were you!?” Dani asked exasperated while checking me in case I had any wounds. I chuckled at her actions and then grabbed both of her hands to avoid any more checkups.

 

“I'm fine, really. . .” I assured her.

 

"Where's that jerk?" she asked while crossing her arms across her chest. I grabbed her arm to pull her away so Austin can't hear.

 

“I have so much to tell you. . .” I said. I started telling her everything, since we got here, to the kiss. She gasped every once in a while, covering her mouth with both of her hands. I don't blame her though; I would be surprised too.

 

“So he didn't hurt you in any way?” she asked.

 

“No, but still we shouldn't had kissed”

 

“Who kissed first?”

 

“He did. . .” I sighed. Austin appeared in beside me and offered a drink to Dani, which she quickly accepted. I gave her a look and she shrugged.

 

“What? I will need some” she smiled innocently.

 

Austin chuckled and then looked at me. “Are you sure you don't want?”

 

I shook my head. “I'm sure. . .”

 

The night went on and on, and I couldn't stop thinking about Finn. How our lips seemed like they were made for each other, how he wanted to feel me close, how he liked caressing me. He felt so warm against my body.

 

I found myself sitting by myself on the couch while staring at nothing in particular, sipping on my water.

 

“Why so lonely?” someone said while sitting next to me, very close.

 

“Huh?” I tilt my head towards this guy. He had rosy cheeks and deep brown eyes. His hair was black and messy. He was wearing a white buttoned up shirt and loose jeans. He had a grin across his strong features, holding a red cup.

 

“I mean, a pretty girl like you shouldn't be alone” he said as he started getting even closer to me.

 

“I just. . .Um, I'm just waiting for my friend” I said. He put his free hand around my shoulder.

 

“It’s okay, I'll take care of you” he said and moved his hand to my thigh. I quickly tried to move but he held me in place me.

 

“Quit it, man. She's not interested” Austin said, and I sighed in relief. I stood up and went beside him. This creepy guy huffed annoyed and left. I turned to Austin who smiled sweetly at me. “Sorry, he was drunk as fuck” he said. I nodded and then took a sip from my water cup. I scanned my surroundings and searched for Dani, I spotted her talking to a guy.

 

She instantly saw me and then walked towards my direction. “What?” she asked innocently.

 

“Oh nothing, just that you left me there waiting alone. . .And you were just talking to a guy” I scoffed.

 

“Sorry. . .I had to, you know” she said.

 

“Anyway, I don't feel very well, can we go?” I asked. She nodded and I told her to wait in the car. She walked away and disappeared among the crowd. I turned to Austin, he was standing there casually, grinning at me.

 

“Thanks for inviting us, it was. . .Fun” I said.

 

“It’s okay, thanks for coming. I guess I will see you at school” he said and grabbed me by my waist pulling me close to him. I was taken aback by his sudden show of affection since I barely know him. But he seems like a nice guy and I think we can be friends, I guess. . .

 

I then realized he had hugged me for a long time. I tried to get away from his grip but he didn't budge.

 

“Umm, Austin?”

 

“Mm?" he mumbled, swaying me from side to side.

 

“You can let me go now” I chuckled. He quickly pulled away and scratched the back of his head.

 

“S-sorry. I'm-I'm a hugger!” he said nervously.

 

I giggled and put a strand of hair behind my ear. “It’s okay, really. I actually needed a hug" I said and hugged him briefly. He smiled and bit his lip, he looked kinda cute. “What? You want another, huh?” I asked jokingly.

 

“Actually, yes, it’s the least you can do after coming to my party” he said while casually putting his hands on his jean pockets.

 

I laughed and shook my head. “But you invited—” I was cut off by him hugging me tightly again. I put my arms around his neck. I don't even know why I'm hugging him like this. I mean. . .I don't know him. But I do know one thing though. . .He does give nice hugs.

 

I pulled away. “I'll see you in school on Monday”

 

He nodded. “Of course. Yeah. Umm. . .Have a safe night”

 

“Thanks, you too” I simply replied. While I was walking away, I turned around, he was still staring at me. But when I stared at him, he quickly looked away. I shrugged it off and then went to the car with Dani.

 

• • •

 

“So what is going to happen with Finn?” Dani asked when she parked at my driveway. I sighed and stared at the window briefly before turning my head sideways to face her.

 

“I seriously don't know. . .”

 

“What did you feel when you kissed him?” she asked.

 

“That's what scared me. . .How I felt about it in that precise moment. I felt fireworks, and-and butterflies in my stomach. . .It was so scary. And even though I wanted to pull away so badly, I couldn't. . .”

 

“Wow. Just. . .Wow” she said. “And what did he say?”

 

“He said that he doesn't regret it. . .”

 

“And do you regret it?”

 

“I—” I was cut off by a tap on my window. I jumped slightly, so did Dani. It was Alec, crossing his arms across his chest.

 

I got off the car. “I'll call you tomorrow” I said and she nodded. She started driving off the driveway and I turned to my big brother.

 

“Is kinda late don't you think?”

 

“I know, I know” I stared at the ground and then back at him. “Sorry”

 

“You didn't drink. . .Right?” he asked seriously.

 

I shook my head. “No, of course not. . .” I replied and he sighed in relief. “You think I would drink?”

 

“No, no, no. . .It was just to make sure” he said quickly and hugged me, but I just kept looking at him. He walked towards the house and I followed close behind him.

 

“You don't think I can be bad, huh? Well. . .I can” I said and went to the fridge. I grabbed a juice carton and showed it to him.

 

“What you will do with that?” he asked.

 

“I. Will. Drink. It. But wait! I won't use a glass for it” I said.

 

“Wow. What a badass” he said sarcastically.

 

I opened the carton and drank a sip. But somehow I couldn't swallow it, something in me wasn't allowing it.

 

“Aren't you going to swallow it?” he asked, an amuse grin plastered across his face. I shook my head quickly. “You will spit it out” he stated, nodding his head. I rolled my eyes but quickly nod my head again. I spit it out in the sink. I grabbed a glass and poured myself some juice. I saw Alec trying to hold his laughter, but obviously failed.

 

“Oh shut up” I said and took a sip. Well, that was embarrassing. . .

 

“It’s okay, G. I love that you're not a badass. You're still my little angel. And I was just making sure you didn't drink, sometimes Dani can make you be more, you know. . .Fearless” he said and kissed the top of my head. He turned on his heels to go and went upstairs. I just stayed there for a couple of minutes before walking to my room too. I was exhausted, I just passed out without taking my make-up off, not even my clothes.

 

With everything that had happened tonight, with Finn. . .I couldn't hold myself any longer. I just want to close my eyes and forget that any of this ever happened. But I can't, is unforgettable. . .

 

He kissed me, I kissed him back. . .

 

It happened, and it was so wrong. . .But at the same time felt so right.

 

God, I just want to stop thinking about it.

Chapter 19 - Mama Knows Best

Finn's P.O.V

 

I'm stupid, so freaking stupid. But what was I supposed to do, huh? She was so close to me, her lips looked so soft and sweet, and I just wanted to bring those lips and connect them with mine. And when I kissed her, that was it for me. . .I couldn't get enough of her.

 

And now I blew it. . .But I'm not giving up. It doesn't matter what she says, I promised to protect her and to be there while she's going through this pregnancy. Plus, this is my fault, thanks to my irresponsibility, she needs to be suffering this baby topic. If it wasn't for me, right now she would be happy and without any preoccupations. And we wouldn't have met. . .

 

I was driving down the road and into the Hotel I'm staying in. I can't wait till we move to our new apartment here in L.A. It’s going to be sick. Once I got there, I parked my car and then walked to the lobby; it was so desolated since its very late. I went to my room and took off my clothes, then lied on my bed. I grabbed my phone and started typing a quick text to her. 

 

“I'm truly sorry for kissing you like that. I know it was wrong, but don't hate me, please don't ignore me. . .”

 

I glanced at Cameron, who was fast asleep. I smiled and covered myself with my sheets, dreaming with those sweet lips I couldn't get enough of.

 

• • •

 

The next morning, I woke up by a loud noise. I groaned and put my pillow to my face. What is that obnoxious sound? I put the pillow beside me and stared at Cameron twerking to a new Miley Cyrus song. I sat up straight and rubbed at my eyes.

 

“Why can't my roommate never be Jack? He always sleeps until noon. But no, I have to be with noisy Cam, who wakes up very early” I said mostly to myself.

 

Cameron turned to me. “C'mon dude, is a beautiful day!” he exclaimed and then started jumping on my bed.

“You know. . .Some of us want to sleep, Cam” I said and threw a pillow at him. He glared at me, then came to a stop. He sat down next to me as I brush with my fingers at my now messy hair.

 

“Sorry, I just feel happy. . .Why aren't you?” he asked.

 

“Is morning, I'm not in my best mood at this time of day” I replied.

 

“I think something happened last night. . .With Gwen perhaps” he said and stared at me straight in my eyes. I couldn't lie to him, he had something in those eyes that make you tell him the truth.

 

I let go a heavy sigh, and nodded. “Yes, but—”

 

“But nothing, Harries, you're not escaping this one. You're going to tell me everything like it or not. . .” he said.

 

“I kissed her, alright!? I fucking kissed her” I said and got out of bed. I started pacing back and forth cursing under my breath. Cameron looked at me with a shocked expression, opening his mouth and then closing it again.

 

“I know; I know. . .I shouldn't have done that. You don't have to tell me” I said.

 

“I'm just, you know. . .Very shocked. I can't believe you actually kissed her” he said and stood up also. I walked towards a corner of the room and picked up a shirt. I sniffed on it to check. Smells clean to me. . .I put some deodorant and then put on that shirt with some sweatpants.

 

“Really Finn? It was on the floor” Cameron said. I turned my attention towards him and crossed my arms across my chest.

 

“Look, Cam. . .It’s been a very tiring night. And I seriously don't care” I said. He raised his hands up in defeat.

 

“Thank you” I mumbled and then grabbed a water from the mini fridge. My throat was so dry. I took a sip and instantly felt better, I walked towards my bed and sat in the edge. “What should I do?”

 

“Why are you asking me?” he asked while lowering the volume of his iPod. “You fucked it up, you fix it”

“Umm, hello. . .You're supposed to be the encouraging and wise best friend” I said. He rolled his eyes and then sat next to me, he patted my knee and smiled.

 

“The only thing I can tell you, is that you should apologize. Go and talk to her”

 

“I tried to apologize the moment I kissed her, she wouldn't listen” I sighed and then put my messy hair back.

 

“Of course she wasn't going to listen to you then, but what about now?. . .She might be calmed right now” he said and patted my back. I let go a heavy sigh, I want to talk to her so badly. I know I shouldn't have done that. But just as I said to her, I don't regret it. That was the most amazing kiss I have ever experienced. It was delicate, then became rough, it was with so much need and passion, I just couldn't get enough of it. And I believe she felt the same way.

 

“You're right. . .I'm going to go and talk to her” I said. Cameron smiled and nodded, he stood up and put on deodorant. "You can go back and twerk"

 

“Nah, I'm good. My booty's tired” he said which made me laugh.

 

“Really!? That never happened before”

 

“I know right, girl!?” he said jokingly which made chuckle. I shook my head in amusement as I stared at my best friend, placing the camera in the center of the room, probably about to record a new video.

 

I got out of the room with my mind made up.

 

I have to talk to her. . .

 

 Gwen's P.O.V

 

I opened one eye lazily, the sun shining on my face, I groaned. It’s too early to wake up. I closed my eyes again, but my alarm started sounding. As I extended my hand to turn it off, I fell of the bed.

 

“Great” I mumbled annoyed.

 

There's no way I'm sleeping now. I grabbed my phone from the nightstand and checked my messages. A text from Nash popped up. 

 

“I'm truly sorry for kissing you like that. I know it was wrong, but don't hate me, please don't ignore me. . .”

 

I shook my head. What we did last night was a mistake. I'm not angry with him, I'm angry with myself for letting that happen. But I won't deny it was one of the best kisses I have ever experienced.

 

I went to the bathroom and washed my face. I put my messy hair in a high ponytail, I just put on some sweatpants and a grey loose shirt, then walked downstairs. I went to the fridge to check what I could eat. I grabbed the chocolate milk carton and then turned around. My mom was sitting there, sipping on her coffee mug.

 

“Morning, mom” I said and poured myself some milk in a cup. She didn't answer, and her expression was blank. She briefly glanced at me but then her view dropped down to the table.

 

“Mom? A-Are you okay?” I asked while taking a few steps towards her. She placed her coffee mug down and finally looked at me.

 

“No, I'm not okay. Want to know why?” she asked. I nodded, furrowing my eyebrows in confusion.

 

“Because I have a daughter that lied. . .That lied to me for I don't know how long” she said. I widened my eyes and froze right there in my spot. “When were you going to tell me that you're pregnant!?”

 

“Mom—”

 

“Why, Gwen? Why?” she cut me off. “If you had such a problem like this one, why didn't you tell me?” she asked, hurt and concern plastered across her delicate face. Some tears run down my cheeks. I can't believe this. I didn't want her to find this way. But, it is my fault, I made this conversation wait for too long.

 

“How did you find out?” I asked.

 

“I found this in your closet” she said while putting on top of the table my pregnancy book “And this in the trash can” she continued, placing the positive pregnancy. I covered my mouth with both of my hands. “Plus, your appetite is changing, your stomach is growing. . .It wasn't that hard to figure it out. I'm your mom, honey. . .I know everything. I just found it very hard to believe that my 17-year-old daughter is pregnant”

 

“I swear. . .I swear I was going to tell you. This-this wasn't the way you were supposed to find out" I crocked. "Does dad knows?”

 

She nodded as she crossed her arms across her chest. “He couldn't be here since he's in a business trip” she said, with a sigh. “Gwen, you need to tell me everything. . .”

 

I sat at the chair across from her and told her all the events that happened. I should've have done that a long time ago. I just didn't know how, and then Nash happened and I truly forgot that sooner or later. . .I had to be straightforward with my parents and tell them that their daughter is pregnant.

 

“Who's the father?” she asked.

 

I fidgeted with my fingers as I looked down at the table. "Please don't tell me that that handsome brown-eyed boy is the father”

 

I nodded slowly and finally met her gaze. “I met him in this bar. . .I just. . .I just didn't know it was going to lead to this”

 

“Of course you didn't know. You were just a teenager looking for fun, you're not the first teenager that experiences with sex. But you should've been more careful and actually use protection. I thought we had this discussion a long time ago" she said crossing her arms across her chest. "What do you plan to do?”

 

“I don't know. Believe me, that's the question that doesn't stop running through my head”

 

“Who else knows about this?” she asked.

 

I sighed. "Finn, Dani, and Alec"

 

“Y-your brother knew about this?” she gasped shocked.

 

“Yes. . .” I said almost in a whisper. I heard footsteps, so I tilt my head sideways to find Alec standing there, furrowing his eyebrows in confusion. His gaze fell on the pregnancy book and the pregnancy test. I honestly don't know why I didn't throw that test away from the very beginning.

 

“Holy crap” he muttered. He shook his head and waved his hands. "Look, mom I can explain"

 

“Oh, you can explain to me why my 17-year-old daughter is pregnant and you being the older brother, not once commented me about this?. . .Your own mother by the way”

 

“Okay, I can't explain. I just. . .I just waited to tell you about this with Gwen. I didn't want her to just go and tell you by herself. This is a big deal, mom”

 

“Of course it is, sweetie. . .” she turned to me. “You should've told me”

 

“I know, I know mom. I'm so sorry” I said as I kept crying, this is what I wanted to avoid. . .The crying. I can't believe my life turned out to be this way. I never thought that I would be right now talking to my mother that I'm pregnant. This is not how I pictured my life to be. I just wanted to graduate High School, have my diploma, go to College, then perhaps a Master Degree. . .But never this.

 

“Have you seen a doctor?” she asked.

 

I nodded. “I was feeling hard cramps; so-so Finn went with me”

 

“Don't even mention me that asshole, he's the one responsible for this” said Alec trying not to raise his voice, obviously failing.

 

Suddenly, I heard the doorbell ring. I wiped my eyes and then walked towards the door. I don't want anyone to see me like this. But anything is better than sitting there, arms crossed, facing my mother.

 

When I opened the door, my mouth parted. Not this. . .

 

“F-Finn” I said.

 

“Gwen, babe, are you okay? What happened? I told you to call me if anything—” he trailed off while seeing my mom and Alec. “Oh” his gaze fell on me.

 

“I think you should leave, right now is not a good time” I said, but my mom was already at the door.

 

“No, Gwen, let him in. . .I have some questions for the father of the baby that's inside my daughter”

 

“I-I just. . .Umm” he scratched the back of his head nervously and then looked at me. "I'm sorry" he said now looking at my mother.

 

“Please come in, Finn” my mom said while moving out of the way so Finn could come in.

Chapter 20 - Tension filled the Air

Tension.

 

Tension was filling the room for sure. Finn and I slowly followed my mom towards the kitchen. My brother was in one corner, staring at us, arms crossed. My mom, with a stern expression, told us to sit down, which we obliged, no comments. Oh, my God I wanted to crawl back to under my sheets and never come out. I glanced at Nash multiple times, he looked nervous and anxiousness was clear in his face. Honestly, I was in the same state.

My mom stared at us for a couple minutes, tapping her red nails against the wooden table, until she finally spoke up, with a cold voice of course. “Did your mother ever teach you about using protection, boy?” was the first thing she asked.

 

He gulped the lump in his throat and nodded almost robotically. “Yes, ma'am” he said. But she shook her head, and chuckled.

 

“It doesn't look like it, now does it?” she said, I don't like it when she uses that tone. She sent a little glare at Finn's direction, which made him even more nervous. “Do you have any idea what have you done?” she asked.

“Mom” I called out for her. She looked at me, “We know the consequences”

 

“I bet this young boy doesn't, just look at him, all confident. He will never understand that he's practically ruining your life with this” she said, now folding her arms. I glanced at Alec, he was staring anywhere else but in our direction.

 

“Mom, this is not only Finn's fault. It's mine too” I said.

 

“You were drunk! You weren't thinking straight, and–and he took advantage of you! Don't defend him, Gwen. Please, you're being too naïve”

 

“He was drunk too, mother! We were both not capable of possibly knowing what was happening. I won't let you blame him for this, because I have just as much fault as him”

 

“Gwen—”

 

“We know, there are consequences with this, but pointing fingers and fighting over what is already done, won't solve anything” I said, calming a little. Screaming and arguing won't do any good, it will just keep adding more fuel to the fire. 

 

She let go a heavy sigh, and rubbed her hands on her face. “You should've told me before what was happening” she said. I nodded at her response, biting my lower lip.

 

“I know, and I'm sorry”

 

A couple minutes passed by, not knowing what to say. I glanced at Finn, who was fidgeting with his fingers. My mom was staring blankly at somewhere else, lost in thought. Not even Alec spoke, he was just sighing, shaking his head, not once looking at us.

 

“This can cause so much damage to your future” my mom stayed, but it looked like she was just talking to herself. I stayed in silence, bringing my attention back to her. She stared at Nash, a mini glare was plastered on her face. “I don't want you to ever hang out with my daughter, you hear that?” Finn snapped his head up and had a shocked expression.

 

“Excuse me?” he choked out.

 

“You heard me, young boy, I don't care how much Gwen defends you, it clearly seems like you're a bad influence. I want you out of my daughter's life. . .Now get out” she said through gritted teeth. Finn looked at me, ignoring my mom's words.

 

“Gwen, say something” he pleaded, and his voice made my heart ache. I stayed quiet though, it's a better choice when there's such tension. I glanced at him, but I couldn't hold that gaze for longer, it pained me to see him plead like that.

 

My mom let go a heavy sigh, which made Finn and I bring our attention back to her. “I know that kids these days are curious and want to experiment. Believe me, I was a teenager too. But, it's not right that you put my daughter through this. This is for the best. . .I'm trying to protect her” I fidgeted with my fingers. I know my mother's intentions are good, and of course, this is her daughter that is pregnant. But, Finn is not bad. Forbidding me of seeing him isn't going to do any good, especially since I'm having his baby too.

 

“So do I” said Finn.

 

“I think is better if you leave” she said standing up. Finn did too, locking gazes with my mom. She put her hands on her hips, and his expression was pleading and almost sad. I know he was trying to be strong and not snap at her. I know Finn would do that for sure, but judging by the situation, arguing with her isn't going to be any good.

 

“But—”

 

“Finn” I called cut him off. Shock and pain was plastered across his features, and I wanted nothing more but to hug him tightly.

 

He let go a heavy sigh and then stood up from the chair, walking directly to the front door. I was sitting there, motionless, watching the father of my baby walk away. I didn't want him to go, but I know things will get even more complicated if he stays. It's better if we take some time apart. He turned around and glanced at my mom, then locked gazes with me.

 

I mouthed 'sorry', to which he nodded slowly. The look on his face made my stomach be on a tight knot, my heart cracking. The sadness plastered across his creamy and baby–like face, makes it even harder to stay calmed. It made me have this huge urge to run over to him and hug him, to let him know that I have just as much fault as him. At the end of the day, we were both drunk, didn't know better. I bet he just wanted some fun for the night, I wanted to prove that I could be free and not such a goody-goody two shoes. I am pregnant, but is my fault too. . .

 

When he left, my mom turned to me, her face softened up a bit. “I know you will think that this isn’t fair right now, that you feel like you have anything to do with this. . .But, you know I'm doing this because I think is the best for you. Please, understand. . .”

 

“I–I do understand, mom” I said, taking a deep breath. “I just don't want you to believe that Finn is the only responsible in this situation. I was just as drunk and didn't know what I was thinking. I was the one to lie to you about being pregnant, I should've told you sooner, and I'm sorry"

 

She rushed over me and gave me a tight hug, pressing a soft kiss on my forehead. “Let's go for an ice cream cone” she suggested. I nodded eagerly, knowing that perhaps we can forget about this for a brief moment. I need to clear my mind a little bit, and a refreshing ice cream cone will do.

 

Alec denied when we offered to take him with us, he said it was better if he stays, claiming he has homework, but by the look on his face, I know he wanted me to spend some quality time with my mom, which I found very caring of him.

 

We got inside the car and she started the engine, glancing at me with a sweet smile across her face. She grabbed my hand and caressed it for a moment with her thumb. “I love you, do you know that?”

 

“Yes, mom, I know. . .I love you too” I said.

 

Finn's P.O.V

 

I've never had such feeling in my life. I felt like I was being torn down little by little by every word that woman said. Of course I'm an idiot for leaving her daughter pregnant. Yeah. . .I was drunk when I should've been more responsible and careful. I know, I know, I know.

 

But, not allowing me to see Gwen, the mother of my kid. That is my kid too. I got inside my car and started the engine, quickly driving away from that house. I sighed in relief when I spotted my apartment, I just want to go to my bed and never come out. But, at the same time, I want to see Gwen. I want to hug her, to kiss her once more. . .Those lips. Those lips that drive me crazy the second they touched my mine. God, I desperately need her to kiss me again.

 

I opened the main door just to reveal Cameron sitting on one of the couches, with someone beside him, who? You may ask. . .With my mother.

 

“Mom, what are you doing here?” I asked bewildered. My mom smiled sweetly at me while walking towards my direction. She planted a massive kiss on my cheek and a bine crushing hug, which I quickly returned.

 

“I missed you like crazy, Finn!”

 

“M–me too, mom, me too”

 

While hugging her, I kept looking at Cameron who had a stern look plastered across his face, folding his arms. "Tell her" he mouthed. I shook my head, but he glared at me, which made me sigh heavily. Cameron left to another room to give us some privacy. Dammit, this is going to be hard.

 

“M–mom” I stuttered, pulling away from her embrace. She locked gazes with me, the smile never leaving her lips. Well, that is about to change, am I right?

 

Can you imagine telling your parents that you will become a parent yourself.

 

“Yes, sweetheart?”

 

“You better sit down” I said. She stared at me with a puzzled expression.

 

“What?”

 

“I need to tell you something. . .”

Chapter 21 - Killing News

Finn's P.O.V

 

“How's your mom?” asked Cameron while sitting on the stool next to me. I sipped on my juice before responding to him. Obviously the news that I got a girl pregnant, wasn't very thrilling for her.

 

“She've been passed out for an hour” I replied and then glanced at her, laying on the couch.

 

“At least she's not dead, right?” he asked.

 

My eyes widened. “Did I killed her by telling her these news?” that never crossed my mind. What if she died? Oh. My. God.

 

“I don't know. Let's check her pulse. Quick!” Cameron said and we rushed to my mom's side. She was still passed out, obviously she didn't take that well the news that I left someone pregnant. . .

 

Cameron check her pulse. “Still has it” he informed me. I sighed in relief and then took some hair out of my mother's face. I knew she was going to be upset, but I didn't know she would pass out. I know she will get me a lecture about protection, and remind me of course that we had this type of conversation multiple times back in North Carolina. I wish I wouldn't have been that drunk the night I met her. Plus, I had to prove my point that I could get any girl I wanted, since the boys were making fun of the fact that girls usually never lay attention to me—bullshit, I would tell them. And there was Gwen, sweet and beautiful Gwen. Who happened to be in that same bar the same night as me. With that gorgeous and innocent like dress I loved in her. She looked pure and angelic, with that cute smile that could light an entire dark room.

 

“Mom, can you hear me?” I asked. She mumbled something I didn't quite get, she slowly opened her eyes and looked at me.

 

“I-I had the worst nightmare ever” she said and I helped her sit up straight. “I dreamed you actually had sex with someone and you didn't used protection. And now that girl is pregnant” she chuckled nervously, staring at me, a glint of hope lingered in her small round eyes. But, of course, Cameron's and I's serious look gave it all away, which made her smile fade away.

 

“Umm, mom?” I called her, “that wasn't a dream”

 

“What!?” she nearly screamed. “Finnley Tyler Harries, how could you!?”

 

“It was supposed to be a one-time thing. . .But then, well. . .This happened” I said and scratched the back of my head.

 

“How many times have I told you about this topic, huh? We spend hours and hours talking about how to be careful cause this type of things could happen. . .”

 

“I know, I know mom. We were drunk and well—”

 

“Don't finish that” she cut me off. “Where is this poor and misfortune girl?”

 

“In-in her house, here. . .In L.A.” I replied. She stood up and grabbed her purse from the counter. She put her hair in a ponytail and then turned to look at both of us. She walked towards us and looked at me straight in the eyes.

 

“I want to see her” she said and crossed her arms across her chest.

 

I looked at Cameron and then back at her. “Mom, I-I don't think that's a good idea. I went to her house to speak to her, and her mom knows, she doesn't want me near her. She hates me”

 

“Of course she is indeed hating you right now. I would hate you too if you leave my daughter pregnant” she said. “Now, let's go”

 

“Perhaps, I should just stay here” I said.

 

She let go a sigh, but nodded. “Okay, then give me the address and I'll go. . .I need to see who did you got pregnant”

 

Gwen's P.O.V

 

Once I finished my chocolate ice cream, I turned towards my mom, who was still sipping on her strawberry one. “Thank you” I said, which made her look at me. She smiled and placed her hand on top of mine, which was cold thanks to her ice cream.

 

“I'm your mom, Gwen. And I just want the best for you. . .This bomb did explode n my face, but we'll find a solution, I promise”

 

“Yeah” I simply said.

 

“But, I don't want you any near Finn. You get that?” she asked.

 

“Why not?” I asked.

 

“Sweetie, you can't be near this guy, look what he did to you. . .Plus, he will most likely just vanish away once this baby's born. What tells you he's not taking off in a plane right now? Boys are like that. Trust me”

 

I nodded at the same time my phone buzzed. “Excuse me” I said to my mom. She motioned for me to grab my phone. I did and Finn's name popped up. I furrowed my eyebrows in confusion as I read the following text: 

 

Finn:

 

My mom's on her way to your house, she wants to meet you. 

 

I looked up to my mom who just finished her ice cream. “We have to go back home” I simply said.

 

• • •

 

“So, who is this woman?”  my mom asked as we started driving to our house.

 

“Finn's mom” I simply replied. “Finn said she wants to meet me. . .” when my mom parked, I saw that there was this lady at our front door, waiting. I quickly unbuckled the seatbelt and got out of the car.

 

“Excuse me, ma'am” I called her attention. She turned around and the first thing she noticed was my stomach.

 

"Are you Finn's mom?" I asked.

 

She nodded. “You must be Gwen, right? I'm Elizabeth. . .” she said and extended her hand for me to shake it. I did and offered her a polite smile. If you would've told me that I would be meeting Nash's mom, I would've laughed in your face. This is all so weird and awkward. I'm standing in front of his mom, I just want the ground to eat me.

 

“Hi” said my mom while standing beside me. She put her arm around my shoulder and stared at Elizabeth. “I'm Gwen's mom, Kate, and you are?”

 

“I-I'm Elizabeth. Apparently, the father's mom. . .” she said and shifted uncomfortably. “I just came to meet her” she said now looking at me. “I'm so sorry, I know you must be going through such a tough time. . .”

 

I nodded.

 

“Your son didn't come with you, did he?” my mom asked.

 

Elizabeth quickly shook her head. “N-no. . .He didn't want to, I offered him, but he figured you would be mad at him. Which I totally understand. . .” she said and put a strand of hair behind her ear. “Look, I bet he didn't mean any harm. . .”

 

"Perhaps he didn't, but it’s done. And I don't want him any near my daughter. He seems like a good kid, but I think is for the best. Wouldn't you do the same thing?”

 

She nodded slowly. “I would. . .And I understand why you came with that decision. It was–it was very nice meeting you. You are such a brave and lovely girl. I do wish you the best. And I know you're furious at my son, but. . .If you do need anything, you can come to me. Anything. . .I know she has you—” she said looking at my mom. "But I would like to help, that's the least I can do”

 

“Thank you. We'll keep that in mind. Thanks for dropping by” my mom said coldly, which made me look at her. My mom has that typical look that you can't decipher what she's feeling. She can be sad, angry, or something going on in her life, and no one would have a clue. . .But I'm her daughter, and I know her so well.

Elizabeth nodded one last time before turning on her heels and left. I turned to my mom, who was nearly throwing daggers at her with one simple look. “Mom” I called her attention. She crossed her arms across her chest.

 

“What?” she asked.

 

“She seems like a nice woman, why were you being so cold?”

 

“I have the right to be that way. . .”

 

“But she isn't the one that got me pregnant” I reminded her.

 

“No but. . .She–she raised the one that did this to you and—”

 

“You know what? I don't want to talk about this anymore. I’m tired. . .I will just have to lie down. Thanks for the ice cream” I said. She nodded and then kissed the top of my head. I walked inside and then straight to my bed. Today has been so stressful and the day is not even over yet.

 

I lied down on my bed and hugged my pillow, trying to sleep and think about something else. . .

Chapter 22 - Just Kiss Her Already!

“Push, Gwen. . .You can do it!” Finn said and squeezed my hand tightly. I tilt my head sideways just to see my mom.

 

“C'mon, honey, you can do it!"” she said. I tried to breath but it was so hard.

 

“You're almost there, push some more!” said the doctor. There was something wrong, I could feel it. I started feeling weak and I forgot how to breath for just one second. But I had to keep pushing, and that's what I did. Finn caressed my hand and parted his mouth in two as he widened his eyes. My mom gasped and covered her mouth with both of her hands. The doctor had an apologetic look on her face.

 

“I'm so sorry. . .It was born dead” she said while she took the baby out. I shook my head repeatedly. It stained with blood all over the sheet, sweat across my forehead.

 

“No. . .It can't be possible. No!” I screamed while I cried uncontrollably. Finn kissed the top of my head.

“I'm sorry, baby” he said into my hair.

 

“No!” I screamed as I stood up abruptly. I started breathing heavily and had sweat across my forehead. I scanned my surroundings and sighed in relief as I realized I was in my room. I looked at my window, it was night already.

 

“What!? What happened!? Gwen, are you okay!?” Alec asked frantically.

 

“I'm sorry, I just. . .I just had a nightmare” I said as I rubbed my eyes.

 

“Do you want to talk about it?” he asked.

 

I shook my head. “Not really. . .”

 

“Will you be okay?”

 

“Maybe” I said. He nodded and was about to leave when I stopped him.

 

“Alec, wait!” I said which made him stop. “Would you, umm. . .Would you stay here with me, for just a minute?”

 

"I'll stay with you for as long as you want" he said and lied in bed next to me. He wrapped his arms around my waist and kissed the top of my head.

 

“Thank you” I mumbled.

 

“You're my little sister. . .I would do anything for you” he whispered.

 

• • •

 

I opened one eye lazily and saw there was sunlight outside. I felt Alec's arm still there. . .I'm so happy and lucky to have him as my older brother. I love him.

 

“Alec” I whispered his name, but he didn't move. I slowly moved his hands and got out of bed. Alec was with his eyes closed, he grabbed my pillow and hugged it tightly. I smiled at how innocent he looks when he's sleeping. I leaned in to him and kissed the top of his head. I shook him slightly, but he just groaned. I chuckled but wouldn't give up. He've been always a battle when it came to waking up.

 

“Alec, you have to wake up. . .” I said. He opened one eye lazily and then looked at me. He sat up straight and then brushed his messy hair with his long fingertips.

 

“Good morning, sis” he said. “Why are you being so annoying this early?”

 

“Ha-ha, funny. . .We can't sleep all day” I said and crossed my arms across my chest. He chuckled and shook his head.

 

“But I like sleeping while hugging you, is like being with a teddy bear” he had a pout on his face. And he might be the oldest one, but he looks so adorable when he does that. I shook my head and rolled my eyes playfully.

 

“How're you feeling?” he asked.

 

“Fine, I guess. . .I don't feel nauseous, so that's good” I said and undid my now messy ponytail. I ran my fingers through my tangled hair. I grabbed my clothes and then walked inside the bathroom to wash my face so I can wake up a little bit more. I battled with my hair like I always do, and tried to make it look decent. I ended up putting it in a messy bun. I put on sweatshirt and jean shorts, with black converse. I went to my room again and saw Alec still on my bed, with his arms behind his head, staring at the ceiling.

 

“Don't you plan in getting out of my bed?” I asked while placing my hands on my hips.

 

He shook his head. “Nah, I'm good. This is comfortable” he shrugged. I rolled my eyes just when my phone started ringing. I sighed and then grabbed it from my nightstand. I checked the caller ID: Dani.

 

“Hey” I said while sitting on the edge of the bed.

 

“Hey, stranger. You haven't called me” she said, and I could just imagine her pouting.

 

“It’s been such a hard day yesterday, you have no idea” I said and started explaining everything to her. I glanced at Alec, he went back to sleep, I shook my head while chuckled slightly.

 

• • •

 

“Are you serious?” she asked. I nodded even though she couldn't see me. I paced back and forth, biting my lower lip.

 

“Yup” I said popping the p. I briefly touched the bump in my stomach with my hand. It felt weird, so weird. . .

 

“So, your mom knows you're pregnant, and that Finn is the father. . .God, this is way better than soap operas” she said giggling.

 

“You're seriously laughing at my misery?” I asked.

 

“No, no, I'm sorry. . .You're right” she let go a sigh. “So, would it be weird if I come over? I don't want to be here anymore. My mom bought this new gym set and let me tell you something. . .She has no legs to wear shorts” she said which made me laugh.

 

“Yes, you can come over. . .” I said and saw how Alec jumped out of bed, which made me jump back slightly. I said ‘goodbye’ and hung up. I furrowed my eyebrows in confusion.

 

“Dani's coming?” he asked.

 

I nodded. He quickly rushed to the door but I stopped him. “What's up with you?”

 

“I can't look like crap in front of her. . .I need to look hot. Well. . .Hotter than I am right now” he said motioning to himself. I shook my head and smiled. He rushed to his room, almost tripping a couple of times. It is so cute when he isn't with another girl and he just wants to impress Dani. They will end up together, I just know it.

 

Just when I was going out of my room, my phone buzzed. I checked the screen and instantly a text popped up.

 

Finn:

 

Are you okay? Please, let's talk. . .I need to know how are you?

 

I decided not to answer him, I can't. . .Just yesterday my mom found out about something like this, I can't be talking to him when she told me not to. I walked downstairs and saw my mom on the couch with a Cosmo Magazine, flipping through the pages every now and then. I slowly walked towards her and sat down on the couch across from hers.

 

“Hey” I said. She looked up at me and smiled. She took off her reading glasses and placed them on top of the coffee table.

 

“Hi sweetie. . .” she said. We stayed there a few minutes in silence, I just didn't know what to say. I mean, she received the bomb of me being pregnant, I obviously need to choose my words carefully before speaking. . .This is so awkward.

 

“Do you have anything else to tell me?” she asked out of nowhere. I furrowed my eyebrows in confusion.

 

“What?”

 

“You know. . .You're pregnant, but is there something I should know? Something you didn't tell me?”

 

I shook my head. “N-no. . .” I replied at the same time the doorbell rang. I rushed to the door and opened it. I sighed in relief just to see Dani. I hugged her tightly.

 

“So glad to see you” I said.

 

“Me too, it seems like forever since we saw each other” she said and got inside. I nodded and followed her to the kitchen.

 

“Didn't you girls saw each other at the party on Friday?” my mom asked while coming inside, she sat at the bar stool and then exchanged looks from me to Dani.

 

“Yeah, but when you are not with your best friend, days just go so slow. . .It looks like an eternity” Dani said while grabbing the juice carton and poured some in two glasses. I nodded in agreement as I took a sip. “So, when you think three days passed, in best friend language, that meant like if three years passed”

 

My mom chuckled. “Alright you two. . .I will go get dress and go to the grocery store. Please don't do any mess or get into trouble” she said and kissed the top of my head. “Call if you need anything, baby. Or if you feel bad, just tell me, okay?” she whispered into my ear. I nodded and smiled. She caressed my cheek before turning on her heels and walked out.

 

“So, she does know about it. . .” Dani said and sat on the counter, something my mom hates when she does. I nodded and finished my juice. “Wow. That must've been hard to tell”

 

“I didn't even tell her. She found the Pregnancy book and the positive test on my closet” I sighed.

 

“Oh my God! Are you serious right now!? Shut up!” she said. “But really? A pregnancy book?”

 

“I was curious” I said defensively. She chuckled and shook her head in amusement. Just then, I heard footsteps rushing downstairs. I tilt my head sideways just to see Alec standing there, grinning at my best friend.

 

He was wearing a plain black shirt, with blue jeans, and black converses. His hair was disheveled and gave him that typical bad boy appearance. He was even wearing cologne. . .He might be so into her. How can Dani not notice that?

 

“Hey, how are you?" he asked. Dani looked at me before turning to Alec.

 

“I'm good. . .How are you?” she asked.

 

“Good, good” he said and scratched the back of his head nervously. Any ounce of confidence he was feeling, vanished away. You might be asking: How do I know that? Well, my lovely friends. . .I know my older brother. And when he bites his lower lip and scratches the back of his head while briefly looking at the ground, that means he's nervous and doesn't know what to do. Usually girls come to him, he doesn't need to ask their names, they just tell him.

 

“You know what? This is awkward, so. . .I will go upstairs, and you won't come up until you talk to my brother” I said turning to Dani. She widened her eyes and opened her mouth to speak but I covered it.

 

“Nah-ah-ah” I said. “Stay” and then went upstairs. I'm tired that they're not solving their differences, I just know they're meant to be.

 

Alec's P.O.V

 

She looks so beautiful. I just see her there, looking so flawless with her hair put in a high ponytail and delicate pinky lips. She was wearing a flowery dress with brown sandals. I love the way she bites her lower lip when she's thoughtful or confused about something. I love when every time she comes over, her scent flies around the whole house. And the way she's so spontaneous and kind, it makes my heart melt.

 

But she's looking anywhere but me, and I hate that. I hate that I know she has something for me and she doesn't want to accept that, even though you believe she hates me, she doesn't. . .I can assure you that. I hate that she doesn't remember that back when we were in school together and she was in Elementary and I was in Middle School, I would be the one that hugged her when she was afraid, about anything. I hate, hate, hate that. I would be the one that protected her when some bully would pick on her. Just like when my sister was in pain, and I would feel it. . .When Dani, this girl in front of me was in pain, I would be crazy and do anything to try and bring a smile to her beautiful lips.

 

Even if sometimes I messed around with her, and act like an idiot. . .I love her. When I pranked her, it was because there was no way I could show her how I felt because I knew she would reject me. . .She's afraid to show her feelings. She has always been that way ever since I could remember.

 

“So. . .” I started. She glanced at me briefly before looking at the ground once again, playing with her fingers. “Alright. . .This is ridiculous” I said and took long strides towards her.

 

“What are you—” she started saying but I cut her off by crashing my lips to hers. She tried to pull away but I grabbed her from her waist so she wouldn't move. She wrapped her arms around my neck and kissed me back. I pulled away for just a second since I wanted to see how she feels about this.

 

“I hate you” was her response, and that alone made me laugh.

 

“I hate you too” I said and we were back to kissing again.

 

Gwen's P.O.V

 

I smiled as I watched them kiss, finally. . .

 

‘My work here is done’ I thought to myself and walked directly inside my room so I can give them some privacy.

Chapter 23 - Avoid Him at all Costs

Finn's P.O.V

 

“She seems like a lovely girl” my mom commented while sitting beside me on the couch. I nodded in agreement. She is a lovely girl, more than that. . .She's beautiful and so sweet. And when we kissed, there was a connection. . .I know we had it. That reminds me, that we didn't had a chance to talk about it. But now that her mother knows, things are going down. For starters, I'm not allowed to see her, as her mother said to me. I know I fucked up, but that's my baby too. Although, that doesn't take the fact that I am indeed an idiot.

 

“How'd you slept?” I asked.

 

“Good, good. . .It is a very comfortable and practical house. Great job”

 

“What did you guys talked about?” I couldn't help it; I need to know. When my mom came back home yesterday, she didn't say anything. She walked quietly passed us and locked herself in the guest room. I couldn't sleep that whole night. I wanted to know every single detail of what my mom did and what she said.

 

“The mother didn't say much. I believe she just wanted me to get the hell out of there as soon as possible. And I don't blame her, I would've done the same”

 

I let go a frustrated sigh and covered my face with both of my hands. My mom patted my back soothingly. “Skyler have been asking for you” I instantly looked at her. “She will most likely come and visit you”

 

“Really!? When?” I asked.

 

“Perhaps next week. . .But she can't know about this” my mom warmed me.

 

“But she wouldn't understand anyway. I mean, she's only seven”

 

“Finn, she's smarter than you think. . .” she said while crossing her arms across her chest.

 

I chuckled. “I know. . .”

 

“Hey guys” said Cameron while plopping down on the couch beside us. After talking some more I invited them to eat something, I mainly did it to clear my head, and stop thinking about Gwen.

 

Gwen's P.O.V

 

“It was amazing” Dani said while sitting next to me on the bed. I nodded and smiled. Her cheeks are flushed and her eyes held a special glint. She was happy. . .“I mean, I thought I hated him, but no, I don't. With that kiss, I felt how everything started making sense. How I felt about Alec in a way I never felt with anyone else. Ever. Thanks Gwen” she said and hugged me. I hugged her back and we lied down together on my bed.

 

“You're welcome. . .I'm so happy for you” I said. “Hey, want to go eat something?” I asked as we both sat up straight.

 

She gave me a look and crossed her arms across her chest. “I just had such a magical moment and all you think is eating?”

 

“Pregnant girl here, I have reasons” I said.

 

“You're using this pregnant card way too much” she rolled her eyes playfully.

 

I laughed. “Oh shut up, I'm sure you would do the same. . .Now let's go”

 

“Fine, but I'll choose the place, there's this restaurant everyone's talking about, and I seriously want to try it” she said and grabbed my hand, dragging me to her car

 

• • •

 

“I heard the food here is delicious” Dani commented while we entered the place. It was very fancy looking, the only thing you could hear where all the people chattering and laughing. The smell of food lingered around the whole building, it made my mouth watered. We walked up to this lady at the door with a black folder on her hand.

 

“Table for two” Dani said. The lady smiled politely and then guided us to a table near a fountain. I sat down and grabbed the menu which I shared with Dani. I couldn't decide, everything sounded so delicious.

 

I looked at a couple in one corner kissing, then a family all eating peacefully, and later I noticed something else. It was a very familiar guy with dark brown hair, with red shirt and loose jeans, with white vans. He was laughing about something and that smile with those dimples made me remember: 

 

Cameron. Philips.

 

And where Cameron is. . .He will be with him too.

 

“No, no, no” I mumbled while covering my face with the menu. Dani furrowed her eyebrows in confusion.

“G, what's wrong?” she asked while following my gaze. Her mouth parted in two and soon we were both hiding behind a menu, earning looks from other people there, but I couldn't care less. The last thing I want is to deal with Finn.

 

“What do we do?” I asked.

 

“I don't know” Dani said.

 

I cautiously looked up and saw Finn sitting down, his mom beside him. It seemed like he felt my gaze, because he looked directly in my eyes. “This can't be happening” I said and quickly hide again. “He-he saw me” I said. 

 

Finn's P.O.V

I can't believe it.

 

She's here. Gwen is here. . .

 

“Dude, she's here” I whispered in Cameron's ear. He looked at the table I pointed and parted his mouth in two.

 

“She's with Dani. Sweet!” he smirked. I gave him a look and he raised his hands up in defeat. “What are you going to do?” he asked.

 

“I don't know. I guess I have to talk to her”

 

“Are you guys okay?” my mom asked.

 

“Uhhh, yeah. . .I just—” I trailed off.

 

“Wait, is that Gwen?” my mom asked shocked. I let go a heavy sigh as I saw her hiding behind that menu to avoid eye contact with me.

 

“Yes, she is. . .And I'm not standing here with arms crossed. I need to talk to her, and that's exactly what I'm going to do” I said and stood up.

 

Gwen's P.O.V

 

Oh crap.

 

He's coming. I can't believe it. I have to get out of here. But if I try to escape, he will catch me no matter what. I'm not ready to face him, neither talk to him or whatsoever. We kissed, then he appeared at my door, and my mother told me not to talk to him, even though I want to kiss him again. And I know you might be thinking: Why the hell do you want to kiss him again?

 

I just never felt such relief when our lips connected. I felt pleasure and passion, he made my stomach flutter when he takes my hair out of my face, or when he hugs me and places his chin on top of my head. He felt so warm the few times we touched.

 

“Gwen?” I heard his deep voice. Dammit.

 

I let go a heavy sigh and then placed the menu down, revealing both Dani and I. Finn exchanged looks between the two of us. I can't believe he's here, why? The last thing I want is to see him.

 

“Gwen, can we talk? Privately?” he asked turning to Dani who was glaring at him.

 

“No, she's my best friend, so if you want to say something it has to be in front of me, Harries” she said and crossed her arms across her chest.

 

Then Cameron appeared, grinning at my best friend. She let out an annoyed scoff, rolling her eyes at the sight of her past fling. “Cameron?”

 

“Sup, Dani. So glad you remember me” he winked.

 

“I wish I didn't” she said.

 

“Why? I wasn't like Finn; I did call you after we had sex” he said.

 

“What!?” Finn and I said at the same time while exchanging looks from Dani to Cameron.

 

“Why didn't you tell me?” I asked.

 

“I-I felt bad for you since this asshole over here didn't called you. I just met up with him once, I swear!”

 

“I'm getting tired with this asshole thing” Finn said.

 

“Don't worry, I have a list full of nicknames to call you once I get bored with calling you asshole”

 

“I want to hear them” Cameron butted in, which made Finn glare at him.

 

“Whatever. . .We don't have time for this. Suddenly, I lost my appetite” I said and stood up, so did Dani.

 

“Gwen, please. . .I'm begging you” Finn said while grabbing both of my arms. I tried to get away from his grip but he didn't let go.

 

“Is everything okay over here?” Elizabeth asked while putting her hands on her hips, exchanging looks from Finn to me.

 

“Yes, everything's okay, mom” Finn said and finally let me go.

 

“We were just leaving” Dani said while grabbing my hand leading us to the door, but Finn grabbed my arm and pulled me closer to him. I stared straight into his beautiful chocolate brown eyes.

 

“You're not leaving” he said.

 

“Finn, let the poor girl go. She've had enough already” his mom said. Finn shook his head stubbornly, he leaned in a little bit, and I found myself dropping my view to his lips, so did he. But I had to stop myself, just one little move and we would be kissing, and that couldn't happen.

 

“Finn, please” I whispered. He looked at my eyes again, and sighed. He slowly let me go and took a step back.

 

“C'mon Gwen” Dani said and walked outside, but I couldn't move. I stayed there staring at Finn.

 

“Sorry” I mouthed and walked out of the building. One tear rolling down my cheek. Honestly, I don't know why I'm crying for him? Is not like we were dating and we broke up. But something inside me felt so bad when I stepped back from him. Without his warm touch. I got inside the car and tilt my head sideways to see my best friend turning on the engine. I saw in front of me, Finn stepping out of the restaurant staring back at me. He put his hand in his jean pockets and didn't break his gaze. I looked down at my fingers not wanting to look back at him, somehow I felt horrible. . .

 

“Everything will be alright” Dani said while grabbing my hand. I nodded, but I wasn't quite sure. Ever since this baby thing, I don't know if anything will be alright anymore. I think things are going down the drain. 

 

Chapter 24 - Beautiful Sights

I stared out the window as the trees went by, the blue sky beyond us, the birds flying away. And that's exactly what I wanted to be. . .A bird. You might be thinking I had gone insane already, with all this drama and this mess my life had suddenly turned into. But is the reality. . .Wouldn't you want to have the ability to fly, and fly far away to avoid any troubles? Because I would pay millions and millions of dollars to fly in an instant.

 

I constantly get the feeling of escaping, from everything. Responsibilities, drama, choices, just everything. I want to fly away and never look back, why would I? The only thing that's here, down on the ground, are constant unnecessary problems that I have no strength to deal with right now.

 

I'm tired, confused, sad, all at the same time.

 

When Dani dropped me off at my house I just wanted to lay down on my bed—and like when I was young—I wanted to feel protected with my sheets and covers, just close my eyes and go to my happy place.

 

When I got in I found my brother sitting on the couch, talking in the phone. He waved at me and then went back to his conversation. Surprisingly, I wasn't hungry, so I just walked to my room. I plopped down on my bed and checked my phone quickly so then I could sleep. If Dani texted me and I don't answer, she would surely get pissed. Let's say she's so overprotective. But I like it, she's my best friend, and that means she loves me.

 

I had no texts from Dani, but from Finn.

 

Finn:

 

You know that I won't give up, right?

 

Finn:

 

This ignoring you're doing just makes me fight harder.

 

Finn:

 

We kissed a couple nights ago and we haven't talked about it. I know you felt something.

Finn:

 

Gwen, Gwen, Gwen, Gwen, Gwen, Gwen, Gwen, Gwen, Gwen, Gwen, Gwen, Gwen, Gwen, Gwen, Gwen, Gwen, Gwen, Gwen, Gwen, Gwen, Gwen, Gwen, Gwen, Gwen, Gwen, Gwen. I can keep going all day, you know? ;)

 

Finn:

 

Babe, please.

 

Finn:

 

I know you're reading this; you're just deciding not to answer it.

 

I rolled my eyes and turned my phone off before placing it on my nightstand. I covered my face with both of my hands. I just don't know why he doesn't understand that we can't talk, my mom told me not to. I understand he's the father, but still. . .

 

I heard a knocking at my door, my brother leaned at the doorframe. He smiled at me and crossed his arms across his chest.

 

“I’m going on a date with Dani” he informed me.

 

“Wow. You kiss once and now you're a couple. You don't need to thank me” I said cocking an eyebrow. 

 

“We're not a couple, yet. Although I would love to, I don't want to rush things you know” he said.

 

“I told you that you guys were meant to be” I said honestly, smiling at the fact that they go out together. It's been a while since the last time they actually were nice to each other. With Alec's constant flirting and pranks on Dani, she just hated him, though I knew better. . .I always knew she secretly had a crush on him, and Alec giving her so much attention, always made her happy.

 

“And you were right. So thank you” he said and walked towards me. He placed a soft kiss on top of my head. “When I come back, you and I will watch a movie, is that good?”

 

“Yeah, sure. . .Hey, where's mom?” I asked furrowing my eyebrows in confusion. “And when is dad coming home?”

 

“She had something of her job, and dad is coming tomorrow” he said. I nodded and lied back down, placing my head on the headboard. He gave me one last wave before turning on his heels to leave.

 

Once he left, I closed my eyes, hugged my pillow tightly, and tried to think of something nice, something that doesn't involved that blue-eyed boy that can't stop making my life so complicated.

 

• • •

 

I opened my eyes lazily, not really wanting to wake up, but the sound of something hitting my window made me sat up straight. I walked towards it and opened it.

 

“Unbelievable” I muttered under my breath as I saw Finn standing there.

 

“Rapunzel, Rapunzel. . .Let your beautiful hair down” he said jokingly. I rolled my eyes.

 

“You're such a dork”

 

“Maybe I am, but I'm tired of you escaping from me. . .Why can't you tell me how you feel to my face, huh? If you do hate me like it seems, say it to my face, Gwen” he said. I quickly rushed downstairs and opened the main door. I took long strides towards him. He's right, I won't escape anymore, I will just tell him everything I feel right now. He was casually standing there with his arms crossed across his chest.

 

“You know how I feel? I feel angry, sad, tired. And you know what? I'm sick of—” he cut me off by grabbing my face with both of his hands and connecting our lips together. I wanted to pull away, I truly did, but I must admit that I felt such relief with him kissing me. I wrapped my arms around his neck to be closer to him, the warmth of his touch was comforting. Our lips moving in sync, like if they were made for each other. All my worries vanishing away in an instant. He placed one hand on my waist and then the other caressing my cheek delicately.

 

We pulled away, and he rested his forehead against mine. “I don't know about you. . .But I feel much better” he said. I nodded in agreement and he gave me a peck on the lips.

 

He hugged me tightly, resting his chin on top of my head. “You're such an idiot” I said into his shirt.

 

He chuckled. “I know that already. . .” he said and then locked gazes with me. He grabbed my chin. “But I know you felt something, you can't deny it now”

 

“I did. But that doesn't matter” I said and took a step back from him, but that just made him stand closer to me. I looked at the ground, and he caressed my cheek. “My mom doesn't want me hanging out with you” I admitted.

 

“I understand. But this just makes me want to fight harder to be with you. I don't know what you did to me, Gwen. But I just feel so close to you. When we met, I was just looking for fun, to have sex and have a wild night. And then I got to know you, and I realized I just want to be with you. To protect you, to take care of you, to touch you, and hug you. I don't want to let you go”

 

I finally looked at him and peck his lips, closing my eyes briefly. “Let's go somewhere” he whispered.

 

“What? We can't. . .” I said and put a strand of hair behind my ear.

 

“We can. . .And we will” he smirked. I looked back at my house.

 

“Don't worry, everything will be alright” he said and kissed me once more. When he pulled away he smiled.

“I want to show you something, c'mon. . .” he said and held out his hand for me to take it. I hesitantly stared at it, and bit my lower lip.

 

“Last time you told me you wanted to show me something, I ended up pregnant” I reminded him.

 

“But this won't be like last time, I swear" he said. I stared at his hands once more.

 

"C'mon, Gwen. . .Stop overthinking things” he said. I slowly grabbed his hand and he gave it a little squeeze. He lead me to his car and I buckled in. I tilt my head sideways to see him turning on the engine.

 

He smiled at me. “There is this beautiful place I want to show you. Do you trust me?” he asked.

 

I nodded.

 

“Let's go then. . .” he said.

 

• • •

 

I don't know how much time it was since we left my house. I just see that we were passing house after house, tree after tree. "Where are we going?" I asked finally, the curiosity eating me alive.

 

“Be patient, we're almost there” he said. I stared out the window. The sun setting down, leaving trades of pink and blue in the sky. It was beautiful, I won't deny that. Minutes passed by and the car came to a stop.

 

“We're here” he announced and killed the engine. He got out of the car and then walked to my door. He opened it and then grabbed my hand. We walked some more and we were somehow facing the whole city. The view was stunning. The lights, the silence, everything. The sun has gone down already, so it’s all dark, the moon in one corner, the sky full of shining stars. I was gawking by the view in front of me, I've never seen such thing in my entire life.

 

“I know, beautiful, right?” he asked while standing behind me. I nodded and smiled as I stared at all the city lights.

 

He put his arm around my waist, hugging me from behind, he placed his chin on my shoulder.

 

“It takes my breath away” I said honestly.

 

“Now you know what I feel whenever I look at you” he said. I turned around to face him.

 

“Thanks for bringing me here” I said. He grabbed both of my hands and kissed them, then pecked my lips.

 

“Anything for you” he said, and then kissed my stomach. “And you too, baby”

 

I giggled and then hugged him. We were like that for I don't know how much. It felt so good I didn't want to pull away. I don't understand how it was from avoiding him to actually enjoy being with him, how does he do that?

 

He kissed the top of my head and then backed away. He went to his car and then took out a mantel. He placed it in the ground and then sat down. I furrowed my eyebrows in confusion. “Why do you have that with you?” I asked.

 

“Just in case you agree to come with me today” he grinned.

 

“And you knew I would say yes?” I asked.

 

“I had hopes” he patted the spot next to him. I smiled and then did as told. He put his arm around my shoulder and then kissed my forehead.

 

“Thanks for being here with me” he said and then leaned in, he kissed me so delicately it was so addictive. His lips were so moist and soft. I placed my hand on his cheek and he placed his on my leg. He gently started laying me on my back on the ground. When he broke the kiss, he stared at me and smiled. He wrapped his arms around me and we just stayed there, under the stars. 

Chapter 25 - Little White Lie

I opened my eyes and felt how strong arms were wrapped around me. I smiled and closed them again. The birds were singing and the sun was shining in my face. That made me open my eyes abruptly. I sat up straight and scanned my surroundings, I tilt my head sideways and saw Finn sound asleep.

 

It was daylight. We stayed asleep together, the whole night. I didn't warn anybody. . .I'm screwed. Oh no.

 

I desperately shook Finn awake, who opened his eyes in a second. He sat up straight too and looked at me and then at the sky. He rubbed his face with both of his hands.

 

“Holy shit” he muttered.

 

“Finn! We stayed asleep. They're going to kill me when I get back!” I said exasperated and then stood up from the ground, so did him.

 

“Hey, hey. . .Calm down, everything will be just fine” he said and then hold both of my shoulders, giving them a little squeeze. I shook my head and crossed my arms across my chest.

 

“I can't calm down. Don't you get it? I'm. Screwed” I said and put a strand of hair behind my ear.

 

“I will take you home, okay?” he said and grabbed my face with both of his hands. He placed a kiss on my cheek. He picked up the mantel and then we went to his car. The ride was completely silent, and I couldn't be more thankful. I feel like we would say one word and my head could explode. I'm shaking desperately, and I feel anxious to return. It felt like forever when we parked in front of my house.

 

I turned to Finn who just killed the engine, he was unbuckling his seatbelt, but I stopped him. “Please. . .Don't get out. The last thing I need is for them to figure out I was all night with you”

 

He sighed. “But it was my fault, I don't want them to be angry at you. I rather take the blow for you”

 

“It's okay, really. . ." I said and grabbed his hand, placing a kiss on top of it. "I'll think of something”

 

“I'm sorry” he said with an apologetic look.

 

“It's alright. . .I'm sorry for freaking out like that. I actually had a nice time” I said. He kissed my lips shortly. I unbuckled my seatbelt and then went out of the car. I let go a heavy sigh while staring at the front door, trying to prepare myself to go in. I turned around and saw Finn, waving at me. I smiled and waved back. I turned towards the door and opened it just to see my family all gathered in the kitchen. My mom was pacing back and forth, my dad sitting down fidgeting with his fingers nervously with a worried expression, and my brother in the verge of tears. He was the first one to see me.

 

“Gwen! There you are!” he said and rushed towards me. He wrapped his arms around my waist and hugged me tightly, burying his face in my hair. He was shaking with fear and relief washed over his face. “Don't ever do that again” he said into my hair. When we pulled away, my parents were the ones to hug me.

 

“Are you okay!?” my mom asked while checking me to see if I had any wounds. "Where were you!?"

 

“Mom, I'm fine, really” I said and then turned to my dad. “Hey daddy. How was your trip?” I asked innocently.

 

“Everything was fine until your mother called me last night saying that my only daughter wasn't here and was nowhere to be found” he said crossing his arms across his chest. I nervously bit the inside of my cheek.

 

“We were about to call the cops, Gwen” said my mom. “Where. Were. You?” she repeated.

 

I stared at the ground and then back at them. “I was–I was with D-Dani. I went over to her house, we were watching movies and stayed asleep” I lied. I looked at Alec who was giving me a suspicious look.

 

My parents sighed in relief. “You had to warn us that. Imagine my worry when your brother, who was crying his eyes out, called to see you weren't anywhere in the house the whole night. We didn't sleep at all because we were worried sick”

 

“I know. . .And I'm sorry” I said. They both hugged me again and I told them to go to bed to regain strength. Alec stayed, his arms crossed, and kept staring at me.

 

“Well, I'm very tired. So—” I trailed off while trying to walk away, but he grabbed my arm.

 

“You fooled mom and dad. . .But you don't fool me, Gwen” he said.

 

“What are you talking about?” I asked, trying to sound as innocent as possible, though I had this strange feeling at the pit of my stomach.

 

“I'm talking about that you just lied to them. You weren't with Dani, I was with her. And you never came along. When I got here, you were gone. . .So tell me the truth, Gwen. You were with him, weren't you?”

 

“When you came here, I was already on my way to her house” I said and put a strand of hair behind my ear. 

“With what car, huh? Or did you walk?”

 

“I took a cab” I said.

 

“I trust you, Gwen, I don't want you to get hurt. And by the way, you only put your hair behind your ear when you're nervous. Why are you nervous if you're supposedly telling me the truth? I know you, my whole life I have known you” he said and walked to his room upstairs. I was left there, completely speechless. . .

 

I hate lying to them, but I know they would be so pissed if I tell them I was with the boy who got me pregnant. I don't need that right now, neither them. . .

Chapter 26 - Career Risking

Finn's P.O.V

 

“Dude, are you serious!?” asked Cameron as I was telling him where I was last night. I sighed and then sat down at the edge of the bed. “That is so cool. . .Did you guys; you know. . .” he grinned. Knowing what he meant by that, I threw him a pillow and glared at him.

 

“What?” he asked innocently.

 

“She's fucking pregnant, and you think we did it?”

 

“Sorry, sometimes I forget you were careless enough not to use a condom”

 

“I was drunk!” I said defensively. “Are you my friend or my enemy?”

 

“Sorry, sorry, sorry. You're right, I should be more supportive” he said and sat down next to me. “I don't know what is wrong with me sometimes”

 

“Sometimes? You're crazy all the time” I laughed. He laughed too and nudged my shoulder playfully.

 

“How was it? You know, being with her?”

 

“It felt. . .Amazing. Nothing mattered, it was just us. I felt so happy to share that moment with her, to be with her” I said. “I don't know what is wrong with me”

 

“Sounds to me like you're in love, don't you agree?” he asked. I tilt my head sideways and looked at him. I smiled and nodded in agreement. It does sound like I was in love. I am in love with Gwen.

 

Suddenly, we heard the doorbell ring. I stood and went to answer it. When I opened it, I saw it was my younger brother, Hayden and my little sister, Skyler. “Hey big bro, she won't shut up about you” he said and put her in the ground. I kneeled down and hugged my little princess. I then stood up and hugged Hayden.

 

“Where's mom?” he asked.

 

“She left half an hour ago to the airport” I replied. I picked Skyler up and placed a kiss on her cheek. She giggled and then wrapped her small and delicate hands around my neck. We sat at the couch and she started messing with my hair.

 

“What did I say about my hair?” I asked playfully.

 

“But your hair is funny” she said.

 

“My hair is funny?” I repeated, laughing.

 

“Yes! I want to style it” she said and kissed my cheek.

 

“I'll let you style it later, okay?” I asked, she nodded excitingly at my response smiled widely. I turned to Harry who sat down on the couch next to me.

 

“Where's Will? I thought he would come too” I asked. I thought my big brother would tag along, how weird. I miss him so much; I haven’t seen him in a while ever since he went away for College.

 

“He couldn't make it, he had to attend to a football practice, plus some meetings about the next game. . .” he shrugged. “Cameron told me that you have some news, he said they were very serious. What's up?” he asked. I looked at Cameron who quickly got inside his room. I rolled my eyes, he just had to open his mouth. It was already hard enough to tell my mom, now I have to tell my little brother about it.

 

“Umm, Sky, why don't you go with Cameron in his room?” I said.

 

“But I want to be with you” she said with a pout on her face, and she looked so adorable. I chuckled and then put her in the ground.

 

“And I will be there in just a second, okay?” I said, but she shook her head. “If you go, I'll let you style my hair”

She smiled and nodded before running to Cameron's room. I turned back to Hayden, he crossed his arms across his chest, and waited patiently for me to tell him.

 

“Where do I begin?” I chuckled nervously while scratching the back of my head.

 

“I'm listening” he said.

 

“I–I just. . .Umm”

 

“Finn, dude, just say it all at once” he said and patted my back.

 

“Alright then. . .” I rubbed my hands and then looked at him straight in the eyes. “I got a girl pregnant”

 

I don't know how long he've been with his mouth wide opened. I've never seen such terrified expression on him. He's always so fearless and chill, that seeing him like this is very surprising. “What!?” he finally asked, screaming.

 

“You heard it” I said.

 

“Please tell me you're joking. . .I'm begging you” he said.

 

“I wish I was joking, but it's true”

 

He rubbed his face with both of his hands and didn't met my gaze until a few minutes later. “Do you even realize how this could ruin your career?" he asked. "Your fans, along with the press, will eat you alive with this if they ever find out. They can't find out. . .”

 

“They will be understanding, if they love me, they will understand. . .” I said.

 

“Finn, it doesn't work out like that. Why do you think they love you, huh? Because you're supposedly the heartthrob, they all want to be with you. Is not only because you make funny YouTube videos or awesome music. All of them want to be ‘Mrs. Grier’. How do you think they will react when they find out about this? I'm telling you this as a brother” he said and placed his hand on my back.

 

“And I appreciate that. . .But you don't understand. I can't just pretend this girl doesn't exist, that will break her. In fact, I think I am in love with her”

 

He gasped. “Well, that's new. . .” he said. “What's her name?”

 

“Gwen” I smiled.

 

“Does mom know about this?”

 

“Yes, she does. . .”

 

He sighed and stood up from the couch. “I want to meet her. . .”

 

“Just like mom, huh? Why do you want to meet her?”

 

“Because, apparently she's caring my niece or nephew. . .I have the right to see her too and know how is she. She might be like the other whores you've dated before”

 

“She's not a whore!” I said defensively. “She's smart, and beautiful, and innocent, and just perfect. Not a whore”

“Then why did you hook up with her in the first place?”

 

“Because. . .The guys dared me to do it. They said I wouldn't be able to make her go to bed with me”

 

“I believe you earned more than just a wild night, don't you think?” he chuckled and then grabbed his backpack from the floor. “Where can I go?”

 

“Well, there's this very nice and comfortable trash can in which you can sleep in, it’s outside” I said jokingly. He sent me a deathly glare and I laughed. “Joking, you can sleep in the guest room, is the room at the end of the hall to the left” I said. He nodded and then walked away.

 

Skyler came rushing towards me. “Can I style your hair now?” she asked. I chuckled and nodded. She grabbed my hand tightly and took me to my room.

 

• • •

 

“Do you like it?” she asked while handing me her mirror. I jokingly put myself in a thinking position, checking the sides.

 

“I love it” I said. She clapped her hands and start giggling non-stop. I picked her up and took her to my bed, I started tickling her and she couldn't stop laughing. I stopped and smiled at my little sister.

 

“You messed with my hair” she said and fixed it. I chuckled and kissed her head. I grabbed my phone and took a selfie of us to upload it on Instagram. I started typing a caption.

 

 

Do you like my new hairstyle? Skyler is my new stylist
#happy #luckytohaveyou 

 

There was a knock on my door, there stood Hayden, trying to hold his laughter, obviously failing.

 

“Now that's awesome” he said.

 

“Aww, thanks, it makes my eyes pop, don't you think?” I said jokingly. I stood up from my bed and walked towards Hayden. “What brings you to my room, Poo Bear?”

 

“Stop calling me that! I'm 15” he huffed and crossed his arms across his chest. I laughed and messed with his hair. "And I'm here because we're leaving. . .” he said. I furrowed my eyebrows in confusion as I followed him to the door.

 

“Where are we going?” I asked.

 

“To Gwen's house, she lives here, right?”

 

“Umm, yeah, but I don't think it's a good idea” I said. “Mom already met her, and met the mother. . .The mom hates me”

 

“She should be pissed as hell with you, look what you did to her daughter” he said.

 

“Okay, I'm fucking tired of hearing people tell me the same thing, alright!? I know she should be mad at me, but could you please stop reminding me that?”

 

“Fine, fine” he sighed. “Let's go, Finn. . .Let's meet her" he said and pulled me by my hand out the door.

Chapter 27 - Yet Another Fight

Gwen's P.O.V

 

My parents had to go out because of their jobs, warning me once more that if I leave and don't tell them, they will ground me until I am fifty, which I totally understand and will not argue with that; I would've reacted the same way if it was my daughter.

 

“Alec, please. . .Just go to your room” I groaned as I stared at my brother leaning at the doorframe. He crossed his arms across his chest.

 

“I promised mom I wouldn't take my eyes off of you. I gave her my word” he said.

 

“That doesn't mean that you have to be watching me like some kind of stalker” I said. He chuckled and shook his head.

 

"I'm worried that you will see him" he huffed.

 

"He's name is Finn; you know? And he's not a bad guy" I said.

 

“What happened, huh? How is that from hating him, you turned into 'he's not a bad guy'?” he asked imitating my voice at the end. I rolled my eyes and sat Indian style on my bed.

 

“First, I don't talk like that. Second, I realized that I can't just judge someone without getting to know them first”

“How do you know that?”

 

“I just do” I said getting annoyed.

 

“He got you pregnant, look at your stomach, Gwen. . .Just look at it for a second. That bump you have, is his mistake” he raised his voice.

 

“It was my mistake too! I didn't know it was going to end up like this. I just. . .I just wanted one night, just one night without thinking of the responsibilities or consequences. I just wanted to have fun. And it had led to this. So I'm sorry if I am such a disappointment. I'm sorry if I am pregnant. I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry”. I said holding the tears back.

 

“Gwen—”

 

“Please, just go. . .” I sighed. “I won't leave; I promise I won't"

 

He didn't say a word, just walked towards me and placed a kiss on my forehead. “I would never think you're a disappointment, I'm sorry if I made you feel that way” he said and walked to his room.

 

I hugged my pillow tightly and wished things could be different. I wish things would be different with Finn too. I just can't help but feel all these emotions when it comes to him, I can't help it. . .

 

I heard the doorbell ring, so I went to answer it. Alec was with his music so loud I'm sure he didn't hear it. I walked downstairs and to the door. I opened it and gasped at who was standing there.

 

It was Finn and. . .Finn?

 

“Is it me, or I'm seeing double?” I asked mostly to myself. They both exchanged looks and then Finn number two approached.

 

“I'm Hayden, Finn's younger brother. . .You must be Gwen, I see” he said. I nodded and put a strand of hair behind my ear, then turned to Finn.

 

“You shouldn't be here” I said.

 

“I know, but Hayden wanted to meet you”

 

“You are beautiful” Hayden said which made me blush.

 

“Wow, wow, wow. Did you come here to meet her or flirt with her?” Finn asked which made me giggle. 

 

“But she is beautiful. You chose her right. . .” Hayden smirked. “Anyway, it's a pleasure to meet you. And how old are you?”

 

“I'm 17, and how old are you, huh? 13?” I asked jokingly.

 

“I am 15 actually, not a baby you know” he said, with an adorable pout plastered across his face.

 

“And Finn, what's up with your hair?” I couldn't hold my laughter. He had sparkles and pink colored bows.

 

“Skyler, do you like it?” he asked while posing jokingly.

 

I nodded, but still I didn't want my brother to figure out that they're here. “Anyway, I seriously have to—”

 

“Well, well, well. . .Look what we have here” Alec said while standing beside me. I parted my mouth in two and then looked at Finn and Hayden. My brother crossed his arms across his chest and glared at Finn.

 

“Alec, just. . .I was telling them to leave already”

 

“I've been having a very hard time believing you lately” he said now looking at me.

 

“I'm your sister. . .Why don't you believe me?” I asked, hurt.

 

“Well, let's see. . .” he said and put himself in a thinking position. “You lied to mom and dad of where you were last night, and you were just with this–with this jerk” he said bitterly.

 

“You're being a jerk right now” Hayden butted in. “Don't you dare insulting my brother like that”

 

“Get out of this” Alec said.

 

“I won't get out of it. . .You mess with my brother, you mess with me” he said and took a step towards Alec. My brother being taller than Hayes, but he wasn't intimidated one bit. Nash tried to get him to step back, but he didn't even budge. He was just staring up at my brother, arms crossed.

 

“Okay, enough. . .Both of you. Please, can you leave, I don't want any trouble” I said and pushed Hayden back slightly. "Please" I whispered to him. He stared at my brother once more and then his face softened when he met my gaze. I looked at him with pleading eyes, and he let go a heavy sigh. Finn and Hayden stepped back, and as I was closing the door, I mouthed 'sorry' to both of them.

 

I turned to my brother with a scowl on my face. “Did you invited them here?” he asked.

 

“What difference does it make if I tell you, huh? Anyway you won't believe anything I say, isn't that right?” I said and stomped towards the stairs.

 

“Gwen, wait a minute” he said. I turned around to face him.

 

“I don't want to talk to you, they weren't doing anything to me. They just wanted to see me, so let me take care of myself”

 

“No, I won't let you, okay? You're still young”

 

"I'm 17 years old! And having a baby if may I add"

 

“That's the point, you're just 17 and somehow you talk to me like if you were 25, which you're not. I'm trying to protect you, because he had sex with you and I'm sure as fuck he didn't care enough to know what happened to you after that, he didn't even know you were pregnant until that day we went to his hotel room. He wouldn't have known if it wasn't for me. He would've been hooking up with other girls! He's a guy! Stop being so fucking naïve and open your eyes, Gwen, and realize he's just like the rest billions of guys that are only looking for one thing, and one thing specifically. . .Sex”

 

“He's not like that! I know him, you don't. It doesn't matter how he was before, he's here and he've been treating me so nicely. You're suffocating me with all this protection. I can take care of myself. And you know what? I don't care how many times you tell me all of those things about him, because–because I love him!”

 

Alec stayed speechless, his jaw almost touching the ground. I quickly ran to my room, closing my door with all my strength. Tears sprung out of my eyes, I lied on my bed, and hugged my pillow tightly. I just wanted to disappear and stop having problems, I just wanted everything to be back to normal. . .

 

My phone buzzed, so I grabbed it from my nightstand to check it. Finn's name popped up.

 

Finn:

 

Are you okay?

 

I started typing a reply.

 

Me:

 

No. Honestly, I'm not :(

 

Finn:

 

I'm so sorry, Gwen. For everything. For having sex with you, for making you fight with your brother, for just everything. . .It is my fault.

 

Me:

 

It's okay, really. . .I just wish it would be easier. Are you going to your Hotel right now?

 

Finn:

 

No, didn't I tell you? Cameron and I finally moved to our new apartment!

 

Me:

 

Oh, that's great!

 

Finn:

 

Yeah, maybe someday you could come and visit. . .

 

Me:

 

Finn. . .

 

Finn:

 

I know, I know. It was just an idea. But you're right, is a bad one. I just don't think anymore, haha.

 

Me:

 

It's okay, it's not a bad idea. Send me the address just in case.

 

I waited for a couple of minutes and then he sent me the address to his new place. I caressed my mini bump and then placed my phone in my nightstand. I lied on my bed and closed my eyes. I wiped the few dry tears on my cheek and then hugged my pillow, drifting to sleep.

 

Chapter 28 - Mean Girl

“So today, I was thinking in doing a mini project here in the class. And yes since I'm in a good mood today, you can choose your partners” Ms. Johnson said while writing the name of the work in the board, followed by all the people cheering. The project was called: ‘Getting to Know You’. Apparently she had no other ideas so she chose this. . .

 

“Hey, Gwen” Austin said, standing in front of my desk.

 

I smiled. “Hey Austin. How are you?” I asked.

 

He shrugged and casually put his hands inside his jean pockets. “Good, I guess. . .I was wondering if you would like to be my partner? I believe no one wants to be with me”

 

I giggled. “No one wants to be with you? Oh c'mon, they're dying to be on this project with you”

 

“How do you know?” he asked innocently.

 

“Well, judging by that bunch of girls around you, who are trying everything for you to notice them, I just guessed” I said, and he looked at his surroundings.

 

“Alright, honestly. . .I don't want to be with them, I want to be with you” he grinned.

 

“Umm, alright. . .Sit down next to me, partner” I said. He smiled and pulled a chair. I heard multiple girls sighing dreamily and some with pouts on their faces, it was actually kind of funny.

 

“Do you know what we have to do?” he asked, our legs brushing since the desk wasn't that big.

 

“Umm, we have to get to know each other some more and then make a report about our personalities. So, tell me about yourself” I said, and placed my elbows on top of the table.

 

We chatted about almost everything, while writing our answers. We finished it and gave it to the teacher very quickly. In fact, we were the first ones to turn it in. We talked for the rest of the class.

 

At lunch, I sat down at my usual spot, beside Dani. I was starving, so my tray was full of everything. I was talking to Dani about random things until I noticed some girls passing by, laughing and pointing at me, some glaring at me. Then I saw in another table, a bunch of girls and boys were looking at me with disapproval. I furrowed my eyebrows in confusion and then stared at my almost empty tray. Why are they looking at me so much?

 

“Oh my God, have you heard?” I heard two girls gossiping while staring at me. I exchanged looks with Dani, both of us frowning.

 

Just then, one of the worst girls in the whole school approached me. Meredith Winston. Pure evil, her hobby is watching others suffer. I always try to ignore her, which is the same thing she does with me. Why would I lose my time with someone who doesn't deserve it? With someone that never cared for others but herself? But today, she was walking towards me, a grin plastered across her full–of–makeup face.

 

“Hello there, Gwen” she smiled wickedly.

 

“What do you want, bitch? Can't you see we're trying to eat without puking thanks to your cheap perfume” Dani said.

 

She scoffed and put her hands on her hips. “It’s Channel”

 

“Is that what the man from the gas station told you? Oh, you poor thing” my best friend said and I couldn't help but laugh.

 

“Whatever. I didn't come for you, you disgusting waste of life. . .I came for you, Gwen. I just wanted to know how are you?”

 

“What do you care?” I asked.

 

“Oh, you know. . .Being pregnant and all. It must be so tough for you, darling” she said putting on an innocent face. I froze and my jaw almost dropped to the ground. Is that why everyone is looking at me with disapproval and disgust?

 

“What?” I choked.

 

“Yeah, the whole school knows that, your bump sure is growing. Who's the daddy though? Tell us, you slut?”

“Get the fuck out of here, Meredith. Who are you calling slut, huh? At least we didn't have sex with the whole football team. So you should be careful before you speak” Dani defended me.

 

“But am I pregnant? I. Don't. Think. So” she said with arms crossed.

 

“No, but you sure must have a lot of STD's. Am I right?”

 

“Shut up, Danielle, I'm not talking to you. . .” Meredith rolled her eyes and turned back to me, with a devilish smirk. “So, Gwen. . .Is it a boy or a girl?” she clapped her hands. I shook my head and some tears rolled down my cheek.

 

“Shut up!” I said. But she just laughed, the whole cafeteria laughed, and it was the worst thing ever. “Who told you?” I asked, my voice cracking. She smirked and checked her nails before folding her arms.

 

“You should be careful where you speak about this subject, someone might over hear”

 

I felt so vulnerable, so humiliated, so stupid. . .I didn't know what to say.

 

Meredith took a step towards our table and grabbed a handful of pasta, placing it on top of my head, followed by water from the glass beside my tray. “Sluts and whores like you don't deserve any respect”

 

Now, I was crying hard. Dani gasped and covered her mouth with both of her hands. I took out of my head the remains of the pasta and then stood up from the table, running out of the cafeteria. Dani called my name, but I heard how someone was saying ‘hold her up’, so they didn't allow her to come with me. But honestly, I just wanted to be alone. . .

 

I've never been so humiliated in my entire life. . .

 

• • •

 

I walked out of the main doors of my High School, covered in sticky food and embarrassment. It was horrible. . .Suddenly, I heard my name being called. I turned around just to see Austin. He came rushing to me, with a worried expression on his face.

 

“What was that about?” he asked.

 

“Haven't you heard the rumor? Well, is not a rumor, is actually the truth. . .I just–I just don't know why she humiliated me like that” I said as more tears kept rolling down my cheeks.

 

“That was true?” he asked. “You're actually pregnant?”

 

I nodded. “Go ahead, laugh, make fun of me, throw me a rock, I supposedly deserve it” I said.

 

“Gwen” he started while holding my hand, staring down at me, with his brown and beautiful eyes. “Nobody deserves to be treated that way. Pregnant or not. . .I won't make fun of you. Things like this happen. It’s okay” he said and hugged me. When we pulled away, he smiled sweetly at me.

 

“Do you want me to give you a ride to your house?” he asked. I nodded and he grabbed my hand, leading me to his car. I gave him my address and he started the engine, going out of the School's parking lot. The whole ride was silent, which I was very thankful for. I feel like if I speak, I would start crying. I knew that they would figure out sooner or later, I mean. . .My bump keeps getting bigger every day that passes. But I thought they would just let it go, I didn't know someone like Meredith would do something like this in front everyone. Now, the people who didn't know, already know, and the ones who heard the rumor, now confirmed it.

 

I am indeed pregnant. . .

 

• • •

 

When we got to my house, we didn't get out just yet. I tilt my head sideways and saw Austin staring at me, smiling. 

 

“I might be looking like such a mess” I chuckled, trying to lighten the mood.

 

“Nah, I think the pasta makes your eyes pop” he said jokingly, and that alone made me laugh, and it felt so good. “You have a beautiful laugh" he complimented, making me blush.

 

He started to lean in, until he reached my lips. And I don't know why but. . .I didn't stop him. He placed his hand on my thigh, sending me shivers since his hand was cold and I was wearing shorts. I caressed his cheek, but it didn't feel the same, nothing did. I don't know why I was kissing him in the first place. I just felt so desperate and lonely, and he was there, he didn't judge me, he was there. . .But that doesn't mean I have to kiss him. So I pulled away and looked at my fingers.

 

“I'm sorry, I just. . .I shouldn't have done that” he said, scratching the back of his head. I nodded and then met his gaze.

 

“I just. . .I like someone else” I admitted and he looked embarrassed for just a second. I placed my hand on his knee. “Thank you so much for not laughing at me, you're such a nice guy and I barely know you. But I know we can be great friends. . .But that's just if you're okay with it”

 

“Of course, look. . .I don't know why, but I just want to make you happy. So if being friends make you happy, then let's be friends" he said.

 

“Thank you, Austin” I said and got out. With one last wave at him, I got inside my house. I went directly to my shower, and didn't got out, even when I finished taking all that stuff out of my head and body. I was just so thoughtful and leaned my back in the wall, the water hitting my head. I closed my eyes briefly and caressed my growing bump.

 

When I got out, I dried my hair and then my body. I stared at myself in the mirror one second and tried to smile, but it was impossible. I had no strength or capacity of smiling in that situation. I'm scared of assisting school tomorrow. I will just tell mom to please let me stay, at least for one day. I just don't want to face all those people that are more against me than with me.

 

I put on a grey, loose shirt, so my stomach can breathe, I put on some yoga pants, and slippers. I untangled my wet hair and then braided it. I went to the fridge and stuffed my face with chocolate ice cream, I started watching Netflix, lying on the couch, my computer placed on top of the coffee table. Thank God, today they didn't assign any homework, I'm not in the mood to do that right now.

 

By the second movie, my eyelids got heavy until I couldn't hold it anymore and just closed them. I've been so tired lately and I just don't want to think anymore, I want to just sleep and not worry with all these amount of stuff that are suddenly part of my life.

Chapter 29 - Nothing seems Alright

“Gwen” I heard someone whispering my name and shaking me slightly. I groaned and tried to ignore it. “Gwen, wake up” the voice kept calling me. I opened one eye vaguely, just to see that it was Alec.

 

“What?” I groaned and closed my eyes again.

 

“Why don't you go to your bed?” he asked.

 

“Because I don't want to!” I snapped raising my voice and opening my eyes abruptly. I don't know what was that about, why was I in a bad mood? “Sorry” I apologized and then rubbed my forehead. “I don't know what was that. . .I guess I'm just very tired”

 

“Hey, umm. . .Dani told me what happened today” he said and hugged me. “Are you okay?”

 

“I really want to say yes” I said while pulling away from him. “But I'm not okay. . .Everyone knows, Alec. Everyone laughed at me, I just. . .I was alone and Dani tried to defend me, but shouldn't have. I should've been able to speak out, but I couldn't”

 

“Gwen, is alright. . .I'll tell mom and dad not to send you to school tomorrow, okay?” he said and kissed my cheek. I nodded and muttered a ‘thank you’. I sat back down at the couch and put a strand of hair behind my ear.

 

“If you need me, I'll be upstairs, okay? I have some homework to do” he said. I nodded and smiled. I let go a heavy sigh and lied back, staring at the ceiling, just thinking. . .About what? About everything. Finn, school, my family, this baby. . .Everything.

Chapter 30 - Maternity What!?

Gwen's P.O.V

 

The next day, I didn't assist school, which was good. Facing all those people is not something I really wanted to do at the moment; but I know I'll have to do it in some point. I just wish I didn't have to. . .

 

I stayed half of the morning in bed, staring at the ceiling. I grabbed my phone and scrolled down through twitter, just to kill time. I saw some videos of Finn on YouTube, and he is indeed pretty funny, so are his friends. Plus, they all are good looking. No wonder every girl dies for them. . .And that Shawn kid has a beautiful voice, I kind of like it. Well, I like it a lot. I've been I don't know how long here in bed, and I've listened to his songs like a million times; they're very catchy and his voice is very melodic.

 

When I gained strength to get out of bed, I placed my phone on top of my nightstand, and rubbed at my sleepy eyes. I yawned and then walked to the bathroom. Once I finished, I untangled my hair and decided to let it loose. I put on a very loose pastel pink dress, and wanted to look nice, so I applied light make up. Once done, I walked to my bedroom and grabbed my phone, to text Dani and see how's everything. Then I walked downstairs with a roaring stomach.

 

I just need coffee. . .I needed some caffeine to get through the day. So the first thing I did once I reached the kitchen was making myself some delicious coffee. While turning on the coffee machine, I saw one of the many notes of my parents saying they went to work. I shrugged it off, I was used to it, but my mom told me they would make some time in their tight agenda to spend time with us a.k.a their children. But I understand that their job is making them truly busy, and thanks to them, we have a proper house, food on our plates, and a roof on top of our heads. I will always love them, no matter their jobs. My mom is a reporter, and my dad is a doctor.

 

When my coffee was ready I took a sip and instantly felt much better. I ate some pancakes and then sat down at the kitchen table, sipping on my coffee, until something caught my attention. . .It was a pamphlet? I placed my coffee mug down and then grabbed the piece of paper.

 

“MooseHeart, Chicago's most prestigious Maternity Home for Teen Moms”

 

I furrowed my eyebrows in confusion as I started reading what's inside. To say I was shocked was the biggest understatement of my entire life. A maternity home? For teen moms? I didn't had to be so smart to know they referred to me. They want to send me away to Chicago?

 

What. The. Hell!?

 

I don't how I feel right now. . .I feel sad, angry, heavyhearted, I want to puke, I want to punch someone in the face. And I can't ask my brother about this since he's in College right now. I just want to get out of here, I feel like this walls are closing in on me. I stood up from the chair, finished my coffee, put my empty plate and coffee mug in the sink, and then went upstairs quickly to brush my teeth. Once done, I went downstairs and put a note in the fridge saying 'I need fresh air'. I grabbed my purse and then, I was out the door, not once looking back. I knew where I wanted to go, and if my parents or Alec figure it out, I'm sure they would ground me for life.

 

• • •

 

I checked Finn's address once more on my phone, and stood outside a very decent looking apartment. It was all painted in white, with huge windows, and a big terrace, with different plants and flowers in each one. I asked the receptionist about Finn Harries. She called the residence and I waited patiently. I put a strand of hair behind my ear, she smiled politely at me and told me I can go up.

 

I took the elevator and then went to his door. I rang the doorbell and moments later, heard someone's footsteps. Cameron opened the door, and he looked beyond confused. “Gwen, hey. . .What are you doing here?” he asked furrowing his eyebrows in confusion.

 

“I-I need to talk to Finn. Is he here?” I asked. He nodded and moved to the side so I can get in. There stood Finn, a shocking expression plastered all over his face.

 

“Gwen, hey” he said and walked towards me. “What's wrong, are you okay?”

 

“No, I'm not. . .I think-I think they want to take me away” I said. He stayed speechless, not moving, totally frozen.

 

“Guys, umm. . .You need privacy, I will just go to my room. Call if you need anything” he said. I nodded and sat in the couch.

 

“What do you mean they will take you away?” he asked sitting close to me. I wiped one tear that escaped my eyes. I hate crying, especially in front of someone. I just hate to be so emotional right now. But I can't help it. . .Every two seconds I feel like crying, but I need to be strong, or at least pretend.

 

“Don't cry” he said and caressed my cheek. I placed my head on his shoulder and he kissed my forehead. "Take a deep breath and then try to explain me”

 

I did as he said and it took me several seconds to be able to speak. Finn didn't say anything, he waited patiently.

"I woke up this morning and when I went downstairs. . .I found this pamphlet on top of the kitchen table"

He nodded and motioned for me to continue. “It was about a maternity home for teen moms in Chicago” I finally said. Finn stood up from the couch abruptly. He pierced his chocolate brown eyes with mine and crossed his arms across his chest, a combination of confusion and angriness was spread across his features.

“What!?” he asked, nearly screaming. I looked at him, I wanted to cry, but I had to hold it back.

“I know. . .I don't understand whose idea was to send me there. Imagine waking up to that” I sighed.

He nodded in agreement. “Where are your parents right now?” he asked.

“At work” I replied simply. “What am I going to do?” I asked mostly to myself. I don't want to go to Chicago. I don't need to go to a maternity home. . .

“Everything will be alright” he said and sat again. He placed his arm around my shoulder and hugged me. I felt slightly better with just his warm touch. Suddenly, I heard footsteps. I looked up to see Hayden holding a little girl. He furrowed his eyebrows in confusion as he let this blonde girl in the ground.

“Gwen, what are you doing here?” he asked.

 

“I had some things to talk to Finn. . .But I was just leaving” I said and stood up, so did Finn.

 

“Stay some more, I know you shouldn't, but. . .I'm sure you don't want to go back home just yet, right?” Finn said while soothingly rubbing my back.

 

“No, I guess not” I said honestly. The little girl kept looking at me, with her very tiny green eyes.

 

“Who are you?” she asked, her voice so soft.

“I'm Gwen, Finn's friend” I answered, smiling at this cute blonde little girl.

 

“I'm Skyler, nice to meet you!” she said, giggling.

 

I chuckled. “So, you're the famous Skyler, huh?” I said and kneeled down to be to her level, struggling because of the bump. “Nice to meet you too” she smiled widely and grabbed my hand shaking it. We all laughed as Finn picked her up and placed a kiss on her cheek, which was adorable.

 

“So great you both got to meet” he said and I nodded in agreement.

 

“You guys don't look alike” I said confused.

 

“Skyler is our half-sister, our parents are divorced” Hayden explained.

 

“I'm so sorry, I shouldn't have said anything” I am such an idiot, for real though. . .

 

Finn chuckled and placed Skyler on his couch. “Nah, don't worry about it. . .We're used to it, they got divorced a long time ago. Besides, Skyler is our sister, no matter if she's not our blood sister, and I love her more than anything on this world”

 

“We both love her, Finn” Hayden corrected his older brother while crossing his arms across his chest.

 

“Whatever. She loves me more” Finn said.

 

“Nah-ah, that's such a lie" Hayden said. Then they both turned to Skyler.

 

“Sky, who's your favorite brother?” Finn asked and sat beside Skyler.

 

“Finny!” she said. Which made me laugh so hard. Then she grabbed Hayden hand and took him to another room. I couldn't stop giggling as I heard Hayden’s complains about Skyler's favoritism. I turned to Finn who was smiling widely. I sat down on the couch and he sat next to me.

 

“She's adorable” I commented and he nodded in agreement, placing his arm around my shoulder. His face only mere inches from mine, our breaths mixing. He leaned in, closing his eyes. I exchanged looks from his eyes to his lips, and then closed my eyes too, waiting for this kiss to happen.

 

His mouth connected with mine, and I felt much better. It wasn't so long; it was enough just to make me float in the clouds. We looked into each other's eyes, never breaking once our gaze. That until my stupid phone had to ruin that perfect moment. I took my phone out of my purse and checked who's texting me. It was Alec.

 

Alec:

 

Where are you? I need to talk to you.

 

I quickly typed a reply.

 

Me:

 

You don't need to know always where I am. What do you want to talk about?

 

Alec:

 

I know you have read that pamphlet, please come back home. . .

 

Me:

 

Did you know about that?

 

Of course I'm sure he knew about this, he is the older child after all, and he always figures everything going on in our family before me, since he's older and sometimes I'm treated like a child. Is so annoying. . .

I don't want to go back home, but I know I have to or else my parents will flip. I won't tell him I'm in Finn's house, that would devastate them, although I shouldn't care. . .They don't care if I go to live far away, perhaps because I just became a problem to them since this baby will give troubles. But still they should've told me they were looking for maternity homes.

 

My phone buzzed again, so I quickly checked it.

 

Alec:

 

Come home, I'll explain, I swear.

 

Just when I was about to reply, he sent me another text.

 

Alec:

 

You aren't hanging out with Finn, aren't you?

 

Me:

 

It’s none of your business with who I hang out. . .And I'll go home when I want to go home.

Alec:

What happened to you? You're not my little sister. Is that jerk brain washing you?

Me:

 

Shut up Alec! Nobody brain washed me, and I would appreciate if you could stop calling him that, you're getting on my nerves.

 

I hate fighting with him, but he needs to understand that he doesn't have to be on my business or with who I'm hanging out, or what am I doing. It is so annoying, and I don't care if he has good intentions, I just want to be with Finn and he's making it hard. But I do believe that if I don't go home, Finn will surely be in troubles, not only me. And the last thing I want is to Alec make a scene, he is capable of finding out where Finn lives, and if he does figure it out, everything will be much more complicated than already is. . .

 

He didn't reply after that, and I didn't want to keep going with that conversation. I deserve an explanation and I will go home when I feel like going. I'm not a baby, I'm 17, and he should start treating me like that. I love him, I truly do, but sometimes he behaves as my dad, and I hate it.

 

I placed the phone back in my purse and then turned to Finn, who was staring at me with a confused expression. “Is everything okay?” he asked. I nodded slowly, and he looked at me suspiciously.

 

“It was just Alec, telling me to go home” I sighed. He gave me a peck on the lips all of a sudden, and I thought it was pretty cute. He rested his forehead against mine and kissed my nose.

 

“Are you going?” he whispered.

 

I shrugged. “I seriously don't want to, but at the same time I want answers as to why they want to send me away”

 

He nodded and then pulled away. “Do you want me to take you?” he offered. I nodded and we both stood up. He grabbed my hand all the way to his car, and it was so sweet, I love feeling his warm touch. I don't understand how I never saw it before. I want to be with Finn. . .

Chapter 31 - A Tight Knot in my Stomach

When Finn dropped me off, I felt a tight knot in my stomach as I stared at my house, imagining all of the things that could happen once I cross the main doors. I figured I won't get any answers if I just stand here arms crossed, outside in our driveway. So I took long strides towards the entrance, embracing myself to what is about to come.

 

I cautiously opened the door and walked inside. The first thing I saw was my big brother sitting on the couch, my parents beside him. I closed the door and walked towards them. I crossed my arms across my chest, and didn't say anything, they should be the first ones to speak, not me.

 

“Gwen, could you please sit down?” my dad asked motioning to the couch across from them. I shook my head no and stayed where I was.

 

“I'm good standing up, thank you” I said coldly. My mom let go a heavy sigh and then exchanged looks with my dad.

 

“Sweetie, I know you've been wondering why there was that pamphlet on the kitchen table” she said and fidgeted with her fingers. I nodded, glaring at my family. “We can explain”

 

“Yes, because that's what I want to hear. . .Why are you taking me to a maternity home, huh? Am I a problem to you? Do you want me to go away?”

 

“What? No? Gwen, of course not!" my mom said and stood up from the couch, quickly reaching me. She gave my shoulders a little squeeze. "It was an option. We just-we just thought you could need some help. It’s a lot of responsibility to have a baby, and even more when you're just 17”

 

“I will need help, but not from strangers. And as the pamphlet said, that thing is in Chicago. I want my family, I want your support, this is already hard for me”

 

“We never wanted to make you feel like you were trouble. We love you so, so, so much. And it was just an option, is not like it was decided” she said. I stared at them suspiciously.

 

“We won't send you away” my brother reassured me. “Do you think I would let them take you away from me?” he smiled, which made me smile too. It is true, perhaps he can be so annoying sometimes; but if there's something I know, is that Alec would never let anyone separate us.

 

“I'm so sorry if you thought that you could be a trouble to us” my dad said. I looked down at the ground, I'm just so tired right now I don't want to deal with this. . .But I feel like I have to be in a constant war with my family, is exhausting. I nodded, not wanting to discuss it anymore. I was still a little hurt, even if it was just a suggestion. They were considering in sending me away.

 

I turned on my heels to leave, but Alec quickly grabbed my arm, locking his gaze to mine. I frowned, confused at his sudden move. He cleared his throat and then exchanged looks with my parents who had a confused expression on their faces.

 

“Where were you before you came here?” he asked, using that interrogative tone I came to hate so much.

 

“Nowhere” I replied too quickly, and I just wanted to face palm myself so badly. Alec kept looking at me, still waiting for me to say the truth, although like I said before, he shouldn't be getting on my business.

 

“Tell me” he demanded.

 

“No” I said, frowning. He can't demand me anyway. . .

 

“Sweetie, please, where were you?” my mom butted in.

 

I guess they can demand me. . .Great.

 

“Oh, I was doing some drugs two blocks away, you know mom, the typical stuff” I said sarcastically.

 

“Gwen” she said seriously. “This is not a joke. Where were you?”

 

And now all of their eyes were on me, and I've never been so nervous. I have two options here and unfortunately, two consequences.

 

I can either tell the truth, and get punish for it. Or, lie and stay here to keep going with the interrogation.

 

Any of those options will make me lose. And the plan of just running out of the house, escape the country, and change my name, is not a good move right now.

 

“Where you with him?” my mom interrupted my thoughts.

 

“N-no” I stuttered, but it seemed like they didn't buy it.

 

“Don't lie to me, Gwen. . .Don't even try” Alec said. I don't know where to hide, I just want to be swallowed by the ground and vanish away from everything, everyone. There's no way I can get out of this without needing to spill out all the truth. This sucks. . .

 

“You don't need to know with who I am or what I'm doing. . .This is my life!” I said raising my voice.

 

“Fuck, we know is your life, but we're part of it. We have all the right to know with who the fuck you are. . .You are my sister and their daughter. So stop being a child and grow the fuck up!”

 

I stared at my brother in shock, so did my parents. I never heard him cursing that much in front of them. Ever.

He let go a heavy sigh, realizing what he did. “Where you with him?”

 

“Yes” I said almost inaudible. I bit my bottom lip nervously.

 

“I told you not to see him, and yet you disobeyed me” my mom said while rubbing her forehead, her face full of disappointment. And this was what I wanted to avoid in the first place, but I knew that I would have to deal with it sooner or later.

 

“But mom—”

 

“No, Gwen. I told you to stay away from him, that he was not good for you, I mean. . .Just look what he did to you” she said motioning to my stomach. “He made your life 100x more complicated"

 

"It was my mistake too, and I saw him because I needed to. He's a very sweet guy, but you won't know that unless you meet him”

 

“No, we don't want to meet him" my father butted in. "The last thing we want is to talk to the one that made you pregnant”

 

“But—”

 

“No buts Gwen. Please, just, go to your room”

 

And that's exactly what I did. Quiet and with my face looking at the ground. The fact I just wanted to get out of there and I couldn't stand to see their faces anymore, it gave me the enough strength to move towards the stairs.

 

I feel awful but at the same time, I expected this reaction. I knew they would be disappointed; I knew they would be mad that I'm hanging with the father of a baby I shouldn't have at this age. I knew that it was the worst idea.

 

I lied down on my bed, staring at the ceiling, which I've been doing a lot lately. I thought about this baby, how it affected my relationship with my family. . .

 

I've never argued this much with them ever. We're usually really close. But lately I feel like I always need to prepare myself to go to war with them. I hate this, I hate everything my life had turned into only because of that one-night stand, because of that single moment of irresponsibility. Now, I have to accept the consequences that came with it.

 

I closed my eyes, totally exhausted, and didn't wake up for a long time. Part of me wishes everything is just a cruel nightmare, that I will wake up and everything would be back to normal. But the realistic part of me, knows that everything is real, I will wake up, and nothing will change. My real nightmare will still go on. . .

 

God, please help me. . .

 

Chapter 32 - Are you. . .Jealous?

The next day, unfortunately, I had to go to school, no excuses. . .I woke up like I normally do, except that I was suffering a tremendous neck pain; perhaps I slept in a bad position last night. Talking of which, I didn't even eat, huge mistake. Now, I was having a growling stomach. But what was I supposed to do in that situation, huh? I mean, it was pretty clear that my family didn't wanted to see my face.

 

When I changed into my normal clothes, I didn't waste my time with make-up, so I just didn't apply any, I'm going to go natural. And the worst part, is that whenever I go without make-up, I start getting self-conscious. I feel the pimples in my forehead, the bags under my eyes, and without the mascara, my eyes look like they're closing little by little. But then, I stared at myself in the mirror, and I'm totally fine. My mind is playing tricks with me.

 

I walked downstairs cautiously, scanning at my surroundings in search of my parents or brother. I saw my mom, giving her back to me, she was doing the dishes. My dad was reading the newspaper, sipping on his coffee mug. And my brother was using the phone. Everything seemed so normal, like if yesterday never happened.

 

I got inside the kitchen, bracing myself just in case they say something. My mom turned around and locked gazes with mine.

 

“Gwen—”

 

Here we go. . .

 

“Would you like scrambled eggs?” she asked. I furrowed my eyebrows in confusion. This was not at all what I expected. Weird. . .I nodded and then took a seat beside Alec, not once looking at me. I suppose he's just ignoring me, and that is so unlike him. Even if we fight sometimes, he would always speak to me, or wish me a good day, or ask me something randomly, never chose that ignoring and not speaking option.

 

We all ate quietly, and it couldn't be more awkward. I placed my fork and knife down and my family looked at me. “I'll go to school” I informed and stood up, not looking back. I grabbed my backpack from the ground and slung it on my shoulder. I opened the door and let go a heavy sigh. “Bye” I said and closed it behind me.

 

I started walking towards my school, thinking of all the things they will tell me once I step a foot in there. I mean, they already know my secret, I'm pregnant. And they laughed, they might be thinking I'm some kind of slut. Perhaps they're betting who's the father. I just want to hid in a hole and never come out.

 

But I knew that that would be impossible. . .

 

When I got to the main door of my school, I received multiple looks from nearly everyone there. I hold my chest briefly, and took a deep breath.

 

I can do it, I thought to myself. But deep inside, I knew something would go wrong, I just knew it. But I also knew I couldn't be a coward forever. So I put my chin up and tried to look as confident as possible, but the truth is. . .I'm shaking inside.

 

A group of girls were frowning while passing me by, some were commenting while looking down at my stomach. A few guys smirked at me, some other girls giggled among themselves. And suddenly I felt the need to vomit.

“Gwen, there you are!” Dani said and rushed towards me. “I've been trying to call you last night and this morning. . .”

 

“Sorry, I was so exhausted last night. I had this fight with my family”0 I said and walked directly to my locker.

“Really? What happened?” she asked, with a shocked expression plastered across her face.

 

“Apparently, they were thinking in sending me to a maternity home in Chicago” I said, a shiver running down my back with the simple memory.

 

She gasped. “What!? I can't believe it! Please tell me you're joking”

 

“Relax, I'm not going after all, it was just an ‘option’, but I'm still hurt that my own family was considering in send me there”

 

“Hey girls” Austin said while standing beside Dani. I opened my mouth to say something but I closed it again. We kissed a couple days ago and it seems like things didn't vanish away just yet. Yup, this is still awkward. . .

 

“I just wanted to give you the notes from yesterday, since-since you didn't come” he said scratching the back of his head nervously. I grabbed the papers and smiled gratefully.

 

“Thank you, Austin, that's so thoughtful” I said and closed my locker door. I put the notes inside my bag and then turned my attention back to them.

 

“Anyway, I have to get to class. . .I'll see you guys later?” he said while casually putting his hands inside his jean pockets. Both Dani and I nodded. He grinned and turned on his heels to leave.

 

“Hey, I actually wanted to reach you since you know. . .What happened in school the other day” she said putting a strand of hair behind her ear. I nodded and forced a smile, I seriously don't want to remember that. It was awful.

 

“Yeah, I-I just had to leave you know; what Meredith did was horrible. I've never been so humiliated” I said. Dani nodded in agreement and put her arm around my shoulder, hugging me sideways.

 

“I'm still here, right?” she smiled sweetly.

 

“Thank God, if you weren't here with me, I would've gone mad already”

 

Just then, the bell rang, letting us know we should hurry to our next class. So we walked together, and I tried to ignore all the looks I received from multiple people. I just want to graduate already and get out of this hell hole.

 

• • •

 

I felt something hit the back of my head. I furrowed my eyebrows in confusion as I turned around to see that someone had thrown me a paper ball. I picked it up and opened it.

 

Hello baby mama. xoxoxo

 

I rolled my eyes and threw it in the trash can. I stared at the guys that wrote me the note, they started winking and sending kisses. I shook my head and sat back down. I can't believe how immature people can be.

 

A classmate whispered something in Mr. Brown's ear and she turned around. She nodded at the girl, and then she looked straight at me. “Um, Gwen?” she called my attention.

 

“Y-yes?” I asked.

 

“They need you at the Principal's office” he informed me, followed by all my classmates saying multiple ‘ohhhhh’ and gossiping. I rolled my eyes and stood up, wondering why they need me there. They have never called me to the Principal's office. Ever. . .

 

I stood up from my desk slowly, and grabbed my bag from the floor. I walked towards the exit and gave the class one last glance before turning on my heels to leave. The hallways were quiet as everyone was in class. Well, except the typical students that were always skipping, those were probably smoking outside and writing fake excuses from their 'parents'.

 

I knocked on the Principal's door, waiting for a response. “Come on in” I heard her say. I took a long breath before walking in.

 

“Gwen” she said and put the phone down. “Please, sit down”

 

I did as he said and put a strand of hair behind my ear. I stayed quiet and waited for her to say something as to why I'm sitting here.

 

“So” she started. “How are you doing?”

 

“Umm” was I supposed to just chill with her or something? “I-I don't know. With all the respect, I just want to know why am I here since, you know. . .I've never been to this office before. Why now?”

 

“Well, I'm very glad you asked. Darling, a classmate of yours have come to me, saying you were. . .Uhh, that you were pregnant” she said and stood up. “And I can't believe I haven't noticed before”

 

“But I—”

 

“Gwen. . .You're one of the best students in this entire school, your conduct grade is splendid, you're in High Honors. I honestly didn't think this could've happened to you. . .At all" she said crossing her arms across her chest.

 

“I seriously don't want to talk about it, I'm truly sorry” I said and stood up. “Is already enough that I had to talk about it with my family, they are disappointed, I can see that. And there's nothing that breaks my heart more than to see my own family angry or even sad at anything. I know this is not the ‘behavior’ you want in your school, but I couldn't help it. Aren't I a teenager? Aren't I supposed to experiment or something?”

 

“Sweetie, I understand, believe me. . .I was a teenager myself. But what I'm worried about is your future. I just want the best for you, Gwen. I want to know what you plan to do, if you have thought of something. Do you know how many Colleges were talking about you already? And how much they want you with them? I just want to know what is your plan?”

 

“That's the thing, Principal Edwards. . .I don't have a plan; as I said before, I'm a teenager. A teenager that made a stupid mistake and had to pay for it. A teenager that can't stop getting emotional for everything lately” I said and quickly wiped away a tear that escaped my eyes. God, I hate crying in public.

 

Principal Edwards walked towards me and hugged me. It was such a weird feeling, but I hugged her back; I just needed some comfort. “Is okay to cry, Gwen. You've been strong enough” she said and pulled away.

 

I nodded. “I'm–I'm just. . .I'm just scared of everything. . .I'm clueless, and–and I can't do this on my own”

 

“But you have your family”

 

“I know. And I'm thankful that I still have them with me. I don't want them to be mad or go crazy because of me” I said and looked down at the ground.

 

“They love you, and I'm sure they will always be there to support you. You're their daughter remember?” I brought my gaze up and met hers. She smiled sweetly at me, which made me smile back. “Hey, why don't you go home, huh? Go get some rest. . .I will tell your teachers, alright?” she said. I nodded and turned on my heels to leave.

 

“Oh, and Gwen?”

 

I turned around to face her. “If you ever want to talk, about anything. . .My doors are always open” she said. I nodded and walked out of her office.

 

I took out my phone, ready to call Alec for a ride. But then I remembered that he might be in College right now. And my parents might be at work. Plus, I'm sure they won't talk to me. So I started dialing Finn's number.

 

I know you might be thinking I'm stupid for doing that, but I just had to. . .I want to see him, no matter what my family says about him.

 

He picked up on the third ring. “Hello?”

 

“Remember me?” I asked and leaned my back on a locker door.

 

He giggled at the other side of the line. “How can I ever forget someone so beautiful like you? Is everything alright, why are you calling?”

 

“I hope I'm not bothering you” I said and scratched the back of my head.

 

“No! Of course not. . .I'm just wondering if everything is alright”

 

“Yeah, uhh, I just–I was just wondering if you weren't too busy, because I needed a ride”

 

“Of course I will give a ride, babe. What kind of question is that? Where are you?” he asked.

 

“I'm in my school right now, I'll text you the address, alright?” I said.

 

“Sure, see you in five” he said and hung up. I started texting him the address and waited patiently in the parking lot. Suddenly I felt a light tap on my shoulder, which made me jump slightly. I tilt my head sideways just to see Austin, smiling at me.

 

“Hi” I said simply.

 

“Hey” he replied simply. “Were you crying?”

 

“N–no, I just—”

 

“Why are you crying, did someone said something to you? Just tell me who did” he said, and I sensed some anger in his voice.

 

“No! No, no one told me anything, I just came from the Principal's office, we just talked a little bit, and well. . .Lately I've been kind of emotional, so some tears escaped. But no one did anything to me today, besides just gossiping and laugh. But well, I'm alright” I explained.

 

“Why are you going home?” he asked.

 

“Principal Edwards thought that it would be better if I take some rest. Why are you here outside? You should be in classes” I said furrowing my eyebrows in confusion. He followed me outside of the school, and we entered the parking lot.

 

“There was this important call I had to take, and so I came here. Plus, I was in History, you understand” he said which made me laugh.

 

“That bad?” I asked while putting my hands on my hips.

 

“Mr. Philips was explaining the Revolution using puppets, I just had to get out of there before I could go insane” he said frowning which made me laugh.

 

“Gwen, hey” I heard Finn from behind me. I turned around just to see him standing there, with his hands casually inside his jean pockets, using just a plain white shirt, his blue eyes more sparkling than ever. I smiled with just the sight of him, is it weird that I missed him like crazy?

 

“Finn!” I said and jumped in his arms.

 

“Who is this?” he asked motioning at Austin.

 

“He's Austin, don't you remember him from the party we've been to weeks ago?”

 

“Oh, right, yeah, sorry. . .” he chuckled.

 

“Finn Harries, nice to see you again” he said and extended his hand for Finn to shake it, which he did. There was an awkward silence before I cleared my throat, which brought both of their attentions back to me.

 

“We better go now. I'll see you tomorrow, Austin” I said. He nodded and leaned in and hugged me. I was taken aback by it, but I quickly hugged back.

 

“Okay then. . .” Finn said while grabbing my arm, pulling me away from Austin. "Have a good life, Justin”

 

“Is actually Austin” he corrected him.

 

“Right, Austin. . .Sorry, bye” he said and dragged me to his car.

 

“What was that all about” I asked furrowing my eyebrows in confusion.

 

“What? I thought you wanted to leave already”

 

“I kind of think you were jealous that he hugged me” I said smirking. He instantly met my gaze and took a step towards me.

 

“Should I be jealous?” he asked while placing his hand on my cheek. I missed his touch so much.

 

“No, you shouldn't. . .”

 

“Because you're mine”

 

“Who said I was yours?” I asked teasingly.

 

“I did” he gave me a peck on the lips, and rested his forehead against mine. I closed my eyes, savoring the moment. God, how is that we literally saw each other a couple of days ago and I'm so excited to be here with him like if I haven't seen him like in two years?

 

“You're my princess, and I will do everything to make you happy. And yes, if I'm honest with you, I was jealous that he hugged you. I thought: He's way hotter than me”

 

I giggled and opened my eyes just to see his blue eyes looking down at me. “No one is hotter than you, Finn. And I won't go with another guy, because I want to be right here, with you”

 

“You do know how to make someone feel better” he kissed my cheek.

 

“I was going to say the same thing to you” I let go a heavy sigh.

 

“Hard day?”

 

“Hard week” I replied and opened the passenger's car door. He went to the driver's seat and started the engine.

“Everything gets better” he said.

 

“Yeah? When?” I asked as I buckled in the seatbelt.

 

“You don't know when, but it does, in some point when you least expect it, everything turns out to be good” he winked at me and drove outside of the School's parking lot.

 

Chapter 33 - It Doesn't matter Where you are, but with who you're With

“Finn, where are we going? This is not the way to my house” I said and furrowed my eyebrows in confusion. I stared at Finn who was just smiling, not looking at me. “Is this the time you tell me you're secretly a serial killer and you will cut off my face and wear it as a mask?” I asked jokingly.

 

He laughed. “I'm not that weird, Gwen”

 

“There's always a possibility”

 

“Nah, you're just watching too many scary movies. Because I'm pretty sure you took that whole idea from that killer called ‘Leather Face’”

 

I laughed along with him as he took a turn, then glanced at me for a brief moment, offering a small smile. “We're just going to go somewhere to eat, alright? You seem stressed and I want to make you have a good time”

 

“Well that's sweet” I smiled. I understand why Alec hates him to the guts, but if they could just sit down for a good two hours, they would get along just fine. But of course I know there is no way Alec could agree to talk to Finn. They will most likely kill each other.

 

“Sweet is my middle name” he smirked.

 

“Sure thing, Finn Sweet Harries” I rolled my eyes. Minutes passed and he parked the car. After he killed the engine, he went out of the car and put on his black ray bans, then walked to my side to open my door for me. He grabbed my hand and we walked inside this small but very nice looking Cafe. The smell of Cinnamon and Peppermint soon hit my nostrils. The smell of baked bread made my mouth water, and made my stomach growl.

 

“This is my favorite place in all L.A.” he said and lead me to one of the tables. I nodded and scanned my surroundings, it is such a really nice place.

 

“So, what do you want to order?” he asked while grabbing the menu. I shrugged and moved closer to Finn to see the options more clearly. He approached this closeness and placed a soft kiss on top of my head.

 

I smiled and looked up at him, I gave him a peck on his lips. "I missed you today" I said truthfully.

 

“Aw, babe” he said and put his arm around my shoulder. “I never really thought you would ever say that. . .I mean, it seemed like you would hate me forever”

 

“I got to know you better and realized that you are sweet”

 

“So I'm not an asshole anymore, am I?” he grinned and pinched my cheek softly.

 

I giggled. “Well, is too early to say that, isn't it?” I asked while crossing my arms across my chest.

 

“Hey!” he whined with a pout on his face. “You’re mean!”

 

“You are such a little kid” I shook my head, but couldn't help the smile that crept to my lips. He looked so cute with his hair all messy, his dimples showing with every smile he offers, and the way his eyes are always sparkling, making your knees go weak. He doesn't even need to try and you would go crazy for him. I never thought I would be in love with this boy. We haven't told each other that, I don't even know if he feels the same way. I hope he loves me, which I'm not so sure. I don't know why am I overthinking this. So what if he doesn't love me? Is not the end of the world, right? Or is it? Dammit, my head hurts. I just know that I love hanging out with him, and I know I said I hated him. . .But something about Finn made me forget my hatred towards him and was able to replace it by love, by compassion, by everything. . .

 

“Whatever. So, what do you want? You can order anything though, my treat”

 

“Wow. You're in gentleman mode today. . .I like it”

 

“Princesses like you should be treated properly” he said in his typical northern accent. I smiled, almost getting lost in those eyes.

 

Just when I was going to reply, something—more like someone—caught my attention. My parents. Crap. Frick. Unbelievable. You have got to be kidding me. This is a joke. Maybe I'm dreaming. Perhaps they won't be mad to see me with the only guy they forbid me to see. Nope, I'm dead. . .

 

“You know what? I'm–I'm not hungry anymore. Let's go!” I said grabbing his arm ready to leave, but he didn't even budge.

 

He smiled cheekily. “Gwen, I can hear your stomach from here, anyone can easily confuse that sound with Chewbacca” he chuckled.

 

“You don't understand—”

 

And then he saw to his right, his eyes widened and jaw tightened. “Fuck” he muttered under his breath and stood up. “How mad do you think they would be to see you with the guy they forbid you to be with?”

 

Yup, I love this guy. . .

 

“Mad enough to kill me. Of course, they will kill you first and then probably dance on your grave, Alec would spit at your stone, and then they will set it on fire. But that's just a guess”

 

“You are so not helping” Finn said while rubbing his temples. He grabbed my hand and dragged me outside. “I can't believe the only place I want to take you, they're here. . .”

 

“I know, talk about bad luck” I let go a heavy sigh.

 

“This is horrible, I really wanted to go on a date with you, we never had an official one, and that sucks. . .”

 

“Oh, so this was a date, huh? You know what? Don't worry. If we're together, nothing can go wrong. . .” 

 

He smiled. “So, we can even go to McDonald's and you would be okay with that?”

 

“Are you kidding!? It would've been more than okay. . .We should've gone there in the first place” I said which made him laugh.

 

“You're amazing” he said and put his arm around my shoulder.

 

And that's exactly where we went, McDonald's. You'd think is kind of pathetic to go to McDonald's for a date, but not to me. In fact, it was the best date I have ever have. Well, Finn kept complaining how that wasn't a proper place to take me as a date. But it doesn't matter. . .I still had a good time. Because you know what? I don't need fancy restaurants, or a very nice five stars Cafe, or a bouquet of flowers. All I need is to be with the one I like, and everything is going to be okay.

 

Believe me, I had more fun hanging out with Finn in McDonald's than sitting in that Cafe, or sitting in a restaurant. It doesn't matter where you are, it maters with who you are. I was having a blast with Finn, hearing his jokes or him talking about his life, or when he put two fries in his nose, it was so funny when he realized the amount of salt they had.

 

I had fun with him, and that's all what counts. . .

Chapter 34 - We are just Friends

Finn was taking me home, one hand on the steering wheel, and the other one holding my hand. “Thanks Finn, for taking me out. I really needed to clear my head” I said while giving his hand a squeeze. He glanced at me and send me a smile.

 

“Of course, I'm so glad we got to hang out, even if it was at McDonald's” he chuckled and shook his head.

 

“Are you kidding? Best Quarter Pounder ever!” I stared briefly outside the window before turning back to him. "So, when are you guys leaving L.A.? It's been awhile”

 

“I didn't tell you? I thought I did. . .We actually live here”

 

“Really?”

 

“Yeah, we will get an apartment and everything”

 

I shook my head. We got to my house and Finn turned to look at me. I smiled cheekily at him and lean in to kiss his cheek, but he surprised me by moving his head, making me kiss his lips. I pulled away quickly, totally surprised.

 

“I was kissing in you in the cheek because is cute, and you just want to make out?” I said jokingly, making a pout.

 

“I'm a guy, Gwen. . .What were you expecting, huh?” he said and rested his forehead against mine. “Besides, you want to be cute, or you want to be pleased for real? I can offer you both feelings, but I believe is better to be more passionate here” he said and pecked on my lips.

 

I nodded. “I agree to that too” I said and wrapped my arms around his neck, pulling him towards my lips once again. He didn't hesitate, he just kissed me with all his strength. He rested his hand gently on my knee and started caressing it. He smiled into the kiss, so did I. When we pulled away, we both stared into each other's eyes.

 

“You're beautiful”

 

I let go a heavy sigh. “Don't lie to me, please. I'm not beautiful, in fact. . .I look like a freaking scarecrow right now. I have messy hair, bags under my eyes, and probably pimples”

 

“That's what makes you beautiful” he said kissing my nose. “You're natural”

 

That made me smile for real in what seemed for so long, and he's the only one capable of making me feel that way. I've been having such a horrible week. With fights, drama, tears, lies. . .And I just spend a few minutes with Finn, and is like I've had the most beautiful week ever. He makes me happy in so many ways. And I still don't understand how is it that just a few weeks ago, I hated him to my guts. Now, I'm here, in his car, kissing him, and hearing him telling me that I'm beautiful.

 

Life is so unpredictable; I just don't understand it anymore. . .

 

“Bye” I said and got out. I walked to my door and opened it. I went directly to the couch and started watching TV. I should probably start with Homework, but I had absolutely no energy to do it. This is like seriously the first time I don't do Homework before anything.

 

I was flipping through the channels, annoyed since there wasn't anything good to watch. But then again, I am indeed pregnant, and that might make me moody. I feel happy, sad, angry; that reminds me of those terrible five days when I was being with my period. . .Man, that was pure torture.

 

I heard footsteps coming down the stairs, I glanced up and saw Alec walking towards me. “Hey” he said timidly.

 

“Hey”

 

“The principal called”

 

“So?” I asked.

 

“I just wanted to know if you're feeling alright? You know. . .With this pregnancy thing”

 

“I'm fine, really. . .”

 

He nodded and walked towards the door. “I'll go out with Dani. Please don't burn the house while I'm gone”

 

I chuckled. “I don't make promises” I replied jokingly. He shook his head and smiled, laughing briefly before turning on his heels to leave.

 

I touched my bump, caressing it delicately. It felt such weird feeling. . .It was so, complicated. I wanted to cry, to smile, to laugh, all at the same time. I know perhaps I might be going mad, having all of this feelings for a little person growing inside of me. I never thought I would have to go through this type of things, or fighting this much with my family, or perhaps starting to have all these emotions for Finn Harries. My life had turned into something so weird, I just don't know anymore. . .

 

I felt so tired that I turned off the TV and went straight to my bed. I let the covers embrace me, the same way I did when I was a little kid and was scared of something, I would hide under them and feel safe all of a sudden.

 

I closed my eyes, and let the sleep consume me completely.

 

• • •

 

I heard this annoying sound, which made me wake up. I groaned and turned the other way around, I'm too exhausted to actually wake up. But the sound came coming, so I vaguely got out of bed and realized it was my phone in my nightstand. I rolled my eyes annoyed, asking who could possibly be. I grabbed it and then checked the caller ID.

 

Austin.

 

Crap. . .

 

What can he possibly want?

 

I was hesitating, debating if I should press answer or not. . .He might just want to chat, and I ignore him he will think that I'm avoiding him. Which is probably true, but he can't know that. . .

 

I shook my head and decided to answer. “Hello?”

 

“Hey Gwen” he said cheerily.

 

“What's up?”

 

“Just wanted to see how were you doing? I mean, you did get out of school early. . .”

 

“I'm fine, I promise, I just talked to the principal about this pregnancy thing and well, yeah I left”

 

“Really? And how are you feeling?”

 

“Honestly? Like crap” I said which made me laugh.

 

“Anyway, I'm sorry if I'm bothering you right now, but I truly wanted to hang out with you. . .”

 

I don't want to, but I feel like if I deny he might think that things are still awkward between us and that I am doing the impossible to ignore him. But I'm tired too. . .And also don't want to sound like a lazy ass. God, this is hard.

 

“Umm—”

 

“It’s alright, you know? I-I can call—”

 

“I was going to say that I would love to hang out with you” the words blurted out of my mouth before I stop to think.

 

“Really!? Awesome! I'll go by your house in like. . .Is okay fifteen minutes?”

 

“Sure” I sighed, but a smile crept to my lips, his happiness contagious.

 

“Perfect, see you in a bit!” he said and hung up. I let go a heavy sigh and leaned my head on the headboard. I stared at the ceiling, lost in thought. I don't want to go out, I'm too tired for that. But it would be nice to go out with him; I mean, we are friends after all.

Chapter 35 - A not-so Romantic Way

15 minutes later—like Austin had confirmed—I heard a loud horn outside at my driveway. I quickly grabbed my purse and rushed outside. There stood him, leaned on his car with arms folded. He was wearing and red t-shirt from Gap, khaki pants, ray ban sunglasses, and his dark blonde hair was messy with the typical I-don't-care look, but that he can rock out perfectly.

 

He grinned when his gaze fell on me. “Hey there, someone is looking great”

 

I laughed. “Really? I believe those dark sunglasses don't allow you to see very well”

 

“Oh come on, I was being nice, that loose gray shirt and sports pants look damn good”

 

“Thanks” I replied sarcastically. He opened the door for me so I could get in. I buckled in while he was entering the driver's seat. When we got out of my driveway, he turned on the radio. The sweet melody of the song: Sad Song by We the King started feeling the car.

 

“So” I started, fidgeting with my fingers. He acts like the kiss never happened, and I hate it that I can't stop thinking about it. I mean, I don't even know why I let it happen in the first place. “Where are we going?” I asked.

“It's a surprise” he grinned widely. I let go a frustrated sigh.

 

“Ugh! Nobody ever wants to tell me where we're going, everything needs to be ‘be a surprise’, I'm starting to get pretty annoyed by that” I pouted while crossing my arms across my chest. He laughed and glanced at me briefly before turning back to the road.

 

“You can't be patient for a few minutes?”

 

“Nope” I replied, popping the p.

 

“Well, you'll have to in order to find out. . .”

 

I rested my forehead against the window, the sky was so blue; it was indeed such a beautiful day here in L.A. The trees were passing by, and the radio was playing such soothing sound, I almost fell asleep. It seemed like forever when Austin finally killed the engine.

 

I stared at him, he wasn't moving, he just smiled at me. “Now you're going to tell me where are we?”

 

“Sure, let's go” he said and got out of the car. I did the same and followed him. I was soon met by beautiful flowers and a crystal clear blue water. I gasped, admiring how amazing this sight looks.

 

“I love coming here in my free time. . .I can be myself and do whatever the hell I want. I've noticed you've been so stressed with this baby thing. I know that you might be feeling like you can't escape the laughter from our classmates, the tiredness, not even from the complications with your family”

 

“How do you know I have complications?” I asked furrowing my eyebrows in confusion.

 

“You're 17 and pregnant, I don't think they're dancing around with flower crowns in their heads, singing songs and hugging everyone. . .” he said which made me laugh.

 

“You're right, I've been fighting with them so much lately, especially with my big brother”

 

“That's why I brought you here. . .I won't you to relax and forget about them for a little while. Think of nice things and happy endings. Take a deep breath, and try your best to smile”

 

I did as he said. I felt slightly better, but that stinging pain of constant drama was still lingering around in my head. Although this was such a nice gesture of him.

 

I opened my eyes and looked at him, he was staring at me. The sun was setting down, leaving a very particular color in the sky. “Thanks for doing this, but. . .Why?”

 

“Why what?” he asked, confused.

 

“Why are you being so nice to me? I mean, we hardly even know each other. And you know I'm pregnant. Don't you think I'm a slut?”

 

“What? No! Of course not. How can you ask something like that?” he asked with a frown while taking one step towards me. "I would think you're a slut. Yes, I almost don't know. . .But what I is that you're a sweet, strong, and amazing girl” he said and caressed my cheek. “And very beautiful” I exchanged looks from his eyes and dropped it to his lips, he did the same. I never noticed his eyes were so pretty. They weren't as intense as Finn's, but they were indeed stunning.

 

“What are you thinking?” he asked, it came out kind of breathless.

 

“I-I don't know. . .What are you thinking?”

 

“How much I want to kiss you right now” he leaned in, our breaths were mixing. I couldn't kiss him, not again. Finn's face popped up. His toothy grin and cute dimples looking so cute. Austin stopped before, which made me look in his eyes. “But then I remember, that I can't because you don't want to, I guess. . .” he sounded sad and disappointed. But he didn't back away, he kept his face just mere inches from my lips. One leaning, and I'll be kissing him. Why aren't I pulling away? I don't love him, yeah, he is handsome and very sweet, but I don't love him. More importantly. . .I can't kiss him.

 

“Austin” I whispered. He rested his forehead against mine.

 

“I didn't bring you here to force you into kissing me. But I did want to be honest with you and tell you what has been on my mind since the day I met you”

 

“I'm sorry” I finally pulled away. “I don't want to hurt you”

 

"You're not hurting me, Gwen. Is not fair that I put you through this when it’s obvious you have feelings for someone else. It would hurt me if you would kiss me out of pity. I brought you here so you can be free, even if it’s just for one day. But instead I told you straightforwardly what I've been wanting to do” he chuckled and looked down at his fingers. “I'm sorry”

 

I raised my hand and touched his cheek, caressing it delicately, “You don't need to apologize Austin, it's totally fine”

 

He smiled sadly at me. “You're not mad?”

 

“No, why would I be mad?”

 

“Because, maybe—”

 

“Maybe nothing. . .I'm not mad, in fact, I think is very sweet of you in bringing me here” I smiled reassuringly at him. He sighed in relief and then smiled back.

 

“Thank you, and well. . .I hope everything is good between us, even though I almost kissed you a second time” he chuckled nervously.

 

“Of course everything's okay” I said and hugged him, he hugged back but even tighter. When we pulled away, we stared into each other's eyes. “I actually feel much better. Thank you for showing this amazing place, is beautiful”

 

“Like you” he commented, which made me give him a look. He raised his hands up in defeat and smiled innocently.

 

“I know; I know. . .Friendzoned” he said which made me laugh. I punched his arm playfully and then tried to sit on the ground, keyword here: ‘Tried’.

 

“You okay?” he asked while sitting next to me.

 

I nodded. “This baby is not helping at all” I replied. He stared at me with understanding and concern. I let go a heavy sigh, and briefly placed my hand on my stomach.

 

“I'm so sorry that you're going through this. . .It might suck to be like this”

 

I nodded. “Thanks for showing me your concern, but I'm fine. This does sucks, but there's nothing I can do to avoid it from happening”

 

“Have you thought of having an abortion?” he asked which made me look at him with widened eyes. I shook my head repeatedly.

 

“I won't kill him or her. . .I can't have an abortion, even if that would solve my problems. . .I've been always against that method, and I won't use it in a human being, I can't. . .”

 

“I understand, Gwen, believe me I do. . .But, don’t you think is your ticket to go out?”

 

“An abortion is something I won't do, Austin, I won't”

 

He nodded once again and pursed his lips in a tight line. I sighed, and put a strand of hair behind my ear. “I know, that an abortion could solve everything, could be my ticket out, I wouldn't have to go through birth labor. . .But, we're talking about the life of a child that isn't even born, that doesn't have the fault for any of this”

 

“I know, I just thought that maybe—”

“I'm not like that, I will have it. . .The problem is: What I will do when he or she is already here?”

 

“I'm sure you will find the correct answers along the way. . ." he said reassuringly. "May I hug you in a very friendly not-romantic way?” he asked, making puppy eyes. I rolled my eyes playfully, but couldn't help the smile that crossed my face.

 

“I would be mad at you if you didn't” I said and hugged him. He hugged me tightly, caressing my back soothingly.

Chapter 36 - We Should Keep Moving Forward

When Austin dropped me off, I waved at him goodbye and walked to my front door. I saw Alec plopped down on the couch. He noticed me and stood up abruptly. “Where were you!? I was worried sick”

 

“Oh you know, I was getting high with some friends I have from the alley, then we stole a car and started escaping from the police, we went to jail and my friend from the drug store bail us out. . .You know, my typical way of living” I said jokingly.

 

He gave me a look and crossed his arms across his chest. “I'm serious”

 

"I was with a friend. . ." I replied and walked to the fridge. I found a left overs of a chocolate cake my mom had prepared. I smiled and started searching desperately for a spoon.

 

“What friend?”

 

“Do you like interrogating me every time I cross that door? Jesus Alec”

 

“I'm worried for my sister. I just hope you weren't hanging out with you know who”

 

“He has a name you know”

 

“His name tastes sourish coming from my lips. I feel like puking”

 

“You're being so rude right now” I said and kept eating my cake. it was so good. I heard him chuckle, which made me look up at him. He walked towards my direction until he was in front of me. I furrowed my eyebrows in confusion as he raised his hand up to delicately touched the side of my lip with his thumb.

 

"I can't take you seriously when you have chocolate all over your lips" he said. I playfully glared at him, but couldn't help but laugh.

 

“I'm sorry if I'm always asking where you've been, I just—”

 

“Care about you” I finished for him.

 

“Exactly, and you should feel thankful that you have a brother that actually cares enough and protects you. I love you, G. You're my baby sis. . .You can be 17, 20, 30, even freaking 40. . .And I will still call you my little princess”

I couldn't answer to that, I feel like if I do, I will end up crying. He is my big brother and I love him; I love him so much.

 

“I love you too, Al. And you will always be my big brother, no matter what. It doesn't matter how much time changes, I won't stop being your little princess. But, you also need to trust me, and know that I can take care of myself. I need your support 100%, I can't do this alone. . .”

 

“And you won't be alone, that's for sure. I don't want you to grow up so fast, I feel like I'm losing you. Where did the time go, huh? I can still remember when we used to grab all the bed sheets in the house, and build a tent inside our living room using the chairs as support”

 

I nodded, smiling at the memory. “Childhood goals”

 

He chuckled. "You said it, sis" he hugged me tightly. We heard the door clicking open. We pulled away just to see our parents walking towards us.

 

“Hey guys, how was your day?” my dad asked while placing his suitcase on one of the couches.

 

I exchanged some looks with Alec before turning back to our expectant parents. “Good” we said at the same time. I excused myself and went straight to my room. I lied on my bed and stared at the ceiling, briefly glancing at my wall full of pictures. I truly love that wall, all those memories always come rushing to me like lightning every time I take a glimpse from it. I placed both of my hands on my growing stomach. Believe it or not, I'm happy that my parents found out—not in the way they did honestly, that was so bad—you have no idea how much it was killing me not being able to tell them. It felt so awful to hide such thing from them.

 

I heard my phone ringing beside my nightstand, so I grabbed it and saw the BLOCKED ID. It was Finn. I clicked ‘answer’ and then pressed it to my ear.

 

“Hey, what's up?” I asked.

 

“I-well, I texted you a few hours ago, but you didn't answer, I was wondering if you were okay. Where you sleeping or something?”

 

“Clingy aren't we?” I teased jokingly.

 

“Funny. Why weren't you answering?”

 

“I went out. . .” I replied simply, while caressing my stomach. I heard how he was moving and then sitting down where I assume was his couch? Or perhaps his bed?

 

“With who?”

 

“Why do you want to know, Grier? Stalker much?”

 

“I was just wondering, I wanted to talk to you”

 

“Even though we spend like half the day together stuffing our faces with McDonald's, you still wanted to keep the fun going so you started texting me?”

 

“Exactly, you see babe? You get it”

 

I chuckled. “Finn, I just went out with Austin”

 

“What? Why? What did that blonde boy wanted, huh?” 

 

“He wanted to hang out, he's very sweet, you guys would get along pretty well”

 

“Yeah, I don't think so, babe” he said. 

 

“Why not? Are you. . .Jealous?” I smirked, even though he couldn't see me. He huffed, and I can already see him glaring at his phone. 

 

“Me? Jealous? Come on, I am not jealous” he said. I giggled and shook my head in amusement. I took a long sigh, trying not to keep laughing.

 

“Really? Because I would think is really cute if you were jealous” 

 

“Why?” he asked. 

 

“Because it would show how much you care about me”

 

“Sometimes I can't understand girls” he chuckled. 

 

“Well, sometimes I can't understand guys. . .They're always saying how much they hate when girls are so clingy, and here you are, needing to know where I've been”

 

“Touché, Gwen, touché”

 

“Exactly. . .” I smiled “I have to go”

 

“You need to call Justin?” he huffed. 

 

“No, silly, I'm tired, I'm going to bed. And thanks for being jealous”

 

“No problem, beautiful”

 

We said our last goodbyes and then hung up. I let go a long sigh and stared at the pictures ones again. I covered my face with both of my hands. Is like Alec said: Where did the time go?

 

 Why can't I go back in time, and avoid of this ever happening. I just wish more than anything that I could change this mistake, that I would never be pregnant. I want my normal life again. I want all those times where I the only thing I had to worry about was homework and school. But I know that what is done is done, and there's nothing I can do about it. . .

 

A baby is on its way, and the only direction we should go now. . .Is forward.

Chapter 37 - Best Friends for Life

I started puking. The taste was too unbearable so I puked some more. It felt like I was chocking, my forehead was sweaty, and I was trembling. God, I felt terrible. I wanted to stay in, to avoid going to school, which the thought of actually going only made me want to puke all over again. I went back to bed, crawling into my covers, I glanced at the clock, 6:29 A.M. I groaned and turned the other way around.

 

“Please, just take me out of my misery” I muttered under my breath. I heard my door creaking, and I didn't need to look to know it was my mom.

 

“Sweetie? Are you alright?” she asked, her voice full of concern. I groaned once again as a reply. She didn't turn on the lights, so the room was dark. She started walking towards my bed, then sat on the edge. “If you feel like you can't go to school, then don't. . .I understand. Believe me, I was the same way when I was pregnant with your brother and then with you”

 

I faced her, with some tears on my face. I sat up straight and rubbed at my wet eyes. “Oh, baby” she said and hugged me. “Why are you crying?”

 

“I don't know, I just feel so emotional, and-and I feel so bad at the same time. It sucks" I said angrily. My mom shushed me, and rubbed at my back soothingly.

 

“It's alright, just rest, my little angel. . .” she said, and I couldn't help but smiling, it's been so long since she had called me that, it felt so right and sweet to hear her say that.

 

"Later, we have to talk, but for now. . .Just sleep. I'll call to your school, alright?”

 

I nodded slowly and rested my head back on the pillow, letting the sleep consume me completely.

 

• • •

 

“Gwen?” I heard someone calling me. I groaned and rolled to the other side. My stomach had stopped hurting, but now I had a major headache. “Gwen, wake the eff up!” Yup, its Dani. . .She's the only one that would wake me up like that. My parents would just place a single kiss on top of my head, my brother would just shake me until I open my eyes, which was more effective if I'm honest. I admit I'm kind of a heavy sleeper. There could be an earthquake and I would still be under my covers, hugging my pillow. I opened one eye and glanced at her.

 

“What?” I asked, my voice hoarse. I saw her folding her arms across her chest. I glanced at my clock on top of my nightstand. 10:15 A.M. “Why aren't you at school?” I asked.

 

“You missed it, G! We had to leave early, there was sort of an explosion in the lab, and there was gas everywhere. . .We had to evacuate. It was pretty awesome”

 

“Why would I want to witness the fact that I could've died of poisoning gas? That is just horrible” I said, rubbing my sleepy eyes.

 

“Perhaps. But you know that in that school, nothing interesting ever happens, you know?" she chuckled slightly.

“I am indeed pregnant, and I haven't seen a line full of pregnant girls in that school, so I believe something unique and interesting happened already, right?”

 

“You're right, you are unique” she said and took a strand of my hair out of my face. “Anyhow, I called your house since you're obviously not in condition to answer your phone. So when I called, your mom told me you were sick as hell—obviously not using those words—so, as the amazing friend that I am, I brought chocolate ice cream and chick flicks, your favorite combination”

 

“Thanks, but I don't think—”

 

“You're eating a bowl full of very cheap ice cream and watch some cheesy movies with me, no excuses. Even if you're on the edge of dying, I want to spend some time with my bestie” she said. I giggled and took the covers off of my body. I looked up at her, and hugged her slowly. She's my best friend, and I love her.

 

“Of course I will spend time with you. . .The whole day if necessary” I smiled at her reassuringly.

 

She hugged me back again, “I missed you” she whispered into my ear. “I don't remember the last time we hung out together” I nodded in agreement and grabbed her hand.

 

“You're right, and I'm so sorry that I let that happen” I said. She nodded and then we both sat down on my couch, my TV in front of me. She put the movie: The Notebook, even though we watched it like a billion times. But I didn't actually care what movie we were watching, I was just grateful that I have such friend as her.

 

When the movie was over, and the ice cream already eaten, I glanced at my clock. 12:09. I let go a heavy sigh, Dani was resting her head on my shoulder; something she always does ever since we were little kids. And that made me think of when we were much younger. . .

 

Everything started when we were just eight years old. I was bracing myself for what was about to come: A new school. Away from everything old and moving to something new. . .Is a huge process, full of new discoveries and in those times for me, more reasons to feel even more anxious and nervous.

 

My palms were sweaty, and my lip was trembling. My mom smiled understandingly at me, probably knowing the reason to why I'm feeling this way. She was caressing my cheek tenderly, then kissed my forehead. "Everything will be alright" she whispered against my forehead before placing a soft kiss on it. I nodded slowly, still quite insecure. I swallowed the lump in my throat and watched my mom walk away.

 

“Alright, class. . .Today we have a new student” the teacher announced. I took a deep breath, ready to pass out. I hold my chest, so I wouldn't collapse. “Come on sweetie, don't be shy” she said in a delicate voice. I nodded and took a deep breath. I slowly walked inside, everyone was staring at me. I gulped the lump in my throat and stared at everyone with their jeans and shirts. I consciously looked down at my pastel pink dress and nervously twisted one of my braids. I heard people snickering and chattering among themselves, all looking and pointing at me.

 

“Hey, nice outfit, freak” blonde girl said while folding her arms. The class erupted in laughter. I blushed and fidgeted with my fingers.

 

“Meredith, enough!” the teacher said loudly. When they started to quiet down, she turned to me. "Why don't you choose a seat—”

 

“Here! Ms. can she seat down here!?” I heard someone screaming desperately. I looked up, just to see another blonde girl said while waving her hands frantically. The teacher chuckled and motioned for me to go ahead.

 

I shyly sat down at the empty chair, placing my princess themed backpack beside me. I glanced at this girl, she was smiling so widely, in a way I didn't even know was possible.

 

“I'm Dani, short for Danielle, but I hate it when people call me that. . .What's your name?” she asked.

 

“Gwen” I replied simply.

 

"I LOVE your dress" she said. I was about to thank her when I felt how someone was pulling one of my braids.

“Ow” I said.

 

“Aw, did it hurt the little baby?” a blonde guy said mockingly.

 

“Don't bother her you butthole! Touch her again and I'll make sure of making you pay” Dani said with a threatening voice, glaring at the bully. How can someone be so sweet in one second and then the other is all tough and scary? The boy raised his hands up in surrender and went back to talking to his friends.

 

“Thank you” I said shyly.

Her face softened and once again was back to smiling. “You're welcome, I hate bullies” she said. Dani sat even closer to my desk, “Something tells me we will be great friends”

 

And that's exactly what we started to be, best friends.

 

9 years of friendship. The best ones actually. . .We supported each other, we consoled each other. Dani is the type of person that will know exactly what to do or what to say during a crisis. If your boyfriend cheated on you or something, she would appear at your front door with a tray full of chocolate brownies and tissues. She understands me, and I understand her. . .She's not only my best friend, she is my sister.

 

“I am so lucky to have you” I whispered while leaning my head on top of hers, since she was still resting hers on my shoulder.

 

“I am lucky too, G. I am so glad that we met”

 

Chapter 38 - Exposed? Gotta Cover the Truth

Dani left like an hour ago. I walked downstairs and saw my mom sitting on the table, along with my dad. “Hey” I said while walking towards them. They stared at me, with an expression I couldn't quite decipher. “Is everything alright?” I asked, furrowing my eyebrows in confusion. They exchanged some looks with each other.

 

“Everything is alright” my mom replied, with a fake smile.

 

“Actually we—”

 

“Is alright” she interrupted my dad.

 

“Are you sure? You don't sound that way, mom” I said and crossed my arms across my chest. Something was going on, and I have to know what it is. She fidgeted with her fingers and then slowly looked up at me, cautiously.

 

"We've-we've been wondering. . ." she started. "We've been wondering if you were still hanging out with-with Finn, you know. . .The father of this baby?" she asked. I looked at my dad, whose face was turned to my mother.

 

I am indeed still hanging with him, but there's no way in hell I'm telling them that, it would just make things worse. I put a strand of hair behind my ear, biting my lower lip. I shook my head slowly. Of course they didn't buy it. I am a terrible liar.

 

“Are you?” my dad pushed. I quickly shook my head. Guess we're going to the lying option. They stared at me suspiciously, not buying it, of course.

 

“Are you sure?”

 

“Yeah, don't you trust me?” I asked, faking hurt. I smiled nervously, swallowing the lump in my throat. I hate lying them, which is something I started doing since the baby news. They both let go a heavy sigh, my mom smiled at me, rubbing her forehead before standing up.

 

“Of course we trust you, sweetie. . .Is just-is just that we're worried, that's all, we don't want you to get more hurt than you already are”

 

“I am not hurt, mom”

 

“Are you listening to yourself right now?” she said, her voice raising a little.

 

“Mom, he didn't hurt me”

“Gwen, I don't know if you can't see it or even feel that growing stomach that has a baby inside. A baby, Gwen. . .That's how he hurt you, by getting you pregnant!”

 

“But mom—”

 

“Are you or are you not hanging out with him. Be. Honest. Please"

 

“I just—”

 

“Answer your mother, Gwen” my dad interrupted me.

 

“This was my mistake too, I agreed to it”

 

“You were drunk; you weren't thinking at all. He obviously took advantage of you”

 

“He was drunk too you know? It was just one single second of irresponsibility. We didn't know it would actually end like this, mom!”

 

“Gwen, please tell me: Are you seeing him, the answer is not maybe nor I don't know; the answer should be either yes or no. So answer, young lady”

 

“No, I'm not seeing him” I obviously lied, since I already saw him multiple times. But, what were you expecting me to do, huh? I know I shouldn't lie, but if they find out I've been seeing him, then they will most likely kill me; that's not only a reality, is a fact for sure.

 

“But—”

 

“I already answered you, mother. . .I have to go” I said and started walking towards the front door.

 

“Gwen wait, please” my parents tried to stop me, but I didn't look back. I closed the door behind me and started walking till I could find a cab nearby. When I did, I told him Finn's address. When I got to his apartment, I rang the doorbell. Seconds later, a boy with black hair with some highlights appears.

 

“Hey” I said while putting a strand of hair behind my ear. He smiled, folding his arms across his chest.

 

“You're Gwen, right?” he asked. I simply nodded and offered him a nervous smile. “I'm Jack Crawford, it's very nice to meet you”

 

“Same” I replied.

 

“Finn! Gwen is here” he called. Moments later, Finn appeared, wearing a plain white shirt with blue jeans. His hair was wet, it seems like he just got out of the shower, and thanks to the light that was coming from the window and hitting Finn's face, his eyes had a brighter spark.

 

“Gwen, hi” he said while hugging me. “What are you doing here?”

 

“I just wanted to visit you, my parents went back to their interrogation and I seriously didn't want to go through that again” I explained. He nodded understandingly, and motioned for me to walk inside.

 

“Gwen!” I heard Skyler scream, she started running towards me, but stopped dead in her tracks when she saw me. Her view dropped to my stomach. “Did you ate a big fat cake before coming here?” she asked which made the boys laugh their asses off. She doesn't know yet. . .Finn, didn't tell her.

 

“You didn't tell her?” I whispered in Finn’s ear. He shook his head and nervously scratched the back of his head.

 

“I don't know how, is not that easy. . .”

 

“I understand that, but I know she's smart enough to remember when I first saw you that I didn't had this big of a stomach that first time I came here”

 

“Sup, Gwen” Hayden said while plopping down on the couch.

 

I waved at him and shyly stood there. There was a long silence until Jack cleared his throat, all eyes were on him now.

 

“I have to go, but I'll see you guys later. . .Nice to meet you, Gwen” he smiled and left. I turned to Finn who was staring at Hayden.

 

“You want me to go too?” he asked, rolling his eyes. Finn nodded and folded his arms across his chest. "But I'm comfortable" he whined.

 

“Now, Hayden. And please take Skyler with you” he commanded. Hayden stood up and grabbed Skyler's little hand, then both of them left, stomping their feet. “Sometimes he acts like a little kid” Finn said and plopped down on the couch. “So, you came to see me?” he asked.

 

I nodded and sat beside him. He smiled at me and put his arm around my shoulder. “I'm glad you came. . .” he said and kissed my forehead tenderly. I rested my head on his shoulder.

 

“Me too” I whispered. With his free hand, grabbed his phone. I stared at his face, he was. . .Frowning?

 

“Is everything alright?” I asked, furrowing my eyebrows in confusion. He quickly put his phone away and nodded.

“Of course, what makes you think something is happening?” he chuckled and hugged me. I shrugged and stared into his blue eyes. 

 

“Well, you were frowning at your phone”

 

“Don't worry about it, babe. . .It was just a-a t-text” he said and gave me a peck on my lips. “Now, let's talk about how beautiful you look today”

 

“Ugh, don't, please. . .I look like a freaking scarecrow” I said, staring at my lap. Finn brought my chin up for me to face him. He leaned in, but didn't kissed me, he didn't touch my lips. He just paused, exchanging looks from my eyes dropping it to my lips.

 

“You're gorgeous” he whispered and then kissed me, making my stomach flutter and heart racing. We spend like half an hour doing absolutely nothing. We didn't have to do much to actually have fun. I started thinking of when we first met, still not believing that it would end to this. Pregnant and somehow in. . .Love. God, I am crazy. This can't be love, can it? It's impossible that I have this mixed emotions with a guy that I should despise. I don't know what is happening to me, why do I feel like this?. . .

 

I wish I could explain it, but sometimes. . .There are no explanations.

 

Finn's P.O.V

 

@Finnisminebetch: FINN!! What is this fucking picture!? Why are you with a pregnant girl? Are you a dad?

 

@ms_Mendes: OMFG Finn, you're a dad? Damn, guess we came late girls.

 

@oldmemories_: Who is that skank that is with you, huh? What the actual fuck Finn.

 

@Finn_forlife: Should we call you daddy now? Lol. I didn't know that you would become a dad already! They grow up so fast lol #DaddyFinn.

 

Tweet after tweet. . .Each one with a picture of me and Gwen. I can't believe this! A fan must have taken it when we were in public. They can't know I got a girl pregnant, that would ruin everything. I know they wouldn't understand if I told them. They would hate me and Gwen—specially her. But she couldn't know, she won't figure it out.

 

Dammit.

 

I glanced beside me. Gwen was sleeping, resting her head on my shoulder. I quickly started typing a reply.

 

@FinnHarries: Girls, chill out, I DIDN'T get her pregnant. She's JUST a friend, alright? We are NOT dating and never will. Just calm down. Expect new video next week ;)

 

Hurtful? Yeah.

 

Idiotic? Of course.

 

But I had to. If not, my career will be ruined. Everything on which I've been working on will go down the drain.

 

They have to see me as a 'hot' person, absolutely single. I hate that it has to be that way, but that's what they recommended me. I took a strand of hair out of Gwen's face. Damn it, I'm so stupid. I don't even deserve her. Not only did I got her pregnant, but she actually forgave me for being such an asshole. . .

 

But it's better if people don't think we're dating. It's just better that way. . .

Chapter 39 - Prom Dates

Prom.

 

That period of time where girls try to find their perfect someone, the perfect dress, the hair and the make-up. And the boys? Trying to get laid; or that's what Dani told me. The school full of posters, announcing that Prom is on it's way. . .

 

I opened my locker door, and fished out my books for first and second period. Once I took them out, my door closed abruptly. There stood Dani, with an excited look on her face.

 

“Let me guess: Faking it released a new season?” I rolled my eyes. Ask her anything about that TV show, she'll answer you with every single detail.

 

 

“No, sadly they didn't. . .But that's not why I'm excited”

 

“Then what is it?” I asked.

 

“I got a date for Prom!” she squealed. “AND, I get to be in the Prom's Committee. So, I can choose what is happening in that dance. I can choose the theme, the decoration. Every. Single. Fucking. Thing!” she screamed, earning multiple looks from everybody.

 

“Alright, calm down—”

 

“I can't Gwen, I can't! I've been dreaming with this moment since like. . .Forever”

 

“I get it Dan, but if you don't stop screaming they will think you're crazy. Remember that time we were visiting your Grandmother in the Hospital and then you started screaming because you figured out who was A on Pretty Little Liars? You started screaming and then some Paramedics tried to calm you down, in the edge of actually using drugs to make you sleep?”

 

Her smile faded. “How am I going to forget it if you're always bringing it up?”

 

I laughed and we started walking to our next class. “Anyway, what are you going to wear? I'm thinking in using my red strapless dress, the one with the silver belt. That dress is just perfection!” she said and we sat down on our usual spots.

 

“I'm not going” I said, forgetting that that is something that you should never tell Dani, skipping Prom is like telling her the ending of what happens on the Season Finale of Under the Dome. It doesn't end well. . .

 

She gasped loudly. “You're kidding, right? Please tell me for God's sakes that you're fucking joking. Because I'm this close to jumping from a tenth floor”

 

“Talking about Drama Queens” I chuckled.

 

“You can't skip Prom, Gwen, I won't allow it” she shook her head, balling her fists. “We've been dreaming about this moment since we were little kids. Don't you remember that time when we would stare at the ceiling while picturing our perfect dates, the perfect dress, everything?”

 

“Yeah, well, when I was a kid I wasn't expecting in getting pregnant. And here I am, with a belly that keeps getting bigger”

 

“That's no reason for not going. . .Come on G. It's freaking Prom. One day when we grow up, don't you want to have this as a memory. So you're pregnant, and? You know how many girls have gone through this?”

 

“Dani—”

 

“It's going to be so much fun, I promise” she said, smiling reassuringly.

 

I let go a heavy sigh. “I don't even know what to wear”

 

“I'll help you look”

 

“I don't know what I will do with my hair and my make-up”

 

“I'll take care of that too, G.”

 

“I don't even have a date. . .”

 

“I can't believe I am saying this, and most likely I will clean off my mouth with soap and water later, but. . .You can go with Finn. I'm sure he would love to go with you”

 

“Fine” I said.

 

“Come on, you have to go—wait, did you just say fine?” she asked, eyes widened. I nodded, which made her squeal and hug me tightly. “Yes! Thank God you're going. Because this is a moment I want to share with you”

 

“Aww, look at this both skanks in their natural habitats” Meredith said while putting her hands on her hips. Dani let go a heavy sigh, glaring at the witch with extensions.

 

“Are you really that bored with your life that you have to get into everyone' s business?” she asked.

 

With a huff. She replied. “I just love annoying you, Danielle”

 

“Don't call me that, bitch”

 

“Aww, she doesn't like it when people call her Danielle. It drives you crazy, doesn’t it? Why don't you tell to your baby mommy over here to sing you a lullaby?” she said turning to me. “How's the father, huh? Did he realized the mistake he did when sleeping with you? Did he leave you already? I bet he did" she laughed along with her other friends.

 

“Isn't that what your father did? I actually feel glad that he was smart enough to have abandoned you. You know, knowing you would become a pain in the ass” Dani asked. Meredith's jaw clenched and then snapped her fingers. Her minions appeared beside her.

 

“Let's go girls, let's not waste our time with this pair of worthless pieces of shit”

 

“Yeah, leave and go fuck the team of Basketball too” Dani said. With a growl, Meredith stomped her way to the back of the class. I high fived her, smiling gratefully.

 

“As always, you're always to the rescue” I said.

 

“Hey, what are best friends for?” she asked, putting her hand over mine. After the second bell rang, class started. The whole day went on normally. Divas everywhere, ignorant jocks picking on the geeks, grumpy teachers. You know, the usual. Lunch arrived, and as always, my stomach growled at the thought of food.

 

“Hey there, stranger” I heard Austin from behind me. I turned around and greeted him with a smile. “So, do you have a date for Prom?” he asked.

 

“Let me guess: Are you inviting me?”

 

“No, no, I understood that I was punished and send directly to the Friendzone” he said laughing. “I came here to tell you I got a date”

 

“And you're telling me this so I feel jealousy?”

 

“Can you at least pretend you're jealous?” he asked making puppy eyes. I giggled and cleared my throat. I made my best angry eyes, and faked having a pout on my face.

 

“How is it possible that you replaced me so fast, am I not good enough!?” I asked. He chuckled and stared at me with amuse across his face. But, quickly composed himself and followed the joke.

 

“Is not me, babe, is definitely you” he said giving my shoulders a gentle squeeze. My eyes widened and my jaw dropped. I nudged at his shoulder playfully and laughed at his words.

 

“You sure know what to tell a girl” I said sarcastically, rolling my eyes and crossing my arms across my chest. He nodded and casually put his hands inside his jean pockets.

 

“I am indeed very charming” he said, nodding. “Anyway, is a girl from our class”

 

“Who?” I asked.

 

“Veronica” he replied simply. I smiled widely. She's so sweet and gorgeous looking. I remember this one time, she went to visit the elders, and gave each one a flower. She's amazing and with a kind heart.

 

“I'm so happy for you!” I said, clapping a little. After that, the day passed by very quickly, which I was so grateful for. Teachers, of course, giving me some disappointed looks, and don't get me started with my classmates. But you know what? I don't care. I have to stop caring for what people think and start thinking about me. I just stopped caring, and I feel much better ever since. . .

Chapter 40 - The Right thing to Do

|Three Weeks Later|

I hate my life.

 

I already saw on Reality TV Shows like for example: 16 & Pregnant, that being pregnant and at the same time being a baby yourself, is hard. . .Truly hard. I'm puking, eating like a pig, mood swings. Damn it, moms are actually heroes if they went through this and actually survived.

 

“Sweetie, are you alright?” my mom asked from the other side of the door. I flushed the toilet and then washed my face, the fresh liquid somehow refreshing me. I opened the door and offered my obviously concerned mother, a reassuring smile.

 

“I'm fine, surprisingly” I said and went to my room, my mom following me from behind.

 

“Do you need anything?” she asked. I shook my head, and sat at the edge of my bed. I stared down at my stomach, it had grown so much I can't believe it. I shook my head no at my mom. She smiled and sat beside me.

 

“I know you're going through something so hard like this. But, we need to talk about your other options”

 

I let go a heavy sigh. I knew my mom would come up with this. No matter how many weeks pass by, she will come back with the subject. But she's right though. I need other options. I fidgeted with my fingers, before turning my attention back to her. “I'm listening”

 

“I know you wouldn't go for the option of abortion, because, I know you. . .You wouldn't live knowing you did something like this”

 

I nodded, motioning for her to continue “So, the only thing that's left, is an adoption. . .”

 

“Adoption” I repeated. She nodded slowly, waiting to see my reaction. “Mom, I-I don't know. Who would want to adopt a teenager's baby?”

 

“A lot, a lot of women who can't have a baby and are desperate”

 

I thought for a moment, this is a big deal. Adoption, putting my baby in adoption. . .Is this the right thing? I need to tell Finn. “Mom, I have to think about it, plus I need to tell Finn, and-and —”

 

“Finn? The-the father!? Baby, he hurt you, and you're not supposed to be talking to him, I asked you a few months ago if you are”

 

“I'm not!” I said a little too quickly, although when they ask me where I'm going, I tell them that I'm going to the library when honestly I'm going to see Finn. “Is just. . .It wouldn't be fair if he didn't know about this, he's the father after all”

 

“Sweetie, I'm telling you what's best for you. . .He doesn't care about this baby”

 

“Yes he does!” I said. “He does care. . .”

 

“Sweetie—”

 

“Mom, I know you hate him right now, you despise him so much, and I understand. But if there's something I'm sure about: Is that he cares. And if you could give him a chance, then he would prove to you that he not only cares about the baby, but he cares about me”

 

“Alright. . .Why don't you just rest?”

 

“No” I said and stood up from my bed. “I have-I have to go to the library” I said and started walking out of the room. He cares for me, Finn does care. I bet he told everyone about us. If there is an 'us', because I serious don't understand of we're dating or not. I like him so much, but I don't know if he feels the same. Well, he proved to me multiple times, that his feelings are not fake, so I'm guessing perhaps he does like me, a lot. I closed the door behind me, having this urge of crying, but I opposed. I'm letting my mother have power over me about this. Sure, adoption could solve everything, give the responsibility to someone else. But I can't decide something so huge like this without telling Finn first. Of course, I can't tell him now, he has other things in mind. I'll just wait, there's no rush, right?

 

Okay, fine, honestly, I'm pathetic, and such a coward. I can't just go a be like: Hey, Finn, guess what? I'm putting our baby for adoption to random strangers with who we have no damn clue who they are or what they could possibly do. I'm so glad you agree too, bye.

 

That's just not right. At. All.

 

I went to Finn's home; I just want to feel him in my arms again. My heart starts racing with the bare thought of him. And I can't believe it. . .I still can't believe it. From hating him to being crazy for him, it's so weird and just so. . .Unbelievable.

 

I knocked on his door, just to be greeted by Cameron. He smiled sadly at me, which made me furrow my eyebrows in confusion. “Is everything alright?” I asked.

 

“Umm, I don't—”

 

“Gwen?” I heard Finn's voice. “Hey, babe”. I smiled and walked in, giving Cameron one last glance before walking towards Finn. I hugged him and he kissed my cheek.

 

Finn’s P.O.V

 

I kissed Gwen's cheek and motioned for her to seat in the couch. Cameron stared at me with a frown, and with his fingers showed me to come closer to him. I did, with a confused look on my face and my arms folded.

 

“What's up?” I asked.

 

“What's up? She doesn't have a clue of what you've been saying online” he whispered. I glanced quickly at Gwen who was checking something on her phone, then turned back to Cameron. I grabbed his hand and dragged him to another room. “You disgust me” he said as soon as I close the door.

 

“Dude, bare with me. . .I had to do it”

 

“And I understand, Finn. But you could've at least be honest with her. She've been through so much thanks to you” he said, looking at me with disappointment. “I mean, what do you think she's going to say when she sees what people are telling her?”

 

“But I am being honest, I'm not dating her”

 

“But you are indeed the father, and you've been lying saying you're not. Plus, it does seem like you guys are sort of dating at this point”

 

I let go a heavy sigh, “You don't understand—”

 

“Yes, I do” he cut me off, crossing his arms across his chest. “The fame, the fans, that constant weight on your shoulders of always keeping them happy” he took a step towards me. “But think of her, think of her for just one second. A normal girl like any other that is indeed caring your baby. You're supposed to be defending her, not just turning your back. That's not right, man”

 

“Cameron, I know what you mean. Believe me, I feel like complete shit for doing this. The time I have known her I realized how much I genuinely care for her, and I don't want her to get hurt. But I can't allow people to know how much I messed up, that would ruin everything for me and you know it”

 

"You know that maturity is not only the age, is also your way of thinking, how you take responsibility for what you caused. You're not acting like an 18 year-old; you're acting like 12 year-old. Dude, you're my best friend, and I will always support you, but I can't agree with all this. I'm not mad at you, I'm disappointed. . .I just can't believe how you're taking all this”

 

I didn't answer, how can I after that? I am so pathetic and stupid that I'm disgusted with myself. Gwen doesn't deserve this, but I can't tell her what I said. I never wanted any of this to happen; yet here I am, feeling like the most fucking piece of shit ever.

 

He wakes towards the door, and turned around. “I know, Finn, that you will make the right choice and do things right” he said before opening the door and leaving. I stayed there for a couple more minutes, thinking.

 

Why is everything turning to be so freaking complicated? Everything I ever wanted was to have fun, enjoy making vines, greeting fans, and going on tour. And I'm trapped in all this and it seems like I can't get out and escape.

 

I went back to the living room, where Gwen was waiting patiently. Damn, she looked so beautiful. “Hey” she smiled sweetly, cute dimples showing. “Where were you?”

 

Instead of answering, I walked towards her, she was watching my every move. I grabbed her face with both of hands and kissed her. I kissed her with force, with need and desperation. I want her, I was mainly trying to get my mind off of the fact I'm a complete asshole. And I feel that I'm losing her, I don't want her to leave me. The thought alone makes me shiver with fear. She pulled away, her forehead resting against mine.

 

“What are you—”

 

“Please” I cut her off. “Please kiss me”

 

And she did. She made me sit down next to her, and caressed my face tenderly, while placing her soft lips against mine. I kissed her with all I had, electricity running through me. 

 

“Please don't leave” I said between kisses. She shook her head and pulled away from me, pausing for a moment.

 

“I won't leave you” she said and kissed me again. 

 

Chapter 41 - Dress Shopping

Gwen's P.O.V

 

Finn was kissing me in such way that I couldn't get enough. I felt those sparks, my stomach fluttering, and his strong arms behind my back, holding me tightly, like if I was going to vanish in any second. We pulled away, our breaths mixing. I smiled before giving him a peck on the lips.

 

“You are. . .Amazing” he said. I giggled and then placed my hands on my stomach. “Does it hurt?” he asked.

 

“A little bit, yeah” I said truthfully. Finn's expression was something I couldn't quite decipher. Out of nowhere, my phone buzzed, letting me know I got a new text. I thought it could be my parents or my brother and was about to ignore it, but when I glanced at it, I saw the name of Dani on the screen. I grabbed it and unlocked it, the text message popping out.

 

Dani:

 

Have you asked Finn to be your date yet??

 

Gwen? Did you?

 

Come on, I want to go shopping for dresses with you

 

Me:

 

No, I didn't ask him.

 

Dani:

 

Why the heck no!?

 

Me:

What if he says no? He could totally think is a dumb idea. Plus, it’s going to be a crowded place, with people that knows who he is. They're going to be all over Nash as soon as he steps one-foot in.

 

Dani:

 

Just ask him, he could wear a disguise!

 

Me:

 

You're so silly :)

 

Dani:

 

Ask him or I will be sad. Perhaps I can ask him for you ;)

 

Me:

 

No! No, I will ask him.

 

“Who are you talking to?” Finn asked. I quickly placed my phone in the coffee table and turned to him.

 

“It was Dani” I shrugged.

 

“What did she say?”

 

“Uhh, that-that. . .Well—”

 

“Yeah?” he pushed.

 

“There is going to be this Prom in my school, and-and well, I don't have a date. And she suggested that I should go with you”

 

He didn't reply just yet. He scratched the back of his head before turning his attention back to me. “I would love to go with you” he said.

 

“You don't have to—Wait, what?”

 

“I would love to be your date. With my performances, possible tours, interviews, rehearsals and such, I’m pretty sure I won’t be able to attend my own Prom—which sucks—but it would be amazing if I could go with you”

I sighed in relief. How lucky am I of having him in my life? I bet that if my parents and Alec could take a minute to get to know Nash, I know they would adore him.

 

“The thing is, that you're the Finn Harries, pop sensation, I'm pretty sure every girl will be there fangirling”

 

“We'll figure it out, Gwen. . .I'm just so happy that we get to go together” he said, putting his arm around my shoulder. I nodded and hugged him sideways. I looked up, staring into his striking brown eyes. How can someone have such deepness and beauty in them? Once in a while he was checking his phone, but I decided not asking him, who am I for me to be snooping around?

 

So we just talked for what seemed like forever. It was nice getting my mind off things, and Finn is doing such a great job. . .When I come here, all the drama and troubles I've had the entire day, disappear, and is replaced by love and calmness.

 

• • •

 

“So” Dani started, trying to hold her excitement. “What did he say!?” we were currently in our favorite Coffee shop. I sipped on my coffee, the warm liquid was so soothing. Also, I was making Dani wait for my answer. I know, I'm mean, but seeing her freak out is quite amusing. I sipped on my coffee once more, making sounds with my mouth, trying to let her know how much I'm enjoying the taste. She glared at me and snatched the coffee out of my hands.

 

“Come on, Gwen. . .What did he say”

 

“I thought you hated him” I reminded her. She nodded quickly.

 

“Believe me, I do. . .But if he makes you happy, and he treats you right, then, well. . .I can accept him. But I will stand him just for Prom” she said crossing her arms across her chest. “After that, he'll be back on the Black List”

 

“So you're not taking him out of that list?” I asked.

 

She shook her head. “Never. He's only on hold until after Prom” she said. “Now tell me, what did he say!?”

“He said yes” I said, with a wide smile. She clapped her hands and nodded excitingly. Again, some people were giving her some looks.

 

“Yes! Finally, that jerk did something nice” she said happily. I glared at her, letting her know not to say those things about Finn. Of course, since we're best friends, with just one look we can tell each other everything. She sank back in her seat with an apologetic look on her face.

 

“Sorry” she mumbled. I nodded and then leaned my elbows on the table. I stared at my latte, lost in thought. A couple more minutes passed by before looking back at Dani.

 

“Now, what do we do?” I asked, taking a sip of my coffee.

 

“Well, we already have our dates, now we have to go get our dresses”

 

“You know Prom is like a month away, right?”

 

“You know how fast time can fly, right?” she countered back. It is true though. Without me knowing, my little bump started growing every day, and now, it's so hard for me to sit down. People always staring at me, and bickering around. But I made a promise to myself that I wouldn't care, that I would just shrug it off and ignore it.

 

• • •

 

“I hate everything” I stated as I got out of the dressing room. “Nothing fits me right” I stared at myself in the long-length mirror and frowned. “In fact, I look like a stack of potatoes” the dress I was wearing was pink and green—not a very nice combination that can actually look good in me—with a giant bow in the front. I wanted to puke all over again. Dani came from behind me, giving my shoulders a little squeeze. She chuckled and stared at my reflection. 

 

“We'll find the perfect dress; you'll see. . .”

 

“Your positive attitude can't seem to stop amazing me” I said.

 

“You always need to stay positive and make the best out of the situations” she replied hugging me from behind. I smiled, and turned around to be face to face with her. “We'll find your perfect dress, and it will be beautiful”

 

I nodded and we kept searching in other racks. Hours and hours literally passed by so fast you would hardly notice. But we weren't giving up. This is like the fifth store, I want that whole night to be perfect if Finn is going as my date, I want it to be special with him. . .

 

I always dreamed of this: going to Prom. Ever since I was a kid, Dani and I would talk about how our perfect Prom date, or the outfits, or the romantic evening. . .Everything planned out.

 

I want it to be special since I'm going with someone special, with someone that is obviously not embarrassed of being seen with a pregnant girl. He is amazing. . .

 

I was searching in one of the racks looking for a dress for me, since Dani already found hers like half an hour ago. Suddenly, I heard Dani's scream. How did I know it was from her? Easy. . .I got used to hearing it every day now for the past 9 years. And I couldn't love it even more.

 

“What's up?” I asked as she got closer to me.

 

“I. Found. Your. Perfect. Dress!” she said each word slowly and overly excited. I formed my mouth with an ‘o’, and motioned for her to lead the way.

 

She stopped abruptly, which made me crash with her back. “Sorry” I muttered and stood beside her, arms folded.

“There it is” she pointed at one of the racks, my mouth literally fell to the ground. It was the most beautiful dress ever. It was white, long, with some sparkling things in the top part. It had my name written all over it.

 

“And it's big enough to fit your stomach” Dani commented. I nodded in agreement and grabbed it from the rack. It was so pretty I couldn't stop staring at it.  “You should try it on”. I nodded and walked towards the dressing room. I unzipped it and slide it in. I stared at myself in the mirror in front of me and couldn't believe the beauty of this dress. It was big enough for my growing stomach, it was my type of style, it seemed like it was taken out from a fairy tale. I got out of the dressing room, and was met by the squealing and gasps of my dear best friend.

 

“You look beautiful, Gwen! Oh, my God” she said, clapping a little. I giggled, but nodded. "It was totally made for you”

 

“Where did you find it?”

 

“In the Pregnant section” she shrugged. “You should totally buy it”

 

“I-I don't know. . ." I said. "It might be too expensive”

 

“Come. On. Gwen, darling, this dress was totally made for you. And I can bet everyone in our school will drop their jaws at how beautiful you will look”

 

“Yeah, with this giant stomach” I said, caressing it. She smiled sympathetically at me and took a strand of my hair, putting it behind my ear.

 

“You overthink too much. Who cares if you're pregnant? Who has a say on what you do? You're a goddamn treasure and a very amazing person. . .Those assholes who aren't mature enough to comprehend what you're going through, are seriously not worth it. I'm with you, I'll always be there for you, I won't leave you. . .You're my best friend and true best friends will stick around. I'm telling you: I won't leave any time soon. So, you're stuck with me”

 

Those touching words are the most beautiful things I have ever heard. . .I wanted to cry, somehow I felt so emotional, but I refused; I wasn't going to cry in front of everyone in this store, that wouldn't look good at all.

 

“I love you Dani, thanks for being my best friend” I said and hugged her, she hugged me back.

 

“Thanks for always being there for me, G” she replied. 

 

We paid for our dresses and then decided to go and eat at McDonald's, planning on everything else we would need to make our Prom a night we wouldn't forget.

Chapter 42 - Giving Birth Lessons

Finn's P.O.V

 

“You're a douche” Cameron said.

 

“I'm beyond disappointed in you” Jack butted in.

 

“How could you, Finn?” Jacob said.

 

“You're pathetic” Shawn said.

 

We were all in the apartment's living room. I was lying on the couch when all of them stormed into the room, screaming at me. Yup, not only did Cameron told them, they read the awful tweets as well.

 

“Guys, come on. . .You need to understand” I said and sat up straight, all of them glaring at me. “This is my career I'm talking about. If they find out that I fathered a baby, I am beyond doomed”

 

“We get it, Finn, but that doesn't mean you have to be such an asshole with the mom of your baby. You need to take responsibility for what you've done. . .You're lucky she apparently hasn’t read those tweets, because I know she will be devastated” Cameron replied, sitting on the spot next to me. I rubbed at my face with both of my hands, letting go a long sigh. Is not like I wanted to do this, but this is my career, and I can't damage it. I thought nothing could go wrong if I had sex with Gwen, apparently I was wrong. She was supposed to be a one-time thing. . .She wasn't supposed to get pregnant. And I feel like everyone's against me.  “I see the way you look at her; it seems like you feel something. . .So why do you seem embarrassed of being seen with her?” Jack asked, crossing his arms across his chest. I looked at him, with a frown on my face.

 

“I would never be embarrassed of her" I replied, standing up from the couch. I walked to the fridge and grabbed a fresh water bottle, I took a sip. “She is amazing and very strong for going through something like this”

 

“Then why?” Shawn butted in. “Why would you do something like that? Those horrible tweets, have you seen what everyone have been saying?”

 

“Guys—”

 

“Finn, we know fame can be hard, especially for someone that is getting bigger every passing second. . .But, you also need to try to put yourself in her shoes. She's pregnant for God's sakes! With your baby. And I'm sorry, dude but. . .You have to take responsibility for your actions. You screwed up, do something about it. Don't hide behind a computer. That's what a coward does. And I know my best friend, you're not a coward" Cameron said. I know he's right, dammit I know it.

 

“Cam—”

 

“You can hide all you want; you can hide behind that shell of yours. . .But let me tell you something: Lying never ends well” he cut me off.

 

Dammit, Cameron, stop. . .I can't deal with all this now. “I-I have to go now. I promised on Twitter I would upload a new video” I said, scratching the back of my head. Shawn, Jack, and Jacob stared at me with one last glare before turning on their heels and leave. Cameron looked at me with disappointment.

 

“You know we're here for you, right?” he asked.

 

I nodded.

 

“I know, you will do the right thing” with one last look, he walked away and disappeared into his room. I grabbed one of the pillows on the couch and threw it across the room, I walked to the wall and punched it with all my strength. Yeah, not one of my best ideas. I screamed in pain, with multiple fuck's. Thank God Skyler is not here anymore; what kind of example would I be? Well, is clear I can't be a good role model after all of the past evens that had happened. God, I am such an idiot.

 

I grabbed my phone from the coffee table and started texting Gwen.

 

Me:

Hey gorgeous :)

I clicked ‘send’ and waited patiently for her reply. A lot of thoughts running through my head. What if she did read the tweets? What is she figured everything out? Does she hate me? Am I dead to her? I stared at the phone like if my life depended on it, I started thinking of why she's not answering.

 

“Come on, Gwen, please answer me” I mumbled.

 

I was about to give up, when my phone buzzed. Her name popped up and relief washed over me.

 

Gwen:

 

Hey handsome, what's up?

 

I sighed in relief.

 

Me: 

 

Not much, missing you :)

 

Gwen:

 

Awww, you're so sweet, I miss you too <3

 

Yeah, I'm an asshole. . .

 

Gwen:

 

Guess what!? I bought a Prom dress!

 

Me:

 

Really? That's so cool babe, I'm excited to see you in it. I bet you will look gorgeous as always.

 

I smiled, and placed my phone on top of the coffee table. I closed my eyes, and started thinking of that beautiful blue eyed girl who can't see that I am a douchebag.

 

Gwen's P.O.V

 

I sighed happily, picturing Finn and I, both going to my Prom together. He would give me a corsage, and tell me how beautiful I look. We would walk inside the party hand in hand. . .Those blue eyes that get me weak will stare at me with my gorgeous dress, and he will kiss me like if his life depended on it. God, I can't wait for that night to happen.

 

I stared at my reflection on the full-length mirror, my stomach so grown up. . .It hurts a little but I tried to hold it. I can't believe how many months have gone by. How in not so much, this baby, the little person that started it all, will finally come out of me and look at the world. I hear a knock on my door, my mom stood there.

 

“Hello sweetie” she greeted me.

 

“Hey, mom, what's up?”

 

“I was just wondering how you were holding up, and-and if you needed anything? Do you want a sandwich or something?”

 

I chuckled, "No, mom, I'm fine, really. . ."

 

“I just want to do something for you, I feel so useless” she folded her arms and leaned in the door frame.

 

“Don't say that, please, you are not useless at all” I turned around and started walking towards her. “Mom, I don't want you to ever feel that. . .”

 

“Is just that you're going through this, and there's nothing that I can do to stop it, it is happening and you will have to go through labor in not so much. . .Sweetie, I'm so worried about this baby just as much as you are, but the reason that I am like this is because my own baby is giving birth to another one”

 

“Everything will turn out fine, mom, I promise” I reassured her. She smiled and hugged me tightly. I love spending this time with her, with all the work she has to do, I don't remember the last time she ever hugged me like this. It feels. . .Nice and comforting.

 

“I'm going out” I informed her while pulling away. She nodded and placed a sweet kiss on top of my head.

 

“If you need whatever, anything. . .You can always count on me. Your father and I will understand and support you through everything, so will your brother” she reassured me.

 

“I know; you've been showing me that since the first time you heard the news. Thanks, mom” I said and hugged her once more, I'm so lucky to have such an understanding family. She turned on her heels and left, I stayed a little bit longer, staring at nothing in particular, just being thoughtful. I need to look through my choices, and I can't do it alone--but at the same time, I can't just go on and tell Finn about an adoption, although that could solve so many things. I shouldn't have to worry about taking care of a baby, while I'm still one. . .These months have been so tough and hard for me. I cried, I've been hurt, I loved, I felt things I wouldn't have felt before. . .This sure have been such an emotional roller coaster.

 

I let go a heavy sigh and stood up from my bed. I grabbed my purse from one of my hangers and head out the door. I instinctively caressed my growing stomach, drawing circles in it. I hope he/she can know that is not their fault and that I actually care too much for this person. I'm just growing too attach to it, and he/she didn't even saw the world yet, this baby hasn’t even opened his/her eyes and I just feel such connection. Is this what it feels like to be a mom? 

 

I opened the front door and inhale the fresh air. It was kind if windy today. I checked my phone just in case I received any messages, but I didn't. So I just start walking, where? Anywhere. . .The simple fact that I get out of the house is enough to make me have a smile on my face. I don't want this baby to make me feel embarrassed of myself. What is done is done, and I deserve some fresh air. It feels so good. I saw a Starbucks so I decided to stop by.

 

The girl on the register smiled sweetly at me, she seemed of 20. I ordered a Pumpkin Spice latte and then sat down on one of the tables. It seemed eternal, but I didn't care, I enjoyed sipping on it, staring at my surroundings. It was so calmed here, so peaceful. I closed my eyes briefly and started thinking: Should I put the baby in adoption? Should I keep it? I'm still in High School, this is too much responsibility. I sipped at my coffee again, trying to put those thoughts to the back of my head, but they would crawl back in. It was inevitable to stop thinking about it.

After a while, when I finished, I threw my stuff in the trash can and walked outside.

 

I started walking down the street, trying to think of something nice, anything actually. My family, this baby, Finn. . .I smiled, just the thought of him made me happy, which is kind of ironic if you think about it. Months ago, I couldn't even see his face without wanting to punch him. Now, is like I need him. His cute texts, his warm hugs, the special things he does when we go out, his addicting kisses. When he smiles when we're together, my world is being blown away.

 

I sighed happily, he makes me happy.

 

From a distance, something caught my attention. Curiously, I started walking towards this establishment. Through the window, I saw plenty of women lying on the floor, with men holding them. The sign said: “Pregnancy labors training. Be ready for your special day!”

 

I walked inside, making a little bell on top of the door ring. A woman wrong dirty blonde hair, and yoga clothes, stood up and offered a sweet smile.

 

“Well, hello there!” she said excitingly, rushing towards me. "Are you here for a free lesson?" she asked.

 

“I-I was just curious, you know” I said, putting a strand of hair behind my ear.

 

“Come on, here we will teach you what to do when the time comes”

 

“Sure”

 

“Now, where's the father?” she asked.

 

“I'll call him. Though I hope he doesn't get scared for all this” I said jokingly. I truly hope he comes.

 

“Perfect! Now, if you excuse me, I'll keep going with these people. Whenever you're ready, bring a mat from the shelf and join us”

 

I nodded and took out my phone.

 

Me:

 

Hey, can you make me a favor?

 

He replied almost instantly, how sweet!

 

Finn:

 

Anything for you, babe :)

 

I send him the address of this building and practically begged him to come without asking any further questions. I truly want to know if he would do something like this for me. Besides, I want to be prepared to know what I have to do for when the day comes.

 

I sat at one of the benches, waiting, when suddenly, I heard the little bell ring. I looked up hopeful, thinking it was Finn. But it wasn't, it was Austin.

 

I stood up and walked towards him. “Hey” I smiled as he came closer to me.

 

“Hey, Gwen”

 

“What are you doing here?” I asked, furrowing my eyebrows in confusion.

 

“I was passing by and saw you through the mirror. What are you doing here?”

 

“Well, I thought I should be prepared for when I have to give birth”

 

“Without a partner?” he asked.

 

“Well, I was waiting for someone, the father actually”

 

“If you want, I can help you while you wait”

 

“That's very sweet, but you might have a lot of important stuff to do, I don't want to slow you down or anything”

He took out his phone and stared at it thoughtfully. “Well, Gwen, you're in luck, because I have absolutely no place to go”

 

“Are you sure?” I asked.

 

“100%. Now, let's go grab your mat”

 

I nodded and walked to a spot free of those women doing weird noises. Austin brought a blue mat and placed it in the ground, then we heard the woman in charge give directions.

 

“Okay, people!” she started, clapping her hands, making everyone bring their attention towards her. "Now, when you are in labor, what you should do is being calmed. Breath in and out, so grab your partner's hand and squeeze it hard, calming your breath” she instructed.

 

“This is weird” I commented, earning a chuckle from Austin. He grabbed my hand and I squeezed his gently. I closed my eyes and tried to go to my happy place; which consists of a beautiful beach and books to read.

 

“Are you calmed?” Austin whispered in my ear. I nodded slowly. I felt him kissing the top of my head, which felt so soothing and helped me relax even more.

 

“Try your best to console your partner through this situation. Come on guys, she is literally squeezing a watermelon down there” the instructor said, which made us all laugh. Auditing started soothing rubbing my back, then caressed my shoulders, his hand was warm and soft.

 

“Excuse me. Am I interrupting something?”

 

I opened my eyes abruptly, just to see Finn standing there. Arms crossed, a not so very happy expression plastered on his face.

 

“H-hey F-Finn! What's up?”

 

“This was your favor? Making me come here so I can see how Justin touches you?” damn he sounded angry.

“My name is actually Austin—”

 

“I don't care, dude” Finn cut him off. I pulled away from Austin and walked towards Finn.

 

“I was actually waiting for you so we can do this together. Then Austin appeared and offered to help me while I waited for you” I explained.

 

“You really wanted me to do this with me?” he asked, smiling slightly.

 

I nodded, “Of course, Finn. You're the father after all”

 

“Wait.” Austin started with widened eyes. “Finn freaking Harries is the father of your baby!?”

 

“Yeah, yeah, you can fan girl later” Finn replied coldly which made me look at him warningly. He let go a heavy sigh and then scratched the back of his head.

 

“Do you still want me to help you?” he asked, hope in his mesmerizing blue eyes.

 

“That would make me so happy” I said truthfully.

 

“I'll-I’ll see you at school, Gwen” Austin said aiming to give me hug, but Nash stood on his way.

 

“You seem like a nice guy, but that doesn't mean you can touch her” he said. Austin chuckled, of course Finn didn't threatened him, he must idolize him all the time notice his jealousy.

 

“Understood” he raised his hands up in defeat. “We are just friends and I swear I wouldn't try anything with her”

“Good, now get out” he said, now with a joking tone. Austin did a military salute and sent me one last smile, then turned on his heels and left. Now it was just Finn and I.

 

“Shall we?” he asked, holding his hand for me to grab it. I smiled and took it.

 

“We shall”

 

And that's how we spend the rest of the afternoon, learning about how will be the day that this little person that started it all, will come out and see the world with his/her little eyes.

 

 

Chapter 43 - This is My Fault

“Where were you?” my brother asked, I sensed some anger in his voice, and I didn't like where this was going.

I walked towards the couch, sat down, and shrugged my shoulders. “Why do you want to know?”

 

He scoffed, arms crossed, a little glare plastered across his face. “Because I'm your brother, Gwen. I thought we already went through that. I am your older brother; my job in this world is knowing where you are and how can I protect you. You are indeed my little sister after all”

 

“I already told you that wherever I go, it's my business, not yours. And you know what? I am tired of arguing with you”

 

“We don't argue; we discuss”

 

“Really? Are you sure? Ever since the baby news, we've done nothing but to scream at each other, or-or you trying to babysit me—”

 

“I'm trying to protect you”

 

“I love you, but I don't need protection”

 

“Where. Were. You?” he asked each word deliberately slow. I let go a heavy sigh, and started debating with myself, thinking what excuse could I make.

 

Oh, you thought I would be honest and tell him about Finn?

 

Well. . .You got that wrong.

 

He would obviously kill me if he knew. But he would kill Finn first. I'm sure of that.

 

“Well?” he pushed, impatiently tapping his fingers in the wall, waiting for my response.

 

“I just went out—”

 

“With Dani? I just went out with her, you weren't there” he interrupted me.

 

“No, I just walked around, getting some fresh air” which was actually true. I just so happened to have found that pregnancy building, and so only then did I call Finn.

 

“Bullshit” was his only response. Now, that made me mad. Furious even. I stood up from the couch, my blood boiling in a way that I couldn't help but balling my fists.

 

“What does it matter for me to actually tell you where I was if you aren't going to believe it!? Why do I even bother to tell you, huh? If you are just going to jump in to conclusions”

 

“I didn't jump into conclusions; I'm assuming that you're lying. I can see it in your face”

 

“That's the thing, you always assume, you never trust me”

 

“You were with Finn, weren't you?”

 

I raised my hands up in surrender, and shook my head. Yes, I was technically saying the truth, Finn appeared after everything. It wasn't planned for us to meet up.

 

“This, is unbelievable. You are unbelievable” I started walking up the stairs, walking to my room.

 

“Gwen, come back here! We aren't done talking”

 

“We finished with this conversation ages ago! You are the one who keeps going and I am so done!” I screamed and smashed my door so hard I believe even the neighbors heard it.

 

What is happening to us!?

 

We never, ever, argued like this before. It's so uncommon for us to s team like this.

 

Why, why, why?

 

All I wanted was some support, not an interrogation every day I cross through the front door. What's next, tie me to a chair and torture me until I speak. I mean, it's sweet that he cares for me, but everything has a limit, and he crossed it a long time ago. I am tired, with all of this. Every time I think it's going to be a good day, it always ends up with screaming, crying, everything. I'm crying by now, hugging my pillow as the tears rolled down my face. I caressed my stomach once in a while.

 

“It's not your fault” I reassured to my growing bump. “It's mine for allowing this to happen”

 

Chapter 44 - If He Truly Makes you Happy

I haven't spoken to Alec for weeks. We would bump with each other in the hallway, but none of us would say anything. It was unbeatable to be like this with my brother. I hate it. . .

Lately, I've been hating a lot of things. And the feeling of not knowing what the hell I'm supposed to do is awful. I did the same with Finn; every time he texted me it tried to call me, I would ignore it. Is enough that I'm pregnant. I can't deal with all this.

I'm supposed to be like the other teenagers. Waking up, going to school, hanging with friends, then go to bed, the next day doing everything all over again.

Now, is different, so much different.

I wake up, puke, I have food cravings every time, mood swings, more puke, and constant arguing a with the ones I love.

“Are you okay?” Dani asked as she walked up to me. I've been staring at my locker for at least fifteen minutes. I blinked repeatedly and then looked at her, concern plastered across her face.

“Y-yeah, I'm totally fine!” I said, forcing a smile.

“Are you sure? You look like you want to cry”

Which was true. I've been so emotional lately, and more now after arguing with my brother. I don't care if it was weeks ago, he's my older brother and having a screaming match with him doesn't lighten my day. I closed my locker door, and pressed my books tightly against my chest. I let go a heavy sigh and stared at my worried best friend.

“Dani, everything is fine”

“Lately, is hard to believe that you are actually fine, you know? Alec is so worried about, honestly, so am I”

“Now you're talking about me with your boyfriend” I didn't intend for it to come out the way it did.

“Is just that he was worried of what to do to help you go through this, that's all”

I shook my head, “I-I love that he's trying to support me, I love that he's trying to accomplish his job as an older brother. But as I said to him—which you can totally tell him the next time you both meet up—there is a limit. And interrogating me every single day, is crossing it”

"G, I just—”

“Look, let's just go to class, okay? I am so tired and I have a test of History at third period. Can we just go?”

She nodded, with no more words said. It was hard talking to her during the entire school day. We just exchanged some yes's and no's, that was pretty much it.

I got an A+ in my test by the way, at least something went well during this very dreadful day.

 

• • •

 

I walked out to the school's parking lot, Dani told me to wait for her in her car, since she needed to ask something to a teacher. I hummed my favorite song and walked peacefully to her red SUV.

“Gwen?” I heard someone from behind me.

I turned around slowly, and sure enough, Finn was standing there.

“What the hell are you doing here?” I asked.

“I was—I was worried that you weren't picking up. I thought something was wrong"

"No, nothing's wrong. I just needed some space, that's all"

I haven't noticed how much I missed him during these weeks. God, he looked so hot with his messy long brown locks, his white shirt and blue jeans. His penetrating eyes were brighter than ever.

“But now that you're here, I can do this” I said and walked towards him. When we were mere inches from each other. I grabbed his face with both of my hands, and tenderly kissed him on the lips.

When we pulled away, he had a happy smile on his face, he rested his forehead against mine and kissed the tip of my nose.

“What the fuck Gwen!”

You have go to be kidding me!

I tilted my head sideways and saw a very pissed off Alec standing there, ready to kill someone very soon.

“Alec, I—”

“Save it, I thought mom was pretty clear when she said not to hang out with this—with this asshole. And then again, I was right all along, you were seeing him. Not only seeing him, but making out with him too. How could you, Gwen? How?”

“Dude, wait, she didn't—”

“Shut up, or I will kick your ass, you are truly asking for it, Harries. And it won't take long. Punching a fag like you won't take me long or my energy”

“Alec! Stop, don't you get it?”

“What is to get, huh? That you lied, that you've been defending this jerk all this time? Because you made that clear to all of us”

“I don't want to fight anymore, okay? Ever since this baby, we've been in a constant screaming match day and night, day and night. I can't stop seeing him, not only because he makes me happy, but also because he's indeed the father of this baby. And that will never change, you have to accept it once and for all. You are my brother, and I hate when we fight. I was expecting your support in all this, and you promised you would help me”

“What do you think I've been trying to do all this time?”

“You think that the way you're acting, actually helps me, but it doesn't”

He let go a heavy sigh. “Gwen, I'm sorry, I really am. But, I can't help to think that my little sister is pregnant, at seventeen. It kills me to think that I can't do anything to stop it. You will go into the delivery room and have a baby. I feel so useless, and-and in so much pain, that I can't help but reacting like this. I didn't mean to hurt you”

“I love you” I said and rush towards him. I hugged tightly and so did he.

“This doesn't me I like you” he said once we pulled away. Nash raised his hands up in surrender and then casually put his hands inside his jean pockets. I rolled my eyes playfully and nudged at his shoulder.

“Why do I still hate the idea of you two hanging out?” he whined, which made me giggle.

“Perhaps because you still want to use his face as a punching bag?”

“So true” he said and kissed the top of my head. “Our parents will be pissed” he reminded me.

“I know, but I will tell them”

“Gwen, he's an asshole”

“But he does make me happy” I smiled. He let go a heavy sigh, and nodded.

“What are your intentions with my obviously pregnant sister?” he asked Finn. I punched his shoulder a little too hard.

“Hey!”

“I have to ask, sis, I need to know”

Finn's P.O.V

My intentions? My intentions? Before getting to know her, my only intentions were banging her so hard to prove the others that I could get a girl whenever I want to.

But now. . .

But now is different. So much different.

Not only do I want to take care of her and make her smile every day if possible, I think I'm starting to fall in love with her.

I don't want her to suffer, and I know if she ever finds out about what everyone is saying about this baby thing, she will be pissed, beyond that. I'm scared of losing her, I can't tell her all that her. It's too soon, and I really missed her.

“My intentions are to make her happy and protect her, bro, your sister is the best thing that ever happened to me”

He exchanged looks for Gwen to me, then had a small smile. “You are still a jerk to me, that will never change. But, if you make her happy, then I will be happy too”

Painful thoughts, along with guilty ones clouded my mind.

“Just tell her!” my subconscious scolded. But I couldn't, how could I? God dammit. Cameron's words of wisdom wouldn't stop ringing in my head. But I am not lying to her because I want to, I'm just doing it to protect her. I really have these crazy feelings for her, but I know this is wrong. My mouth doesn’t seem to spit out what I have to say, and that is eating me alive.

“Thanks” was my only response.

I just reached a new level of stupidness. Her brother smiled and gave us one last look before turning on his heels to leave. I was one again left alone with Gwen. She had such a happy expression that I didn't wanted to ruin her. God, she's so beautiful.

“Wow, that went better than I expected” she laughed and hugged me. I hugged back, but tighter. Her hair smelled so good, so sweet. I closed my eyes, savoring this moment.

I will tell her. Just not now, but I know that it needs to be done, eventually. She does the deserves this. With the pregnancy, with everything that she' expectations been through; she doesn't fucking deserves this.

 

 

Chapter 45 - The Words Can't Come Out

Gwen's P.O.V

 

We've hang out the entire week. It was amazing how caring he was, how romantic. Every time he hugs me, he hugs me so tightly that it seems like he does believe I will vanish in any second. That is so sweet.

 

“I can't believe he lets you be with me” Finn smiled and kissed my forehead. We were currently in his apartment, watching a very cliché movie, but I didn't care, as long as I was with this cute blue-eyed boy, nothing will ever matter.

 

“I know, though I still need to tell my parents about it, and they for sure won't take it that good” I said and took out my phone. I got into Twitter and started typing Finn's username.

 

“Wh-what are you doing?” he chuckled nervously, while taking my phone out of my hands.

 

“I was about to follow you on Twitter” I said and tried to get my phone back, but his arms are way longer than mine, so he of course had it out of my reach.

 

“Y-you don't have to, babe” he said. Why was he so nervous?

 

“Why not? I want to follow you. . .I never felt like doing that, since I was never a huge fan—no offense”

 

“Is just that—” he scratched the back of his head.

 

“Is just that what?” I pushed.

 

He locked gazes with me. “We are dating, right?” he asked. I was taken aback for a second.

 

“I guess”

 

“If you follow me on Twitter, it would seem like I am with a fan, not just a normal girl. You don't have to follow me, Gwen, really”

 

“Oh come on—”

 

“I'm serious, babe, you don't have to” he gave me a peck on my lips and smiled reassuringly.

 

I let go a heavy sigh and nodded. “Fine” I replied, and he gave me back my phone. That is such a lame excuse, like, the lamest I've ever heard. But, we are indeed sort of dating right now. If he doesn't want me to follow him (which is weird since he is a god damn POP STAR for the love of God) then I won't follow him, I need to trust him in this one.

 

We kept watching the movie, until Finn truly got bored and thought it would be a good idea to start kissing me. I didn't complain honestly. I wanted to kiss him just as much. Suddenly, we heard the front door open, so I quickly pulled away.

 

“Hey, Gwen” Cameron said and plopped down in the couch, exchanging looks from Finn to me.

 

I smiled. “Hey, Cam. What's up?”

 

“Not much, really? How's the baby doing?” he asked.

 

“I believe everything is good. Though I will make an appointment to see the Doctor, perhaps tomorrow”

“Maybe I can go too” Finn butted in.

 

“That's sweet, but I will ask my mom to come with me”

 

“But I'm the father—”

 

“Finn, just let her go with her mom, they probably need son bonding time, right?" Cameron said.

 

I nodded. “Yeah—”

 

“But don't you think that as the father, I should be going too. I need to be well aware of what's going on”

 

"Nash, I get that you want to help, but I think we need this" I said, patting him on the knee.

 

He sighed defeated, but nodded anyway.

 

“Anyway, I hope you're doing okay, Gwen" Cam smiled. “And say hi to Dani for me”

 

“No, I remember that look, and you are so late, my friend” I replied. “She's dating my brother”

 

“Oh, man, well. . .I hope he makes her happy then” he squeezed my shoulder. “Feel better, and I'll see you around”

 

I nodded. “Thanks, Cam”

 

He didn't leave yet, as he gave Finn a look, then walked out the front door. Silence grew among us, until I decided to speak up.

 

“What was that all about?” I asked. Finn seemed startled for a moment, as if he was just being awakened from a trance.

 

He shook his head and then offered me a smile. “What?” I asked, furrowing my eyebrows in confusion. He started looking anywhere else, but me.

 

“Nothing, really. . .I just can't believe that we're actually here, together. After everything that happened, it feels so surreal, that I can have you in my arms”

 

“Cheesy! Oh, my God” I burst out laughing. He nudged my shoulder playfully.

 

“Well, I thought girls liked that type of stuff”

 

“I guess some of us do, I like that you think of me that way, that you actually care for what I'm going through. You've been acting so maturely about this baby situation, and that's something that not every guy can handle. . .And I laughed because I never picture you saying these things”

 

“Oh, come on, I can be romantic”

 

I nodded in agreement. “I know”

 

“So that's why, I got you something, to prove my romanticism" he smirked and retrieved something from his left pocket.

 

“You don't have to give me anything, Finn, really”

 

“You're right in that one, babe. I don't have to give you anything at all, but the thing is. . .I want to. And since I can be very stubborn and sometimes, a pain in the ass, you will be forced to accept this gift that took me a lot of patience and dedication to find” he handed me a black box. I smiled and held it in my hands. How thoughtful of him getting me something when he obviously didn't have to.

 

“Come on, open it!”

 

“Fine! Fine, chill, geez”

 

“Well, I want to know if you like it or if I suck at giving presents to girls”

I chuckled and slowly opened the box, revealing a gold necklace with the shape of a heart. I gasped and grabbed it.

“Oh, my God, Finn, is beautiful”

 

Finn's P.O.V

 

“I tried to find the most beautiful necklace, so it can fit a beautiful girl” I said and kissed the top of her head. She  smiled brightly and hugged me tightly.

 

“I love it! Finn, this is beautiful” I said. He pecked on my lips, his blue eyes lighting up. “Can you put it on?” she asked and handed me the necklace. She grabbed my hair and put it aside so I can put it. I did, and hugged her from behind, kissing her cheek.

 

“You look gorgeous, as always” she hugged me once again, then placed a kiss on my neck. Suddenly, my phone buzzed, so Nash pulled away from me. It was a text from Cam. . .

 

Cam:

 

“Call me, now”

 

I told Gwen to give me a second and I quickly rushed to another room, making sure of locking the door. I dialed Cameron's number as fast as my fingers would let me. I pressed the phone to my ear and waited for him to pick up. He did almost instantly.

 

“Finn, thank God” he said.

 

“W-what-what happened!? Are you alright!?”

 

“Yes, b-but, is about Gwen”

 

“What about her Cam, spit it out!” I was getting desperate.

 

“Have you seen the tweets?” he asked.

 

“What are they saying now?”

 

“Not only tweets, Finn. . .They posted videos, a lot of them, insulting Gwen” he said. I started pacing around the room. This can't be happening! I can't fucking believe it!

 

"This have gone way too far. . ." I said, leaning my back against the wall.

 

“Yeah, because of you”

 

“Don't you think I already know that? Fuck!” I groaned in frustration, hitting the wall. This was the last thing I wanted to happen. What the hell. . .I didn't want them to go against Gwen. She doesn't deserve this; she hasn't done anything wrong. I am the asshole here.

 

“What do you want me to do!?”

 

“To tell her the truth, Finn, for the love of God, what you should've done a long time ago"

 

“But that won't change anything, right? Think about it, Cam, remember she's pregnant, I open my mouth and there's another thing that she needs to worry about, another thing to add to her list of stress”

 

“But don't you think it's better if she finds out by you, and not strangers, huh? I can see the way she looks at you; do you want to lose her?”

 

“Why do you think I'm doing this in the first place? Do you think I actually enjoy knowing that these girls are talking shit about her, do you think I'm happy with this?”

 

“Finn, you know lying to her isn't doing any better. She needs to know that half of your fans are basically bullying her, and she doesn't have the fault. . .”

 

“Dammit, you're right!”

 

“Of course I'm right, you dummy. Now, go talk to her now!” 

 

“She won't forgive me, Cam. I really don't want to lose her” I tried to fight the tears, I can't cry, I just can't. But every time I think of losing the beautiful hazel-eyed girl that is outside in our living room, I just want to bawl my eyes out, for being so stupid. I never wanted anything like this to happen. Why? Just tell me why the fuck why is this happening!? Wait, I know. . .Because I'm such a douche bag that had supposedly one night stand with an innocent girl. Hope that cleared up the confusion of why am I winning the trophy for Jerk of the Year.

 

He let go a heavy sigh, “If I was her, I would really like to know the truth by someone I know. And not having to find out by social media. . .We've talked about this”

 

“C-Cam—” I took a deep breath, one single tear escaped my eyes and I quickly wiped it away. I sat at the ground, and put the phone down for just a second to compose myself, before I really become a true wreck. I placed the phone back to my ear. “I know you're right, and that she deserves to know the truth, b-but. . .It's just so hard, it will be so hard to look into her eyes and say something like this, and-and to tell her that I was the one that lied and said that I wasn't the father. She will feel awful”

 

Just like I am feeling right now. . .

 

“Finn—”

 

I heard a knock on my door, so I quickly stood up. “I-I have to go” I said and ended the call. I walked towards my door, and opened it slowly, revealing my beautiful Gwen.

 

“I really have to go” she said.

 

“Y-yeah, I'll-I'll take you, alright?” I offered, she smiled and nodded, grabbing my hand. I placed a kiss on the top of her head.

 

Gwen's P.O.V

 

“Thanks for dropping me off. . .” I said. He smiled sweetly, and grabbed my hand delicately. We stayed in silence for s couple minutes, I glanced out the window from time to time, he was caressing my hand with his thumb. The only thing to be heard in this car, was the peaceful melody of a song in the radio.

 

“You know I would do anything for you, right?” he had a weird look on his face. Somehow, when he said that, he just couldn't look at me. He've been acting so weirdly lately, I wonder why? 

 

“Finn?”

 

He slowly looked up at me, he had his eyebrows knitted together, his lips in a tight line. “Are you okay?”

 

“Yeah, why wouldn't I be?”

 

“You've been acting strange lately. . .If you want to talk about anything, you know that you can tell me anything”

“All I know is that I can be such an asshole, and I-I'm glad that you're still here with me, judging by this entire situation. I can't believe what a jerk I was when I first found out about this baby, God”

 

“Finn, is fine—”

 

“Is not fine, Gwen, is not fine at all. . .I can be an idiot”

 

“But you're not being an idiot now, and that's all it matters. You're here, with me. You've been so good to me, you've been taking this entire situation with maturity, with responsibility, you care for me”

 

“I haven't been good at all” he muttered under his breath, but I heard quite right. I furrowed my eyebrows in confusion as he places his free hand in the steering wheel, looking out the window. Silence again.

 

“Excuse me? Why do you think you haven't been good at all?” I asked, confused. He've been so kind, so thoughtful. He was fine when we were at his apartment. Why is he acting like this?

 

“Finn, you need to tell me what is going on? What is happening to you? Why are you talking like this? What in the world is bothering you?” I asked. He let go a heavy sigh, and locked gazes with mine, finally. He was silent for a moment to take a deep breath. He was still holding my hand, but his grip started getting tighter, and he was looking at me with such intensity. He've been acting so weird when we left his apartment, I'm worried. . .I want to know why is he acting this way, ever since he got into that room, and then opened the door for me, everything seemed off.

 

Finn's P.O.V

 

I have to tell her. . .

 

Dammit, I know I have to. . .Things will get worse if I don't. But if I do, she will be so pissed, so fucking pissed. I lied. I lied about us, about the baby, about everything. . .Just because I wanted them to think that I was single and that I was totally fine. That is all wrong, she doesn't deserve that. . .This is all my fault.

 

“Well?” she pushed. Her big eyes I came to love so much were filled with confusion and worry. I closed my eyes for a brief moment before opening them again.

 

“Gwen, I have to tell you something very important”

 

“I'm listening. . .” she said. My grip in her hand got tighter. With my free hand, I took one strand of her hair and placed it behind her ear. God, she's gorgeous.

 

“I, well. . .I just—”

 

Her phone started buzzing, making her stop looking at me, and retrieving it from her purse. “Finn, I'm so sorry, but I truly have to go. My mom needs me right now” she said and kissed my cheek. She unbuckled herself and went out the door. “But, we will talk, and you will tell me what is bothering you so much, alright? Bye” she said, and started walking away, and I'm afraid. . .That when she finds out, she will walk away just like that, but when that time comes. . .It will be permanently.

 

I hit the steering wheel with all I have. I stared at myself in the rear view mirror. My eyes are glassy, I glanced back at her, she already walked inside the house. Several tears started rolling freely down my cheeks. This time, I just couldn't hold it any longer, and I literally started bawling my eyes out, in my car. I wiped them away, but more kept going down. Just the thought of losing Gwen makes me be this way, I don't want it to happen. . .That's my biggest fear.  

 

Losing her. . .

 

Making her hate me. . .

 

Nothing mattered months ago, before meeting her. But now that she's in my life, I don't want her to leave now. She crawled to my heart in a way that every time I think of her being hurt or being disappointed, makes my heart ache, makes me want to keep crying.

 

She's beautiful. She's sweet. She's innocent. She doesn't like me for my fame, she likes me for who I am. . .She actually knows me.

 

"Please, forgive me, Gwen, for being such sn idiot" I said aloud. If I could just go and tell her the truth, but there's never the right time. How do you say something like this to someone? Especially when this person is pregnant? Like seriously, is already enough that she needs to give birth. Now, there's girls talking shit about her, when she doesn't even have the fault. Plus, she doesn't know that I'm the one who lied about me being the father, I bet she will be heartbroken. I'm crying harder by now, I stared at my reflection in the mirror. Eyes red and puffy, nose red as a tomato, my tear-stained cheeks were warm. My head starts hurting and pounding hard due to so much crying.

 

I hit the steering wheel one more time out of frustration. Why is this happening? Why didn't I think of this before!? Why am I such a dickhead?

 

“Idiot, idiot, idiot” I muttered. I stayed parked in front of her house for a while, to calm down. There's no way I'm driving like this. But as I waited, and I stared at her house, it makes me feel even worse. She's inside, totally clueless of what is happening, she doesn't know I'm still here, crying my eyes out, for her. . .

 

I don't know how long I've been here, I lost count. I wiped the few tears I had left and turned on the engine. I took a deep breath, and tried to calm down. I started driving out of the neighborhood, thinking of everything we've been together.

 

***

 

“I never met such a beautiful girl like you. . .” I said as I saw her blushing.

 

She scoffed for some reason towards my comment. “You have like a million fans, I suppose you meet thousands every day, and you tell me I'm the most beautiful girl you've ever met? C'mon, be more realistic” her giggle was so cute.

 

“I'm serious” I moved an inch closer. “What's your name, pretty face?”

 

“Gwen. . .Just Gwen” she said timidly.

 

“Well, Gwen, I'm Finn. . .Just Finn” I said and kissed the top of her hand.

 

***

 

"What do you want to talk about?" she asked and crossed her arms across her chest. Annoyance all over her face.

 

“When did you found out about this? And why didn't you tell me before?” I asked.

 

“I found out last week, the same day my brother went to look for you. That means I couldn't have told you before, since I figured it out the same time you did, and why would you care anyway, huh? Aren't you too busy caring about yourself?” she said, sending me a deathly glare.

 

“I'm not like that, Gwen” I said, trying to soften my voice.

 

“Oh really? You sure about that? I'm actually surprised you remember my name for starters. If you actually cared for me, you would've called me a month ago after that night. But no, I was just a one-time thing”

 

“That's what pisses me the most. You spend one night, just one night with girl and have sex, and then they think they're dating. You girls need a reality check” I said raising my voice a little.

 

“Do you realize how much of a jerk you're being right now?” she asked as she furrowed her eyebrows. I let go heavy sigh, shaking my head. I looked at her, our faces just mere inches from each other.

 

“I'm trying not to be. . .But you're so damn complicated” I said.

 

She huffed. “You know what? I don't care. . .I'm out of here. You got what you wanted and now look who's the one suffering. I'm just 17 Finn! I can't have a baby. I just can't”

 

“Don't you think you're overreacting?” I asked. She gasped in shock, hurt was plastered across her delicate face. Before I know it, she slapped me across my face with such force, I know her fingers will get marked.

 

***

 

“Finn, I—” I couldn't let her finish that sentence as I instantly crashed my lips with hers. She looked so beautiful and irresistible, it was hard not to, it was so hard to deny the fact that I truly wanted her lips on mine. But this time, we weren’t drunk. This time. . .I did felt this kiss.

 

***

I am such an idiot. . .

Chapter 46 - The Baby's Possible Future

Gwen's P.O.V

 

“Mom, I'm home!” I called out for her. No answer. I walked into the kitchen and grabbed an apple from the counter, taking a bit. I sat in one of the stools, when suddenly, I heard footsteps coming down the stairs. My mom entered the kitchen, wearing a white dress, her hair pulled back into a fancy ponytail, her typical red lipstick, her Gucci purse in one hand, and the car keys in the other.

 

“Hello, sweetie” she said with a sweet smile. I waved at her, biting my apple. “Shall we?”

 

“Where are we going?” I asked, furrowing my eyebrows in confusion.

 

“To the Doctor, I made an appointment for you right now, that's why I was worried that you weren't going to be here on time”

 

“Oh, alright, I was actually going to ask you to make me an appointment” I said as I got out of the stool.

 

“I'm your mother, honey, I know what you will ask for even before you have the time to ask me about it” she winked and patted my shoulder. I chuckled and nodded in agreement, she is right though.

 

I grabbed my jacket and purse from the counter and followed my mom to her car. I buckled in and turned on the radio, the new song from Selena Gomez was the background.

 

“So, how was your day?” she asked, in an attempt of starting s conversation. I smiled and tilted my head sideways to have a better look of her. Her gaze was focused on the road.

 

I shrugged it off, “Fine, I guess” I said, though it was sort of a lie, if you know what I mean. I don't think is a good idea for her to know about Nash and I now that she's driving. Like, I bet she will be so shocked she will crash directly to a tree; a scene I would like to avoid. I crossed my arms across my chest and stared out the window.

 

“Come on, honey. . .You're a teenager, nothing exciting happened?”

 

“Well, I woke up today, and realize I'm still pregnant, I think that qualifies as something interesting, am I right?” I didn't want to sound like that, I might be a little too sensitive. But lately, I've been that way, and I hate it so freaking much.

 

She chuckled. “I was this exact way when I was pregnant with you and your brother. Moody all the time”

 

“I'm sorry, mom, I didn't mean—”

 

“No, baby, I get it. . .Really. I understand that being pregnant is such a challenge, that's why, we need to talk about what happens after”

 

“After what?” I asked, furrowing my eyebrows in confusion.

 

“When you give birth, Gwen. . .” she let go a heavy sigh.

 

“Do we have to talk about it now?”

 

“And when do you plan to talk about it Gwen, when you are in the hospital bed, holding your child?”

 

I cringed at that word. Child. God, every time I hear that it makes me more nervous than usual. With just the plain thought that soon I’ll be carrying in my bare hands a person that came out of me. Oh, my God. Someone I made, inside of me. A real little person; with a delicate face, with fingers, with feet, with a mouth, with a nose. When I think of it, my stomach does a major backflip.

 

“I know it's hard, but that day will come pretty soon actually, and you need to have a plan”

 

“We need to talk with Finn too and—”

 

“You mean that hobo that started this in the first place? Don't even think about it, Gwen. I told you not to talk to him ever again and I hope you're keeping your promise” she said, her tone cold.

 

If only she knew.

 

So telling her that I practically see him and talk to him every day is off the table, right?

 

“What are you suggesting?” I asked, trying to change the subject as quick as possible. She composed herself, and glanced at me briefly.

 

“Adoption” she said finally after several minutes of pure silence. "Someone that can take care of this child with love and responsibility"

“I've been thinking the same thing, but who would want a baby made by an irresponsible teenager?” I asked.

 

“A lot of people, sweetie. People that unfortunately can't have a baby. . .People that will be more than grateful if you picked them to have your baby” she parked the car outside this huge building with a lot of glass windows. “Leave it all to me, I'll take care of everything” she said and got out of the car, I did too and followed her inside, letting her work her magic.

 

Soon, a nurse came towards us and told us to wait outside in the waiting room, since our doctor was finishing with a patient. I fidgeted with my fingers, occasionally glancing at some women sitting next to me, staring at me with sympathy, which made me get annoyed, of course. I hate that kind of look—which by the way, I've been getting a lot lately—sympathy, sorry, pity, disappointment. I hate the fact that I slept with someone, lost my virginity with one guy, and I have to carry my mistake with me, I have to carry the evidence everywhere I go.

 

My mom sensed my uneasiness, and gently placed her delicate hand on my knee, giving it a little squeeze.

 

Suddenly, a wooden door opened, two women coming out, saying goodbye with a hug. This middle aged woman with blonde hair, messy bun, and bright red nails, was holding a notepad with her, checking something.

 

“Gwen Davery? Do we have a Gwen Davery?” she called out. Mom and I soon stood up and walked towards her.

“Doctor McNamara?” my mom said, greeting her with a handshake. She smiled politely, her gaze fell in me, then to my stomach, of course. . .Lately, everyone I meet had greeted me with that way actually. First face then straight to my stomach. I got so used to it, I don't even know if I should just get mad or let it go, either way, I am still the same way. Either way, they will still see this huge stomach, so why bother, right?

 

We walked inside her office, the smell of mint and cinnamon soon hit my nostrils. I sat at one of the black chairs in front of her desk, my mom sat in the other next to mine. Dr. McNamara sat in her chair and checked something in her computer before turning back to us. I stared at all the diplomas hanging on the wall, the scented candles in one corner, and the decorative plants in another. Then my view dropped to the picture in her desk. Dr. McNamara was there, with her husband and two kids. I couldn't help but smiling slightly.

 

“So” she started, which made me bring my attention back to her. “We're just going to do some tests to see if your baby is in good conditions—”

 

“And what if it's not?” the words stumbled out of my mouth without me wanting to. She shifted in her chair, looking nothing but clamed and peaceful. It made my nervousness go away just one bit.

 

“What if it's not what?” she asked, furrowing her eyebrows in confusion.

 

“What if my baby is not fine” I asked, scared all of a sudden. A lot of thoughts were running through my head that precise moment. What if he/she is not fine at all? What if something went wrong? What if he/she got hurt or something? Are these all the concerned thoughts moms go through when giving birth? It's awful. . .

 

“We hope for the best, darling. We will just run some tests in you, and that will determine if your baby is doing a great job” her voice was nothing but calmed, so soft and sweet. Thinking back in the picture I just saw, she does have the face of a mother, it does look like she knows what she's doing.

 

I nodded slowly, swallowing the lump in my throat. My mother, beside me send me a sympathetic look, and smiled sweetly at me; that sort of put me at ease, but just slightly. There was still this feeling in the pit of my stomach: Fear and anxiousness.

 

Everything will be alright. . .I believe that. I know things will be okay. I slowly followed the doctor to a dark room, my mom close behind me. Thank God, she's here, I know I wouldn't be able to do this on my own.

 

I lied in the bed of that small room. There were a lot of machines, and it was too dark. I raised my shirt, revealing my stomach. Doctor McNamara stared at for a bit, smiling. I felt sort of uncomfortable to expose myself that way, but then again, she's a Doctor and knows what she's doing.

 

She started putting some sort of Vaseline in my stomach, while analyzing something in her computer, glancing back at me from time to time. Suddenly, an image popped up, which made my mom gasp, a smile plastered across her face.

 

“What!? Why are you shocked!? Is something wrong?” I asked exasperated. They both stared at me, they looked nothing but unconcerned.

 

“Gwen, that's your baby” Dr. McNamara pointed at the big screen. I stared at it, still not believing my eyes. It looked beautiful.

 

After half an hour of tests after tests, I was free to go, though I still had another appointment next week. When we got to the car, I buckled in and stared at my mom, who was turning pn the engine. I stared at the photo they took of my baby, the little person inside of me. I'm sure Nash will love to see this picture.

 

“Now, we have to do something else. . .” she said.

 

“What?” I asked, furrowing my eyebrows in confusion. “Where?”

 

“I did some calls. . .”

 

“And? Where are you going with this, mom?”

 

“I found this cute couple that is willing to adopt” she said, a smile on her face. I was taken aback for a second. I mean, without consulting me? Yeah, I was indeed planning to put my baby in adoption, but I also said that it's best if Finn gets involved. I mean, it's his baby too.

 

“Mom, you should've asked me about it first before contacting them” I said, raising my voice a little. "I know you're trying to help, but don't you think that you should've warned me the plans you had for my baby before just going behind my back contacting strangers that may or may not be good for this baby” I said, caressing my growing stomach. “A heads up, a warning, time, something, you know?”

 

She sighed, glancing at me for a second before focusing on the road again, “I know, sweetie, and I'm sorry. . .But, I thought you made up your mind about the adopting thing, that you decided that you were going to go on with this. You are 17, and that stomach is just getting bigger. In not so much, a new born baby is going to open her or his eyes. That baby needs parents, adult parents that can take care of her or him, I thought you understood that”

 

“Mom, of course I understand that. But, I also told you that I wanted to tell Finn about it. He has a say on it”

 

She stopped the car abruptly, making me jump in fear. "Are you out of your mind!? Why did you stopped like that" I asked exasperated. She stared at me for a moment before shaking her head.

 

“What did I tell you about having that-that punk knowing about this? I told you not to hang out with him, he has no right to have an opinion in this baby thing. We are going through the adoption procedure, and I don't care if he actually has anything to say about this. It is your baby—”

 

“But is his baby too” I cut her off.

 

“Gwen, it doesn't matter!” she said, raising her voice. "Is he here? I don't think so. So why don't you just—”

 

“He's not here, because you don't want him to be. Don't you think he actually cares for this? Do you think he ran away like you predicted? He didn't mother! He stayed. . .For me”

 

“You've been hanging out with him" she said, more to herself. “Gwen, I specifically told you—”

 

“I know what you said, and I'm sorry I disobeyed you, but I had to”

 

“Why? What can he do to erase what he had already done?” she asked.

 

“Nothing, that's the thing mother, what's done is done. And you can either hang on to that hatred or let it go, and I don't want to live with that kind of emotion towards one person”

 

“Look what he did to you” she said, her voice cracking, she was fighting not to cry, but was failing miserably.

 

“I know, I am pretty aware of what he did, but mom. . .I said, grabbing her hands. "He is different from the rest, he truly is. He didn't leave like you said. . .Doesn't that tells you something about how he is. He offered to help me multiple times, he supports me and-and proves to me that he cares”

 

“Do you. . .Do you actually feel something for him?” she asked. I took a moment to think about it, I stared at my mother for a few minutes, before smiling.

 

“I do, mom, I really do”

 

She let go a heavy sigh, eyeing me for a moment. “Okay” she simply said.

 

“Okay what?” I asked, furrowing my eyebrows in confusion.

 

“If he makes you happy, I don't see why I should be in the way" she said, and kissed the top of my head. "I don't care if you're 17, 23, or even 40, you will always be my little angel. And I just can't stand the fact you're being hurt”

 

“Something tells me I will be just fine” I said with a reassuring smile. She nodded and hugged me tightly.

 

“Do you still want to meet the couple?” she asked. I fidgeted with my fingers for a moment before locking gazes with her again. I nodded slowly, a small smile to reassure her that I'll go along with her.

 

“But, I'll have to tell Finn eventually, maybe he understands, you know?”

 

“Probably, but boys are too confusing. And then they say that is complicated to understand us, the funny part is that every time that we have to talk to them is like solving a riddle” she said, which made me laugh. “Take your time, sweetie, we're just interviewing some people, he doesn't need to know right now, okay? Not until we're sure” I nodded knowingly and saw her starting the engine again.

 

Next stop: My baby's possible future.

Finn's P.O.V

 

I started pacing around the room, waiting for a call, a text, smoke signs, something to know if Gwen was alright. I sat down on the couch, and took out my phone. I was fearing opening any of my social medias by now. There's always a new comment a new video, a fucking video, for the love of God! I tried calming them down but is not working. I'm scared shitless of what will happen if Gwen, my Gwen figured out about this. How will she react! Will she forgive me for this? Will she still be with me? My relationship is on the line here.

 

I tried telling her every time, but the words don't come. When she's resting her head on my shoulder, when we watch movies and she gets sad with the ending, it's adorable. When she's angry and scrunches her nose and furrows her eyebrows, her blue eyes opening so big. Those moments I've been with her, were the most amazing ones. If I lose her, I know I wouldn't be able to make it. . .If she leaves, she would take my broken heart with her.

 

At this point, I just want to punch the wall multiple times until I break my own God damn knuckles, cause that's what I deserve, for being a lying bastard.

 

I heard my phone buzzing, I sighed in relief when I saw Gwen's name on the screen.

 

Gwen:

 

Hey handsome! Just got out of the Hospital, everything is fine :)

 

I smiled, God I was scared. Lately I've been so sacred of everything, of every one. I need to plan how to tell her, because I know, there's no doubt, that it won't be easy.

 

Chapter 47 - Meeting the Couple

My mom parked the car in front of a very nice house, not too big but not too small, it seemed just the okay size. I took a deep breath as I got out of the car, embracing myself for what was about to come. My mom knocked the door, and stepped back waiting for someone to answer.

 

The door slowly opened, revealing a middle aged woman, tall, brunette, her green eyes held such sparkle, she was a beautiful woman.

 

“Hello, I am Kate Davery, this is my daughter Gwen, are you Erin Brown?” my mother asked. The gorgeous woman, with a smile on her perfect full of make-up face, nodded.

 

“I spoke to you on the phone about adoption”

 

“Yeah! Yeah, please come in, I've been waiting with my-with my husband” she was nervous, I could tell. I thought it was pretty adorable that she was nervous about having an interview with me, just a 17 year-old. But, if she truly wants my baby, she needs to earn it. I can't just give it away to anyone.

 

We entered, the house was gorgeous, and so well decorated. Paintings and pictures frame were hanging on the walls, put with nice gold frames. Wooden white and gold furniture, the floor was of marble. She guided us to the living room, where very politely offered us something to drink.

 

“I'm fine with just water, if that's okay?” I asked, my throat was kind of dry. Erin smiled at me, even her smile was so. . .Motherly. But we need to get down to the questions.

 

“Of course!” she said, and we heard her heels clicking hard as she walked towards the kitchen. My mother placed her hand on my back, and caressed it, kissing my head. I smiled at her, and fidgeted with my fingers as I waited Erin to return. When she came back, she handed me the cold glass of water, which I gladly took. It was so refreshing and I instantly felt much better.

 

“So” she started, sitting at the couch across from us. “My husband is on his way home from work, he'll be here any minute now” she said, her voice was sort of shaky, I could sense her nervousness.

 

“You have a lovely home” I complimented, to lighten the mood.

 

“Aw, thank you dear” she said just as a horn sounded outside. “That must be Henry”

 

A tall man appeared in the door, with a suit and a suitcase. His eyes were just as Finn's color, penetrating brown eyes. His dark brunette hair was combed, all shiny and short, some strands being gray. He smiled politely at us, and nodded as a greeting as he walked towards us. All three of us stood up.

 

“Good evening” he said, shaking our hands. My mom and I exchanged some looks and smiled at Henry.

 

We all sat back down and waited for a few minutes in silence, until Erin spoke up. “Kate, Gwen, I bet you guys have some questions for us” she said and delicately grabbed her husband's hand, giving it a little squeeze.

 

My mom looked at me, “Gwen?”

 

“What?” I asked, furrowing my eyebrows in confusion. Was this my turn to speak? I thought my mom was going to do the talking. . . “Don't you have any questions for them?”

 

I gulped the lump in my throat. I don't have only like three questions; I have like millions. But, how could I speak to them right now, I can't even move as I'm there, totally shocked. I didn't know I was going to come here in the first place, or that I was going to meet these people, that are obviously eager and nervous of getting my baby. If my mom would've warned me earlier, I would've of course come prepared, but I got nothing. I just have mixed questions roaming around my head. This types of decisions shouldn't be made by a freaking 17 year-old, but I guess I have to grow up once and for all. . .

 

“Gwen? You alright?” my mother asked. I blinked repeatedly, waking up from my trance.

 

“Y-yeah, I was just. . .I was just asking myself how can I start? What question out of all the ones I have, can I ask first?”

 

“We actually have the entire afternoon, dear?” she said.

 

“Alright” I sighed heavily, taking a deep breath. "I will start by the basic then. . .What do you guys do for living?" I asked possibly the simplest question ever, but it could be counted like a warming up, since of course, I'm not going to be done for this interview too soon. I want to know to who am I leaving this baby.

 

"I am an Interior Designer" Erin replied, very proudly. Now I understand why the house looks so gorgeous, she has such an amazing taste.

 

“And I am an accountant, but I love to volunteer in my free time to manage projects to help people in other countries with less resources than us” he said. Wow, he seems like the type of person that could think of others other than himself.

 

I nodded as my only response, I must admit, those are fantastic jobs, and what I love the most about them, is that they seem so. . .United. I would hate it if this baby didn't have both of the parents.

 

Question after question, I lost count of how long we've been in this exact living room, talking and talking non-stop.

 

“Gwen, I actually do have a question for you, if it's not a bother, of course” Erin asked. I folded my arms across my chest, and nodded.

 

“Go ahead, you can ask anything you want”

 

“Do you know where is the father?” she asked. I exchanged some looks with my mom, who was nothing but quiet. I kept fidgeting with my fingers, hesitant of my words for a slight second. I don't want to talk about Finn right now, because I know they would like to meet him. But, if I don't say that I know the father, they might think I'm just a slut who slept with a random guy in a drunken night—I know what you're thinking, so please don't, ugh. . .

 

I am an idiot? Yeah, such an idiotic and pathetic human being, who should've been more careful. But, it doesn't matter how many times I repeat the same thing—or close my eyes tightly, thinking this is a nightmare—everything happened, and now I'm sitting in front of this expecting couple, who are desperately trying to get a baby of their own, but unfortunately can't.

 

“He couldn't come today” I said, smiling sadly.

 

“Oh, maybe we could meet him one of these days. . .It wouldn't feel right to keep talking about this without the actual father getting involved”

 

Dammit.

 

I gulped the lump in my throat, anxious all of a sudden. I nodded slowly, and tried my best to smile, though it was so forced I think they noticed. I have no idea how will he react when he finds out about this. Will he let me do it? Will he be pissed? Will he agree? All these constant questions wandering in my brain make me feel exhausted. I just wanted to go to bed and pretend—like I always try to do—that this isn't happening. But, of course, this is indeed happening, and I can wish over and over for this to stop right now; truth is, the day I give birth is right around the corner, and unless I grow up and accept it once and for all, I will keep living with all this pressure, with all this overwhelming life of mine.

 

“Yeah, maybe” I said finally after what seemed like forever. They had a look of satisfaction in their faces, as well as excited smiles, it made me feel even worse for them. They're ready to be parents, yet they can't, it's so unfair. It's horrible that me, being just a teenager, can have a baby, and them. . .Experienced, responsible, well mannered, and sweet people, can't. Life is so unfair for everyone. We all stood up and shook hands, we thanked them receiving us. Though my mom was aiming to towards the door, I didn't, which made her look at me.

 

“I want you guys to have my baby” I said. They exchanged some looks, my mom slowly walked towards me.

 

“You don't have to decide now; this is a big deal. Perhaps there are more families you want to interview?” Erin said, though it seemed like she was in the verge of tears. She held her husband's hand tightly, which made me smile as I watched how close they are—and that's what I want for my baby. Loving parents that will unconditionally transmit good values and love, support and education. I want my baby to be happy.

 

“I don't need to interview more people because I already made up my mind” I said, sighing. “These hours we spend talking and asking questions, made me realize that you two are the type of parents any kid would love and dream to have. You're dedicated, loving, caring, and most of all. . .You actually care for each other, I couldn't stop noticing how Henry was glancing at you with so much adoration, it was beautiful. I want for this baby parents that are like that, that can teach he or her to love and be generous with others. I believe you will become great parents” I said. Erin burst in tears and hugged me, trying not to do it too tightly because of my stomach. I wrapped my arms around her, smiling. When she pulled away, she covered her mouth with both of her hands, her nose and cheeks were tinted red due to the crying. Her husband wrapped his arms from behind her, resting his chin on top of her hair.

 

“Thank you so much” she said under her breath, but I heard it loud enough. I nodded and grabbed my mom's hand, leaving towards the main door. With one last wave, we walked outside. I let go a heavy sigh, and opened the passenger's door. My mom didn't turn the engine on quite yet, she kept looking at me.

 

“You really liked them” she said.

 

“Yeah, I saw in them what I truly want. . .I don't need to see someone else. Though I have to talk to Finn about this, I'm just afraid of how he will react” I let go a heavy sigh, fidgeting with my fingers. My mom patted my knee, giving me an encouraging smile.

 

“You will find the right words; I know you will” she said. I nodded, folding my arms, and stared out the window. The right words, huh? This will just be harder than I thought. Though I feel that Finn will probably be happy with all this. I mean, it's basically a win-win situation. I can give the baby to someone that can actually care for him/her. Nobody finds out about this, and I can end my studies and go to College. Well, easier said than done, but I can try at least. I just can't cease to imagine all the possible things he will say, his reaction, everything.

 

God, how can I even start a conversation with the subject of adoption?

Chapter 48 - Lies Unfold

Finn's P.O.V

 

@FinnHarries: She's NOT my girlfriend! And that baby is not mine. As I said: She's just a friend who happens to be pregnant with a baby that is obviously not mine. I'm too young to be a dad anyway.

 

@FinnHarries: Girls, calm down, I'm not a dad.

 

@FinnHarries: WE'RE NOT DATING, AND THAT BABY'S NOT MINE!! Geez.

 

@FinnHarries: How many times I have to say that I'm not dating anyone!? I'm single like a pringle ready to. . .Mingle ;) Lol.

 

I re-read all those awful tweets I had written. Why am I so stupid!? I could delete them, but people could get suspicious, plus they already read it. I watched those videos they were making, and honestly, this is getting out of control. I stared at the picture I took of Gwen when she was resting her head on my shoulder. Even when she sleeps she looks so beautiful. I can't believe why do I always have to mess everything up.

 

I let go a heavy sigh and stared at the ceiling, I had planned to make a video, but nothing makes sense anymore. I don't want to do any of those things after I saw all these girls talking shit. But then again, this is all my fault. I basically encouraged them to do so. Since I didn't say the truth, they just started thinking Gwen is a whore, which she's not. The guilt and the pain is eating me alive, and I can't help but feel useless. I want to make things right, but I don't know how. There's nothing I can do that won't affect my career and relationship with Gwen. I'm thinking as hard as I can, but nothing. . .I just want this nightmare to be over already. 

 

Gwen's P.O.V

 

Prom is just three weeks away. . .I am so freaking nervous. I've never felt this anxious before. I can't believe Finn will be my date. I know a lot of girls would die to be in my position right now. I am just so lucky to be attending probably one of the biggest nights of my life, with a really special someone.

 

I started humming a song happily, sighing dreamily as I stared at my precious white dress. I ran my fingertips through the fabric, thinking how he will probably love it just as much as I do.

 

Suddenly, someone barged into my room, making me jump with fear, abruptly turning around, just to see Dani with a frantic expression. “What's wrong!?” I asked concerned as I saw her features. She was angry, I knew whenever she was. Her left eye starts twitching and her breathing starts to get heavy, plus her eyebrows furrow so much they seem like they're about to touch. She was more than furious.

 

“I can't believe what that asshole did to you!” she said. Now I was the one furrowing my eyebrows, confused with her words.

 

“Excuse me?” I asked, folding my arms. She was pacing back and forth in my room, scaring me as she tried to even her breath, it wasn't working. I wanted to hold her, to calm her down, but she didn't want to stop.

 

“Haven't you seen what the father of that baby you're carrying has been saying about you on Twitter?” she asked, and with a bitter laugh she added, “what a fucking coward” I couldn't understand what the hell was she talking about. And the fact that she wouldn't stop going in circles, cursing under her breath, wasn't helping the case. With a feverish movement, she walked towards my bed and sat down, balling her fists.

 

“What is going on?” I asked.

 

“Y-you don't know?” she asked in disbelief.

 

I shook my head. “If I knew why you were so angry, I would be angry along with you, right?”

 

She let go a heavy sigh, resting her arms on her knees for a moment before looking back at me. “Finn fucking Harries has been denying about being the father of the baby”

 

“What?”

 

“On Twitter, they posted a picture of you two walking together, and they noticed you were pregnant. Fans got crazy and started saying that Finn is the father—which is entirely true—but he's been saying that he is not your boyfriend, neither the father of this baby”

 

My world stopped. Everything around me stopped. “That can't be true, Finn would defend us, he could never throw me under the bus. . .He-he isn't like that!” one tear rolled down my cheek, but I quickly wiped it away. Dani stared at me with an apologetic look on her face. “Dani, that can't be true” my voice cracked. I don't want to even think this could be real, that he actually said those things. But then again, Dani would never lie to me about this.

Is that the real reason why he didn't want me to follow him?

 

“I'm so sorry, G. But-but that's not it. . .” she said and stood up, retrieving her phone from her pocket. She typed a few things and then walked towards me, making me face the screen of her phone.

 

“It's one of the multiple videos made by one of his fans, talking about you” she explained. I stayed quiet while I watched attentively.

 

“Hey guys! I am Jenny, and today's video is about this mystery girl we saw accompanying our so loved Finn Harries” she started, and a picture of Finn and I popped in the screen. “Oh, my God, is this really her!? I thought she would be prettier. Of course she's probably this stupid whore seeking for attention. Like girl, please! Get a fucking life” she giggled, while I felt how my heart was pounding hard inside my chest. My hands were shaking and heart was cracking. I could actually hear my poor fragile heart breaking in a billion pieces. Her words are so hurtful, I am not a whore! “Poor Finn, how can he be so dumb to actually hang out with this girl? It's probably just pity. This girl looks like she could be a slut, sleeping around with everyone. I bet she slept with Cameron Phillips and Shawn Mendes too. Oh, my God, perhaps she just wants money! What a bitch. . .”

 

I can't believe this! I forcefully grabbed Dani's phone and got into her account to see Finn's tweets, even though I don't want to, but I just have to know. . .

 

@FinnHarries: She's NOT my girlfriend! And that baby is not mine. As I said: She's just a friend who happens to be pregnant with a baby. I'm too young to be a dad anyway.

 

@FinnHarries: How many times I have to say that I'm not dating anyone!? I'm single like a pringle ready to. . .Mingle ;) Lol.

 

@FinnHarries: It's just a random fan that came to me, nothing happened between us, alright? Expect new video this Friday :)

 

@FinnHarries: Girls, relax, do you think I would be that stupid to actually sleep with a girl like that and then become a dad at just 18? Wow. Do you really believe everything you see online?

 

@FinnHarries: We are NOTHING! Stop with the drama because I am not a dad, neither have a girlfriend at the moment. I'm not that stupid. . .

 

Every tweet, every comment, every picture I saw insulting me, it was too much. Did he really hide all this from me? I remember that day, in the picture, that was like three months ago approximately. He hid this from me, for three months? How could he? Why me? Why, why, why? Why was I so stupid to actually believe that he could possibly have something for me? To actually love me? He's just a conceited asshole that cares more about his 'fame' than me. . .

 

“Gwen—”

 

“Don't try to tell me that everything will be alright because nothing you say can help how I'm feeling right now” I said, countless tears streaming down my cheeks. I caressed my stomach, and felt like punching the wall, but that wouldn't help at all. I broke down, my chest rising up and down, I covered my face with both of my hands and cried, and cried, and cried. Dani hugged me tightly, caressing my back soothingly as she shushed me.

 

After what seemed like forever, I pulled away and tried to take deep breaths, but it was getting hard with this moment, with all these girls' hate. I wanted the ground to swallow me and make me disappear.

 

“Maybe we could—”

 

“I just want to be alone, Dani. Thank you for telling me, but the last thing I want is to be with someone right now, sorry” I said, my voice cracking. She nodded in understanding and gave me one last hug.

 

“I understand, Gwen, take all the time you need” and with that, she left. . .I stayed there, alone in my room, tears kept rolling down, though I tried to calm down. My phone buzzed in my nightstand, and I slowly went to pick it up. I was mentally exhausted, I felt like someone was stabbing me over and over again. My legs were weak and I just wanted to go back in the past and avoid ever talking to Finn fucking Harries.

 

I picked up my phone, I rubbed at my nose and then stared at the Caller's ID.

 

Finn.

 

Finn fucking Harries was calling me. I groaned and frowned at the screen. How is it possible that he still has the nerve of calling me? He should've told me about this sooner, before leading me on, pretending to actually feel something for me. I wanted to smash my phone against the wall, but that wouldn't help my case either. I pressed the phone to my ear, my hand was shaking and lip quivering.

 

“Babe, hey, I was thinking that we could—” he started but of course I wouldn't let him finish, not this time.

 

“Listen to me, Harries. I don't want you to call me ever again, you hear me?”

 

“What?”

 

“Don't play innocence with me, I just can't believe I lost my time with someone as selfish and conceited as you! You are the worst human being I have ever encounter in my entire fucking life!” I said, wiping at my tear stained cheeks, balling my fists as I kept thinking of what he did. Every time it crossed my mind, I felt even more stupid.

 

“What are you talking about—”

 

“You know exactly what I'm talking about, you've known since the beginning, and you didn't have the balls to tell me. You're a coward, you're a fucking coward! I know everything!”

 

He was a moment in silence before answering. “I can explain—”

 

“Don't bother, just don't. . .” my voice failed, and it was breaking. I stared at the ground, trying to even my breath.

 

“Baby, Gwen, listen to me, please—”

 

“Fuck you!” and with that, I hung up. I was breathing heavily, my chest rising up and down. I just had to get out of there. I rushed out my room and to the front door, receiving concerned looks from Alec.

 

“Gwen, wait up!” he said, running towards me. I stopped but didn't turn around. I wiped my eyes and stayed silent.

 

“Gwen, what's wrong? What happened?” he asked trying to make me turn around but I didn't even budge. “Gwen?”

 

“Nothing!” I snapped. “I just need fresh air, okay?”

 

“Something is obviously bothering you and I need to know what is” he said, which made me turn around.

 

“Nothing is wrong with me, I just—” I couldn't finish that sentence as I kept crying, I can't believe how stupid I was, how fucking stupid I was to think that Finn could be different from the rest. Alec hugged me, kissing the top of my head. I cried into his shirt, trying to calm down.

 

“I don't want to talk about it, okay?” I said, when we pulled away. He nodded, but that didn't take away the concern on his face.

 

“Come on, I can make you my special milkshake just for you” he said, but I shook my head at his offer. I wasn't in the mood for milkshakes—surprisingly—I needed to get out of this house, to get my mind off that brown-eyed boy.

“It sounds very appealing, but I truly want to get fresh air” I said, he nodded and hugged me one last time. I forced a smile, to make him stop worrying about me. I can't stand to see him looking at me like that, specially not in the situation I'm in. I walked towards the entrance and finally got out. The wind blowing at my face, it made me feel slightly better, but not enough. The stinging in my chest doesn't stop and I just want to escape from all this, but I can't, I'm into deep to actually disappear.

 

I started walking, where? Don't ask me, I just don't have the answer. I just want to clear my mind, to get my head out of here for just a moment. But, the constant reminder that Finn basically betrayed me, replayed in my head like a scratched CD. God, I want it to stop. I received multiple looks from people, but you know what? I couldn't care less. I know I looked like crap, but I have a reason for it, I have my personal life, and the fact people were staring at me and judging me with their looks, annoyed the living hell out of me. With folded arms and tear stained cheeks, I kept walking. With time I will get my answers as to where I should be, where I should go, what should I do. Though I know one thing, one specific thing. . .I don't want to hear from Finn fucking Harries ever again.

 

Chapter 49 - This Isn't Over

Finn's P.O.V

 

Fuck.

 

Fuck.

 

Fuck.

 

This can't be happening. . .Not like this, God no. I can't believe she knows everything. I mean, I knew it was coming, but I should've been the one to tell her about this. I should've told her that I was stupid for posting that, for lying to millions of people, I should've told her that I was sorry, that I would make it up to her. And then this happened, just like Cameron predicted. I am such an asshole. I am a disgusting person, a lying bastard, a conceited jerk, a selfish idiotic, and pathetic human being. God, I hate myself so much right now. But, not as much as she hates me in this exact moment.

 

Half of my mind tells me I should give her time, to let her cool down. After hearing her curse like that—which she never does—I should just stay away for a few days before speaking to her again. But the other stubborn part of me tells me that I should go to her house right now and apologize for my fucked up actions, to explain to her that I do actually care for her, a lot.

 

Before I know it, I'm grabbing my car keys and rushing out the door. I kept thinking in all of the things I could say, anything that can make this any better. But then I started thinking what an idiot I am since there's no fucking way I can make this situation improve. She hates me, I know, she doesn't want to know anything about me, I felt it in her voice. I got inside my car, and hit the steering wheel.

 

“Dammit!” I screamed out in frustration. “Shit, what am I doing?” I asked aloud. I scratched the back of my head and started the engine, driving as fast as I could to Gwen's house. I grabbed my phone and dialed her number. I left her like 7 missed calls, 2 voicemails, and 5 text messages, but nothing. She didn't answer me at all.

 

• • •

 

When I got there, I bolted towards the main door as fast as my legs would allow me to. I rang the doorbell and basically pounded on the door multiple times. Minutes later, Alec opened it, giving me a confused look.

 

“I need to speak to Gwen” I said, urgently.

 

He folded his arms, “Gwen's not here” was his reply.

 

“Where is she?” I asked, getting annoyed with every passing second.

 

“She wanted fresh air so she went for a walk. You don't know what is going on with her? Because she was crying and pissed. If you know anything, you have to tell me”

 

“If I tell you, you would kill me” I said. He furrowed his eyebrows in confusion and his arms fell to his sides.

 

“Excuse me? What did you say? I swear if you did anything to my little sister you will pay for it”

 

“I know, but I truly need to talk to her, I am just as worried as you are for her. . .And if I don't find her, everything will get worst”

 

“Can you please explain what the fuck is going on? You are getting on my nerves, Harries” he said, through gritted teeth.

 

“There's not time to explain, alright? I have to find your sister" I started walking towards my car and quickly got in, receiving multiple confused looks by Alec, but I didn't have time right now. I only have one mission: Finding Gwen. I always needed to mess everything up, why am I such an idiot? If I would've told her the truth, then none of this would've happen, she would still be here, with me.

 

I searched nearly everywhere, but nothing, she's nowhere to be found and I'm getting worried. Where the hell would she go?

 

Dammit. Dammit. Dammit.

 

If I was a heartbroken girl, where would I go? I squeezed my brain trying to think of all the possibilities for where to search. I am worried sick, I mean, I know she's crying right now, I feel it. Of course, I knew she would get upset—even more than that—if she would ever find out. But, if she is crying and hurt right now, anyone could take advantage of that opportunity. A broken girl, a pregnant broken girl, suffering. She's too vulnerable right now to go wander in the streets alone.

 

I just pray that she's okay and doesn't get hurt because of my stupidity.

 

Gwen's P.O.V

 

I inhale the fresh air and closed my eyes tightly, as I enjoyed of the peacefulness. I believed the park would be the perfect place—the perfect quiet place, for me to think. I wiped my eyes, few tears escaping from it. The stinging in my chest is nearly unbearable, and I can't help to think how stupid I was. All those moments I've shared with him, with Nash, are rushing to my mind all of a sudden.

When he looks at me, when he smiles, when he hugs me, was it all lie? I can't believe him. . .I can't believe how he played me like that. I truly thought we had something, that he actually felt something for me. And that makes my heart ache even more. I was so dumb to believe that he could have feelings for a simple girl like me, when he already has like every single girl in the palm of his hand. 

I was sitting in a bench, staring as the little kids played in the swings or running around, plus some couples walking by holding hands.

I wish that this pain could go away. I hate that I let him lead me on. I wanted to scream at him, to insult him, to even punch him. I wanted to do a million things. . .But most of all, I just wish I could forget him. I wanted to forget his dazzling eyes, his warm hugs, his tender kisses. Ugh, I wanted to forget our first night together. I should've just walk away the minute he sat down next to me.

“Gwen?” I heard someone from behind me. I didn't have to turn around to know who it was.

“Finn, leave” I said weakly.

“I was worried sick” he said and stood in front of me. I looked up, his hair was all messy like if he ran his fingers in it several times, and had a concerned look on his face.

“What do you want?” I tried to stay as calm as possible, I truly didn't want to make a scene right here in the public's eye. He stared at his surroundings before looking back at me.

“I want to explain” he said. I stood up from the bench, trying to control my anger. I started walking away but he grabbed my hand, not allowing me to move any further. I glared at him, and tried to get away from his grip, but he didn't budge.

“Let go off my arm, Finn. Now” I said, trying to sound as menacing as possible. I didn't want to see him, because I knew I would end up crying again, and that's the last thing I wanted to do. He stared at me for a moment, but still he wouldn't let go. He pulled me a bit closer to him and closed his eyes briefly before looking back at me.

“I am so—” he stopped for a moment, taking a long sigh. "I am so fucking sorry, Gwen. I never planned on hurting you like that. . .Everything just got off hands, and–and—"

“You thought that keeping your reputation was more important than me, right?” I said and forcefully got out of his grip. I don't know what the hell does he think he's going to get here, apologizing? What he did is already done, and it doesn't matter what he says or does, I can't even look at him without feeling disgusted. I stared at the ground, but soon he brought my chin up for me to face him. I closed my eyes tightly, one tear rolled down my cheek.

Hurt.

Pain.

Betrayal.

My heart cracked in a billion pieces as I picture him smiling to himself while writing those tweets, while lying to all of his fans. I am furious, sad, broken. . .He made me believe I was special, that he was actually into me. He made me believe that those moments we had. . .Meant something. But here I am, crying pathetically in front of the only boy in my entire life, that made me be head over heels but at the same time, heartbroken. . .

“Gwen, please don't cry—”

“What do you want me to do then!?” I screamed exasperated, as I backed away from him. “Do you expect to see me dancing around happy with life after you lied to me? After you made me go through this? So, not only you made me pregnant, but also you say those horrible things behind my back and expect me to be alright? It doesn't fucking work like that, Finn, it doesn't!” I folded my arms, he tried to walk towards me but I raised my hand for him to stop. “And to top it all off, you come here when I clearly told you not to talk to me ever again. Seriously, what is wrong with you?”

“I came here to explain to you, Gwen” he said, his eyes were glassy, but you know what? I won't put up with his bullshit anymore.

“Explain what, huh? You are so unbelievable! I can't believe I ever wasted my time with you. . .”

“You deserve an explanation, babe—”

“Don't you fucking dare call me babe. I am not your babe, Finn”

“Gwen, listen—”

“Oh, my God, is that why you gave me this necklace?” I asked as I touched it. I ripped it off my neck and held it in front of him. “You gave it to me because you wanted to butter me up?” I asked, angry tears were now streaming down my cheeks. “But you know what? You're right, is not your fault, is my fault for allowing you into my life, for ever giving you a chance, for ever talking to you in that bar. Everything is my fault” I stared at the golden heart shaped necklace and threw it to the ground. “I don't want it any more, I don't want to see the proof of my stupidity”

“Bab–Gwen, don't say that, don't ever say that. . .Please, just—” one tear rolled down his cheek, but he quickly wiped it away. I tried not to feel compassion over seeing him like this, I need to stand my ground and be firm. He hurt me, I shouldn't show weakness.

“Cut the act, Finn, we both know you don't feel that way. . .You just got what you wanted. Taking a girl's virginity, have some fun, and then poof! Out of your life. I'm sure you never expected bumping with the girl you had sex with one month later, pregnant if may I add. So, please, don't act like you care”

“I do fucking care, Gwen! I do, I do, I fucking do. All this time I was trying to protect you”

“From what? Are you sure you weren't trying to protect yourself?" I asked. This time he didn't wipe the tears that were now running down his cheeks. It was so weird to see him in this state, but I still needed to be strong and not let myself get persuaded with this blue-eyed boy who can't stop popping into my mind.

“I was trying to protect you from this" he said motioning at myself. "I can't stand seeing you in this much pain”

“If you don't like to see it, then why did you cause it?” I asked, trying to lower my voice. “I really want you to go”

“Yeah, you will come with me” he stated, taking a step towards me. I shook my head, taking a step back. I won't go with him; I don't want to be near him anymore. I fucking want him out of my life.

“What part of no don't you get, huh? How can you even think I want to be anywhere with you after this? You are seriously so messed up, just as messed up as your million followers” I said bitterly.

“You can't insult them like that, thanks to them I am where I am”

“Yeah, sure, alright, but also made you the fucked up person you are too” I let go a heavy sigh. “I don't mean to trash them, because I know they don't have the fault, you do. This all happened because of you. You seduced me, you came back to me claiming that you're a good person and that I should give you a chance. You are here now, trying to convince me that is not your fault when it is”

“I take responsibility for everything, Gwen. I didn't mean to cause you this. I planned to tell you multiple times. But, whenever I saw you smiling, or laughing, or the way you looked at me with such adoration in those beautiful and dazzling hazel eyes you have, it became 100x harder to do so. Every time I knew you would walk away from me, and hell I was right. I was fucking right”

“And I ask you again: What do you think was going to happen? That I would be happy for the fact you lied to me, and let your fans—who have no fucking clue of who I am—trash me like that?”

“It got out of hands, I didn't expect it was going to turn out like that, I swear!” he said raising his voice.

“Well, assuming things will never get you anywhere” I said, shaking my head. “If you don't go, then I will, cause this conversation is fucking over” I said and turned on my heels to leave. I heard his footsteps close behind me, so I turned around, just to be bumped with his hard chest.

“You can't leave me, Gwen” his voice cracked, and for a moment it pained me to see him that way. No, I can't soften at him, I am angry and upset, and showing him that watching him this way affects me, he might use it against me. I tried to back away, but he moved his hands to my hips, not letting me go. “I don't want it to end this way. I'll–I'll do anything! Anything for you, baby” he cried. I had to look away as I kept crying myself. And it might look weird watching these two people crying in the middle of the park, but you know what? I couldn't care less.

“There's nothing—and hear me clearly—absolutely nothing you can do or say, that can somehow change the way I feel about you right now” I said and pushed at his chest, to gain some space between us. Hurt was clear in his features as he tried to compose himself.

"Gwen, please" he said and kneeled in the floor, in front of me. He hugged my legs tightly not wanting to let go. It felt weird seeing him like this, doing this. This messes with my head even more, and I truly want him to stop. I looked down at him, and then at my surroundings. The sound of his crying against my legs was our only background for a moment.

“Finn, get up” I said, more like pleaded. But, he just shook his head and kept breaking down in front of me. “Get up, Finn, right now. Please” I said, biting my lower lip. He looked up at me, his bloodshot eyes looked brighter for some reason, his face reddened, and eyebrows were knitted together.

“Don't go” he said almost inaudible, but I heard it clearly. I shook my head and caressed his hair, he closed his eyes for a moment, somehow appreciating my gesture, but I quickly stopped.

“I can't do this. . .” I said, more like a whisper. “You have no idea how hurt I feel right now”

“Believe me, I know the feeling” he said. He stood up from the ground and held my face with both of his hands. With his thumb wiped a few tears that were coming out of my eyes, caressing my cheeks with his warm hand. I closed my eyes, I love it when he touches me like that. But, then I opened them again, and pulled away harshly.

“I have to go” I said and started walking away. This time, Finn wasn't following me. I was somehow glad but at the same time disappointed. That made me believe for sure I was crazy. I can't feel disappointed after what he did, how he made me feel. It felt like someone was ripping my heart out of my chest and throwing it to the ground, squashing it with someone's shoe over and over again. It hurt that bad. . .

“This isn't the end Gwen! You hear me?” I heard him shout, though I didn't turn around, I just kept walking. “I won't give up on us! I'll fight for you even if it's the last thing I do; I promise”

All I wanted to do is to forget that this ever happen, I am so mentally exhausted right now with so much crying and screaming. My energy drained the moment I started talking to Finn back there. Even though I wanted to, I didn't turn around, I didn't want to see him in that state anymore. I just wanted to go back home and lie in bed, hide under my covers like when I was a little kid.

Chapter 50 - Is Time to Show that you Care

When I got home, the sun was setting down, leaving trades of pink and red in the sky, if I wasn't feeling like someone was stabbing me, then I would've stop to appreciate the beauty above me. But, with these recent events, all I wanted to do, is go to lock myself in my room, not needing to see the outside world any longer.

 

I finally got inside, just to see my parents and Alec sitting in the couch, in complete silence. My mom came rushing towards me, hugging me tightly. Alec was next, and he placed a kiss on top of my head. “We were so worried for you, sweetie. Alec told us you were crying and–and—”

 

“It's okay, mom, I'm fine. . .” was I? Of course I had to lie in order for her to be calm. I don't want to worry them anymore. It always seems like they have to constantly be asking me if I was okay, or that they were worried for me, and what not. They always need to take care of me, and I hate that. . .I hate that I've become someone that needs to be protected, I don't need that, I truly don't.

 

But ever since I found out about this baby, everyone had stared at me with pity, sympathy, even disappointment. That's the thing about having sex and ending like this, you have the proof that you made your own mistake, you're paying the cruel consequence by showing your disgrace and stupidity to the world. I hugged my dad quickly, and peck Alec's cheek before rushing to my room. I closed the door, letting a heavy sigh.

 

I walked towards my long-length mirror, staring at my reflection. The thing is, I couldn't almost recognize the figure staring back at me. That was not the image I wanted to reflect. I didn't want to cry, specially not because of Finn What he did was terrible, awful, horrible, everything you could possibly imagine, but I should've been strong. I should've looked him in those dazzling eyes and tell him to get the fuck out of my face. To get lost. To leave me the fuck alone. To never speak to me again. But the tears kept rolling down, my voice cracked, and the sobbing was uncontrollable. He played me bad, and while he was out there, probably happy that he got rid of me, I'm here bawling my eyes out.

 

He doesn't care about me; those tweets prove it.

 

He never saw a future with me. Though I went straight to the bait. I bet the only reason why he was sticking around, was because he felt somewhat sorry for me, for being also responsible for the fact that I'm pregnant. I can't believe he was crying too. If he did care about me, he would've been honest towards his fans, towards me.

Having these thoughts, made me want to punch the wall hard enough to break my knuckles. With the pain I'm feeling right now, I feel completely numb towards any type of thing.

 

My heart is already broken.

 

My relationship with him is already done.

 

The perfect life I've always planned since I was a little girl, is already shattered.

 

I walked towards my bed and lied there, staring at the ceiling, I kept thinking of those moments I shared with Finn—the father of this baby, the boy that made me fall for him in a matter of months, even though I claimed multiple times that I hated him to the core. He had a way of crawling into my heart, making me feel special. He made me smile every occasion, making my problems go away.

 

Was he lying when he was kissing me? Or when he was hugging me tightly? Was he lying those times we were together, my head on his shoulder, and he would whisper how much I mean to him? Thinking how he lied made my chest sting with pain all over again. Though, I tried my best to push those thoughts to the back of my head. I closed my eyes tightly, telling myself that I won't open them, and tried to fall asleep. I needed to rest after these past events. I needed the sufficient amount of energy that I lost arguing with the only boy that was capable of ripping my heart out, and tore it in like a billion pieces, all in one single day.

 

Finn's P.O.V

 

I'm not giving up. . .I promised myself I wouldn't do such thing. Most importantly, I promised her I wouldn't. I've never been so sure about something in my entire life. Regret is the worst feeling ever, and I've never felt such emotion until now. The guys were right, hell they were. . .But, I couldn't bare the sight of my poor and sweet Gwen going through such heartbreak, through such pain. I wiped the few tears that escaped my eyes without warning.

 

Currently, I was sitting in one corner of my dark and lonely apartment. No one was home, and it was so quiet you could hear the ticking of the clock in the wall.

 

Tik.

 

Tok.

 

Tik.

 

Tok.

 

Tik.

 

Tok.

 

I don't know how long I've been in that position, curled up in a corner, meditating about all of my choices in how to get her back, in how to make her forgive me. But, it will be tough, what I did is pretty much unforgivable.

 

I squeezed my eyes shut, and tried to focus. Nothing. My mind drifted back to that moment in the park. We were both heavily crying, she stared at me with such disgust, I had to look away from her piercing gaze.

 

Damn, I am an idiot.

 

A very stupid pathetic idiot.

 

I retrieved my phone from my pocket and dialed Cameron's number. I pressed it against my ear, and waited impatiently for him to pick up. I silently sobbed while I waited. It seemed like forever until he picked it up.

 

“C-Cam?” my voice cracked. I knew that I must've been sounding like a crying baby, but you know what? I don't care. I don't care because I was hurting too. The constant reminder that this was all my fault, kept replaying in my head.

 

“Finn? Dude, are you okay?” I could picture him frowning right now. I scratched the back of my head, sighing, before deciding to speak up. Though my voice sounded more like a whisper, more broken than I intended it to.

 

“No. I'm not. . .I-I, I just—” I couldn't form a coherent sentence. I closed my eyes once again, the stinging in my chest doesn't fucking stop and it's killing me.

 

“Finn, what happened, what is going on?” he asked.

 

“She k-knows C-Cam. We are done. She-she left me, she d-did. And-and—” I couldn't finish that sentence, my mouth wouldn't allow it. I gulped the lump in my throat and rested my head on my knees, sniffling.

 

“Dude, where are you?” concern clear on his voice. I wiped my eyes, and took a long breath, trying to control myself in order to be able to speak.

 

“I'm-I'm-I'm at t-the-the a-apartment” I managed to say.

 

“Alright, I'm on my way, okay? Hang on, I'll be there as fast as I can” he said and hung up. I tossed my phone to the side and placed my head in between my knees. God, how bad I wanted for everything to rewind. If I could only go back in time and change things. I wish more than anything that I could hug her, and kiss her, to hear her laugh once more. I messed up big time. I can't stop picturing her expression when we were at the park. The way the tears were streaming down her beautiful face, it was killing me.

 

I wanted to move, but I couldn't. I was there with my misery, in the dusty floor of this apartment. Without her here, it seemed like this place was missing some color, some happiness. I punched the wall out of frustration, multiple times. I groaned while continuing my assault. It wasn't making me feel any better, even though I wished that more than anything. I wanted to destroy everything with just the simple purpose of feeling better, of making the pain go away. But it wasn't fucking working.

 

Dammit.

 

Suddenly, I heard the front door being opened abruptly, making me jump. Cam's voice filled the air. “Finn! Finn where are you?” I heard him ask frantically. I wanted to speak but I couldn't. The constant crying drained me completely. I didn't felt like moving, to let him know I was there. I didn't saw the point in it.

 

“Finn, dude, what happened?” Cam asked while noticing my presence in the dark corner. I didn't look up at him. I kept staring at the floor, hugging my knees tightly at the sound of his voice. God, I wanted the ground to swallow me up.

 

When I didn't answer, he walked towards where I was sitting and kneeled in front of me to be on my level. He placed his hand on my knee. “Finn, tell me what happened” he said. I slowly looked up at him, and gasped when he saw my face, I know I was looking like crap. But I don't care, I don't care of how I look after what I've done to Gwen.

 

“Finn?” he called out for me again, shaking me slightly.

 

“She knows Cam” I said almost inaudible. He furrowed his eyebrows in confusion as he sat down next to me.

 

“What?” he asked. I let go a heavy sigh and finally locked gazes with my best friend.

 

“Gwen found out about the tweets, about the videos, about my lies, everything. . .” I said, letting another tear roll down my cheek, I didn't even care enough to wipe it away.

 

“Finn, I'm so sor—”

 

“Sorry?” I finished for him. “You don’t have to be sorry about anything. You were right from the very beginning. I should've told her. I waited too long and now blew it. You can now tell me I told you so” I said.

 

“Dude, I am truly sorry that this happened. I do know the reason why you didn't tell her”

 

“But it wasn't right. I know she would've at least forgive me if I was the one telling her what happened, explain her the situation. And now, she hates me”

 

“Did you talk to her?” he asked. I leaned my head back against the wall, laughing bitterly.

 

“Yeah, at the park. If you would've seen the look she gave me, the disgusted and pained expression she gave me when I tried to apologize. You can't imagine how awful it was to see her like that” I said, knitting my eyebrows together. It's so hard to keep picturing without wanting to cry all over again.

 

Cameron patted my knee, smiling sadly at me. “Why are you smiling?” I asked glancing at him briefly before staring back at the ceiling.

 

“Because I pity you. But not because you fucked up and now you're here miserable in the darkness. But because you're right here, sharing your misfortune with me instead of running to your girl and keep apologizing, showing her that you do care”

 

“How can I when she doesn't want to see me?”

 

“Insist. You said you regret what you did, that you like her a lot, right?”

 

“Dude, not only do I like her. But, I also think I'm in love with her” I admitted.

 

“Then go tell her that. . .Show her what she means to you, or it will be too late” he said now standing up, and held his hand for me to take it. I stared at it for a moment before grabbing it. He helped me get up and looked at me for a moment. “You love her, I know that, I've been knowing that ever since the first time she came to this apartment. You adore her, and want to protect her. I know that, Finn, but perhaps she doesn't. You know what you have to do. The fear is eating you alive, and you're letting it control you. Yeah, you fucked up, but you will never know if she is capable of forgiving you if you stay here and do nothing. You just need to try”

 

“She hates me” I stated the obvious. How can she not after what I've put her through?

 

“Maybe she hates you right now, but that's because she thinks you don't care for her one bit, which is completely false. I know you love her, now it's time for you to show her that that is true”

 

We stayed a few minutes in silence until I spoke up. “Thank you” I said, which made him smile.

 

“You're my best friend, Finn. And even though you did things wrong, I told you I would stick up for you through good and bad times” he said. I hugged him tightly, he patted my back soothingly, shushing me. I am so lucky to have him in my life, and honestly, I don't know what I would do without him. He's like my older brother and always knows what to say to me.

 

I promised I wouldn't give up for her. And that's exactly what I will do: I'll fight for that sweet girl that stole my heart.

 

I pulled away from him, and finally, a smile crept to my lips. “Even if she rejects me at first, I know she loves me too. I know that. . .”

 

He nodded, “Of course she does. Now, go and try to talk to her” he said. I grabbed my car keys from the counter and bolted towards the front door. But before leaving, I turned to Cameron, who was staring back at me.

 

“Thank you for always being there for me, Cam, I don't know what I would do without you” I said.

 

“Now, you will make me cry” he said which made me laugh. “Go and get your girl” he said. I nodded, and got out the door, slamming it shut once I was outside. She might kick me out, of course, but that doesn't mean I won't be persistent with her. The talk I had with Cameron made me realize how much I love her; how much I want her with me again. And crying won't do any good anymore, it will just make things worse.

 

I don't want this to end like that. I won't allow it. I won't allow the only girl in this entire world that made me feel happy slip away without putting a fight.

Chapter 51 - I Won't Give Up

Gwen's P.O.V

 

I lost count of how long I've been lying in my bed, with tear stained cheeks and a dry throat. I couldn't bring myself to sleep, my attempts in doing that were in vain. I stayed wide awake, still exhausted. I didn't want to talk to anyone, not even to Alec. I don't want him to find out about this, he will go look for Nash and most likely kill him.

 

I started caressing my stomach delicately. “It's not your fault” I mumbled. “It is mine, for allowing this to happen” I felt bad for this innocent child, even though he/she is not born yet. It was a mistake to talk to Finn at that bar, to let him seduce me, for always going back to him whenever I needed comfort. When he was holding me in his warm arms, I felt somehow safe, he made me feel in a way no human being has ever before. God, I want to stop thinking about him, but I can't.

 

I heard a light knock on my door, which made me look up. There stood Alec, leaning on my doorframe, arms folded. I turned the other way, not wanting to look at him, I didn't want to speak to anyone. I thought I made that clear when I left to the park.

 

“Gwen?” he called out for me. I didn't answer, my voice was too weak to mutter anything. I heard his footsteps approaching me, which made me hug my pillow even tighter. He sat down next to me, and rubbed my back soothingly.

 

“Are you okay?”

 

No. Of course I am not okay.

 

But I couldn't tell him that. So I went with a simple: “Yes”

 

“Then why aren't you looking at me?” he asked, concern clear on his voice. I glanced at my brother, and forced a smile into my lips. At least I stopped crying, but that doesn't mean my face will look good enough for him to believe me.

 

“I am okay, Alec, just a little tired, that's all” I said. He stared at me for a moment and caressed my cheek tenderly.

 

“You weren't okay this afternoon when you left for a walk” he said, frowning. I let go a heavy sigh, I know he's worried, but I would like to be alone.

 

“I. Am. Okay. I promise” I said each word deliberately slow. But his face showed me he didn't bought that. Of course he knows something is up, he's my older brother after all, and there's no one that knows me more than him.

 

“You know that you can tell me anything, right?” he asked, and I nodded slowly. There's no one I trust more than him, but this is something that I need to deal with alone. I need to deal with the painful heartbreak by myself, without my family on the way.

 

“Mom and dad are worried for you too” he commented. I stared at the ceiling before looking back at him.

 

“I know they are, though they don't have to be, there's nothing to be worried about, besides the fact that their little princess is pregnant” even though I've been through this for several months, I still can't help but cringe at the word ‘pregnant’.

 

He nodded, “If you need anything, don't hesitate in telling me. I would do anything for my little sister” he said and kissed the top of my head. I am glad he is in my life, I feel so blessed with him, he always knows how to make me feel happy.

 

“I know, thank you big bro, I love you so much” I said and hugged him. I felt like crying when I was burying my face on his shirt, inhaling his cologne and lavender scent, a smell I came to love so much, it felt somehow comforting.

 

He hugged me even tighter, caressing my hair. “I love you so much more, to the infinity and beyond” he said. When we pulled away, he held my face in between his warm hands, staring at me for a moment into my eyes.

 

“You are my little princess, and if anyone ever hurts you, I will do anything in my will to hunt down that person” he said before placing a kiss on my forehead.

 

“I know” I said, smiling for real this time. I know he can be able of doing that and much more. When he left, I let go a heavy sigh, and stared at my surroundings, the night was quiet, no one was on the road at this time of day.

 

I heard my phone buzzing in my nightstand, so I grabbed it and unlocked it.

 

Finn.

 

Finn was texting me? Wasn't I clear when I told him to never speak to me again?

 

Finn:

 

We need to talk.

 

Finn:

 

Baby, please, let me explain.

 

Finn:

 

I know you're reading this; you're just ignoring me. Please give me a chance to explain. Please baby.

 

I wanted to throw my phone out the window, I was so mad at myself at that moment, because him calling me ‘baby’ still made my stomach flutter and my heart pound fast. What is wrong with me?

 

Then the next text made me frown at my screen.

 

Finn:

 

Then I guess I'll have to wait outside your house until you decide to come out.

 

I quickly rushed towards my window, opening it completely, the night breeze hitting my face like a truck. I saw a figure down pacing back and forth, the street dimmed lights illuminating him. I knitted my eyebrows together. God, is he serious?

 

“What part of stay away from me don't you understand?” I asked. He looked up abruptly, startled at my voice.

“You know me by know, Gwen, I don't quit. Specially towards the things I care the most” he said, putting his hands inside his jean pockets.

 

“What do you want?” I asked, folding my arms. I tried not to scream too much so my family wouldn't hear.

 

“I want to explain”

 

“There's nothing to explain, Finn. You got what you wanted, what else do you want from me?” I asked.

 

“I want you to come down, and talk to me”

 

“I don't want to talk, because there's nothing you can say or do that will make me change my opinion about you. You blew it, get it in your head. You never cared about me, you always wanted your fifteen minutes of fame”

 

“We both know that is not true. You know, deep inside of you, that every moment we shared, everything we talked about, every kiss, hug, all of that was completely true” he said, sadness plastered on his voice. We stared at each other for quite a while, until I turned on my heels and walked outside my room, directing myself downstairs, trying my best not to wake up my parents or call Alec's attention.

 

I opened my front door and saw that jerk waiting. His gaze instantly fell on mine. His expression was blank when he saw me, almost surprised for being there with him. We didn't speak right away, he was just looking at me, like if he was studying me. I didn't want to hear him out, it will possibly make things worse.

 

“What do you want from me, Finn?” I asked, crossing my arms across my chest. “Do you have any idea how much you're hurting me by being here right now?” I asked, frowning. He nodded slowly, scratching the back of his head.

 

“I know, believe me, I do know how you feel, because I'm going through the same thing” he said.

I shook my head in disbelief. “Really? Do you really care? Cause it didn't seem like that when I read those tweets”

 

“I was stupid to put that, Gwen, but you need to fucking understand that I had to!” he said frustrated.

 

“Oh, you had to, because that's just the perfect excuse. So, you just had to lie to me about it? You had to lead me on and pretend everything was fine when in reality you were lying to your fans about us, about this baby that is yours too? I am pregnant because of you!” I said, getting angrier with every passing second.

 

“I know that! Do you think I don't fucking know that I am the father of this child? I am well aware of that!”

 

“This conversation is going excellent” I said sarcastically, rolling my eyes.

 

He rubbed his face with both of his hands before locking his gaze on mine. “I didn't mean any of this to happen, Gwen. In all honesty, I wanted to have sex with you, I admit that. I saw you in that bar all innocent and vulnerable, I wanted to prove to the guys that I could make you mine, that I could have any girl. But—”

 

“Oh really?— ”

 

“Don't interrupt, please” he said, making me shut up. He let go a heavy sigh and took a step towards me. I took one step back, but he grabbed both of my arms pulling me towards his hard chest. “But, then you became part of my life. You made me feel in a way that no girl has ever been capable of making me feel. . .You stole my heart, Gwen, you made me genuinely happy. You made me smile for real. With you, my laugh became stronger, more meaningful. I stopped looking for other girls to have fun with because I already found the one I've been dreaming and looking for my entire life. That girl is you, Gwen”

 

I stared into his majestic chocolate brown eyes, that can't seem to stop making my legs go weak.

 

“Why are you doing this?” I asked, his grip became tighter, not allowing me to move any further. “Why did you come here? You're just making everything worse”

 

“No, I'm trying to explain to you that those things you read, weren't true. I've never regretted something in my entire life, I never had anything to regret, until now. . .I am here in front of you, trying to apologize for my mistakes. . .Gwen, I lo—”

 

“Finn, sometimes, sorry doesn't cut it. I need space, space to think, to try to comprehend things. I need time away from you, away from the spotlight that you forced on me. Do you think I like to know that there are like a million girls out there that are hating me right now? That think I am some kind of slut, or prostitute. You know what they're saying right now? They said I was sleeping with Cameron and that Shawn Mendes guy for money. How do you think that makes me feel?”

 

“Baby, I know, I-I know you must feel like shit, but I promise I will fix things”

 

“Don't you think you've done enough already?” I asked.

 

“Yes, but–but, I promised you I wouldn't give up, I won't Gwen. Believe my words when I say that I won't let you go without at least put a fight. I won't let go the only person in this entire universe that was able of making me happy”

 

“Then prove it” I responded. "Prove I am worth it, because I won't give in so easily, not this time"

 

He brought his hand up, and started caressing my cheek tenderly, his touch was sending shivers down my spine. I wanted to pull away but it felt so good. God, why does he needs to have that effect on me?

 

“I will do anything on my will to let you know that you are the most precious thing on my life” he whispered. Leaning down, he placed a soft kiss on my forehead. When he let me go, he took a step back, and eyed me for a moment. “This isn't over, Gwen. I can assure you that” he smiled at me, showing his perfect set of teeth. With one last look, he started walking away, but I was too shocked to move, to speak up. I saw him driving away, and that's when I snapped out of my thoughts.

 

I sighed, and slowly started walking inside my house. I closed the door, and leaned my back against it. Today has been so stressful, so tiring, and emotional. It's so hard to keep up with my own feelings.

 

I walked to my room, and saw the screen of my phone light up. I furrowed my eyebrows in confusion and unlocked it, just to be greeted by another text from Finn.

 

Finn:

 

Sleep tight, Gwen, just know I will keep thinking of you. Sweet dreams, baby.

Chapter 52 - If Things Could Be Different

The next morning, I had a pain in the neck, probably from sleeping in a bad position the night before. I vaguely got out of bed and rubbed at my sore neck in my way to the bathroom. When I turned on the light switch, my reflection in the mirror caught me off guard. I had forgotten how bad I looked. My skin was pale, my eyes were kind of puffy due to so much crying, my hair was a tangled mess. There was smudged mascara under my eyes, making me look like if someone had punched me and had left me black eyes. I cringed at my own reflection, it was too horrible. I grabbed the make-up remover and started wiping out my entire face.

 

I decided to take a quick shower, perhaps it could make me feel a little better. When I was done, I dried myself and then wrapped myself with the towel, walking directly to my room again. I went inside the closet and put on a loose over-size white shirt that Dani got for me last week, and gray sweatpants. I put my wet hair in a high ponytail, no make-up this time.

 

I walked downstairs and was greeted by my brother sitting on the counter, a coffee mug in his hands. He smiled at me, and placed the mug down. “Morning” he said.

 

“Morning” I replied, my voice hoarse.

 

“I've never seen you sleep this late on a Sunday” he said.

 

“Wait! Today's Sunday!?” that helped as a cold water bucket to wake me up for real this time.

 

“Yeah, so?” he asked, furrowing his eyebrows in confusion.

 

“So? I have school tomorrow! And–and I didn't finish my History paper, due tomorrow! Dammit”

 

“Now that's the Gwen I know and love” he said, taking a sip from his coffee.

 

“Ah!” I screamed and bolted up the stairs, earning a chuckle from Alec. I closed my door and grabbed my laptop, opening Word. I've been working on that 20-page essay the entire morning, with my book and notebook beside me. I had totally forgotten about it, and the fact that it's a Summative.

 

“Gwen, can I come in?” I heard Dani at the door.

 

“Hmm” I mumbled, I was too concentrated to get distracted now. I heard her soft foot-steps approaching me, but I didn't bother to look up. She placed a Starbucks coffee next to me on my desk.

 

“Alec told me on the phone that you were getting all crazy because of this History paper, so I thought some caffeine could give you a little boost”

 

I smiled gratefully at my best friend. “Once again, you win the award for the best friend of the year” I said which made her laugh.

 

“Oh wow, I already have like ten best friend awards in my shelf”

 

“Well, you earned them fairly, always surprising me with the way you understand and know what I need” I took a sip from my latte, feeling way much better than the time I woke up this morning. I was thankfully on my last page of the paper, so I stopped for a moment.

 

“My fingertips had never hurt this bad” I moaned, earning a chuckle from Dani, who sipped from her coffee.

 

“You forgetting about doing Homework is so unlike you” she said, and I nodded in agreement.

 

“I know, I know, but with everything that's been happening, I forget about what's important to me, school for starters”

 

“Yup, you're still goody-goody two shoes Gwen” she said, which made me nudge at her shoulder playfully.

 

“I need good grades if I want to go to a good College” I replied, now sitting on my bed, Indian style. She nodded and sat beside me. We stayed a few moments in silence before she spoke up.

 

“What happened yesterday?” I knew she was going to ask that. Though seriously I didn't want to talk about it, I believe Dani deserves to know. Not only is she my best friend, but she also was the one to actually show me what was going on.

 

I let go a heavy sigh, sipping on my hot coffee, “It's a long story”

 

“Lucky for you, I have absolutely nothing scheduled in my non-existent agenda” she said which made me laugh.

 

• • •

 

“Wow” was Dani's only response once I finished telling her exactly what happened, detail by detail. “And he texted you that too when he left?”

 

“Yup. Which made me more confused” I said truthfully. “Am I doing the right thing?”

 

“Gwen, of course you are. . .He lied to you, he made you believe that he actually cared, when in reality he was trying to look cool in front of his fans. You know how much they're talking about him right now because of this baby thing? In fact, it made him even more famous”

 

I let go a heavy sigh, not being able to stop thinking of Finn, that scene in the park of him on his knees, begging for my forgiveness. It was so hard to watch him like that. He always seems like this strong boy, in front of his fans, in front of the camera. He smiles and laughs at his own weirdness. But, I can't let him fool me, he needs to understand that he can't buy me with his own tears and apologies. I already listened to everything he had to say. I can't bare to listen to anymore of his bullshit.

 

When I finally finished my History paper, I felt more relieved, like a weight was being lift off my shoulders. Dani giggled at my expression when I closed my laptop.

 

“Yup, you're still nerdy Gwen!” she teased now laughing, which made me join her. Perhaps I'm nerdy, an organized freak, innocent, or too naïve, but that's the way I am, and you know what? I pretty much love it. I enjoy following rules, my organized schedules, I freaking love finishing my homework one week before due date. Those types of things make me think I'm ahead of people, that's just who I am. . .I never cared for what others think of me. I am who I choose to be, not what others want me to be.

 

After talking for like half an hour, Dani had to leave, even though she kept telling me how she could stay with me longer, claiming that she shall never leave a best friend alone after such heartbreak. But, I told her I was fine, because I was, or that's what I wanted to believe. Yeah, there is still that painful stinging in the pit of my stomach, and the thought of Finn couldn't stop making my heart ache. But, I could at least pretend I was fine, I think that's the better option than keep bawling my eyes out for something that I should've known from the beginning.

 

I let go a heavy sigh, while scrolling down those awful comments. I know what you're all thinking, I know I shouldn't see what people are saying about me. But I truly need to be aware of what they're saying, of what they're commenting about. I actually smiled when I saw some decent girls defending me. I thought all of them hated me, but I guess there are some understanding fans out there after all. Though I felt relieved that I was getting some support, that didn't let me relax too much. I was still in the spotlight that Finn basically forced on me.

 

I lied down on my bed, staring at the ceiling, lost in thought. How much I wish things could've been different. How much I wish that I would've had taken different decisions.

 

But of course, wishing is not going to get me anywhere.

 

“Gwen is such a bitch!”

 

“Omg, ikr!? She slept with Finn just to get pregnant and have his money! She basically ruined everything for him”

“Waste of life”

 

“Ugh! Try hard. . .”

 

I let out an exasperated scream as I closed my computer harshly. I know that I shouldn't take my anger out in inanimate objects, but at this point, I just don't care anymore. I feel exhausted, betrayed, humiliated, everything at the same time. I just want to close my eyes and open them again, with everything back to normal. I would love to be able to forget that first night in that bar where I didn't fall in the trap of Finn Harries. I want to go back to when my life was easy, where I planned everything.

 

I covered my face with both of my hands and started crying. But not only for what those crazy fans are saying about me, but for being stupid. . .For being naïve and not putting a stop to Nash before it was too late. He crawled into my heart and I got too attached to him. Even if he doesn't feel the same about me, I can't stop loving him. I want to hate him, but a big part of me wants to run over to his place and hug him, kiss him, be in his warm and strong arms.

 

I grabbed the pillow and placed over my face, screaming at it, my voice muffled. "How could I've been so fucking stupid!?" I asked aloud. I want to stop crying so badly, but I can't. I freaking can't. . .

 

God, I want to fucking forget about him. . .

 

I want him out of my life, out of my heart. These last events that happened made me think of my options. About giving this baby for adoption. I wanted to talk things through with him, but apparently he doesn't care. He never cared of how I felt or for what I was going through. It seems like he cares just for one thing:

 

Fame.

 

Was my brother right? Is he like the rest and was just looking for sex?

 

I seriously didn't want to come to that conclusion.

 

Actually, I shouldn't hate him. . .I should hate myself. . .

 

I allowed this to happen, I let him into my life in the first place. It has been my fault all along, and just now do I realize that. Finn hurt me and played me like that because I trusted him too much. What was I expecting from a celebrity that huge? I wanted to laugh at the same time that my tears were rolling down my cheeks. Because in some way—in some sick and demented way—this is so funny. So fucking hilarious.

 

I have gone mad, I know.

 

But I prefer faking a laugh and pretending that this entire situation is funny, than keep on dwelling on my pain. I prefer stifling a giggle, than bawling my eyes out for that intensive looking boy. For that huge Pop Star that can't seem to stop popping in my head. I want to scream, cry, laugh, destroy everything around me, hug someone, all at the same time. . .Those thoughts were giving me a headache.

 

If I could just close my eyes and open them again, I would love to be in that same bar where my life changed completely, and walk away the second that that jerk sat next to me.

 

I wouldn't be pregnant and I wouldn't be with a broken heart. . .

 

If I could just rewind everything and forget him. . .

 

But I love him too much, I freaking love him too damn much and that makes me feel even worse. 

Chapter 53 - Gotta do it for Her

Finn's P.O.V

 

9 days. . .

 

9 days without Gwen.

 

9 days I have been a complete zombie on interviews, rehearsals, or meeting fans. I kept on walking around my apartment, not knowing what to do, where to go, I didn't have anything anymore. Without her laughter, smiles, kisses, warm hugs. Without her, I felt lost. I just couldn't think straight anymore. I wasn't even feeling good enough to make videos. But at this point, I didn't give a fuck.

 

I tried so hard to talk to my fans about stopping with their harassment towards Gwen. She doesn't deserve this. At all. 

 

I want to talk to her so badly. I want hold her in my arms and apologize for a million times more. I can't speak, sleep properly, I don't find strength to talk to anyone anymore. My only responses are mumbles.

 

I want to see her again, but I know she hates me to the guts. I didn't mean any of this to happen. I am a fucking idiot.

 

I hate myself.

 

I put her in this shit, and I didn't tell her the truth. I lied. I lied to her. . .Her trust for me is far gone.

 

I lied on my bed and stared at the ceiling, thinking about possibilities for her to forgive me. Of course, nothing came to mind. But, I can't give up. . .

 

I tried to give her space, for her to think, for her to be away from me. I was basically dead these days without hearing her voice for so long. Was it truly 9 days? Because it feels like it's been a year. Am I solemnly desperate at the moment? Yes, answering your question, yes I am desperate. . .I want her. I need her. I need her lips. Her hugs. I want to just talk to me. I am scared but at the same time so damn happy for all these rushing feelings. I want her with me right now and this ‘giving her time’ shit is getting on my nerves.

 

I stared at my phone, with the crazy idea that she will actually text me. That she will at least call me? I don't know. . .I wish more than anything for that to happen, but of course it doesn't. What the hell am I thinking? I held the golden necklace that she threw to the ground. I was terrified when she did that—because that truly meant she wanted things to be over and to never see me again. I am not that stupid. I didn't try to ‘butter her up’ like she assumed. I gave her this necklace to prove my love for her. 

 

Then an idea popped up. Not something that I'm sure will work, but is some basic approach. So I can't be near her, right? But I can at least give her something. I grabbed a pen and a small piece of paper, proceeding to write a note. I hurriedly grabbed my keys and bolted out the door.

 

I knew where I had to go and I was not giving up. I wasn't at least without a fight. I would do anything for that hazel-eyed girl that stole my heart.

Chapter 54 - Written Promises

Gwen’s P.O.V

 

9 days.

 

I haven't spoken to that moron for 9 freaking days and I'm still hurting. My heart aches for him—something I thought would have vanish away at this point. I rubbed at my growing bump, still not believing it's been this long since I figured out I was having a baby.

 

“It's almost time” I thought to myself. The day where I can finally see this baby for the first time. That day will be the one where I will have to give this baby away. I let go a heavy sigh and put a star and of hair behind my ear. This indeed for the best. Giving this baby to a more responsible adult, is the best decision. But, why do I feel like I'm committing the worst crime of all? Why do I feel so guilty? That horrible feeling is eating me alive. 

 

I shook my head, trying my best to put the thought of Finn in the back of my head. He's not worth my time anymore. He just proved to me that apparently what we had wasn't real, he was just acting for his fans to be happy. But, what about me? I don't want to keep whining for the fact that he will always choose someone else over me. How could I ever think that someone as famous as him, would be interested in someone like me? He has every single girl in the palm of his hands. With his perfect white set of teeth, his dazzling blue eyes, his warm and comforting smile. . .Ugh.

 

“Just stop it, Gwen” I thought in my head. I want to stop thinking about him. . .Why is it impossible? Why the hell did I allow that asshole to crawl so deep into my heart?

 

I grabbed my phone from my nightstand and re-read for the thousandth time that text he sent me before leaving my driveway. I wanted to smile at his words but had to stop and in my head scream at my heart for being so weak. My head needs to be focused in what truly matters, and a boy who hurt me this much isn't worth it. He is not worth it.

 

I heard a tap on my door, which made me turn around. Alec stood there with his wide smile. I eyed him for a moment before giving him a small smile myself. He hasn't brought up the fact that I've been acting like a complete zombie—which I'm totally thankful for. As hard as it is for me to admit it, I just have to. . .I am a complete disaster without that boy that stole my heart. Dammit.

 

“Hey, sis” he said and walked towards me. I left my phone back in the nightstand and crossed my arms across my chest.

 

“Hey, what's up?”

 

“Well, Dani is worried about you. Mom and dad are worried about you—they're basically starting to think you're depressed—and me, well, I am the one that is worried the most” he said with a frown. I let go a heavy sigh and sat down at the edge of my bed.

 

“If you're thinking I'm cutting myself, I'm not” I chuckled, trying to joke around, but his face didn't soften. “Look, Alec, with this pregnancy thing, I just don't feel like doing much. In fact, I just want to get this over with”

 

“I get that you're going through such tough time, but please. . .You can't behave like this. Is not good for you. And I know, I fucking know it has nothing to do with the pregnancy. Last time I checked, you were happy because I sort of ‘accepted’ your relationship with that ass—I mean, Finn. Now, you're here almost every day without a coherent response, and just walking around with nowhere to go" he said and sat down next to me. “Did Finn. . .Do something to you?”

 

I didn't want any trouble, so I just shook my head, “No, this has nothing to do with him”

 

“Why do I feel like you're lying to me?”

 

Because I am indeed lying to you.

I don't know why am I protecting him, I just don't Alec to get mad and go looking for Finn, ready to kick his ass.

 

“I'm not” I said, grabbing his hand. “Everything is fine. . .”

 

“Alright, I will trust you. I just don't like seeing you like this” he replied and caressed the top of my hand with his thumb. “I came here to try to cheer you up. How about if we go see a movie?” he offered with hope in his eyes. A movie sounded great, but going out will just make feel sadder. I have to decline.

 

“I just don't feel like—”

 

“Ah-ah-ah don't even think about declining my offer. I am sick and tired of seeing you with the face of someone-ran-over-my-puppy. We are going out even if I have to drag you myself” he grinned. I couldn't help the smile that crept to my face. But not any type of smile—it was the real kind.

 

“Fine” I agreed. “But you're paying”

 

“Deal” he said and stood up. I grabbed my purse and put inside my phone and my wallet, just in case of course. We walked downstairs and Alec opened the front door for me. But before going out all the way, something caught my attention, something that was plastered in our front door. I exchanged some looks with Alec, who was just as confused as I was. It was a piece of paper with a red rose attached to it.

 

“Why don't you go to the car? I'll be there in a sec” I said. He was a moment without doing any type of action, just curious as to what was that piece of paper. After a moment, he finally turned on his heels and left. I gulped the lump in my throat and approached the note. I grabbed the rose and smelled it, smiling at how sweet it smells.

 

I slowly unfolded the piece of paper and read it.  

 

Gwen,

 

You have no idea how sorry I am. I am a fuck up, and I don't expect you to actually keep this, let alone read it. But if by any chance you do, just know that I will not stop fighting. For you, I would do anything. I didn't lie to you when I said that you were mine.

XX Finn.

And that my friends. . .Is how you mess up with someone's head.

Chapter 55 - Bonding

I stayed there for a moment, completely frozen on my spot. I didn't know what to do. I didn't know whether I should crumble the note and burn it, or keep it and cherish it. I stared at the rise once more and exhaled its smell.

 

My brother pressing on the horn made me et out of my trance. I turned around and signal him with my index finger to give a minute. I went back inside and rushed to my room. I placed the little note and the rose neatly on my bed. I will decide what to do with it when I get home.

 

How is it possible that he always finds another way to make my heart melt? I want to say I hate him, but the words don't come out. My stupid heart doesn't allow me to.

 

I went back outside and into the passenger's seat, receiving a puzzled look from Alec, who's tapping his long fingers in the dashboard, looking at me expectantly.

 

“So?” he finally spoke. His words urgent. “What was that about?”

 

I remembered that he doesn't need to know that Finn and I aren't on speaking terms. “Umm, it was Finn's. He can–he can be very romantic” I forced a smiled, to reassure him that it wasn't anything important.

 

Although it was. His words touched me in a way that I can't help but feel even more stupid for actually feeling happy.

 

Seriously, what the hell is wrong with me?

I think he bought it, since he didn't keep pushing on the subject, and finally turned on the engine.

The rest of the trip to the movie theater was spend in complete silence.

 

• • •

 

“The movie was awesome!” my brother said, grinning like a happy child. I smiled at him, I love it when he gets excited. His dimples show when he does that ear-to-ear smile and his voice gets all adorably high pitch.

“I know right? The best part was when they were fighting while the plane was nearly crashing down. The slow motion that they did before pulling the trigger was amazing!” I commented. For literally just an hour and a half, my mind was occupied, I felt at ease. I seriously didn't want the movie to end.

 

After talking and walking for a little bit, we decided to eat at McDonald's in the food court. While Alec ordered for us, I went to look for a table. As I was waiting, I went to my camera roll and checked at pictures I took with Finn.

 

I know, bad idea. . .But I can't help it. I was thinking in whether or not to delete them. I clicked on one picture. It was just him and I, hugging. I smiled at the memory. It feels like a decade ago, but it was just a couple months ago. I doubtfully clicked on the trash can bin, where the option of deleting the picture permanently popped up. I bit my lower lip, trying to decide. But just when I made up my mind and was about to delete it, Alec arrived with our food.

 

I think I am going crazy. Because I actually felt relieved when he showed up. . .

 

“Quarter Pounder for the Princess” he said, making a bow jokingly as he placed the burger in front of me. I couldn't help the giggle that's escaped my lips.

 

We kept talking about the movie, he couldn't stop smiling at me every time we would stay quiet.

“Why are you smiling?” I asked.

 

“Because” he started, eating one of his fries, “I missed this. . .Us, hanging out together, you laughing, the simple fact that we're not fighting anymore. I hate fighting with you. You're my princess, Gwen” he said. I grabbed his hand and caressed the top of it with my thumb.

 

“I love you, Alec” I said. He put his free hand over my hand that his holding his other hand.

 

“I love you too, Gwen” he said.

 

I am so lucky to have him in my life. Every time we would argue that would tear me apart and it was driving me insane. He's my big brother for God's sake. Without him I would be lost right now. Only he knows how to make me smile and forget about my problems.

 

“Thank you” I said and found myself sighing in relief. He knitted his eyebrows together in confusion.

 

“For what?” he asked.

 

“For making me forget about my worries. . .I've been so stressed lately, so thank you for helping me clear my head”

 

“Of course. I know that this pregnancy thing has been very tough for you lately, especially now that is almost time. Also considering the fact that I've been an ass through all these months” he replied, looking down at the palm of his hands. He bit his bottom lip and held a face with regret. I grabbed his hand tightly, which made him look at me in the eyes.

 

“You were just worried about me. . .And, even though you got suffocating at times, that just shows how much you love me”

 

That made him smile widely. I felt happy that I hung out with him. Ever since my argument with Finn, I finally felt relaxed, without much dreadful thoughts. It was just him and I. Brother and sister.

 

“Thank you too”

 

“Why?” I asked, furrowing my eyebrows in confusion.

 

“For being in my life”

Chapter 56 - I Love/Hate Him

When we finished eating, we went directly home, not one of us speaking a word. We didn't have to, honestly. The silence was nice. It wasn't awkward or uncomfortable; it was very nice.

 

When he parked the car and killed the engine, he locked gazes with me. “Thanks again, for you know. . .”

 

He smiles, “I know”

 

We didn't have to say anything else. We have that way of understanding each other with one simple look. We got out of the car and into the house, where we saw our parents drinking coffee. 

 

“Hey” my mom smiled at us. I waved at her and walked towards the stairs. I heard my father asking if I was okay, but Alec didn't answer. I went to my room and walked towards my bed, where the rose and note where still there.

 

I furrowed my eyebrows as I re-read the piece of paper over and over again. I am so pissed at him. I mean, how dare he do these things? Does he have the stupid idea that his cute gestures will make me forget what he did?

 

Him doing these things just confuses me even more. I want to hate him. I want him to vanish away—to forget that I exist. But at the same time I want him here, close to me, hugging me, telling me that he never wants to leave me. I want him to be mine. . .But if he is going to care about his fame, then no thank you. If he's always going to put a bunch of strangers before me, then he can go to hell. That's what I hate the most about this entire situation. . .I hate him so much because I can't help but loving him despite the fact that he lied to me throughout all these months.

 

Does that even make sense?

 

I don't think so. But I can't help it.

 

My heart is in constant war about what I should do. My mind and energy are drained. I am exhausted and sick of crying, of fighting.

 

This baby caused it.

 

But it's not his/her fault. I've said that from the very beginning.

 

How can an innocent child, be responsible for the mistake done by two irresponsible teenagers? 

 

I would never blame anyone other than myself. I can blame Finn for like a billion things, but I should take part of the fault too.

 

I talked to him that night at the bar.

 

I went to his Hotel room.

 

I kissed him first.

 

I allowed him to take it too damn far. . .

 

I am the stupid girl who got her heart broken.

 

A tear rolled down my cheek as I thought of it—as I thought about Finn and how I shouldn't be this miserable about something that I should've known. It was too obvious. But, I was too damn innocent to notice. I wiped the tear away angrily—I was furious at myself for crying. Why the hell am I crying? I shouldn't be crying. . .I won't allow that. It is stupid to cry now.

 

I've cried so damn munch ever since I found out about this baby.

 

I've cried for so many reasons and I am sick already. I am sick of showing my weakness to the world. I am sick of being the frightened girl who's about to have a baby. I am sick of always getting hurt.

 

This is just too much for me.

 

I stared at the rose. . .

 

You know what I am most angry about?

 

That I hate Finn so much for his lies and his cruelty, yet I can't get rid of this rose. I can't burn his note. I can't walk away from it either.

 

I had so much fun with Alec this afternoon, that I just step one foot in this house, and start crying all over again.

 

“I don't want to cry anymore” I said aloud. I lied on my bed and grabbed the note, pressing it to my chest. “I want to hate you, but I love you, you fucking moron. I fucking love you”­

Chapter 57 - I Want You to be Happy

I've been dreaming with Prom since I was just 13 years old. Dani and I would lie in our backs on the ground, planning the perfect night. It feels so weird that Prom is actually a week away. It feels weird that this baby is not that far away from seeing the light. It feels so weird that I don't have a date anymore for the big night.

 

I was about to call Dani to let her know that I will skip Prom and just watch Netflix all night. But I could just imagine her head exploding with the simple thought of not assisting to basically one of the best nights in the life of a teenager—I literally imagine her head exploding, dear God, I was scared now.

 

But she would understand, right?

 

No, of course she wouldn't. . .

 

She would flip out. Is not only a reality, is a fact.

 

But the bare thought of going after everything that happened, makes me dread it even more. I don't want to be reminded by the constant fact that Finn isn't coming with me. Or to see the people that laughed at me about this baby. I don't want to see anybody. Just my bed, my pillow, and my laptop.

 

I heard my phone buzzing. I grabbed it and slide my thumb across the screen to answer who was calling. Which talking of which, it was Dani.

 

“Hey!” she said excitedly. If only I could feel that way.

 

“Hi”

 

“Oh-oh, I know that hi, you're sad” she concluded.

 

“How is it possible that you believe that I am sad after listening to me say hi?” I asked.

 

“A best friend knows how her best friend feels like with just listening to her words or facial expressions”

 

“I am fine”

 

No, I'm not. These second thoughts about Prom are eating me alive.

 

“G. You don't sound too good. Are you sure you're okay?” her voice changed in a drastic way, from playful to concerned. I paused for a moment and bite my lower lip.

 

“I just don't feel like I can assist Prom” I said. She stayed in complete silence for what seemed like forever. I could picture her frowning and debating in her mind whether I am joking or not.

 

“What?” she asked in a low voice. “What did you say?”

 

Here it comes.

 

“After everything that has happened, I just can't bare the fact that everyone will just judge me. Worse, I don't have a date. I just don't want to have the constant reminder that you know who, betrayed me and used to be my date”

 

She let go a heavy sigh, “Gwen, I understand. . .Believe me that I do. But we've talked about this. Are you seriously going to let a sucker-for-fame and talentless little Pop star ruin what is supposed to be the best night of your life?”

 

“I know, is just. . .I don't want to face anybody right now”

 

“Gwen”

 

“Dani” I mimicked her voice.

 

“You know that I only want the best for you” she said.

 

“I know you do. Which is one of the reasons that makes you a great best friend. But, this is already hard for me”

“Gwen, I know. But I can't let you miss the best night of your life for a guy that could go to hell”

 

I smiled, “I want to go”

 

“Then go”

 

“Is hard”

 

“You make it hard” she said, sighing. “You're overthinking things too damn much, like you always do, instead of not caring what others think or say about you”

 

“How can I not feel self-conscious about what others say if they're always looking at me—judging my every move”

 

“You're forgetting something. . .”

 

“What?” I asked, furrowing my eyebrows in confusion.

 

“I'll be there with you. Ready to attack any bitch that gets in your way”

 

“I am so lucky to have you”

 

“Me too” she said.

 

“Fine” I sighed and sat at the edge of my bed.

 

“Fine what?”

 

“I'll go. . .You're so damn good in convincing people. Dammit” she does have a point. I can't let Finn ruin anything anymore. I have to move on and forget him. . .It is the right thing to do after all. Now, I have to repeat that a million times and maybe my heart will start believing that as well/ Why does it has to be so damn hard? Why can't I just get inside my own head and rip out the thought of Finn? I want him out. . .

 

“Oh my, God, that's awesome! Even though I would've been capable of going inside your house and drag you to prom”

 

I giggled, “I believe you would have. . .” 

 

• • •

 

“The baby looks so healthy, there's nothing to be worried about. . .” Doctor McNamara said, with a reassuring smile. I sighed in relief, as my mom held one of my hands and Erin held the other. They both exchanged looks and smiled as well. Doctor McNamara excused herself and got out of the room, leaving us alone. 

“Well those are good news” 

 

"Excellent news, sweetie" my mom agreed. 

 

“Gwen, dear, you have no idea how happy you're making my husband and I. Giving up a baby is such a serious decision” Erin said, sitting down on of the chairs. 

 

“I know, but—”

 

“Which is why we want to make sure you're 100% sure you still want keep going with this. . .” she cut me off. I furrowed my eyebrows in confusion. Her words made me think for a few minutes, the silence grew upon us. 

“Excuse me?” I asked, trying to understand her words. 

 

Of course I want to keep going with this. . .It is indeed the right thing to do. 

 

“You see? We've been through this many times. All of the times we've been expecting to receive the baby, the girl would step back and saying she can't give her baby, that it is too hard. And we would understand, with the hope that there will be another woman that is willing to let go. . .”

 

“But—” she raised her hand up, cutting off my sentence once more. I stayed quiet, letting her proceed. Where is she going with all this? 

 

“Which is why, when this baby is born, we want you to spend some time with him/her” 

 

“What!?” my mom and I said at the same time. 

 

“I know it's weird, and maybe stupid. . .But we want you to be sure that you want to give it to us”

 

“But I am sure, is the right thing to do. . .”

 

“It may be the right thing to do, but maybe is not the thing you want to do, and what about the father? Is he okay with this?”

 

He doesn't even know that I am giving it to someone else. 

 

“Well, I-I, actually—”

 

“Exactly” she said, with a half-smile. 

 

“But, Erin—”

 

“I want you to be happy Gwen. You have been so nice with Henry and I. . .We want you to be happy”

 

“But you guys deserve this baby more than anything in the world” I said, caressing my stomach. She nodded and stood up. She walked towards me and grabbed my hand, caressing with her thumb the top of it. 

 

“Yeah, there's nothing we want more. But we also know what it's like to have something so precious, and then out of nowhere being snatched out of your very own hands. We went through something like that. When I was just 15, I got pregnant. My mother forced me to give my baby for adoption. I tried to deny, I tried to convince her that I will give my child the best life possible. But she didn't listen. The day I gave birth, my baby was already being cleaned up and handed to her new parents”

 

“But what happened when you got married, you didn't try to have another one?” I asked. 

She nodded, “Of course. . .Henry and I were adults and took our very own decisions. We were ready and financially stable. But-but—” her voice cracked. She stared at the ceiling and then back at me. Her crystal blue eyes were glass and I knew she was fighting back the tears. “But 9 months later when I was about to give birth. . .My precious baby died” she said, a single tear now rolling freely down her cheeks. My mom and I gasped in shocked. Her grip on my hand got tighter. Now, I was the one trying my best not to cry. 

 

“I am so sorry” I said. 

 

She forced a smile, “It was a long time ago. . .But Gwen, darling, I don't want this story to affect your decision. We know that you want us to have it. But I also know that deep inside you, you really don't want to give it away. . .You agree with this because is the right thing to do—you're 17 and want to live—but a mother would never give up her baby, no matter the age. One look at the baby's eyes—your baby's eyes—and giving it up will be the hardest thing to do” 

 

I was speechless. Motionless. Shocked. I didn't know how to reply with that. I was both terrified and anxious. Her answer left yet another hole inside me. Do I really want it? Do I want to give it away? I was already with the decision of giving it to another responsible family. Someone that could make him/her happy. Someone that can afford to give this baby a better and beautiful life. . .

 

What the hell can I do now? 

 

What the hell do I want to do? 

 

Just what the hell can I decide now? 

 

Chapter 58 — I won't Leave without a Fight

Finn's P.O.V

 

I was lying in bed, my eyes closed, my mind elsewhere. I've never felt this way for anything or anyone. What is happening to me? Why can't I control it? It is more than obvious that she doesn't want to see me ever again. But, the constant reminder that I promised that I wouldn't go anywhere is constantly in my mind.

 

The guys offered to take me to eat something, but I denied—like I have done ever since the day I spoke with Gwen at the park. I haven't eaten properly at all. I didn't feel like it anyway. What's the point of being anything close to happy when she is probably bawling her eyes out? Well, she is strong, no doubt on that. Maybe she is smiling, maybe she forgot me already. . .And the bare thought of that kills me. Dammit, I am so fucking cliché, but can you blame me? I am so hurt right now. I was an asshole, I know that, but I didn't want to take things so damn far. 

 

I keep thinking on what to do to get her back. . .

 

How is she doing with the baby? Does she need me? 

 

Even though we're not exactly on speaking terms, I have the right to know. . .I honestly just want to see her, I miss her smile. I miss her hugs. I miss just everything. I've never felt anything like this, it feels so surreal, but I have to admit that that girl has me head over heels. 

 

“You should be cast for the Walking Dead. You look like a zombie” I heard Cameron. I sat up straight and locked gazes with him. I groaned, which made him laugh. “Yup, just perfect for the role”

“I am not in the mood for jokes, Cam”

 

“Sorry, just trying to lighten the mood” he said. I let go a heavy sigh and got out of bed. I directed myself to our fridge and grabbed a fresh bottle of water, taking a sip. Cameron crossed his arms across his chest and furrowed his eyebrows as he checked my expression. 

 

“I know, Cam, and I appreciate that you're trying to help me. . .Although you shouldn't”

“Why not? You are my best friend” he smiled, walking towards me. 

 

“Yeah, but I am also an asshole” I said and took another sip. 

 

“I've known you for too long, I am used to you being an asshole” he said which made me punch his arm. 

“Harries, stop the violence!” he said, rubbing his arm. I chuckled and scratched the back of my head. “Maybe it's time for you to call her. . .” he said as he sat down on one of the black leather couches. I shook my head repeatedly and opened my eyes widely. Is he crazy or something?

 

“What? No. . .I can't. I know she's still pissed. I can't fucking blame her. I would be just as mad if she would've lied to me too. I don't think I gave her enough time yet so we can talk again. Plus, what the hell am I going to say to her anyway?”

 

“You can start by saying how much you love her, and what a fucking idiot you are” he said. “Besides, you are the one that promised not to let her go. . .Are you breaking your promise then?” he asked, making me go quiet for a moment. I sure as hell don't want to break that promise. I said I was going to fight for her, I do love her, and losing her is not an option. She is indeed the only girl that has been able to make me feel genuinely happy. As always, Cameron is right, and if I keep waiting, things will get worse. But if I try to do anything and come into the picture once more, she will remember why she wanted this break. Dammit, what the fuck do I do now? 

 

Cameron stood up from the couch and patted me on my shoulder, offering me one of his comforting and reassuring smiles. “I know you will do the right thing. You know what has to be done. And believe me when I tell you, that girl loves you, Finn, she truly does. . .But right now she feels like you don't and that you have given her up. If you love her and promised to fight for her, do what you feel is best. Do you want to be in her life, or do you want her to move on and forget you? Think about it, Finn” and with that, he walked out the door, leaving me in this desolated and dark room, alone with my own thoughts. 

 

I grabbed my phone from my nightstand and stared at Gwen's phone number. Should I call her? Did I give her enough time? Is she still mad? All these questions are roaming through my head and are making me more anxious. I want to hear her sweet voice once more. I want to hear her laugh. I want to hear her say my name. . .

I let go a heavy sigh and pressed the green call button, and it rang exactly three times until I hung up. I pressed my phone against my forehead and had a constant war in my head about if I should do it or not? I want to talk to her and fix things, but my nervousness and fear don't allow me to man up and call her. I am scared of her being hurt again. I am scared for her to scream at me and to tell me that she hates me. I am scared that I will push her even more over the edge to the point she will permanently block me out. 

 

I am so damn scared it hurts me.  

 

But you know what? I made a promise and I don't want to break it. For Gwen, I would do anything. She deserves so much more than what she has right now. It is my fault she is pregnant. It is my fault that she is receiving hate. And it is my fucking fault that she is heartbroken right now. 

 

Now that I remember it, she asked me to be her Prom date after this incident, even though now she doesn't want to see me. But fuck it, I will go. I will tell her how I feel and how fucking sorry I am. . .I won't leave without a fight. And she won't leave me until at least she hears out everything I have to say. 

Chapter 59 — Oh-oh, a Little Someone is on its Way

Gwen's P.O.V

 

The ticking of the clock hanging on the wall was driving me crazy. I closed my eyes and let go a heavy sigh. I opened them again and stared at myself in my long-length mirror. Tonight is the night. . .

 

Prom.

 

No Finn.

 

All eyes staring, judging my every move.

 

But at least I have Dani. She was right when she told me that I shouldn't care for what others think. There's always going to be hate, you just learn how to deal with it and ignore it.

 

Tik.

 

Tok.

 

Tik.

 

Tok.

 

Dammit. I can't throw that nerve-wracking clock out the window, it wouldn't solve my situation. 

 

I grabbed my dress, which I placed neatly on my bed. I heard the doorbell, signaling Dani was already here. I hurriedly went downstairs to open the door, and there she stood. With multiple bags and a grinning face.

 

“This is the best part of Prom, in all honesty” she said making me laugh. I nodded in agreement and we quickly went to my room. She helped me with the hair and make-up, which I sucked at. Why does hair need to be so important? When I suggested to just have it loose and maybe a braid to the side, Dani laughed in my face and patted my head like if I was a five year-old, stating that: “I have too much to learn”.

 

Once she was done, she turned me around so I can see myself. I smiled, although inside I was just too shocked to speak. She is indeed. . .A miracle worker.

 

“Told you that you would look way better with an up-do. And the pastel color on your lips makes your beautiful eyes pop” she said, hugging me from behind. When she was getting herself ready, I grabbed my dress and put it on. I stared at myself in the long-length mirror and for the first time after finding out about this baby, I felt secure. I truly felt like I could do anything and that nothing or no one would stop me. . .I touched my belly, Erin's words replayed in my head.

 

Giving it away is the right option, right? I am 17. Still in High School.

 

But why do I feel differently then? Why do I feel like if that isn't the best thing to do? Am I going crazy? What is happening to me? I put those thoughts to the very back of my head. Tonight is Prom, ‘the best night of my life’. they say. I'm supposed to enjoy it and have a good time with my friends. An unforgettable night. . .

 

“Gwen?” Dan is voice woke me up from my trance. I stared at her and smiled. She looked beautiful.

 

“Wow, you look amazing!” I said. She walked towards me and hugged me tightly.

 

“No, you do. . .Gwen, you look like a princess”

 

“Too bad I'm not having a happy ending this time. . .” I said, putting a loose strand of myhair behind my ear. She smiled sadly at me and gave me another reassuring hug.

 

“Your happy ending starts today. . .No one will take this moment away from you. No one”

 

“Thank you for sticking up for me till the end” I said, not wanting to cry. I won't cry. I won't allow it. Tonight's supposed to be happy and full of joy. My tears won't ruin that. She smiled widely and then continued with her make-up.

 

Finn's P.O.V

 

“Please, guys, you have to help me” I begged. They all exchanged looks, not quite convinced that I was indeed desperate. But what they didn't know is that I was determined to assist to Gwen's Prom, no matter what. I have to fix things. Maybe is not too late to do the right thing. And I have an idea. I obviously have no clue if it will work or not, but it is my last shot to get Gwen back and finally have her full forgiveness. “Guys, I have a plan, but I can't do it alone. . .”

 

“We don't want you to keep making mistakes” Jack said. The others nodded in agreement, all of them except Cameron.

 

“Dude, maybe it is time for you to let her go. . .She's gone through so much” said Shawn, patting my shoulder, but I shook my head repeatedly, not wanting to listen to those words.

 

“I won't let her go. . .I know I screwed up. but that doesn't mean that what we had wasn't real. I know I hurt her, but I have a plan that may or may not work. Either way, it is my only shot to get her back. I really need your help, guys. . .I can't on my own”

 

Cameron stood up, “I am with you” he said, which made me smile. The others stay a moment in silence.

 

“Ugh, fine, what is your plan you asshole” Shawn said with a smile. The others stood up from the couch.

 

“You're still a jerk, but you're also our friend. So count me in” said Jacob.

 

“With me too” Jack said as well.

 

“Thanks guys, this really means—”

 

“Dude, we really don't have time for your cheesiness if you plan on getting your girl back” Cameron said patting me on the back. I chuckled, nodding in agreement.

 

“Alright, alright. . .Here is what we will do”

 

Gwen's P.O.V

 

When Dani and I were ready and prepared to already leave for Prom, my mom and dad decided that it would be ‘lovely’ to bombard us with the Camera's flashes. My brother couldn't be Dani's date for Prom like she originally wanted since 1) He didn't want to encounter Miss Jacobs; they didn't have a good past when he was in my High School. and 2) He procrastinated too much so now he had to work on this massive project due in two days. Isn't he the brightest? But still, he didn't want Dani to go alone, so he allowed her to get a date. ‘Nothing romantic’, she said. And she better not getting her hands all over her date, I've been wanting her to date my brother for years. But he was still with us in the living room, admiring Dani's beauty. I smiled as he talked to her, his eyes lighting up when she replied. 

 

“Gwen, a picture!” my mom said. I smiled, and then Dani came along. “Oh my, God, you girls look beautiful!” my mom squealed. Dani and I laughed.

 

“Alright, guys, we gotta go” I said.

 

Dani grabbed my hand and we went out the door, but a car parked in front of our house caught my attention. The someone got out of the car. Well, not just anyone. . .

 

“Is that—” I trailed off, Dani let go a heavy sigh.

 

“Yup, that's him”

 

“Gwen” Finn said while walking towards me. I stayed motionless in place, not being able to utter a word. I forgot how handsome he looked. And why the hell is he wearing a tux?

 

“F-Finn” I stuttered, my voice weak. I felt how my legs were quivering like jell-o.

 

“You look. . .So beautiful” he said, but Dani got in front of me.

 

“Listen, Harries, cut the act, what the hell are you doing here? Don't you see that we're in a hurry?” Finn scratched the back of his head, but he never broke eye contact with me.

 

“I came to talk to Gwen. . .”

 

“We don't have time for—”

 

“Dani, is okay. I am done with running away” I said cutting her off. She had wide eyes and parted her mouth in two, totally shocked with my response. Finn's eyes lit up but he shouldn't be happy at all about this. . .But dammit, I haven't realized how much I missed him. I missed him so damn much. My hands are itching to caress his face. My lips are craving his. And I just want to have one of his tight and warm hugs.

 

“Don't feel too happy. I'm just tired of hiding. So if you want to say something. Just say it so we can get it over with” I said and crossed my arms across my chest. He sighed and gently grabbed both of my arms to move me one step to the right, so he can be without Dani on the way.

 

“I am sorry—”

 

I huffed, rolling my eyes. His apologies mean nothing at this point.

 

“Please, baby, don't interrupt” he said smiling. My heart flutter with just him calling me that. I haven't noticed how much I missed him calling me that either.

 

“I am sorry for making the mistakes that I did. I'm sorry for hurting you the way I did. I am so fucking sorry that right now you're thinking that I'm the most conceited son of a bitch to step a foot on this damn world. I was a jerk and a selfish asshole, and I know that you're hating me right now. But if you could just know how much I suffered these past weeks without you. . .I was lost. I was broken as well. . .In my mind I kept thinking how much I've hurt the one thing that has made me genuinely happy. I kept thinking the sad reality that you are strong enough to move on and forget me. That was my biggest fear, Gwen: That you would forget me”

 

My mind was puzzled; I didn't know what to think. . .I didn't know what to say nor do. I was standing there like a fool.

 

“I know that I messed up, but if you could just give me one last chance to prove to you that what we had mattered. I miss you so damn much, you took away my heart and I don't want it back. You made me smile, laugh, cry. Gwen, you made me fucking cry that day you walked away from me. . .”

 

“Finn. . .You're making things more complicated. . .” I said, finally finding my voice. He took a long breath, before grabbing my arms, caressing the top of them with his thumb.

 

“Please, Gwen. Let me prove to you that what we had was real. In fact, can I take you to Prom?”

 

“Finn—”

 

“Please, Gwen” his pleading eyes were killing me, but I had to look down at the ground to avoid his penetrating gaze. Those hypnotizing eyes still make me go weak. He brought my chin up for me to face him. His lips just mere inches from mine. “Gwen” he whispered, leaning closer.

 

“I can't do this right now. . .” I said, pulling away. His face fell, and I felt how my own heart was being ripped off my chest all over again. “Finn, I really have to go” I said and grabbed Dani's hand, dragging her to the car.

 

“Gwen!” Finn screamed after me. I turned around and stared at him one last time.

 

I love him. . .

 

I miss him. . .

 

I need him. . .

 

But is not right to keep hurting each other even more. I don't want to start a relationship with him if he will lie the moment things get complicated. I am looking for someone that is not going to walk away the moment things don't turn out the way they were planned. I want someone that wants to be with me without the fear of feeling embarrassed of people seeing us together.

 

I got into the passenger's seat and buckled in, not once looking back—if I dare to look back, I just know I will throw down the drain everything I just said and run to his arms, never letting go. I would forgive him and everything would be okay.

 

But I can't do that. . .

 

He needs to move on and forget me. Just like I'm trying to do. But, every time he appears, my mind goes elsewhere and my thoughts get all jumbled in my head. My heart starts beating and my hands start craving his touch. Every time he appears, it makes me crazy.

 

The first time I saw him, he got me under his spell. He said the right things and used his ‘magic’ for me to fall for him. Then I hated him and believed he was the biggest asshole. Then I loved him and never wanted him to leave me. My mind and heart are exhausted. I just don't know what to think or what to do. I want to rest and heal my already shattered heart. He lied to me, and at first it was hard to believe it, but in some way, he was protecting me. Yeah, in a twisted way, he kind of was—or this is just me already losing it—what hurt me the most is the way he talked about us. How it showed that I was nothing but a ‘fan’ and that this baby was someone else's. Saying those things, made me believe that it was clear that he was lying just to protect himself. And to top it all if, he was hiding it from me for months. He knew the shit storm was coming. He knew that his fans were not going to let it go. He didn't clear things up and basically gave them a free pass to torment me.

 

That was how he broke me.

 

That was how he gave up on me.

 

He made it seem like he didn't care, all he wanted was to keep his fame and reputation intact. Not looking back at him hurt me so much. But then again, seeing his dazzling blue eyes will make me forget everything and go back to him. I can't do that; he can't do that either. We're both in constant pain and it's not fair.

 

I felt Dani's delicate hand hold mine, which made me bring my attention back to her. “Are you okay?” she asked. I wasn't sure anymore. I want to say yes, just to reassure her, but I also don't want to lie and pretend—I've done that a lot lately. I nodded anyway, not only because I want her not to worry—she deserves to have a careless night as well—but also because we would be late, and talking about my problems is not something I want to at the moment. I have to move on, period. He lost his chance and blew it. . .It will take some time to forget him, I know, but with time my heart will heal. With time, I will think clearly about what I want, what I truly need. Drama and heartbreak is not included.

 

“Let's go” I forced a smile. She didn't buy it, but also understood that I wasn't in the mood to answer any further questions.

 

She started the engine and we left.

 

Finn's P.O.V

 

I saw her walk away. I was in total pain on every step she took to get away from me. Watching from afar dug an even deeper hole in my heart. I stayed there, and rubbed my face with both of my hands. I felt a light pat on my shoulder. I tilt my head sideways just to see Cameron with an apologetic look on his face. “I am sorry, Finn”

 

“No, that's not the end of the plan, Cam” I said, smiling. He furrowed his eyebrows in confusion.

 

“You really don't know how to accept a no, right?” he asked, which made me laugh. I shook my head in amusement and crossed my arms across my chest, grinning.

 

“By now, you should know me better than that, my dear friend” I replied and went back to the car. “Shawn, did you bring your guitar?” I asked. He nodded and smiled widely, already knowing his respective part of the plan. “And Jack, do you have the camera?” I asked to make sure. They nodded. Cameron still had a confused look.

 

“What are you going to do?” he asked.

 

“The right thing”

 

Gwen's P.O.V

 

You could hear the loud music blasting through the stereo. Dani held her date's arm, but never left my side. We got in together and walked together. Through the whole way to our table, people were staring at me, but I tried to shake it off. I gulped the lump in my throat nervously though, because I was afraid that due to so much attention, I would trip and fall, making a fool out of myself. But Dani had a reassuring smile the whole time, letting me know that everything would be alright. So I relaxed and kept walking, always focused on my steps, just in case.

 

When we got to the table, we sat down. Dani kept chatting with some people while I was quietly there, sitting shyly with nothing to talk about. I don't mind though, I know that Dani has always been the talkative-and-social kind of girl. I was always the quiet and shy one, with not too many words to say.

Suddenly, two girls arrived to our table. I knew them, they were Cassidy and Naomi, we had Calculus together. They had big and bright smiles as they stared at me.

 

“Oh my, God Gwen! You look amazing” Cassidy said, making me smile. Naomi nodded in agreement.

 

“Yeah, Gwen, seriously, that dress looks beautiful on you” Naomi agreed.

 

“Aww, thank you guys” I replied. When they walked away, Dani nudged my shoulder playfully, which made me bring my attention back to her.

 

“You see? It's not so bad. Aren't you glad that you're here?” she asked. I thought about that for a moment and then offered her a big, real, and happy smile.

 

“I actually am” I said.  

 

“Now, come one! Let's show them how a pregnant girl can dance” she said and grabbed my hand, dragging me to the dance floor. I laughed the whole time, and danced with her, we held hands and started swinging from side to side, enjoying the moment.

 

Someone screamed though. At first I thought it was just the excitement of the moment. You know, the party going hard, maybe you sneaked inside the school a drink or two and got carried away afterwards. This scream was something you hear in concerts. Then another scream, then another.

 

“There he is! Oh my, God. DO YOU SEE HIM!? OH MY, GOD! I LOVE YOU” I heard more screaming. I exchanged looks with Dani, and we furrowed our eyebrows in confusion, still not understanding what was going on.

 

“Hello, guys” that voice.

 

Crap.

 

Crap.

 

Crap.

 

Please tell me he didn't. He wouldn't.

 

“Has anyone seen Gwen?” he asked into the microphone. The crows started to disperse, allowing me to see Finn on stage more clearly. I crossed my arms across my chest as I stared up at him.

 

“Gwen, hey” he said. People were chattering and whispering things, making the attention go to me, once again. “You know? There are a lot of things that were left unsaid between us, and you were too hurt to allow me to tell you all those million things I was dying to share with you” he said, slowly, I started to take small steps to the front. “You opened up to me and showed me what truly happiness felt like. You taught me how to live and how to see things another way. I was cold, selfish, and a complete traitor. Which is not fair considering how you treated me the opposite way” he kept going. His touching words making me melt.

 

“Which is why, I came here to do the right thing” he stared at the other side of the stage, where the Jacks held a camera. “Hey guys, Finn here. Today's video is not a Q & A, or a new music video, or anything like that. Today I'm here to share the truth. Many and many months ago I met this beautiful girl. I got carried away and took things too far. She got pregnant because of me. And for several months I've been hiding it all along. Denying that in fact, I am the father of that so rumored baby. Is not a rumor, it is the truth. I am here in front of this whole crowd admitting that I did get a girl pregnant. That girl in the picture you all saw, is Gwen” he turned his attention back to me. “She is the girl I love”

 

I stopped dead in my tracks.

 

Did he just—

 

Is this for real?

 

He loves me?

 

He started walking out of stage and towards me, a big smile on his face. When he was in front of me, he grabbed my hands and stared at me with his eyes, making me weak. “I love you, Gwen. . .I love you so much it hurts me. I don't know how you feel. But for once, I want to be honest about how I feel”

 

“I hate you” I replied, a tear rolled down my cheek. His face fell, and I brought my hand to his cheek, caressing it tenderly. “I hate you for crawling into my heart too deeply, that it was impossible to forget you. But you're here and made me realize how much I love you too. You were a jerk, indeed, but you are my jerk, and I love you” I said and grabbed his face, bringing his lips to mine. Everyone started cheering around us, but in that moment, when our lips were connected, I didn't care about anyone. That kiss is what I needed and just now do I realize it. He finally admitted to his fans the truth. He put his fame aside for. . .Me? It was too hard to believe it, but it was true. He confessed to his millions of fans that he is the father and that he loves me. That's all I've ever wanted.

 

When he pulled away, he smiled, cute dimples showing. “I missed that so fucking much” he whispered into my ear. I nodded in agreement and mouthed ‘me too’

 

“Shawn, come on out!” Finn said. I looked back at the stage and saw Shawn coming outside. The crowd erupted in screams and cheering.

 

“This goes for Gwen. She is the strongest girl I've ever met. She deserves to be happy" he said. The music started playing and he started singing.  

 

Finn locked gazes with me and smiled, “Would you care to dance?”

 

I nodded, “I would love to”

 

He grabbed my hand and we walked to the center of the gym, under the spotlight. Everyone else grabbing their partners. I saw in the far end. Dani was with, Alec? I frowned at her but she shrugged it off. He was trying his best not to get noticed by Miss Jacobs and started dancing with Dani. My gaze went back to Finn.

“I love you” he said.

 

“I love you too” I replied. He pecked my lips and we swayed back and forth, enjoying every moment. I felt happy. All my problems vanished away and I was finally having a good time. This night was beautiful and all I've ever wanted.

 

And then it happened. . .

 

I pulled away from Finn, who held a concerned expression. “Gwen, are you okay!?” he said frantically. I started breathing heavily, trying to calm down. But it wasn't working.

 

“F-Finn” I said, groaning. I started holding my stomach. “I think the baby's coming” I said. And with those words, he started freaking out. Well, everyone did.

 

“Anyone, call the fucking ambulance! My girlfriend is giving birth!” he screamed at the top of his lungs. Aww, he called me his girlfriend. Crap, focus Gwen! You're in freaking labor!

 

He grabbed my hand and I held it tightly, probably cutting his blood circulation. But hey, this hurts me more than his poor little hand. I sat in a chair and tried to even my breaths. It hurt like hell.

 

“It hurts, argh!” I said, tears streaming down my face. I tried to hold on with everything I had. I tried to be strong till someone arrives. Several minutes later—it felt like ages—we heard the ambulance sirens outside, which made me sigh in relief. Finn helped me get up and they out me in a wheel chair. They hurriedly took me to the ambulance truck. Finn beside me the whole time. Dani and Alec rushed with us. When we had to get in, they out me inside the truck they all got inside as well. Alec looked at me with a reassuring smile.

 

“Everything will be alright; I am here for you” he said. I screamed in pain. I closed my eyes and then opened them again as I heard Finn's voice.

 

“Baby, breath. You can do it. I am here for you as always. I'm not going anywhere” he said giving me a kiss on my forehead. I tried to do that—breathing. I tried to breath in and out. I'm almost there. . .I'm about to give birth and it feels so surreal. It's hard to believe that already nine months have gone by and I'm about to give birth to the little person that started it all.

 

I tried to calm down once again and do exactly what Finn told me.

 

Breathing.

 

Chapter 60 — Welcome to the World my Baby

The ambulance finally came to a stop and I can't explain with just words how relieved I felt. It was hurting so badly. I held onto Alec's and Finn's hands. I'm sure I was squeezing their hands so damn hard, but compared to how I was feeling, they will have to suck it up.

 

They quickly put me on a wheel chair and we went inside the Hospital. I breathed in and out.

 

In.

 

Out.

 

In.

 

Out.

 

I held my stomach tightly, tears rolling down my cheeks. Finn held my hand and kept saying how everything was going to be okay. I highly doubt that at this point, seriously. Alec came rushing, phone in hand. “I called mom and dad, they're on its way” he said and I sighed in relief. All I want is for my parents to be here as well, I need their support.

 

After what seemed like forever, they took me to a room and changed me to the hospital's gown, then made me lie on the bed. Finn was holding my hand the entire time.

 

“Gwen, everything will be alright” Dani reassured me. I nodded, but I couldn't concentrate on anything other than the fact that this hurt like hell. I can't believe every single mom goes through this. They really are heroes.

 

“Oh my, God, Gwen!” I heard my mom as she rushed inside the room, followed by my dad. The both stood by me, and that was enough to help me calm down at least one bit. “We also called Erin and Henry, they're on its way” my mom said, which made me open my eyes widely with terror.

 

“Who are them?” Finn asked. My mom noticed what she did, so she was the one to speak.

“They are, um. . .Very close family friends”

 

Finn nodded and his attention went back to me. “Baby, you're doing great” he said.

 

“Really? Because I feel like punching the wall until my knuckles bleed” I groaned like for the millionth time.

“That's normal, darling. When I was pregnant with your brother, I felt like strangling your father” my mom said, making my dad laugh.

 

“Yeah, I remember that! She grabbed me by the hem of my shirt and started screaming at me at the top of her lungs” he said, smiling. I tried to smile too, but I kept having contractions.

 

“Argh! I can't anymore! Dammit, just please someone take it out!” I said. My mom stroke cheeks tenderly, making me lock gazes with her. She was smiling reassuringly.

 

Then like three nurses came in, and started taking me to the delivery room. “I only want mom!” I said as I saw everyone rushing with us. My mom nodded and then we were off. We were off to delivering my baby.

 

• • •

 

They made me lie on the bed. The Doctor started putting her gloves. Then she stood in front of me, with a big smile.

 

“Gwen, I need you to push” she instructed. “And always breath, never forget to keep breathing. In order for this to be successful, you have to put your part too” she said with a sweet and calming voice. I nodded and started doing my best to do those things at the same time.

 

How can you push but at the same time breath in and out? How the hell?

 

My mom stood beside me, holding my hand. I squeezed so hard I was kind of scared I would break it any second. But she kept reassuring me that everything was fine.

 

“Come on Gwen, you're doing great!”

 

***

 

“It's time” Dani informed me after what seemed like forever.

 

I grabbed the stick tightly, but couldn't flip it over to see the results, I was frozen on my spot. Dani noticed this and hugged me. “You can do it” she whispered in my ear. I nodded slowly and finally, flipped it over.

 

“Oh, my God” I said covering my mouth with my hand. One tear rolled down my cheek and I fell into the ground. I can't believe it; this can't be happening. “It's positive” I informed and dropped the stick beside me. I couldn't move, I couldn't stand. . .Nothing. Dani kneeled in front of me and hugged me. I rested my head on her chest and cried even more. She rubbed my arm up and down, trying to shush me. I shook my head repeatedly, still not believing this.

 

***

Hurt.

 

Pain.

 

Betrayal.

 

My heart cracked in a billion pieces as I picture him smiling to himself while writing those tweets, while lying to all of his fans. I am furious, sad, broken. . .He made me believe I was special, that he was actually into me. He made me believe that those moments we had. . .Meant something. But here I am, crying pathetically in front of the only boy in my entire life, that made me be head over heels but at the same time, heartbroken. . .

 

“Gwen, please don't cry—”

 

“What do you want me to do then!?” I screamed exasperated, as I backed away from him. “Do you expect to see me dancing around happy with life after you lied to me? After you made me go through this? So, not only you made me pregnant, but also you say those horrible things behind my back and expect me to be alright? It doesn't fucking work like that, Finn, it doesn't!” I folded my arms, he tried to walk towards me but I raised my hand for him to stop. “And to top it all off, you come here when I clearly told you not to talk to me ever again. Seriously, what is wrong with you?”

 

***

 

Hey guys, Finn here. Today's video is not a Q & A, or a challenge, or anything like that. Today I'm here to share the truth. Many and many months ago I met this beautiful girl. I got carried away and took things too far. She got pregnant because of me. And for several months I've been hiding it all along. Denying that in fact, I am the father of that so rumored baby. Is not a rumor, it is the truth. I am here in front of this whole crowd admitting that I did get a girl pregnant. That girl in the picture you all saw, is Gwen” he turned his attention back to me. “She is the one that I love”

 

I stopped dead in my tracks.

 

Did he just?—

 

Is this for real?

 

He loves me?

 

***

 

“Gwen, sweetie, come on, you're doing great, just a little bit more” my mom said. I took every ounce of strength I could go keep going. I was going to make it through. Lately, I've been through so much worse. And it seems like all of the events I had to deal with, helped me build some sort of protective armor. I dealt with so much pain that I can't let this get on my way.

 

I started pushing hardly. “I see the head!” the Doctor said. I kept pushing and pushing, until I felt like I was about to give up. But I kept going. . .

 

The tears kept streaming down my face but not even that pulled me down.

 

I started hearing crying and more crying.   My view was still kind of blurry because of the tears. I wiped my eyes and then stared at the Doctor, who was holding my baby.

 

“You did it” my mom whispered and kissed me in the cheek.

 

“Congratulations, Gwen. It is a healthy baby girl” the Doctor said. I took a deep breath, and carefully lied on my back, finally relaxed that it is over.

 

When they cleaned my baby, the nurse holding her walked towards me. And with a big smile and tenderness, wrapped her with a pink cloth. Then she passed her to me. Happy tears started falling down as I stared at her tiny blue eyes.

 

“She's beautiful” I said, my voice breaking.

 

It was over.

 

She was here, born in this world.

 

After months of crying, fighting, laughing, overcoming the constant judgement of everyone. She was finally here in my hands, looking at me. She was safe and sound. She seemed healthy and looked beautiful. She was so little and fragile. I feared that she may break.

 

“I am your mom” I said, softly placing a kiss on her head.

 

__________________________________

 

The End

 

Last Author's Note

 SO, that is it guys, that was the last Chapter of this Book. But, of course you noticed that I left some things open. You know what that means. . .

 

SEQUEL. 

 

You need to know what is the baby's name. Or what happens when Finn finds out about the adoption idea. Erin and Hnery are on their way too. There are things that need an answer. I am indeed working on the Sequel at this moment, but soon will be up and ready for everyone's enjoyment. 

 

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR READING, I HOPE YOU LIKED THIS JOURNEY LIKE I DID. 

Impressum

Tag der Veröffentlichung: 04.06.2016

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Widmung:
To my family, who have always been there through every single moment. To my amazing group of friends, the most genuine group of people I have never met. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for every laugh and every time you have caused a smile on my face.