Her Secrets

She ran as her wet hair clung to her body. She looked back to see if his shadow was still there. Her small feet splashed in the mud, raising it to her legs. Her arms pushed through the thick air as her breath slowly disappeared. She couldn't see him, but she could hear his foot steps. She could hear his panting and could smell his stench of whiskey.

Black tears rolled down her cheeks as she pushed through the woods, touching each cold Birch tree as she passed it. Her pale skin shined in the moonlight, almost twinkling. Her breathing was heavy, so heavy that she knew he could hear her anywhere. The caliginous world felt like it was closing in on her, even though she's been running for what seems like hours, still getting no where. Her head spun, going through her mistakes, regretting leaving, having half a mind to turn back, but she didn't; she kept going, desperately in a search for a way out of the hell that was her life.

"Samantha!" He roared. His screeched raised the hairs on her arms and her breath hitched. She stopped and looked around. Surrounding by tree's, she was trapped. He finally had her blocked. He was finally going to win.

She reached her hands out to her sides and closed her eyes. Taking in the musky smell of the air and calming her heartbeat, she stood still. Her face pounded with pain. Her cheeks throbbed with aching, excruciating pain. She slowly reached her hand up to her cheek. She flinched at the touch. She lowered her hand and the bright red blood glimmered in the moonlight. She wiped her blood stained hand on her bare leg and thats when she heard it. It roared over all of the trees. It echoed through the mountains and hills. It gave her goosebumps. It made her stomach turn upside down and out her throat.

"Bitch!" He screamed. She ran to a bush and crouched down beside it. She held her breath, terrified it would set him off, but it made her chest feel heavy and her head spin in circles. "Sammy, baby, darling, love." She cringed. "I'm sorry, it wont happen again."

She touched her cheek again. She bit her fist because that was the only thing keeping her screams in. It hurt so bad, worse than all the times before.

She promised herself something, one of the biggest promises she's ever made to anyone. One more punch, one more slap, one more unwanted touch, and poof; she was gone. Keeping this promise was the most important thing she's ever done.

After countless lectures from her bestfriend telling her to leave, she's finaly doing it on her own, but not like she thought; she knew he was going to kill her if she left, and thats why she has to do what she's going to do, she has no choice.

"Samantha," His creepy voice rung. She quickly hid behind a tree as he gave the chain saw one more tug. It spun and spun making her sick. "Come out and play."

She peaked her head out and held her breath. He walked right past her. She didn't know what she had to do, but she had to do something. She couldn't let him get away, not again.

She blamed herself. Afterall, she always argued, "I am the one who argued. I am the one who forgot to pick up the towel. I am the one who made the dinner too hot. I am the one who forgot to call him. I am the one who didn't smile when talking to his boss. I am the one who forgot to kiss him in the morning. I am the one who keeps messing up." She blamed herself for everything, because thats how she was raised.

As he took a couple more steps she bent down to her knees. She picked up a rock that laid at her feet. She tightly gripped it and raised it over her head.

"Ahh!" She shouted as she came out from behind the trees. His surprised face was priceless. His black eye brows almost raised above his forehead, touching his scalp.  His mouth was open with pure amazement, something she's never seen before. His eyes. That was her favorite part. His eyes were wide open, staring, looking into her soul, wondering why, thinking where he went wrong, but that was the biggest part; he was always wrong. He went about everything wrong. Women are not an object. You cannot control them, use them, and only take them out when you want a swing at them or when your buddies want some fun.

 His dark black eyes stayed open with fear, and as terrible as it sounds, it made her happy, elated with joy actually. The fear he showed was a refreshing change. For once it wasn't her crying, for once he wasn't on top, for once it was he who wasn't willing.

She raised the rock and let it drop. She heard the crack, pop and gushing. She heard his cry as he hit the ground. His knees dug into the wet mud, and then he fell backwards, slowly and with pain filled ehes. The chain saw fell from his hands and went silent.

She was stood alone, panting still, she looked down at him. She was relieved; it was finally over. She looked up at the trees towering over her and smiled, the first real smile she's had for years. Everything was silent. The only thing alive was the crickets echoing through her ears.

  She almost thought it was over. Just to be sure she stood their for a second, studying him. She looked at the gash on his head. She imagined the pain. She hoped he was in pain. She hoped he suffered like he made her suffer.

After what seemed like an hour she decided it was really over. She sighed and smiled. She looked down at her blood stained legs and closed her eyes. She realized her face wasn't throbbing anymore. Her face didn't hurt. Nothing hurt. She was okay. She was finally okay.

There are no words that described what she was feeling at that moment. Her constant trembling hands subsided and the terrified feeling in the pit of her gut was gone. Samantha went everyday with that feeling. No know whether today would be the day he finally did it, whether she was going to make it into work, whether she would have to drive three hours to a different hospital so they didn't catch on. She exhaled all of the worry that she kept inside and she finally let her tense body relax.

She looked at him once more and shook her head in disgust. She spit on him the way he spit on her everyday. Just when she thought she was safe and began to walk away, he rose and grabbed her leg.

"Not so fast you little b***h!" He shouted. She screamed in terror. His large cold hand wrapped around her ankle, pulling her to the wet, cold dirt. Her face slammed onto the chain saw. She screamed out in excruciating pain. He let go of her ankle. His face showed worry but his cold heart would have never worried for her. Never.

 She held what was left of her face. He took a step back and stood still. She laid still holding her breath, too afraid of the pain that would spread if she let it out.  She watched as he approached her and then she took her moment. She grabbed the chain saw and then everything went red. She let out the tears she's been holding in for years. She screamed and cried over him. She let the cold white tears stream down her cheeks, because she was finally free.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

She opened her eyes and the bright light blinded her. She wasn't sure what had just happened. She wasn't sure about anything. Her face was still sticky with blood. Her head was pounding. She looked around and realized she wasn't in the woods anymore. After taking a second to recollect herself, she began walking to the nearest hospital. She didn't know how bad her face was, but she had to get it checked out.

She walked into the hospital, getting odd expressons from everyone she passed. She looked around but everyone seemed so busy. She was just about to turn around and walk out when someone grabbed her arm.

"Can I help you?" She turned around and a tall man with a bright white coat was standing before her. His peircing blue eyes caught her attention, and then she was lost for words. He tilted her head to the left and inhaled deeply. "Come this way." He said while taking her hand. She took a seat on the cold silver table and he examined her closer.

"Is it bad?" Her quiet voice barely made a sound. He didn't answer.

"What happened?" He asked while avoiding her first question.

"Well," She began, and for a slight moment she was actually going to tell him. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. "It was just a hiking accident." He lifted a needle to her face and stuck her deeply.

"I'm going to have to sow it up." He paused "After your face will feel very tight."

"What did you just give me?"

"Its just something to numb the area." He answered quickly. She nodded slightly, anymore and she would scream in pain. She took a deep breath and moved her wavy red hair from her face. "I'm Dr. Neisse, by the way."

"Samantha." She bared herself as he rose the needle and thread to her cheek. She squeezed her eyes and disappeared so she wouldn't feel the pain. When she opened her eyes he was standing over her with a big smile on his face.

 

"There." He said. "All better."

She rose her hand to her cheek and grazed the stiches. She closed her eyes in pain but didn't drop her hand.

"Here," He said while handing her a mirror. "Take a look."

She reluctantly rose it to her face and opened her eyes. Her first thought was how ugly she looked. He was right about her face feeling tight. It even looked a little off center. She figured the chain saw grazed her and took off her skin, not enough to break the bone. She took herself as lucky. She touched her matted down, red, stringy, wet, long hair and sighed. She knew she had no where to stay tonight and it was already well into the night. She was standing, alone. She could barely remember what happened, but what she did remember kept flashing back into her mind over and over again.

 "Thanks." She said without making eye contact.

"Now, you should check in in a couple days to see how its healing, but other than that, you're going to be fine." He smiled. She nodded without any emotion and then stood up.

"Thanks." She repeated. She aimlessly walked out. So many feelings were over flowing her. She couldn't even wrap her head around what had just happened. Was it really over? Was he really never going to hurt her again?

She made her way outside. It was starting to get dark already. Within seconds it seemed like it turned pitch black. She couldn't wrap her head around how so much time passed. To her it seemed just like minutes.

 The moon barely lit up the road enough for her to see. She began walking down the deserted wet pavement. Her hair was still wet, clinging to her trembling back. Her small feet took each step, one harder than the other. It didn't matter how far she walked, and it seemed like forever, she still had a feeling that he would come back. She had the slithering feeling under her skin. She had the bruises throbbing with every beat of her warm heart. Her face didn't hurt anymore, but that was the only thing.

She stopped and realized that the sky was starting to lighten. She looked down the road. It seemed like it would never end. It was taunting her. The pavement had turned to dirt, but she didn't realize how long ago it did.

She shook her head and looked over to her right. The road became narrower and the bright green tree's laid not far in the distance. She walked over to the ledge just steps away from the dirt road. Thousands of boulders and sharp rocks laid below her. A slight wind blew over her, taking her hair off her body. She closed her eyes and held out her arms, and in that moment she felt like she was flying. She imagined herself in the air, arms wide, eyes open, having a smile that could last forever. She wished she could fly away. She wished it all away like the wind. She knew it could all go away. She knew how just as her toes floated over the edge. She listened as her feet drug little pebbles over the edge, echoing with every drop.

"Samantha?" She heard a beautiful voice ask. Its smoothness made her smile. It reminded her of her father. She took a deep breath as another gust of wind blew over her.

"I'm coming." She whispered into the air. She inched herself just an inch closer when she felt two hands on her sides. She smiled again thinking it was the touch of a loved one, but her fantasy was ripped away when she was pulled from the edge.

"Samantha!" He scolded her. She looked up into his bright blue eyes.

"Dr. Neisse?" Her hoarse voice mumbled.

"What the hell do you think you were doing up there?" She looked over at the beautiful drop off and wanted to tell him, but she couldn't. She shook her head as the tears whelled up in her eyes. Everything was so complicated at the moment. Nothing made sense and she felt lost.

"I can't." She managed to whispered through the tears. He lifted his hands and whiped the dirty tears from her blood stained face.

"Samantha," He sighed. He knew that he couldn't get involved but he couldn't leave her, not like that. "Have you been walking all night?" He asked. He looked down at her but she looked away. "Do you have a place to stay?" He asked. His blue eyes met her brown eyes and for a slight second he was mesmorized. He broke eye contact and opened the door to his white car. She looked at him confused. "You could use a warm shower and I can't leave you out here." She didn't want to get in the car with him but she did. "Okay." He sighed as he turned on the car.

The drive was long. She didn't make eye contact. She didn't say a word. She was thankful, yes, but still so confused.

He wasn't far behind her. He wasn't sure what he was doing. He didn't know this woman. He didn't know how that cut got on her face. He didn't know anything about her. He didn't know if she was dangerous, but still he invited her into his house. He was allowing her to use his shower. Why?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"Here we are." He said as he pulled into the drive way. His hands shook as he took the key out of the ignition. Samantha, solid as a rock, didn't move. He walked around to the other side and opened her door. She reluctantly took his hand. She wasn't afraid of him, but she was wondering of his motives.

They entered the house and she followed him upstairs to the bathroom. He turned on the hot water and adjusted it. He walked to the cabniet and took out a wash cloth and towel. He smiled as he laid them onto the sink. She watched him in aw.

She loved his house. It wasn't something you would have expected for a single man. She stopped herself as that crossed her mind. She didn't even know if he was single. What would his wife think when she comes home and there is a naked woman in her shower? Samantha all of a sudden got very nervous.

"I'll be downstairs. You can come down when you're ready." He smiled. She didn't move. He inched himself past her, trying not to make contact. As he walked down the hall to his room he realized she didn't have any clothes to change into. He ran to his closet and grabbed a pair of sweats. He walked back to the closed bathroom door. The beating of the shower was far too loud for her to hear him over. He squeezed his eyes tightly and knocked on the door. "I'm leaving a pair of sweats on the counter for you!" He shouted. She opened the shower door and looked at him. He opened his eyes, catching her looking at him.

"Thank you." She smiled. He looked at her for a second longer and then realized how inappropriate that was. He closed his eyes tightly and then backed into the wall. He heard her giggle. His head slammed against the door and his world spun around him. He slowly slid to the ground and held his head. Samantha ran out of the shower and met him on the ground.

"Ahh." He groaned in pain. She lifted her hand to his head and ran her fingers over the large bump on it.

"Are you okay?" She asked. He opened his eyes to see her, naked, leaning over him.

"Uh, I'm," He stuttered. She reached to the sink and pulled the towel around her. Before she got it around her he noticed the marks on her body. She was bruised and cut from head to toe. "Samantha," He gasped. He reached out to touch the purple bruise on her arm but she pulled away.

"Dr.," She began.

"Adam." He corrected her. She sighed as she shook her head.

"Don't." She closed her eyes.

"Who did that to you?" Adam asked.

"No one." She lied.

"Samantha," He scolded her.

"Don't!" She shouted as she fell back. She leaned again the wall and burst into tears. "You don't know me! You don't know anything! Don't try to help me!" His voice slowly got quieter. "Don't." She whispered.

He didn't try to touch her. He didn't say anything. He rose to his knees and sat beside her. She looked at him with her broken tears. He put his arm around her and she buried her face into his chest. She clung to his shirt. Each tear was excruciating pain. She whimpered in his arms as the roaring shower continued behind them.

He didn't understand why she was crying, but he was there for her.  After a couple minutes she sat up and hid her face in her hands. She didn't know how to explain herself. This man was being nothing but kind to her, and she was nothing but rude to him.

"I'm sorry." She whispered as she raised her head. "I don't know what came over me."

"Its okay." He smiled as he stood up. He held out his hand and helped her to her feet. She stood up and then realized how wet he was.

"I'm sorry." She tightened her grip on her towel.

"Its fine, really." He smiled. She didn't understand how he could always smile. "Finish your shower and then we can go get something to eat; you must be starving."

"Okay." She sighed. She dropped her towel and stepped back into the warm shower. He winced as he looked at all her scars and cuts. She didn't show her pain but he knew how much she must have been in. He closed his eyes and walked down stairs. He stopped a couple steps down and sat down. His head was spinning.

He didn't know this woman at all but something was drawing him to her. He felt like he had to help her. Her eyes left him tantalized. Her bright red hair made him want to touch it. It was something about her, something he had to explore and get to know.

Adam shook his head and walked downstairs. After pacing for a while and scolding himself for being so stupid, he took a breath, long and hard. He placed his hands on his flat stomach and whiped his wet hands on his jeans. He slid the slopping wet shirt off over his head and put it in his hands. He swung it side to side as he walked upstairs. He got to the top and stopped when he saw her little bare feet. Adam looked up at her. Samantha was standing at the top of the stairs, her red wavy hair hung down from the wet ness, the sweat pants just barely hanging on her hips, and the cutest nervous face Adam had ever seen.

"Hey." Adam smiled.

"Hi." Samantha nodded. Adam looked down at the shirt in his hands and realized he was actually doing something before he got distracted.

"Oh! I have to go upstairs and get changed." He said as she walked past her. "You can wait down stairs and I'll be down in a bit." He suggested. Sam nodded and headed down the stairs. Adam walked to his room and put on a clean, dry shirt. He combed his hair and slid on his shoes.

He walked down the stairs quietly and peaked into the living room. He watched her as she slowly walked around the room. She touched the yellow paper walls. They felt cool under her skin. She looked at his pictures. The biggest one was Adam in a graduation gown. His bright white smile shined almost as bright at the proudness on the faces of his parents, or who she was assuming his parents.

She touched their faces. He really did seem to have the perfect life. He was perfect, everything about him was perfect. She had to leave before she messed things up. She had to leave before her unperfectness rubbed off on him... She abruptly turned around and started to run out until she saw Adam. He stood straight and she stopped dead in her tracks.

"I have to go." She spit out.

"But," Was all he managed to get in.

"I really have to go." She said as she rushed to the door. She stepped out into the warm wind and stopped at his voice.

"Wait!" He begged. "Lets get something to eat." He suggested. She didn't turn around, but she didn't continue to run. "Please."

"Why?" Sam asked while turning around. He opened his mouth but he didn't know why. He just had this weird feeling and he wanted to get to know her.

"I don't know." He truthfully answered. Samantha shook her head and began to walk again. "Do you even have anywhere to go?" He shouted from the porch. She stopped and then he knew the answer. "Please, its just something to eat." He lowered his shoulders, thinking of anything that would make her stay. "You must be starving." He stepped onto the soft ground and opened the door to his car. She turned around and started to walk closer to him. He held out his hand and hers met with his. He helped her into the car and he closed the door. He sighed with a smile and walked around to his side.

 "What would you like?" The waiter at the Cafe asked them.

"I'll have a cup of black coffee, and pancakes." Adam smiled.

"Same." Sam mumbled. Once the waitor left it was just awkward stares left.

"So," Adam hummed. "Samantha," He smiled. "Thats a beautiful name."

"Thank you." Her eyes glimmered and again, Adam was tantalized. "So, Adam," She mimicked. "What made you decide to become a doctor? And don't give me any of that "I just want to help people" crap." He couldn't help but smile. The waiter came back again and gave them their coffee.

"I'm just in it for the money." He answered. His face went completely serious and for a slight second Sam was disgusted.

"You're lying." Samantha laughed.

"You're gullable." He smiled.

"Seriously," Sam replied. "Why?" He sighed and set his coffee down.

He's never told this to anyone. Its never been brought up and he wanted to keep it that way, but there was something about her. There was something that made him want to tell her everything.

"About twenty years ago I lost my brother, Jason." He gulped hard, his hands shook and he avoided eye contact at all cost. "He was only fifteen."

"How?" She mumbled. He didn't answer right away. "You don't have to tell me."

"He died of cancer." He said quickly. He figured saying it all at once wouldn't hurt as much; boy, was he wrong. "He got diagnosed two years earlier." He paused, hoping to find the strength. "After a couple months the medicine started working and he got better." For a slight second his blue eyes glimmer but what he was going to say cast a dark shadow over it. "But then it came back. It hit him all at once. I had to watch him suffer." His lip twitched as the tears covered his eyes. "He was in pain every second. He was slowly dying and the doctors did nothing." He finally looked up at her.

"I'm sorry."

"Why?"

"What do you mean why?" She whispered.

"Why are you sorry?" He didn't help.

"Because its sad."

"But its not your fault. Why are you sorry?" She thought he was messing with her but his facial expressions were completely serious.

"I don't know why." She answered. She was a little upset that he was so blunt and rude.

"Then why did you say it?"

"Because its just something you say. I say I'm sorry when someone has a head ache, even though its not my fault and I can't do anything to help. I'm sorry is just something people say to make other people know its okay, and their not alone." Her voice wasn't soothing, it was more blunt like his was.

"I'm sorry." He said ashamed.

"Why?" She mocked. He looked up with a amusement.

"I didn't mean to blow up on you. I just never talked about Jason to anyone before."

"Its okay." She smiled.

The waiter came back over with their pancakes. He stopped a second too long and stared at Sam. He noticed his staring and quickly walked away, but it left her uneasy.

She looked down at the table and felt her cheek. The shot that made the pain go away had finally wore off. She flinched at the pain and quickly removed her hand.

Adam abruptly took up and straightened his shirt.

"Where are you going?" Sam asked.

"No where. Just relax." He smiled. He walked behind the diners counter and he disappeared into the back.

Sam sat nervous. She jumped when she heard a loud noise. She leaned to her left and caught a glimpse of what was happening. Adam had the waiter pinned to the wall, his muscles bulging with tension, the waiters feet floating above the dirt stained tile.

"You don't know what she's gone through. Maybe you'll think about that next time you think of staring at someone. I wouldn't walk around judging people if I had a face like yours." She could barely hear him speak, but what she did hear made the hair on her arms raise. His voice when he talked to her was light and soothing, but his voice then was dark and disturbing.

At that moment Sam has a flashback. *Smack* He reached his arm out again. *Smack* She flinched at the memory.

She could hear his repulsive voice say, "Stay still, this wont hurt," He'd pause for a second. "Unless you want it to." He'd finish. He'd pin her arms down and open her legs with his knees. She was helpless, alone, always.

He let the waiter down and straightened his shirt. He walked back to the table like nothing happened. Sam had tears in her eyes, she was shaking head to toe, covered in chills, and terrified.

Adam sat down unaware of her state. He took the napkin from the table and laid it out on his lap. He looked over at her and realized something was wrong. When he slid closer to her to see waht was wrong, she jumped up in terror. She stood lifeless for a second. She was shaking head to toe. She was sweating, but her skin felt ice cold. 

"Samantha?" Adam stood but she ran out faster than anything he's ever seen. He chased after her but she was gone before he knew it.

After hours of driving, checking every nook and crany of that town, he gave up. He drove off a dirt road and parked the car. He placed the keys in the cup holder and then stepped out onto the wet dirt. His brand new black shoes sqooshed into the mud. He walked furthur into the woods, following his path. He took a walk to his place. It was off a fishing path. He could hear the water roaring in the distance.

He stopped when he got there. The bridge sat just feet away from him. He stepped onto the light brown wood and smiled when it cracked. It took him back to when he was five years old and his Grandpa took him fishing there. The cracking use to scare him, but now it sounds like home.

He walked up the bridge and stopped at the middle. He walked closer to the wooden rail. He leaned over it with just his elbows touching it. He sighed deeply and looked down at the rushing water below him.

It was his favorite spot indeed. His Grand-Father use to take him there all the time. It was their fishing spot. It was where they got over Grandma's death and where their wedding was. It was everything for Adam. It was where his parents got married and its the only place that can take his worries away.

Birds flew high above the bright blue sky. Green trees towered over the crystal clear water. Bull frogs and crickets echoed in the distance. Adam looked down at his reflection and closed his eyes. Usually this was where his happy place but he felt like there was a black cloud hanging over his shoulder.

"I'm sorry." A voice said behind him. He abruptly turned around. He was frightened, and especially shocked when he saw who it was.

"How did you," His voice trailed off.

"I didn't mean to find you here; I just came here to think." She nervously walked closer to the edge and looked over it. The wind blew, taking her beautiful red hair off her back. She looked down at her reflection, just like she always did, but this time she jumped back in tears. She saw herself, her scar, everything. It was like a complete flash back of her whole past

She fell to her knees in agony. He wanted to help her, but he stood still. He wasn't able to move, he wasn't able to tell her it was okay, he wasn't able to comfort her, and he didn't know why.

"I'm hideous!" She cried out. He looked down at her, still frozen. He finally snapped out of it and knelt to one knee.

"No." He said quietly. He slid his hand under her chin, lifting her to his eye level. "You are beautiful." He placed both his hands on her cheeks. He knew very well that her cheek would be tender, but he had to do it.

He slid his thumb over her stitches. She closed her eyes, not in pain, but in disgust. She thought she looked ugly and everytime she looked at those stitches she thought of him. She thought of what he did and what he put her through.

"Open your eyes." He whispered. She opened her bright green eyes and stared into his.

"How can you say I'm beautiful? I'm scared for life." The tears bubbled up in her eyes.

"Because I can see past the stitches. I can see past your broken heart, past your tears and the wall you are putting up." Adam knew it wasn't from a hiking accident but he wasn't going to ask her what it really was from.

"But you barely know me." She whispered back. He knew she was right and he didn't know how to respond.

She shook her head and stood to her feet. She wiped her eyes and stood tall, something she hasn't done for a while.

"I should go." She began walking away and he didn't know how to stop him.

"Do you even have anywhere to go?" She shouted just as her feet stepped off of the bridge. She stopped dead in her tracks and squinted her nose. "You could stay with me." He suggested. She turned around slowly. His soft eyebrows drew her attention to his bright blue eyes.

"How can you invite a total stranger to stay with you?" She asked. He took a step towards her.

"I don't know." He answered honestly. She was about to keep walking. She knew this was a bad idea. He was going to turn into one of two things; a phyco or he's going to be amazing, a complete dream come true. Either way, nothing good would come out of it. "Please," He begged. He took another step towards her, now just an arms length away.

She looked up at him. She didn't understand this man. Here they are, just having met and she's already taken a shower in his bathroom, and now he's inviting her to stay with him? This was completely crazy and they both knew it.

"Okay." She nodded.

"Okay?" He smiled.

"Okay." She repeated.

"Okay." He said again. He didn't know why he was so happy, but he was.

He walked back to the bridge and leaned back over. She stood not far behind him, but not close enough to see herself in the crystal clear blueness running beneath them.

"Why do you come here?" She asked quietly.

"Because no matter how hard life gets," He paused and sighed. "This place always makes it seem as light as a feather." He answered without turning around, not wanting her to see how close he was to tears.

"How hard could your life be? You're a doctor, you're handsome, and your family looks like they adore you." Part of her became very upset. She couldn't imagine how his life could be so hard.

"Haven't you ever heard the saying, 'Don't judge a book by its cover'?" He rubbed his forehead and sighed again. "You don't know me."

"Then let me know you." She took a step closer and pulled his hand off his forehead so she could look into his beautiful eyes. "I am going to be living with you; I should know something."

"Fine," He looked up, praying the quivering in his stomach would go away. "One answer for one answer." She began to get nervous, but nodded anyways.

"You first." She gulped.

"How'd you get this?" He asked while touching her cheek. She closed her eyes again and squinted them tightly.

"Ask a different question." She snapped.

"The rules was one for one."

"I don't care." She whispered. She looked down into the water, but this time she didn't look away. The tears glazed her eyes over but she refused to let them fall.

"Okay," He said defensively. "Do you have any siblings?"

"Yes."

"Then, why are you-"

"Because I'm not welcomed." She answered before he had the chance to ask. "I'm not like that. I have nothing to be proud of like they do." He wanted to say something to comfort her, something to take her tears away, but he had nothing. "What's so bad about your life?"

"Besides losing my brother," He paused. He wanted to tell her it all, but he liked how she thought he was perfect. "Nothing." He lied.

She knew he was lying, but she didn't pry.

She looked up into his eyes and she shrugged it off. They looked back into the distance. The quietness was just what both of them needed.

"Thats it?" She asked. "Thats what makes your life so unbearable?"

"I guess so." He lied. And again, a small part of her hated him.

"Adam, people die. They leave and never come back. People we love disappear, and we have to live with that. Ironically, its life." Her voice was full of sorrow.

"Who left you?" He asked. He looked over at her, but she didn't speak. Her expression showed a broken heart; someone whos been through hell and back.

She looked down into the water. She watched as a tear fell from her cheek. It was clear but full of screams. It seemed like it went in slow motion. She watched as it splashed into the crystal clear water below her, and disappeared.

She thought that was the only one she would let escape. She thought she was strong enough to hold them in, but she wasn't.

He reached across the empty void and held her hand. She looked up at him, a big teary mess, and smiled. She squeezed his hand tighter and then he pulled her in.

He held her tightly and she sobbed uncontrollably. She hid her face, shamed and hurting. Sam reached around him and clenched to his jacket, tighter than she's ever held onto anyone in her entire life.

"Shh, its okay." He hummed. "Its okay." He laid his cheek on head and brushed her hair away from her face.

"I miss them so much!" She cried. Just hearing her cry almost brought a tear to Adam's eye.

"Its okay to miss them."

She looked up at him, her brown eyes begging him to make her tears go away. They gazed at each other, maybe just a second too long.

She pulled away and exhaled. The wind blew again, making the trees whistle.

"We should go." Sam mumbled.

"Yeah." Adam nodded.

He escorted her to the car and they headed towards the house. Adam's mind toamed like crazy and his heart throbbed. He didn't know what he was doing. He's never done anything like this before, and neither has she. She was moving in with a complete stranger, but she wasn't afraid. For some reason they felt safe together.

For the most part, the car ride was pure silence. When Adam finally decided to break the silence, it took Sam by surprise.

"I know this may be weird," Adam didn't take his eyes off the road.

"Mhm." Sam nodded.

"But I want you to know that you can leave whenever you want."

"I know." She smiled. After a couple minutes she spoke again. "Thank you." He looked over to her and smiled but didn't say anything.

 

About twenty minutes down the road Adam pulled the car over. He took the keys out of the ignition and tossed them on the dashboard.

"Why'd we pull over?" Sam was both confused and scared.

"Because," He smiled. "You can't move into a house with no clothes." He pointed across the street to a clothing store. He was smiling, but she wasn't.

"Adam," She sighed.

"No, Sam, I don't care what you say." He smiled. "I'm buying you clothes."

"Adam, I refuse." She stomped her foot.

"Fine." He got out of the car and walked to the other side. He opened her door and stood in front of her. He smiled, that boyish cute smile.

"What do you think you're doing?" She grinned.

He leaned across her, just brushing her chest with his arm, and unbuckled her seat belt. She slowly pulled away. He stopped when they were face to face. They looked into each others eyes. Their eyes moved rapidly, not able to decide to look at the others lips or eyes.

"Adam," She whispered.

"Yes, Samantha." He smiled. His breath touched her lips and mint filleld her nostrils.

"Adam," She repeated. He slowly moved closer. Her heart was pounding immensely.

"Yes, Samantha." He said even slower.

They were just inches apart. The only thing holding him above her was his hand on the arm of the seat.

She wanted to kiss him. She got a feeling around him, a feeling that she hasn't felt in a long long time. She wanted their lips to meet, but was afraid of what would happen.

He came closer. His beautiful smell pulling her closer. She closed her eyes and let her fears go. She moved into him and their lips met. Fire works went off, heat exploded and his hands magically appeared in her soft hair.

He placed one hand on her cheek and she wrapped her arms around his back. She pushed into him even more, deepening the kiss. Her stomach was doing triple back flips. She liked him, a lot and she dind't know why.

Adam put both hands on her cheeks. He took his thumb and ran it over her stitches, almost forgetting about them. In that moment a flash back appeared in her.

*Smack*

She felt his hands on her.

Touching her.

Feeling her.

She heard his repulsive voice in her ears.

Telling her she wasn't good enough.

Telling her the kitchen wasn't clean enough.

*Smack*

She felt his lips on hers.

His slithering tounge.

 

She abruptly pulled away with tears in her eyes. Adam pulled back and stared at her with soothing eyes.

"Samantha, whats wrong?" He asked.

She pushed past him, almost knocking him on the ground. Her red hair shined in the bright sun. She stepped out into the dirt and knelt to her knees.

Her chest was heavy and her head was throbbing with pain. His face was inplanted in her mind. Everytime she closed her eyes, everytime she blinked, everytime, he was there.

She hit her face into her legs and felt the hot red sun beat on her back. She wheezed, trying to catch her breath, but it wasn't working. She felt claustrophobic, like her world was closing in.

"Sam!" Adam struggled to get out of his situation.

"I... can't.... breath..." She sobbed. Adam placed a hand on her back but that made another flash back come. *Smack* She jumped back, crying even more than before. "No!" She begged.

Adam pulled back. He didn't know what to do.

"No. No. No." She whispered to herself. "He's gone. He can't hurt you anymore."

Adam could barely hear her voice, but heard enough to wonder who he was.

"Samantha," Adam whispered. He got down on his hands and knees, looking up at her face which was facing the ground. "Samantha," She looked at him, with those heartbroken brown eyes. "Its me." He paused. "Its Adam." He slowly got closer to her, inch by inch.

He was just a foot from her when she threw herself into his arms. She held onto his shirt like she was dangling off a mountain.

It took him by surprise. At first his was frozen with his arms spread wide, not knowing what had just happened, but eventually he held her close, just like she needed to be held.

"I'm scared." She confessed. She squeezed him tighter, praying his  face would disappear from her nightmares.

"Its okay to be scared."

She pulled away. At this point she was sitting on his lap, staring into his blue eyes.

"I don't want to be scared."

"Nobody wants to be scared." He sighed. He brushed her hair away from her face. "But you don't have to be scared anymore." He whispered. Her eyes filled with tears once again. "I'm going to be here for you, Samantha."

She opened her mouth but no words came out. She slowly laid her head back down on his chest. He wrapped his arms around her and rocked her back and forth with the wind.

 

 

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Texte: All rights reserved by the author and anyone who steals these words will be punished by the fullest extent of the law
Lektorat: WritingForever
Tag der Veröffentlichung: 24.04.2013

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