Table of Contents

 

Chapter 1: How to Lead a Team

Imagine this: You have actually changed jobs to a new one with higher status. As time passes and you get your new duties, you'll start to display the body language of management-- all the signals of being top of the pecking order, but magnified and formalized.

Your posture might become slightly more erect, spontaneously increasing your height and breadth-both non-verbal signs of supremacy in ape groups, where the bigger and stronger the animal, the more likely it is to be a leader. You might take on the specific expression referred to as a 'plus' face, with direct, a direct gaze and a serious facial expression. You'll be most likely to take first turn, to declare more space, to touch subordinates and to act in a friendly way to superiors.

In spite of what a lot of books declare, you can't become a leader just by beginning to do all these things. Adopting a new type of nonverbal communication can work temporarily, but it won't work long term unless it signifies an authentic change in attitude. In particular, if you are being promoted within the company, where everyone will have the ability to compare your new signals to the way you behaved before the big promotion, the new you will be noted with scepticism.

What you can do is to make sure that, as you develop management abilities, your body language isn't weakening them, and that you aren't still imitating a fan. So check your nonverbal communication frequently against the above mentioned signals. If a few months into your promotion, you're still finding it difficult to speak readily, to go initially or to act confidently, these are signs that you aren't growing into your new role.

A word of alerting here for women. As part of their way of coping in life, women generally develop positive social skills. In specific, they smile and nad. But if overused, this type of nonverbal communication can suggest submission or placation, therefore weakening lady's authority, particularly if there are guys in the group. So, when first moving into a management position, it might be useful for you, as lady, to tone down and de highlight these signs, smiling seldom or nodding only when something truly meets your approval. It may seem hard-hearted, but it may also mean that you are taken a great deal more seriously.

ENCOURAGING THE GROUP

One of the essential abilities of leadership is motivating your staff to do a really good job and discouraging them from doing a bad one. You really need to learn to tell your staff when they are doing well or badly, and also to back up those messages with your nonverbal communication studies have shown that mixing positive words and negative non-verbal communication confuses and outrages, while blending negative words and positive nonverbal communication makes people think you're weak and can be easily controlled.

Appreciation or support, then, needs to be joined by real signs of approval: a smile, a nod, an enthusiastic intonation tone. If you are a natural toucher and so is your employee, then you can include occasional contact on shoulder or back, parts of the body that have no sexual ambiguity. As touch reaches the nerve centers faster and efficiently than either sight or noise, this will make the praise more significant and more encouraging

When it comes to reprimanding staff members, really angry nonverbal communication is practically never ever a great idea. First, it raises hackles and can produce long-term resentment. Second, if you're really mad, your agitated body state will override any ability to communicate coherently and effectively. In general, then, if you feel that unmistakable rise of energy that accompanies anger, take time out to turn away for a minute, take a few deep breaths and calm your body down. After that, an expressionless face will carry the clear message that you're displeased, as will a low voice with emphasis only on the vital words.

Simply sometimes, however, a short, sharp burst of inflammation can work wonders-particularly if you are a person who is normally even-tempered and supportive. Letting your voice arise and harden just slightly letting a frown appear and your gestures be faster and sharper can give a recalcitrant worker a tip of what your future displeasure may mean.

Job body language Any job, of any length-from a two-year fund-raising drive down to a Monday-morning meeting-- travels through certain stages, each identifiable by its own characteristic nonverbal communication. If you are aware of these signals, you can tell how each project is going, and what nonverbal interventions you need to make.

The first phase is preparation. This means more than just planning and preparing; it means accomplishing a pretty good group feeling and making sure that everyone enjoys and dedicated. The group may well be transferring to a slow rhythm as members slowly gear up to the job: there will be a lot of coffee-making, sitting, thinking and talking. Even with a group that has known each other for years, it needs to be apparent from the team's significantly coordinating nonverbal communication that connection is growing in preparation for the new project.

As leader, move and engage quietly with group members, using your non-verbal abilities to help them make contact with one another. You can also motivate group recognition through matching in most business groups, you won't be able to do this formally, though in groups such as theater businesses or sports groups, you can get people to sing, dance, exercise or do other activities together. You will know that things are working when you see individuals' nonverbal communication starting to integrate, if you do not let preparation run for a little bit longer, motivating the group to talk and share activities more totally. Do not push people on, try to get them moving prematurely or cut this stage brief people really need time to enter synchrony

The next, energizing phase is about action People will be feeling more vibrant. Their movement speed will increase-and, as it increases, they will get yet more energy. Voices will arise in pitch, volume and rate and, as issues come up. you might hear those same voices become irritated or mad. But the work will get done. At this moment you yourself should be energizing people. Let your voice and others' voices will follow; let your actions be more energetic and others will be too. Urge people on in a firm, clear voice. And don't worry about disagreements-they're a natural part of the process. What you need to do is keep people's energy up-and if it begins to flag. to get them moving around. If all works out, stay clear and don't interfere.

There'll come a point where you have reached your goal-be that the target reached in your fund raising drive or the decision made in your meeting. Then every team needs wind-down time, however brief. Here, they celebrate what they've done, begin tidying up and assess what's happened. People will in the beginning feel high, want to unwind and let their hair down-- you are going to observe arising voices and freer movement. After that, they are going to be silent and reflective, relaxing alone, just thinking, or with a couple of others, talking. For a brief job, expect an extra cup of coffee and just a few minutes of note-taking: for a big job, be prepared for a roaring night out and several weeks of filing.

At this point, when the end is in sight, ensure people do have a chance to celebrate, even if only briefly over lunch. Congratulate your group and after that let go, no longer advising them on but enabling them time to wind down. Let your non-verbal technique show that you are delighted and proud, and that they deserve time to relax. Just then can you begin again, preparing and energizing your group, as you begin the ball rolling once more.

Chapter 2: How to Read the Clues

While all body language is interesting, it's a really good idea to be informed to specific signals that are essential to notice. This chapter highlights crucial body regions and, within these, some vital signs, with some of the many different analyses you can make from each one.

It used to be thought that a particular body language signal meant only one thing, but the most recent research makes it clear that a non-verbal signal can mean any number of things, depending upon the context. To understand this, you first really need to check a person's whole body language-appearance, posture, gesture, expression, eye movement, touch patterns and physical functions. Then you really need to check an individual's background, their culture and upbringing to see if this affects the way they present themselves. Does their nonverbal communication show any customization,' signs that the person has adopted general signals to suit their own character. Finally, take a look at the situation in which you see any specific nonverbal communication sign, to verify the context in which it is happening and take a look at other people's responses and events before and after.

Irregular shoulders and upper body

The level of a person's shoulders is even and stabilized almost all the time. When the level is noticeably different and shoulders are tilted unevenly, then that is often a body movement signal of some kind of imbalance in what an individual is thinking. It's a residual sign of the signal humans use when shocked, and it shows they're trying to decide or consider the alternatives: a shifting movement of the hands and arms, as though rather actually weighing the options.

Shoulder imbalance is a toned-down, subtle version of this weighing movement. A person's shoulder level will alternate, first one shoulder then the other fluctuating, or the person will give a slight wriggle, as though to shake off something across their upper back. Their head, too, may tilt in synchrony. These motions might accompany a person's own words about which decision to make-or might be carried out less clearly as they respond to the possibilities being outlined by another person. If the alternatives really aren't clear, and the person can't appear to decide, you might see them ultimately take up a position with just one shoulder raised-often with a reassuring hand supporting the tilted head-as they have a hard time to come to a conclusion.

Shoulder tension You can tell tense shoulders because they're partially raised, with the head diminishing just fractionally into the shoulders. This sign is a toned-down version of the ducking movement human entities use when actually frightened by something. flinching from a blow or a word, shoulders coming near meet the ears as if to block off any noise.

Shoulder stress like this can be a sign of many things. Combined with a broad, wary look, it shows you that a person is anxious about something that might happen here and now that they're actively watching and listening for the real-life issue to happen.

Alternatively, when somebody has a defocused gaze, it's more likely that they're worried about something more general in their life, instead of something that is pressing in the here-and-now, the defocused gaze shows that they're thinking about the problem, while the shoulder stress indicates their response to the train of idea. You'll see that some natural worriers have a consistently stressed out posture, which includes completely raised shoulders.

When they accompany a prevented gaze, a turn away or obstructing hand or arm, raised shoulders can also signal to you that a person wants to be left alone-as mentioned earlier, this is really the 'cold shoulder. And, obviously, if somebody continually prefers solitude-in other words. they are a natural introvert-- then their natural posture will completely include those protective, off-putting shoulders.

Arms crossed Crossed arms are usually said to indicate a closed mind, but this interpretation is only one of many possible explanations. Admittedly, if you notice other signals of non-comprehension, such as a blank expression, a furrowed forehead or a small lean of the head, then arms folded across the body may well be a signal that a listener is not taking in what is going on.

Likewise, if a person's shoulders are tensely raised and there are minute headshakes, then there may well be underlying disagreement with the arms performing a blocking function, just as if to keep tips at bay. And if feelings escalate towards anger-shown by pursed lips, raised voice and lowered brow-then the crossed arms may tense and pull into the side of the body, with the hands automatically clenched into fists.

But folded arms can have other, much more harmless intentions. They can be a shield: women use this signal more than men, perhaps since they're protecting their boobs.

Equally, if it's cold, an individual will intuitively try to conserve heat by holding themselves around the middle-where the most crucial organs are located. And if leaning back in a chair for long periods, a person will typically cross their arms so as to unwind in a completely different position. In all these situations, you may, quite appropriately conclude that in simple fact they're not safeguarding themselves against anything or anybody and that crossed arms are not a negative signal.

Hand as a fist A hand that is honestly formed into a fist is a worldwide expression of aggression. Its meaning is obvious - 'I'm going to hit you ...'- and its origins are clear. Primates clench their fists to strike one another in play or anger and either back oft or square up for a battle if this gesture is made to them. It's generally accompanied by an angry or threatening expression, lowered eyebrows, a forward thrust of the lips and a skin color change as the body prepares yourself for action

Most grownups seldom use a clenched fist gesture to threaten violence seriously. What you may see them do, though, is to automatically clench their fists when they are mad or irritated. This 'slip of the hand,' particularly when words and facial expression are mild or placating, suggests somebody's real emotions about the circumstance, emotions that are too socially threatening to be revealed. Indeed, you might notice a person placing their other hand over the fist to hide it or 'hold down' the violent hand as if to stop acting.

An obvious clenched fist also has other meanings in certain cultures. On the one hand, in lots of European nations, a clenched fist at the end of a bent and upward jerking arm is an insult, an unrefined reference to the sexual act. in Japan, on the other hand, a fist punched lightly into an individual's stomach conveys the idea of suicidereflecting the clenching of the fist around the routine knife used in Japanese seppuku.

Hand to head

When somebody puts a hand to their head, they could be indicating certain things. If the head is resting heavily on the hand, the person's head and eyes are angled downward and their mouth sulks or turns down at the corners, you would be right to think that they are feeling dissatisfied or stressed out. The supporting hand functions as a comforter; its touch will also actually be calming the person, reducing their heart-rate and blood pressure, and reducing the adrenalin in their bloodstream. Any mild, helpful touch from oneself or from another trusted person will achieve this physiological pacifying: for people, when it comes to animals, a gentle touch reminds us of the security of childhood, and relaxes us down.

Similarly, the hand-to-head position can show psychological activity. It may signify concentration-- if the whole body posture is alert, with raised head and direct eye gaze that follows what is happening: here, the assistance of the hand helps a person really focus on what is going on around them. Hand to head may also be an indication that a person is sceptical or is having a mental discussion with themselves-- if it integrates with the sideways look and partially slanted head that comprises the gesture called the telephone position.'

Hand over mouth

Positioning the turn over the mouth is normally an indication that means the person is hiding something. This might be something actual and physical, in Western nations, at any rate, it is considered rude to belch or misstep with the mouth uncovered, or eat with the mouth open and the contents visible. So an individual will move their hand up to their mouth to suppress an exhausted yawn, or when they're eliminating pieces of food from between their teeth

In normal discussion, however, you may also see a person raise their hand to their mouth if they want to hide what they're saying or what they might say-- it's a normally feminine signal.

A hand lifted to the mouth midway through a sentence, plant large eyes and a minor flinch, usually means that the person has said something they didn't mean to and is now metaphorically wanting the words back into their mouth. A hand to mouth as someone carries on speaking, in addition to a reduced head and eyes and a mumbling voice, shows that the person feels they need to keep talking-maybe as it will seem suspicious if they do not- but does not really want you to hear or to believe what they're actually saying.

Head angled

In primate people, tilting the head was a way of hearing more clearly, allowing the ear to have freer access to noises that may signal approaching risk. The gesture is still a signal that someone is interested and involved and is an especially feminine signal. As always, you need to interpret the exact meaning of the movement in terms of other body signals. If somebody actually wants to hear more plainly, they will tend to lean forward and tilt their head slightly. If actual hearing is not the problem, but showing approval of a speaker is the aim, then you might see them stay quite still, smile slightly and nod or move in time with the speaker's words.

If an individual needs to know more, then they will integrate that head tilt with 2 apparently inconsistent signals-a frown and a smile-to show that they're confused or

Impressum

Verlag: BookRix GmbH & Co. KG

Tag der Veröffentlichung: 20.01.2020
ISBN: 978-3-7487-2691-3

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