Chapter 1

How many times was I going to listen to girls giggle and fawn over me? Honestly, it was getting rather annoying, and these girls already knew that I was dating someone: Myra. She was the only girl for me and nothing anyone said could change that. She was cute, beautiful, and sexy all at the same time. I could talk about her all day if I wanted. I mean, her only flaw was her obsession with her looks…and having control over people. But, she was really cool once you looked passed that.

The only problem I had with everything was that every single guy seemed to go after her, even though they knew that she was with me, the captain of the football and soccer teams. It was pissing me off, but I couldn’t start anything, especially when I was looking at sports scholarships.

Myra and I were heading to class when some guy approached her with a bouquet of roses. Did he not see me at all? I scowled at him and she giggled at me, placing a kiss on my cheek. “I have every reason to be annoyed.”

“Don’t be, babe.” She looked at the admirer. “Sorry, man, but I’m not interested.”

“Yeah, so beat it, bub.”

“Scott.”

“Myra, you know I get jealous. I’d rather voice my opinions instead of showing them.”

“I understand.” Her eyes trailed off to a person who I recognized to be an acquaintance of hers. I only recognized her by her hair, which looked to be multicoloured. Myra always went to her just to see if she could tutor her. But, that was what I was here for. “I’ll meet you in class. ‘Kay babe?”

 “Yup.” I watched her skip towards the girl and continued to class. A lot of girls would take this opportunity to approach me, but I would just ignore them. I entered the classroom and sat down at my desk. As soon as I was able to relax, I felt a firm slap on my shoulder and I turned to find David, a good friend of mine.

“Did another guy attempt to steal your girl?”

“Yeah.”

“Why don’t you just make it known?”

“And start drama? Hell no.”

“It’s better than sitting on the sidelines.”

“Dave, I know Myra won’t fall for any of those idiots. I trust her.”

“Dude, I know you do, but I think you should seriously reevaluate your relationship with her. Actually, better yet, her. She’s not all that she says.”

“Not this again.”

“I’m serious, Scott. I get that you love her and shit, but have you ever thought about how other people actually see her?”

“Nobody really thinks she’s all that bad.”

“Are you listening to yourself right now? I have one prime example: Indigo.”

I blinked at him. “What does a colour have to do with this?”

“Not a colour, a girl.”

“Who the hell names their child Indigo?”

“Hey, I think it’s pretty cool. Anyway, Myra always targets her because she was never…a part of this school. She’s real quiet and a loner. The only reason why I noticed her is because of Myra. She likes to make her feel like shit because she just might be prettier than her, especially with that body.”

“What kind of body does she have?”

“Kind of plus-sized, super curvy. It’s fucking hot actually.”

“You’re a pig. And Myra doesn’t do that.”

“If you don’t believe me, then fine, but don’t come crying to me when you find out that she isn’t your perfect little girlfriend.”

 

<><><> 

 

My eyes were trained on the smartboard, attempting to comprehend the math problem in front of me. I furrowed my brow as I noticed a mistake in my calculation and decided to restart. Myra was playing with her phone yet again, and I sighed. She never really liked to get her work done. No wonder she needed tutoring.

Once I finished the problem to my satisfaction, I heard someone walk up to the desk. I looked up to find one of the students that sat in the back. She was short and kind of plump, but not overly so. Her hair cascaded down her back in tamed multicoloured curls. I could never remember her name, but I always recognized her. Myra always went to her in the morning and they just talked about stuff. I didn’t know what really. I did always tried to fit the chick in somewhere, but couldn’t. She wasn’t a band geek as far as I could tell, and she wasn’t a nerd or a hipster. I just didn’t know. She just didn’t fit…anywhere. Nowhere…I almost smacked myself in the face when I realized who she was. She was the girl David was talking about. Indigo, was it?

Honestly, why would Myra pick on her? She’s nothing special, just another one of those loners that haven’t grown out of their scene phase. She did nothing to deserve anything ill on her, so there’s no way Myra would even waste a foul breath on her.

“Scotty, you okay?”

“Hm? Yeah.”

“You sure? You’ve been staring at that girl for a bit. You’re not planning on cheating on me, are you?”

“That’s a stupid question, of course not. David had this stupid thing about you. He said that you harass her.”

She chuckled. “He’s just upset that I rejected him and now he’s starting rumours about me. You know that I’m not like that.”

“I know. He’s just being an asshole.”

“Yeah.”

“Love you.”

“Love you, too.”

 

<><><> 

 

Friday at 7:37 pm: Dude

 

Friday at 7:37 pm: wht?

 

Friday at 7:38 pm: sry, man.

 

Friday at 7:38 pm: for?

 

Friday at 7:40 pm: talkin shit bout Myra

 

Friday at 7:41 pm: im still kinda pissed

 

Friday at 7:42 pm: ik. Hey r u gonna go 2 tht rave tonite?

 

Friday at 7:42 pm: nah, hw

 

Friday at 7:43 pm: it’s Friday u nerd

 

Friday at 7:44 pm: college man. Need the gud grades

 

Friday at 7:45 pm: but u need 2 relax. U deserve it

 

Friday at 7:45 pm: i don’t wanna go

 

Friday at 7:46 pm: but Onyx is gonna b there

 

Friday at 7:46 pm: Who?

 

Friday at 7:49 pm: omg u rly do liv under a rock! Onyx is a kickass musician & dj. Almost like skrillex, but hottr

 

Friday at 7:50 pm: no. not interested

 

Friday at 7:50 pm: srsly?

 

Friday at 7:50 pm: yup

 

Friday at 7:51 pm: U buzzkill

 

Friday at 7:51 pm: G2g

 

Friday at 7:52 pm: L8r

 

I felt guilty for lying to David. I knew who Onyx was, everyone knew. It was just…I didn’t want to go raving, especially when she was the deejay because people just went crazy over her. Everyone loved her music, but I didn’t. I just thought it was the same as dubstep and just flat out noise. And…I never knew who she really was. That was a deal-breaker for me.

I sighed and looked over my calculus homework. Onyx came from out of nowhere and now everyone loved her. She had her own CDs and merchandise that David owned, and I’m annoyed by it. I just thought that there was nothing to her “music”. And now because of her, I couldn’t concentrate on my damn homework!

I set my pencil down and got into bed. The rest of the homework could wait until tomorrow. At that moment, I was too tired to think.

Chapter 2

Today was hell. Honestly, how could a person go through several bad situations in one day? I dealt with stupid prissy bitches and other bullshit that just gave me a headache. I needed to escape, but I couldn’t just up and leave in the middle of the day. It went against what I stood for.

But, seriously…who the hell did she think she was, thinking that she could harass me like that? She was lucky that I was too nice to cause any bodily harm to her. I really didn’t understand how Scott could be with her. He’s so oblivious to what she actually does. I knew she had a history with half the soccer team as well as the basketball team. I seriously hated her.

I lied in bed thinking about what she said to me. She was way too paranoid. I wasn’t really interested in Scott, and did she really think he would actually be interested in me? I wasn’t his type. I was short, chubby, and a nobody. Did he even know that I exist? Probably not. Who really did? Anyone that actually noticed me were those from the football team, and they only noticed me because I was…thicker than most girls. They also believed that I had a big ass, which I didn’t believe. They were just being perverts.

I only had a few hours until I had to go to work, and doing nothing wasn’t gonna get me anywhere. I decided to do my chores like my parents had asked. Being the world-renowned doctors they were, they never had time for me. I did everything I could to get their attention, to get them to say something to me…to notice me. Hell, I dyed my hair in order to be reprimanded. Instead, they said it was a nice change and I was free to do whatever I pleased. It was because I wasn’t like the others…their little geniuses.

Four older siblings that they adored. My eldest sister, Alice, was an astrophysicist, and Matthew, my eldest brother, was a well-known mathematician. The next one, James, was an anthropologist. And Danica…she was a successful surgeon. And who was I? The outlier. I was a disgrace because I wasn’t as brilliant as they were, any of them.

My parents rarely called to check up on me. I was always alone. I wondered if they would care if I killed myself. I mean…I was half-way there with the number of scars I carried. I bet they wouldn’t even mourn for me. They would be sad, of course, but they would move on. They would most definitely care if it was one of the others. If I died, would they forget me?

 

<><><> 

 

My body pulsated to the beat. It was loud, yes, but damn, was it soothing. It was all I had. I watched as everyone moved to the sounds that I was producing, hypnotized by the odd melody. Those hanging by the walls found themselves being pulled in, becoming tangled in the trance. This was my safe haven. Up here with my mix tables, I controlled everything and everyone. My music told everyone how to dance, and I enjoyed this power. I pushed the limits and it was great.

I decided to kick things up a notch. As the music got heavier and crazier, everyone danced in anticipation and excitement. I was also getting ready for it. Getting ready to be rid of all my inhibitions. It was coming, I could feel it. Everyone could. Here it comes…

 

The bass drop.

 

All limitations disappeared. Bodies mixed together as the music completely took over. Even I danced along, becoming as hypnotic as my music. My body pulsed and swayed and my hair danced its own entrancing dance. Anyone watching me were taken by my movements, unable to look away. I loved that I had this effect on people. I ruled this place. I was the queen. And no one could do anything about it.

 

My zone.

 

Onyx.

 

Onyx.

 

Onyx.

 

 That was all I heard. My name being chanted like a spell. I was the revolution. No one could make anyone feel like shit here. All outcasts were welcome.

 

<><><> 

 

Breakfast was quiet. Mother and father read the paper as I picked at my food. It was rare for them to ever be here so early in the morning, let alone take a day off work. That was why it shocked me when I smelt sausage and pancakes when I woke up. They didn’t even call to tell me. And here we were having breakfast together, but they didn’t even bother to look at me, nor did they bother to strike up conversation. They knew I was never going to do it. That was until my father asked:

“So, Indigo, how is school going for you?”

“Fine.”

“Are you keeping your grades up?”

“Yes, father.”

“That’s good. We cannot have you tarnish this family’s perfect grade point average.”

“Of course. I make sure to focus on my schoolwork.”

“That’s good,” mother said. “Oh, your siblings plan to join us next week for Thanksgiving.”

That caught my attention. Us? “You’ll be here for break?”

“Oh, not the entire break. Just from Thanksgiving Day to that Saturday. It’s been so long since we’ve had the family together. I bet you had someone invite you for Thanksgiving last year.”

“Yes.” No. I was alone then. And on Christmas.

“Well, we’ll be a family again, and have fun, alright?”

“I can’t wait.” Yes, I can.  It wasn’t going to be fun. It was going to be dry, and I was going to be left out like always. I was going to be alone again.

The Saturday was odd and unpleasant. My parents were home, but they were still working. I just locked myself in my room and did whatever homework I had. Lunch was eaten in solitude, and dinner was the same as breakfast. Sunday, my parents left early, but not without leaving breakfast for me and a note.

 

Indigo,

We’re sorry that we could not take off for today, but we made breakfast for you. I hope you a lovely day and don’t forget to do your homework.

 

-Mother & Father

 

Of course they would say that. Couldn’t tarnish the family name.

 

I went through my usual routine, and the left for a walk. I watched as young parents and their children smiled and laughed. Siblings played and giggled, and included their younger ones, and I thought of my older siblings. They never included me in their games because I was deemed “not smart enough”. And once I was able to understand everything, they still wouldn’t let me play with them because I was inferior to them. Alice wouldn’t even let me near my own niece and nephew. The same with Matthew and his three sons. I was a disgrace.

I ran back home after seeing a particularly touching moment between a couple and their daughter. I locked myself in the bathroom. If I killed myself, would they truly care?

 

<><><> 

 

“Hey, fatass,” Myra sneered. I fucking hate her. How could anyone really want to be with her? How did Scott love her? He had to be a saint. I would’ve killed her already if I was in a relationship with her. “Fatass. I’m talking to you.”

“Yes?”

“Have you done my homework yet?”

“No.”

“What? Why not?”

“Because I have no reason to. And I was busy this weekend.”

“Like what? You don’t have a life.”

“Believe it or not, I do. I go to work, unlike you.”

“Yeah, right. Who would hire you? Your own family doesn’t want you.”

She was right. No one even cared for me. “I—”

“Save it. I better have it by lunch, or you’re gonna meet some friends who have been itching to get a hold of you.” She wouldn’t dare. She would let the football team get to me…would she?

“Fine.” I hated her. She hit a low point. I hated myself. I allowed this to happen. I was worthless.

I walked to class with an aching body and a damaged mind, but that was normal and no one seemed to care. I always looked like that. I really didn’t care, just as long as no one bothered me. I heard the constant whispered insults towards my physique. Everyone made sure to make it known to me that they were disgusted by it. They made sure to make me know that I didn’t belong in their world.

I sat in class, oblivious to the lesson, but listening at the same time. I needed to escape, and the lessons were the only things that could keep me from that other world where I often drift to. I felt eyes burning into me, I ignored them all. I didn’t want to face the pain again.

After class, I was approached by David, Scott’s best friend. However, I noticed that their friendship was becoming more and more strained by the day. I bet it was Myra again. How many friendships has she ruined? I looked up at him and he greeted me with a smile that almost charmed my heart. Almost. “Yes?”

“How you feeling? I saw Myra talking to you. She was being a bitch again, huh?”

I sighed and nodded. “I really don’t know why everyone hates me. I didn’t do anything. I guess my existence disgust everyone here too.”

He blinked at me. “Not everyone hates you. I don’t. Scott doesn’t either. Everyone’s just intimidated by you because you’re a junior taking college level courses. Hell, I’m scared of you. You’re too good to be here anyway.”

“I doubt it. I should disappear. No one would really care.”

“Don’t say that. Your family would.”

He didn’t know that. “I highly doubt that.”

“Why? Your parents love you. They would be an absolute wreck if you ‘disappeared’. I know I would.”

My parents didn’t love me. They have never once said that they loved me in my entire life. “Thanks, but I just don’t think so. I’ll see you another time, David.” I left him to think about what I just said.

I went to my second period of science: physics. That was what happened when you allowed your parents to choose your courses. I was happy enough to have orchestra and psychology as electives, but I had to persuade them to allow me to keep the more musical of the two courses. I enjoyed them both immensely, and I had peers that didn’t mind me so much, which was a refreshing change from my everyday life.

“Miss Campbell?”

I looked up at Dr. Barnes, my physics teacher. “Yes?”

“How is your family? Specifically, your eldest sister?”

“Oh.” Of course he would ask about her. “Alice is doing well.” I think. “I haven’t had contact with her for some time. She’s awfully busy.”

“I bet, being such a famous astrophysicist. Are you going to follow in her footsteps? You have the brains for it.” No, I didn’t. Not like her.

“Maybe. I may be a surgeon, actually. Following Danica.” No, she would have hated it. She even said I could never be like her.

“Ah, a great career choice. Well, carry on.”

“Yes, sir.” I’ll try now that I knew who you like in the family. Who was I to everyone? Was I really that intelligent? Did I really have that potential like my family?

 

No. I did not.

 

<><><> 

 

I lied in bed, cradling my wrist. It wasn’t deep enough. I would have to try again another time. I couldn’t bring myself to continue, so I put it down and laid there and waited for the bleeding to stop. It always did. But…I wish it didn’t.

Chapter 3

 Myra walked back to me after talking to Indigo. She looked a little too satisfied for my tastes, which made me wonder what it was that they actually talked about.

“Why do you always talk to her?”

“Who?”

“Indigo. Why do you always have to talk to her?”

“She gives great advice for projects and homework schedules. She also gives advice on how to deal with test anxiety.” Bullshit. Myra never has test anxiety. And her voice was too sweet, even for her. Why was she lying straight to my face? The idea of her lying to me made my blood boil.

Don’t tell me that David was right and she was harassing poor Indigo. “Oh, I see.”

“You okay, Scott? You look stressed.”

 “Yeah, I guess I am kind of stressed.” Because of you.

“Aww…maybe a nice massage after school will help you? How about it?”

Sex. Not in the mood. “No, it’s nothing too serious. I’ll be better by tomorrow.”

“You sure?”

No. “Positive. Alright, babe, I gotta get to class.”

“Okay.”

 

<><><> 

 

English was quite possibly the only class I enjoyed in my entire schedule. I loved the works that we got to read, like The Great Gatsby. But nothing beats poetry. Except for work that we had to do for it. We were looking at Robert Frost. I mean, I like Frost, but when we had to do projects for his poems, I despised it. My motivation to do something so tedious was almost non-existent. What was worse was being partnered with someone of the teacher’s choice. Mrs. Statia always paired me with some incompetent idiot who couldn’t make sense—or at least try to make sense of any of his poems.

For this particular project, she thought it would be okay to stray away from Frost and choose a poem. I was happy with that, but she was still picking our partners. I really hoped that I wasn’t going to be paired with Jackson. Anyone that couldn’t pronounce the word “conscience” shouldn’t be put within a foot of me.

As Mrs. Statia called out names, I looked around anticipating the person that I was doomed to work with. Then, I heard my name, and another that I didn’t expect. I was going to work with Indigo. At least I had someone who was smart. I turned to look at the junior and found her staring at me, but she turned away once we made eye contact.

“Scott?” I turned to my English teacher. “She’s really shy, so I want you to be patient with her. I paired her with you because you are the least likely to judge her too quickly. Her therapist said that she needs to be social and open up. No one in here can help her do that except for you, so please?"

“I gotcha.” I got up and approached Indigo, but as soon as I got within two feet of her, the poor girl started shaking. She really must have been anti-social to react like that. I didn’t think she would be this shy. “Hey, I’m Scott. I hope you don’t mind working with me.”

She just sat there, still shaking. I had to be patient or there would be problems. There was no way she was gonna say anything. That was until she opened her mouth. “I-I…don-don’t mind…” She was so quiet, I had to strain to hear her, but I still managed to pick up her response. I heard from her previous partners that she can go through an entire assignment without uttering a single word. She just did the work and said nothing. People got so annoyed by it that they’d request a group change, and she’s often working alone. It was pretty sad.

“Alright. So…what should we do?”

“O-Oh…m-maybe one of S-Shakespeare’s sonnets? I-I was th-thinking ‘Shall I compare Thee to a summer’s Day’? O-Oh, but it may be a little too sappy for you. Ah, ‘My Papa’s Waltz’ by Roethke? You can interpret it in many ways. I-I personally found it heartwarming. Maybe something by Neruda? O-Or Lord Byron? Emily Dickinson is good. Hmm…’The Torso’…oh, dear no! That one may be a little…risqué for this project. Ah, how about—oh, Christ…I’m rambling.”

Was she rambling? I had to admit, it was pretty cute. That was the first time I’ve ever seen her be so animated about anything. “I don’t mind. At least you’re talking. Hey, how about something with a grittier background to it?”

“Hmm…I like that idea. War poems are good. If we work on it, we could do something really cool with it. Maybe some type of visual interpretation? Ah, but I understand if that may be a little out there for you.”

“We’ll work that out later. First, the poem.”

“Okay. What do you suggest?”

“‘Le Déserteur’ by Boris Vian. It’s in French, but the meaning behind it is actually really good.”

“I know of the poem. It is very good. We can use that.”

“Cool. So…where do you wanna continue?”

“Wh-What?”

“Where are we gonna meet for the project? Your place or mine?”

“I don’t know if your place would be okay because of Myra, and my home is a little out of sorts at the moment. Not to mention that I may have visitors, but I doubt that they would remember to actually come by and--”

She stopped as soon as I placed a hand on her shoulder. I didn’t expect her to react by turning beet red. Maybe nobody ever touched her much. It was endearing, actually, to know that she’s simply very pure. “My place. If you’re worried about Myra, then I can deal with her.” I had to anyway. I needed to know what she has been doing to Indigo.

“O-Okay…okay.”

“Don’t worry about it. You’ll be fine, I promise. All you have to do is come over.”

“Oh…um…I don’t know where you live.”

“Yeah? Then, I’ll drive you. Today sound good?”

“Yes, it’s perfect.”

“Great.” At that, the bell rang and she got up with her things. “Oh, your fourth period?”

“Orchestra.”

“Alright, I’ll meet you there.” She nodded and I watched in awe at how quickly she was able to disappear in the crowd, becoming invisible to the eyes of the cruel society of this school. I turned back around to find David coming up to me with a knowing smile plastered on his face.

“Well?”

I sighed in defeat. “Alright, I admit she’s cute.”

“How cute?”

“Pretty cute.”

“‘Pretty cute’? Scott, Myra is nowhere to be found. I think you can be honest now.”

“Fine…she’s so cute that it should be a sin. How the hell is she single?” Did no one seriously ever think to ask her out? Was it because she wasn’t part of a major clique?

“I’m not sure, but I’m gonna change that. I’m gonna ask her out.”

I blinked at him. I wasn’t expecting that. “What?”

“I wanna ask her out. She’s easy pickings and super sweet. Not to mention that killer body. That’s something I wanna do all night long.”

I felt my eye twitch. He really was a pig. “Really? That’s why you want her? Just for sex?”

“And she’s sweet.”

“Wow, David, you’re an ass. She’s too good for you. She deserves someone who could make her feel better about herself, and you’re just gonna make her feel cheap. You’re no better than the rest of the football team.”

“Ouch. You’re that offended?”

“Yes, as a matter of fact, I am.”

“Then, do something about it.”

“What?”

“Act on it. Do something. You’re probably the only one that could get through to her.”

“What do you mean?”

“I think she’s suicidal.”

“David, don’t say stuff like that.”

“No, I’m being serious. I was talking with her yesterday after Myra harassed her again—which Indigo confirmed, by the way—and she got all depressed. She said some really messed up things like she should disappear and that nobody would care. I told her not to say that and that her family would miss her, and she completely shot that idea down. Dude, she wasn’t joking around with that. She was really contemplating it. And I’ve noticed that she had been wearing longer sleeves. She always wore short sleeves. They covered her hands, and don’t tell me that she was cold because the temperature hasn’t even dropped yet. I’m worried, Scott.”

“I’m sure it’s nothing.”

David scoffed at that. “Why does everyone say that? I know when a person’s thinking about throwing in the towel. My sister did it, Scott. Remember?” I remember. I wished I didn’t. “I just don’t want another person to do that, especially when I could’ve done something. Now, I want you to take care of her, and make sure she feels loved because I think that’s what she needs.”

“Dave, you know I can’t do that. Myra--” 

He snapped. “Fuck that whore! She’s been sleeping around behind your back!”

“What? No, she wouldn’t do that?”

“Oh, my god, Scott! How fucking stupid are you?! She would do that! She did that! She got half the soccer team—you can ask them—the entire basketball team, and she’s working on the football team! Why the hell do you think that guys keep asking her out?! I’m tired of you constantly siding with her even when you’ve noticed that she’s not who you think she is! Dump her!” He sighed, taking a moment to collect himself. “Myra isn’t worth your time or affection. Indigo is. Since you won’t let me date her, then you do it. Love her like you’ve never loved before because it may be the last time you ever will.”

It was my turn to sigh. “David, it’s not that easy.”

“Do it for Indigo. Think about her. If you date her, you could stop whatever bullshit is going on in her life. It doesn’t have to be right away, but start with today and getting to know her. Be slow about it.”

I growled. Him too, huh? “I know. Why do people think I’ll hurt her?”

“Because you’re her last hope.”

 

<><><> 

 

She was playing the cello when I found her. She looked so at peace and serene, it was too pretty for me to look away. I hope she didn’t mind me listening. Not so sure about the staring. It was astonishing how talented she was. She was in AP Physics and took AP Calculus with the rest of us. Not to mention her vast knowledge of English Literature. Even Statia didn’t know as much as she did. What was she playing? It sounded so familiar.

Once she ended, I clapped and she dropped her bow. Oops. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you. That was beautiful. I thought you played the violin. I never expected you to play cello.”

“O-Oh…thank you. I do play violin, but not often. I’m the first chair cellist for the orchestra.”

“I figured. What were you playing?”

“Cello Sonata No. 1 in E Minor, op. 38.”

“That was beautiful. I should hear you play more often.”

“Oh…well…I’ll allow it for you only.”

“Really? Wow, I feel honoured.”

She giggled at that, which made my heart tremble. What I would do to make her make that sound again. “I guess I should pack up and get ready.”

“Yeah.” I watched her do that and sighed. David was right. She was wearing longer sleeves. She didn’t even bother to roll them up to play her cello. She must be hiding something. Once she was ready, we set out to my car and drove to my place. I hoped Myra wasn’t there already, because I knew I wouldn’t be able to face her. Maybe Indigo knew about it. I could ask her. She wouldn’t lie about it…would she?

 

Chapter 4

 Scott's house was nice and comfortable, however, I didn't expect it to be so large, which made me feel even more inferior. My home was nothing to scoff at due to my parents' occupations, but it was nothing compared to this. He opened the door and led me inside to one of the sitting rooms, which was lavishly furnished, yet still held that simplistic charm.

"Make yourself at home. Mi casa e su casa."

"Th-Thank you."

"Do you want anything to eat? Or drink?"

"O-oh, I don't want to intrude."

He tsked at me and gestured for me to sit. "You're not intruding. Besides, I've got plenty of food that my mom and sisters won't eat because they're on a diet. You can have whatever they're not eating."

"Are you sure?"

"Positive. Tell you what, let me get you some snickerdoodles that my brother baked earlier. You can eat that. Do you want some water?"

"Yes, please."

"Alright." He hurried to thee kitchen and I waited patiently for him. As I did, I looked at the various pictures of a young Scott and his siblings, all laughing and smiling. Did we have any photos like that? I couldn't recall a time a where my entire family was happy. He came back with a plate of cookies and water and set them on the coffee table. "Go ahead and dig in. Don't worry about me, I'm not that hungry."

"Okay." I took a cookie and ate it slowly, and my eyes widened as a blush painted my face. These were...

"They're that good, huh?" Scott chuckled.

My face grew darker at his response. I nodded. "They're fantastic. I don't recall ever having snickerdoodles this good."

"Well, my brother would be happy to hear that."

"Um...forgive me for asking, but how many siblings do you have?"

"Six. I have an older brother, Leonard, two older twin sisters, Allison and Mikayla. Then, I have two younger brothers, Lucas and Mark. Last, is the baby of the house, Jessibelle. She's four years old."

"Aw, how precious. So, you're the middle child?"

"Yeah. It's rough, but I love them. How about you?"

"I have four older siblings, two brothers and two sisters."

"That sounds fun."

I looked down at my lap. It was never pleasant to talk about my family. "Not particularly." I didn't realise I said it until I was met with only silence. "I shouldn't have said anything."

"Hey, it's okay, you can tell me. Why not?"

I looked at him, my beginning to water. "Because...Because they don't love me."

He blinked. "That's ridiculous. Of course they love you."

"No, they don't. Ever since I was young, they had always treated me like I was not their child. I was the odd one out. I didn't hold the same talents as them, and they saw me as an outlier. The ugly duckling, so to speak. Everyone was a prodigy, but I wasn't. I didn't hold such a knack for science or math like they did. My parents surgeons. The eldest, Matthew, is a mathmatician. The second one, Alice, is an astrophysicist while the next one, James, is an anthropologist. Lastly, Danica...she decided to follow in my parents' footsteps and became a surgeon, and is as famous as them. And here I am. A complete waste of genetic material. I am nothing."

"You're not nothing."

"They have told me that I will never compare. I wasn't as smart as them, and I never will be. My parents forget me, and I'm always left alone. Always. It never helped that they always jabbed at my weight. I remember I was left at a store, and no one came back to get me. I walked home. Walked. Do you know what it's like for a seven-year-old to walk alone in the dark? And they didn't care."

"Indigo..."

"I try to please them, but they never noticed. It's come to trying to get their attention. I dyed my hair for them to yell at me, but they just brushed it aside. They have never once told me that they loved me, and--and--" I felt arms around me. They pulled me into a strong embrace. It was...warm, and sincere.

"Is that why you're hurting yourself?"

 My eyes widened. "H-How did you--"

"David noticed. Then I noticed. You're wearing long-sleeved shirts. You know, you're not a disgrace. You're probably one of the smartest people I've ever met. You're you. A fan-fucking-tastic human being, and nothing anyone ever says should make you think otherwise. I--"

"Scott, stop." Please stop. Don't force yourself.

"Stop what? Telling the truth? I don't think so. You're not alone anymore. I'm here now. I know I may not seem like much, but I'm willing to be the start."

"But...Myra..." She'll kill me.

"Apparently, she's been cheating on me." So he found out. "I wanna know if it's true. I bet she's threatened you about telling me, huh?"

He could see right through, couldn't he? "Yes."

"I thought so. Indigo, I want you to come to me from now on. I don't care about Myra right now. From now on, it's gonna be you that I give my undivided attention to. You and I are gonna spend time together. Alright?"

"But--"

"I'm not taking no for an answer." He was something else. No wonder he was so sought after. He was stubborn, too, but, he meant well. But...should I let him in? What if he used this against me? What if this was all a joke? I looked at him...and melted. He was almost as much of a mess as I was.

"A-Alright."

"Good. Now, let's get started on this poem, shall we?"

 

<><><>

 

After three hours of work, Scott drove me home. "I hope you're okay with this."

I nodded. "I am, just as long as you are."

"I am definitely okay with this. So...same time tomorrow?"

"...Y-Yes."

"Awesome." He pulled me in for a hug, prompting me to tense. "I know it's a lot to deal with...to take in, but bear with it, okay? Just know that you have people that care about you. Come to me when you feel lonely, or upset, or if you just wanna hang out. Yeah?"

"Yeah..." He was doing so much for me, and it was overwhelming. I sucked in a breath and he rubbed my back.

"I got you." I pulled away and smiled, and he chuckled at my bashfulness. Did I dare say he was enchanting? Yes, I did. Enough that I want to kiss him? Absolutely, but I held myself in check. He hadn't officially broke up with Myra and it was way too soon to start any romantic relations with him or anyone for that matter. 

I gathered myself and went inside to find no one home. Figures. I put my stuff away and decided to call it a night. But, I couldn't sleep. Not when the afternoon's events played through my mind. I practically spilled my guts to Scott and look where it got me. A potential ticket to getting attacked by the football team. If Myra found out--which she most certainly will--I'm not sure that Scott would be able to protect me. I knew he meant well, but what if it wasn't enough? I was already in enough trouble as it was with the amount of blood I lost in the past. I doubt he would be able to stop my only coping method that I had.

But, I had to try...for him. He planned to end a relationship with the most popular girl in school for the likes of me. It was the least I could do. How could I even begin to thank him? He was too good for me. His heart was made of gold. How could I go to him when the need arises? He was everything that could get him anything that he wanted: handsome, smart, athletic, a sweetheart to boot. He had smouldering eyes, a melting smile, a laugh that was music to my ears, and a face that entranced and frightened me. It was interesting. I couldn't describe the feeling he left in me.

"Scott, what are you doing to me?"

 

<><><>

 

Myra apprached me completely livid, accusing me of making Scott break up with her. She then accused me of telling him, which wasn't entirely true, but wasn't entirely false either. Then, she vowed to get revenge on me when I least expect it. I bet she was going to let her "friends" get a hold of me. I went to tell Scott and he pulled me to his side, refusing to let go, especially in front of watching eyes. He wanted everyone to know that no one was allowed to lay a finger on me. How did Myra ever manage to keep this wonderful creature?

David noticed walking together and decided I was in need of another "bodyguard", even though I was against it. This interesting predicament caught the attention of everyone, and I found myself attempting to recede into the depths of obscurity. However, Scott refused to let that happen and opted for a more daring choice: taking ahold of my hand and walking to class together.

"I could care less about what people say or thought of me. I'm more worried about you. I'm gonna protect you from the cruelty of everyone. Now, sit here with me. No more sitting in the back. Alright?"

"Okay." We sat and I instantly felt self-conscious. My god, I never thought that I would be sitting with the most desired guy in the school. I could practically feel the glares burning holes into me. Whispers of insults toward me reached my ears, but I chose to ignore them. However, Scott was having a difficult time doing the same thing. Before the lesson began, he turned towards the harassers and sent a death glare their way.

"Do you guys have a problem? Because I can't seem to see how our personal lives seem to be yours to talk about. Honestly, so what if I dumped Myra? It's not just because of Indigo. It's because she was a bitch that harassed her about her weight, which is actually perfect for her. You're just jealous because you can't compare to her. Now, how about you do us all a favour and shut the fuck up?" He turned and pressed his hand into mine, helping me release the breath that I didn't know I was holding. I didn't realise that he was so angry about it until I looked at him.

"You know, you didn't have to bother with me. I deal with stuff like this all the time."

"But, you shouldn't. I'm gonna put a stop to this. You deserve repect and I'm gonna make sure you get it. No  more bullshit from everyone, understand?"

"Yes."

"Good. Now, can I get a hug because I think I need one."

I blinked at him. He's oddly emotional, which made me worry. He was gonna sprout gray hairs at this rate. I pulled him in for an embrace, and I felt the tension he was holding dissipate. I squeezed for good measure and released him, a small smile present on my face, and I held his cheek. He returned my smile with a slightly larger and maybe a little sheepish one. I needed to make sure he didn't have to worry about me so much or it was gonna make stressed. He was way too sweet for this. I knew it was only a day, but I couldn't help myself. I was becoming infatuated with him. I was falling for Scott. This couldn't be good...could it?

 

<><><>

 

We were in his room this time. We were translating the poem and at the same time, analysing it. It was quite powerful, and I enjoyed it. Scott seemed to be taken by it as well.

"That last stanza always gets me. Jesus, it's fantastic."

"I agree. This soldier is telling you to shoot him because he doesn't want to fight in the war. That's quite a statement."

"Yeah." Before he could say anything more, he heard the front door unlock, and he swore under his breath.

"What's wrong?"

"My family's home."

I blinked. "D-Do they know I'm here?"

"Yeah, but they're gonna bug you about it. They love to embarass me."

I giggled. "Don't worry. I bet it'll be fine."

"Sorry."

"What for?"

"What they're gonna do to you."

Chapter 5

We decided to go downstairs to greet everyone, even though I knew better than to let Indigo encounter my family. My siblings were a pain in the ass, and so were my parents. So, there was a very logical reason as to why I groaned when Leonard asked if Indigo was my new girlfriend, which Lucas and Mark proceeded to tease me about. How did they already find out about Myra?

"Damn, you work fast," dad chuckled.

"Jesus, dad, no. This is Indigo. She's my partner for that project I told you about."

"As long as I don't see that two-timing slut around here, I'm good."

"Oh, but Indigo's awfully cute," Allison said, but Leonard beat her to the point.

"How do you feel about dating older men?"

"Oh, my god! Bye, all of you! Indigo, let's just go back up and work."

"Don't forget protection!" That came from Mikayla.

"Shut up!" I tugged her back upstairs and we sat in my room, processing everything that had just happened. I must have had the most embarrasing blush on my face, because next thing...Indigo was on the floor, laughing. Actually laughing. It must have been funny for her to watch me get so flustered, but I didn't find it the least bit amusing. So...why couldn't I keep myself from laughing along? Because it was so damn ridiculous not to. Once she calmed down, she sat back up, still smiling and giggling.

"I'm--I'm sorry, bu-but your face throughout the ordeal was priceless."

"I bet. I never was like that when they met Myra, but then again, they didn't like her."

"They only embarrass you when they like the person?"

"They're all a very good judge of character. But, the only reason why they dealt with her was because I was happy. I guess her parents told mine that I broke up with her, so yeah. But, since my family tried to pretty much ruin my life, they definitely like you and would probably bug me about you."

"Ah, Allison and Leonard..."

"Yeah...Ally's a lesbian. Sorry I didn't warn you about that. Or that she goes for sweet and quiet girls, so you're in danger. Leonard was actually being serious. He may try to court you. When he takes interest in something, he makes sure everyone knows it."

"Oh...Oh dear."

"Yeah. Sorry."

"No, it's fine. You have a colourful family. And they care about you. My parents hardly remember me, and my siblings never care to even call."

I swear if she's this lonely, she's gonna live with me. I couldn't bear to see her this depressed. Where was that smile I just saw?

 

<><><>

 

After much begging on my part, I convinced Indigo to stay for dinner, which my mom was delighted about because she was already fond of her small talk. Leonard and Allison still made advances towards her, which she cleverly shot down, earning my dad's favour all over again. But, I think she had a huge impact on Jessibelle, who wouldn't leave her alone after dinner. She might've become Indigo's favourite as well. She even managed to get her to loosen up around us. And everyone knows Jessi likes a person when she falls asleep in their arms. Indigo looked so at peace with her like that, adoring her like a mother would her own child. I thought she'd be like that.

"Please tell me she's gonna be my daughter-in-law," mom said.

"Mom, we're not even dating."

"But, you might as well be. I've seen the way you look at her. And I think she needs it. I know when a child is cutting. I'm surprised her parents don't know."

"Her parents...aren't around much. She's not really on good terms with her family, actually."

"I see...That's why she looked so sad earlier. Bring her over as much as possible. She needs a family, and I want us to be that family." Always a saint.

"Me too, mom. Just gotta keep Ally and Leo at bay."

"Oh yeah."

I watched as dad carried the youngest to bed and I approached her. "Let's get you home."

She looked a little disappointed but nodded all the same. "Okay." On the way to her place, I noticed her mood change. She was a little glum, completely different from earlier when she was happier. I guess it would be a good idea ot have her over more. Maybe for Thanksgiving? 

"Thanks for the ride."

"No problem. You know, you're more than welcome to come over. Jessi loves you, and my mom does, too. It's actually nice to have you around. And it seems like you like it there, too. Better than being alone."

"Yeah..."

"Listen, we're more than willing to be your family. We'll listen to you and we'll help you. My mom kinda figured out your problem, and she's more than willing to help. All you gotta do is say yes."

She nodded, her eyes watering. I pulled her in or a hug. "Thank you, so much. I don't know how to repay you."

I kissed the top of her head, surprising myself with the action. "You don't have to. But...if you want to...you better keep that cute smile on your face."

And there it was. That smile that had my heart going a million miles a minute. Was I falling hard? Maybe. And I couldn't find it within myself to care that I just broke up with Myra yesterday. I wanted to be with Indigo. But, I didn't want to scare her off. But, I was gonna work to make her mine. And make sure no one hurts her.

 

<><><>

 

English was rather pleasant. We had finished with the translation and analysis, and now we were trying to figure out the actual presentation. A powerpoint was too mainstream, so we decided to do something unique. I found out that Indigo was good at dance, so we could do a choreography in response to it. She could teach me, and it would be cool, but I doubt everyone would appreciate it. I didn't care, as long as we do well on it and get a good grade.

After class, Indigo left with a smile, and I waited for David to come up to me. His face was a mixture between knowing satisfaction and jealousy. "You managed to break through her walls. How the hell did you do that?"

"I was honest, and believe it or not, my family helped out. Especially Jessi."

"She met them? Including Allison? And she's still talking to you?"

"And she met Leonard. They both got a thing for her, and mom is already begging for her to be her daughter-in-law."

"Wow, already hearing the wedding bells."

"Yeah. They adore Indigo. And...I think I should make things official."

"You mean...actually asking her out on a date?"

"Yeah. I want her as my girlfriend."

"Perfect date: Onyx."

"No."

"Come on, it's awesome. I mean, it doesn't have to be just you two. I can come along as the third wheel."

"I'm not even sure if she likes Onyx."

"Everyone does. And the new music she's been making is kickass. It's completely different from her usual stuff, and everyone's eating it up. And she only performs on Fridays, so it's perfect. This rave is gonna be the best one yet."

"No, David."

"Just ask her about it. If she wants to go, then take her, and you'll both have the experience."

I groaned. There was no reasoning with him. "Fine. I better be impressed, or I'll kick your ass."

"I know."

 

<><><>

 

The choreography was simple and complex at the same time, and I couldn't help but feel a little foolish at my part. Indigo encouraged me and kept praising me, which made the entire thing worthwhile. I swear, she was too sweet for her own good. Then, there was the issue of my siblings. Allison and Leonard were too busy watching Indigo, but Mikayla, Lucas, and Mark made it their duty to make fun of me for everything, which earned a scolding from the junior.

"How would you like to try? Dance is not as easy as some make it seem, and since this one is for a poem, it is definitely going to be difficult. Scott is actually doing a good job for a beginner."

The three groaned and nodded, ceasing their antics. My mom laughed after hearing that, saying that she could use Indigo around here more often just for that. I agreed. After I finally got half of my part down, we took a break and I made use of it. "So, Indigo...I was wondering...would you like to go out on a date with me?" Smooth. But, it was more than enough to make her stumble ungracefully while she practised a bit of her dance, and gaped at me, the reddest blush I had seen on her yet painting her face.

"E-Excuse me?"

"Do you wanna go on a date with me?" The look on her face was too cute. She was so shocked and flabbergasted, it was too much. This couldn't have been the first time anyone asked her out.

"I...I don't know."

Kind of expected that. "How come?"

"No one has ever asked me out before. And I'm not sure how everyone would feel about a relationship between us. Myra is already after me, and the football team is trying to make sure that I don't show my face around school again. And your parents might disapprove."

"Indigo..." Her insecurities ran deep. But, how deep? "My parents have already accepted you. They like you, and they would love to have you around more often. And everyone at school thinks that we're together. Might as well make it official. Myra and those dicks, I'll handle them, but don't worry about them. So? How about it?"

She thought about it. "Where shall we go?"

She didn't say yes, but it was a start. "A rave. Onyx is supposed to be there."

"O-Onyx?"

Did she like her, too? "Yeah. Is that a problem?"

"I'm not entirely sure. I am one of her helpers, so I don't know if it would conflict. But, I'm alright with it. Just give me some time after she starts and we'll be able to meet up. Is that okay with you?"

"It's perfect."

"And maybe after, we can get something to eat."

"Sounds good." But, I'll have to listen to Onyx. But, Indigo will be there, so it's not all that bad. "So, Friday?"

"Yes."

She said yes. I got a date! I really hope I don't fuck it up and ruin the delicate relationship we already had.

 

<><><>

 

I came back after dropping her off and met with a knowing smile from my dad. "She really likes you. And you're head over heels for her, son. You better do a good job in keeping her smiling."

"Did everyone figure her out this quickly?"

"It's alright that you missed it at first. But, her happiness now makes up for it. I'm glad she's part of this family, and I hope you're gonna make it official someday."

"Why do you and mom keep saying that?"

"In due time, son. In due time."

My parents were never this cryptic. So, they knew something that I didn't, and they won't tell me. Whatever it was, it better be good and better be life-changing. But, what if it wasn't? Would I even be able to handle it? Because, I doubt I would, no matter what it was. Not when it involved Indigo. I might just break. I really didn't want it to hurt for me too. I wasn't strong enough for that.

Impressum

Tag der Veröffentlichung: 15.05.2016

Alle Rechte vorbehalten

Widmung:
To my loveliest friend, for your gorgeous and unique drawings always manage to give me inspiration for my writing.