REFLECTIONS
THE LITTLE GIRL’S SHORT STORIES

 

LINDA DYANNE BOLDEN

“Reflections” Tiara reflects on her life, revealing the traumatic and tragic incidents that occurred
In the “Little Girls” short stories…


TABLE OF CONTENT

Dedication page
Acknowledgement page

Chapter one
Trouble don’t last always

Chapter two
The day she met her husband
1. Her childhood Memories
2. The little girl’s bloody nose

Chapter Three
Dating Tyrone
3. Unmasking the secrets
4. The little girl’s best friend
5. The little girl’s allurement with boyfriend

Chapter Four
The day of her wedding
6. The little girl’s Magical day
7. Knuckle breaker
8. Boiling Water

Chapter Five
What bird can’t fly?

Chapter Six
The devil is a lie
9. The devil is a lie continues part one
10. The devil is a lie part two
11. The devil is a lie part three
Chapter Seven

12. The little girl visit to Mr. Shelton Store
13. Running Numbers


Chapter Seven
Her Husband‘s infidelity
14. The little girl’s cancel Party
15. The 3 W Monsters

Dedicated: To Leslie David Riddick

 

AN ANGEL IN THE MIDST

As I’m guided by your encouragement and your Wisdom
You reminded me someday we‘d be in Gods heavenly Kingdom.

I had some days of darkness and I was gloomy at Night
You reminded me of a day that we‘ll see a glorious Light.

As I travel life journey, anxious to reach the Distance
You reached out your hand, offering support and Assistance.

As I look toward the divine heaven above,
God sent you with some inspirational Love.

A true spirit that I’ve acknowledge to EXIST
My truly Loving ANGEL THAT’S IN THE MIDST...

Written By: Linda Dyanne Bolden

I also dedicate my first book to my Aunt Verna Dean Taylor who taught me about pride & integrity. To my uncle Charles Bozeman, a true man of God.


Acknowledgments

First and foremost I give honor and thanks to my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ for making it possible for me to complete my first book, without his blessings none of this would be in existence. I thank God for my two children, whom I am proud of, my daughter Telia Tianne Bolden, a recent graduated of East West University, with her Bachelor of Science Degree, the first in the family of her generation to obtain a Bachelor’s Degree. My son Tobias Bolden who loves his mom very much and is growing up into an environment that’s very grueling for the teenagers all over the world.

I thank God for my mother Annie Bolden, who reminded me that although we may stumble and fall along our way through life; yet she instill in me that with prayer, God is there to pick us up, landing us on our feet. Our beloved sister, Minister Faridah Love, who constantly reminds us each day that God, is good. I give thanks to my two sisters Mary Jones and Marjorie Bolden for their support during all of the days of my life, my other brothers and sister Barbara Bolden Richardson, Lavell Bolden, Earnest Bolden, Henry Bolden, Neal Bolden, and Willie Bolden. To my aunts and uncles for their support over the years, Jessie Andrews, Dessie Tillerson, Bobby Tillerson, Nora Rodgers, Geraldine Thomas, and Huey Jackson.

As I recently embarked on a new career at Rush University Medical Center, I would like to thank all my team in Transport Services for embracing me with a warm welcome, to Les Riddick, who taught me that “there is a true Director in all of us” Jacqueline Brewer, Debra Rouse, Stephenia Purnell, Muriell Nutall, Carlton Mc Quay, Efrain Villareal, Jill Washington, Phyllis, Irby, Caryn Robinson, and Pamela Ellis and to all of the transporters.

Thanks to my Girls, Debra Aldridge, Margaret Pitchford, and too little Mario Teague, who loves my little girls “Bloody Nose” and the “3W Monster Stories.” Thanks to all of the Food Services Staff at UCH for their support. To Annie Brown, Alice Williams, Louressa Montgomery, Alaina Entoe, Timika Nelson, (my cheerleader), Cynthia Jones, Carla James, my adopted niece, (be blessed) and Gloria Hughes, (lots of hugs). Florence Welch, who (encouraged the “little girl’s short stories”, To Catherine Ellis and Steven Ellis, who proclaimed “a year for a Change.” To UCH diet office staff that supported me and their enormous encouragements for the Little Girl’s Short Stories, Natalie Jones, Rose Arlington, Michelle Walton, Mary Montgomery, Gayle Alexander, Rosemary Burson, Tonita Harris, Shanell Watson, and Valerie Moore. I can’t forget about Rowena, the one person that reminded me that God always has “a ram in the bush.”

To my Pastor and my entire “Evening Star Family” who’s under the Leadership of Bishop Vesta L. Dixon, where “everybody is somebody”

To the Management Staff of Sodexo, who gave their support for my writings, Sandra Fleming, (my awesome cheerleader) Donna Anderson, (who I’m proud of for stepping up to the plate.) to Binta Leverette, (thanks for your encouragements and support) Erma Wilson, (a true Queen and a cheerful spirit), Mary Means, Mary Cannon, (my divine sister) Cedric Ivey, Jeffery Jasper, Grace Balogun, Gwenette Bush, and Yolonda Taylor.

Too all of my readers of “Reflections,” reflect on the idealism from the eyes of a black female perspective in the hood sharing life experiences through her Writings “The Little Girl’s Short Stories.”


Chapter one


Trouble don’t last always

Tiara Campbell was struggling all week to take care of her to do-list. She is a twenty- seven years old mother, with a two year old beautifully active little boy, recently separated from her husband after 4 years of marriage. She needed to take her son to the barber to get his hair cut, a task she dreaded because he never like the barber to cut his hair, crying and refusing to stay still. She was compelled to buy groceries because she was slowly running out of food to cook, declining on take out. She needed to drop off her dry cleaning and go to the bank.

Tiara was glad that she didn’t have to clean up her 2 bedroom town house or do laundry. During the weekday she refuse to let the laundry pile up on her so everyday when she came home from work, while she prepared dinner for herself and her son. She would multi-task her time at home with chores and her Insurance work, as an Insurance Broker Tiara always had some paper work to do. Sometimes she worked so hard obscuring into her work she barely had any time to feel miserable.

After the separation she lost any relevance to socializing with friends or family. She get up every morning to shower and dress herself and her son drop him off at her mom’s house and then travel to work. Fulfilling 9 or 10 hours days at work, pick up her son from her mom and go home, continuing the same routine daily. Whenever her loneliness and sadness set in, she drowned herself in tears. The heartache and pain from the anguish she felt after her husband’s indiscretion often left her feeling numb.

Time after time she questions herself, wondering what went wrong with her life, spiraling repetitively down this dark path. At night when she was unable to sleep she discovered herself reaching for a glass of wine or sleeping pills to go to sleep so she didn’t have to think so much about her despair.

At work her main focus was on the needs of her clients, not allowing any time to suppress her thoughts of her unsavory distressful marriage. At work she could transpire into whatever her exterior body or mind fabricated her into being. The well dress professional, with enormous pride and integrity, career oriented, well spoken, with zealousness and extreme determination. Divulging her exceptional beauty for all women of color; strutting her awesome tall slim figure for eyes to see, scrutinize with envy, dismissing her troubled mind, although her interior was throbbing with discontent.

At home she tries to heal her internal spirit,
working on that serene place, searching for the elation she knows she deserves. Everyday she strives on a new revelation, believing that God hasn’t absolutely forgotten her; and God in the end will see her through her heartache and adversities. By fulfilling the desires of her heart with that special man she’s been searching for her whole life, until 8 months ago she believed it was her husband Tyrone.

After she completed all of her chores that morning, by noon the sun was shinning so bright, and the weather was so pleasantly warm she decides to take Terry to the park to play. This was her week-end with Terry and she didn’t want to waste any opportunity to spend some quality time with him. Her husband wanted his son every other week-end. She never wanted Terry away from her for an entire week-end, but she agreed with his terms because she never wanted her son to grow up without his father in his life, she went through that emptiness, nonetheless she agreed and acknowledged her son needs dismissing her own egocentricity.

Tiara carefully pushed Terry in the swing watching his expressions and scenic smile; she thought how proud she was to be his mother, a precious gift she could have ever been blessed with, this little being shaped into a genetic copy of his father. His smile, lips, nose, skin color and his facial appearances were so uncannily like his father; Terry has his mother light brown eyes. She watched him laughed, while her mind mirrored on the day that Terry was born and how jubilant she felt when she first laid her eyes on him. Her heart skipped several beats; she couldn’t contain the joy in her heart, astonished that she could have such a healthy stunting baby boy, she was filled with enchantment, the tears formed in her eyes, caught up in the amazement that they could replicate someone so perfect. The day her son was born and the day of her wedding she felt cohesively complete.

After Tiara abandon her thoughts she took Terry out of the swing to let him run around the play ground area for awhile, constantly on his heel for fear that he would stumble and fall. Once she grabbed him up and put him on the horsy, mounded in the concrete, holding onto him firmly as she rocked him backward and forward. It was an enjoyable experience for him but he displayed some apprehension as she rocked the horsy.

By the time they made it back home they were both a little worn out. Tiara made them a quick meal, gave him a bath and put him down for the night. She smiled, happy about her decision to take him to the park. The time they had spent with each other was something they both needed. When Terry fell off to sleep she decided to run her a hot bubble bath filling it up to the top. She grabbed some of her tapes with all her old school jams, her jazz, staying clear of the blues tapes, since the blues music always made her feel sad and cry. She went to her cabinet reaching for a flute to pour herself a glass of red wine from the open bottle she had earlier in the week. She relinquished her thought of doing her paper work she need to have completed by Monday, shrugging her shoulders, indicating the work could wait until tomorrow after returning from Church.

The music and the hot bubble bath was breathtaking, she felt so relaxed, completely care free. She sips on her wine, while her mind became engulf in the music. She actually felt revitalized, not focusing on her loneliness, but all of the happier times, that God has bless her with, her son, her home, her family & friends, her job as an Insurance Broker and her health and strength. She came to a simple conclusion that trouble don’t last always.


CHAPTER TWO


The day she met her husband


During the week-end that Terry went to visit with his father Tiara decide she would start her journal reflecting on her life experiences. She was able to capture her thoughts, pain, and happy memories as well as her passion to reach the tranquility in her life. She has had this enthusiasm for writing since she was a little girl growing up on the South Side of Chicago. Even though she has anxieties about her son being away from her, yet she appreciated the prospects of liberating her thoughts on paper. Some valued time alone that every person need for themselves. All the same this time for Tiara was never wasted; it became a healing lesson for her. It was like looking at a picture from different angles. Sometimes one may not always see what they would like to see; but on the other hand she believes she could use it as a process in which every human being faces at one point or another in their lives. She know everyone will have some trials and tribulations, in spite of that one most believe and have faith that God will see them through it. She started writing about a particular day in her life. It was an extremely hot day in July; the humidity had been enormously suffocating. As she drove down Lake Shore Drive, it looked as if everyone was out and about on the beach. During her drive home from work she dreaded getting out of her car because of the beaming sun. She had to make a stop before going home to her apartment. The AC was a little helpful but getting in and out of car made her feel sweaty and sticky, which she couldn’t feel the full effect of her air conditioning.

When she made her exit she headed for the Walgreen’s in Hyde Park a couple of blocks from where she lived. As she drove into the parking lot of Walgreen’s, a tall man with Caramel color skin tone, about 6:2, very muscularly built, with the widest grin you could ever imagine, the most sensuous lips any woman would want to kiss forever, and oh so--so fine, wearing the hell-- out of his blue jean pants, a black sleeveless tee, black Jordan’s shoes, with sweat pouring from his forehead. He immediately caught her attention as she watches him pull his right leg over his Black Harley.

When he approached her she couldn’t help for staring into his eyes. She felt as if an electrical current went through her body. She fell into a daze as she imagine herself on the back of his Harley with the wind blowing in her hair, and the breeze against her face, as she wrap her arm securely around his waist and presses her face against his back, becoming intoxicated by his scent, and aroused by their body contact. Butterflies had formed within her stomach from the mere thought. He walked up and asked her a question in his baritone voice. “Do you have the time glorious?” She like to have melted right there in the parking lot. She looked at her wrist watch on her left arm “yes 7:33” she answered hazily as she quickly strutted away, entering into the store.

She couldn’t relieve her mind from her thoughts of him. She tried to concentrate on the items she had to purchase, but she was completely amazed how fascinated she became about this strange-hunk of a man. As she continued scrolling around the store lost in her thoughts; consequently buying much more than she had planned to buy.

When she left Walgreen’s her hands were weighed down from all of the bags she had in her hands. To her surprise he was still standing beside his motorcycle, (gulping down a bottle of Gatorade.) He walk toward her and said in a very sexy voice “you are too pretty to be carrying so many heavy bags, so let me help you.” She thought what a typical pick up line. He grabbed a few of her bags out of her hand before she could make a response. “I couldn’t leave here without introducing myself to you –by the way my name is Tyrone, but everyone calls me Tyi, so what is yours?” “Tiara and everyone calls me Tia,” she said smiling as she continued to walk toward her car. Her freshly done curls were blowing slightly from the occasional breeze in the air. She reached in her purse for her car keys as she unlocked her trunk.

Standing tall, 5:7 in height, with a smile on her face, wearing a navy blue knee length straight skirt, a white v-cut sleeveless shell, sheer stockings, and navy blue high heels; her bright skin tone was at an even glow from the sunset glazed against her face. Tiara couldn’t get over their instant attraction to one another. You’re a beautiful lady I have to ask for your number, I would like to call you sometime and maybe go out?” He boldly asked. She ignored his question continuing re-arranging the bags in the trunk. “Oh I see you are married or have a boyfriend-Huh!” He stated “No I am not married and I do not have a boyfriend.” “Any way’s I don’t know you and I don’t think I should be giving you my number”. She laughed at him. “Well a pretty lady like you should have a man.” Then he laughed. “Don’t worry yourself it’s my choice you know.”

She closed her trunk and proceeded around to the driver’s side of her car to get inside. Tyrone was on her trail not letting her off the hook, as she sat in her seat her skirt slightly rose above her thighs; his face was plastered on her, immediately she looked in her purse for a pen and close her car door, letting down the car window, she wrote her name and telephone number on a torn piece of paper out of her folder. She was slightly hesitating about giving him her number, but she couldn’t resist the chemistry between them and she was becoming infatuated. Quickly she drove off after he walked away heading toward his Harley.

She couldn’t wait to get into her home to three-way her girls, reporting her mystery man, but then she thought to herself, what was it to report, nothing other than he was good looking, as a matter of fact she really didn’t know anything about him. She relinquished her thought of calling because she knew her best friend from work, Candice Nelson, the drama queen among all drama queens, would have so much drama going on in her life, she would never get a word in edgewise.

Candice was tall about 5:9 inches tall, a smooth milk chocolate skin tone, very high maintenance, always at the nail shop for a pedicure or a manicure, wouldn’t wear anything but designer clothes. Long weaved hair, and always adamant on buying a size 10 outfit when she knew she needed a size 12, so of course all of her dresses and pants were hugging her big round butt, the proportion of her weight was her back side. She is a very pretty young lady overly applying her needless makeup and dressing very provocative.

Tiara loved her girlfriend Candace, though she always thought the diva was way over the top. Candice felt she was the prettiest lady walking, she thought all the women were jealous of her beauty and every man wanted her. Tiara also believed that every hard leg that came her way, she got with them. Naturally Candice would never admit she was shallow, anyhow Candice loved drama and she loved being in the mist of a lot of mess, and whenever she wasn’t she would some how seek out for it. Therefore Tiara knew if she call her now she would be on the phone with her until the wee hours of the night talking about some lady’s man that she was accuse of sleeping with and most likely she had slept with him. Basically she was not tolerating Candice to ruin her cheerful thoughts of Tyrone.

She also wanted to call one of her best friends since high school, Pamela Smith. Keep in mind Pam was the shortest of them she was about 5:5, of mocha tone, she was the afro-centric type, she kept her hair in braids, sometimes wrapped in decorate scarf’s, scarcely wearing dresses or skirts, mostly African attire. She’s a very attractive lady but not a girly girl one. Pam could play basketball and baseball better than the average guys in the hood and Tia has witness the girl kick a lot of butt back in the day. She guesses her having six brothers made all the difference. At any rate she decided not to call her either because Pam was her girl in all but her life style to her was border line insane, you see Pamela was bisexual, not that it was her place to judge, needless to say she worried about her relationships, jumping back and forth with a man for a few months and then to a lady for another few months.

Sometimes a person couldn’t keep up with who was her (roommate) as she calls them from one day to the next. Tiara always told her that it was not healthy or safe for a person to be jumping back & forth like that, in spite of this her response was “she couldn’t help it, if both men and women couldn’t get enough of her” Tia like always would throw her hands up and say “whatever.” As an alternative Tiara following her initial thought and she chose to take a long shower and polish off the leftovers in her fridge.

The next day when she came home from work she had several messages on the answering machine. Tiara had decided to leave work earlier that Friday, after two schedule meetings she had to attend. The temperature was still unpleasantly hot, so she immediately removed her clothes and took a shower. After her long shower she went to the answering machine and pushed the button to listen to her messages. Tyrone had left two messages the first one he said “hi Tia, I was calling to see what’s up with you, I will call back later” the second message “hey pretty lady I was wondering if we could hook up sometime during the week-end, I’ll call you back, or you can call me at my number 955-4299” she also had a message from Pamela, “What’s up girl don’t forget tomorrow is our girls night out, dinner ,and our Luther’s concert, so call me when you get in from work.” Tiara smiled at her messages, thinking about how frantic Tyrone was to take her out and her plans with her girls.

She went to her newly remodel kitchen, actually her entire apartment was newly remodeled, and she was proud she had decided to rent that apartment. She had recently moved in and was excited that she had her own space. She hadn’t dated in about year, ending that relationship on unpleasant circumstances, leaving a very bad taste in her mouth. She didn’t want to seem desperate, so she refused to return Tyrone call, instead she prepare her a nice salad and grilled a chicken breast to cut up in her salad, toasted slice garlic bread, and had a glass of grape pop with her meal. After she completed her meal she went into her bedroom to get her journal and headed back into her living room to start writing about her childhood memories.


Her childhood memories
The little girl’s short stories

Her earliest memories were basic on reflections of traumatic and tragic incidents during the course of her life. She remember when she was in the 4th grade, it was then that she realized that she was able to express herself better in writing, which at that time she said she wanted to become a writer , the desirer hasn’t changed. Writing was a form of escape for her. She had tried to block so many things from her mind but the more she wrote or read the more those demons came crashing down on her.

When she moved to Chicago she was only two years old, the age of her son Terry, so the south, she doesn’t have any memory of being there. She was told that her father was in jail at the time. If her memories serve her correctly her oldest sister explained to her that it was her aunts who told their mom in so many words that she could either come with them to Chicago or stay in Lake Village and continue letting their father beat the crap out of her. She was just a toddler, so she doesn’t have any memories of them fighting but her oldest sister and brother lived with that dreadfulness. Also she was told that her father cheated a lot.

Her mother was only 15 years old she was a child herself, when she got pregnant with her oldest brother. She was too young of bride and didn’t know very much about being a wife or a mother. Her grandfather was the preacher in the small town of Lake Village and her grandmother was a history teacher. Her Granny’s father was the son born to his mother’s master. That’s where the white line traveled in their family. He was born the year the slaves were freed in 1863. Her granny’s mother, his wife, was half Chippewa Indian/ half black.

She didn’t know ancestor’s on her father side because he was adopted. His adopted patents were well off and they adored her mom and her children and they would always threaten to cut her father off if he hit her mom. This saved her for a while, but after their death she didn’t have a chance to get away from his abuse. Any way’s as she had mentioned beforehand, in a small town like Lake Village the preacher’s daughter and the teacher’s daughter getting pregnant and unwedded was definite a no no, so her mother falsified her age in order to wed her father.

When she left Arkansas she had six children and was pregnant with the seventh child. Her mother was in her twenties and had nowhere to live in the big city. Her mother was the only one of her siblings that had a big family and of course, all of her sisters and brothers were divided up amongst relatives until her mom found an apartment big enough for them. She has no memory of the split ups when they first arrived, but she remember two times later when they were split up, she felt it was not pleasant to say the least. She recall the time when her little brother who was two years younger than she, and her baby sister, was playing with matches and set the apartment on fire. She was about six years old, and her baby sister had to be about 13 months. All of the other kids were in school except for the youngest two and her oldest sister, who was sick and stayed home for the day. Her mother was out, leaving her oldest to watch them. By the time she made it home from school the whole apartment was in complete ruin. Her mom had a lot of papers in her closet where the fire had apparently started. The firemen had tossed the sofa and loveseat out of the window in order to contain the fire. Nothing was saved and this is the reason they do not have any baby pictures today. Her oldest sister managed to get all of them out safely. She thanks God for that every time she remembers that horrifying day. She will never forget how terrified she was when she saw the fire trucks in front of the building and the destruction after the fire.

To this day she’s terrified of firers. She can take a funeral a lot better than a fire. Years later they had another fire in the building next to their apartment building, which had her scared to death. It was only smoke that they suffered. Her crazy brothers had the nerve to go back inside to retrieve some of their clothes. She always thought that was insane and didn’t care if they lost some of their things. When she thinks about things like that from time to time that terror still clings to her. Who in their right mind would value material things above their life?

The second time that they were split up was when her mother had to go into the hospital for a surgical procedure, she can’t recall, but she knew her sister told her later what it was. She never liked the separations because she could detect the tension of her relative’s houses at least that was her perception.
Her brothers and sister would fight like cats and dogs when they were kids but when it came down to it, they loved each other and always, always had each other backs. Her mother did the best she should with her kids and she always believed she was the strongest woman she has ever known.

As a young country lady coming into a big city like Chicago with six kids and one on the way, she had to learn fast and she truly did just that. She had four boys and as they approach their teen years and young adult years on the south side, of Chicago, where their neighborhood was infected by drugs and gangs were on the rise, during the early to mid 1960’s, in the year of 1963 and 1964, two Southside street gangs started to take form that eventually develop into two of the most powerful street organizations in Chicago. They were the Blackstone Rangers and the Black Disciples. During the control of these two organizations, the Blackstone Rangers were believed to be the most organized because they held national recognition, support from Blackstone Rangers prominent business men, entertainers, and politicians. Her mother had to step up and beat the living crap out of them from time to time because they were some hard headed boys. Yes she did use the extension cord on them butt naked and they all cried including her, but it paid off in the long run, they are all still here, managing to escape the gangs and some have suffered addictions; yet they are working on their recovery every day that God allows them to see it.

Her and her mother wasn’t the closes, even though she loved her and they are closer these days. She didn’t know her father well enough to form any relationship with him because she did not see him until she was 13 years old. Before they moved to Chicago she was too young to remember him. After he moved to Chicago they visited him sometimes or he would visited them but the only ties were the blood that flow through their veins. God says one should honor their fathers and mothers, all she can say about that statement is that during those time in her life she became to angry to love her father.


The little girl’s bloody nose
The little girl’s short stories

This day was one of her earliest memory as a little girl which was based on traumatic incident. This day entered her mind, the night before she was incredibly excited about going into kindergarten. She was five years old at the time. Her mother had bathed her and she put on her cotton pajamas that night. During the course of the night her nose had became very dry and she rubbed her nose over and over again tying to get an air passage. Throughout her sleep she must have pick into her nostrils because it started to bleed. At first it started as little droplets of blood, but it became heavier as she rubbed it with the sleeve of her pajama top. When she awakens out of her sleep she saw the blood all over her pajamas, immediately she jumped out of bed and ran into her mother’s bedroom. Her mother didn't look alarm when she told her mom that her nose was bleeding. She just took her daughter into the bathroom and she told her to lead over the sink. She wet a towel with cold water, washing the blood away. She also told her to press down on her nose for a while so the bleeding would stop. She quickly removed her bloody pajamas and brought in clean ones for her to put on. By the time they got back into her bedroom the bleeding had started over again.
This time it was not just droplets of blood it was like buckets of blood. She rushed her back into the bathroom while she lifted her up, holding on to her tightly, and she let the water fill completely up with cold water. She pressed the cold towels against her small face, going through one towel after another. Every towel she used was soaked in her blood and the cold water in the sink was filled with blood as well. She could see the panic in her mother’s eyes now since she was becoming very frightened. She couldn’t control a simple nose bleed, was beyond her belief. Her mother rushes her into the room and sits her child on the bed so she could start dressing herself. Before she could get her clothes on the little girl had vomit blood all over herself and in the bed. She had tears in her now and she remembered her mom grabbing her up from the bed with a blanket covering her and rushing out of the house with her child in her arms. She ran down the stairs and into the street where there were two policemen standing along side their patty wagon. She pleaded with them to take her to the hospital, her child was bleeding and she couldn't stop it.
She was admitted into the hospital right away, blood and a small child would most definitely get some immediately attention. Any way’s after the doctor’s examine her they ensured her mom that she would be fine and that it was not anything life threaten going on with her child. He told her to give the child plenty of fluids throughout the day and to make sure that her bedroom gets some moisture in it. The doctor said that it was the dry heat in such a small area tends to dry up the nostrils, which can causes bleeding if the child picks at it. He suggested that she either put in a humidifier for the bedroom or put a pan with water on top of the radiators to obtain moisture in the room. She told the doctor her daughter would be entering into kindergarten that day and his reply to her was “she should be fine.” That was the best news for her to hear, she could go to school for her first time. That was her first time being in the hospital, not the last time of course, and her first time riding in a patty wagon and guess what? It wasn’t her last!!
Before Tiara could complete her thoughts of her childhood memories in her journal the phone rang. She closed her journal and sat it on the end table beside her, then reached for the telephone. It was Tyrone on the other end. “Hi Tiara this is Tyrone did you get my messages I left earlier?” He asked. “Yes I did I just got in a little while ago.”(She lied) not wanting him to know that she was just as anxious to talk to him as he was to her. “So how are you doing?” she asked. “I ‘m fine just wanted to here your lovely voice and see if we could hook up sometime this week-end. I was thinking we could go out to dinner and a movie if you don’t have any plans.” “Well tomorrow is a bad time for me because my girls and I have made plans to go to dinner and then to a Luther Van dross’s concert. We can plan to go out another time.” “I hope it will be soon.” He interrupted her before she could respond. “I have been thinking about you every since I first saw you in the parking lot.” A smile appeared on her face as she listened to him talk in his sexy baritone voice, picturing him standing in the parking lot looking so sexy in his jeans, she always thought a suit and tie man was sexy, but she was entice by him and the way he looked in his jeans. “Huh… what did you say?’ she asked drifting in her first thoughts. “I said… where you work?” he bluntly stated “I work for United Insurance Company as an Insurance broker and you.” “I am a technician for Illinois Bell Telephone Company.” “So miss Tia, when came I take you out” he ask her changing the subject. “Maybe some time next week-end just call me later on in the week to confirm a date.” She responded not wanting to be too hasty on her decision to go out with him. “Okay” silence fell between lines and then he said “I will get back with you on Wednesday, I hope you don’t change your mind because I really want to get to know you Tiara.” “Okay Tyrone I will talk to you on Wednesday, bye.” “Have a good night sleep pretty lady.” Both lines went dead, Tiara put the phone in its cradle, as she leaned her head back against the sofa. She became enthused about the expectation of going out with Tyrone. She remembered she had to call her friend Pamela and she pick up the phone again to dial her number. One of Pam’s girlfriends answered the phone on the second ring and she asked to speak to Pam. “Hey girl I didn’t forget about our plans, you know I can’t wait.” “Who knows about you Tia, you can’t holla at your girl you’re always working so damn late everyday.” “That’s what I do- -work, anyways I will see you tomorrow about 4:30p.m. so don’t be late chick.” “You make sure you’re on time, bye.” Pamela said ending her conversation. Tiara thought she would get some rest and resume her writing about her earlier memories on another day.


CHAPTER THREE

DATING TYRONE
Tyrone definitely called on Wednesday to see if she would be free to go out on Friday or Saturday. She confirmed a date for Saturday with Tyrone. She wanted to look her best for him so she spend most of Friday evening preparing a special attire to wear, not deciding right way on the two dresses she pulled out of her closet. She knew the weather would be hot, so she wanted something cool and comfortable. Her stomach was doing flip flops from the mere thought of seeing him again and actually spending some time alone. It had been a long time since she dated. After her last relationship Tiara was very cautious about trusting her heart to another man, although she felt something magical with Tyi and she knew their courtship with one another would be pleasurable.

She was right about her and Tyrone, the first date and all the dates afterwards were great. They always enjoyed each others company and it was Tyrone who had insisted that she return to college to finish her degree in journalism. He told Tia if anyone that write as such as she does in her journal, then that person should become a writer, as usual Tia was writing in her journal as Tyrone sat in front of the TV watching his sports channel. Pam and Candice would recurrently tease her about all her time spent with Tyrone. Of course Pam most often than not was the one to say “you just kicked your girls to the side since you found you a man.” And Candice would say “you know!” “But I can’t blame her for that…with his fine self.” And all of them would laugh.

Some evenings Tyi would surprise her and stop by on his Harley and tell her that he wanted to take his lady for a nice long ride. She like the sound of that remark “his lady” and a ride on the Harley. When she first met him she fantasized about riding on his bike and she enjoyed every minute with him. She had no ideal that she would fall for him so fast but every day that she was away from him, her thoughts were always about him. Tiara was hoping that he would continue being the sweet gentle man that he had been for the last few months they had been dating.

She was older now and the fairytale stuff she had as a little girl with Terrance Clay were way behind her. As she thought about Terrance, it brought back some of the memories of the fun days and the sorrows growing up. Her instant magnetism with Tyrone was in similarity to her little girl’s attraction to Terrance Clay. Tiara started writing about the painful days before writing about her fun days.

Unmasking the Secret
The little girl short stories

Her mother didn’t have anything but probably a few clothing for them when she took off for Chicago to start a new life with her children and her family. She had some help from her sisters and brothers. Still she became good friends with a lady, living in their building; she was a city woman of course and took her mother under her wings. She schooled her on using whatever she had going for her, in order to get whatever she needed and her mother was a very beautiful woman and she believed she used that to her advantage. They were definitely on public aid and Tiara didn’t care how much food stamp a family get it just doesn’t cut the mustard when you have a lot kids to raise. She spend a lot of time in bars on weekends but during the weekdays she was there ironing, coo Huh king and cleaning for her kids, whomever she may have met or got involved with she did not allow them around her children. She was a very proud, caring and respected mother in the neighborhood.

Everyone knew Mrs. Winters and some women were even envies of her. Her mother held it together and she was very proud of her courage to overcome those insurmountable odds that could break anyone’s spirit. Her reasons for saying this is because of what she did when her father became ill, after all of the heartache and pain she had endure with him during their marriage, she went to his apartment and brought him back into her home to take care of him, after he became too sick to take care of himself. He was alone; years before he had turned ill, he had accidentally killed his girl friend. However this is something the little girl question in her mind today? You see, he was an alcoholic; his liver was completely eaten up from the alcohol. He gave her mom a very hard time about getting alcohol for him and at some point she started watering it down. Tia thought this was so funny but she did what she had to do. That was the spiritual side of her. Her kids thought she was crazy for taking him back in but she explain to them that she was more of a wife to him then than she had ever been. Go figure huh! Anyways she guess this was her way of saying to them, to death do us apart. So you see branches don’t fall far from the tree. She may have been the only one of her children that truly understood. You forgive and you move on.

Now since she got that out of the way she must begin talking about the anger and the bitterness that she had developed as she approach her teenage years. She was angry that her father was not there helping her mother with her children causing her to be on welfare for most of their up- bring. She was bitter because she had too many kids and she felt for a long time cheated out of the love and attention that she believed she deserved. She had assumed she was just being a little too selfish, that was perhaps the little girl in her. Eventually she saw that her mother had enough love to spread around to all of them, it’s just hard for her to see that when she had some many siblings in one house whole. To say the least she could never complain about being alone.
Anyway her deepest anger was focus towards herself, because she became ashamed and humiliated at herself for allowing what had happen to happen to her and never saying anything about it to stop it. She blames herself more than she blamed her brother for molesting her. She never told anyone in her family about the molestation. She became amazed how the mind works on her at times. She felt that she would try her best to put those painful memories aside, finding it creeping right back up haunting her once more. She would literally avoid going to the bathroom at times when she was at home in fear that her brother would follow her in there to take advantage of his little sister. He succeeded in doing just that every time he could and she did nothing about it but try as best as she could to stay far away from him as she could.
When she didn’t want to go outside to play with friends, she would go anyhow because she did not want to go into the house if she knew he was at home. She didn’t know how to tell her mother and she believed in her mind she didn’t care.

She was confused and too ashamed to confess anything at that point. Like most things in life you try to conceal it hoping that it would go away. That is one thing she has learned in life you can’t hide anything, it eventually come to a head. It can sometime cause destruction all around you when you hold unto things deeply buried inside of you.
You hear about these incidents all around you but sometimes you never believe that someone that your heart goes out to is yourself or someone close to you. She did eventually get to a crossroads in her life and she stopped blaming that little girl that she hated so much and the anger and bitterness subside and she was able to move on to forgive. She never hated him although sometimes in the past she wanted him to suffer, yet God has changed her life.


The little girl’s best Friend
The little girl short stories


She remembered some of her happier days as a little girl, she could never forget this time in her life because those were fun memories. Her best friend was name Marcella Jackson, although everyone called her Sis, the little girls nick name was Tia, they were always together back in those days. Every time you saw her, there was Sis. They were as thick as thieves, while they were growing up. She loved Sis to death and they did everything together. They were both about the same height and weight; they wore the same size shoes, and every time her mother gave her money and Sis parents gave her money they would always go to buy outfits alike. Sis was a year older than she, although she was a little bigger than her, but not much to notice. Some people thought they were actually Sisters. Their differences, were Sis hair was much longer and prettier than hers, and she was the most (Tia’s thoughts) prettiest girl that she knew. Tia, on the other hand was a shade or two lighter and she had beautiful light brown eyes that sparkler like the sunset.

They would always share their dreams of having the most beautiful wedding possible and having babies, neither of them wanted to have more than two or three children. Anyway they always wanted the fairytale stuff you know. Both would wish to meet their knight and shining armor, their prince charming. She is going down the memory lane, because it brought to her mind about the time when Sis had introduced her nephew to her. You see, Sis had two Sisters one was name Tina, her middle sister, and her older sister was Anna, who was married with three sons. They would come every summer to visit during the school break. Her husband was in the navy, and they lived where he was station at. However, she met her nephew one summer he visited along with his brothers and Tia fell in love with him at first sight.

His name was Terrance Clay Jr., the finest and smartest boy that she had ever met. He was nothing like the neighborhood boys; he was very nice, very proper, and polite. She always thought the boy had it going on and some. His complexion was of mocha tone. He always had his hair neat and cut low, she loved her some Terrance Clay. He was definitely his father, son. His father was handsome as well and if you looked at his father you could tell that Terrance would someday be his father’s replica. They both were fine and sometimes she sensed that his father was a little sweet on her mother. She could understand because his wife could never match her mother's beauty.

She was entering into the fourth grade when they first met. They got along very well together and it was an enjoyable summer. All of the kids played ball, rode bikes, played hide-go-seek, red light green light, catch the girl kiss the girl, playing in the parks, swimming, all of the kid stuff that they could think of.

Before she continue about her allurement with Terrance, she would like to continue her story about herself and Sis; her parents were a little overly protective of her, so most often than not, she was always at Sis apartment when they played. They were not keen on her outside or going places. They played with their dolls or they would listen to music doing their dance steps along with the music. Tia favorite songs were “Jimmy Mack” “I found love on a two way Street”, and Sis favorite Songs were “stop in the name of Love” When I was only seventeen”. The next year Tia, Sis and Cynthia, one of their other friends formed a singing group. They had talent shows in the backyard of Sis apartment building.

Like she said beforehand they did everything together and they always got alone very well. Sis mother gave birth to her when she was going through the changes of life, so of course they were old and sickly. She always would stare at them because she was so astonished to see such unattractive wrinkly parents with a beautiful girl. Tia had difficulties getting pass the age diffidence’s. Nonetheless she was sure they were good looking in their younger years.

After the summer break had ended she was back in school and daydreaming about Terrance everyday. She couldn’t wait to go to school and write about him during class time. She would take sheets of her notebook paper and fold it into halves, glue the paper together and make a little book out of it. This is when she started writing. She had a male teacher in the fourth grade so he didn’t case the girls as much as with the boys in class. It was then that she realized that all of her male teachers would be pushovers and she hit the nail on the head.
Nonetheless she would sit in class and write all of her fantasies about Terrance on paper. This was the most soothing experience she had ever, a place of calmness.

That became her time her space. She would write about their wedding, how big and beautiful it would be, prepared in whites, pastels coloring. She wrote fantasies of a beautiful home with all white walls, fine furnishings, and the honeymoon on the white sandy beaches on a tropical paradise island, with the radiances of the sunlight, basseting over their suntan skin. She in fact reached motherhood in her stories, the excitement of them being parents to twin girls. Terrance a Doctor, she is the wife of Dr. Terrance Clay Jr. The purity of those moments made her feel safe, an escape of what was to come. With every thought came another desire to see an additional summer break approach.

As the summer came and went the trouble started, yes they became older and more experimental. Sis and her started going to the back of yard fairs, fun town, and river view etc., however, Terrance and her started making out more, she somehow just (bam) developed over night. Her breast had a mind of their own it seem her breast were way ahead of her body and boy did Terrance notice, he and every other boy visible. Their hormones of course were becoming out of control and so were his hands. You see, he was now ready to hit the JACK POT!!! Her body was saying the same thing but she was not ready at all, although if she had been ready, he would have definitely been the one she chose to be her first. Besides she was in her early teens then and she was not about to have sex at the age of 13, not with him or no one else for that matter, so she fought him off of her and naturally he gave up and move on to another friend of theirs, someone who was willingly ready to give up her virginity, which was Cynthia.

You remember she mention that she had that same fight with her older brother trying to take what was hers and she continue fighting for her virginity until Tia was in her twenties.


The Little girl’s allurement with boyfriend
The little girl short stores

She continued her memories of her allurement with her and Terrance, the healthiest relationship of her past. Terrance had moved on and she was devastated from it but relieved all the same. She always thought in her mind that they would forever be girlfriend and boyfriend, yet he wanted much more in the relationship that she was unable to provide for him. You see, she had started having hang-ups about sex even then. She was already confused about her brother’s distorted behavior, believing that the male being was only looking to use females sexually. Because of his acts the little girl thought if she participates in sex, that God would punish her in the end. Yes, she fought off Terrance, because of his young mind and eagerness to get his feet wet, although her brother was somehow more determined to play on her innocence. He used deviousness, trickery and all other undermining behavior to fondle the little girl. She cried herself to sleep; she became a chromic nail biter, and unending bathing, trying to wash away the filth that developed within her skin. The compulsive behaviors begin for her at an early age of 10 years old.

He would often pretend he needed something out of the bathroom when she was in there and he would rub his large hardness between her tiny thighs until he would reach an orgasm, or he would pretend to take her for a ride in his car only to expose himself, asking her to touch his hardness stroking it until he’s at the peck of ejaculation, her eyes are close tight, as the smell of sex stings her nose, her mouth is very dry, her stomach is sick from dismay, she cries inside, it felt as if something was crawling under her skin, as her thoughts tried to search for that safe place, she pray for God to end her pain, her sadness, and her humiliation. So the little girl learned to not talk of it or think about it, she would whether suppress her humiliation believing that it would go away. However the sexual abuse eventually ended, although the little girl’s abusive relationship continue for her throughout her adulthood.

Anyway the little girl, she continued to dream her dreams to find that healthy relationship that she once had with Terrance, the purity and calmness, which would make her life complete; yet she became the victim of one bad relationship after another. This is how the little girl copes with all of this, through her writing this time in a poem.

So all her pain can go away

Each day she kneel down to pray
Hoping for a much brighter day
So all her pain can go away
She wondered why her path leads her this way
Can she turn her body into clay?
So all her pain can go away
Wishing that her life wasn’t at a disarray
She buries her fears and then seeks out to play
So all her pain can go away
Hoping to cast her burdens into the bay
What is this little girl frighten to say
So all her pain can go away
Hoping her secrets were not on display
But sooner or later she will have to relay
So all her pain can go away
Because she feels no one cares anyway
She’s ready to end her life of dismay
So all her pain can go away
Even though her hurt uncontrollably sway
As she hopes her dreams will manifest someday
So all her pain can go away

CHAPTER FOUR


The day of her wedding


Tiara felt inclusive the day that she was to be wedded to Tyrone Lee Campbell, she was overly joyful to be in love with a man that love her just as much as she love him. Becoming Mrs. Tiara Campbell was so overwhelming and she couldn’t stop the tears from falling from eyes. She had first met Tyi on July 10, 1981, at the age of 22, and they were married a year later on August 2, 1982. A day in her life she could in no way stop thinking about. Her sisters were her braids maid and Pamela was her maid of honor. Pam actually wore a peach gown with white peal earrings and a matching peal necklace that Candice had lend her, which looked astonishing on her, revealing her natural beauty. Her braids were pin up into a roll and the front draped into dangling curls, refusing to apply any makeup just an application of lip gross. Tia thought Pam looked absolutely flawless.

Tyrone chooses his best friend Rob as his best man and a few of his buddies were his groom’s men. They all looked stunning. Candice coordinated the wedding, which she was the perfect person suited to be the divine wedding planner. Candice chose a peach chiffon silk dress that was perfectly design for her marvelous shape. She kept it very simplified not to over shine the bride, nonetheless she looked astounding, and she did an exceptional job planning the wedding, in spite of Tia wanted a black & white wedding but Candice insisted that white & black was dull and dark, she told Tia she needed to add color to her special day, which they agreed on peach and white.

The bridegroom and groom’s men were wearing a Tuscany white tuxedos with white shirts, accents II peach vest and matching Windsor tie. The bride maids and maid of honor wore beautiful floor-length peach chiffon gowns. Tia and Candice had numerous of disagreements about her bridal gown but eventually they both decided on a beautiful off the shoulders white chiffon gown. The bodice of the gown was adorned with clear cut glass crystals with a matching wrap & purse and a crystal beaded edge veil. Her wedding bouquet was all peach roses.

The wedding was picturesque; everything was coordinated in white and peach with a little touch of gold trim something Candice was adamant on adding for sparkle. Tiara must admit everyone and everything looked absolutely magnificent. As her brother Steven walked her down the aisle she felt unique, a magical day in her life. Tears flowing from her eyes as she looked into the eyes of her future husband standing so proudly, looking incredibly handsome in his white tux, his hair and goatee was cut short, trim to perfection. His smile lit up the room expressing his happiness. Tears formed in his eyes as his lips fashioned into “I love you.”

Tiara’s heart was filled with joy as they exchanged their wedding vows to one another.


Tiara–the bride
My love
Your smile delights my world.
Your mystical eyes show great zeal
Your touch affects my soul.
Your voice brightens my day.
Your compassion is so gratifying.
Your faith magnifies my strength
Your convictions deliberates my fears
Your opinions grasp my attention
Your love intensifies my joy.
Your spirit enhances my existence
Your persona cultivates my love.


Tyrone-the groom
My love 2
My love will diminish your loneliness,
My love will keep you fascinated,
My love will fulfill your days with pleasantness.
My love will have your mind captivated.
My love will erase all of your doubtfulness,
My love will keep us from becoming separated,
My love will reveal feelings of thoughtfulness.
My love will keep our interest from being deflated.
My love will satisfy you with joy and happiness.


Both wedding and the reception were held in a banquet hall. His mother and father along with her mother were seated at the wedding party table. Tyi was the only child and he had a lot of aunts and uncles, along with cousins attending the ceremony. Naturally Tia had a host of relatives and friends to celebrate her union with Tyi.

After the reception Tyrone and Tiara went back to her apartment, they were both in agreement that her apartment was bigger than his so he had moved his things into her apartment the week-end before the wedding. They decided since they had an early flight out the next day traveling on their honeymoon to the beautiful Kauai Islands in Hawaii for seven days of paradise; it would be best to spend their evening at the apartment instead of a hotel suite, in order to lower their budget. His parents had paid for their trip as a wedding gift to Hawaii, which was helpful and indeed lavishly arranged for them.

Tyi parents rented for them a honeymoon cottage on the Kauai Islands in Hawaii. The Hawaii Honeymoon vacation package began with an unlimited mileage convertible car rental from Hertz, waiting for their arrival at Kauai. They were just a short drive away from the sunny Poipu Beach, Kauai’s most prestigious and private vacation destination with no buildings higher than a coconut palm tree and they had cool tropical drinks to welcome them to paradise, with the accommodations of Kauai’s beaches, pools, spas, and a wide array of ocean activities. They marvel at a tropical sunset every evening right from their private lanai.

Their footprints were the only ones on the white sandy beach and they explored an enchanted landscaped mountains caressed with fragrant breezes and dined beside a torch lit garden before they strolled under twinkling stars. The honeymoon was incredible and every night Tyi made Tia feel exceptionally loved, with his ever so sweet & gentle love making. Tyrone took Tia places sexual that she had never gone before, and her love for him intensifies each and every day, believing that fairytales will come true. Her wedding day and honeymoon were a magical time for her as an adult, and Tia revisited her magical day as a little girl as she put her thoughts of that day in her journal.


The Little Girls Magical Day
The little girl’s short stories

As Tia continued the little girl stories she would like to reflect back to a special time for her as a little girl, she was in the first grade. Her mom had dressed her up in a beautiful new black velvet dress trim with silky pink fabric. The back of the dress was tied into a big bow. She wore pink lace socks and black Patton leather shoes. Her mother had pressed and curled her hair. She was so excited to go to school on that day because the school was having a special school assembly. She was seven years old. Her teacher directed her classmates and her into the assembly hall to the front row seats in the mid-section of the hall. She sat three seats down the front row.

The lights were dim and the vice principal came on the stage to introduce the great magician.
He started his magical act with the bird being drawling from his long black top hat. He later showed more tricks as they viewed the hat as being empty, then he magically pulled a long scarf from the hat and the more he pulled the longer it became. All the kids were laughing and enchanted by his magic. He approached center stage with bright lights shining on him, to announce for his next act, a volunteer from the audience to assist him with his next performance. He pointed right at the little girl in the front row wearing the black and pink dress. She couldn’t believe that he was pointing at her to take the stage. She was a little apprehensive at first but she continued on anyway. He told her to sit in the folded chair and hold out her hands.

The magician pulled out hand cuffs from his pockets and proceeded to cuff it onto her hands, securely locking both of the handcuffs in place. Before she could blink the cuffs were back in his hands. A lady came on the stage from the back, one of his assistant’s with a black trunk. The girl thought to herself please don’t bring out the bird again; you see the little girl was not frightened of the magical tricks but she was indeed frightened of the bird. So the lady opened the trunk and the trunk had a board laying horizontal across the trunk. He told her to lie down on the board; she hesitated for a moment out of fear but lays down anyway. The magician pulled down the top of the trunk and the little girl head peeked out of the little round hole securing her neck.

He pulled on something and then reopened the trunk revealing nothing on the inside of the trunk. She could hear the audience in rhythm saying OOH!! Of course nothing was seen but her head. Had she been beheaded by this man? He closed the trunk and reopened it again and her body was attached again. Then he pulled out a watch and told the suddenly frighten little girl to follow it. She became sleepy as she struggled to follow his big round watch. When she had awakened everyone was telling her how she was floating in mid-air on the board. She vaguely remember moving around in the air so gently like an angel in a black velvet dress, and that magical moment kept her wondering to this day was she pick because of that beautiful black dress that she wore on that day. Her days in the third grade were a little more disturbing to say the least.


The Knuckle Breaker
The little girl short stories


She had entered the third grade; her teacher was an old wrinkly little lady. She can't remember the teacher's name but she remembers how mean she had been towards her throughout the school year. She will never forget this grade because the little old lady didn't had any mercy for her, or her classmates. Talk about cruel and unlawful punishment this would be the witch she had as a teacher. The teacher had three 12 inch rulers taped together, which was to punish the entire class if they act out or gave her any lip. Back in the day, whatever method the teachers chose to use for punishment was acceptable by the school board.

You could hit a kid in class and no one would stop you from doing so. Any way’s the little girl on numerous occasions was the victim of her abuse, primarily it was the little girls fault, because she had a very smart mouth. Even when she wasn’t being flip-lipped her teacher would blame her anyhow and tell her to get the Knuckle breaker (the three 12 inch rulers taped together) off her desk and whack her knuckles with it all the time in front her classmates. She had an instant dislike for this teacher from the moment that she entered into her classroom.

The cruelest punishment of all was when she caught someone talking or disrupting her class more than once during class period, she would make the kid sit under her desk for the remainder of the day.

The little girl remember those times all so well, it was a lot of days, she would be forced to go under her desk and sit there in the dark until class was over. The kids would laugh at her, she would cry and mumble curse words under her breath. The worst torture of all was when the old witch of a teacher would take a seat at the desk and the little girl had to, not only be forced in the darkness, but she also had to smell the staleness of her body odor. She got blamed so many times for things she did not do; however, she became sick of it, went home one day and told her mom what the teacher would do to her. Yes, her mother, of course made a visit the very next day.

Her teacher gave such a bad report on her; consequently her mother ensured the teacher if she ever have any more trouble out of her child, she would personally come back to the school and whip her right there in front of the entire class. After hearing her mom’s comments the little girl dreaded ever having to contribute to her mother's actual threats to visit the classroom again, she immediately became closed mouth, well behaved until she entered into another grade. She learned quickly to listen and learned. Her teacher stated continually to them, if you guys don’t learn this now you will never be able to learn it later on in life. They were the last classmates her teacher taught she retired after that year. The little girls next two years in school went very smoothly.


Boiling Water
The little girls short stories

It was a little cold in the house and her sister asked her to boil her some water for coffee, in order to take the chill away. So she went into the kitchen and put on a pot of water on the burner. She had become distracted by something that she was doing at the time and forgot that the water was still boiling. When she looked up and saw that the pot was at an extreme boiling point. She instantly turned the burner off.

Remember she said that it was cold in the house; nevertheless she didn’t see a towel within her reach, so naturally she grab hold of the handle of the pot with the hem of her sweater she was wearing, still not focusing on what she was doing but trying to hurry along anyway. As she reached for the pot to lift it up off the burner with her sweater, the heat escaped through the fabric, and the pot somehow slipped from her grip. She was only 11 years old at the time. The pot hit the floor and the scorching water, landed on top of her right foot scalding her, instantaneously turning into a blister. She screamed out so loud you could‘ve heard her from a block away. Her aunt Nina, her mother’s sister was staying with them at the time, her mom, her aunt Nina, and her sister ran to her aid right away to help her take off of her soaked socks, without breaking any skin. Boy did she feel like her skin was being torn from its flesh.

The burning in her foot was torrid. She was crying so hard, her mother couldn’t concentrate on what to apply to the burn. She grabbed some burn cream from the medicine cabinet, but her aunt intervened, she said that baking soda would be best for the burning. Her right foot had turned a red color. As she fell off to sleep the burning had subsided, and throughout the night, she had forgotten that she had been burn to such degree.

Anyhow the next morning she had a huge blister on her foot. Her mother told her that she could not go to school because she would not be able to put a sock on. Her mother said that later she would drain the blister and wrap it with bandages. However she never got the opportunity to do what she had plan to do, because her brother accidentally step on her foot, while he was playing with his cars in the house. She yelled out in pain again, the blister had been busted, which the pain had become unbearable. The blister was very dark in color, but after her brother stepped on her foot, you could see her flesh.
Her mom took her to Cook County Hospital, which was a long ride from where they lived. They were sent up to the burn unit, and the smell of the medicine and burnt flesh instantly made her sick to the stomach. After a long wait, the nurse came out and usher them to a room. The doctor came in shortly after, he introduce himself and then pulled up a stool for her to rest her foot on. He examines the burn, which he reported that it was very infected.

He told the nurse to put some warm water in a plastic bowl with some form of cleaning solution. He placed her foot in it and with a white sterilized towel he washed her foot, removing all of the burned skin away. The scar was completely white. He put some yellowish/green color cream on the burn and he wrapped her foot, moving up to her ankle with white bandages. He told her mother to take her down to another room where she should get crèches because he did not want her to walk on it or cover it with a sock or shoe. The nurse gave her mother an appointment slip for her to return, to have her dressings changed a week later.

She missed over a month out of school and that was torture for her. Her mother went to school to see her teacher Mr. Elle, explaining to him what had happen; he gave her home work assignments for her and told her mother to tell Tiara that he would miss her a lot and to get better. She was miserable sitting at home everyday, she actually missed her classmates and Mr. Elle, who was a gentleman at best; he referred to all the girls as Miss. So and so, which in her case was Miss. Winters and she like that a lot. Now for the boys he would just address them as their last names.

Some of the students thought that Mr. Elle name was very suitable for his looks, she sort of agreed with the association with him and the eel, he had those fish-like eyes and a long pointy nose, he was very tall, dark skinned, very slim, extremely strong; yet he was a nice man all the same. One thing she could say about Mr. Elle he demanded order from the boys and would not allow them to disrespect any girls in his classroom. After her third grade teacher, the witch of the west, she felt very blessed to land two male teachers after leaving her third grade classroom. He always treated the girls like ladies and he was very hard on the boys.

One of the bad boys in their class would always try to challenge him, and one day he grabbed him up, slamming his entire body hard against the blackboard, which left a crack across it. Any way’s she had to go to the Cook County Hospital every week to get her bandages changed. She dreaded every appointment, the long ride there, the awful smell of medicines and wounded flesh, having the doctor cut off her bandages, snatching off the last layer with a piecing force, while she clinched in pain, then washing the scared foot with cleaning solution, to reapply more cream and bandages.

This procedure continue for over six weeks, however, before she was completely healed she was standing beside a radiator one day trying to warm up, she heard the steam coming on within the radiator, so she stood beside it to get heat. She didn’t realize that someone had removed the cap from the radiator, as the steam reach its peck the steam gusted out, lo and behold it hit her right thigh burning her once again; consequently she had to get treated for her right foot and her right thigh at the same time. Good thing the doctor wasn't of the suspicious nature because he probably would have reported her mother to D.C.F.S.

Nonetheless, she eventually made it back to school, just in time for her to join Mr. Elle’s fifth grade class trip. He planned for the class to accompany him to the Orchestra Hall, located at the Chicago Symphony Center, on a Thursday evening, wearing their best attire, very honored to see an orchestral performance. This was a fascinating night for the 11 years old classmates.


CHAPTER FIVE

What bird can’t fly?

Pamela and Tiara were 18 years old when they were invited to their high school friends eighteenth birthday party, her name was Cathy Robinson, and after she graduated from high school she had became a mother of two kids, she was only sixteen years old when she had her first baby and two months before her eighteenth birthday she gave birth to another baby girl. She had moved out of her mother’s apartment and moved in with her 22 year old boyfriend who was the father of her second child. They were living in the Prairie Gardens Projects on the 6th floor of the building. However Cathy was a very sweet young lady, although very naive and everything someone told her she believed it.

She was very excite about her party and hounded Pam about coming to it. Tia was very uncomfortable about attending the party, however it wasn’t because of the fact she lived in the projects it was because of her boyfriends life style, he was dealing drugs and she did not like the way he treated Cathy. He was very disrespectful towards her and was a very unreliable person. Most often than not he was in and out of jail and it was Cathy who took her aide check to bail his sorry ass out of jail. Some days her kids didn’t have food because he would sell her stamps, then lie about it. He would lie around the house all day drinking and smoking weed right there in front of the babies.

Tia was dating this guy name Roy and he had introduced his friend to Pam and they all decided to check out Cathy party. When they arrived at the party it was a lot of females there and very few males, weed was being passed around from one person to another and the music was extremely loud. The reefer was so thick in the air you could get an instant contact without even smoking it. The few guys that Tia saw kept motioning each other to come to a back room where they were apparently doing cocaine. Beer cans and cups filled with alcoholic drinks were scatter all over the living room table.

After an hour had passed Roy and his friend Mike asked Tia and Pam if they wanted to leave the party. Of course Tia was game for that one. Roy was the driver and Mike and Pam were in the back seats of the car. Roy decided that he wanted to go to the beach on the Lake front. No one decline on his decision. They sat in the car talking to each other dates and occasionally kissing their dates. Tia thought Roy was a nice guy but she was not into him like she originally thought. Time passed them by and they did not notice that it was 11:30 p.m. when the police drove up into the parking lot.

A white male officer got out of his vehicle and tapped on the window seal on the driver’s side. “May I have your license and registration for this vehicle young man?” The officer asked. The black officer in the car was running the license plates on the car they were in. Roy reached in his pants pocket for his wallet to obtain his license out of it. “Is there a problem s—“Roy was asking the police but he cut him off and said “do you know that you are trespassing, this area is close after 11 O’clock.” Then he add “everyone step out of the vehicle.”
By the time everyone was out of the car the other officer approached them. He called both Roy and Mike over to him and told them to lean against the police car and he padded them down. Meanwhile the white officer was searching the car with his splash light. Then the black officer told Tia and Pam to come over to his car. He asked Tia to open her purse. Pam hardly ever carries one. He said that a female police office will be there shortly to search them. The white police officer came over to them and asked each one of them where they lived. Mike was the only one of them that said he lived over there nodding his head in nowhere in particular, which pissed off the black officer because he felt that Mike was being a smart ass.

Meanwhile, he hand cuffed the both of them and put them in the back seat of their vehicle and radio for back up to the area. The white officer went back to the car and opens the door on the passenger side. He opens the glove compartment and found a gun in it along with the registration. Roy told the officer that the gun belonged to his uncle and the car was also his uncle car. He said his uncle had a permit for the gun and it was registered. They did not hesitate to haul all of their butts into the station once the other police car drove up.

Tia, Mike and Pam were booked and charge with trespassing and Roy was charged with precession of a hand gun. Tia will never forget that night she was horrified and felt degraded all because they were parked in a space that had been closed after 11p.m. The black arresting officer kept reminding Pam and her about hanging out with two no good ass guys who wasn’t man enough to pay their bail for them to walk and he said that between the two of them punks they didn’t have two nickels to rub together for them to get out of there. He said they were two smart asses that they should never have been with. Tia remembers that she had about sixty-five dollars in her purse and she told Pam she would pay her bail. During those days a misdemeanor was set at $35 dollars for bail. Tia only had sixty-five dollars and she figure if Pam could get bailed out she could get more money from one of their brothers to bail her out without their mothers finding out about them being arrest. Pam refuse to leave Tia alone and she decided to try and call one of her brothers but she could not reach him. Obviously Tia had to break down and call her mom but the officer told her that her mother had to wait until tomorrow morning and she would have to bail them out at 11th & State Street because they were being transferred to that facility.

This was the time that Tia mention beforehand when she said that it was not her last time in a patty wagon because both her and Pam was taken in the patty wagon at 11th & state street to a top floor of the lock up for women. Both of them were trembling in their jeans. As soon as they walked inside the room, the desk was right there and the officer told them to take off all their jewelry and watches (which was not much) and remove the shoe stings from their shoes. Pam was wearing gym shoes but Tia had on sandals. Any way’s the room was exceptionally bright and hot, but it felt dark and cold. The officer guided them to a very narrow cell with two small wooden benches. The back concreted wall was filled with writing on it.

Next to their cell was a young lady that looked torn down from head to toe! She looked to be a street walker and/or strung out on drugs. Pam tried her best to be brave and unconcerned about her surroundings, but after the police officer closed and locked the iron bars you could see the fear in her eyes. Tia was glad that he closed the bars because the other lady bars were wide open. She assumed that he did it for their protection. For hours they kept their eyes wide open as they listen to the lady moaning in her cell, and having out burst’s. They both said to each other that they would never ever let anything like that happen to them again. Fear of freedom had taken them over.

Early the next morning Tia mother had taken a train down town to bail them out and all the way home she repeatedly said to them “what bird can’t fly?” “A jail bird!!” she answered for them. Tia felt it was a cruel thing to say and she felt that it wasn’t humorous at all. Of course all of their charges were drop and their case was dismissed because the two lying officer did not show up for court.

Three years later Pam passed the test and her training, she became a Correctional Officer at Department of Cook County Correctional Center. Tiara thought Pamela was crazy but she realized that Pamela felt if she ever had too face yet another jail cell it would be from the other side. Pamela became tight with a lot of people working for the county jail and she asked one of the managers’ working in the cafeteria of the Criminal Court Building to hire a friend of hers because she needed a job very badly. She promised Pamela she would do her best to hire Cathy. However she told Pamela that Cathy would have to take a drug test.

A week later Pamela called Cathy on a Monday and told her she was scheduled to interview on Thursday. Needless to say Cathy didn’t show up, Pam and Tia both were furious at her for not showing or calling to cancel. Pam wanted to go over to the apartment building and beat her down like she stole something, but instead Tia told her not to waste her time on Cathy, however, Tia called Cathy anyway to read her the riot act. She let her know that she was wrong for not showing up. She told her she would always proclaim that they had good jobs and she didn’t have money to do anything, constantly complaining about her not having any support for her children.

Tia told her she should get rid of her no good boyfriend who never works, always laying around smoking weed, selling her food stamps then lying about someone stealing the stamps out of the house. He lied to her about doing some hustling jobs, but most times he’s would be messing around with other ladies. Tiara told her she should stop dealing with losers that never have jobs and can’t get any child support from them at all. Cathy jump to his defense and accused her of being jealous that she had a man and she said that Tia always thought she was better than everybody. Tia shouted at Cathy telling her that she never thought that she was better, she just wanted do better and she didn’t want to keep making excuses not too. She always told Cathy that she should think about her kids and put their needs ahead of her own. Tia stated that it is her daughters who will suffer in the long run if the police raided the apartment and find drugs in it, and they would take her kids in a heart beat, becoming wards of the state, or they could end up drug addicts themselves if they didn’t see anything else in their surroundings.

When Tia told her this she became angry at her and slam the phone down, and after the blow-out Cathy didn’t speak to Tia again.

Pam found out months later that Cathy was snoring cocaine like crazy and that she had been doing cocaine for a long time. Three days after Cathy twenty-second birthday, she got hold to some bad drugs and had a heart attack and died. Leaving this world at an early age of 22 and leaving behind 3 children, age 6, 4, and 2 ½ girls, which caused a burden on her mother who had to step in and raise her children. Her boyfriend was in jail and had been for about a year. Tiara was so sadden by the tragedy, she cried, mourning her death for months. Naturally Tia couldn’t get pass the argument with Cathy, she was angry at herself for not making amends with her before her death; the guilt was eating away at her spirit. She never wanted her friend to assume she was being insensitive. She knew how it was to truly love someone, entrusting your heart in them, and each day that pass by, you watch them misuse it. The lost of her friend was a traumatic experience for her, she staring looking at life differently.

Cathy tragic death left a scaring on Tia, she miss her friend she wished that she had one more chance to hug her and let her know that she loved her and cared for her well being. She never wanted Cathy to believe that she only care about herself, which was not in her character. Tiara wanted all of her friends to do well and have a piece of mind and get the best that life had to offer. She also wanted her to see that even if they have been raised in the ghetto or on welfare doesn’t mean that they couldn’t turn their circumstances around. They didn’t have to stay on welfare or stay in the ghetto and they didn’t have to stay with men that will misuse them, just to say that they have a man that said he loves them. Tiara felt it wasn’t that serious, a person has to love oneself first of all.

After meditating on her death brought back distressing thoughts of her pass abusive relationship she had a year before she met her husband and the some other incidents in her childhood.


CHAPER SIX


The Devil is a Lie

Tiara strongly remembers when she was 21 years old; she had met this guy, who was a massager for the massager’s service for her company. His name was Charles Carter, an average looking guy. Dark skinned, with neatly trimmed side burns, dark brown eyes, about 5’11 in height. At any rate he was very nice to her; they always ate lunch together during her lunch hour. Their relationship took off to a good start. They went out to movies and sometimes occasionally dinner, but most of the time he would cook her dinner at his place because he was a very good cook and loved doing it. He would always share with her about his plans to be a chef and launch his own restaurant someday, which she encouraged him to do and she also told him that he should take some culinary classes in the evenings after work, but he never did, making excuses one after another. He was the first man she fell in loved with, even though, the relationship made a turn for the worst. Charles always had altercations with women. Something she did not see at the time, but she put two and two together later on as they became closer. She spent a lot of nights at his apartment.

As for the love making, that wasn’t much to write home about either, but of course, she was in love with him or at that time she believed she was, it was her first serious relationship with a man. After time pass they did less entertaining with each other or with anyone else, he was always complaining about going out. Nevertheless he constantly wanted to get high, smoking reefer (marijuana) as they called it in the 80’s and snorting cocaine. He started pressuring her for money to get high, which escalated into arguments.

One day he grabbed her in the streets pulling on her arm because she refused to give him money, she gave in that one time and he got what he wanted. Anything would offset an argument with him and when she refuses to argue with him and remain silent he would treat her like the agreement never happen. He was pretty much short tempered and saw that she had cared deeply about him. However silence was her ambition against him, although sometimes it didn’t work, he would verbally disrespect her more. Calling her stupid or silly, often he would call women stupid bitches, fat asses, all of those demeaning words. She had become feed up with his despicable behavior. Several people at work had told her that something was up with him, even Candice said that he was bad news and neither one of them liked the other, in fact Candice had said that Charles and her an argument before Tia had stared dating him, she just didn’t want to hear it or even believe it, blind by love.

His loathsome behavior had caused her to question herself, she was defending him to her friends, reminding them that he’s her man and he was nice underneath the temperament. Some of them insinuated that he may be gay. Now that was something to take in consideration. However she was slowly losing interest, becoming more depressed and dropping weight, nonetheless things didn’t get any better, much worst.

One day after work Charles and her were arguing about one of her friends. She didn’t want to draw attention to herself so she became quiet, trying to speed up ahead of him. They were on their way to his apartment when she steps out into the street. A car droved pass her and he grabbed her arm tightly, saying that she had almost gotten hit by the car. She was staring off in space, but she was positive about her seeing the car pass her. According to her knowledge of the whole incident the car was never that close to her, but he refuse to accept her stance, he started yelling at her calling her a stupid ass woman. She tried to ignore him but she couldn’t let it go. She told him that he didn’t know what the hell he was talking about and he was overreacting about something that never occurred. They went back and forward all the way into his apartment. He continue to nod his head and mumble under his breathe “we will see we will see.”
Before she could get her coat off, he haul off and slapped her so hard she landed on the floor. She will never forget this slap because she actually saw stars, and the sting had settled underneath her skin like an unforeseen print that will last a lifetime. She fought back her tears, hesitating to make any attempt to move from the floor. He walked away from her and went into the bathroom.

He had a studio apartment, so the walk was not far. As you walk into the apartment the kitchen area was in the entrance way. His living room area had a sofa, placed directly in front of the window, he had a small dining table with two chairs, alongside the sofa was two end tables on each side of it with lamps on top, sitting in front the sofa was his cocktail table. His bed was a built-in; it was placed against the wall where you could pull it out when you wanted to use it. He had worn out carpet on the floor. The bathroom was small with a toilet, sink and tub. The kitchen was small and narrow, a sink, stove and a little counter space occupied that area. Very little cabinetry, he had one closet in the whole entire studio.

After she notices that he was going into the bathroom, she immediately jumps to her feet, making her way to the bed. He was talking to her as if she was a child, but she tune him out trying to contemplate her next move, before she knew it she was dialing her home number and talking to her brother over the phone, giving him the location where she was and to come get her right away. He briefly heard her conversation on the phone and became angry as he approached her.


The Devil is a Lie continues Part 1


"I should bust your mother fucking head,” Charles was yelling in her ear as he approached her. He started pacing back and forth unable to control his temper or contain himself. The door buzzer rings, and it actually jolted her, from its loudness, apparently she had never heard it sound so loud before. She was also surprised about how quickly her brother had made it to her rescue. Charles did not move either did she, but she quickly stated to him and said "you better buzz him in; he will not leave here without me". It was seconds that passed, when her brother and his friend walked through the door. Her brother asked” is everything all right?” and she replied “yes I just want to go home”

She felt relieved as all three of them walked out of his apartment together with her coat across her arm. She eventually told her brother what had happen, which of course he wanted to retaliate, but she told him to let it go, although her brother indicated to her, she could have his gun for protection anytime she wanted it.

Several weeks had passed before she finally accepted Charles’s call. He apologized as usual and pleaded for her to forgive him, promising never to hit her again. The typical story along with I love you baby. She took him back, now was she still blind by love or blind by the fist?
Well to her surprised they did make it through a month without the arguments and fights. Now was she expecting him to change overnight? Perhaps, although everyone knows people just don’t change because you want them too, they have to want to change.

Even though she found out soon enough, they ended up arguing again about something she said she did not do and he said that she was lying about it. The argument became so heated and intense that it escalated to the point of him dragging her by her feet off his bed onto the floor. She was screaming from the top of her lungs “I don’t have to lie to you about shit Charles; you’re not my damn mom” “I’m your man you'll listen to whatever I tell you” he shouts back at her. With all of his might he lifted his right foot up and kick her several times in her left side, she slumps over slightly to ease the blows and grabbing at his foot to stop his constant kicking. She wasn't fast enough for him; however, he did stop dead in his tracks and pointed at her with his finger “you’re lucky I didn't bust your mother fucking head.” He walked away from her leaving her in the middle of the floor moaning in pain.

Moments later she moved off the floor and went to lie down on the sofa. He had made his way into the bathroom to shower and shave. This time around, he made sure he took the telephone inside of the bathroom with him.

At this point she was in too much pain to walk out of the door and never come back. She laid there in tears holding her side. He was still quiet after he came out and she only spoke to let him know that she needed to take a hot bath to soak her aching body. She gathered up her towels, gown, and her socks because she always slept in socks, her feet easily get cold and she quickly rushed into the bathroom to wait for the water to fill up completely. As she gets the water to her desired temperature she immediately steps in, inhaling and exhaling, she closed her eyes.

Charles is snoring, as she eased into the room all of the lights are out, except for one she left on in the bathroom. She moved slowly across the room to make it to the big closet located on the opposite wall of the kitchen area. She quickly reached for her purse, trying to subdue the pain in her left side, which was bruised badly. She frantically looked inside of it hoping she had the gun there. Excited she had it with her, she carefully walked over to the bed where Charles was sleeping soundly, and she pointed the gun directly to the back of his head, his face is facing the wall, closer to the side that he laid on. She fired once, as the sound of the bullet penetrated her ear, and then she fired the second shot, which became a droning sound in her eardrum.
His blood was everywhere, it stained the sheets, it was covered all over her gown and arms, and it spattered all over the walls.

She was never fully conscious of what she was doing, but she sigh… and released the gun from her grip, as it landed on the floor, she spins around on her feet completely, with her hands high above her head, moving her hands in a waving motion and like a chant “now whose head is busted… now whose head is busted… mother fucker!!” She’s laughing hysterically.


The devil is a lie continues part 2

She became sick at her stomach from the sight of the blood on her clothing. She curled up in a fetus-like position on the sofa, trying hard to block out the shooting. Her moans became intense and her breathing was heavy. She called out for her mommy as her mind slipped back to her past when the blood was all over her pajamas and running out of her month and nose. Her moans had taper off to sobs, as she reached out for her mother to embrace her in her arms, instead she was jolted by a sound, and she couldn’t concentrate, unable to open her tear-stained eyes.

It was a very loud pounding sound, followed by a huge hard thrust from the door; however she was unable to move from her position. She barely could hear the voices, uncertain to what they were saying, it sounds were like a whisper to her “this is the police” she manage to hear a man voice say. “Young lady are you okay? A lady voice said standing very close to her. She struggled to open her eyes to put together the face with the voice. The strange voice was a police woman gazing over her. The male officer was checking out the lifeless body on the bed. Her entire body was shaking endlessly, her stomach was nauseated from the scene in the room, and the tears couldn’t stop flowing weighty from her eyes. She said in a light murmur repeatedly “I did it… I did it.” The male office voice carried profoundly over the room “he is dead” she blocked out his remarks from her mind, quickly placing her head in her hands; the female office spoke and said “Ms. Do you understand me the neighbors reported gun shots in here and a loud argument between a man and a women!” “You understand?” she asked for conformation this time. She nodded that she understood her. “Is the man in the bed your husband or your boyfriend?” She asked with authority. She opened her mouth to respond but nothing would come out. She just nodded her head up and down.

The officer appeared to be sympathetic towards her, as she touch her shoulders and told her that she needed her to tell her where her shoes and coat was located because she had to take her into the station for questioning. She pointed to the only big closet in the entire apartment. The officer gave her shoes to her to slip on her feet, while she helped her into her coat.

The officer put the handcuffs on her hands, and she guided her out of the apartment, onto the streets and into the back seat of their police car. The street lights were on but it seemed very dark to her. As she sat in the car she saw through the window more police cars parked all other the streets with their sirens roaring and their lights flashing. The male and female officers that was in the apartment with her were talking with other officers about what they thought had apparently occurred.


After their short conversation they return to their vehicle and drove off. Her tears where replaced by fear in her eyes and she leaned back against the cushion of the car seat and closed her eyes tightly.

She visualized this magical radiance emerging, an image of someone strolling her way with his arms elongated, his clothing is translucent, his eyes gazing into hers, as he scope her, their lips are moist, overflowing with desire. His lip presses soothingly against hers, while their gentle touch discovers there way transversely down each others body. Her body is heated by the warmth and passion of both bodies gliding in rhythm. Her thoughts at that moment are breathtaking. Her heart skips a beat. His look is intense, while her eyes are glazing with aspiration, now she becomes mesmerized by his scent, she becomes overwhelmed as she hears a soft whisper saying “I love you and I need you.” The voice is incredibly transparent but the imageries are not tangible, however, the enthusiasm had her clinging on to the desire of his stroke, yearning to the point of thirst for his arms to be embrace around hers. The passion intensifies to its peak, then the radiance of that moment of Terrence diffuses right before her and she opens her eyes, she was left feeling perplexed and bewildered. Meanwhile all she could see was the police car light flashing, suddenly her body starts shivering persistently.


The devil is a lie continues part 3


As her eyes opens from the persisting shivering, she realized the water she was sitting in had became very cold. Her hands felt like they had drawled up into prunes. She had no ideal that she had drifted off into a dark place in her life where she did not want to be. The mere thoughts of her unconscious mind plotting, plus wanting to kill this man that she once love but now hated frighten her to the point of tears. Her body trembled again and she motion to sit up straight. As she reached both hands upon the side of the tub to get up, a razor-sharp pain went throughout her body reminding her of him kicking her in the side like she was some trash in the street, resulting in an ugly bruise.

She immediately sighs… with release, an indication that she had enough of his abuse. She rose from the tub and stepped out onto the floor. She grabs her towel to towel herself dry, still unnerved by her thoughts to shoot someone. She quickly released the stopper from the tub to drain the water and rushed over to sit down on the lid of the toilet seat. She was feeling light-headed her thoughts were becoming liberated now, after sitting in the tub for so long.

She still could not erase the events of the day, wishing that it was all a bad dream; however the realization of a man kicking a woman was something she knew she could not tolerate from anyone. She knew she did not deserved to be treated like that and she knew a woman should be treated like a queen by a man that says he loves her. Her day should have been a day of fanaticism and romance. She should have been taking a hot bubble bath, as he washed her back, not a bath to soak her aching body, or she could be sipping on a glass of wine, surrounded by a room of red roses, instead of dreaming of murder. She should have a day where both of them take turn rubbing each others bodies with scented oils, and listening to soft jazz play, eliminating the hostility and the physical abuse. The room should have been filled with laugher and romantic bliss, not replace with sadness and affliction. This is when she came to the realization that the devil is a lie and nobody was going to steal her joy or her sovereignty, Charles or no one else was worth going to jail for, neither was he worthy of her love. She was consciously aware of the fact she no longer would be a victim of any mans abuse; she had her dignity and pride to hold on to the day she die. She didn’t need him or his deranged behavior now was the time to walk away and end the madness before things became seriously out of control. Consequently she will walk away with a few bruises on her body and a life-time scaring but she will leave with a clear conscious and self-respect. This kind of relationship is an ongoing occurrence for women all over the world.

After bring into the light all of her thoughts and feelings, she was able to release all of the anxieties inside of her and concentrate on lotion herself down and putting on her gown and socks for bed. She click off the light in the bathroom and went straight to the bed, removing the covers back to get under it. He did not say anything to her and she did not say anything to him. He put his hand underneath her gown and she flinch, moving as far away from him as she could, she couldn’t believe that he had the audacity to touch her after just kicking the shit out of her, she was convince that he was a very twisted individual.

She couldn’t wait for the night to end so she could leave him this time for good. With that thought she drifted off to sleep.

The next morning she called off from work and she did not return until three days later, allowing her body to heal as well as her spirits. She called Charles to tell him that she no longer wanted to date him and their relationship was over. By the time she returned to work he had been terminated after an altercation with one of his clients. She was extremely relieved that she did not have to see him again, and she was extremely glad she could put that chapter of her life behind her.

After weeks of not talking or seeing him, he suddenly appeared inside of the insurance building one day, demanding that she give him so money, but she quickly refused his demands and he like always threaten to knock her upside her head if she did not give him what he wanted. She had become accustomed to his treats now and looked him straight into his eyes. “Well you just have to bust my head because I am not going to give you any money.” She said with confidents and she then added “but you just remember this would be the last head you bust I’m sure.” She didn’t know if he attain her alleged threats, nonetheless she was adamant about her statement and she never looked away from him. He looked at her and said “no I am not going to touch you, because I know you are plotting to get your brothers to come after me.” After his response he walked toward the door, walking out of it, mumbling “fuck you” and nodding his head. Indicating with the wave of her hand, “good riddance” She said out loud to herself. “Thank you Lord, This time, the devil is a lie.”


The Little girl’s trip to Mr. Shelton’s store
The little girls short stories

Dust had just set in; the little girl, however, had earned some extra money for washing the dishes and cleaning the kitchen, from her older brother. Any way’s she decided she would dash out to the store to buy herself some candy and a pop before it became too late. It was not daylight savings time so about 4:20p.m.

The daylight would fade away quickly. Since she had so many brothers and sister; her mom would give every sibling old enough, dish washing chores on rotating weeks. Her brother Steven never wanted to wash dishes and clean the kitchen on his time around. Nonetheless he would always ask her to do his time around with pay, and naturally it was no big deal for her and she could get paid in the process. She loved a well kept kitchen and she washed dishes with ease.
She quickly grabbed a light jacket and headed for the store to get some candy, she has always loved chocolate candy and grape pop was her favorite drink. During the late 60’s early 70’s you could purchase a 16 oz soda pop in a glass bottle for 45 cents and if you returned the bottle you could get 5 cents deposit back. As she walked out of her building onto the sidewalk she didn't see anyone outside at first, but as she focused her attention further toward Mr. Shelton’s store she notice a dark skinned male teenager walking around the circle wearing a gray jacket with a hood, blue jeans, and white sneakers.. She didn’t’ recognize him as a local. He seemed to be pacing the circle.

The circle was named the circle by the neighborhood kids; they played there during the daytime. They played soft ball or kick ball in that area. Also they would ride their bikes in the circle; as a matter of fact she was taught how to ride a bicycle in the circle. She remembers very well how she skinned her knees riding her bike in that particular spot. The circle was a big concrete pavement where Red's tavern, Mr. Shelton’ store, a storefront Church and a small dry cleaner was located.
At first she thought the teenager was going into the store, but he never moved, even after she made her way to it. She observed him closer and she knew then that she had never seen him before that day on her block. Of course she was alarm and was hoping he would not be standing there when she came out of the store. Nonetheless the little girl proceeded on inside of the store to make her purchase. Mr. Shelton put her purchase items in a brown paper bag, no plastic bags were giving to costumers during those days.

To her surprise the teenager had left from in front of the store, she immediately became relieved. She took a deep breath motioning to relax. The little girl felt something was wrong, she was 12 years old, she felt very suspicious, and uncomfortable, always being conscious of her surroundings; yet instill she started walking home, she looked up ahead and the teenager peered out from within the dark gangway between two apartment buildings. He had pulled his hooded over his head, blocking any visibility of his face. She knew it was him and panic set in again, knowing she would have to pass the guy to get to her building. Her thoughts were racing in her mind. Her original thought was he was up to something; yet she couldn't pin point what it was at that moment. She wondered if he was plotting to rob her or perhaps rape her. She anticipated the worst and she couldn’t figure out should she turn and run or keep walking hoping he was up to nothing.

At any rate as she continued walking, she slowed her pace, gripping the pop bottle tightly with her right hand. As she got even closer she notices that both of his hands were concealed in the pockets of his jacket. She knew subsequently she had made a mistake to continue walking in his direction. She was just hoping someone would come out or he would move from his location. However neither of her wishes was granted as she pace closer to the gangway. He stepped out near her, stretches one arm out to grab hold of her, but before his hand could touch her jacket, with all of her might she slung the pop bottle at him and ran around the gate locate on the left of her, running into the street. She ran as fast as she could, never looking back, until she reached the landing of her building, running up the second floor, she pounded hard on the door for someone to let her inside.

Her heart was racing as she took another deep breath anxiously telling her mother and her brothers what had just happen. Before she could finish her story, her brothers ran to the window to see if the teenager was still out there. One of her brothers sprinted down the stairs as the other brother followed behind him. Her mother was shouting in the background “just leave it alone y’all.” Just minutes had passed shortly after, they had returned with the teenager, pulling him by the hood of his Jacket. They actually brought him back for the little girl to identify him. As she looked at him she thought to herself that he had to have been mentally challenged to stay in the area after trying to commit such an act, as she was thinking this she really didn’t know what his intentions were, because she never gave him the opportunity to get near her. At first she felt a little sadden for him, she knew once she told her brothers he was the guy, he would be seriously beaten up. Her mother told them to leave the boy alone, however the little girl knew that was not going to happen.

She believed that her brothers got kicks off of thrashing the shit out of people. So her brothers took him outside but away from the building, beat him up very badly, they took his gun and all the money he had in his procession and gave ever penny of it to her. She told her brothers she did not want his money and gave it back to them. Any way’s after she found out that he had a gun she didn’t have any remorse for the teenager he got what he deserved for scaring the living hell out of her. At that moment she wanted to bring harm to him also with no guilt. The mere thought of a gun being pointed at her head was an adequate amount of justification for a beat down. She strongly felt that he should‘ve been reported and arrested for his crime. She nourished her thoughts of him suffering to the extent that he would think twice before doing this to another young person or any other human being. In her viewpoint he got off easy, which became one of many traumatic incidents that she wanted to put behind her.


Running the numbers
The little girl’s short stories

Remember Tia always mentioned about her and Sis doing everything together, on this day it was no exception. Sis mother had called them inside of her apartment. They were practicing their dance routines on the porch of the building. When they entered inside of the apartment she told Sis she needed her to go to Miss. Honey’s house so she could give her the money for her numbers. She wanted them to hurry up to place her number before it was too late. Sis understood the process much better than she did and she asked Tia if she would go with her to Ms. Honey’s house.
As they started off walking down the street towards Ms. Honeys house Tia asked Sis inquiries about the numbers game. She enlightens Tia about the illegalized gambling operation. She explains to her that a runner carries the betting slips between the betting parlors and the headquarters, and then the next day whether it’s three digits or four digits the numbers are randomly drawn the following day, being paid in full. It’s a cheap gambling racket. Tia was sure she had to find out this information from an adult because she had no idea that running numbers was illegal, Tia also knew that Sis mother was not the type to tell her 13 year old daughter about such an operation. She said that her mom places a bet on her numbers everyday and Ms. Honey was running the numbers.

She also confided in her about her mother and Ms. Honey had been close friends in the neighborhood for years. She also said that she over heard the conversation between her mom and another lady in the building about running numbers. In later years I learned that it was also called policy racket. This was like small time lottery placing bets on a number and getting fully paid. The gambler places his or her bet with a bookie at stores, taverns, and other private locations. The numbers were drawn from a daily total of the Win, Place and Show bets at a local race track, which read from top to bottom of the last dollar digit. Tia understood the racket much better later on down the years. The lottery replaces the numbers game after the government legalizing American Lotteries.

The girls didn’t have to walk far to Ms. Honey’s house it was on the next block, which was the only house that occupied that side of the street, the other dwelling were buildings. Ms. Honey’s house was all white exterior; she had a wired-silver-fence and a gate surrounding the front of the house. She had a few hedges in her yard. On the side of door was a round buzzer and on the door was a little peephole. When Sis reached out to press the buzzer, Tia, notice that the door was half open. No one responded to the door bell so Sis, call out “Ms. Honey… Ms. Honey this is Sis” They got no response again, so Sis pushed Tia ahead of her into the entranceway of house. Before they could take three steps forward they realized right away that something was wrong. Both of them knew that Ms. Honey had a dog and the dog was always with her. Her dog meant the world to her and they were aware that every dog would bark or run towards the door when someone comes towards it. Tia knew that was the reason Sis pushed her inside ahead of her, but both had become instantly curious about the quietness in the home. Ms. Honey had a big brown bull-dog; actually Tia thought that Ms. Honey and her bull-dog had to some extent the same features. She was a big round, brown skinned woman, with a wide pug nose, a mean brow and wore a honey blonde wig, that’s probably where the nick name honey came about. Any way’s the dog went everywhere with this woman like it was one her children of something.

However they proceeded to make more steps and still no one approached them. As they turned the corner leading towards the living room area, just outside of the hallway, they immediate stop dead in their tracks. Sis grab hold of Tia right arm and started pinching the top of her hand. Tia was not surprise by the pinching because she knew whenever Sis was frighten she would always pinch her, this was a frequent occurrence; which happen so often Tia remember back to those days when they were at the amusement parks, on roller coasters, Ferris wheels, or in hunted houses and she became frighten and pinch her; although unlike Sis, Tia always found the rides to be exhilarating, it was a rush for her, but this time Tia was shaking, frighten by the scene of the living room, they were both in shock and neither one could move at that moment.

Papers were scattered all over the living room carpet; the tan carpet was stained with blood, the dog was lying lifeless on the floor with a bullet hole inside its body. Ms. Honey was lying on the floor with a knife stuck in her abdomen area, her house dress was covered in her blood, one house shoe was on one foot, the other shoe was flipped up side down on the carpet and one knee was bent slightly. The cocktail table was flipped to the floor, and one of her lamps had falling onto the floor as well. Tia was engulfing in the entire panorama.

Tia hadn’t realized during the whole time standing motionlessly, Sis hadn’t stop pinching her and tears were running down her eyes. Before they knew it they were running back to Sis apartment with acceleration. Tia and Sis were out of breath by time they made it into the apartment. Sis was crying harder and she was incapable of getting out the catastrophe the girls had just discovered. Tia was holding her hand; her hands were shaking uncontrollably and her right hand was stinging from the pinching. Her stomach was doing cartwheels and she tried to make sense of what Sis was saying to her mother. Her mother could see that they were hysterical; therefore she told Sis and Tia to take a deep breathe and explain precisely what they had seen at Ms. Honeys house.

After they calm themselves down Sis proceeded telling her mother that both Ms. Honey and the dog were murdered. She became completely grief stricken, rushing to the telephone to call the police. After calling the police she told the girls to settle down and to remember to tell the police everything that they had seen in the house and to tell them if asked why they were at her house, that they were returning some money that her mother had borrowed. When Tia and Sis answered all the police questions Tia; instantaneously went home, trying to block out everything from her mind, but before the night was over her mother was watching a recapturing of the murder on the 7 O’clock news broadcast. Hearing and seeing that again brought revulsion back into her mind, causing her to have nightmares throughout the night.

During the police investigation, Tia heard numerous of people in the neighborhood whispering about who they thought may have allegedly killed Ms. Honey and her bull-dog. Folks were actually pointing a finger at her boyfriend. Whoever killed her made sure she was dead and could not identify the assassin because Tia later found out that Ms. Honey was not only stabbed, she had also been shot in the chest. Word was out that the police was looking for the boyfriend and he was nowhere to be found. Needless to say Tia on the other hand continued to suppress the incident, since this incident was more tragic than traumatic for the 12 years old to handle.


CHAPTER SEVEN


Her husband’s infidelity

This was the month of December, she had been married a little over 3 years, her son Terry haven’t became two years old yet, her husband Tyrone was staying out later more than usual. Some days she would be too tired from working, going to school, taking care of her son, cooking, and cleaning to really pin-point how late he would stay out. Most of the time during the week-days her mom would keep her son Terry so she did not have to bring him out in the cold at night, especially if she was scheduled for school on those days. However, Tyrone would tell her he was hanging out with his friends, having a drink or playing pool.

Tia dreaded the winter mostly when she have to travel in the bad weather to school in the evenings and she wonder why she never re-located to a much warmer climate to live. Chicago was known for the heavy wind and during the winter months one could definitely experience some trenchant winds or heavy snow storms. As she thinks about the snow and the cold weather she remembers the day of the big storm in Chicago and the day she was attack by the 3 W monsters.


The little girl’s canceled party
Little girl’s short stories

On the eve of her birthday party, her mother eagerly started buying party flavors for her party. She had invited some friends and her cousins to join her in celebration. Her older sister had baked a big yellow cake with hips of chocolate frosting, her flavor kind of cake. She even had the chance to lick the frosting off the spoon. She became excited at dust the evening before her party, anticipating the thought of turning another year older. She tried not to get overly anxious because she knew how that time of the year could be like; yet her mother had promise her she could have the party since the weather was unseasonably warm for that time of the year. As she looked out from her window that evening she prayed that the little white trickles of snowflakes that had began to fall from the sky would go away. However the weathermen were broadcasting a snow storm traveling in Chicago’s direction. Before she went to bed that night the few snowflakes she had saw had tapered off.

The next morning when she awakens, the day of her birthday January 26, 1967 the great snowstorm of Chicago was well on its way. She had made 9 years old and the storm had started at 5:05 a.m. and continued to fall throughout Friday with an accumulation of 23 inches, with drifts up to 6 feet. Although trains were running, cars buses and planes didn’t. All schools, offices and work places were closed for several days. People had to walk to their homes and camp out in the airports and/or get hotel rooms. The little girl was heartbroken because once again she was unable to celebrate her birthday with her family and friends. Her chocolate cake sat in the fridge untouched, because of the chaos of her surroundings.
She did have some enjoyment that day and the day after, although the schools were closed, which she hated because she loved going to school, it was her time and her space, she didn’t like being at home all day with her sisters and brothers because they often fought over who was going to watch what program on the television set. Something most kids these days doesn’t have to worry about. Although she loved the snow, unlike the 3 W monsters, she had name. So yes she was excited about playing in the snow, even though it was so high, she almost got buried in it as she tramped through it to play. She watched all of the snow-buried cars in the streets. Delivery trucks stalled in the middle of the streets because there was nowhere on the streets for the cars could get through.

People were scrambling everywhere trying to get to stores that were open to get enough food for their homes, until the storm passed over.
On her block mid-ways Mr. Shelton store was open because he lived in the back of his store. She thought he stayed at his store because he was afraid that the teenagers would break in and steal what little he had in it. No deliveries could be made so he didn't have much any way. Mr. Shelton was a big black man, charging double for everything he had in his little storefront store. But the kids like to go to his store because he was so close for the neighborhood kids to travel to and when he turned his back they would grab some junk and run out.

The little girl saw on many incidents when a gang of kids would come in the store and he would go to the back to get his shot gun to scare them off. After the snow storm and the lack of food deliveries, he was force to close his store himself. He had no bread, no produce, and some of the other necessary items that were needed to keep business running. The little girl only had a canceled birthday party, but the city was stricken hard by the snowstorm.

Businesses were forced to close, 60 deaths were attributed to the storm, mostly because of heart attacks from shoveling snow. There were 273 looters arrested during the storm, this was a mess even for a nine year old girl to remember, one of the worst snowstorms in over 80 years, since the one that occurred on her birthday in 1967.


Beware of the 3 W Monsters
The little girl’s short stories

The little girls knew that the 3 W monsters loved to attack her, during the frigid months of winter. Its locality is in the windy city. The 3 W monsters plotted its attack, waiting behind corners, outside the doors, anticipating its next move. It would sneak up behind her before she can get the chance to fight it off. Somehow it always manages to confiscate her. Some say its mother nature, others, the acts of God, scientist said that such clouds occasionally produced by the rising over artic and Antarctic mountains in high polar latitudes during the winter months, now days global warming is the cause of it, however, the little girl knew it as the 3 W monsters, the Whispering, Whirling, Wind Monster.
Before she leaves out of her door, she covers herself with layers of clothing, preparing herself with her safety garments wrapping her scarf twice around her face and mouth, trying to protecting herself from its piecing attacks. It waits for her, mischievously antagonizing her. She could see from the window, the white crystal-like particles had formed into icicles; the windowpane had setup frost along its corners. It’s making rapping noises against the window. Her thoughts are of dread, as she walks into the hallway leading towards the entrance, prolonging the torture for as long as she could.

First it’ll wait for her to leave her comfortable home, as she reached for the door, pulling it open, the Whirling monster with extreme force pushed her off balance, she only ten years old, so she doesn’t weigh much to hold up her balance, as she proceed to the outside, she make haste, walking with speed, concentrating on dodging its trenchant blows, then out come the Whistling monster, it whistled around her ear, in rhythmic tunes “I ‘m gonna get you… I’m gonna get you, look… out little girl.” She secured her scarf, pulled down her hat as far as she could move rapidly, to halt the Wind monsters blows. Instead it whirls at her face, traveling down her neck, with sharp pains, it start piercing at her ears, nipping at her nose and face moving consistently towards her hands and fingers. Her eyes became watery; she quickly dried her eyes so the tears don’t freeze. The Whispering, Whirling, Wind Monster tried to cut off her breath. Her toes were numb; threaten frostbite, as she moved behind a tall building to shelter herself from the brutal Wind monster, however, as soon as she began to feel a little safe from it atrocious attacks, it makes blustery wind sounds lingering in the air, as it turns around the corner in a whirl-about movement, the wind monster is so clever and powerful it continues to assault her blow-by-blow.

So the little girl was ready to surrender, relinquishing any thoughts of reaching her destination, she couldn’t handle the 3 W monsters, refusing its constant assaults on her, she runs back home dodging its gust. Half way into her home she slips and falls hard on the ice. She manages to get up from the ground and quickly rushing to her door, she grabs her keys out of her pockets, avoid removing her gloves, as her key enters the key hole the lock wouldn’t turn, she realizes the lock was frozen and so were her hands. She reaches up with one hand, deciding to ring the bell. The response wasn’t quick enough as she entered the house, securely blocking out the winter monster, as she rapidly found heat in the warmth of her home, she immediately removes her boots, her coat, as she nursed her wounds, massaging her toes and hands.

She dreaded ever leaving out in Chicago’s windy city Frigid cold for fear of its adverse critical abuse.


Tiara mom had insisted that she leave her son at her house since the weather was so bad outside. When she left work that evening she had every intention to go to her Wednesday’s scheduled class, which she had spoke with Tyi and told him she was going earlier that day. On her way there she decided it was too bad and headed home.

During her drive home she saw several spin-outs and she couldn’t wait to get in her home safely. As she walks in her home the lights were out in the entire house, assuming her husband was not there, she took off her coat and boots and walked straight towards her bedroom. Half ways she heard noises and couldn’t make out the sounds at first. Then she heard a woman’s screams, a moaning, followed by more screams, she thought maybe Tyi had fell asleep with the television on with the volume high. She stopped immediately the sounds were nearby, and then she heard a man’s voice, her husband’s voice penetrated in her ear. She had become mystified and lost in thought, not believing what she was hearing.

The women shouted out “Tyrone don’t stop baby it feels so good!” then the moaning was intense. She knew it was not the television as she had once thought, she knew her husband could make a woman cry out in such ecstasy, as this woman was lost in desire. Obviously Tiara face was flushed and she became furious, not to mention numb at the thought of another woman in her home and in her bed with her husband, making love to him, lying on her sheets. She couldn’t believe he could stoop so low, moaning in delight as he spills out of his mouth how good she felt.

Tiara moves gradually towards the half open door, distressed by the startling passion being displayed right before her eyes. Tyrone didn’t hear nor see her walk in the half-lit bedroom, her hands were trembling, her mouth was completely dry, her eyes were filled with tears, as her stomach became revolted, her mind enraged. His lips and hands were all over her body, as he grows engulfed in his lust. Her eyes were shut; her legs were wrapped around the base of his neck, her greasy-ass Geri-Curls pressed deep into the pillow, as her head flowingly moves from side- to-side. She cries out over again. “I love you baby” “I love you Tyi”

The purse that Tiara had still hanging on her shoulders, slips off, falling to the floor and both Tyrone and the strange woman in her bed was startled by the noise and jumped up hastily. The woman reached quickly for the sheet that was hanging from the bed onto the floor. Tyrone eyes had widened with shock, and his face flush disclosing mortification. He couldn’t look straight at Tiara’s tear strained eyes as she shouted “get out!!” “Get out of my damn house Tyi… take your slut with you!!” She quickly walked out of the room leaving both of them standing there looking obtuse.

She knew Tyrone would follow her so she went into her son Terry room and lock the door. She was right about Tyrone as quickly as he could get his ex-girlfriend out of the house he was banging on the door for Tiara to open it so they could talk. He repeated over and over that he was sorry and that she, the ex-girlfriend didn’t mean anything to him and that he truly loves her. Tiara never spoke a word she just listens to his alleged lies. Her tears were heavy and her head was pounding.

She wanted to beat him with a baseball bat, but she knew if she even made any attempt to open the door, he would be waiting there to grasp hold of her until he convince her to forgive him. She loathed him at that point and every moment that went by the images of their sexual acts in her home stained her brain, at that point she felt this was unforgivable and he had the audacity to try convincing her of his undying love for her. “. “I asked you to leave… my home” “Please leave me alone.” She said as her voice cracked. She heard the front door slam behind him.

As she walks to her son bed and lay across the bed drowning in her tears, an hour later she drifts off to sleep. When she awake her clothing was damp and she remove everything but her underwear and walked in her kitchen, reaching in her cabinet for a glass, as she rinse out her glass she headed for the fridge but decided instead of her wine she wanted to get something a little stronger. However in the china cabinet Tyrone had some bottles of liquor in it. She poured herself a glass half full of gin, gulping it down as fast as she could. She returned to her son room incapable of facing her bedroom. Still carrying the bottle of gin in her hand, this time she slept soundly passing out drunk.

When she had awakened Tyrone was standing over her looking very pathetic. “Tia baby I love you so much, and I ‘m sorry for hurting you.” He declared before she could start shouting at him again. “Please baby let’s work this out, I don’t want to lose you baby.” He said continuing his plead for forgiveness. She gave him a piercing look with her blood shot eyes. “You got to be kidding me Tyi; you had sex with another woman in our home, and in our bed, so how in the world do you expect me to forgive you for that.” She said in a serene tone. Tyrone didn’t answer her searching for words. “Tell me Tyi, how long have you been sleeping with the slut?” she questioned. “I know you don’t believe what I ‘m telling you but I only had sex with her a few times, and that was all too it, just sex. I found out months ago that she had my child when we broke up she did not tell me that she was pregnant with my child, however, I know she had a baby a couple of months before we got married but I swear I didn’t know it was my baby girl she gave birth too. Dominique was always messing around with a lot of guys, that’s the reason we broke up in the first place.” He said as he became silent. “So what makes you think that she has change Tyrone, she just had sex with a married man?” “I know I messed up Tia.” “Lets face it Tyi there has to be more than just sex between the two of you, after you have broke it off with her over four years ago and now you’re telling me that its just sex nothing else.” “You can’t keep your stuff in your pants. You bring another woman in our house in our bed, and then you tell me she is the mother of your four year old daughter. You tell me Tyi, “and… now who’s zooming’ who?” “I need you to pack your things and get out of my sight; I am not up for your B.S. right now. So please leave now…” She hollered angrily.

Tyrone grabbed as many of his things as he could and left out of the house hastily. Tiara sobs became intense once again, realizing that her marriage was a total lie. She not only had to deal with her husband infidelity, but the fact that she was in the center of some baby momma drama as well, made her heart ached in pain. She wondered how she will get pass all of this. As each day that came and went by, she worked towards mending the pieces of her broke heart. She writes a poem in her journal about her marriage.

Reflections of her weary face


While she glances at the reflections of her weary face,
Her heart is beating at a rapid pace,
She Prays for Gods love and his amazing grace,
While she glances at the reflections of her weary face
Her body is yarning for husband’s embrace,
She wonders how she got to this dim place,
While she glances at the reflections of her weary face
Her ears hear his laughter throughout the empty space;
She has lost the trust inside of her without a trace,
While she glances at the reflections of her weary face
Her soul feels like it has been displace
She realizes her marriage was a total disgrace.
While she glances at the reflections of her weary face

Now 8 months later, as her life unravels, in her perspective her life is an analogy to the prongs on an adapter, attached to a device, and destined for a re-charge…

Impressum

Texte: Written By Linda Dyanne Bolden-©-Copyright 2008
Tag der Veröffentlichung: 11.02.2010

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