I
don't trust anyone. No one gets me.
"Eve, get up." says my mom. I put my head under my pillow. I want to stay in the darkness forever.
"Eve!" shouts my mom. Slowly, I get up from my bed and walk over to the mirror. I see this dark red mark on my lip. "Eve, did you get into a fight again?" asks my mom. I don't say anything. My mom doesn't understand. No one does.
Reaching out for my phone, I see the text message. Will died.
Will was my first friend. He was the one who taught me how to fight. He was the one who changed me.
The phone starts to shake in my hand. Then it drops.
"Eve, are you OK?" asks mom. I look at her. She looks concerned.
"I just want you to be happy like you used to be." she whispers. Then she leaves the room.
I just stare at the phone. I stare at it until the screen turns black.
-3 years ago-
I smile at the mirror. My hair's all curled, my makeup's perfect and my outfit is all new. I high five at the mirror and leave the house.
Walking down to the park, I spot Vinn. I wave to him. I can see him walking towards me. "Hey! So where are we going? The movies?" I ask. Vinn isn't smiling. Maybe he's in a bad mood. "We're not going anywhere." he says. "Wait. What do you mean?" I ask. Vinn suddenly starts laughing like a maniac. "I knew that you can be a dumb bitch." he says.
I freeze. Every part of my brain is frozen. What did he just say?
"Did you hear that? I'm breaking up with you." he says.
"But-" I start. "But what? I wanted to date you cause no one else went out with you." he scoffs. He looks at the necklace that he gave me for Christmas last year. "You shouldn't be wearing that shit." he says. He walks closer to me. I take a step back. "No. Get away from me." I say.
But Vinn doesn't listen. He yanks the necklace off, throws it to the grounds and crushes it with his foot. I can hear all the gems getting crushed. Then he laughs again.
Warm liquid starts to trickle down my neck. It's my blood.
Vinn goes close to me again. "Get away from me you bastard." I say. But my voice comes out all shaky. He laughs.
"Calling me the bastard now?" He looks at my neck then looks at my face again. "You did this to me." I say pointing to my neck. Vinn laughs. Then I do it. I slap his face. Vinn stops laughing and looks at me with eyes that I've never seen before.
"Bitch." He says. He pushes me to the ground. I hit my head on the concrete ground. I try to get up but Vinn pushes me down again with his foot. I can feel my makeup getting ruined. No please make this stop.
He rubs his foot all over my face. Mud and dirt go into my mouth and eyes. I start to scream. Anyone, please. Just help me.
"You're too loud, bitch." he says. He kicks my face and I can taste blood and dirt. He's laughing while kicking my face.
I pretend to be knocked out. Luckily, Vinn believes it, and stops kicking me. I can hear his sneakers going to his car. I hear the engine turn on. And then Vinn's gone. Slowly, I open my eyes. And cry.
-Now-
My mom drives me to school. "Have fun at school." she says. I don't say anything back and slam the old car door shut. I trudge past kids and go to my locker. I see a new guy standing by my homeroom. I take my books and go to homeroom. I sit down in the back row.
The bell rings and kids file into the classroom.
"Now, we have a new student here named Zaz Loman." says Ms. Bt. "He's frickin hot." whispers bitchy Megan Holly. I can hear everyone whispering about this new guy.
"And you'll sit right next to Eve Quence." says Ms. Bt. The whispering stops. "Eve! Raise your hand!" she says. Slowly, I raise my hand. Zaz walks over to the empty desk next to me. He sits down and my body tenses. What the hell is wrong with me?
"And I forgot another student. Can you please walk into the class?" asks Ms. Bt. I stop breathing when I see who it is.
Vinn Arker strides into the room.
"Everyone, this is Vinn Arker." says Ms. Bt. I hear whispers about how hot he looks. My inside turns ice cold when his eyes spot me. He smiles. I don't smile back.
I hate my life.
I don't look at him as he walks down the rows of desks and sits next to Megan Holly. I wait for the bell to ring. It doesn't listen to me.
"Hey Eve." says his voice. Vinn shut the hell up.
I don't bother to look at him. "Eve." says the voice. I close my eyes. I can't be weak. I can't be weak.
"What?" I ask forcing myself to look at him. He smiles. "You got prettier." Bullshit.
I find myself stealing a glance at Zaz, but he doesn't even seem to notice anything. I look back at Vinn. "Thanks." I say with a plastered smile. "You're welcome." he says. Fuck him.
The stupid bell rings and I hurry out of the class.
Rushing to first period, I feel someone jerking me back.
It's Vinn.
I take a deep breath. "What do you want?" I ask.
"I just want to say hi." he says.
"Well you should have said hi in homeroom." I say turning to go to my class.
Vinn's quiet. Then he says, "You gonna come to the football game? I'll be playing." I stop walking. He gives me a smile that once turned me to goop. "Sorry. I have things to do." I reply.
"Like what?" he asks.
I clench my fists. "Vinn, just leave me alone." I say. But before he can say anything else, I turn and speed-walk to first period.
I spot Zaz sitting in one of the front row desks. "Hey." I say to him. He looks at me. I can feel myself getting hot. Shit. Why does he have to be so cute?
"Uh, hi." he says. I stop myself from turning stupid. I can't let myself go. I can't.
I already made a mistake before. I'm not gonna let it happen again.
"You're gonna hate this teacher." I mutter.
Zaz laughs which surprises me. "Well, let's find out." he says.
Just as the last bell rings, Mr. Equi marches into the room. "Hello my little subjects." he says. "Today we will be learning about the French-Revolution."
I yawn.
Class ends quickly and I pack my handout for the 13 paged essay on the French Revolution into my folder. "Eve." says a voice. It's Zaz. I'm surprised that he remembered my name.
"You were right about the teacher." he says. "I told you. He's the devil." I say. Quickly, I gather my stuff and head for the door. Zaz follows me. I feel his eyes on me.
"What?" I ask. "It's just that I think I've seen you before." he says. "You mean in homeroom?" I ask. Zaz smiles showing perfect little dimples on his cheek. "No, I mean outside of school." he says. "Well I think you hit your head because I've never seen you before." I say bluntly. Zaz shrugs. "Well see you!" he says smiling. I feel myself smiling back. No. You have to control yourself.
School goes by fast and I'm packing to go home. "Hey!" shouts a voice. I look to find Zaz walking towards me. "Hey. Are you walking?" he asks. "Yea." I say. Then we're quiet. I kick the leaves as I walk.
"I like fall." Zaz says randomly. I look at him. "There's a lot you can do." he continues. Then he smiles. "What?" I ask. "What are you gonna be for Halloween?" I stare at him, or at least try to. "Really? Halloween? No one even celebrates it in high school." I say. "Don't you like candy?" he asks. "Well, yea. But-" "Then you should celebrate it." Zaz says. He zippers up his jacket.
"Well, what are you going to be for Halloween?" I ask. "A butler." he says. I start laughing. "Seriously? A butler? Can't you be a prince or something?" Wait. What did I just say?
My face starts to burn. Luckily, I had a scarf to cover my cheeks. "Princes are too bratty." Zaz says. Then he grins. I look away from him. Then it gets quiet again. I sneak a glance at Zaz. He's looking at his phone. I sigh and turn a corner. "Hey! Wait up!" shouts a voice. It's Zaz. "Your house is this way too?" I ask. Ugh. Why do I sound so stupid?
He nods. Then I hear his
voice.
"Hey!" Vinn strolls towards us. He looks at me then at Zaz. "Hey." says Zaz. Vinn smiles then looks at me. "So can you make it to the game?" he asks. I don't say anything.
"Well, I have to go. See you." says Zaz. He smiles at me, nods at Vinn and starts walking away. No. Don't leave me.
Vinn looks at me. "Well?" he asks. "I'm not your girlfriend anymore. So stay the hell away from me." I say. "So that's your answer?" he asks. There's this weird silence. "You like that Zaz kid right?" he says finally. I suddenly feel all hot. "No. We're just friends."I say. "You really don't like me do you?" Vinn says. "You're right. I don't like you." I say. "Ever since that
day." I add. "I learned that your a selfish fucked up bastard." Oh. My God. What did I just say?
A muscle in Vinn's face twitches. I turn and start to walk away. I can hear Vinn calling my name and telling me that he's sorry and that he should have never done that. That's all bullshit. I don't listen to him. I walk with my head held up high, looking straight ahead; the rest of the way home. I've never been so happy before.
Texte: COPYRIGHT 2012.
Tag der Veröffentlichung: 11.01.2012
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Widmung:
To my family and friends.
xoxo, love you guys!