Chapter 1
“As we stand before one another… I can’t think of anything other than love and eternity. Love is in your eyes, it’s in your touch, and it lives inside of you like new life in a mother’s womb at its most delicate and precious stage. I am consumed by your love, there is no me without you. I live to see your smile, to hear your laugh and to feel your touch. I promise here today and for all eternity that I will always love and protect you in return for this gift you’ve given me, in which I am so undeserving and yet so privileged and blessed to have and accept. I take you, Sahona Angel Story to be my wedded wife, in love and in fidelity and for a lifetime or two.”

Ian and I stood staring into one another’s eyes on a lush beautiful beach in Jamaica under the soft sun at dusk, and though the evening was still very warm, the mist of the ocean and the gentle breeze that seemed to gracefully dance through my hair and the bottom of my winter white dress, kept us just cool enough. The sound of the waves seemed to be the perfect background music for such a beautiful motion picture. I remember those vows Ian made to me as if he said them yesterday. What stood out to me the most is that he said he would love me for a lifetime or two, that meant beyond forever…and I honestly believed he was capable of that.

Most every bride says that she will never forget her wedding day but for me, it was truly more than a wedding day. Not only was it the day that we symbolized our love before the world and God but Ian was truly my knight and shining armor that seemed to had leaped into my life and saved me, and committing through marriage was the last way of making our commitment official. However, we were truly one flesh, one mind and one heart for all eternity long before I became Mrs. Sahona Legrou.

Ian grew up fighting most of his life because of the way he looked. His mother was Latino and his father was black and even though he didn’t really look very interracial, he was often picked on because of his fine curly hair and cocoa milky skin. Some considered him to be a “pretty boy,” which always seemed to force him to have to claim his territory and prove that he was tough and man enough to hold his own, and so he learned to use fighting at times as a survival method in many ways.

At age ten Ian was away at a friend’s house when he lost his parents in a very tragic accident. A drunk driver plowed into the front of their home while his mom and dad sat in the living room watching television. The car exploded and his parents were crushed by the debris and killed instantly. The only family Ian had was his grandfather who was too old to care for him.

Since Ian was already a pre-teen no one rushed to adopt him, so he went from foster home to foster home. Fortunately, he settled with a foster family that was very well off and lived in an affluent neighborhood and therefore we attended the same high school. Somewhere along the way Ian lost a year of school so he was older than me but we were in the same grade.

Ian and I met during our sophomore year in high school but before we actually met I had noticed him at basketball games and in the halls from time to time but I was sure that such an attractive guy on the basketball team had too many girls chasing him to ever notice me. However, I was consumed with all the activities I was involved in so I didn’t have much time to focus on chasing any boy.

Then one afternoon I was running late for class and decided to cut through the gym to save time even though there was a gym class in session. I tried to clumsily dart across the basketball court when suddenly a basketball came flying at me full speed and struck me directly in my face. My vision cleared slowly and besides the vivid stars going around my head, I could see a guy kneeling beside me with the prettiest, deepest, darkest, almost black colored eyes, apologizing emphatically. I insisted that I was okay until I realized that blood was gushing from my nose. I was so embarrassed so I quickly got up and rushed away to the lavatory while never looking back at him.

Later that afternoon, I sat anxiously in my last class waiting for the clock to strike three so I could hurry home in an effort to attempt to avoid any questions as to why I was wearing a big white bandage on my nose. To my surprise, I had seemed to go unnoticed and was able to make it through the rest of the day and was very close to making it home until I heard the sound of a bouncing basketball getting closer and closer to me from behind. I tried to step to the side to allow the person to pass me but then I felt a tap on my shoulder. I stopped in place without turning around, but he walked in front of me and began to speak, “Hi, Sahona, that’s your name right?”

The first thing I thought was, Oh god it’s the guy that hit me with the ball and he’s so cute, but then when our eyes met I just wanted to reach out and rub his smooth, cocoa skin. I quickly noticed how tall he was and his thick and muscular build, his body was every bit built like a model athlete. His deep-dark brown eyes seemed to look right through me. His jet black wavy hair was cut very low but it was obvious it was very soft and fine. I thought he teetered tottered between pretty and handsome but his very strong masculine features couldn’t be ignored.

I quickly made those observations as my eyes moved about nervously in every which direction, but I knew I needed to look at him, consistently in his eyes with confidence so he wouldn’t realize just how embarrassed and nervous I really was. I wanted him to think that I thought the whole situation was no big deal.
“Yeah, I’m Sahona.”

“I wanted to apologize for hitting you with the basketball again. I feel terrible,” he said embarrassed.

“No, it was totally my fault for cutting across the gym, I know better. I’ve seen people get hurt plenty of times before. I guess I had a superwoman moment,” I said as I laughed.

“Honestly, I thought you were one of my teammates and I was just trying to hurry and get you the ball. I guess that shows that I’m not really that good of a player,” he said humorously.

“I guess I’m not a good player either because obviously I didn’t catch the ball with the right body part,” I replied laughing and pointing to my nose.

“I waited for you outside the girl’s bathroom but you took so long and I had to get to class.”

“I understand… I was in there forever. I really didn’t want anyone making a fuss about this. I cleaned myself up so well that Mr. Jamison didn’t even believe why I was late for class and he ended up giving me a detention. The funny thing is, the minute I stepped out of his class my nose started bleeding like crazy and I had to end up going to the nurse and she made me wear this stupid bandage.”

“Now I really feel like an asshole. You can get a note or something from the nurse to take to Mr. J so that you can get out of detention, right?”

“Yeah I could, we’ll see.”

“Sahona, again I am truly sorry. I gotta catch this bus downtown to the rec center for training so I’ll see you tomorrow,” he said as he rushed off to get on the bus.

“Wait, what’s your name?” I yelled inquisitively.

“You know my name!” He yelled arrogantly and with a big smile from the bus door.

He was right, I knew his name all along but I didn’t want to let him know that.

The next afternoon, I sat in detention reading. I could have given Mr. Jamison a note from the nurse but I didn’t mind being in detention because I wasn’t anxious to be at home. I happened to look up and was surprised to see Ian walking in the detention room. I couldn’t help but smile with confusion as he came to sit next to me.

“What are you doing here?! What did you do?”

“I threw all the basketballs around the gym after we lost the game and then I refused to pick them up.”

“Oh so you’re a sore loser huh?” I asked jokingly.

“No, not at all. I just knew this is where you would be. I figured we could do “your time” together.”

“You did that for me?” I asked shocked and humored.

“It’s the least I could do. Oh by the way, I was joking yesterday, my name is Ian. I guess I just want to believe that I’m more popular than I really am.”
“Well actually I did know your name but anyway it’s nice to meet you Ian.”

The teacher interrupted, “Unless you two want an additional day in detention, I suggest you be quiet.”

Ian and I finished out detention and he insisted on walking me home.

“Ian, you mentioned you had training yesterday. What are you training for, what else do you do besides play basketball?”

“I box and honestly my foster parents insist I play ball. I just do it to keep them off my back. I have to catch the bus all the way downtown to train for boxing. In this high and mighty neighborhood you can’t find a place to do stuff like that. I hope to get a car soon though, I’m working on one but the parts I need are too expensive right now.”

“Oh really? Boxing seems dangerous and violent. I never understood why men like to pound themselves for other people’s entertainment.”

“It’s more to it than that, it’s a good sport. I like boxing but I like the money a lot more. Big time boxers get paid a lot of money. I can’t say I like getting punched or beating up some other guy, it’s just something I’ve been doing for a long time in and out the ring but mostly out the ring. Besides that, it gives me an excuse to go to my old
neighborhood. My dad and I practically lived at the rec so I guess it reminds me of a better time before I had to go into foster care. Plus I’m just trying to save up some money for when I age out of foster care and will be on my own. But anyway maybe you can come watch a fight one night and see that it’s not so bad.”

“I don’t know, maybe. Thanks for walking me home, this is my house.”

“Sahona…. Can I call you Honny?”

“Sure, that’s different. I kinda like it. I’ve never had a nickname before.”

“Well Honny, it looks like your nose healed nicely,” he said as he kissed it tenderly.

“Thanks… Ian, Wow…,” I said slightly bewildered.

“Do you think that maybe we can get together outside of school?” He asked cautiously.

“You mean... like a date?”

“Yeah, a date...”

“Sure…”

“Okay, well I’ll call you tonight and we can figure out when and where,” he said as he began to walk off the porch.

“You don’t have my number!” I yelled.

“I guess that means you have to give it me,” he said proudly while turning to face me as if his scheme had worked.

“Smooth… Smooth… I walked right into that one!” I said laughing.

After we exchanged numbers something so natural came over us and we shared a simple kiss and from that day on Ian and I were inseparable.

We were the perfect couple, I was the cute cheerleader and Ian was the cute basketball player. It just seemed right that we were together. Even though we were a little caught up in the hype of becoming the new most popular couple, we really grew to love one another.

Ian was my first everything, my first slow dance, my first kiss, I gave him my virginity and most certainly he was my first love. He made me feel like romance and friendship based on true love was real and possible. He truly brought out the best in me and in turn I could easily give him my best in return. We were young but I knew he would be apart of my life forever. He taught me about love and I couldn’t imagine sharing that feeling with anyone else. He was everything that I had never been exposed to, the things that romance novels are made of and love songs, and those perfect ending movies where the couple runs off into the sunset and live happily ever after. Those possibilities looked real now and not just someone’s imagination on paper or in a movie. I was truly on cloud nine every moment I was with him.

At times it crossed my mind that our relationship was just too good to be true. We never argued, instead we always compromised quickly as if being upset with each other was the worse thing in the world. He was always the perfect gentleman and considerate of my feelings and needs. If I was having a bad day he went far and beyond just to make me smile. There was one day I recall when I had terrible PMS, I was moody and just miserable. Right before lunch I found a decorated brown paper bag inside of my locker, it had a childishly drawn happy face, hearts, trees, grass and the ocean on it. Inside it was one tampon, a panty liner, a snickers bar, some Motrin, a cheeseburger and fries and a note that said, “I love you, feel better please.” Not only did I crack up laughing because he pretty much had it right, but it was the sweetest and most thoughtful thing anyone had ever done for me, especially a guy. I asked him later how he came up with those things to put inside the bag and he said he researched it on the Internet. I often wanted to return the favor but Ian never seemed to have bad days but if there was anything else he wanted or needed, I gladly provided.

Chapter 2

After Ian and I had dated for two years, I began to think about introducing him to my parents if I could get them to focus for maybe only just ten minutes. My parents were very successful and wealthy, however whether they thought so or not we had our issues. I can recall feeling sick to my stomach to find a picture of me as a newborn with one of my nannies breast feeding me. I confronted my mother about it and she laughed and said I had no idea how hard it was to find a nanny that could do that and how it was better than Similac. I was resentful of that statement but my resentment for Mother and Father, as I was instructed to call them, started long before I found that picture.

Having a real conversation with my mother or father was rare. As a First Officer of a major airline, my mother was always away traveling and my father “the surgeon” was always at the hospital or sleep between glasses of bourbon. I used to think, If only his patients knew an alcoholic was slicing them open. Actually, they were probably safer with him drunk because he was never sober and I truly believed he didn’t know how to be.

My parent’s marriage was like a wonderful and successful business arrangement. I can’t prove it but I would swear by my life that they must have made a pact that if neither of them fell in love by a certain age that they would just marry one another and live “the American dream.” They often traded hi-fives for accomplishments instead of hugs and kisses. They scheduled time together like a business meeting. Fortunately though, my parents really liked each other as friends and/or as people. If my father was sad or depressed after losing a patient, my mother would buy him a new bottle of bourbon and a new porno. I knew this because I would hear my mother giving him the DVD and introducing the title like it was a bestselling book. Her very next words would be, “I got you a new bottle of bourbon, let me refresh your glass.” She knew full well that he was an alcoholic, though he would be appreciative and the “great arrangement” would fall right back into place.

This worked for them but I felt our house was ridged, cold, lonely and never felt like a home. I felt like the walls surrounded and engaged me like a cold dungeon. Our house was elaborate and beautiful but I still felt so alone and isolated, I could call out and no one would hear me, so that’s what it was to me, my own personal dungeon. I swore to myself that if I ever got married that my home would be the exact opposite, full of sincere love, concern and attention for one another.

Besides being a part of the bigger picture of the American dream, they never really paid much attention to me. My parents loved me dearly and I would occasionally get a sincere hug or kiss from them but neither one of them really had a clue how to truly express their love for me. We all had our roles and I wasn’t supposed to do anything but play mine and play it well, and for all of my life I tried to play it as perfectly as I could.

Mother and Father promised me that for graduation they would buy me a new car, and I was so excited about it because I wanted to get it and just drive off to college and start a new life of my own. Most teens at my school were already driving the newest luxury cars which they got for their sweet sixteen birthdays. But my parents felt that because I wanted it so bad that if they waited and held it as a ransom almost, this was their guarantee that I wouldn’t let anything come between me graduating. I had my own plans without them needing to hold bait over my head and graduating was definitely one of them.

Ian and I were applying to all the same colleges and we were hoping that one would accept both of us because our plan was to get out of there together and not look back. If Mother and Father had ever actually really talked to me they would have known of my convictions and the plans that I had for my future. However, they didn’t know anything about me and they especially had no idea about Ian.

After contemplating a little longer, I had finally settled on the thought that since Ian and I were both seniors and very serious about one another, that I should in fact go ahead and tell my parents about us. He had been right under their noses for the entire two years anyway and I had actually lost my virginity to him in my own bed while they were home. He had spent the night at our house for days at a time and even had clothes all over my room and still they had no idea. So now it was just time to place him directly in front of their faces, so I scheduled a dinner with them for the first time, I wrote my name and a time in an open date slot on the scheduling calendar that loosely hung from the refrigerator for that ridiculous purpose.

Days later, I sat politely while watching my parents arrive at the dinner table while apologizing for being late as they sat in their normal chairs as if they were assigned seats. It was always the same scene whenever we would have dinner together, Mother at one end of the table and Father at the far opposite end with work related stories flying back and forth across the table with the most annoying business like laughter filling the air at the punch lines. After some time they would turn their attention to me, with subtle looks of disappointment on their faces realizing that I wasn’t participating. Usually I would say nothing at all while offering only a fake pretentious smile as I put my hands in the air to let them know that I had nothing to share and for them to continue among themselves. However, this time, I did have something to say, “Mother…, Father, there is someone here that I want you to meet.”

“Sahona, you never bring friends home to meet us, what a nice surprise. Well, where is she?” Mother said intrigued.

“He,” I emphasized, “is in the other room.”

“He…?” Father repeated.

I excused myself from the table and came back into the dining room hand in hand with Ian and motioned for him to take the seat next to me.

“Hello Mr. and Mrs. Story. It’s nice to finally meet you. My name is Ian.”

Father gulped down his drink as if the situation was sobering him too quickly.

“Hello Ian, Sahona hasn’t mentioned you before. Are you from around here son?” Father asked.

“Yes, I live two streets over, the Valley Springs Estates.”

“Hmmm… very nice. So that means you go to school with Sahona… What do your parents do for a living?” Mother inquired.

“Mr. and Mrs. Rumsart are too up in age to work and besides that there are eight other children living there so I guess that is their job.”

“I know much about the Rumsarts. They’ve opened their home to strays.”

“Mother!” I yelled angrily.

“Excuse me, maybe that isn’t the correct terminology, children without parents, foster kids, yeah that’s it… So you’re obviously one of their foster children?”

“Yes, I am.”

Father interrupted once he had just enough bourbon to get that buzz back that allowed him to function properly.
“So what’s the nature of your relationship with our daughter?”

“Honny and I have been dating for two years now and...”

“Honny!” Mother interrupted, “Her name is Sahona! That’s the name I specifically gave her, and it’s Indian meaning patience, which is what I needed for the nine months she beat up my body! Her middle name is Angel because when I found out I was pregnant with her, it was like an Angel had told me a beautiful story. So you get it? Sahona Angel Story? I put a lot of thought into that name so please don’t do that ghetto abbreviation thing.”

“Ok… I’m sorry. Well as I was saying, Sahona and I have been dating for two years now and I love her with all my heart.”

“What do you want to do after high school Ian, is it?” Father inquired.

“Yes, it’s Ian and I want to be a teacher.”
Mother let out a loud deviant laugh.

Ian continued proudly, “I love children and besides boxing, I tutor at the recreation center.”

“Boxing? What recreation center? There aren’t any recreations centers around here,” Mother snapped back.

“No, you’re right it is downtown,” Ian replied.
Mother and Father’s faces seemed to cringe at the same time. I couldn’t put Ian through anymore, we weren’t even halfway through dinner but to imagine him going a second longer dealing with their snobby interrogation was more than I could bear.

“Look! I just wanted you to meet the person I’m dating and will probably marry after we graduate from college. I can’t allow you to sit here and look down on him a minute longer. He makes me happy and whether you accept him or not, he’s who I am dating and now you know.”

I grabbed Ian’s hand and led him to the door, “Ian I’m sorry, I figured it would be exactly like this but I just thought it was time they knew.”

“Don’t worry about it Honny, your mom didn’t hear that did she?” He joked, “No really, you’re all that matters to me. I really don’t care what they think.”
“Good and you’re coming back tonight, right? I’ll leave the patio door open as usual.”

“Of course, I’ll see you some time before midnight.”

We kissed and I shut the door behind him. I tried to go straight upstairs to my bedroom but as soon as I walked past the dinning room, Mother called for me and insisted, “Sahona! We need to talk about this boy.”
“Mother there is nothing to talk about.”

“Sahona, you need to stay focused on finishing school and getting into a good college. Maybe if you focused a little more you could have received a scholarship or something. This is not the time to divide your attention any more,” Mother said adamantly.

“Mother, I have been focused. Ian is helping me focus if anything.”

“Besides, you are talking about marrying him after college…he wants to be a teacher! What do they make now, $30,000? No one can live off that! You being a lawyer and him a teacher, you’d be marrying beneath you,” Father slurred.
“And I don’t mean to sound funny but he’s a stray. Were his parents on drugs or something?” Mother asked with no shame.

“NO! His parents were killed!” I said annoyed.
“Well Sahona, you’re not going to be his hootchie “Honny” video girl or whatever, living downtown playing around at intercity recreation centers. On top of that, he’s violent, all boxer’s are, that’s why they box to get out aggression and when they are not in the ring they are beating their wives and kids.”

Father drunkenly agreed and Mother continued, “Look at that Mike what’s his name… biting off someone’s ear. Oh Sahona no!” She laughed, “So I say, put all this behind you and focus on your future and when you’re ready, you’ll find some nice doctor like your father or lawyer to marry. This one isn’t for you baby… Get this out of your mind. Okay?” Mother tried to say with affection.

“Get this out of my mind?” I repeated in amazement.

“Yeah, sleep on it. You’ll realize what we’re saying in the morning. I’ll tell you what Sahona, you know I can be a little more open-minded than your mother, so I promise that we’ll think over you’re little friendship and see if we can come up with some guidelines so that you can still be at least friends, okay?” Father stated between sips of the alcohol that filled the air with the most sickening aroma.

I just turned my back to them and hurried to my bedroom. I could hear them laughing hysterically as if I had just held a comedy show for their entertainment. Father’s slurring words and Mother laughing at herself as if she was so clever coming up with all sorts of insults about Ian made me sick to my stomach.

When Ian finally made it back that evening, I stepped out onto the patio and I began to tear at his clothes and kiss him aggressively because I was filled with so much anger and frustration, and I knew he’d appreciate me taking it out on him in this way. This time though, I didn’t sneak him into my bedroom and lock the door, instead I led him into my parent’s bedroom and we had the most aggressive, sloppiest, dirtiest, kinkiest, sweat pouring, mad, crazed sex we had ever had all over their bed. I didn’t know where my parents were in that house nor did I care. Afterwards I made up their bed nice and neat and as I flashed back to what had just happened, it felt like such sweet revenge. I even left them a nice little surprise under their pillow…, the condom.

The next morning when I went down to fix myself breakfast there was an envelope taped to the refrigerator with my name on it. The note inside read:

Sahona,
Your father and I discussed it and we decided that we do not want you seeing this boy outside of school. It is important that you finish this year strong. Get those college applications completed, that’s the only thing you need to think about right now. We are sure he’s a good kid but he’s not the one for you. We don’t want you around a boxer and we want you to be with someone that can equally contribute to your future household. This is our final decision. We are sure you understand that this is only in your best interest. Have a wonderful day at school. Talk to you soon.
XOXO
Mother & Father

I couldn’t rip that letter up fast enough because I felt that they had no right to judge Ian so harshly and most of all leave me a note, a rejection letter almost about someone that was so important to me and assumed that I would just comply. I made up in my mind that Ian would never be hidden from them again. I loved him, I was going to be with him and I was going to do it right in front of their faces.

From that moment on, I made it a point to make sure Ian was there whenever my parents were around. I doodled his name on their important mail, I put pictures of us around the house and whenever I would get a chance to talk to my parents, I always brought Ian up in the conversation. They always made their snobbish comments and fussed about me seeing him but it was not enough to make any type of impact on me.

One day after arriving home from school, I walked inside the house to see both of my parents standing in front of door waiting for me with huge smiles on their faces.
“Sahona, we have a big surprise for you!” Mother said as she pulled car keys from her pocket.

“You got me a car? I thought you said on graduation day, it’s still early in the year!” I yelled as I rushed to the garage and opened the door.

Tears filled my eyes as I stared at the brand new, black on black convertible Mercedes Benz Coupe with all the bells and whistles. They had even personalized the license plate with my name. It was a beautiful car but I was emotional because I could see my freedom being even closer and a lot more within my reach.
“Look in the glove compartment Sahona!” Mother said excitedly.

As I opened the glove compartment and began to read the letter that was inside, I started to scream with excitement realizing it was an acceptance letter to UCLA. I began to jump up and down in the driveway, and for once we were all so happy at the same time. I jumped into the driver’s seat to go for a test drive and before I could get off my street I had dialed Ian, “Ian! I have great news!”

“So do I, you go first.”

“Okay first I got a new car and I’m on my way over there to show it to you right now! Second baby... I got accepted to UCLA!” I screamed with excitement.

“Sahona! Congratulations! I guess I’ll see you on campus because I got accepted too!” He said excitedly.

“Are you serious?! This day can’t get any better, we get to go to school right here in California… then when we are done we can move anywhere where we want, far, far away from here. Ian I think today is the happiest day of my life.”

When I pulled into Ian’s driveway, we ran into each other’s arms. Our plan was in motion and everything was falling into place. I could see our lives becoming perfect as I had only just imagined before.


Chapter 3
A few months had past and Ian and I were driving home from school, he was driving my car and I was dancing like a wild woman to the pop song that was blasting from the stereo. We were chilling and feeling good with the top down as we approached the red light and slowly came to a stop. After a few seconds he and I nearly jumped out of our skin as we looked to the left to see my mother also stopped at the light staring at us. She didn’t say one word as she slowly pulled off with the most enraged, horrified, and disgusted look on her face.
After dropping Ian off and arriving home, I knew there would be trouble. As soon as I walked in the door my parents bombarded me with accusations of being under some sort of mind control orchestrated by Ian. I tried to defend myself and Ian but they yelled over me. I turned my back to them and was going to head to my room but my father said something that really caught my attention. He demanded, “Give me the keys to the car Sahona.”
“What?! Why?! If you don’t want Ian to drive my car then I won’t let him drive. It’s really no big deal!” I insisted.

“It’s more than that Sahona, we don’t want Ian in the car or around you. We already allowed you to see him as a friend in school but you don’t get the point. You are totally out of control regarding this boy. We tried to warn you and give you an opportunity to abide by our guidelines but you refuse and you deliberately try to rub it in our faces every chance you get, so we have no choice,” Mother said.
“Give me the keys Sahona…,” Father insisted.

I threw the keys at him and as he opened the door I broke into tears at the sight of a tow truck pulling up in front of the house. I was infuriated as I ran into my room and watched from the window as the tow truck towed my car away. Almost instantaneously my parents turned and looked up at me as I stood in the window as if they thought this scene would have some magical impact on me. However, it only made me more determined to do what I wanted to do.

Later that evening, my parents came into my bedroom and my father laid a small teddy bear on my pillow as if this was a gift that would make everything better.

“Sahona, we are so sorry that we had to do this but bad behavior must be and will be punished. The decisions you make will either bring you rich rewards or lavish regret,” Mother said.

This is just a lesson,” Father slurred.

“A lesson? Why did you have a tow truck come to take my car? You could have driven it back to the dealership or wherever you wanted to take it. You were just trying to add insult to injury,” I said with attitude.

“You are correct, that is exactly what we were trying to do. You have to feel the pain in order to learn. So yes, that was a nice little extra dramatic affect. When you have to pay for your sins Sahona, it doesn’t feel good,” Mother said as if she was teaching me a valuable lesson.

“Taking my car is not going to stop me from seeing Ian. You won’t even give him a chance.”

“Well, just know that you will have bigger consequences to face if you don’t stop seeing him. Do you want to lose everything for some stray with small aspirations? Sahona, don’t play this game with me because I can play it a hell of a lot better, trust me,” Mother assured coldly.

“I just want to go to sleep now so can you both please just leave me alone… please?” I asked almost breathless and exhausted with frustration.

“Goodnight sweetheart, your mother and I love you dearly and we won’t allow you to fail. Just don’t make this hard on yourself. You have such a bright future.”

I didn’t say another word and as soon as they closed the door behind them I threw the bear in the garbage.

When Ian snuck into my room that night, I told him what they had done and he was so angry that he cried.

“Honny, I can’t believe they did that. Just because I live in a foster home they think I’m some kind of thug. I live in the same neighborhood as you. My grades are good. Why do they hate me so much? The last time I checked, being a teacher was a commendable thing,” he said frustrated.

“I know baby… but who cares what they think, we are going to always be together. I don’t care what they think or what they say. If they knew you like I do, they would be pushing us to be together.”

“Don’t worry Honny, I’ll do whatever I need to do to get a car. I’ll do whatever it takes. Just give me a little time okay babe?”

“Well when we walk it takes longer to get home and that only means I get to spend more time with you. But…I do go through a hell of a lot more shoes walking so maybe you should work on that car!” I laughed.

Ian held me all night and neither one of us slept at all. We were both quiet and still as if we didn’t want to disturb the other. I couldn’t fall asleep because he was awake and I could tell he was in deep thought yet he still found a way to make me feel so safe and comfortable in his arms.

A couple weeks passed and despite my parents warning me to stop seeing Ian, he and I were closer than ever. They really couldn’t forbid me to do anything if they had no way of controlling or knowing what I did. I missed the car but I didn’t love it as much as Ian.
Actually, I had got used to walking home again until one day the roar of an engine caught my attention and seconds later a classic electric blue 1966 Chevrolet Impala convertible pulled up slowing beside me. As I focused my eyes, I was elated to see that Ian was behind the wheel of this jaw-dropping car. Everything was brand new and shiny on it from the wheels and rims to the cream and blue interior leather seats.

“Ian this is beautiful! Where…how did you get this?” I asked as I jumped in.

“This is my dad’s car, my grandfather and I have been working on it forever. There was one final part it needed… an engine, but I didn’t have the money to get it. But now we are rolling again baby!”

Noticing Ian had a vicious black eye, I asked, “Ian, how did you get the money and what happened to your eye?”

“My eye, oh nothing… just something that happened in a little fight, no big deal. So you like the car?”

“Ian, don’t lie to me or try to change the subject. We talk about everything are you going to start lying to me now?”

“Alright look, I fought for the money to fix the car okay. I got a black eye but obviously I won the fight. I told you I was going to get us another car and I had to do what I had to do.”

“You get paid to fight at the rec?”

“No Honny, an underground fight, a fight club okay? I’m fine, we needed another car. I mean we’ll be away at college soon so how do you expect us to get around? I had to do it. Besides, you should see the other guy!” He laughed.

“Ian, thank you, thank you so much. I love you so much, I really do. But I don’t want you fighting, especially underground fights. Those are so dangerous and we can figure something out to do what we need to do. If something ever happened to you or you got really hurt, you’d leave me all alone and I don’t ever want to be without you, okay?”

“Okay Honny, Okay...”

“Promise me!”

“I promise… I promise mommy! Gosh!” He laughed.

“How fast can this thing go Ian?”

“Ah shit! Are you ready baby?”

Ian threw that car into gear and we took off. He loved that car not just because it was really nice but because it belonged to his father and since his grandfather was becoming weaker from old age, he also cherished the memories they had working on it together.
Driving around with the top down speeding down some isolated road made me feel so free. I would stand up and let my hair fly through the air and laugh so hard. I always felt free with Ian no matter what we were doing. It seemed as if in Ian’s world nothing mattered but me, our future and that bad ass Impala.

Graduation seemed to be approaching quickly and we were almost at the finish line. However, things changed dramatically one morning as Ian and I laid naked and cuddled in my bed together. I obviously had forgotten to turn on the alarm clock because we slept well past the time we would normally wake up. We were suddenly awaken by the eerie and horrified gasp for air and the sound of my mother screeching my name as she stood in my bedroom doorway. She nearly fell as she turned to run out of my bedroom.

Ian and I quickly got dressed and we rushed out of the bedroom to confront my parents that were in the living room. My father was consoling my mother as we approached and as soon as he saw me, his eyes got beady and his jaw quivered in anger.

“Mother, Father, I’m sorry. I don’t know what else to say,” I shouted in shame.

“How dare you come into my house and sleep with my daughter! I should… I don’t even know what I should do! I don’t know whether to get my gun or call the police,” Father said as he paced the floor.

Knowing my father was drunk and very well capable of grabbing his gun, I said, “Ian you should just leave.”

“No, let the son of a bitch stay! Well that’s not a fitting description now is it? You are the son of nobody! Anyway, Honny, Honny, he needs to hear this,” Mother said in a crazy deranged half whisper, “You have a choice my dear…You tell him right now that you will never ever see him again.”

“Mother, I know it was totally disrespectful to have him here and I am so sorry… but… but I will not stop seeing him,” I said humbly.

“Oh no… you will. Let me think… hmmm it’s too late in the year to transfer you to another school… hmmmm… I got it… If you don’t tell him that right now, we won’t pay for you to go to college.”

“Mr. & Mrs. Story… Please I’m a good guy, I love Sahona. I want to marry her. I will marry her right now if you are worried about me mistreating her or…

“Marry her...?” Mother interrupted, “That will never happen!” She said turning her nose up as if she was looking down on him. “Sahona tell him now!” She screamed belligerently.

“I will marry him… Mother I love him.”

“You tell him now or not only will we not pay for college but we will totally cut you off completely! If I turn my back on you Sahona Angel Story, you will never be allowed back in this house again ever! You will not defy me! You will do as I say! When I say it! Now tell him!” She demanded.

Those words stung me to my very soul and I said and did something that I had never said or done before. I dropped to my knees and at my mother’s feet I said in almost a whisper, “Mommy, please… Don’t say that, please take that back… please don’t ever say that. Mommy… please…” I begged and pleaded as my voice quivered in sadness.

She continued to stare at me cold and heartless. I reached both my hands out to my father barely able to see him through my tears, “Daddy…?” I asked if I was giving him a chance to rescue me from that curse.

“Sahona you heard your mother, make your choice,” he said as he turned his back to me.

I couldn’t do anything but cry, the pain was so overwhelming and it was something I had never felt in my entire life. My mother stood above me, looking down at me with tears in her eyes that she managed to hold back from falling and said, “If you make the wrong choice Sahona, leave with the clothes on your back, nothing else. You will pay for your sins,” she said turning her back to me.
I was still paralyzed with pain and couldn’t move, I couldn’t speak, I couldn’t do anything from being in shock of what was happening. After what felt like an eternity of me being on the floor on my knees, crying with my parents backs to me, I felt a warm, loving, soft hand brush the tears from my face and as Ian kneeled beside me he said softly but with confidence, “It’s going to be okay Honny, baby I will take care of you.”

He stood up and reached his hand out to me, he looked like an angel standing in the slight bit of sunlight shinning thru the crack in the drapes, but I still couldn’t move since I was so overwhelmed. Realizing that, he then he picked me up and cradled me like a baby and carried me out of the house. I don’t know if I had imagined hearing my mother scream out my name one last time as if she had realized her lesson had gone too far but all I could think of was her and my father turning their backs to me, and now it was too late, it was said… it was done.

Impressum

Tag der Veröffentlichung: 18.11.2010

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