Chapter one - Steph

Ring Ring 

My phone sang its usual melody. I never got used to this ringtone. Every single time, I nearly tumbled off my bed when it rang. My eyes half opened, wishing I could hit whoever had dared disturb my peaceful slumber. My hands beat the bed rest searching for my phone. 

Without checking the caller ID, I stuck the phone to my ear.

“Hello,” I groggily whispered, using my left hand to fetch my glasses from my other pillow. I know what you're probably thinking. I'd crash it, but I don't sleep on that pillow. Maybe I was the only person who had extra pillows on my bed and always used one. Not all three or four, just one. 

“Hello, honey. How are you?” My mom's lovely birdy voice slipped through my ears. 

“Mom,” I said, opening and shutting my eyes to clear the blurriness in my eyes. Like that helped. I'd only been away three days, and my doting mother wouldn't give me the space I needed. “I'm fine, and you.”

“We're also good, darling. How's Spain?” She asked, humming one of her favorite tunes. 

“You’ve asked me that already. In fact, you've been asking me that question for the past three days. Spain is fine.” I said in a bored tone. 

“Yeah, you keep giving me that response, Steph, and I'll keep asking. How's Spain? I need details, honey.” She pressed on.

I sighed, lolling on the bedpost and rubbing my forehead. I stared at the ceiling. My vision was still blurry. Momentarily, I slipped off the glasses, cleaned it with a tiny piece of my comforter, and slipped it back on. Blurry, still. The urge to burst into tears strangled me. But no, I had to be strong. I couldn't let this mishap tear me apart all the time. It'd been a year, Stephanie. Get over it. “The truth is, mom, I haven’t really gotten the chance to do anything.”

“It's that bad? Honey, I'm so sorry.” She whimpered, and I could hear the soft muffles of tears in her voice. 

“Mom, it's not your fault. The whole point of this vacation was for me to relax. I've had a tough year. And we did agree that when my singing career takes off, I'll take this trip so… it’s finally happening.”

“I know, but when we made that plan, honey, you still had your vision. And now,” She sniffed, and I imagined her wiping her face with the back of her hand.

“I'm not blind, mom,” I said through gritted teeth. One tragedy hit you, and everyone treated you like a porcelain doll. People expected you to be special, and I had, I think. “Yes, I'm having problems seeing clearly, but I'm not blind.” Even as I said those words, my voice croaked. The months of wearing this unwavering charade had slowly waned off. The minute it did, I packed my bags in the name of vacation. My debut album was a huge success. You could say that losing- being visually impaired opened a soft spot in people to accept my music. After all, every time I watched those talent shows, it was the kids who overcame cancer that got the golden buzzers. For a while, I believed it was my misfortune that bred my success, but I realized it wasn't. The songs I wrote encouraged me to never give up, and it felt good that it always encouraged others with similar challenges.

“I'll never forgive that driver.” She snarled, and I heard a crack.

“What was that?” I asked, ignoring her feathery threat.

“Nothing. Never mind, honey. If you're not feeling it in Spain, you could always come home, you know.”

“No, mom. I'm not. I'm taking this month break. I could get some new inspiration and write more songs.”

“Don't stress yourself, honey.”

“I'm not.” I let out, and tears eked out, causing complete blindness in my vision. I blinked as the tear fell on my cheek. “It's overwhelming, mom. I understand that everything happens for a reason. I'm happy with the fact that Atlantic Records wants to sign me. I'm happy with the boost in my Instagram followers. How my music has become a pop sensation, but why did it happen after the accident. Why did this awful thing have to be the road to my musical success?” I never understood this. Of course, my therapist counseled me on it. Bad things don't stay forever, and they happen to allow good things to follow. But it didn't make sense to me. Every day, my sight got worse. And it scared me that sooner or later, that spark of motivation would burn out, replaced by flames of sadness. Then my inspirational songs would turn into albums and albums of elegies and melancholic ballads. My fans would hate me. I'd hate myself too, and I'd be miserable. Forever. 

“Honey, I get you. I get your pain too. But believe me, things will get better. You're the strongest person I know, and I'm so glad millions and millions of people see that too. It's not all downsides, honey. In a way, it was also a stroke of luck. Do you know the number of people you've inspired? Have you read the life-changing stories people have shared ever since your album came out? You're part of the few lucky ones, and you're inspiring others.” 

“I love you, mom,” I whispered. I always hated her calls until she started with her pep talk. 

“I love you more, sweetheart. But honestly, I'm going to kill that driver.”

“He died, mom.”

“Exactly, but you were left alive to come inspire others.”

“Yeah, I escaped death, lost my vision, and became a popstar.” The sarcasm failed to come out.

“Damn! What an inspirational story for when you give a speech in Harvard few years to come.” She cheered.

“Mom. Harvard is for the big personalities.”

“Yes, and you are one, my darling. You are a big personality. Never forget that.”

“I won't. I want to go to the beach now. Told one of the hotel attendants to come get me at four. So, I'd like to get ready.”

“Sure. You have all the fun, honey. Be careful, and if you will, bring a husband from Spain.”

“Mom. Bye.” I said, rolling my eyes.

“Bye, baby.” She laughed.

The call ended, and I donned a swimsuit, but not before adding a few eye drops in my eye. It decreased the blurriness,

Impressum

Verlag: BookRix GmbH & Co. KG

Cover: Germancreative
Übersetzung: Sharela Koch
Tag der Veröffentlichung: 20.05.2022
ISBN: 978-3-7554-1430-8

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