Prologue

When I set out that day with my two best friends, I had no idea the events that would unfold before me. I didn’t know about the tragedy I would face, or, of the life changing decisions I would make. I was just a kid trying to enjoy some of her last days of freedom. Of course, I’m getting ahead of myself; let me give you some background.


Prologue

My name is Gianna Jacobs, the year is 4026, and I live in an underground civilization called Nucleo. How far underground you ask? About 3,954 miles from the earth’s crust. For those very intelligent people out there; congratulations, you are correct, I live in the earth’s inner core. Now depending on who is reading this and what time period you are from, you may be thinking; What the hell? Is she impervious to flame?

The answer to that is: of course not, who the freak do you think I am? One of the Fantastic Four? The core cooling is old news. How old? About two-thousand years give or take.

It all started in 2012. This crazy scientist, Sean De Laurre, created a new kind of bomb. It was unlike anything that had ever even been thought about. The bomb didn’t actually explode, it gave off invisible and disastrous waves that had the ability to shake the entire earth. Stupid, right? Kind of like the atomic bomb. Why invent that kind of power anyway?!

You wouldn’t believe the reaction of the public when the media got wind of it. Shit literally hit the fan. There were riots, and raves. Crime stats hit an all time high. The world was falling apart, and the bomb hadn’t even been used yet! People have a way of focusing on the small unimportant details.

One of the mobs was led by a man named John Gieser. An ignorant leader to lead ignorant people. What could go wrong? A lot, as it turned out. See, John wasn’t happy with protesting and waving signs. Nope, he had to step it up a notch; breaking and entering. Where? Oh, just Laurre’s private laboratory, where he just happened to keep his new invention. No big deal, right? Ha!

They broke in, proceeded to trash the place and while they were doing that, one of the idiots detonated the bomb. It’s people like them that make me Pro-Choice.

As you can imagine; it was awful. The entire world convulsed uncontrollably for days, before they could turn it off. Hundreds of thousands of people died and millions were injured. It was the greatest disaster in the history of the galaxy.

When they finally did turn it off, the damage was irreversible. I’m not talking about the cities in ruins, or the lives lost, or the records of the past that were lost forever. This was much bigger; deep in the core, things were going ballistic. Not to get too technical; the protons, neutrons, and such were splitting in half like maniacs. This made the radioactive atoms even more unstable and causing their half lives to decrease drastically. Basically what should have taken billions of years was done in a thousand. By approximately the year 3000 the inner core was room temperature.

Now, if you have a basic high school level knowledge of science, you know we don’t get our heat from the core, but from the sun. No big change there. Unfortunately, the heat from the center of the earth does do something pretty important for us. Two words; Magnetic field. Or more commonly known as the force-that-keeps-crap-from-falling-on-us-from-outer-space.

Now it didn’t completely disappear, but it no longer kept rocks from raining on the people of earth.
Our population continued to decline. The great minds of that generation got together and created a compromise; live underground. Simple, but effective. They started construction within the week. It wasn’t hard, we already had the technology to get the job done cleanly and quickly.

That’s about when this strange group of meteors landed all over the world. They contained a new chemical that later became known as Kytec. It was completely new to the earth and completely radioactive.

Anyone who came into contact with it, or came into contact with someone who had, was infected. At first we thought it was simply a virus, and in a way, it was. The people started to morph in horrible ways. But more importantly, they advanced. Their movements increased to speeds that had once been thought humanly impossible. This wasn’t the only development; they became stronger, as in Superman, stronger. The Kytec also made it harder for them to be killed; someone infected jumped from the thirty story building and lived. Sure, a gun shot to the heart would still do the trick, but only if left untreated. A professor later remarked that they were becoming the perfect predator.

The digging kept going through all this chaos, and for a time we lived in an uncomfortable truce. No one really knew what to make of them, at first. But, eventually, instincts took over, and fear settled in. They were animals, evil creatures, that would see us all dead the moment we turned our backs.
That’s when disaster struck, in the form of a twenty-two year old named Jenny Hinderson. Or as her coworkers down at the local strip-joint called her; Ginger Snap. She was the lowest form of woman that was still uninfected. Respectable people avoided her like she was the Plague, that is, until she was ‘attacked’.

Now, since I wasn’t actually there, I can’t tell you exactly what happened...but I can get pretty damn close. Ginger was walking home from her job as a pole-whore, I mean dancer, when she ran into Lance Yoburg; an infected young male. The way the media tells it, what happened next was completely his fault and that he sexually assaulted a young innocent woman.

It was like the Scottsboro Boys all over again, only on a much larger scale. By the next morning the world knew, and were outraged. The infected people because they believed that Lance had been falsely accused. The normal humans saw it as an attack on the whole population, an act of war, and that was it for trying to play nice. A full-blown war broke out, with the uninfected greatly out numbered; three to one. Not to mention the fact that they were basically fighting super heroes.

Miraculously, we managed to hold our own until construction was finished and the core was pronounced ‘safe to inhabit’. With out ever really declaring an end to the long war, we retreated into Nucleo; the name of our new world, and shut the infected population out for good.

A millennium later, we’re completely settled. No one has any delusions about returning to the crust, who would want to anyway? We have everything we need to survive and thrive. Here we are safe. Here we are at home.

Less than a fourth of the earth’s original population came down into the core. With so little people we banded together to form one large society. We all serve under one family, a monarchy of sorts, the Everetts.

They came into power long before the meteors fell, and after all this time, it just felt normal to look to them for guidance. Sure, they weren’t the only ones in charge. There were always powerful families that got their say, but the Everetts’ word was law; literally.

So, life went on in the core, and apart from the small bits of radiation, which was easily fixed by our Skin Suit, it was perfectly perfect. That is, until we imploded utopia.

Chapter One: To The Crust

Not for the first time that evening I found my eyes roaming to the digital clock on the wall. 7:35 pm; just five more minutes left of this torture.

“As I was saying, I am the direct reason for the doubling of sales in my department...”

I resisted the urge to roll my eyes at my handsome ‘date’. The handsome part was true enough, I thought as I gazed at his sharp jaw and beautiful complexion, but I couldn’t really call him my date. Dating involved something consensual, and if it weren’t for my father, I wouldn’t be here.

Pretending to listen, I played absently with my Skin Suit, full body under armor made of stretchy radiation proof material. It was mandatory to wear it all times, except when inside one’s own home. Mentally I tried to scold myself into paying attention to him. It’s only the rest of my life.
Glancing up into his grey eyes, I couldn’t imagine marrying him. I didn’t know him, he didn’t know me. But it was happening, whether I liked it or not. Control was something I thrived on, and being without it was like a sharp slap in the face. In reality, I did have a choice. I could leave my family and never look back. Right, like that ever works out.

My watch went off, signaling that it was time to leave. I sprang to my feet and nodded my head at Walter Jones, and tried to keep the disgust out of my face.

“I apologize for having to cut this short but-”

He smiled, “No, I understand. I’m sure you’re in a big hurry to take off with your friends.”
I waved awkwardly at him, and then exited the restaurant. It was completely pitch black out, apart from the few street lights, and the weather was perfect. Then again, living in the core, we don’t exactly get real weather. The glass dome that covered our entire civilization was the only reason we saw a change in time of day, and even that was electronic.

As soon as I was safely in the shadows where the street lamps no longer illuminated my path, I took off. My legs became a blur beneath me and I reached speeds that I wasn’t aware I could. Off in the distance I heard an Enforcer call out to me, telling me to slow down or he’d have to report it.

Without bothering to slow down a laughed at him, “Yes, sir, Mr. Policeman, sir.”

It was really a stupid joke, Enforcers hadn’t been called the police or the armed forces in eons. But what can I say? I’m a history buff.

It was all so surreal, I couldn’t believe the day had finally come. The Last Summer. Come fall it’d be all over, no more school, no more grades, and...no more Koen or Cedric. It was a bitter sweet moment, on one hand, I was dying to spend two whole months with just my friends. On the other, as soon as it was over, I’d be getting married, Koen would be starting his computer skills training, and Cedric would spend eight years learning to fight and lead the nation. Sure, it wasn’t like Cedric and I wouldn’t see each other at important social events, and Koen and I at the market, just as we have our whole lives. It was different this time. We would no longer be children. It would no longer be considered cute that Cedric, the future ruler of all of Nucleo, was friends with Koen, nothing more than a commoner. Barbaric, right?
There would be no more us. All the time we’d spent together, all the shared secrets, all the mutual pain, would be gone. Vanished, like it never existed, like it never mattered.

When I hit the woods I slowed to a walk. The teachers all say it was extremely hard to breed a type of tree that didn’t need sunlight. I can imagine. The ‘trees’ shown an eerie silver. Though it was their normal color, it still unnerved me. I’d known nothing else, but it always seemed...wrong...
My pace quickened as I got closer to my destination.

Am I ready for this? It’ll all be over so soon...

I squared my shoulders against the traitorous words. Who was I? Some soft-hearted young lady? No, against all the odds, I wasn’t like my step-mother, my sister, or any other girl I’d ever met. Smiling to myself at my small accomplishment, I fought my way through the peculiarly colored bushes. As per usual the plant needles left sticky scratches on my face and hands, the only exposed parts of my body. I didn’t notice. Peering into the clearing I realized my friends had beaten me there. Must have taken longer than I thought...

Cedric was pacing back and forth in a seemingly calm manner, but I knew him better than that. He was excited as a kid on the last day of school. His dark ebony skin blended into the dark shadows of the forest. He had always struck me as a very handsome individual, with warm brown eyes, strong facial features, and six feet of pure muscle. He embodied confidence, strength, and pose. The girls certainly went crazy over him. Cedric’s only physical flaw, in my eyes, was his constant lack of hair. Like most of the boys our age; he shaved it down so it stuck out less than a centimeter from his scalp. It wasn’t unattractive, just not to my tastes.

Koen, on the other hand, was Cedric’s exact opposite; he was sprawled out on the ground, lazily stretching his lean body. He was at least three inches taller than Cedric, and had a lanky build. His extremely pale skin was almost luminous in the dark, and created a great contrast with his carrot colored hair that fell carelessly into his eyes. His eyes... the most extraordinary thing about him by far, his nose was too large for good looks, and his freckles made him seem young. But, Koen’s irises were magical pools of liquid gold that could entrance anyone with one glance. That is, if he ever moved them away from his computer screen.

“Do you losers really have nothing better to do than to wait on me?” I sneered, as I emerged from the gloom. Koen jumped in surprise, but Cedric just frowned at me like he known where I was the whole time. Damn, him and his weird heightened senses. At least I could still get Koen.

“It wouldn’t be necessary to wait if you didn’t keep us waiting,” Cedric snarled.

“Walter and I had a date,” I said off-offhandedly, like it was no big deal. My two friends exchanged a look full of worry and resentment. I could always count on my boys to take my side, even if there was no battle to be won.

“How’d it...go?” Koen asked cautiously.

“I don’t wanna talk about him,” I whispered. “Can we just make a promise that for the next two months we don’t talk about any of it? Not battle school, or tech training, or any of that stuff.”

“Do you think that will help?” Cedric inquired with a wisdom not common in a boy of seventeen.

For awhile, I thought, which was all I really needed. Who cared about after...the upcoming events? It’d all be over, my life, my freedom, everything. My fate was sealed like every single girl my age with a family that had a social standing like mine.

I couldn’t believe I was making such a big fuss over this. After all, it wasn’t like this was the first time my father had ‘pimped me out’.

Are you sure you won’t have any more wine? It’s amazing for the nerves.

Shuddering, I pushed back the nightmares. It could all be taken care of at a later time. This was my last few months with my friends, and I planned to use it.

Koen coughed, breaking me from the binds of my mind, “ Should we get moving? It’s going to be a long trip.”

Shaking off the last of my insecurities, I felt somewhat like my usual self. “You’re right, it is going to be a long trip...over rough, unyielding terrain... That reminds me, which one of you morons gets the honor of carrying me?” After waiting a few seconds I continued. “Don’t all volunteer at once, you can take turns.”

Grinning, Koen threw his arm over my shoulder, squeezing me roughly. It was surprisingly comforting. He towered above me, even at my abnormally tall height of 5’ 11”.

“Don’t worry, Short-stack, I have faith you can keep up with us.”

“And if you can’t, we’ll leave you in the dust,” Cedric chuckled on my left, as we made our way east.
“Oh, you’ll come back. Can you imagine your life without me?” I boasted pridefully.

“Frequently,” Koen said dreamily. Both of them burst out laughing at my sullen expression. Let them laugh, I’ll get my revenge; I always do.

Releasing my shoulder, Koen captured my right hand, and Cedric my left. Both of their hands were large enough to swallow mine whole. Cedric’s was wide and calloused, Koen’s slender and lithe with rough tips from constant typing. It brought back all the memories of our childhood together, and it was one of the few moments in my life when I felt true happiness.

We walked in silence, and my mind wandered. Mostly I thought of where we were going, and the danger we were risking. I didn’t feel any fear, what could happen when we were all together?


Flashback:

Two years in the past

“Koen! Wait up!” I called to the receding figure in front of me. He’d had another growth spurt and I was at sore disadvantage.

“Come on, Gia, your faster than you look.” Cedric called from his side.

“Well, excuse me, for not having ten foot long legs!” Reaching their destination; a deserted park not far from the Royal Palace, they slowed to a walk.

“Only two years left,” Cedric stated coolly. We all sat down in a triangle, not daring to meet each others eyes. We’d only been fifteen, but already we were well acquainted with bitter resentment. I often wish I could go back and talk to myself. Would things have turned out differently if I told my fifteen-year-old-self just how fast the next two years would fly? One blink, and they were gone forever. What if I told her to treasure the two living beings that sat next to her? If I told her just how much they’d come to mean to her, would she listen?

“We need to do something...big. Something we’ll remember for the rest of our lives, ya know?” I said with determination.

Cedric’s eyes glinted with imagination and I smiled encouragingly at him. He always came up with the best ideas. That boy had adventure imprinted on his very soul.

“I was thinking about it; security is pretty lax during the summer. We could sneak into the-"

“Oh, here we go!” He glared at us accusingly, “I swear you’ll be the death of me! Give it up, we’ll never see the crust-”

“Be quiet! Do you want everyone to hear you?” I hissed, putting my hand over his mouth.

He mumbled something that sounded like, “Crazy...probably get us all killed...or worse,” into my skin.

“Maybe it is crazy, but don’t you think we deserve a little irresponsible fun? Before we know it, you’ll be off to training, I’ll be attending battle school, and Gianna...” Cedric cut off and glanced down at his feet. Koen had a similar reaction. It was in that moment that I realized my friends knew more about what was to be my future than they had let on. I took my hand from his mouth.

We sat in silence for a few minutes before I broke it, “I think it’s a great idea, it’s exactly what I want to do with my last few months of freedom.” They both stared at me for a second.

Koen cleared his throat, “Then it’s settled; two years from now we’ll head up.”

“3,954 miles up, to be exact,” I chuckled.

“To the earth’s crust.” Cedric’s tone was sure and unwavering, just like the man he would become.

Chapter Two: Figure of Dark

Everything ached. My legs, arms, and anything else attached to my torso. I had scrapes all over my hands and a few on my face from when my natural grace had landed me flat on my ass. Koen hadn’t fared much better. He’d just gone through yet another growth-spurt and was still a little awkward. I was beginning to wonder if he’d ever stop. Cedric, on the other hand, had managed to keep his balance, thanks to all of his strenuous warrior training.
My foot sunk deep into a mud pile that I failed to see until the moment it consumed me up to my calf. I froze, staring down at my mud encased Activity Boot, I started to wipe some of the gunk off on the grass.
“Typical! Stupid, forest. . .nature,” I grumbled to myself.
“What’s the hold up, Jacobs?” Cedric called back to me from a few yards ahead.
“Nothing!” I answered, not wanting to waste anymore time than I already had. I ran to catch up with them.
“How much farther?” Koen turned to Cedric.
Ced had a calculating kind of look on his face, “It should be right around here.”
“Then maybe we shouldn’t be making this much noise,” I whispered. They both nodded their agreement. If Cedric thought we were close that was all the convincing I needed to shut my mouth. The whole area was supposed to be overflowing with Enforcers, any of them could be listening to our conversation, waiting for the perfect moment to pop out and arrest us for trespassing. Sure, the charges would be dropped immediately due to Cedric’s involvement, but that would be it for our dreams of reaching the crust.
You’re probably wondering what’s the big deal about being top-side, and to this day I’m not completely sure why it was so important to us. It consumed our every thought. I think it was about escaping...eluding captivity. The very idea of a place where we could be ourselves, where we could be together, without the judgment and misunderstandings, was more than we could hope for. The crust was a symbol of freedom, to an extent.
Our plan was riddled through with flaws; getting past security, surviving the harsh environmental changes, and above all else, the monsters that inhabited the ruins of our old civilization. But we didn’t like to think about that, it was all too sketchy. First of all, no one had seen an Infected in over a thousand years. Who was to say they weren’t extinct? And if they weren’t, it wasn’t like we didn’t have a plan. Run like hell usually does the trick.
Then there was the Enforcer army surrounding us, we only knew what the government chose to tell us, and no one was allowed in this part of the woods. For all we knew, there were no Enforcers and Area Six was sealed off by threat alone.
Yes, Area Six, you heard correctly. I have no idea if that’s the government’s name for the two mile radius around The Shoot or if civilians came up with it. And, yes, I know that the number six is suppose to invoke the devil. I’m not without sin, so I figure Lucifer and I will get along famously.
If you have a normal functioning brain you’re thinking; Excuse me? Back up a minute... ‘The Shoot’? Or something along those lines. Well, you’re out of luck, because it’s not a socially acceptable conversation topic. . .
Just kidding, can you imagine if I was like that? The Shoot is basically an elevator on steroids. The ‘elevator’ reaches speeds of 2,000 miles per hour, which means it would take under two minutes to get from the launch pad to the surface. Two whole minutes of chewing our nails and being jolted around at high speeds. Good times. . .  
But, I’m getting ahead of myself, first I have to get past the bouncers. Something tells me they’re not going to just buckle us in and wish the crazy kids a merry trip. . .not of their own free will anyway.
Cedric motioned for us to stop and we knelt down around each other in a triangle formation. Koen and Cedric took turns eying me, probably wondering if I was going to chicken-out on them. If I’m being reasonable, there’s no point in resenting their feelings towards me. It’s just the way things were; women took a secondary role and men had the lead part. They were raised to believe in those values. . .But who am I kidding? I’ve never been reasonable.
“We’re too noisy as a whole. Someone needs to scout ahead, while the other two wait here.” Cedric whispered in a confident tone that left no doubt on who he thought should go and stay. Self-absorbed soldiers...
“Good idea-” Koen nodded his head.
“I’ll go.” Cedric and I stated simultaneously. His head snapped towards me, and our eyes met in an unspoken challenge.
“There is no way you’re going out there alone, so just forget about it, Gianna. Besides, it was my idea.” He growled at me.
“Oh, grow up. I’m lighter and shorter than both of you. I can sneak around. Therefor, I’m the logical decision.”
His mouth turned up in an annoying smirk, “Maybe, that would be the case if you actually walk the length of your room without tripping over yourself. I’ve been specially trained for Recon missions and-”
“Oh, here we go! I am so sick of your ‘warrior prince’ crap. Just because I have ovaries doesn’t mean I can’t tip-toe around places and hit people with a stick.”  
“It is not a stick. It’s called a Brashnel. It’s triple edged long sword used for one-on-one combat.” Cedric breathed heatedly.
“Yeah, it’s a stick.”
“SHUT UP!” Koen rumbled, “If neither of you can be mature about this. . . I’ll go.” I locked gazes with his beautiful golden orbs, I was nowhere near ready to give up this battle. If a girl wanted something, she had to go get it. No one was going to hand me shit, and that was just fine with me. Freedom was worth it, even if it meant fighting with my prideful, strong-willed best friend.
I was prepared to get physical if need be. As it turned out that wasn’t necessary, because not for the first, nor the last time in my life, I found my choice being taken right from under me.     
Cedric nodded slowly and reluctantly, “Alright. . . I’ll wait here with Gia.”
I couldn’t believe what I was hearing, had they forgotten I was even there? I looked back and forth between the two, both wore similar expressions of determination and stubborn dignity. My opinion meant nothing.
I wasn’t going to win, the realization hit me hard, like a ton of bricks. You’d think I’d be use to men ruling my life, but it still sucks to this day.
Turning away from them, I made my way over to a large ‘tree’ and sunk into a sitting position. Who said pouting was a waste of time? I decided to use silence as a guilt inflicting weapon, while I planned my revenge. Push them in the mud? No, too small. ‘Accidentally’ trip near a cliff? Maybe, a tad over kill. . . Emphasis on the ‘kill’. Squish, crunch, snap.
Of course, I’d want to wait to act until we reached our destination, wouldn’t want an injury to screw up our chances. Plus, if I waited, I’d have the element of surprise. I continued to submerge myself in my plans of retribution, so thoroughly in fact, that when I came out of it Koen was already gone. . . And so was Cedric.

“Dad?” My voice echoed through the empty halls, “Is anyone home?” The silence was deafening. My house had never been quiet. Leina, my spastic younger sister, was always around to cause trouble and infinite noise. She’d gone away to a camp that summer. She was so excited that she’d finally turned eight, and that Dad had agreed to her spending a whole two months away from home. Having turned eight over four years before, and already having had my ‘big camp adventure’, I didn’t see the attraction.  
I walked slowly down the corridor, unable to shake my feelings of unease. Something was wrong. The usually bright, vibrant paintings seemed dull, sinister. The faces of my ancestors stared down at me with mixed expressions of shame and disregard. Every Jacob for the past two hundred years had their face in this hall. Well, almost every Jacob . . . .
“. . . Jenifer? Are you there?” She’d never requested that I call her Mom, quite the opposite, in fact. She made it clear she couldn’t stand me. Not in front of my father, of course, never in front of father. I didn’t blame him then, for remarrying someone who did not and would not love me. I’d never known a mother’s love, and you can’t miss what you never had.
I wondered constantly what things would be like if my mother were still alive. True, Leina, being only my half sister, would have never been born. That fact right there was enough to stop most of my day dreams, but still, occasionally I thought of what it would have been like to meet her. . . to see her face with my own eyes.
A crash sounded from directly above me, I stared at the ceiling in morbid fascination. A woman screamed, only to be cut off suddenly, and followed by a muffled gagging.
Another woman, her voice held much more cruelty than the first, laughed venomously, “Are you up for round two, sweetheart? He loves it when you scream. . .”

I started running, running from the memories, from the nightmares. . . from him. My erratic mind threatened to push me back over the edge of sanity, right into his clutches. I couldn’t go back there. I wouldn’t survive it a second time. I’d shatter into a million fragments, and even if they tried to put the shards back together, they’d never find all of me.
My breaths came out in shallow pants, I didn’t know how far I’d gone. It seemed like only minutes. . . the longest minutes of my young life.
The next few minutes passed in a blur. I remember the feeling of dread as my foot caught on a thick root protruding from the ground. I tried to twist mid-air, to no avail. I went down. Hard. My forehead smashed into the tightly compacted soil.
I gasped at the searing pain in my right ankle, the one that had gotten caught. That was definitely going to hurt in the morning, and the morning after that, and the morning after that. . . .
Turning over slowly, so as not to further aggravate the sprain/possible break, I settled into a sitting position. This is just perfect, I thought. I’m alone in the middle of a heavily wooded area that I’m not familiar with. I have no supplies, and my knights in shinning armor are either missing, or off ambushing an army. . .without backup. No one can ever say my life is without excitement.
Turning my head ever so slightly, movement caught my attention. A silhouette outlined in the aesthetic moonlight.  A massive, petrifying contour. . . creeping ever closer.
I struggled frantically to my feet, my entire being vibrating in fear. Would he never truly leave me? Was I doomed to feel his presence for the rest of my inconsequential existence? I was cold, so very cold. Everything seemed to be happening at supernatural speeds, I couldn’t keep up. I didn’t try to.
The pain in my ankle flared out, it was worse than I could of imagined, it couldn’t hold my weight. I staggered for a moment before crashing to my knees. The agony enveloped me, carving a path of destruction in my mind and heart.
The figure was upon me, so close I couldn’t touch him, if I dared. I opened my mouth to scream, a desperate attempt at self preservation. My instincts didn’t care that both Koen and Cedric were too far away to save me at this point, even if they heard my shrieks.
The man’s hand clasped around my mouth, before I could so much as squeak, cutting off my last chance of survival. I couldn’t run. I wasn’t strong enough to fight him, even at full strength.
My arms flailed out, trying against hope to disable my attacker. I started to panic, I lost the ability to breathe. My body spasmed in response, my vision began to blur. His hand was warm, calloused, and well used. Part of me realized that the ghost of my past had had clammy hands, always moving, always touching. These weren’t the same hands. It was the same part of my mind that recognized that he had only covered my mouth, not my nose. This part was quickly buried under mountains of hurt and pain.
I started to go limp in his arms. I wanted to fight this. Fight the darkness that was slowly pushing it’s way through my anatomy. The truth of it was that I didn’t have any fight left. I was tired. Tired of battling everyone and everything just for a little ground, a little space. Would it really be so wrong to just let go? Just for a moment?
The hand was immediately retracted, just seconds after it’d been placed, it didn’t matter. Nothing mattered. I felt myself being gently lowered to the ground, all the while still in his embrace. He was cradling me, for what reason I couldn’t fathom. My eyes found the deep, magenta colored ‘sky’, it’s stars far too perfect in their placement to be real. A face entered my perception as he leaned over me. The hard lines of his jaw, the kind, merciless brown, and dark chocolate skin so familiar. I knew this face. Didn’t I?
His lips moved, I was engrossed by it, but I had no hope of hearing his voice over the roaring in my ears.  I smiled as I stretched out my arm and stroked the rugged aspects of his features, they were set grimness. His skin was like fire under my frigid touch. A shiver ran it’s way up his spine and he captured my exploring fingers in his over sized hand.
I met his terrified eyes. He looked so angry, so full of dread and dismay. I opened my mouth to question him about it. What had this man so paralyzed with such pure, unkempt  panic? But instead, a gasp forced it’s way past my lips, and I was shoved under the thick blankets of unconsciousness.

* * *

I was at peace. Everything was so warm, so safe. Nothing could hurt me here. . . Almost nothing.
“He loves it when you scream...” Her sadistic laugh cut off suddenly, “It appears we have an audience. Come here, sweetheart, come and play.”
No! It was my currently mental voice that screamed out. I couldn’t remember. I couldn’t back there. Back to that room full of pain, and sick pleasure. I’d escaped it once, and I couldn’t do it a second time. Despite my best attempts the horror threatened to pull me with it.
“Come here, sweetheart, come and play.”
“Gia,” someone whispered from just outside my mind. It shocked me from her clutches, because while he was bad, she was worse. The only difference was that while she tormented her psyche, he controlled the corporeal realm. He was easier to run from. How do you fight monstrosities that live only in your head?
“Sweetheart-” Her voice practically bled evil, contempt, and bad intentions.  
“Gianna, please. Please wake up. You have to wake up!” The words were filled with such hurt, desperation, and fear, that it punctured my nightmares instantly. But they would return, they never left her, and they never would.
My eyes flickered open, the ‘sky’ was even darker than I remembered, which made me think I’d been out for a couple of hours. I was laying on my back on something warm and firm. The rough hands I felt before were still holding me, but now they rocked me delicately back and forth. A soothing motion that curbed any of my earlier anguish.
Turning my head I stared into hard brown eyes, that softened upon meeting mine. There were large circles under his eyes that I didn’t remember from before, and the lines of his face were tense with worry.
“Cedric? I thought-” My voice was hoarse with strain and hysteria bubbling right beneath the surface.  
He cut me off, “Shh, your okay. Your safe, no one’s going to hurt you.”
They were the exact words I needed to here, but I wasn’t surprised when I felt the presence of salt water on my cheeks. Angling my face into Cedric’s chest, I let the sobs over take me. My body shook uncontrollably. Cedric gripped me tighter, and held me through it. He said nothing of me getting his suit all wet. And he said nothing of being strong and stiffening my upper lip. In that moment he was exactly who I needed him to be; my best friend.
I’d never cried as much in my life as I did in those few minutes. Despite my views on unnecessary shows of emotion, I found it very relaxing. Like a huge weight was being lifted off me- pound by pound. Before long my shaking ceased to nothing, and I lay there exhausted in Cedric’s grasp.
It was a few minutes after that that he broke the silence. “Don’t ever do that to me again, Giana.” His voice was cold and furious.
“I’m sorry,” I mumbled into his chest. I couldn’t imagine how bad I must have scared him, how much I’d scared myself. I had never experience an outbreak like that. I’d always been so good at hiding the damage, the festering wrongness. I wanted to make sure no one saw the ugliness that brewed below the olive-tinted skin.
“I said I was going to go look for water to refill our supplies. . . I told you I would just be couple feet away if you needed me. I was behind you the whole time. . . when you were running.”
I glanced up into his eyes, they held worry, concern, and a little fear, but not the disgust I had expected. What was wrong with him? It was like he didn’t understand, like he hadn’t seen how broken I was.
“Gia,” His tone was unbearably gentle. “Your my best friend, I’d lay down my life for you in a heart beat, so would Koen.” The brown spheres that I’d always run to for guidance were full of severity and hurt. “Why didn’t you tell us?” His voice raw with emotion, “You shouldn’t have kept us in the dark.” His thumb traced the curb of my cheek bone, leaving a trail of caring warmth behind. “Your hurting. Let us help.”
“I don’t know that you can. . .” I whispered. “I see them everywhere. I relive it every time I close my eyes.” I motioned to my temple. “They’re in here, always. Some times it feels like they’re out here as well,” I laughed without humor.
He was silent for a long moment, probably trying to find the right ways to make me better. I shouldn’t have told him to save his breath, I wasn’t heal able. It must have been really hard for him, not being able to fix me like he always had with everyone around him.
There wasn’t a doubt in my mind that Cedric would be the best ruler Nucleo had ever seen. He helped people, no matter there class or social standing. Ced was the kind of man that you took a bullet for, just because you knew he’d do it for you. Unlike his father, he wasn’t genetically programed without emotions.
My thoughts froze and back pedaled. You didn’t even dare to think that way about the Everetts. It wasn’t done, you never knew who was listening in, even in the privacy of your own head.
To say Habe Everett was cold and calculating would be an understatement. The nation loved him, with his fake smiles and promises of a better tomorrow. A tomorrow where we would take back the surface from the brute animals that dared inhabit our crust. A tomorrow where we didn’t have to fear the Infected or their disease. His plan was to cure them, to rid the world of the Kytec infection once and for all. Mr. Everett then spoke of how we would reunite with our mislead brethren, how all would be forgiven, and we would live together in peace. The people ate it up.
But unlike the nation, I had met H. Everett. I’d seen the lies and deception that rolled freely off his tongue.  And I had to pretty fantasies that he meant anything he said. That was one of the reasons why I wanted to set off on this adventure in the first place. I had to see it with my own eyes. I had to believe that my life had amounted to more than just a pretty face marrying another pretty face, and procreating more pretty faces.  I wanted to able to lie in a sick bed a hundred or so years from now, obviously dying, and remember that I had lived. Not the crap they sold in books or on the news. Real happiness, fulfillment. I was determined to die with that dignity, I had the right to it, and anyone who got in my way. . . Well, let’s just say that growing up in my childhood had at least one advantage; I wasn’t afraid to go to surprising lengths to get whatever I wanted.
“There is something you can do for me,” I told him. His scrutinizing eyes searched my face for implications of what I wanted from him.
“Anything.”
I locked our eyes with every intention to hold him to that promise til my last breath. Hell, maybe even a little after that.
“Help me live.”

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Tag der Veröffentlichung: 14.10.2011

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