Chapter 1: My Boyfriend is Evil
The days seem to keep going by. No matter how much I pray for them to stop coming. No matter what I try to do... it is always hitting me in the face. Opening the wound even further. I feel as though I am at my breaking point.Even though three weeks have passed it feels as though it happened yesterday. They call it an accident and shove it off like it happens everyday. I guess if you live in a big city it might, but here it does not. I feel as though I am the only person who knows the truth. Or at least the only person willing to open their eyes to the truth. I can not even bear going back to school. I know he is there, waiting for me... He is waiting for me to act like nothing happened. He wants me to run into his arms crying asking him to protect me. I know he will not he is a monster. I could only wish that he was some supernatural force, or some monster like a vampire or werewolf, unfortunately he is pure human brute.
I hate this depression. It is like a cloud cover has come over and darkness is all I can see. I am veiled from the sun, but I believe I have done this to myself. I could act like nothing happened. I could be like the countless other people who walk around pretending they are blind to inhumanity of people and nature. Yet I must be more of a person because I can not forget, nor can I pretend that it did not happen. I can not pretend that a part of me is missing. Deep down I wish that I could be happy like my usual self. Somehow I can not resurrect that part anymore. Even my usual sarcastic personality has deflated.
The days turn into weeks and nothing changes. I am alone no one bothers to check up on me anymore. I feel detached from reality... who would not be with what is going on. I will not have a flash back of what happened. Instead I will have a flash forward into my future. Or at least what I thought my future was going to be. Instead of how messed up it is now. Here is how it went, I would be married happily so. I would be in a love that nothing could break. The world would be colorful and bright and I would always be smiling. My friends would always be with me.
This is what I think it now is going to be. I will be standing in a graveyard looking down at all the people I knew. My best friend sleeps in the ground. I did not kill her do not worry... It is more terrible than that.
I had a boyfriend which most girls my age have boyfriends. Since I am sixteen it is normal. My boyfriend was the best, we went everywhere together. Talked about everything and never kept any secrets... so I thought. He is evil, and psychotic that is the only words I can describe him as. Let me explain. He did some things to my best friend. Things that I can not even explain without getting sick at the thought. I came home one day after getting out of soccer practice. He usually waits for me at home so we can go out together. My best friend had told me earlier she was going to drop off something for my mothers birthday. The timing was to perfect.
I came home looking around to see where everyone was. My mother had not came home from work yet so I figured my best friend may have laid the present somewhere to hide it. Our usual place to hide things was in the downstairs closet. It is part of a ritual we had since we were in elementary school. It was because we did not want her brother to find our letters. He was very meddlesome at the time. That is in the past though. So I walked around a little sat my bag down and went to the closet near the backdoor. There is one by the front door but people frequent ther a lot for their jackets.
I heard something muffled and when I opened the door... Sorry I have to stop before I get sick. It is just that she was my best friend... I had trusted him. Then he did that and what happened after that made it worse. I need to breath for a moment.
Okay let me try again. When I opened the door he was there with my best friend. He had her gagged so she could not scream. He... he was defiling her you could say. I am trying to make this as less vomit inducing as possible. When he noticed I was there he stopped, zipped his pants and pulled the gag out of her mouth. He did not seem scared, or shocked that I was there. He seemd to be expecting this. Then he smiled cruelly at me as if to say I could not do anything about this.
He grabbed her by the wrist and spun past me. I felt dazed for a while but I had to follow after them. He coudl not do that, there had to be a way to stop him. I had not idea where he was going. I had to follow her screams to the bridge. He stopped by the edge and stood up on the ledge. I pleaded with him to leave her alone and let her live. I tried to bargain with him, it did not work. He threw her off letting her fall to the bottom of what is now called Dead Creek. He then jumped back down and watched me. Pleased with my reaction. That is how things turned out like this.
Even after I ran to tell someone, I could not utter a word. It was like I was mute.
So now this secret lies with me and Alex. That is his name... No one knows how she really died. They say it was an accident, since I had no proof I could not say anything. Her body was washed downstream and once they found it they could barely tell who it was. They only had half of her body... Fortunately it was the top half so they could see some of the features. They all say it was suicide. If you knew her you would know she is not the type to do that. She was always so happy, and carefree. She had no reason to jump off a bridge. Me on the other hand I have a few reasons now.
I wonder how long that had been going on. If it was only a one day thing. If it had been a long term thing. That she did not tell anyone about. I knew she had a dislike for Alex beforehand. Was that the reason. I had always thought it was because she felt lonely. I feel like a horrible person, I was a horrible friend. I should have done something. I should have acted, told someone, tried to stop him. There may have been a way to save her. I feel as though it was all my fault. I do not want to go back to school. One because Alex is most definitely going to be there. He always hangs out after school waiting for me. I can imagine that he will be there like usual. Except it is not like usual... this is completely different. I can not go back to the way things were. I also do not want to go because my best friend will not be there. Never again will I see her again. We did everything together, I considered her my best friend. Now however it is like a part of me is missing.
I am afraid of what may happen. What he may do... I begged my mom and dad to let me transfer schools. Even go for a foreign exchange student program. Of course they said no... which I think maybe they may let me if I persist a little more. Right now I am sitting by my window looking outside to the backyard. I thought about killing myself. I feel that I do not want to go to hell though. So if I am murdered at least that is better. I have a feeling I might be murdered.
I should break up with Alex. I mean you know there are a lot of reasons. Then I think what will he do? Will he throw me off a bridge and pretend it was an accident? Or will he leave me somewhere dead on the side of the road. He is not afraid to kill. He acts like it is a hobby almost. I wish that I could disappear forever. I wish I could lie here and die, then go to heaven to be with God. I wish I was anywhere but here. If my Best Friend was here maybe I could get through this better. I know though my wishes are worthless... they will never come true, no matter how hard I hope.
I locked my door afraid that he may come in. My parents would let him in thinking he is a good boy. I am not answering my cellphone, I shut it off. I thought about destroying it by smashing it. I am kind of angry right now but fear is what rules me right now. I pick my phone up and throw it at the wall. Why was things like this? The phone smacks against the wall and part of the plastic shatters off.
I feel so dark and I want to be happy. I feel helpless and lost... without anyway out. This is pathetic, and this is my end.
Chapter 2: Confrontation at Night
I open my eyes as a light flashes on my face. I died didn't I? I am free! Wait this is to good to be true.
'Hey Sweetheart.'
My heart stops beating and my blood runs cold.
'Are you not even going to say hi?'
I do not move, I dare not breath. I can feel myself shivering though I have three sheets on my bed. He knows I am afraid of him, that is what he is feeding off of. He smiles at me still.
'Oh come on stop being a b***h.'
'Me?'
'Yes there got you to say something.'
He leans down to my eye level. He is expecting me to be normal and smile. He must be expecting a kiss because I can see it in his eyes. I purse my lips and turn my head. I do not even care if he kills me now. Where did this confidence come from?
'Stop acting like this, talk to me or I may kill you.'
'Seriously?'
I say it trying to say it sarcastically. Somehow it manages to still sound like a sqawk. He smiles and I can feel his breath hit my face. I admit he is handsome, but that makes no excuses for what he has done.
'Do you think I am kidding?'
He laughs a little I can smell peppermint on his breath now. Why is he here is what I am wondering? How did he get in? Did he climb up the through my window? I live on the second floor though and there is nothing to get in with. Unless he had a rope or something.
'You killed my best friend. So if you kill me I would not be surprised.'
'And?'
He asks that in the tone of not caring. What made him this way?
'You think I am going to be normal. I will not let myself be afraid of you, and I will not be near you. If you want to kill me get it over with already. If not then get your a** out of my house.'
I am not sure how these words come out of my mouth. It is true I am not going to let myself be afraid of him. I want to be strong so that I can catch him... Or at least try... he stands up and leans back laughing and kind of raising his eyebrows trying to figure out what to say. I guess you could call that me breaking up with him. He points his finger down at me as he says the next thing.
'You know I did you a favor. You should be glad I got rid of her.'
'Really? I have been sitting here thinking you were the bad guy... wow I guess I was wrong about my best friend all these years whom I have known since I was seven. I guess I should trust the guy who was my boyfriend for a few months and did not see me for three weeks.'
I am sitting up in my bed now. I stare at him fixatedly. I know that talking like this may get me killed I feel I have nothing more to lose. Somehow this feels as if it is going by to fast though. He shrugs his shoulders.
'I was busy.'
'Killing more people?'
'No, thinking actually.'
I can not tell if he is telling the truth or not.
'Thinking about killing more people?'
'Shut up you and get over it you overgrown fat...'
'Why should I?'
I cut him off before he could say anything else. I wonder what his answer will be. I bet some lame line.
'Because I mean more to you han she ever did.'
I shake my head and stand up. Why does he act so arrogant?
'You are wrong, you are the worst person I could ever imagine being with. She was my best friend and I knew her longer than you. You are a pig who needs to keep his pants buckled. You are a homcidal maniac who I would never be with. How could you think I woudl ever want to be with you seeing as you murdered my best friend in front of my own eyes... Not that it would be any better if it was behind my back.'
He walks over to the other side of my room. I see how that my window is broken, he must have gotten through there. He definitely does not care about hiding it. I wonder if he will kill me? I feel calm een thinking about it. Strange why do I feel as though I am fine with that?
'She asked me to do that to her. I told her if we were caught then I would have to kill her and she was fine with that. So don't blame me, blame your best friend who lied to you about it.'
'That makes it so much better. You lied to and how does that make you any better?'
'It doesn't...'
'Just go ahead and kill me if you want to, I am tired of standing around talking about crap.'
'If I kill you it will be unexpected... You should run though it makes it more exciting for me.'
We switch subjects a lot... At least now he knows that I am not afraid if he is going to kill me. That is one escape from this misery. He puts one leg out the window and looks back at me.
'I will tell you though, I have not decided if I want to kill you or not.'
'That is so nice, please make a decision so I can be warned.'
'How do you know I will warn you?'
He jumps out the window without saying anythign else. What is his problem? I want to know why he killed her in the first place. Why he targeted her? If she did ask him to do that to her. If so why in a closet, in the place where she knew I was bound to look. This makes no sense. I feel to confused to even think any further. I need to rest and maybe I will take this back up tomorrow. I know there is only one way to solve this, and that is for me to solve this. No one else can, since I am the only eyewitness surviving besides the killer. I can hear him snickering outside. I bet this is a game for him. Toying with his prey... you should not play with your food though.
If I encourage him to kill me maybe he will not. Then again he might, since it is encouraging. I feel the anger in me rising. I should be more sad... how long should I be sad for? Until I forget that my best friend is gone? I wonder how her brother is doing... he is a year older than me. I could talk to him he may help... he is a computer genius as well so that could come in handy.
You know the part of Alex that really makes me angry. I thought I had loved him and he had loved me. I believed for a while that things were good and happy. I should have known better.I hear the pattering of feet on the floor. Someone is coming down the hall towards my room. The creaks open and my mom's head pops in.
'Are you okay honey?'
'Yes mom. My window is just broken, I think one of the neigbor kids threw a rock in.'
'Oh, okay I'm going back to sleep then. Night.'
'Night.'
She should be freaking out. I guess she was still half asleep. The morning should be interesting. I need my sleep. I take my blinds and put down then tie the curtains together to block anyone or anything from coming in. I no longer hear my moms footsteps in the hall. I guess I should go to sleep. Tomorrow I am starting investigating this... I will not be afraid, I will not be afraid, I will not be afraid......
Chapter 3: An English Death
'Oh Night my Love, I shall say as the death comes in my heart.'
English class once my favorite class now well... let us leave it at that. Third period, not even half of the school day is over. I was tricked into coming today. I am glad that I made it through the first two classes safely. I am thankful I am sitting here alive. English well it is fun to read scripts. I hardly get up in front of the class. I am not to good at acting.
'Be still as I plunge thy knife in thee chest.'
'Why oh why my love do you say this in laughter? Shoudl I pray for thy sanity?'
Or sometimes they make up their own scripts and stories. I am watching Julia and Chad act out something right now. They are the more active people around here.
'Can I but kiss thyn face bfore I send you to your fiery depths?'
'I shall accept they fate with honour.'
I kind of understand what they are saying. Okay actually I do not. I know the basics, someone is dying by the hands of their lover. How weird that this goes along with the theme of my life.
I hear the clap of the teachers hands. This means she is intervening and adding something.
'Okay Julia that was great, how about we let another young lady try out acting. Cherel would you like to come up front since you have been absent. If you act just a little I will count this as all of your grades.'
A very tempting offer... this is embarrasing though. I nod my head as I give in. Her gaze can make you do that. I stand up and walk to the front of the class. Julia seems a little angry. I hope she does not take her anger out on me.
'Die in peace oh wonderful love of mine. See the stars and hold my heart.'
I look at him almost rolling my eyes. Then I see a shadow in the doorway. When I notice who it is I start panicking. Why is he here... he never comes here during school. I look at Chad he is waiting for me to say something. My knees start to shake and I collapse onto the floor. Is this part of acting? I guess as long as I am feeling it I might as well act. This may get all of my feelings off of my chest. Tears start going down my face. I hope I am not laying it on to much.
'Oh please spare me, for I have not known what my wrongness has been.'
I look up at Chad. He seems a little shocked that I actually decided to act. I am a little surprised as well.
'No I can not... because of that reason. If only you could know what you have done then may I spare your soul.'
I shake my head. Then when he plunges his fake sword into my heart I make sputtering noises and fall over. Everyone claps at the display. I stand up and wipe away the tears. That made me feel so much better. I bow as the teacher walks up front. She says that I did a wonderful job and that I may sit down. Chad congratulates me on finally opening up. Everyone else says that I should audition for a part in the play. I sit down and for once I do not think about everything else. Not even the person standing in the doorway. I look back down at my notes.
'Okay so who is next?'
'I think Autumn is next.'
I raise my head at the mention of the name. Then I remember Alex was in the doorway. The worst part he said my best friends name.
'Who are you young man?'
He does not answer he simply turns around and walks away. I hear murmurs as people lean over whispering to eachother. Is he stalking me now? I guess you never know a person until they do this. The teacher then asks if anyone will go see who he is. No one budges. I raise my hand, everyone stares at me.
'I will go.'
'Cherel are you sure?'
I nod my head. He can not kill me at school can he? I stand up and grab my purse. This is not very smart of me is it? I walk out the door into the hallway. The lights are out for some reason. He is trying to scare me. I start walking down the hallway towards the end of the hall. I can see some light ahead so maybe I can find my way out of here and find him. He is either in this hallway or ran away like usual. I do not see anyone... it is only cold and dark. Well it is early spring.
I can feel the danger around me growing. Before I can find anything the bell rings. It startles me and makes me jump a little. The students start flowing out into the halls. You know I am never dating anyone ever again if it turns out like this all the time. Next time it could end up being a ax-murderer, instead of a homicidal maniac. I keep trying to think on the positive side, that I am still alive.
You know he use to be sweet. We use to talk all the time and we had so much in common. I wonder if it was all a front. We never fought, so I guess I should have expected something was up. I should have saw all the pointers.
I am guessing it all started the day I stayed after school. Autumn went to the bathroom and came back crying. She kept mumbling "he is so scary". I just thought she meant she saw a weird guy. I asked her what was wrong but she always said "nothing". Although every time I would say me and Alex were going on a date she would cringe and look as though she were going to cry. When he would pick me up from school she made excuses saying she needed to something else. I thought she was giving us privacy. I worried about her wondering what was the matter. I thought maybe she was feeling left out. Yet no matter how many times I invited her on a double date with us she never went. If it was just me and her it was okay. I was being nosy one day and watched her house. Alex walked in ten minutes later he would walk out. I know it must sound weird saying this. I finally decided to go in also as a surprise visit. Yet they were just studying. So I figured maybe the reason why she never went with us was because she needed to study or she actually had other plans. How could I have overlooked all those signs. I should have known something weird was going on.
I walk down the hallway slowly in my own little world. I am heading to Chemistry now.
'Miss me sweetie?'
I turn around to see Alex. Why is he following me now? He is getting annoying. I wonder what his problem is. Does he have multiple personality disorder or something. One of them is nice, the other mean, the other a murderer?
'No not now, not ever.'
'Oh harsh, so listen I just wondered when the best time to kill you would be?'
I turn to see his face. He is smiling a big cheesy smile. I can not tell anymore if he is joking or not.
'Right now.'
I look him straight in the eyes. I am serious and I want him to know that. He found that funny and started laughing. I kept walking, there is somethign seriously messed up with this. My fear for him has started to go away, in its place has grown anger towards him.
'Don't forget you would be nothing without me.'
He whispers that in my ear.
'Yeah your wrong, I would be better than nothing.'
I mostly just shot that out without thinking. I was hoping for a strong finish. So as to say I don't care. I do not care if he kills me, if he does then good. As long as he does not hurt my family.
'There you are Cherel I was just looking for you.'
'Sorry I was busy talking.'
'What were you talking about, you know becasue I just heard the most amazing rumor.'
'It is hard to explain Jessica.'
'I understand.'
I look back to glare at Alex. I can not wait until she leaves... Why could he not kill her, I mean it would be a better choice. Also more believable that she seduced him. I start walking and Jessica walks beside me babbling on about some new rumor going around. I pay about three seconds worth of attention and zone out. I am leaving Alex behind, he must have understood he did not belong here. I hope he falls into a well and Lassie never comes. That was a strange reference but still.
I wonder if I can act like normal. Notice the word act... which is precisely what I would do. I coiudl get close to him make him believe I am his friend, get some good evidence against him. Then I can ruin his plans, and turn him in. He could kill me beforehand though. There is one place I must go after school. The one place I have been trying to avoid for a few weeks now.
'SO Jessica how have you been?'
'Good oh you so missed it the other day in Math. Chris stood up and stared mooning the teacher. Oh and I would have told you but I could not get ahold of you. Jerry finally asked me out. I thought it was a miracle.'
'Aw I can not believe I missed that.'
I half am hearing what she is saying but some of it seems to be blah, blah, blah, blah... Most of what Jessica relies on is rumors so it is hard to listen to her seriously.
'Oh and speaking of missing things. I forgot to ask who was that cute guy and what's his name?'
'That is Alex, he is my on again off again boyfriend.'
I have to at least try pretending that I like him. He may be listening or watching. Which if I can act good enough then I can get more evidence.
'Wow I can not believe you have a boyfriend, how come I never knew? Oh his hair is so pretty how does he get it so shiny and dark black? He seems like a bad boy.'
She has no idea how right she is about that last part. Other than that I am not sure how to respond.
'Well no one ever asked me.'
Truth.
'As well I figured people might get crazy if they found out, you know the rumor mill.'
Half truth.
'He is just so cute I did not want anyone else to steal him away as well.'
Lie.
'That is so true, you know how the girls around here can be. Once they see a guy they try to set their fangs into him.'
I think I might be sick. I can not believe I have to go along with this. Well if I want it to work. Oh and if you are wondering why I never told anyone that I was going out with him. It was becasue I did not want anyone to find out. There that simple, of course I told Autumn. She was my best friend and I could trust her. Only two other people knew, I just never liked Jessica that much enough to tell her. As well he is older than me and I knew it would set a riot out if they found out.
At that moment someone walked over to where we were standing. It was a guy about three inches taller than me. He had dirty blonde hair and his eyes were a stone gray color. He looked very serious.
'Are you Cherel?'
'Yes I am, why do you ask?'
'Um some guy told me to tell you that he will be waiting.'
I can already imagine who he was talking about. Why did he not tell me himself. Sending some poor messenger. I take a deep breath and shake my head.
'Are you okay?'
'Yeah.'
In a way I want to curl up inside myself and go to sleep. Or disappear.
'You need to talk?'
'No I will be okay.'
'Kay bye then.'
The guy turns around and walks away. He seemed very concerned, I was surprised. I look over at Jessica but she is picking at her nails. I should explain that Jessica is a very self-centered person. She prides herself in her beauty. i am not sure whether this is bad. In some instances it is, other times I just overlook it. She does not care for anyone but herself... I wish she could learn some compassion.
'Do you know who he was?'
'Who, who was?'
'Really you are that unobservant?'
'I did not see anyone of importance.'
When she said this I knew why she was acting like this. She thought he was cute. She always tries to hide her feelings behind her snobbiness. What probably happened she asked him out, he turned her down and now he is her enemy. Or at least that it what I am guessing. She may just like him, like a normal person I guess.
'So... when did you start liking him? I thought you liked Jerry?'
'Well I guess around last week. How did you know I liked him?'
'I could tell by how you were acting. It was completely obvious.'
'Oh hm... Don't tell Jerry...'
I shake my head at her disappointed. I can not believe I was right. She turns her head to the side and pouts a little. I shake my head even more. She will eventually get over herself. If she stands there forever then I guess there is a new statue at the school, called con artist in action. I do not need this extra drama. One day back and this is what happens.
I can not even remember where I am going. What class I have right now or anything has fled my mind.
'Gotcha!'
The next thing I know I see an arm flash around me. I try to squirm out of the way but the person has a tight grip.I try to keep breathing. Sometimes I have problems with confined areas. It just depends... which right now my breathing is hitching in my throat. So I may pass out in about five minutes if the person does not let go. I bet I know who it is as well...
Chapter 4: Switch of Perspective
There is no solution to my insanity. Most would disagree saying it sprouts from serious trauma. I guess they may be right there is no cure. I do not want to change because this is who I am. I have been this way since the beginning. My love of the hunt is what keeps me going. It is a game of survival. Maybe it is the adrenaline that I crave... or maybe it is them in general. Whenever I see something I want I always get it. Except for one person... who seems to defy me even though I threat to kill. It would be easier to kill her if she would be angry. Of course no it does not go that way.
I could blame her death on suicide. She was so upset over her friends death that she could handle it. I have been working on this for a few weeks now. There are multiple scenarios that it could be. I just have to plant evidence where they will find it, of course not obvious. Then I sit back and watch as it unravels. I should buy some popcorn it may get interesting.
There are other solutions to this. I could work her over to my side. That may take to long... all I need is someone to be the frontman. That way I am not caught. This is where some person stupid enough to listen to my lies comes into effect. You would be surprised how many people are like that. In this town it should be easier to find. So either she works with me... or I kill her. Either way is fine with me, now it is all about decisions. I do not plan to kill at the moment. I have a feeling there is someone else trying to work an angle. So first on my list is figuring out who it is. As well as making sure he does not get to my prey before I can.
Chapter 5: Mirages
The sounds are what I first notice. The pitter patter in my ear notifies me that I am not where I was earlier. I can smell lilies and roses nearby. Did I stumble into a garden? Wait what happened earlier? My brain is to foggy at the moment for me to decipher anything. I can smell rain that explains the pattering and sploshing sounds. I am outside definitely, otherwise these things would not be so strong.
I try to move my arm but a sharp pain goes up to my shoulder. There is something sticking in my arm. I pull back a little but regret it instantly. I can feel my skin tear... With that I open my eyes and notice that my surroundings are strange. The pain dulls down as I look around to confused to think of anything else. I can see the raindrops coming down towards my face. The sky is filled with tree branches and leaves. There are few openings for the rain to fall through. The sight is mesmerizing but it makes my eyes twist around.
I close my eyes to focus on something else. Then the pain comes back to me with twice as much force. I try sitting up but something stings my sides. I feel paralyzed I can barely move and when I do I am in pain. I open my eyes again but I do not focus on the rain. Instead I survey my surroundings. I am in the forest and there are various flowers surrounding me. It looks as though they were almost strategically placed here. The flowers have thorns on them... maybe that is what keeps sticking me. I feel as though I am in a coffin of flowers.
I have to get out of here fast, even if that means getting stuck with more thorns. I quickly pull my hand up to my face. It was not thorns which were poking my skin. It was metal shaving, which some seem to still be stuck in my skin. I now see the blood trailing down my skin. The color is beautiful, especially when it pools in one area it turns into a deep crimson.
Someone must have put me here on purpose then. This is not just by some freak accident. Someone was trying to kill me... maybe I am dying but I have to try to get out of here. I pull my other hand up to my face. It is less bloody but there is a note tied to my hand. I will look at that later. I try to pull myself up almost imagining the blood pouring out of my body. I am going to need a blood transfusion by the end of this. If I can find the right type. Or if I can get out of here in time.
My body is slow to come up because of the pain mixed with weariness. I can see more clearly around me. I can see the dirt laying around which was freshly dug up. My legs are wound under vines, or something that looks like vines. I turn my head slowly to see behind me. There were metal blades lying around me. No wonder I was in so much pain. They really must had taken time to do this. I take a deep breath and start moving again.
This is probably not good for the wounds I have. Yet I did not feel like getting more. So either it was stay there bleed more, or get up and hopefully bleed less. I wonder how far from town I am? Wait if I go to the hospital like this they will question me. Which may not be good under the current circumstances. Who could I go to though? I need to think of this after I get free.
I move the vines aside to get a good look at the damage done to my feet and legs. A knife is protruding out from my ankle. How did I not feel that? Is it the you make yourself feel pain or things? Like delusions, except hm... I need to stop thinking so much. My head is starting to hurt, either from blood loss or thinking to much.
Who had planned this? Was it Alex? He did say that he would give no warning. Yet the person who talked earlier to me with the "gotcha" was not him. That person's voice was higher pitched than his. Unless he can change his voice. I also wonder how I slept through all of that? Was there some sort knock out gas or antistetic?
I pull the knife out of my leg... I can not feel it. There is no feeling in that leg. I touch the other leg which seems to have survived unharmed, I can feel my fingers on that leg. The other leg seems numb. Which I guess is a good thing.
'Cherel.'
I look around to see who sait that. There is no one around. I must be dying... or going insane. I examine my body for any other injured places. So far it looks as though I found all of them. I push myself off the ground, not an easy task. I wobble a little but regain my balance when I slam into a tree. My feelings seem to blend together now. I can not tell what is pain and what is not. I must go forward. If I stop then what does that say about me? That I give up easily, that I am such a simple person to kill. Yeah that is not who I am. I have to at least get somewhere first to warn someone. After that if my body wants to shut down and die then it can. I keep walking through the trees. It seems that was the only place with flowers. Every other place looks like a normal forest, with brown ground and some dying greenery wilting.
I push through all of this towards what I hope is town. Any sort of town will do. My feet give way under me and I slide down a slope. Where did that come from. I cough a little and try to catch my breath. I close my eyes for a little bit. Before I know it I am drifting off. I try to regain my consciousness but it seems to have ran away. Somehow when I thought of running away I thought of a nursery rhyme. The one where the cow jumped over the moon...
I hear the crunching of shoes nearby... or at least what I imagine is someone with shoes. It may be a wild animal. At least let me pretend for a moment. For a moment I can believe that someone is here to rescue me. I tried being strong... somehow I knew I was not cut out for it. I am pathetic giving up so easily...
Chapter 6: A New Predator
It was my thing to kill others. Then someone comes in and takes that away. Someone who seems to be much better at this than I am. I can not believe they took my target. I crinkle my nose and lay back in my chair. I need to think more seriously about all of this. My only question now is what did he do with her. I also want to know who it is exactly. I believe it is someone after me, maybe a family member of someone I killed previously? I wonder if she was just as easy to kill as her best friend. I doubt, she had much more of a personality.
Oh poor Cherel... she was kidnapped by some person not even I know. As you should remember I said previously that I liked the adrenaline rush... Well this is not what I meant by that. I am not really sure what I meant now. If Cherel is dead then I guess I will have to find a new target. I guess that friend of hers who has an annoying voice. I guess maybe it is what she says that is annoying.
So now what is my next move. This reminds me of chess in some ways. Except extreme chess... which my pawns are the people around me. My Knights are probably the people I "hypnotize" into working for me. My Queen well, would have been Cherel I guess. So which pawn should I move first? I put my fingers into the shape of a temple. This needs a lot of extra thinking.
Chapter 7: My Grasp on Insanity
I open my eyes a little to see what has happened. The last thing I remembered I was dying in the woods. Before that I was being kidnapped you could say. So now where am I? This is really problematic because I was going to go over to visit Autumn's brother. This delays some things... I do not think I died. I mean if I had why would my surroundings look like this. Kind of dark but I can see out a window at the sunset. Which when I was in the forest it was mid-day I am guessing. Yet that does not mean much. I take a deep breath but that is when these voices start entering my head.
'Cherel, cherel, cherel, cherel...'
I am insane that is it. I look around finally opening my eyes all the way but I see nothing. No one anywhere, maybe there is a speaker somewhere. I sit up but I lay back down because there is still pain. My body feels sore. I look at my hands and notice they are bandaged. So maybe that shoe like noise I heard was a person. Which if the person bandaged me up they can not be that bad right? I look at the walls, why does this place look familiar? I feel as though I have been here before. I know that not many people have a poster of a crazy monkey on their wall.
'Cherel are you feeling better?'
I look around this time and see someone. Which once I recognize who it is I understand why this place looks familiar. It is Autumn's brother he is holding a bag of Frito's in one hand and a notebook in the other. I must have gotten lucky. Why was he in the forest though?
'Yeah...'
I look around feeling lost. I need to sort this all out. Okay I was at school on my way to my fourth period class. Then someone comes up behind me and I loose consciousness. Then when I wake up I am in the process of dying. Or being tortured I guess you could say. After getting loose and walking around half dazed and insane I fall down this slope in the forest. I hear a noise which sounds like footsteps. Then when I wake up again I am in Benji's room. We always called him that, though that is not his name. I can understand as well now why I am bandaged so well. He is wanting to become a doctor... which he is going through some courses after school to help with that.
He sits down in a chair by his computer. He swivels around and eyes me cautiously.
'How did I get here again?'
He smirks and throws his folder onto the floor. I guess it was not that important.
'Okay well you don't remember anything then. Oh this is good. Well I was searching around the river for any clues as to what happened to my sister. I know that is probably not a smart idea but hey at least I was able to help one person. I had been walking around when I spotted someone walking through the woods. He was wearing all black and carrying something.'
He stops to make sure I am following. I look at him admiring his strength. How can he go through this with this level of... well calmness? I would probably be running around in circles. Yet that is the difference between him and me. It is a secret that I act like that so it would be best not to tell anyone. I do not like having my faults and weaknesses out in the open. People tend to pounce on people if they have information on them. Thus the reason why I never really talk about myself. He leans back slightly and taps his fingers on the armrest of the chair.
'I figured the person was not disposing of their trash in the woods. Since well they would end up getting fined, of course there is the occasional idiot. I tried following him as best as I could. I ended up losing him for a few minutes.Then I noticed he was on his way back so quickly. It made me curious as to what he had left behind. Finding this a good opportunity to be nosy and get some dirt I hicked into the woods further. You would not believe how green everything was. I felt like I was in a maze more than once. Then the guy started to come back carrying more things. This time there was someone with him. Which I believe that guy actually goes to our school.'
He stops to catch his breath. He seemed to be getting ahead of himself. He takes a deep breath then continues. Somehow this seems well to fixed. Like the guy wanted to be caught or seen. He could have been more cautious so that Benji did not see him. This seems all to weird.
'Sorry about that, I should explain further into this. The guy was hooded so I could not see his face. The other guy was younger and I know I have seen him at school before. There was something wrong with him, like he was dazed. He was carrying a shovel and a bag. The main guy was carrying well I do not know what he was carrying. It was big whatever it was, but it was some sort of material. I did not stop to think about what type. Which I tried following them again but got lost. By the time I decided to give up and walk back I heard something. Which I watched them leave and about ten minutes later of trying to sort out everything I heard another noise. I hid to make sure that it was not them coming back or something else.'
I close my eyes and hear a pop. When I open my eyes again Benji is eating the Frito's. He points at the bag momentarily to ask me if I want any. I shake my head not feeling in the mood to eat. Right now I feel a little nauseous.
'You are serious Benji? There is no gotcha's involved, or just jokings?'
'Unfortunately No, but you did not let me finish. I heard a crash and then started to walk to see what it was. There you were passed out on the ground. Looking well horrible really, I mean more than usual.'
He chuckles at that as I glower at him. Somehow after everything he seems so upbeat still. Maybe he is forcing himself to be so upbeat. I know I could not act like that in this situation.
'I thought about leaving you there. Yet since I figured you'd owe me I helped you out. I carried you from there to my car... which I had parked a long walk away to ensure no one found it. I was lucky about that. I had a feeling that the guy was not nice, and would not show any mercy. I came home in time that my parents were not here yet. I carried you up to my room. Then I bandaged you up, do not worry I disinfected all of your wounds. You have been out for at least an hour now. I was about to stick a frito up your nose but you woke up and ruined my fun.'
He stops and sets the frito bag on the top of his desk. Then he leans over to grab the folder he threw on the ground. He flipped it open and drew out a pen.
'Which leaves us at what you know. Why you were there... Did that guy take you there? You do realize if a guy says to you hey let's go to the woods you should turn around and walk away. Why were you in such a bad condition. Was someone trying to kill you? What exactly do you know?'
He stops and suddenly his face becomes serious. He is going to make notes, I understand now. I push myself up to where I am sitting. It hurts but I need to sit up for this. I look around and notice I was laying on his futon. Which now has a plain blue sheet on it. There is a poster stapled up above the bed. Which there is another poster underneath... I am guessing it is one of those
posters.
'Okay you want the truth? Just know this is not a game, we are not playing cops. People are getting hurt, and you may end up hurt. People are dying... which is what I was trying to stop. That does not seem to have worked. This as well may cause you some pain. Since this is linked to another incident...'
He nods his head and writes some things down. Maybe he is writing, patient is delusional. Who knows what he is writing down. He may even be drawing.
'Please continue. Do not be afraid to say anything. Even if this does concern my sister, I would rather know.'
I take a deep breath... I should keep this shortened down. The best place is to start at the beginning. Of what I know and what has happened.
'This all started a few months ago I guess. When I met the persone everyone says is my boyfriend.'
Benji interrupts me to comment that he did not know I had a boyfriend. After telling him he is no longer my boyfriend and trying to get him to stop making weird comments I continue.
'Back to subject Benji. It started on one of those nights where I had practice after school. I am not sure how long the thing that I witnessed had been going on. It was disgusting if I must say. I came home one day and it was the day that Autumn was coming over to drop a present off.'
'I remember that day, that was the last day I saw her.'
I stop to breath before I crumble apart.
'I wish I had known what he was like. How he acted when I was not around.'
I tried to explain what I had seen. Yet it came out gurgled and half strangled. After having a mental breakdown and having Benji comfort me I tried to continue. He should not be comforting me, I should be comforting him. Once I had told him what I had seen he seemed angry. He told me his anger was not at me, but at that guy. He also seemed sad but he was trying to hold that in. I expect he will probably break down after a while.
'Now you know what has been going on. As for the reason why I locked myself up in my room for about three weeks. Why your sister never came home. As well as what happened to her. I know they said it was accidental death... it was not. Yet I suppose it was better to think that it was. That way there was no place to blame, or no one to be angry at. That is not all of it though.'
At this point Benji is sitting next to me. Somehow I do not even notice the pain in my sides. I guess it is the distractions. He seems to actually find what I am saying interesting. As for me I am glad that I am finally able to tell someone. After all this while knowing about that was about to make me burst. Of all the people to tell who would have thought it would be him. I wish that I could have found a guy with more qualities like him. I mean not that I would go for him... that would be weird. Since we are practically brother and sister... or at least he is my weird friend if anything. I just meant that he has better qualities than some people. This is not turning out to good in my mind. I am just stopping there... I need to focus.
'After that the guy said he might kill me. Which that was a few days ago when I finally came out of my killing myself... I mean as in my mind. He even broke into my house, he broke my window and woke me up. He was thinking that I would just act like how I had before. After arguing and deciding I did not care if I was killed but I would not let him get away with that he left. Well that was kind of how things went... Anyway then I went to school eventually after that. My time is perhaps off so forgive me for that. Which he showed up at my school, see no one had known I was with him before the whole... anyway he stopped me in the hallway to talk. Then I met Jessica, you know the annoying girl. He left and then we were walking. She invited me to some event. I told her I was not going. There was this guy who had said that Alex was going to meet me somewhere. He seemed to disappear after that for a few minutes. Then I was walking to third period this person came up behind. He put his hands around me and because I freaked out I hyperventilated and passed out.
When I woke up I was in so much pain I was confused about where I was. Then I found out I was in forest. Which once I noticed that there were plants there that did not belong. As well as freshly dug ground. So you seeing that guy carrying a shovel makes sense. There was a knife in my leg and various other things. Once I got free I started to leave. I thought many times I was going to die. Then I slipped on this slope went down, I heard your footsteps. So I figured it was that guy... Then I woke up here. I think that maybe if I go to sleep I might wake up from this nightmare.'
I stop because there is nothing else I can recall that has any significance. He pulls me closer to him and starts to pat my back. It is quite awkward he does not seem to notice. This is such a strange ending. I was not expecting this to happen at all. I figured he would have made some notes and went off to investigate something. I wonder how he is handling all of this in his mind.
Chapter 8: Past and Present
You could say this all started years ago. The whole part with me going around brutally murdering people. No one has found me of yet. That is because I killed the people before they got to it. There however is one person who knows... I do not see him being much of a problem.
I have no family. It does not bother me anymore. I figured a family would get in my way. I had a family a long time ago. I had a elder brother, two sisters... and one other, who I do not mention. That is because he is my twin. I do not acknowledge him anymore... My elder brother went away to college. College must have really twisted him around. He pretended to kill himself, and convinced everyone that he had died. When he came back to kill all of us I was surprised. I had always looked up to him. My twin well who know what had happened to him. I am not sure if he had been killed in that massacre or not. I just never liked the idea that he might be out there. My elder brother killed my parents, and my sisters. Somehow I had escaped... though I did not want to. I would have rather died there with them than lived this life. I was four years old at that time. There was a large age gape between all of us. I am surprised my memory was so good from that time. Yet seeing your family killed does that to you. It imprints on your mind and never leaves. Only brings itself back up and haunts you.
After that I lived on the streets. Mostly in garbage cans. I am still not sure to this day how I survived exactly. One night I awoke to a rustle outside my trashcan. That was the night someone had tried to kill me. Even through that I had escaped. I was a very lucky person. Yet after that I decided to get revenge on all humanity. Well at least the people who truly deserved it. I base that off of what I think. Analyzing a person for a while then I kill them.
I was never able to stop once I started. It was a never ending trail. It started to seem that everyone was bad. I do not really want to stop at the moment. I am happier when I kill, I guess it is like putting a piece of my unhappiness somewhere else. Or maybe it is replacing it with that person.
I have not found out who the other killer in this town is yet. Which I think they had killed Cherel. How sad I was actually thinking of letting her live. I mean eventually I would have killed her, but for the moment being I would have let her live.
You are probably thinking I am a horrible person. Yet you do not realize there are worse killers out there. At least I sometimes show mercy for the people. I do not torture the person that much. I could be more cruel. As well as I could be killing more people. What makes me curious is who the other kill is. I have to eliminate the competition. Which this person seems more melodramatic, or more into drama and more cynical than I am. That could be a problem, that person could be an actor.
For now I am just going to relax.
I will eventually get around to inspecting this.
Chapter 9: Hey so Um, its Me?
I woke up this morning feeling as if I had been asleep for days. I felt half paralyzed and I could not move. I could not even remember what I had done yesterday, or the day before, or the day before that. It was like all of my memories were gone. Which I fell asleep again not thinking much on it. I finally woke up again... Which I am not as paralyzed. I still can not remember anything.
'I see you are awake finally.'
I jerk uprightin my bed at the sound of someone else's voice. I look over at my chair which I can barely see. The darkness seems to mask the person's face. He is sitting in the chair. I am expecting it is a He. The voice sounds like a guys. Unless it is a very muscular or manly girl. I kind of want to know how the person got into my house. Why he is in my room. Why he also seems to be over familiar with me, when I have no idea who he or she is.
'Who are you?'
'You do not remember anything I presume. That is good for you. Since you did some horrible things that I do not think anyone would forgive you for.'
'Who are you?'
'Fine my name is Jeran Thomas.'
I try to look closely. I do not know anyone by that name. I also have no idea what he means by horrible things. I could not have done anything that bad. I bet he has something to do with it. I am guessing with the name it is a guy. It sounds masculine at least.
'Why are you here?'
'To inform you of what you have done why else?'
I shake my head but still do not understand. I can see his head movement just a little. I think he tilted his head. Why does that simple move seem to intensify things?
'You are a murderer now. Welcome to the club.'
'No I am not.'
I scoff at what he has said. I do not remember killing anyone. You would figure I would. Unless this is like a Dr. Jekel and Mr. Hyde scenario.
'Oh yes, yes you are. You kind of killed Cherel Nickelson. Which if I must say it went over smoothly. I did not figure a person of such inexperience would be able to pull it off. Yet you surprised me.'
'The girl who's best friend was Autumn and killed herself?'
He nods his head, I can tell that clearly. He must be joking, I would not kill her. I have known her for well a long time. Cherel was always so nice to me even if no one else was. I never really knew her, but I knew her well enough not to kill her.
'Why would I kill her?'
'I made you... of course you would not remember since I put you into a trance. You had to obey me and that was what I made you do.'
I snort and roll my eyes. He seems to see that from over there.
'Do not roll your eyes. I am your only friend now. If you want me to tell everyone then please I dare you to go against me. For now you are my play toy, so get use to it.'
'What did you have against Cherel?'
He stops for a little while. He must be thinking of a good answer?
'The same thing I had against Autumn. They never cared about me. They always left me filling in their shadows.'
'Did you kill Autumn?'
I feel as if my heart is going to stop from the suspense.
'I am flattered you would think that. Though unfortunately no, someone else got to her before I could.'
He stops there for the moment. What is going on?
Chapter 10: Lying for the sake of Living
We decided after a lot of talking it was better to let the person think I was dead. Which means lying to everyone. It was the only way we could thinkt that this all would work. That person would think they succeeded leave me alone. Then I can investigate things better. As well as the person will not target my family, hopefully. I may regret this later. Which I guess I could just tell my family that they should act like I am dead. Yet they are not very good at lying. Which I am not sure where I got my ability. Maybe it is something you loose once you get older. When morals start sounding good and rules seem to be a good idea then it must disappear.
Which Benji said I can stay at his house. His parents never go to his room... even though I have a feeling this is going to be awkward for a while. I am grateful to him that he thought of this. I wish that there was someone else, yet pulling anyone else in on this is just a problem. The bad problem is finding clothes, I could not wear Autumn's clothes. That would feel wrong, and would make me think of everything. Even though I have it on my mind anyway, that would intensify the problem. I somehow feel like a detective. In a weird twisted story... definitely not like Sherlock Holmes. Or one of Agatha Christie's books. I wish it were more like a Nancy Drew mystery. I was very much into mystery books when I was younger. Lately it seems that I have not wanted to read anything.
Right now it is ten at night... I am lying awake listening to Benji snoring. I told him I would take the floor. Yet he said we could both fit on his futon. Which now his feet are right beside my head. I would rather have slept on the floor. He needs some deodorizer for his feet, anti-fungis cream at least something would be good. I try to laugh at that but I can not. My mind is dead, it needs to be revived. Or it could be the fact I am hungry. Which there should be some sort of stash in Benji's room. Of course I am scared to eat anything he has put in here. It could be a day old to ten years old.
I roll over onto my side away from Benji's feet. Something grabs my feet which startles me. When I look down there is a figure by the otherside of the bed. A light comes through the window from the street. When I see the face I feel as if I am in a distorted dream. The face is mangled beyond repair, and the muscles seem to be hanging out everywhere. The eyes are hollow and it seems mascara is streamed down the face. The hair looks like it was strangled with water. My eyes go slowly down to its hands. Which are bloody and with a lot less skin than the face. The light goes away and I feel as if I am going to pass out from lack of breath. Maybe it was the lighting... my eyes were playing tricks on me. Another light comes through the window and the figure is by my face. I can see clearly every line in the face. This time I can smell the stench of the breath, as if the inside of its body has rotted. The teeth are half white, half yellow and some of them look chipped. This time I can see the eyes... I had thought they were hollow eye sockets. They are not, it is only bloody eyes. My foot jerks and kicks Benji. He groans and tosses over half mumbling. The light goes away for a minute then another one returns. The figure is gone just as quickly as it had appeared.
That was not there, that was not there. I try telling myself this but despite my efforts I know it was there. I am not sure what that was. It was not Benji playing tricks on me. His parents would never do that. They are so uptight sometimes I think they can not breath because of it.
I can feel my body shaking. Which means that I am more scared than I am willing to admit. I try to be strong... but in this situation I do not think I can last long. Maybe that figure looked terrifying becasue of the lighting. It was the car lights which caused it to look like that. You know I did not even hear any movements. Unless maybe my hearing was off because of that thing. It looked like something from the grave. I hear the creak of a floorboard outside in the hallway and I jump. I end up turning the other way and grabbing Benji's legs. I wish it were a pillow but I do not want to move. That thing might be back... it may be outside. Or it could just be his parents. For some reason I can not reason with my mind. My eyes are clenched shut so tight there are tears coming out the sides. I can feel Benji stirring. After a while of mumbling and groaning he leans behind him to turn on his light. I can tell by the click of a switch.
He is probably rubbing his eyes now. Sitting up and now noticing I am clutching onto his legs for my life. I feel pathetic and like a little kid scared; afraid of a haunted house.
'Cherel what are you doing?'
I can tell he is still partially asleep. His voice sounds groggy and rough.
'Nothing.'
The words rush out of my mouth coming out much louder than I expected. He grabs me by my shoulders and pulls me off. He is much stronger than he appears. I open my eyes now. He pulls me closer to face him. He looks concerned, annoyed, and tired. I am not sure which one is winning at the moment.
'Please tell me what is bothering you. If you do not then I will not be able to tease you with it later.'
I squirm a little and pucker my lips. Then I decide to tell him no matter how weird it sounds. After telling him what I saw he sighs.
'You can see it then? I thought it was only me who could see it.'
'What do you mean?'
He lets go of me and I flop down onto his legs. He grimaces while I move over so that I am not injuring his legs. He has a bruise on his one leg... he said it was from running into some metal railing. He pushes his hands through his hair quickly. It is a weird move I thought only existed in cheesy movies.
'Well to keep it simple it appeared after Autumn disappeared. I have been wondering if it was not Autumn... it would make sense with the timing and the appearance. Why she keeps coming into my room makes me puzzled. I thought I was just seeing things... it is good to know that it is not just me.'
'So what you are telling me is that you think it is your sister. She grabbed my leg... why would she do that? Unless she wants to lead us somewhere... show us some sort of clue. Does she appear every night?'
He leans over against his wall. He closes his eyes and breaths for a minute or two. He seems so much nicer when he has his eyes closed. Or maybe it is the fact he is not talking. I am trying to joke a little there. When he replies it seems as though it is hard for him to say. He then tells me that she appears every night at the same time. He says that she usually does not grab him.
'Cherel can we continue this in the morning. I just want to get some rest before jumping into this again.'
I nod my head and crawl back to the other side of the bed. He leans back and clicks off his light. I manage to go to sleep. Maybe it is just thinking that the figure may have been Autumn. I have a much better feeling if it was her instead of someone I do not know.
When I wake up in the morning I hear birds chirping before I hear anything else. My body jumps a little and I am sitting up straight looking around. I almost forgot that I was in Benji's room. This is to strange, I am in my late best friend's brother's room. Whom I remember sharing a lot of jokes about. I feel a little out of place, even though I have known Benji for a long time. It is just strange, since well I am a girl in a guy's room for one. Not that Benji is much of a guy. I pull myself out of those thoughts. After looking around I notice that Benji is still asleep. As well as it is almost time for him to be going to school.
This pushes me onto another problem. I need a disguise if I am going to be dead. Which I need another name as well. I will probably do some research today. I think if I can get some information on the internet that could help. A list of everyone in this town. That way I can keep track of who everyone is. Who may be targetted next. I am not sure really what to look up. That guy who I saw yesterday before passing out it would be helpful to know his name or anything about him. I barely remember who he was now.
'Ay Cheewel...'
Benji yawns and stretches. I did not even notice that he sat up.
'So we should start investigating today I guess.'
I wonder if he thinks he is going to be going with me. It would become suspicious if both of us were missing from school.
'Actually you should go to school I think... oh you can figure out that one guy's name and information about him. It would bring to much attention if both of us were missing today.'
'I guess you are right, but don't you need a disguise? I mean if people see you walking around town that would also draw attention.'
He moves around a little and cracks his knuckles. Most people find that sound sickening, I guess I got use to that. That is one thing both him and Autumn had in common.
'Precisely, yet I have nothing to disguise myself with.'
He crinkles his eyes a little like he is thinking. Sometimes he is thinking and other times he just makes that face.
'I think I have an outfit... and there is a wig in the closet. I think one of my Aunt's dropped it here when they were visiting.'
I jump out of the futon with a light thud. Well I guess that works... I just hope the wig is not one of those old grandma wigs. He pushes himself to the edge of his bed. I wonder what I should be doing but there is nothing to do at the moment. He stands up slowly and goes to his closet which is hidden behind a dorito bag, three jackets, two shirts I think, a pair of pants and a can of spray cheese. I decide not to question why that stuff is there. He pushes the things aside, which I would have thought ate him. He opens the doors slowly and rummages through the bottom.
'Here is the outfit.'
I almost cringe a little. An outfit which came out of the bottom of his closet. He pulls out a white box. Then he hands it over to me.
'That was for my girlfriend.'
My one eyebrow goes up while the other seems to stay flat. It is a mixture of puzzled and questioning. I never knew he had a girlfriend. I do not remember him having one at least.
'We broke up over a week ago. She said I had to much drama going on.'
'So basically she got bored of you. People like that really make me want to just... hm... slap them on the head. Maybe revive a few braincells.'
He shrugs his shoulders and walks out of his room. I guess the wig is in another closet. Should I get dressed now or wait until I know he is going to be gone for a few minutes. Well I really do not want him walking in on me. I stand there contemplating for a few minutes. Then he comes back in the room. He tosses me a blonde wig, it is a shoulder length cut with slightly spiked ends. What type of aunt did this belong to?
'So you can get dressed in here, I am going to get dressed in the bathroom. Oh and my parents are downstairs at the moment. They will probably leave in five minutes or so. If you need anything else it is probably in the bathroom.'
He turns around grabs a shirt off of his dresser top then bends down to grab a pair of pants off of a table by his door. Then he is gone... leaving me to some peacefulness. I lay the wig down on his bed. I wonder what type of outfit he would buy for a girl? I open the white box and peek inside. I think there is a jean skirt, or capris. I give up waiting and I just open the box all the way. There is a skirt, but it is a black kind of shiny skirt. It comes down to about three inches above the knee. I never wear skirts usually... if I do they are not like this. Or I wear legging underneath. I will have to make and exception today. I pull the skirt out and lay it on the bed. The shirt underneath is actually kind of pretty. It is a purple color with two black stripes going up the sides. What type of shoes should I wear? I will figure that out later. I put the skirt on first and then go to put the shirt on.
In the middle of getting the shirt I had on off and putting the other one on I hear something knock over. I whirl around to face the door. There is Benji holding a pair of shoes. His mouth is gapping wide open and I feel embarrassed beyond belief. I turn around to face the wall trying to hide myself. No guy has ever seen me in just my bra before. I can feel my face flaming red. It is probably blinking signaling out to any satellites in space saying look at my humiliation.
'I'm sorry.'
He chokes the words out and runs out of the room. It is partially his fault for not knocking. That does not erase the fact that he walked in on me getting dressed. How long had he been standing there? I pull the shirt on quickly trying to figure out how it fits. It seems to want to suction cup to my curves. Which this outfit is not helping me at all. I hear a knock on the door.
'Cherel can I come in?'
'Yeah Benji you can come in.'
He walks in with his head down. He walks over to me and holds out the shoes. I take them and put them by the wig.
'Sorry for um... coming in just then. I kind of forgot.'
I pat him on the shoulder very robotic like. This made things a little weird between us. I turn around and grab the wig up...
'My parents are gone now, so you can come out.'
'Thank you, and it was not your fault so don't worry about that.'
He nods his head and I walk out of his room. I have to pull my hair back which I need a brush. Which a brush would be in the bathroom I guess. It takes a few minutes to pull my hair up and hide my hair. Yet I eventually am able to pull it off. I slip the wig on and make sure it looks okay. There is one problem I need eyeliner.
In the end of this whole process I am ready to go out. I have my shoes on now. Which they are heels actually, luckily it is only a one inch heel. Sometimes I have problems walking in heels. I try to forget what happened earlier. Maybe by this afternoon we both will have forgotten that incident. I seem to walk down the stairs first. I feel like a different person but the same person. I am not sure what I look like. Since I do not like judging myself.
I am taking these extra steps to ensure that no one knows who I am. For one because normally I do not wear that much make-up. For two I do not dress like this ever, unless I am alone. I feel very self consious about myself. It is a problem that is deeply rooted from all that horrile childhood teasing. Which Jessica was never much help with. We use to be horrible enemies. Not just the name calling but sometimes she would sneak into my house and cut my hair. Then I would sneak over to her house and steal a lawn gnome... after that I would put it right by her nightstand. One of her childhood fears was lawn gnomes. She told me later on that she thought they were going to eat her. We are still not that great of friends, it was only in middle school that she started being nice to my face. I can still feel the daggers in my back though.
I inspect my work, not bad for my first try. It still makes me question how Benji found all of this. I understand that the dress was for his now ex-girlfriend. Which if that is the case this is one of those outfits. The outfits that the guy thinks is hot... maybe I will just wait until he leaves. He was expecting to see his girlfriend wear this... that just makes it awkward. Now the wig may help calm me down. It was his aunts supposedly... I wonder what type of aunt she was? Why would she leave a wig here? I shrug my shoulders... I make sure the wig goes with everything and then I open the door. With that the humiliation comes back to me. Maybe I should just jump out the window. The feeling makes my chest hurt. Why I am not sure.
Deep breath, just breathe calmly. Get through this day and it should be easier the next. You know I have known Benji for a long time. When I would have sleep overs with Autumn he would stay in there with us. Until around middle school when he started inviting his friends over. He made sure to stay clear from us. I guess we were embarassing to him. I will think of last night like a sleepover, for old times sake. This morning he was not there, it was just my imagination. If I believe like that then maybe it will stop haunting me. I am trying to block out any other thoughts that may creep up into my mind. Most of which I expect may make me want to lose my appetite. I peek my head out into the hallway. I hear nothing, I see nothing... but I think I smell something burnt. Ah, Benji is probably trying to cook. He was well, he's Benji. You know everytime we called him that in public people would look at us strange. Especially when we were little. I think it is because there is this dog in a movie with that name. I never watched it so that is why I have no memory of it. My steps make a slight ticking sound on the floor. At least it is not a clomping sound.
When I get to the stairs I try to see how I am going to get down them. I think almost dying once in two days is enough for me. I grab the railing on the stairs and make slow steps. I never trusted myself in heels on stairs. It just seems like a disaster waiting to happen. I can almost imagine my crumpled body at the bottom. I bet Benji and Autumn's mom would have a fit. "Oh no not on my newly installed white but not white carpet. Ray hurry up and go get the steamer, before the stain sets in."
Ray is her husband, I often heard her call him that so it was something I remembered. Her name on the other hand I am not really sure what it is. I make it to the bottom and sigh relieved that I have managed thus far. I hear some cursing coming from the kitchen. I was right Benji was trying to cook. Which if he stays here much longer he maybe late for school. This place seems so familiar to me, it was always like my second home. I make myself turn right and go into the kitchen. I can not avoid everything.
'Benji you need some help?'
He throws down a slice of burnt toast onto the counter. You would figure a toaster would be easy to operate. He brushes off his fingers then looks up. My one eyebrow goes up in a questioning look. He looks at me then turns in another direction. I can tell that he is blushing his ears are turning pink. I wonder what he is thinking about? Wait no nevermind I do not want to know.
'Um... no I'm fine just trying to get something before I have to leave. Guess I'll just grab a poptart. Um... well... uh see ya later.'
He dahses out of the kitchen without another word. Well that was a nice conversation. See you later to? What a weird guy. I am not going to think of it, not going to. I turn around and look out of the kitchen window. You can clearly see into the neighbors house from here. They usually leave their living room windows open. Not a good choice for them. There is no oen in there so what is the harm of looking into their house? Yes granted sometimes you see things you do not want to. I have heard horrible stories. Like the one where someone was looking through windows while taking a walk. She ended up seeing a more heavyset man in a speedo through a big bay window. That makes me afraid to look into houses. I wait to hear the front door open and close. Nothing oh well maybe he left something upstairs. Someone goes into their neighbors living room. It is a girl pretty young maybe a year or two younger than me. Someone else walks into the room. I blink once, then twice before it sets in who it is.
'Ah... ack...'
I step back and bump into a table. I am blinded! Blinded I tell you! I turn to the otherside. Think of something else, happy place, happy place.
'What is it?'
Benji comes rushing back into the room. I motion for him to turn around. He should not have to see that.
'Don't look over there, trust me.'
He turns around and looks anyway.
'Oh my what is he doing over there? Here he is telling us to study for the exams this week and he's next door...'
'That just makes me sick. Who would have thought, isn't he like forty or something?'
He turns around to face the other wall. We talk back and forth about this for a while. We narrow it down that he is over forty but not yet fifty. He is one of the English teachers at our school. Which what I saw and what he saw... yeah something you never want to see again. That type of relationship with a student could get him fired, and sent to jail or prison. That is definitely under pedofile, and felony.
I just realized we are talking normally now. I guess one good thing came out of this. Some of the awkward tension has left.
'Okay I am going to school.You can leave through the back door. If someone were to see someone exiting this house like that there would be just something I do not want to explain.'
I smile and we talk a little bit more. He leaves the kitchen walking very quickly. The door opens and then closes with a thud. It makes me jump a little. I thrum my fingers on the tabletop. I should leave where to now? I think I need some coffee to wake me up a little more. I will forget what I saw. First to the coffee shop, sometimes just by talking to people you find out things. Then to the library, I will research some things online. I think I have a plan now.
Somehow I had made it out of the house undetected by any people in their houses. I make it to my favorite cafe and sit down inside. A double mocha cappuccino sounds pretty good. I observe the people in here. There is a guy by the window talking on a cellphone. He seems to be a little upset over something. A girl in a booth on the otherside of the door is talking very interested at a guy sitting across from her. The guy seems bored and is yawning. Three college guys are sitting in the back corner laughing and probably talking about fart jokes or sex. One of them seems more suspicious than the others. He resembles someone I have seen before. I try not to stare at him. I look around to the other side. Two girls are sitting on the other side of me talking about their current relationships. It suddenly hits me why the guy looks familiar.
He looks like a older version of Alex. He seems more mature but there is one difference. The hair color, his is bleached and white. I look away quickly why am I looking at him that much. It could just be coincidence. Is there any explanation? He could be his brother, but why would his brother be in town? I never really knew much about Alex I guess. If he did tell me something it is probably good to assume it was a lie. I hear someone's footsteps coming closer.
'Um excuse me do you mind if I get your number?'
I look around to face that guy. How did he get over here so fast? I have to make sure to change my voice. Luckly I have taken some extra classes afterschool for that. It was not my idea Autumn really wanted to be in those classes. Where am I from? France some foreign country? That is my safest one, I do impersonations better for that one than any of them.
'Why do you want my number?'
He leans back and studies me a little. I look at him carefully... he is very suspicious. Not just because of who he resembles. But as well how he holds himself. It is the twitching in his face that makes it really noticeable.
'Ah so you are not from around here?'
I close my eyes and then open them again.
'No I am not, and if you please I am in a hurry and have no time for idle chatting.'
'I must say your English is magnificent.'
I think about this for a while. Not to long so that he will question me.
'I have taken classes while I was younger.'
I set my coffee down and stand up. I bow my head a little to him and walk out the door. Do not look back, do not look back. I have this itching to look back to see his expression. Yet that will just make it worse for me. So much for having coffee. Who was that, and why was he there? Why did he come up to me like that? Why would he want my number.
I walk along the sidewalk trying to make answers for these questions. Yet nothing comes to mind. Well I guess then to the library. There is no sense in worrying needlessly about this. I keep walking where am I heading to? What am I doing now? I walk up the steps of the library and start across the waxed marble floor. Well maybe I can find something?
I have the feeling that I am being watched. Maybe it is the elderly gray haired woman behind the front desk. She looks over at me from behind her bifocals.
'Dear is there anything I can get you?'
I shake my head no. No need to include other people in on my problems. I have a feeling this whole thing is like a strange virus... and if you tell someone about it, bam instantly they are killed. When you know to much I guess they cut you off. Reminds me of those really old shows were they had detectives on them. Except that was a show... and the people were paid to act like that. In real life no one would believe me, no they would think I was joking or under to much stress. Thus the reason why proof is needed. As long as I can find some sort of proof that it was indeed Alex that well you understand right? I wonder if he was the one who tried to "get rid" of me? In a way I expected it but not like that.
The last person I remember seeing was that guy. So what do I do from here? I came to the library to look at what? I turn around to look at the door. At any moment someone could come through there... I am surprised no one has recognized me yet. Okay so the bottom half of the library is mostly books for the public. The top half has a children's section, and files... as well as every newspaper this town has ever made. Well excluding a few which were burnt by some vandal.
I think the books would be no help. The newspapers however might just give me some information. Any small incidents, a picture something. The stairs going up are very waxy. I can feel the elderly woman stare's. She is probably curious over who I am. Most of the people in town are nosey. If you are not from around here then you usually get the third degree from them.
If only this were one of those Nancy Drew Mystery books. It would be solved like that... with just a few small clues it would unravel. Unfortunately I am not Nancy, and this town cover's things up to well. I reach the top of the steps with one last breath. I never realized there were so many stairs. Down the hall I walk, children's room is first on the left, the first room on the right is locked. So it is probably private files. Then the next room on the left is the collection of newspapers. Finally I have made it... this is no time to start feeling like I accomplished something though. I have much more to finish, and much more to start.
The room is a little dim but I feel as if there is something in here that at least will give me hope. Well I should take my first step into investigating. Deep breath, one, deep breath, two, deep breath, three. Through the entrance I walk into a fresh start...
To BE Continued...
*Have any problems with this please write a comment. If you find that you can not understand this then tell me what your problem is. If you problem is nonsensical I will be sure to tell you... If you skimmed this over well then it is your problem if you do not understand.*
Tag der Veröffentlichung: 21.07.2011
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This is by far not finished... but thank you to the people who have read the first version... this is a revisation.