The White Men

  It was before dawn when the first white men walked into my little village. They were wearing big suits made of shiny stuff. It banged together when they moved. They told us that we had one hour to gather our belongings. Their voice was hoarse and rough. Their breath smelled of the colored liquid they were always drinking. The liquid that dulls the mind.

The drink of death.

They ride around on their huorses and fight in their wuhores. They call us Indeeuns. Their "chief " is a man by the name of Andrew Jackson. He let them do this to us. This terrible thing called the Indeeun Reemooval Act. This act was made to move all the Indeeuns to another territory.

I helped my mother finish packing and went to help the other families. It was horrible. I had to watch as the elders left behind their most precious belongings so that they could carry the children's toys. I saw a mother crying for she had to leave behind the chair that her father carvred for her many years ago from her favorite tree. I saw her set down the blanket her mother had weaved for her on the chair. It was sad because it was the only thing she had left to remember her parents by. I could feel a single teardrop make its way down my face. I wiped it off and glanced around nervously, hoping that no one had seen me cry.

As they had said the white men returned in an hour. They dragged the families out of their homes and forced us into rows like we where ugly, pathetic little animals. I got out of my home and helped the people stand up. I helped the children find their families and pick up their clothes and food. As they forced us to start walking, I turned around one last time to see my home.

My beautiful home.

My only home.

The one that was going up in flames.

Goodnight my angel

     "Snowdrop I'm scared."

"Hush my little angel or they will hear you"

"Snowdrop, where's Black Bear?"

"He's looking after your brother. Now be be quiet and go to sleep." 

"Okay, goodnight Snowdrop."

"Goodnight my angel. Sleep well and have beautiful dreams."

"I love you."

"I love you too."

Angel was sick that night. She had a raging fever and could not get up on the morning. The white men would not let her rest. We traveled for miles. Black Bear switching loads with me after awhile. He carries Angel for a few miles while I carry our sacks. Then, we switch. I carry Angel for a few miles while he carries our sacks and we repeat. Hours after hours of walking. Only getting to rest at night and tend to Angel's fever. We thank the gods everynight for being able to wake up in the morning and being healthy. We cannot say the same to Angel. She passed last night in her sleep. It's a miracle she lasted this long. The white men buried her along side the bodies of the others. With only a stick pointing out of the ground to show of her grave. We had to walk on until the end of the day. I could not sleep. I tossed and turned on the ground. It was cold and hard. I cried myself to sleep for the next few days. The only thing keeping me from stopping to get killed by the white men was Black Bear. He told me stories about Angel and what she use to do before going to bed. He played games with me to keep me occupied. I am glad I know Black Bear. Without him I would not be here. Without him Angel would have died at birth.

"Goodnight my angel. I will see you soon."

And with that, I fell asleep.

 

 

The Journey

  We walked on for days. Stopping every few hours so the white men can rest. I watched as a few of us tried to escape. Only to be shot down by their guns. I stood watching as time passed by. Second by second. The sun beating down on my back. We have been walking for a long time. I'm getting tired but, I push on. Every few days we get a new group of Indeeuns who join us. We are all headed to the same place. Different journey's, same destination. I wonder where we are headed. I look up to see the vultures circling around us. My legs hurt from so many days of walking. What day is it? I have lost track. There are so little of us left. Death has become a familiar thing. Everyday we have another death. Everyday another life lost. Everyday someone's journey has come to an end. It has only been a week but, it feels like I have been walking forever. We are stopping for the night. It's cool outside. I haven't seen Black Bear for awhile. I wonder what he's doing right now. I'm geting tired. I'll just.......

***
I woke up to the sound of Black Bear's voice.

"Snowdrop. Wake up. Snowdrop. Get up. Snowdrop. Hurry."

I opened my eyes.

"BLACK BEAR! Where have you been?"

"Oh, you know. Around."

"What?"

"Anyways, get your stuff."

"What?!"

"I guess being with the white men so long you get brainwashed."

"What?"

"Doen't matter. Just get your stuff. And be quick about it." Said Black Bear. Alittle impatiently.

I get up and start packing. "Why? Where are we going?"

"I'm going to get you out of here. Just be quick Snowdrop. The sun's rising."

I finished gathering my stuff and walked out of the make-shift tent the white men built for us. The cool night air was brushing up against me. Caressing me. Soothing the empty pain I felt inside. Like a mother. I looked up to the see the stars shining down on me. I remember the stories the elders told me. It was about the stars and how they are the spirit of my loved ones.

"Look up into the sky Snowdrop. What do you see?"

"I see stars. Aren't stars those shiny things that float in the sky at night?"

"Good job! Know tell me, do you what stars are made of?"

"Ummmmm..." 

"Snowdrop, did you know that stars are actually the spirit of your loved ones?"

"Really? That can't be possible!"

"Anything is possible. All you have to do is believe. Now look at this." He pointed at a star. This star wasn't like any other star. This star was not the brightest. It was not the biggest. It was not the prettiest. This star was normal looking.

"That star is Black Bear's mother. Remember when she left after giving birth to Angel?"

"Yeah...why is she that star?"

"Well, she's that star becasue that star is the smallest. When you die, your star will resemble you in some way. Black Bear's mom was little but strong. That's why she's the smallest. But she was strong. That's why you can see the light. I think those stars are the kindest and the prettiest."

"Wow. I wonder what kind of star I will be."

"Snowdrop. You don't have to worry about that now. You still have so much time in front of you. Rember that if anything happened to your mother and I or anyone else that is close to you, that if you look up into the sky at night, we'll always be there. Looking down on you. Okay?"

"Okay daddy."

A tear rolled down my cheek. I remember that day. It was so long ago. Before all this happened. Black Bear noticed I was crying.

"What are you crying for?"

"It's nothing. I just... Let's go."

"Here."

He handed me my pack. And he and I walked away from the white men.

When we were at the mountains I looked up at the sky. I wonder which star is Angel. I wonder how's she doing. I think about all the things we use to do. We made camp place and set our stuff out for the night. As I was laying there I tried to find my family in the stars. It's only me now.

"Goodnight my family. Goodnight my Angel. Goodnight mother. Goodnight father."

I finally closed my eyes and slept.

 

 

The Dream

One by one we were shrinking in size. I want to go home. I want to be safe in my little hut with the smell of the berries enveloping me, joining my body and caressing my soul. I want to be home with the smiles and laughter of the tribe when we circle around the fire. The elders telling stories and the little ones enjoying life.

We had to walk on. We must keep walking to the place that the white men put us. I am getting tired. I don't think I will make it. But as I looked up to the heavens I saw my father. He was trying to tell me something. I started running towards him. White men are trying to shoot me, the roots of trees are coming alive and trying to stop me. I keep running. They can't hurt me. Not now.

"DADDY!!! DADDY!!! Look! It's me! Your daughter! Snowdrop! Daddy! Look I'm here! DADDY!"

No matter how fast I ran I could not catch up to him. I tripped over something and fell to the ground. I looked to see what it was. A snowdrop. Snowdrops mean consolation and hope. This is a sign. It has to be. This was the only flower for miles around and it was a snowdrop.

A snowdrop... I'm Snowdrop. Snowdrop. Hope. Snowdrop. I. Am. Hope. I. Am. Snowdrop. Snowdrop. Hope, me. Snowdrop. Snowdrop. Snowdrop...

What does this mean? Is there hope in me? Am I hope? Is this flower hope? Snowdrop. Snowdrop. Snowdrop.

"Snowdrop," I say as if this was a brand new word. "Snow. Drop." and my voice fades away and I am surronded by darkness.

Black Bear's POV

 

 I woke up to the sound of a scream. I looked over at Snowdrop and she was sweating and crying. I shook her and she looked at me with tears in her eyes. I pulled her close and whispered that everything was going to be alright, that it was only a nightmare. I pulled her away from me and looked at her face. Her eyes were red and puffy from crying and her face was red. I held her until she quit crying.

"Tell me what is wrong Snowdrop," I said. "Tell me what is bothering you."

After she told me about her dream I stood up for the sun has risen and the white men were moving.

 

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Tag der Veröffentlichung: 05.04.2013

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