Fear

 

What is fear?

For I feel I have none

Is fear curable?

I face fear itself

Fear looks me in the eye

Can fear talk to you

Can fear be a person?

What is fear?

For I feel I have none

Is fear what you kiss goodnight?

Is fear a person you like?

What is fear?

For I feel I have none

Fear is when your mind tells you run

When you look a murderer right in the eye

Fear is when death is near

Leaving your house

I have fears

But I look them in the eyes and say bye

Written by Sierra Farmer

Fear Of What Is Here

Choices we all make

Decisions we all take

Results always show

Do we fear of what is here

We make our future

Decisions make results

Do we fear of what is here

We make things possible

Do we want what we did

Choices are part of life

What choice we make is our decision to take

Reality strikes you should not fear of what is here

sierra farmer

Shouts

In and out

Everybody stares

Really what a glare

Really what a stare

A clap here and there

Far away from finding herself

Angels or devils carrying me through life

Restlessly dancing and prancing through the pain

My mommy says keep on going

Everybody stares as I make a move

Really what a glare they share

am i living in a maze

I walk around trying to find my way out

I see a door with a lock and i pout

why can’t i see my way out

why does my mind keep my in doubt

I see a key to a door

but its up way above me

i feel weak and useless

Will i ever find my way out

i lock myself in this imaginary maze

will i ever get stronger and taller

will i ever reach that key

it’s up to me

will i ever escape this hell i face

it’s lifes turn to take

will i be bound forever by the dreams i hate

it’s just time to wait

bio poem

Sierra

adventurous, strong, fun, loving

Daughter of the best mom ever

Who loved writing, acting, and being with family

Who feared losing others, feared that people would feel sad, and who feared that I would not be able to help people

Who is a published poet and who works hard to improve my writing

Who wants to be a known writer and to be able to show people my true writing talents

Born and raised in Brooklyn

Farmer

bitch

Beautiful

Intelligent

To cool

Caring

Honest

Can I Escape The Ropes

i am bound by the ropes

they hold me still

then i look down there is nothing there

but i try to move but i’m stuck

what's wrong with me why is this happening

i am struggling to escape

why can’t i move

why do i feel like i am disappearing

i am here but why am i tied down

then sleep bounds me for my dreams make me hurt more

why am i being tortured what did i do

can i escape its hard

i’m trying but it is always here

these ropes won’t go i’m caged in

all the things i thought i was is leaving

my spirit is leaving

all i can feel is these ropes getting stronger

i am getting weaker how long can i take this

why can’t i break out of this shell

where is my strength

i’m searching trying to find my will

where am i

i am gone and searching for myself  

Depressed

Done

Expressed

Pain

Repressed

Extremely annoyed with life

Stressed

Said fine too many times

Expressed pain

Depressed

I Face The World

My world fades

I look up and I see darkness

I follow a path scared to death

Clouds of pain surround me

My head feeling weird

I fall down to realize

That I am no longer dreaming

The game is over the darkness fades

I still feel hazy

I’m lost in reality

I’m scared of what comes next

I slip in out of darkness

I just wish time will lay still

There’s confusion two paths to take

Which path should I take left right up or down

The paths are laid before me

I make a turn left to find the grave to all my hate

Then I turn right to find the graves of all my spite

I turn upwards to see the world before me

But when I go down I fall and feel fire flashing over me

Then I understand my fate

I know what is needed

Reality caught up to me I was panting

These paths taunted me but finally i know

It was so easy so simple

It was me.

Life Is A Puzzle

Life is a puzzle

With its curved pieces

Life is a puzzle

You decide what it looks like

Life is a puzzle

with its turns of fate

Life is a puzzle  

you create the picture

Life is your puzzle

You find the pieces and where to place them

Life is your puzzle

you just have to find the pieces

Life is my puzzle  

I take piece by piece to make my picture

You should do the same  

Love Is A Question

People together saying they love

but I stand there just looking

Do they know what love is?

Can you look and just know?

Do you believe in love at first sight?

I don’t

I believe no one knows love until they feel it

love is always a question to me

people believe in romance

but i just don’t understand

people would cry for people they say they love

Do they really know what love is?

I believe that you really know love when you feel it

I believe that love grows

like a flourishing flower in the sun

love never stops growing

you can see love but still not understand

love until you feel

you can’t feel something you don’t understand

and you won’t understand until you feel

Asthma Attack

That night what a sight

The scary light

Illuminating the fight

His chest was tight

Quite a fight and with a word in such height

What a night and what a fight

The sight of someone losing their light

Right then the lights got bright

He awoke and what a sight of someone losing their light

What a sight and what a night

Mean People

Mean people’s looks

Acidic feeling runs through you

Their stares turn you into stone

The little and big medusas

They glare until they burn you

You turn into coal

So hard no one can touch you

Hurt so hurt

Biggest shield protect you

From loved ones and hated

Forgets the sun everything dark

In a straight jacket

Trapped in your head

Escape does not even cross your mind

You hate the sun because

The night always overpowers it

Don’t understand life anymore

Hate comes and you believe

Everything people say

When you finally let go

There is no one there to catch you

Just a trampoline to bump you

Back to reality to live your

life

A whole new way

My Dreams Showed Me The Light

My dreams show me the light and the dark

I don’t wish for the dark

The light is beautiful

It grabs me and I see everything

I see what I am

I see the future

I just have to let go

Time to start living

Everything is in front of me

I could be anything

singer, actor, doctor, writer

Just got to let the light in

Wishing escape from the dark

Showed me everything

I don’t need the past

Future is what matters

Time to start living my life

It’s my body and life

It’s time to forgive the past

To step forward to find what's ahead of me

When I wake I realize that I have all I need in front of me

My Life Is A Maze

i’m in a maze

lost and trying to be found

where am i going

i can’t find happiness

why do these walls surround me

all these doors haunt me

these doors are all locked

where are the keys i want to get out

i got to leave and forget

i got to stop living in the past

but how when my past follows me

memories never leave

i lost myself in the fog of the past

my dreams come after me

i can’t seem to get out

im locked up in my shell

i feel like i’m in a straight jacket

but there is no key to unlock me

can I find my way out can i find my key

because i have to stop living in the past

but how

how is the question

Pain

People

Attitudes

Internal hurt

Never leaves us alone

School

Some

Cool

Hateful people

Oh my god

Oh my god

Lateness with no reasons

Waking Up

Do you hate waking up in the morning

The stressful thoughts in your head ruin your day

The room gets warm and the sun is dawning

So you want to just stay in your bed and just lay

My mom yells to get me out of the bed

I force the pillow down on my two ears

My mom says i’m a lazy sleepy head

She does not know about my childish fears

I hate the crispy cold air on my face

As I trudge to school in the rainy street

It’s not like school is a welcoming place

Worrying about the rumors i’ll meet

The day looms long and gloomy in my mind

I wish the days in school would treat me kind

Survive The Night

Will my poems ever light a smile

Make people happy

Will my poems ever change

I want to be happy

I wish that my poems can light up the night

Will the poems stop showing the pain and sadness

Can I ever forget move on and discover

Can I one day say I was a survivor

Of all the pain and aggravation

I was a survivor

The 4 words I would love to say

With my family surrounding me

I will be a survivor

Of the pain

I will bring happiness to people’s faces

I will light up the night with bright smiles

With my family I can conquer all  

With my family I could come out a

Survivor of the night

The Poet Behind The Poems

People stare and look

They snake their heads

They think they know me

People became a little nicer

They wanted to know a poet

I’m published

So what

I’m just 13 big deal

You say you want to be my friend

Yeah right

You don’t want to know the author behind the poems

You just want to see the writing and want more from me

Everyone used to ignore

Not think much of me used to be mean

But now that i’m published you seem to forget

I like writing thats it

I don’t want attention

I just want to fit in

I’m a writer and a thinker

I’m not tinker bell in a skinny dress

So i’m curvy and don’t have a sparkly clothes

Think of me like cinderella turns beautiful on that one special night

I’m not a hater i’m a lover

I’m not mean i’m nice

Don’t expect me to become a bully overnight

I am me and thats is all

So don’t treat me different because i won’t change at all

Tick Tock

Is it time

Tick tick

Can I leave?

When is it over?

Ring

One day done

Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday

Everyday is torture

Do I have to?

Noo I am sick

Please

Let me stay home

School

Staring at the clock

Getting more antsy during lunch

What’s going to happen today

Am I going to be the girl lurking with aids

Or the slut who has lost her virginity three times

Tick tick

Time for lunch

Time to see everyone laughing and smiling

All I feel like is crying

Slut with aids her lurks around all day

Holding in tears that will not fade

Ring

Another day done

But it starts all over again

Truth Or Lie

All the stress

What a mess

I just scream out in distress

I just stand there with my smile

Holding it in

Fading darker and darker into the abyss

I want to scream for help

but what do I need

The build up

am I ok

Why always that question?

Do you really care?

Do you really want to know?

I could answer honestly or just lie

Which would you rather?

The smile and i’m fine

or the no i’m not fine

I’m getting sick

Picking out every little thing I should say

Just a day I would like to say

the truth

anger, pain, sadness, stress

All these words describe how I am feeling

So no i’m not fine

Who’s That

I see a person in front of me

All black and dark

I see a person in front of me

Who could it be

It mirrors my movements

copying everything I do

I see a person in front of me

I stop moving looking closer

Oh my

I see a person in front of me

I see myself

I’m standing in front of a mirror

I see my reflection

I am  so shocked

This can’t be me who am I staring at

The color returns to my body

I realize who I am

I realize who I was

I see a person in front of me

Who happens to be me

Should It Matter

should it matter

Who I am

It doesn't matter if I'm black or white

should it matter to me

weather I am this or that

Should it matter to me weather I am

Gay, straight, bisexual

I think it matters

I get to confused

My family is cool

but

i don't know weather I am gay, straight, bisexual

I want to know

i want to be comfortable with who I am

but

who am I?

Questions

comfortable?

yes

Home?

yes

Happy?

Yes

Does sexuality change that?

No

Mom?

Yes

Loving family?

Yes

Friends?

Yes

Does being who you are change that?

No

Warmth?

Yes

Bed?

Yes

Confusion?

Yes

Should I be punished?

No

Different?

Yes

Weird?

Maybe

Cool?

Hopefully

I am who I am except it

Yes, No, Maybe

Hopefully

Whats A Poem

whats a poem

for it does not have to ryme all the time

whats a poem

for not all are the same

whats a poem

there are billions of different kinds

whats a poem to me

is what I see and feel

Whats a poem

Is what a writer believes is a poem

Whats a poem

Its a descriptive fun way of expressing non repressing way of writing

Writers Block

Words refuse to flow

The paper just grows

Thoughts on crumpled paper

Words are a no show

Emptiness

Wordless

Words with no meaning

Complications

Being so stuck

Words refuse to show

But with no end to my

Trying

Paper shrinks

Words begin to appear

Crumpled papers

Dissapear

So thin air

To represent the words

That refused to show

I am me I am Found

Haters-hate

Lovers-love

Beaters-beat

but what do i do?

Savers-save

Changers-change

Keepers-keep

so should i have to?

Discriminators-descriminate

Organizers-organize

Writers-write

Should i be confined to one classification?

Maybe i'm more than one

Or maybe i'm none

because

Haters-hate

Lovers-love

And

Beaters-beat

But I am me and 

I do me and I am

Not a hater nor a beater

I am purely my own

And my own is me

Impressum

Texte: sierra farmer
Tag der Veröffentlichung: 31.07.2013

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Widmung:
to all the people who made me feel so many different emotions