Prologue

 

“Tag you're it!”, shouted Emma.

I laughed and chased after her, my brown hair flying crazily in the wind behind me as I chased after my sister. Her strawberry blond curls blowing in the wind as she ran faster, her long legs bringing up dirt and mulch. Even though she was an inch taller than me, I could still easily outrun her. I pushed my legs to make me move faster until I was inches away from her. She turned around and squealed with laughter. I tagged her and was about to sprint off running the other way when Emma called for a break.

“Wait”, she said breathlessly, her hands on her knees. “Let's take a break, I wanna talk to you.”

“Ok!”

We both walked over to our favorite two swings. Emma claimed the blue one as her’s while I had the red one. We both sat down and automatically started to swing our legs slowly, letting them feel the late summer breeze. Emma looked up at the sky, the sun making her strawberry blonde hair shine gloriously.

“Y’know when we get to high school we are going to rule the school.”

That was Emma’s dream. Most thirteen-year-olds weren’t thinking about high school yet. They were either thinking about going to Justin Bieber concerts or crying about Zayn’s leaving One Direction. But no. Emma wanted to be Queen B once we arrived at High School.

“Yeah.”, I said. “Every guy will want to be with us and every girl will want to be us.”

We both laughed, but after a few minutes we fell quiet, listening to the sounds of the wind rustling the trees. Even though Emma was one year older than me, we were going to be in the same grade. I jumped slightly when I felt Emma’s hand touch mine. I looked up to see Emma looking at me. She looked sad.

“Carsyn, can you promise me something?”

“Of course. Anything for my big sis.”

Emma took a deep breath, it looked like she was going to cry. “Promise me, not matter what, that we’ll share this dream together. Please.” Emma was squeezing my hand painfully now. Even though I didn’t want her dream, well at least not as much as Emma did, I didn’t want to disappoint her, so I said: “Of course, Em.” I  interlaced our hands together and held them up to show Emma. “No matter what, I promise that we’ll be the hottest, popular girls in High School.” Emma smile returned and she squeezed my hand, less painfully, this time.

“I love you, Carsyn”

I smiled and said, “I love you too, Em”

In silence, we both swung in our favorite swings, our hands still interlaced.

New School, New Memories

 

The dream melted away as I blinked my eyes open. Out of all the things to dream of, why did I have dream of that memory? I swung my legs off the bed and felt something furry rub against my feet. Munchkin. Munchkin is my orange and white American Shorthair. She meowed and looked at me with her blue eyes.

“Hey pretty girl.”, I said. I leaned down and scratched under her belly, where she liked being scratched the most. She purred happily and followed me to the bathroom. I smiled as I remembered the day I got Munchkin. She was just a little kitten, mostly skin, and bones from her previous owner not feeding her properly, but when she looked at me with her big blue eyes, I instantly fell in love. I was six when I got her. Ever since then she’s been, my little baby. She meowed as I turned on the shower.

“Yes, yes I know. I don't want to go to school either, my little Munchkin. Maybe you could go and take my place.”

Munchkin looked at me and walked out of the bathroom. I laughed and followed her, walking into my walk-in closet. I flicked the light on and went over to the “red” section.

I picked up a red Of Mice & Men tank and black ripped skinny jeans. After I collected what I was going to wear, I grabbed a towel and went back to the bathroom. A few minutes later, while I was brushing my teeth, I was thinking about the Forbidden Dream, as I decided to call it. That was five years ago, when Emma and I, still had that strong sisterly bond.  I wonder if we can ever have that again…

My thoughts were interrupted by a pounding on the door that made me and Munchkin jump. Munchkin hissed at the door. No, she was hissing at the person at the door. Emma.

“Come on Carsyn! I am not  going to be late for my first day of the senior year because you're taking all day!”

“I'll be right out! Be patient for once.”

And after that, the thought of us having our bond again was gone. After I finished brushing my teeth, I put my hair up into a tight ponytail as I always do and stopped to look at myself in the mirror. Maybe I'm the reason her dream didn’t come true…

Emma wanted both of us to be the hottest girls in school and I screwed that up. I leaned into the mirror more, trying to get a better look at my features. I had long chocolate brown hair that reached the small of my back, light caramel skin, a plump heart shaped face, chubby cheeks, slightly arched eyebrows, long thick eyelashes, full red lips, and slightly slanted grey-blue eyes. I hated my eyes the most. Most people were fascinated by my eye color, but I hated them. They weren't normal. They weren't… beautiful. Neither am I, I thought. I didn’t have a flat stomach, instead, I had one of those “Slightly skinny, slightly not” bodies. I wasn’t skinny, and I wasn’t fat either. Just in the middle. I didn’t have those mile-long legs either. Instead, I had short, thick thighs. The only thing I didn’t totally lack in was the breast compartment. I wasn’t too heavy nor too small. I looked away from my not so perfect body and went downstairs.

Mom and dad were both at the kitchen table drinking coffee. Mom in her usual attire; high heels, and a tailored suit. My mom was the best realtor in North Jackson, a town we recently moved into in summer with the population of twenty thousand. In the short time we’ve been here, she already sold over one hundred houses. My dad was a vet, the job I wanted to have. But too bad she isn’t the best mom, I thought. I went to get my favorite Pop-Tart, Chocolate, when something snapped at my legs. I looked down and saw Pookie, my sister's feisty chihuahua.

“Ow! Pookie go!” I nudged the dog gently away with my foot, making him snap at my legs again.

“Pookie!”, my sister called.

I turned to see her running down the stairs, jumping off the second one and picking up her dog. He immediately calmed in her arms.

“Don’t touch Pookie!”, Emma shouted at me. She was wearing her usual attire. A tight light blue crop top that made her dark blue eyes look lighter, tight white short shorts that definitely did not  follow the dress code, and her naturally curly hair was flowing like water down to her elbows. I looked at her flat stomach and curvy long legs and wondered how we were ever related. Everyone wondered that too. At every school I heard “How come one sister's hotter than the other one?” and “Are they seriously sisters?” and “She must be adopted.” But over time I got used to it, and seeing the contrast between us, I started wondering too. Especially about the adopted question.

“Carsyn”, my mom said, finally realizing my presence, snapped at me. “Are you really wearing that for your first day of senior year?”

I sighed. It was always like this. My parents never noticed me. They only noticed Emma. The beautiful daughter. The popular daughter. The Perfect daughter. I always seemed like the Invisible Girl to them.

“Yes, mother I'm wearing this to school.” I wanted to add if you don’t like it then build a bridge and get over it, but, of course, I didn’t. I didn’t feel like going to school in a bad mood today over an argument about clothes. Mom rolled her eyes and took a sip from her coffee mug and turned to Emma. Her eyes sparkled with love and admiration, something mom hasn’t looked at me with in a long time.

“Oh, Emma you look very nice today. If only your sister could learn from you..”

“She’ll never learn mother. Besides, she can’t be as flawless as me.”

They kept talking like I wasn’t in the room. And that hurt the most. Way more than them talking about how I'm not the most beautiful girl they've ever seen. I turned my back to them as if to make their words melt away easier and started to open my Pop-Tart when mom’s voice stopped me.

“Carsyn, I forgot to tell you, your Father and I have decided to limit your intake to food. I- I mean we think it’s best if you slow down on your food. Just in case by the end of the year, you can’t fit into your graduation gown.”

Of course, this wasn’t a parent decision, it was mom’s decision. I didn’t turn around to face them. I couldn’t. I felt my face get hot and I heard Emma snicker but didn’t try very hard to cover it up with a cough. I could taste tears at the back at my throat and the wetness build at the back of my eyes, but I pushed them down violently. I will not let them see me cry. I will not give them the satisfaction. So I shoved my Pop-Tart back in its box. Turned, making sure none of them saw my face and went to the closet to grab my Harley Quinn bookbag.

“I'll drive myself to school.”, I mumbled as I grabbed my keys off the pegs near the door. As I opened the door behind me I heard from Emma say, “Good, I won't have to be seen with you at school and there will be more room in the car.” I sighed and slammed the door shut and started walking down the steps to my red Mustang Convertible and stopped in front of the car. Memories were rushing back to me. Back before we moved, me and my friends having played Bring Me The Horizon’s new album That’s The Spirit and us laughing as I sped down the empty highway at three in the morning. When I came back from the memories I found myself smiling as opened the car door. As I got into the car, I wished I could still talk to my old friends. But mother, no Carrie, as I took to calling her when I wasn’t at home, said they were bad influences on me. As I put the keys in the ignition, I thought, new school, new memories.

Meeting Ryder Williams

 

I parked my car in an empty parking space near the school’s entrance. The school didn’t start until seven-ten and it was already six thirty, so most of the parking spaces were empty.  There were a few other students at the school, though, standing next to their cars, but not many. I reached over and grabbed my book bag and opened my car door. I stepped out of the car and that’s when it- no rather he- happened. I heard a loud rumbling noise, growing louder and louder. Soon, a red Harley Heritage Softail (and yes I know my motorcycles) pulled into a parking space a few spaces down from where I was parked. I watched as the boy swung a long leg over the bike. Once the boy was off the bike, he reached his arms up to take off his helmet. In those moments, it felt like I was waiting a lifetime to see the boys face. My heart was beating fast and my mouth was dry.

In slow motion, the boy took his helmet off and when he did, my legs went to jelly and I had to lean up against my car for support.  He was..he was hot! After removing his helmet, the boy shook his raven black shoulder length hair, making it look even messier if that was even possible. His skin was the color of melted gold. He had a strong stubborn jaw, an oval-ish face with a small narrow nose. Even from where I was standing I could tell that he had long thick eyelashes and full red lips and dangerous round hazel eyes.

As my eyes made their descent, practically drinking him in, I noticed that he was wearing a black leather jacket, and under that, a black t-shirt that showed off the hard muscles underneath. As my eyes continued to travel down, I saw that he was wearing jeans that hung loosely off his hips. The boy was about 6’1. Involuntarily, I licked my lips and looked up and stopped dead. The guy was staring directly at me. Oh great, I thought. Now he thinks you're a huge creep. But he wasn’t grossed out, at least he didn’t look grossed out, instead, he was staring intensely at me. His hazel eyes looked glazed over slightly and his lips were parted.

I stared back at him, unable to look away, then I noticed movement from the motorcycle. It was a girl. And she was beautiful. How come I'm just now noticing her? Oh yeah. I was checking out the guy. The girl must have said something because the guy stopped staring at me and turned his hazel eyes to the girl getting off the bike. He helped her off and my heart sank. Of course, he has a girlfriend. Why wouldn't he?

The girl was just as stunning as her boyfriend. She had long black hair, her tips dyed red. She had silky ivory skin and a small plump face, a small cute button nose, and round clear blue eyes that sparkled like the ocean itself and was laced with black eyeliner, and an hourglass form. Flawless. Perfect. In the back of my head, I heard Emma’s voice say, “Everything you aren’t”. I shoved Emma’s voice, (The Demon as I liked to call it), to the back of my mind.

Now in a bad mood, I pulled my bookbag more onto my shoulder and start to walk into the school. Daring one more look over at the boy and his girlfriend, I noticed that he was still staring at me, completely ignoring his girlfriend, who was talking and motioning with her hands. I stopped walking, caught in the guy's stare again, and finally realizing that her boyfriend wasn’t paying her any attention, she turned and looked at him. The girl followed his eyes and then found me. Oh no. Wait. What? Is she smiling? I tore my gaze away from the couple and started walking, nearly running, for the school.

Now there were more students arriving, some sitting on the steps and talking, and others heading inside to get breakfast. My stomach rumbled at the mention of breakfast, but I ignored it. Instead, I took out my schedule and walked up the stairs to where the Senior classes were being held. There was no one in the Senior’s hallway, so I went and found my locker number. I opened my locker and placed my bookbag inside, taking out my notebook and some pencils for my first block, Honors English 3. I closed my locker and took my own lock out and securely locked it in place in my locker. I closed and squealed loudly. There was a boy leaning up against the locker next to mine. Wait. No. My heart squeezed as I realized who the boy was. It was him. The boy from the motorcycle. He had his arms crossed over his broad chest. Up close, they looked even better. I shook myself internally and reminded myself that he had a girlfriend. I forced my eyes away from his chest and looked into his eyes, which was an even worse idea. His hazel eyes were more gold than brown and green. They drew me in and held me there. He was so beautiful, and dangerous, like a lion hunting for his prey. Since I couldn't look at his face or his body without being entranced, I decided to look at the wall, the lockers, the floor, anything, but him. Then he spoke. His voice was deep, but sounded smooth and silky, too.

“Hi.”

I licked my dry lips and smiled. “Hi.”

I winced at the sound of my voice, it sounded like I was dying of dehydration. But, to my surprise and luck, he didn’t notice.

“I'm Ryder. Ryder Williams.”, Ryder held out a hand to me.

Oh. The name even sounded hot. And bad. A good name for a bad boy.

“Carsyn. Carsyn Brooks. Nice to meet you.”, I took his hand and shook it. But when we finished shaking hands, he didn’t drop my hand, he kept holding it.

I looked up at him, and again, realized he had a girlfriend. Why was I always forgetting that very important detail, I have no idea? I took my hand from his, reluctantly, and looked up and down the still empty hallway.

“So, um, where's your girlfriend?”. I choked on the last word. Ryder looked at me with his beautiful and dangerous eyes, a confused look in them.

“What are you talking about?”

Oh great. He’s one of those guys. The players. I scowled, which caught him by surprise. “The girl who got off the bike. That girlfriend.”

Ryder's face transformed. First, he still had that confused look on his face, then he seemed to register what I said, then he smiled, a smile that warmed my entire body, and then he was laughing. What was so funny?

“You think Scarlett is my girlfriend?”, Ryder choked out, still laughing.

“Yeah. Well..isn’t she?”. Hope rose in my chest.

Ryder stopped laughing, his face going all serious. I had crane my neck just to look him in the eyes.

“No. Scarlett isn’t my girlfriend. She’s a childhood friend, were very close.”

Oh was the only response I could give as my cheeks started to grow hot. Ryder, of course, noticed and smiled, then he saw my schedule in my hands. He took it without asking and read it, a smile that reached his eyes spread across his face and into his eyes.

“I'm a senior too and we share first, third and fourth block. Which is Math 4 and P.E.” Ryder handed me back my schedule and held out his arm.

“Shall I escort you to class, M’lady?”, Ryder did a terrible British accent and I giggled.

“Yes sir, you shall.” I wrapped my arm around his and smiled. I thought maybe, just maybe, the school year wouldn't be so bad after all.

The Populars

 

The Populars

After Ryder showed me around the Seniors Hall before Advanced History and then showed me where my second block class would be, we meet up in the hallway for A lunch. As I walked up to him, he flashed me a sparkling smile that made my stomach flop. “Well hello there.”, Ryder said. “Hey.” I smiled up at him as we started our trek to the cafeteria. “So, how was your first class at at a new school?”, Ryder asked as he lifted a black eyebrow.

“It was pretty good. There was this girl who said she liked my shirt.” Ryder nodded and looked down to read the band's name on my shirt. “Ah, Of Mice & Men that ba-” I cut Ryder off as I stopped abruptly in the hallway. Ryder stopped with me and looked down at me with a perplexed expression on his face.

“What's wrong?” Ryder asked. I turned toward Ryder, purposely putting my back to who I hoped didn't look over and see me. In a hurried whisper I said, “Is there another way to the cafeteria?” Ryder quirked an eyebrow up, and then looked behind me. Smiling softly, he turned me around and slung his muscular arm over my shoulders, pulling me close to his side. The move made my stomach do a small flip, but when he walked us closer to what I was clearly trying to avoid, my nerves shot up tenfold.

As we walked, Ryder leaned down in my ear and whispered, “Relax. There's nothing to be afraid of.” Yeah that's what you think, but you haven't met my sister, I thought bitterly as we were in plain sight of the group where my sister was huddled in, talking with three girls, two of the girls looked similar, twins maybe?, and two other guys. Both had brown hair, but one of the guys was black with long dreads to his shoulders, while the other boy was white and had thick brown hair. Thankfully Emma had her back to us, but the guy was facing toward us, and when he saw us, well more like Ryder, his face scrunched up like something smelled bad and tapped the non-twin girl on the shoulder, pointing our way.

The non-twin girl looked over Emma's shoulder and at the sight of Ryder, her face scrunched up unattractively too. I looked up at Ryder, but he strode forward, a smirk on his full lips. Wondering who they were targeting their hatefulness towards, Emma turned around and her dark blue eyes locked on me. A hateful smirk touched her perfect lips as we were stopped by the guy with brown hair, him stepping in our way as we tried to walk past.

“Hello there Ryder.”, the guy said. Ryder smiled politely up at the guy as if they were old pals.

“Hello Sam.” As the guys stared at each other with ice in their stares, my sister kept her cold dark gaze on me. But when Ryder spoke, her eyes lifted to his face, and then traveled slowly down his body, then back up to his face. Emma bit her lip and made a noise of approval. Oh goodie, my sister has claimed her next victim.

During his stare down with Sam who was slightly attractive with an Ivy League hairstyle, classic nose, mischievous emerald eyes and a slight muscular build, however not as muscular as Ryder in my opinion.

However as he scowled at Ryder, that attractiveness was dialed down to an eight to a five very quickly. He was the type of person who was never told no growing up and pushed people around just for the fun of it. And I could tell all this about him when I haven't even been near him for more than five minutes.

My sister stepping forward in Ryder’s direction, held out her hand and batted her thick eyelashes. “Hi my name is Emma Br-”, Emma cut herself off at our last name, flicked a glance at me, and started over. “Im Emma Braxton, and you should be honored to meet me.”

Emma always did this with boys. She thought boys should be honored to be with her, not for her to be with them. Ryder looked down at me and I shrugged, familiar with my sister antics.

Ryder chuckled softly and looked back up to my sisters awaiting hand. Instead of kissing her hand like she expected him to, Ryder gave her the dead-fish handshake. Before I could stop myself, I let out a small chuckle.

Emma snapped her head over at me and shot me an angry glare. I immediately stopped talking and hung my head, away from her dark gaze. She cleared her throat and tossed her strawberry blond locks over her shoulder and using her Seductress voice said, “If you're looking for a real and beautiful woman, you can call me.”

Emma shot me a triumph smirk as Ryder took the piece of paper with her number on it. Emma never ran out of papers with her number on it, they were like business cards to her. Ryder looked down at the piece of paper and balled it up in his fist, making Emma lose her triumph smirk.

“Thanks for the offer but,”Stopping to look at me. “I rather have a girl who looked like the gollum from Lord of the Rings, then have a girlfriend who treated other people like crap.”

Then he quickly added, “Not to compare you to a gollum.” “Whose comparing who to a gollum?”, a voice asked. And that's when he walked up. As the guy rounded the corner, Ryder tensed up beside me. I looked up at Ryder questioningly then over to see a beautiful guy walking up with an equally beautiful girl on his arm. I know it isn't really typical to call a guy beautiful, but that was the best adjective to describe him.

The guy was greeted happily by the group, and while Sam slapped him on the back and pointed his thumb to us, I couldn't take my eyes off him. While Ryder pulled off the dark, bad-boy type of style, this guy was like his complete opposite. While Ryder had dark untamable hair, he had platinum blond neatly styled hair. I didn't really like guys with the comb-overs like the type he had, but he made it look good. And oh his eyes! They were so beautiful. They weren't like Emma’s dark and cold blue eyes. Instead they were a lighter shade and had a playful glint in them. But… was I the only one seeing this?

While there were still playfulness in his blue depths, his eyes also held a little bit of sadness in them… maybe I was just seeing things. Besides this guy was obviously popular in this group and had a stellar girl on his arm, who I just know remembered was there. So… what would he have to be sad about?

As my eyes continued their descent, I noticed that his face was nicely tanned, not like my sister who had her tan airbrushed before school, but naturally tan. He had sharp cheekbones, a strong nose, and soft looking pink kissable lips. Although they weren't as plump as Ryder’s his lips still looked scrumptious.

My eyes traveled farther down to look at his body, I noticed that he had a smaller frame than Ryder did, but still had his fair share of muscles and i'm pretty sure rock hard abs. Is build was similar to a basketball player build would be… hmm...that made wonder if he played sports. As I was gawking at the guy, I hadn't noticed Ryder’s grip on my shoulder starting to tighten and him trying to steer me away from the group. Shaken from my check out of the boy, I looked up to the guys face… to find him staring back at me.

He looked looked like he was having trouble breathing, his chest was moving up and down fast while his lips were parted slightly, and he had this slightly animalistic look in his eye as he stared at me.

I felt my face heat and my cheeks fill with color as his eyes left mine to track down my body.

Wherever he looked at me, I felt my body heat up as if his gaze was burning me alive. Before his eyes could rest on my eyes again, Ryder had successfully pulled me away from the group. Away from the guy. I hope no one saw us mentally undressing each other, I prayed to myself. As Ryder silently dragged me away from the group, I felt a pair of eyes on the back of my head, thinking it was the guy, I spared a glance back behind me. Instead of finding light blue orbs staring at me, I locked eyes with cold and dark blue ones. My sister's eyes.

Alex

“Not to compare who to a gollum?”, Alex asked while rounding the corner to where his group waited for him and his girlfriend for lunch. Everyone whipped around to look at him, Sam, Alex’s childhood best friend, clapped him on the back and shot him a smirk and lifted his thumb, pointing it in front of him. Alex looked to where Sam was pointing to and locked eyes with Ryder, the person who he hated.

Alex knew it was a strong word, but that's the only word he could use to describe his feelings for him. And by the look on Ryder’s face, he felt the exact same way because when they locked eyes, Ryder instantly tensed up. His face, displaying an expression of playfulness, now was stone cold. Showing no emotion to Alex. And as Alex glared back at the boy, he noticed that Ryder’s arm was draped across someone's shoulders.

Shifting his gaze to the person next to Ryder, Alex’s felt his breath leave him. This girl was absolutely beautiful. And why she was hanging out with someone like Ryder, he had no clue. Was she dating him? I've never seen her before… maybe they started going out over the summer? Just the thought of Ryder having someone who looked like that on his shoulder made him want to growl and reach over and grab the beautiful creature from Ryder.

He shoved  the desire away quickly. But wow, this girl was stunning. She had straight chocolate brown hair that looked soft to the touch and would cascade down her shoulders if she wore it down out of her neat ponytail. Alex suddenly had the strong urge to take her hair out of the ponytail and run his hands through her hair. Again, he shoved the desire away.

She had a plump heart shaped face with adorably pinchable chubby cheeks. And-oh god- those lips! Oh those full pink kissable lips. Time seemed to slow as Alex’s heart seemed to beat faster and harder in his chest as he thought about kissing those lips. What am I thinking?, Alex thought. I have a girlfriend, I shouldn't be thinking about kissing another girl. But although though he-unsuccessfully- tried to stop thinking about those lips dancing across his, Alex just couldn't stop himself. She was just too gorgeous for his eyes to wander anywhere else.

As Alex’s eyes continued their trek down her face, he noticed that the girl was staring at him too! Her eyes were slowly taking him in, from head to toe. As if she was sensing  someone looking at her, her eyes locked with Alex’s. Her eyes were absolutely stunning, Alex thought. They were a mesmerizing grey-blue that could engulf you and make you feel like you were tumbling down into and endless storm.

Alex wanted to jump into those depths and get lost into the storm of her eyes forever. As Alex’s eyes started to steadily travel down her body, his heart started to thump painfully harder, threatening to push through his ribcage and his chest. Her body… words couldn't describe how her body made Alex feel. Even though most guys liked their girls nice and skinny like twigs, Alex did not. But she wasn't “fat” either, not like that would be a problem for Alex. She had curves in all the right places. Alex looked back up to her face to find her staring back at him. Oh no, Alex thought. She saw me checking her out and she's embarrassed.

Before Alex could hastily look away, Ryder pulled the girl away down to the cafeteria doors and, thankfully, away from him. Alex drew his gaze away from the girl's retreating back and hoped no one saw, especially his girlfriend,  the silent exchange between the girl and him. But when Alex happened to look over, his eyes locked with a pair of dark blue eyes. Those dark, calculating blue eyes were staring from Alex to the girl with a look of curiosity and suspension. The pair of dark eyes belonged to the new girl who quickly joined their small group. Emma.

Impressum

Texte: Sara Rose
Bildmaterialien: Google
Lektorat: Sara Rose
Übersetzung: Google
Tag der Veröffentlichung: 24.04.2016

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