Prologue

Is it so easy to forget your first love?

I don’t think so…

There is a lot of pain, tears, craziness and heartbreak involved….

It feels like your heart is shattered into thousand pieces and you cannot put it back together…..

You might feel I am exaggerating but this is what I felt….

I wonder how people easily hook up with others leaving behind their first love…… Are they putting up an act? Are they so strong? Am I the weak one? I don’t know…

All I know is I am still in pain……

The move

 

“Coming mom” I shouted. My house is a mess right now. We are moving to a relatively remote place called La Pine in Oregon from the plush suburbs of Manhattan. I didn’t want to leave my friends, my neighborhood and the city. It has all my childhood memories, from the happiest to the most embarrassing ones. My favorite food points, the bookstores, the really quite park behind my house. I have to leave everything behind and go to an entirely anonymous place and find the new me…..

I am Kiara Jackson and I prefer Kia. I am an average 17 year old girl with a waist length dark brown hair, striking green eyes that look almost black and a pale complexion. I am practically an unsocial girl who is mostly in the world of books. I just have two best friends Emily Stark and Kaylee Stark. They are twins and opposites of each other. Emi is a social butterfly while Kay is just like me. We have been friends since first grade. They were with me through my every endeavor and now it pains me to leave them behind. But life has to go on. My mom Rachel is a renowned environmental scientist and a very bright, cheerful person. She was mostly away from home so I grew up alone. I lost my dad when I was 11. He was a successful lawyer in New York and a very loving person. I got his eyes, hair and personality. It took me 2 years to come out of that trauma. Since then my mom has been my everything.

My mom got this very good opportunity to be on the board of scientists working on the national environment movement, so we had to leave for la pine which in the heart of nature.

I dodged all the stuff scattered and went downstairs to my mom.

“Oh my gosh Kia, I just got a call and I had to leave for a meeting. Can you please take care of the packing? I’m so sorry to leave you alone with this mess honey” she was flustered about all this so I had to assure her. “It’s okay mom. Relax. I’ll take care of the stuff here. I’ll ask Emi and Kay to come over, so don’t worry. Just go.” “Oh I’m so proud of you honey. I’m really sorry and I’ll be back as fast as possible. Bye.” She kissed me bye scurried away. I shrugged at her childishness dialed Kay’s number. “Hey Kay, can you come over to my house? I need help in packing.” “We’re coming right away Kia” she said and I hung up.

After 4 hours of pulling, pushing and yelling, we finally managed to finish the packing. The movers took away all the stuff. The house felt so empty. The reality started to sink in. I am leaving this place tomorrow. “Guys I ordered some pizza and cokes” said Emi. Her voice echoed through the house and she started singing getting astonished with her own echo. I chuckled and looked at Kay who had ‘ I cannot believe she is my sister’ look.

The pizza came and we sat down to have it. “So” said Emi, “Soo” prolonged Kay and “Soooo” I shrugged. We all started laughing. After we calmed down there was this annoying silence. Kay cleared her throat and began “Kia…”, I knew this was going to come and I managed a barely audible “umm”. “I know this is hard on you Kia but this is life. You can never make out how every second unfolds. Just remember whatever choices you make, just follow your heart. Life is not just happiness but sadness and pain to. So let the life go on itself and you just enjoy it. You are a strong girl and no matter what we are always with you. We love you baby” tears strolled down her face. I didn’t realize that even I was crying. In a matter of time we were hugging each other tightly and were crying. I don’t know for how long we were like that. Emi pulled out and gave her very Emilyish smirk. A smile spread on our faces. “So Miss Kiara Jackson for god sake start putting on some makeup and check out your surroundings. Go flirt and have a wild life. I heard boys there in Oregon are those sexy Indies. My god you can have a very good time” she was grinning. “Uhh please Emi” I and Kay screamed in unison.

We were chattering about all the impossible stuff while my mom came in. Even though she is exhausted from her work she still has this bright smile plastered to her face. “Hello beautifuls.. How was your day?” she enquired. “It was wonderful Mrs. Jackson” replied my friends. She gave them chocolates. It has been the same since my first grade. Every time Emi and Kay came over she gave them chocolates. This made me smile. My friends hung out with me till their curfew and went home. We had a bit of teary farewell. My mom was on phone talking seriously. “What’s the matter mom” I asked. “Its nothing much Kia I just came to our flight to Portland is rescheduled to tomorrow morning at 9. We have to leave early”. “oh cool” was all I could manage. My mom gave me a comforting smile. I kissed her good night and went to sleep. I couldn’t sleep peacefully. Tomorrow would be a long day I sighed.

La Pine

 

It is 7 in the morning and all the luggage was put in the car trunk. I was staring at my house when my mom came and wrapped her arms around enveloping me in her warm embrace. “It’s time honey”. I sighed and took one last departing look and sat in the car. All the way to the airport I was looking out of the window taking in every bit of this place that I can see. I’m going to miss Manhattan.

It was 5 hour journey from New York to Portland. We got a car there and it took us about 4 hours to reach La Pine. The drive to La Pine was very excruciating. It took every ounce of my self control not to breakdown. It was dark by the time we reached our house. Though it is all dark I liked the outlook of it. It is in surrounded by a garden was adjoining the woods. It was quiet and peaceful. We went inside. The packed boxes were awaiting us. It is a 3 bed roomed 2 storied house. There was a big living room, a dining hall, kitchen and one bedroom downstairs. There were 2 bedrooms and a beautiful balcony upstairs. It was beautiful and cozy. I took the bedroom upstairs with the balcony overlooking the woods. We had our dinner quietly and I went off to sleep.

I woke up to my alarm in the morning. I finished my morning routine took a shower and put on khaki shorts and a black tank and went downstairs. I’m still having my vacation left. The school wouldn’t start in about 2 weeks. It is a long time. I have to find a bookstore. Thinking about all the possible ways to spend my remaining vacation, I went into kitchen to fix breakfast when I caught a note stuck on the fridge. ‘Kia, had to go to work early. Meet you tonight. Love you. Mom.’ I sighed. I got back to fixing breakfast when I realized the cabinets were empty. I made a mental note to go for the grocery shopping. I ate snickers I had in my backpack and started to unpack stuff. It was one in the afternoon by the time I finished arranging everything. My stomach started to growl. I called my mom “Hey mom, there’s no food in the house so…” I trailed. “Yes, I know Kia, so I left you a car. The keys are on my dresser and you’ll find a map there. Go out and enjoy”. “Thanks mom. Bye.” I hung up. Sometimes my mom is really thoughtful. I smiled and changed into black jeans and grey blouse. I took the keys and the map and headed out.

I felt La Pine is a very beautiful and quiet place while I was driving around. It is green and lively. I stopped at a restaurant that I found while driving to the grocery. Just like the town it is beautiful and cozy. There was an elderly woman at the counter. She gave me a warm smile when I came in. “How can I help you dear?” she enquired. She sounded really kind. “Can I get a medium chicken burger with French fries and coke please” I responded. “Right away dear” she said and went inside. I sat in the first booth and awaited my order. She came with the tray in 10 minutes. I started to eat. “So you must be new to the town. ‘M Grace by the way” she introduced herself. “Oh I’m Kia Jackson and yeah, me and my mom just moved in” I replied. We had quite a talk and she told me about the town, the people and the traditions. She even told me where the different stores were. I thanked her and set out on my ‘journey’ to the grocery store. I started loving this place more than I thought I would. The people were really nice and kind. I chuckled at the thought of me mingling with the people and continued driving.

First sight

 

I finally made it to the grocery store and pulled out my car into the parking lot. I was about to park in the vacant spot I found when suddenly a black Porsche came speeding out of nowhere and parked in the place I was about to park. I hit the break hard to avoid collision and lurched forwards and hit the steering. I was really mad with whoever was in that car. He or she would have caused an accident! I came out of the car, and “What are you thinking of yourself?” I yelled.

For the first few seconds it seemed as if there was no one in the car. Because the door didn’t open. But the next moment, I was gawking at something – or rather someone – I had never laid my eyes on.

He was tall and lean but muscular. He’s got copper colored hair that looked dishelved yet sexy. It made me want to run my fingers through it. He was fair with flawless skin, sculpted nose and perfect lips. He had on sunglasses, so I couldn’t see his eyes. He was dressed in a black buttoned up shirt with the first to buttons open and the sleeves rolled up to the elbows. He complemented the shirt with a pair of dark blue jeans and black sneakers. He looked so boyish yet manly, formal yet casual. I realized I was staring at him and put my head down in embarrassment. I must have flushed tomato red by now. I shook my head, took a deep breath and remembered my purpose.                                                                                        

“You could’ve killed!! Should’ve at least honked!!” I ranted.

 “Do you have any ide….” I was cut in mid sentence.

“You are still alive though and undamaged if I specify.”

 His voice was enchanting. Before I could remind myself to breathe, he pushed me into my car, slammed the door shut and walked away with a smirk on his face. Or it must have been a smile? Arrgh I don’t know. It all happened so fast that one second I was yelling and in the other, I was shut in my own car!! Rage started to consume me.

“That was so rude. What a brat.” I thought.

I was annoyed throughout my shopping. I brought a child to the verge of tears when he politely asked me to help him get the chocolate on the higher rack. I felt really guilty for that. I usually prefer to be alone when I’m angry. I inherited this character from my dad. Whenever I get angry, I go into my room and lock it. My mom and friends know not to bother me when I lock the room. I take my time to calm down and when I come out from the room I’m the same old Kia who is cool and calm.

I finally got all the groceries I needed and proceeded to pay. The guy at the counter winked at me. I think I heard someone growl behind me. ‘What am I imagining??’ I started to get annoyed with myself too. I quickly paid him and got out of the store into the fresh air.

It started to drizzle, so I widened my stance and paced towards my car. I involuntarily scanned the parking lot for the black Porsche. It was still there. How come I didn’t run into him while I was shopping I wondered. My brain was yelling ‘Are you crazy, he was so rude to you, stop thinking about him.’ I sighed and headed to my car.

Throughout the drive I was really disturbed. Even the climate didn’t help. It was raining heavily. I’m more of a winter and spring person. So I was fuming by the time I reached home. I parked the car in the garage and sprinted into the house to avoid getting wet. I succeeded in not getting wet. The house was warm. I arranged the groceries I bought in their rightful places and went into my room.

I took a hot shower to let down today’s stress. I don’t know for how long I was in the shower, but when I finally came out I felt a lot better. I went down and made a hot mug of coffee and went into my balcony. It stopped raining and the sun was almost down. It was twilight, a beautiful one. I smiled and savored my coffee. It was a perfect moment. I finished my coffee and was about to go in when something caught my attention. Something black, may be a car, was going through the woods. I wondered why someone would go into the woods at this hour.

I picked out Rebecca from my bookshelf and started reading it. I didn’t notice how quickly the time passed away until my stomach started to growl. I kept the book aside and looked at my phone. It was already half past nine. I hurried down and fixed myself dinner. I was halfway through my eating when I heard a car pullover into the driveway. After five minutes I was greeted with my mom’s cheerful voice.

“Hey Kia, how was your day? Oh you didn’t finish your dinner yet? Isn’t it late? Are you alright honey?” she started bombarding me with the questions.

“Mom, relax, take a deep breath. I’m totally fine. I just lost the track of time while I was reading. And my day was….” I paused thinking of that rude guy and then added “fine”.  

“Oh, good. So did you like the place.” She looked hopeful.

“Yeah. I really I liked it.” I told her truthfully. Her face brightened. “I know you would love it. It’s just so perfect...” she started her monologue. Though I finished my dinner I sat through my mom’s summary of her day. I nodded and ‘oh’ed when needed. I got up when she finished. She said she would do the dishes so I kissed her good night and went upstairs to my room. I brushed my teeth, changed into my sweats and snuggled on to the bed under the comforter. Within minutes the sleep consumed me.

Friend

 

 “Beeeeep” I woke up to the alarm.

I got down from the bed and went into the balcony and I basked in the morning sun. It was so peaceful and beautiful. I don’t know for how long I’ve been there drinking in the beauty of the morning. Finally I started to get cold so I had to get inside. I finished my morning routine and took a shower. I put on blue jeans and a white blouse and got downstairs. I made scrambled eggs, filled the glass with orange juice and began eating in silence. Suddenly my phone pinged and I felt delighted when I saw it is from Kay.

“Hey Kia, wassup? Are you liking it there? Mrs. Jones just called to inform that ‘Jane Eyre’is back in stock. I hope you would finally manage to find your copy there. Everything’s just normal here.

Love you”

I felt really bad ‘coz every time I went to get that book, it was, “sorry we don’t have it”, “out of stock” or “someone took it”. I feel so ridiculous that I couldn’t find a book in the huge New York! That frustrates me. Though the chances are very slim, I’ll try searching for it here.

M fine Kay. It’s beautiful here. Thanks for telling me. I guess I’ll find it here. 

Love you too.”

I texted Kay back and cleared up the table. I took my jacket and headed out to find the bookstore.

After searching for an hour I finally managed to find one. It is named Paddy’s Corner. I chuckled at the weird name. Not just the name but the bookstore too was weird. It looked like an oversized tree house only that, it is not perched up on any tree. It looked way too ‘natural’. On the whole it gave off an ancient aura. I wonder if I would even find twilight at this place. I sighed and went inside.

I had to remind myself to close my mouth once I was in. It was nothing like what I thought of. With the dim yellow lighting and many shelves filled with books, it looked like a library at an ancient palace. It is so beautiful that you wouldn’t want to leave that place. I was greeted by a smiling elderly woman. She probably understood the shock on my face and gave me a toothy grin.

“How can I help you dear” she asked very politely.

“I was wondering if I could find Jane Eyre by Charlotte Bronte here…” I trailed waiting for her answer. I had my fingers crossed.

“There’s just one copy of it and you would find it in the gothic section upstairs in the 15th lane”

I almost shrieked of happiness and ran upstairs. I was rushing past the bookshelves until I came to the 15th lane. I scanned all the books in the shelf and I finally found what I wanted. Immediately I grabbed the book to rush down only to be stopped in my tracks. I spun around and met with a pair rather 2 pairs of eyes. He was holding onto my book.

“I got it first” I protested. I cannot lose this chance of getting that book.

“But I saw it first” he retorted.

We glared at each other in silence for few minutes. Then I finally gave up and came with a solution.

“How about I buy the book first, finish reading it and lend you after 3 days. Please say yes ‘coz I’ve been searching like crazy for this book” I used my best pleading eyes. His stare softened and sighed, giving up. I mentally celebrated.

“I’m Sean Whalen by the way, junior at La Pine High” he extended his hand.

“I’m Kiara Jackson, junior at La Pine High and new to this town” I smiled and shook his hand.

We lost the track of time while talking to each other. I told him about my move, my love for books, my old place my family and friends. He promised to show me around this town and told about himself, the school and this place. At the end I found out we both had insanely similar taste. I was glad I found someone just like me and moreover a friend in this new place. We exchanged our numbers and set off for our homes.

After I got home I fixed myself dinner and ate it in silence. After I finished, I cleaned the dishes and went upstairs. I took a warm shower, changed into my sweats, brushed my teeth and got into ed. I started reading the book I finally found after a long search.   

D-Day

 

Finally, the day I dreaded the most came. ‘The first day of school’. I’ve always been uncomfortable with people, so first days are really hard. I just can’t put up with the staring and I sometimes get panicky and clumsy.

The past two weeks flew by. I spent a lot of time with Sean, exploring the town, going hiking and reading in the library. Sean is almost similar to me except in that, he is very social and jovial. He smiles and interacts with people a lot. I was surprised to find out that such a person didn’t have a best friend. “Selflessness is almost a non existing trait” he replied when I questioned him about that. That moment I felt, his playfulness is just a façade to cover up his scars and I decided to be that one selfless person he needs.

I’m looking forward for a better start today as I have Sean by my side to make the so called ‘first day of school’ less awkward. Thinking, I showered and put on light blue shirt with dark washed jeans and a black cardigan. I kept my hair down in loose waves and finished the outfit with white sneakers. I took my bag, my phone and got down to have breakfast. I was shocked to see the breakfast set on the table with a note beside it. It read,

“Since it’s your first day of school, I know you’d be nervous. So I made you breakfast. Have a great day honey.

Love,

Mom”.

A smile crept on my face and I happily munched on the food my mom made. I washed the dishes after I finished, grabbed the keys of my Mazda and set out for the school. It is a fifteen minute drive from my house.

The school parking lot was bustling with life. Friends catching up with each other after a long vacation, people pulling pranks, reunited couples, it was all crowded. I found a spot and parked my car. After I got out, my eyes met with an ecstatic Sean waving from across the lot. I quickly strode towards him.

“Hey Kia! How are you girl? Ready for the school? Come on, I’ll take you to the school’s office and let’s get our schedule sorted.” He said.

I just smiled and replied with a nod.

Soon we found ourselves in the school’s office. The receptionist was busily organizing the papers when Sean greeted her,

“Morning Mrs. D’Souza”

She looked up from her papers and smiled.

“Morning Sean. Just a second, I’ll fetch your schedule- who is this lady?” she asked as she saw me standing beside Sean.

“I’m Kiara Jackson and I’m a new student” I told her.

“Jackson?Ah! You must be the daughter of the scientist who just came into the town” she appended.

I nodded with an awkward smile. She probed through the stash of papers and gave us our schedules. She also gave me a map and my locker number. We thanked her and headed out to the lockers. Sean snatched my schedule and scanned it.

“We have the same classes Kia, except for the last period, in which you have advanced physics and I have nothing. Never knew you’re so good at physics. That class has the best students in physics and both the juniors and the seniors are put together. Good luck with that.” he informed me. I felt intimidated by this piece of information. He understood that and patted my back in reassurance.

I arranged my books in the locker and got to my first class along with Sean which happened to be english. I met with the teacher, Mr.Turner.

“New student uh?” he enquired

“Yes sir”

“Oh! Where are you from?”

“Manhattan”

“New Yorker uh! Welcome to La Pine and go take your seat” he gestured towards the seats.

I nodded and went to the back where Sean was and sat on the empty chair beside him, adjacent to the window. The class soon began to fill. When all the seats were full, Mr. Turner made me to introduce myself. I felt really self-conscious when all the students turned to look at me. Though Sean was reassuring, I still felt panicky and stuttered through my introduction. After embarrassing myself in front of about 50 students, I couldn’t pay attention to what Mr.Turner was talking about. I was looking out through the window, taking in the beautiful and peaceful surroundings, when I saw someone familiar. He was strolling along the school grounds with headphones on. I gasped when I realized who he was. 

“The rude guy with a black Porsche” I muttered to myself.

He looked in my direction, as if he heard what I said. I was perplexed when our eyes met. His gaze was so magical that, I couldn’t bring myself to turn away.

Impressum

Tag der Veröffentlichung: 20.10.2015

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