March 1

Dear Diary,

I'm really nervous, I couldn't do anything but think about the call that I got from home today. I thought about various reasons they would call me for,
Gramps might be ill, Oh! no, I don't want to think about any possibility like that. May be some one is seriously ill or dead :,( God!!!!!! I don't want to think bad, Gramps said that if we think ill of something at evening it happens no matter what. May be it's a stupid belief we have here but still I believe everything she says.
I called home like 30 times a hour. None is answering me, The journey to home is long and I can't wait until then. I called my sis to know what happened. Fortunately, she picked up. Haha! What a weird thing she said she wasn't supposed to say anything. I tricked her by saying I would give her my pocket money but in vain.
There has to be something seriously wrong. I hope none is hurt. I hope everyone is safe. I prayed to god, please don't hurt my life, if you want you can give the punishment to me for whatever reason you are trying to give them.
fingers crossed :)


March 2

Dear diary,
How could this all happen to me? I never meant harm to others or for that sake never hurt anyone's feelings. Why is it happening to me? Gramps is right we should never think ill, god seems to have heard my prayer and he gave the worst punishment to me.
When I reached home, the whole place is chaotic, my relatives were all over the place. As soon as they saw me they pecked my cheeks, hugged, kissed, that felt weird. Mom, rushed to me and embraced me in deep hug. She cried happy tears.
I screamed as soon as I heard what the Chaos is about. Mom assured me into a room and closed the door behind so that none could hear my tantrums. Gramps tried to calm me down but I wouldn't listen even to her. Mom tried to reason with me but I was deaf eared to her.
I ran to my room and pouring out my hurt feelings to you.
I'm gonna kill him!!!!!! Sorry, i didn't tell you the whole thing. I'm getting married in a month to a complete stranger and day after tomorrow is my engagement. What the hell is with my life?????????
I WILL NOT MARRY HIM!!!!!!!!!!


March 3

Dear Diary,
I don't think I'll stand it anymore. They keep saying that I'm lucky, i wanted to scream to shut it off but my upbringing stopped me from doing such things.
My family is really happy about the match. Mom tried to say details about him but I brushed her off all the time. I could see her hurt in her eyes as I did that but I'm no mood to feel concerned about anyone. If anyone deserves pity, concern or crying shoulder it's me!!!!!!!!!!!!
Dad brought his pictures and Bio. Mom, is playing clever she knew that I can't brush him off like I did her. Dad showed me his pic, he is handsome but still I don't want to marry him.
Raj's Bio:
Name: Raj Malhotra
height: 6'1
Color : fair
profession: S/w engineer at LA
income:2lpm
Family: parents live in India and two elder sisters already married.
Sun sign: Scorpio

As if I care!!!!!!! Dad said that he saw me somewhere and put the proposal in front of my parents. My family thinks it's an ideal match. They are not even concerned about asking whether I like him or not. I'm going to get you Raj.
I WILL NOT MARRY HIM !!!!!!!!!!!!


March 4

Dear diary,
He was here today, he tried to charm me. Oh,no! I'm not going to fall for that. Raj, you are gonna die in my hands. I tried to be as simple dressed as possible to show him that i'm not interested in the marriage.
Seriously, I think he is nuts. He said I look simple and elegant. Wow! so much for my first move. Later he asked for my private audience, I denied but one glare from Mom sent me into my room. He tried to make conversation, I just nodded for everything. I didn't even what the fuss was all about.
How dare he touch me!!!!!! When he was leaving, he took my hands into his and said that he was happy that I accepted his proposal. As if I had a choice.
May be he is good, no how can he be? when he is forcing himself into my life?
I WILL NOT MARRY HIM!!!!!!


March 5

Dear diary,
I'm back from home. I excused myself saying that I need to attend an important work here. Dad agreed to it halfheartedly. I need to devise a plan to stop it anyway. I said to my friends about the whole thing, they readily agreed to help me out of this unwanted relationship.
Mom called me and said that I need to finish my work fast whatever it is and resign to the job since I'm going to LA with him. I smiled at myself since Mom is naive about my mission: stop marriage.
I thought about it the whole day and came up with a brilliant idea. The only thing I have to do is get his number and ask one of my friend to act the part.
I called home and got his number. Mom sounds happy, she thought I'm getting over the fuss. :) Good thing, if anything goes wrong tomorrow she will not doubt me.
MISSION: STOP MARRIAGE SET TO GO!!!!!!!!


March 6

Dear diary,
My first plan is flap show. I requested Rahul to make Call to Raj, he played well the part I gave him. I was sure that my mission was accomplished. I over joyed that this is going to be easy.
Everything ounce of happiness melted away as soon as I heard Raj scolding Rahul for making prank calls.
Rahul tried convincing him that what he said was true.
Instead of believing him, he certified that he is lucky to have such a genuine girl like me in his life.
WoW! what a turn of events but I'm not gonna give up, I'll think of another plan.
As if this wasn't enough Mom called and asked me if I called him. If I said yes, she would definitely ask if I like him, I couldn't lie about it. I said that I was too shy to call him. Oh, God! what a freaking liar, I am.

PLAN 1 FAILED, PLAN2!!!!!!!! HAVE TO THINK


March 7

Dear diary,
I'm gonna kill her, what's she doing. God!!!!!!! I'm going to kill myself in embarrassment. Do you know what happened.
After work I received call from him.My friends laughed hysterically when they heard our conversation.
Raj: hi, it's me Raj.
Pia: Hm!
Raj: Your Mom said you couldn't call so I thought may be I should call.
i tried to hush my friends but they wouldn't
Raj: how was the day?
Pia: boring,( same as you I thought)
Raj: I'm having a meeting tomorrow at your city. May be we can have a cup of coffee.
Pia: I'm busy tomorrow, sorry. :)
My roomies shouted Liar!!!!!!!!
Raj: May be the next day.
Pia:Listen, I gotta go. I have some work.
I clicked the end button without waiting for his answer.
Stupid people,stupid conversation. I don't know why I put it here. I just wanted to share everything with you since none hears me.
MISSION: PLAN2 STILL UNDER PROCESS


March 8

Dear diary,
I didn't lift his call, today. I was afraid he would ask me out again and I would have to lie again but my luck seems to run out these days.
My friends planned for a movie and out of all the places, I ran into him there. First, I tried to go unnoticed but he followed me and the worst part is he has the next chair to me in the theater. I caught him staring at me most of the times. He tried to make conversation but I hushed him and pretended that the movie was interesting.
I was so irritated to sit beside him and truth is I wished that the movie is soon over. As soon as the movie is finished he asked me over to a cup of coffee. I pointed to my friends, he nodded and said I could bring them to.
The worst part they tried to make fun of me so they said that they need to go and I'm absolutely free and willing to have coffee with him. He chatted with them for sometime and they left sneering at me. My temper was lost.
I tried to contain it so I zoned out his voice but as I said my luck ran out. He squeezed my hands to get attention that got me furious. I shrieked at him for pushing himself into my life and said bad words to him. He stood stunned.


March 9

Dear diary,
I shouldn't have done that. Anyway he deserves what he got.
I'm worried that he would call home and tell everything and I don't want my parents to get upset over me.
May be I should call him, apologize and beg him not tell anything at home. May be I should leave it and see what happens. I panicked whenever my phone rang hoping it wasn't from home.

I hope everything goes well ;,(


March 10

Dear dairy,
Mom called today, I was nervous to lift but I answered her. I thought of telling her before she even asks me but something told me not to tell unless I am asked.
It seems that he didn't call to complain about me. I sighed with relief. Mom said they would come to me, the next week for darshan as it is our custom to take the soon to be couple to the temple and perform pooja.
He didn't after all tell Mom about it.


March 11

Dear Diary,
I must be losing my head. I didn't know what came into me.
I typed him message today thanking him for not telling my parents about my outburst. As soon as I hit the send button, I realized what I was doing and I tried to cancel it but these damn cellphone wouldn't stop once we hit send. I cursed it. I panicked what should i do now. The only thing that i thought was to turn off the mobile and escape from the outcome of my silly doing.
I wish the message is lost somewhere in the network or I wish he changed his number or his display isn't working.


March 12

Dear diary,
I'm not thinking clearly this days for sure. I left my phone switched off and it turns out to be that my parents tried calling me. They are worried about me when I didn't answer them for a long time. They called my roomie but she was out somewhere else.
She scolded for acting like a fool and said I should call home. I did. Mom sounded frantic when she first spoke to me and Gramps scolded me for leaving the phone switched off. Dad said that I shouldn't do it again since it got them worried sick. I apologized them and promised I wouldn't do it again.
As soon as I spoke to them and hit end button. I got a message from Raj.
Your Mom was worried about you, she called me to ask if I could reach you. I was worried too.. I thought this has something to do with me. I'm sorry for ever trying to be in your life. I'll get you out of this mess, I promise.
Does he mean? he is going to stop the marriage. Wow! after all my plan worked out. Yipee!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


March 13

Dear diary,
I was happy after so many days. This marriage is going to stop. Raj promised he would and I trust him on this.
I would get back my serene days back.


March 14

Dear Diary,
I hate him. I trusted him, he didn't keep his promise. Early in the morning when the door bell rang I thought it was milkman. I was shocked to core when I saw my family along with Raj's family. He was standing back with his head down.
I thought of wringing his neck then and there. He said he would stop it. It's my mistake to trust him. I set them breakfast and hurried to get ready. All the time I was planning someway to escape it but came out with no idea.
When I'm packing stuff Mom came along and she said that I need to pack for a week. They thought we should visit near by places too. My heart cried like a small baby on hearing that.How will I endure this a week?


March 15

Dear dairy,
I remained smug all through the darshan and pooja. My family was really happy and Raj's parents owned me like one of their daughters. They were really good to me. His mother was really fun to have around, his father spoke on every topic that I was interested. I never even eyed Raj but I saw him looking at me a few times.
We booked cottages to stay there. If it wasn't for the whole reason of this trip I could have enjoyed the scenic beauty very much. When am I ever lucky?


March 16

Dear dairy,

I really am in eternal debt to Raj!!!!!!
We went hill climbing today. My parents sat in a small hotel and said that they couldn't walk anymore. I tried to sit with them because I didn't want to go with him. But Ria, my sis insisted on going with her. We reached the edge of water falls. There is a cave like opening and from the top of the cave the water flowed down. I thought of going there but Ria was afraid to come. Raj mumbled that it's slippery and I shouldn't go. I was so mad at him and I wanted to ake him mad too. I climbed up, he stared at me and followed me. I glared at him. The rock was really slippery and I tried to catch anything that I could see.
He pointed something over the huge noise that waterfall created. I turned to see what he was pointing. I slipped off at that instant and fell down. The water was so forceful that I was unable to breath. I heard Ria shouting for help when two strong arms pulled me out of the pool of water.
I could feel the pressure on my stomach, i spilled the whole gulped water. My throat hurt. I blinked open my eyes and saw Raj and Ria staring at me in confusion. Raj scooped me up and carried away.


March 17

Dear dairy,
My throat felt better today. I haven't had a chance to thank him yesterday for saving me.
I texted him thanks to which he instantly replied how i was feeling. I said lot better and thanked him again.
I sat in the lawn and my family went to nearby hotel for breakfast. I saw Raj coming towards our cottage.
I thanked him again for saving me. He smiled weakly and was trying to say something. He apologized me and I was so confused about what he was talking at first.
He said that he couldn't come out with a plan to stop the marriage but he will do it as soon as possible. For the first after this whole thing I completely forgot about my mission until he said that.
I thought he was really good after all and was sorry for being rude to him. I thought of making it up to him. I said may be we can be friends and he nodded.
We went to the near by museum and he was like moving library at that time. He spoke so much about history and the antiques there. It's amazing to see him fascinated about those things speaking with pure childish joy about his collections similar to ones there.
May be he wasn't bad at all. It's really fun having him around. He is funny and makes me laugh. He has a child like heart so genuine and pure.


March 18

Dear dairy,
We went to the nearby temple today and you know what something amazing happened. When we are coming back from the temple. A little boy was begging for money by catching everyone's leg. It's common for Indians to see kids like them a lot. All we do is we give them some money when I tried to give him money, Raj shouted at me to stop. I thought he is a miser, he earns so much but he can't spare a single rupee for this poor boy. I thought he was heartless but it turns out to be that I'm the one that is heart less.
He took the child to the nearby ashram and handed him to the head over there. He payed them huge amount to take care of that child and educate him as they do the others that are admitted in there. The little boy cried hugging him.
He is really really good :)


March 19

Dear dairy,
It's boring today. Raj went on some work to the city. I long to see him and have some time with him.


March 20

Dear dairy,
The whole journey we spent talking about everything and nothing. I dozed off into sleep being not able to sleep last night. When I woke up I was leaning onto his shoulders. I moved aside feeling awkward.
I shied away to speak because of the scene before. They dropped me at my room and went off. It's hard to see him going. May be he really became a good friend to me.


March 21

Dear dairy,
I texted him that I enjoyed the trip. He instantly called me back. We spoke about the trip for a long time into the night.
I'm really drowsy now, I can't write you everything we spoke but I can tell you enjoyed it and like to talk to him often.


March 22

Dear dairy,
I called him today as soon as i'm out of work. He was usually cheerful as himself. We spoke about our likes and dislikes, favorite movies,actors and as a matter of fact. His likes seems to be so similar to mine.
I like him and hey, don't think I'm going to marry him just because of it. I still don't want to marry him.
Nita asked me a curious question today, I laughed at her for thinking that I'm falling in love with him.
She looked at me as if she pitied me. Why was that?
I mean if I love him, I wouldn't want to stop the marriage. She might be seeing it in the wrong way.
Anyways gotta go, Raj is taking me to somewhere. He said it was a surprise. You know I love surprises hope this would be good.


March 23

Dear dairy,
The worst has happened, I thought everything is going back to normal.
Raj took me to his farmhouse today. He closed my eyes and walked me into some place. When he opened my eyes I couldn't believe what was in front of me. All the shades of colors are sprinkled over the place. It's a garden of flowers of different varieties and different colors. I ran in every direction not knowing where to go fast. It felt like every flower is inviting me with it's vibrant colors.
I was so overwhelmed, I saw Raj smiling and I ran to him,hugged him and thanked him for the most wonderful surprise of my life. Next thing I know was he was kissing me. I tried to comply with what's going on then something switched inside me suddenly and i pushed away from him and slapped him hard on the face.
I must be stupid, how could I let him do that. I'm so embarrassed about everything. I don't feel like writing anymore to you.


March 24

Dear dairy,
There's a message from Raj saying that he was really sorry for what he did. What ever I'm not going to text him back. He has taken too far this time.
I'm doing it right, aren't I?


March 25

Dear dairy,
I re winded the whole thing in my mind for the hundredth time. It's like not leaving my mind ever since that kiss.
You know what I think it's my fault after all. I shouldn't have hugged him in the first place. I shouldn't have slapped him. I was always being rude when he was only being nice to me all the time. I wish I could say sorry and get back things normally. I miss his voice and funny chattering we have.
Should I text him? May be not. I have to think it thoroughly before making a call.


March 26

Dear dairy,
Mission accomplished. My marriage was called off.
Mom cried over the phone saying that someone called father and said that Raj isn't a good guy and one of our relatives conformed it. Mom said that I must be feeling awful about the marriage. but I wasn't.
I tried to soothe her. I felt oddly sad may be because I don't like to see Mom worried.


March 27

Dear dairy,
I texted Raj for calling off the marriage. He answered back I'm glad that it worked now you are free of me.
I'm not gonna lie today to you dairy. I really am sad, I wish that it wasn't Raj's doing, I wish he still wants me. I wish everything was back to normal.Now that everything is over between us may be he wouldn't talk to me again.I cried when I knew I won't be talking to him anymore.
I'll miss him :,(


March 28

Dear dairy,
Nita was right, I love him. How couldn't I see that before? If I have this all couldn't have happened.
When Nita asked me why I was crying when everything went perfectly well as I had planned. I had no answer for it but she has she gave the same look that she gave me previously that's when I everything came into place. I called him and arranged to meet him tomorrow. He was slightly shocked when i said I have to meet him.


March 29

Dear dairy,
I'm so happy, I have the whole life with him together. I am mad with joy.
I met him as fixed and said to him about my love. First he seemed to be shocked then his whole face lit up. We entwined our fingers holding that precious seconds forever.
We spoke for hours about how to deal with the situation. I was responsible for the whole mess so I'll sort it out. I'm determined to have him in my life. I called dad explained everything. First, he didn't believe but after some serious explanation he did. He said me to start off as soon as possible.


March 30

Dear dairy,
You won't believe it. I'm officially, Mrs.Raj Malhotra now. Things seems to be turning out to be great.
Our wedding went as they planned for us before. I had my friends invited and everything was super cool. Most important of all, I have Raj beside me and my marriage was love and arranged as I always planned it to be. hahaha!!!!!!!!!

Impressum

Tag der Veröffentlichung: 02.04.2011

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Widmung:
dedicated to parents and children. cover art, is from some amazing artist which I found online, thanks to him.