Cover


CHAPTER 1

“Please give a big round of applause for the graduating class of 2011!” our principal yells in an I-feel-so-accomplished attitude.

As the whole senior class throws their mortarboards (graduating hats) in the air, screams fill the auditorium like a movie theatre with incredible sound systems.

Everyone starts scrambling to go run to their mother and father like little kids, to show off their diploma. I ran as fast as I could actually; so probably the biggest baby out of everyone…

“Mom! Dad! I did it! I graduated high school, and I am so ready for college!” I said, so conceited.

“That is great honey, we are so blessed and happy for all your achievements and many more to come.” My mom says getting ready for her annual speeches again.

“I knew you could do it kiddo! Never doubted ya’.” Says my dad, while he pats me on the back to show he was manly, but knowing he wanted to cry of joy.

“Hold on guys, I will be right back. I just want to go congratulate Nathan.”

“Ok, hurry back!” said my parents in harmony.


Nathan Wilmore was my absolute, positively, extreme, best friend in the whole wide world. We knew each other since sixth grade when we had the same homeroom class. I don’t know why, but I have always trusted guy friends more than girl friends. Girls promise they would not tell anyone whom you like, but then the whole school knows, and she eventually tries to steal him away from you. But guys are totally different. They won’t tell their guy friends who you like they actually do not care at all.

“OMG NATHAN! WE DID IT BRO!” I said ignoring all the other people around us.

“YEAH WE DID!” He said, with as much enthusiasm as I.
I ran to him and gave him a friendly hug and then I felt myself being lifted off the ground and twirled around like a little child. That is what he does when he is extremely happy. I guess he was extremely happy…
He put me down and I punched him in the arm, and he faked pain.

“So we have to hang out before summer ends. I can’t believe your going to UC. You won’t feel the seasons of fall, winter and spring. Just summer all year round.”

“California is not always hot, it gets pretty chilly sometimes. So, why are you going to NYU?!” I say in a comeback.

“You know I’ve always wanted to become a director.”

“You are a dumb ass, why would you want to be a director.” I say nonchalantly.

“Because then I can make shows and movies that you will love. And I am not a dumb ass, I might be an ass, but not a dumb one.” He said pretending to be upset.

“Whatever.” I say laughing in between the word

“ Okay I have to go but call me later.” He says meeting up with his parents.

I remember about my parents and hurry back.


* * * *


CHAPTER 2

After the graduation I go out to my favorite restaurant; Olive Garden, with my parents. We each made a toast with our drinks. Mom has white wine, Dad has red wine, and I have punch spiked with a little wine from my mom that she offered. Even though I was going to college, I was still too young to drink!
After a wonderful salad and tons of garlic breadsticks digesting in my stomach, we are finally home. I run upstairs to my bedroom, like a jungle monkey. My room is painted lily purple, with purple fuzzy carpeting, and maximum numbers of posters of Taylor Lautner. Come on…he’s HOT! I took off my floral dress and four inch high-heel shows. Leaving only my underclothes to take off and take a nice hot shower.

When I get out the shower wrapped in my towel, my phone starts ringing. I run to see who it is.

Nathan.

When I press the green phone picture to answer, his deep, muscular tone says hey.

“Hey, what’s up?”

“Noting just wanted to ask you if you wanted to go to the movies with me and my new buddy tomorrow?” He said buddy nervously.

“Sure…awesome! What time?” I said a little puzzled.

“Umm…how about seven in the evening. It’s more fun to go out in the night.”

“Okay, see you there!” I said still puzzled, but happy at the same time.

* * * *

As I finished dressing in my baby blue with white polka dot shorts and matching baby blue strapless pajama shirt, I just lay in bed thinking. Since when has Nathan had a buddy other than me? I was his buddy!? I wasn’t jealous or anything, just surprised. Nathan never had another friend, just close acquaintances I guess.

I let it not bother me, rolled over on my side, and went to sleep.


* * * *

CHAPTER 3


The next day I spend the time until the movies doing absolutely nothing. I just wanted to go out and have fun with the most awesome person I knew, and his ‘buddy’. I think that’s when I started going crazy. I paced back and forth, turned the television on and then turned the television off. I even went upstairs and tried on different outfits that I could wear in case this ‘buddy’ of Nathan’s was cute.

It is six-forty and I am waiting for Nathan to pick me up with his ‘buddy’. I would of drove myself to the movies with my car, but Nathan insisted. I decided to go with a flirty look, but not a desperate look. So I wore my rose red and white floral- strapless shirt, my dark skinny jeans, and some black flats. My hair was in a side-curled ponytail, with my side swept bang. I also added a sweet and light makeup to my face; dark black mascara, a light-brownish eye shadow, and glossy red lip gloss.

Finally at six-fifty-five, I heard the doorbell ring. When I opened the door I saw a six-foot-four, wavy brunette hair, a rusty, sexy, unshaved face, and a shirt that hugged so tightly I saw a six pack. I couldn’t believe who I was looking at so I had to take a double take once again. When I realized it was Nathan my mouth opened so wide about a hundred bees could fly in there to make their honey. Nathan! My Nathan! He was hot, smoking hot! I guess that’s what happens when you get out of school you feel free and can wear whatever you want. But, I have never seen him like this before.

Nathan laughed at my reaction. “Hi, to you too.”

I knocked myself out of my daze. “Umm…hey. You look great!”

“Don’t be all lovey-dovey now let’s get to the car. I don’t want to miss the movie.”

I walked slowly still trying to regain my eyesight back. Wow was all I could think.

* * * *


I had finally made my way to the car and into the backseat because Nathan’s ‘buddy’ took the passenger seat. When I closed the door behind me, a guy in the passenger seat turns behind and looks at me.

“Hi I’m Brenton Roberts.” He said with his hand out waiting for me to shake it.

“Hello I’m Victoria Smith” I said with a grudge trying to smile, and grasp his hand to shake.

* * * *


CHAPTER 4

I’m sitting in the middle of Nathan and Brenton since it was a scary movie. Plus I couldn’t stand Brenton getting all the attention when he just ruined everything by coming into Nathan and I lives.

The movie was actually pretty scary and I flinched every moment they made those random effects to make you think something was going to jump out of a closet or something, but nothing really happens. Brenton thought it was the funniest thing he saw every time I jumped. But, Nathan saw how scared I got and pulled me under his arms. I felt protected, warm, and tingly? Why did I feel tingly?

After the movie I yelled at Brenton that I was really scared and he shouldn’t have laughed at me. I got my flirty outfit for nothing. Brenton was about six-feet, with dirty-blonde shoulder length hair, freckled face, dark blue eyes, and super squishy. Big time U- G- L- Y.

When Nathan dropped me off at my doorstep I couldn’t stop staring into his hazel brown eyes.

“Thanks for tonight, I had a lot of fun.” I said dreamily.

“Your welcome, anytime.” He said a little confused with my tone.

“Well I have to go. See you soon.” He said punching me lightly on the arm and headed back to his car.

I whispered bye, he didn’t hear.

That was it. I was totally crushing on Nathan Sam Wilmore.

* * * *


CHAPTER 5

I walked into my home to see mom and dad making out on the couch. As soon as I closed the door they saw me and quickly moved away from each other.

“EWWWWWW! GET A ROOM! YOU GUYS ARE LIKE IN YOUR MID-FORTIES! THAT IS JUST NAUSEATING!” I yelled. I couldn’t help it. It’s just gross to walk in on your parents making out. They were too old for that. Isn’t like mid-thirties the end of freaking around with people. Once you are past like thirty-five it’s just gross, unless you’re not married yet or single.

They looked at walking to my room quickly feeling embarrassed about the whole scene.

* * * *


I lied in bed thinking of things I could do to see if Nathan liked me back or even make him like me. I was eighteen going on nineteen, I think I could stretch the limit for my outfits I wear now. I fell asleep dreaming about Nathan and I lying on grass staring into each other’s eyes, and embracing each other in the sunset. I never thought this day would come or even thought I would think about this. But this day did come, and I am thinking about it.

* * * *


I woke up smiling from ear to ear, and heard a knock on my door.

“Honey, you up? I made breakfast downstairs so hurry up before it gets cold.” My mom said quickly, but sweetly. Probably still embarrassed by last night’s rude awakening that should of still be rudely sleeping.

“Okay I’ll be down.” I said getting out off bed.

When I went into the kitchen it was plates and plates of my favorite dishes. Pancakes, bacon, scrambled eggs, tea, orange juice, and a big bowl of fruit salad surrounded the kitchen table.

“We just wanted to apologize about last night. This is how we wanted to apologize, by giving you your favorite breakfast dishes.” My mom said in a pleading manner.

“Yeah I don’t think we should have done that when you were gone. I think we took advantage of the fact you were not in the house. I guess we can do that when you go off to college.” My dad said in slight giggle towards his last sentence.

“It’s cool. It just freaked me out that you guys still do that stuff. But lets forget about that and eat this food!” I said hesitantly.

* * * *


As we all raced to get the last bacon on the plate my dad mentioned college to me. I got the bacon though. Suckers!

“So when are you going to California to move your things into your dorm?” My dad asked concerned.

“Well, school doesn’t start in another month and a half, but I wanted to go in two weeks to get organized and meet new people so I can be prepared and feel like I fit in.” I said sad he even asked thinking about Nathan.

“Oh okay. Just let me know so I’ll be of assistance.”

* * * *

CHAPTER 6

I called Nathan to see if he wanted to come over and hang out since my parents went out to some Opera show. He said no he couldn’t him and Brenton are going to his house and play video games and stuff. WHAT!? I couldn’t believe he told me he was hanging out with Brenton when we only had two more weeks left to hang out.

For about a week now I feel like my supposedly best friend in the whole wide world has ignored me. I text him so we can hang out, he says he is busy, or hanging out with Brenton. When I call he either doesn’t pick up or answers and quickly rushes me off the phone. I collapse sometimes feeling that I would never get to admit my feelings for him.

All of a sudden I felt like I had to call him. That he was going to answer his and he would be able to hang out with me today. No Brenton. No ‘I’m busy’ crap. So with my head held high I called his number and the phone ringed…

“Hello?” he said

“Hey Nathan, remember me? Victoria. The girl you have been ditching a lot.” I said extremely upset.

“Oh sorry about that just had a lot to do. You know for college.” He said guilty
“Yeah, you forgot hanging out with Brenton so much you forgot about me!” I said feeling heated up from head to toe about to burst out in flames.

“Okay chill out would you. I’ll come over right now. Is your parents home?”

“No they’re both at work.” I said calming down from the wrath that was unleashing.

“Ok I’ll be over there in a few.” He said hanging up without allowing me to say goodbye.

* * * *


The doorbell rang and I quickly ran into the bathroom to make sure I was flirty, and sexy enough for Nathan. I had on a low cut white shirt to show some cleavage and my mid-thigh denim shorts. I fixed my boobs and glossed my lips and walked towards the door.

When I opened the door I saw Nathan looking as hot as he did the night we all went to the movies, maybe even hotter. He looked at me up and down, kind of examining me and then just looked right back at my face.

“Hey, come in.” I said softly

“I’m sorry I’ve been ignoring you. I really am. What do you want to do?”

“Well I was thinking a movie. Want to watch all the Karate Kid movies?” I said joyfully

We love Karate Kid. It was our best friend movie anthem. We knew like every word in every scene.

He giggled. “Yeah.”

We headed to the couch and he offered to put the movie in. What a gentlemen, no wonder I like him so much.

The movie was so long and all I thought about was when was I going to make my move. He was so interested in the movie like it was his first time watching it. He never looked at me, and I never looked at him. I never made a move, he never made a move. But, I had to. So I turned to him waiting for him to notice me at the corner of his eyes. When he turned I smiled and looked into his hazel eyes. Then he stared into my greyish eyes and smiled. Then when he smiled I knew that was my cue to make my move. I wrapped my arms around his neck to draw him closer to me and quickly kissed him softly, then it became a little harder grasping into a French kiss. Then he did the worst thing I could have imagined… he pulled away.


“WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING!” he yells madly at me.

I was so confused. He was kissing me back.

“I was kissing you Nathan.” I said so scared of what was going on.

“I know you were damn kissing me, but why?”

“Well I like you a lot, and we knew each other for awhile. When you turned back and looked at me I just had to kiss you, it was like your lips were a magnet, and mine were metal. I’m sorry.” I said with my head hang low.

“Don’t do that crap again. I didn’t feel any tingle, or physical bond when you kissed me just to let you know.” He said heartless.

I was shocked he felt nothing when I felt so much I wanted to take it all the way.

“Not even a little?” I asked calmly.

He paused. “No. Not even a little.”

We both paused for a couple of seconds.

“Victoria, I’m gay.” He says blurting all the words out.

I paused and just stared at him.

“What!? How!?” Crap. Damn. Shit. Was all I could think. Swearing in my mind was not helping, but what was I supposed to do.

“I never had a girlfriend in high school because I didn’t feel attracted to them much, and I never had kissed one in a while. So I decided to switch my interest to males. And… Brenton’s my boyfriend. “

So that is why he was hanging out so much with Brenton. Wow…

“I’m so-“ But he was gone already leaving me puzzled, embarrassed, and heart broken.

I ran upstairs to my room and cried myself to sleep and eventually woke up crying out of bed. This went on for days…


CHAPTER 7

I love him.

I really and truly loved him. He was my best friend, gay, but I love him.

My mom always came to room occasionally to cheer me up, and tell me everything will be fine when I go off to college and make new friends. But, I didn’t want friends. I wanted Nathan.

He called so often, I never answered.
He texted all the time so we can meet up and talk, I never replied.

I felt like I was jabbed that day with a knife and I’m going through my healing process now. I was so determined to admit my feelings to him that when I did it ruined everything. I was over trying to tell him sorry or talk to him because I didn’t want to show him how hurt I was. Love sucks.

* * * *


I heard the doorbell and didn’t want to come out of bed still in my crying depression mood, so I waited for my mom or dad to get it. My mom came upstairs and said it was Nathan and thinks it is time for me to talk to him now. She told me her and dad were going to go for groceries and leave me here to talk to Nathan. Nooooooo I wanted to yell, but I knew she was right.

In came Nathan, walking slowly into my room closing the door behind him. When he saw me crying he ran next to me and sat on the bed.

“Please don’t cry. Don’t cry because of me. I am a dumb ass.” He said pleadingly.

“No you’re not. You are just an ass, but not a dumb one.” I said smirking.

“Are you really gay?” I said.

“Do you really like me?” he said in return.

At the same time we said no.

“I’m not gay anymore. That kiss changed everything. When I said I didn’t feel any tingle or spark I lied because I was scared to maybe try and be straight again and turn our relationship to something else. That kiss made me automatically love you.” He said so lightly.

“You love me? I can’t believe I’m saying this, but I love you too.” I said smiling so cheesy but sweetly at the same time.

“I broke up with Brenton, he was an asshole anyway.” He said then grabbed me and kissed me softly until I kissed back and it grew stronger. The French kiss we almost started that day, restarted right then. I grabbed him onto me and he asked if I was sure I wanted to do this.

“We’re going to college. We’re adults now, right?”
“Right.” He said in agreement.

It was the first time I was having sex and I felt absolutely happy that it was with someone I loved and cared about so deeply.

He kissed my face and neck traveling down my body taking off all clothing in his path. I followed taking off his shirt, then his pants and then underwear. Soon we were connected as one. Feeling the sensation that love creates. Breathing every minute we had a chance. When he stopped I wanted to go, and when I stopped he wanted to go. It felt so right, that we kissed forever. When he kissed my neck I closed my eyes and felt like he had just cast a spell on me to fall into a deep sleep. When we kissed our lips paired so perfectly. I parted mine and we connected our lip’s movements as the guide. I moaned, he groaned. His hands all over my body, mine all over his. It was perfect. We didn’t know what was next, as long as we both loved each other…nothing matters.

Impressum

Tag der Veröffentlichung: 04.09.2011

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