SWEET DREAMS

There she stood. Lonely, freezing and with too thin clothes. Why did she have to talk to her parents about her relationship to Sheetu?
‘They’ll understand, Bella. Believe me!’ he said. And now she was homeless, with nothing than the clothes she was wearing and three dollars in her pocket.
Sheetu has been wrong. She loved him with her whole body and soul. Everytime she needed him he was there. He held her in his arms when she was sad and laughed with her, sometimes for hours.
But now he wasn’t here. She was alone.
He pushed her to talk to her parents. But she already knew how her parents would react.


Two years ago a Pakistani boy killed himself with a bomb and he took ten others with him. Under the dead people were mainly just Pakistanis. There were just two English schoolboys. Her brother’s friend and her brother himself.
After that her mother hated every single Pakistani. Even when they had nothing to do with Pakistan and had English mothers. Her father said once that he would kill his daughter, her, if she would ever have a relationship with a Paki.
And now she was grateful that he didn’t this evening and just kicked her out.
For herself she did not think like her parents. She was sad about her brother’s death, but still she could not hate every Pakistani person on earth. It was not her way of thinking.
Freezing she rubbed her numb hands together and stepped from one feet to the other one, thinking about the first time she met Sheetu.


It was one year after her brother’s unnatural death. She stood at the waterlane bridge, waiting for the bus to take her to school and was watching the leaves on the water flowing.
It was the middle of autumn and the leaves where coloured in the most prettiest colours. Suddenly somebody touched her neck. She squeaked frightened and turned around to see who touched her.
Brown hazelnut coloured eyes looked into hers and she feld like they were looking right into her soul and much deeper.
‘Sorry, but you were covered in leaves’, a dark voice said and she realized that the one who touched her was a boy, and not just a ‘boy’. He looked amazingly beautiful and probably could be a model for an Italian fashion company even when he had
leaves in one hand.
He had silky, curly, long, black hair which he wore in a loose tail. Wisps got out of the tail and caressed his face.
His teeth were white and his lips like they must have been owned before by a god.
After a while she realized that she was staring at him and looked down on her feet.
‘Thanks’ she murmured.
‘No problem.’
It sounded like he was hardly trying not to laugh.
She looked up again and caught a friendy smile on his face.
‘By the way, my name is Sheetu.’
He said this so naturally, like they would have known each other for more than just two minutes that she just told him her name too.
‘Bella.’
‘You’re looking like your name’ he smiled. ‘Nice to meet you Bella.’
She blushed.
‘Nice to meet you too.’


That was the first time they met. They talked in the bus, after they got out of it, after school and soon it was for both impossible to be separated.
Then two months later they kissed the first time. She still remembered how it tasted.
Like strawberries on a hot summerday.
Sheetu was the perfect gentlemen. He took her to the cinema, went with her shopping (just buying a new pant or something like that), cooked for her and showed her were he lived. He had an own appartment close to the waterlane bridge and it
was ancient furnished.
Not that he was rich, but his parents send him enough money every month to live and they had bought him the appartment and the furniture too.
So they had no problem to meet.
Sheetu often asked her to become aquainted with her parents. He could not believe that people could think in a way of dislike about somebody they never met before.
But her parents could. That’s why she didn’t even told him were she exactly lived.
If they couldn’t she would not stand now in front of her home in the darkness, freezing.
Then she heard somebody call her name.
‘Bella!’
He found her. Even though he did not know were she was he found her. He sprinted towards her and took her into his strong arms.
‘Your lips are blue, Bella! What happened? Bella?’
She couldn’t answer. Tears were running down her cheeks. He took her on his arms and she twined her arms round his neck.
Take me home’ she wispered.
And he did.



OUTLIFE EXPIRIENCE

You know when you lose the ground under your feet and the world spins you see your life in just one second running through your mind.
All the dreams you had, the people you loved, the places you’ve been living they all appear and vanish in the dark.


I was born in a hospital in Cherryville, Oregon. My mother, my father and I lived in a typical American house, in a typical street. Just the normal family next door you can meet everywhere in America. I had a happy childhood a lot of friends and loving parents. But I never felt like I belong to that place. I’ve always been so quiet. Always watching things.
Later in High School I’ve been interested in sports and nothing else but my grades were fine.
Once at a sports festival I won the one mile run. It was a fantastic feeling. Like drugs, but much better.
I got a stipendium at a sport- college and finished college with best grades. But I were not a nerd. I never learned for tests, just listened and watched everything very close.
Because I loved sport I became a teacher for High School.
I wanted to give children the chance to find themselves in sport, not in drugs and cigarettes. But I never saw somebody like me in five years.
After these five years I quit my job and went to Europe on a trip.
But still there was something I wanted to do. I didn’t know what, but something was in my mind.

After months of traveling around I came to Britain. My native language made me feel good again and I took a apartment and searched myself a job.
But after a few years my parents both died in a car-crash and I had to go back to America.
At their graves I felt like walking on clouds.
I were thirty that time.
It was after I came back to America when I met him.
He was in a hurry and ran right into be. A rain out of paper and pencils covered us and we laughed. It was just so ridiculous!
We went out and grew together.

It was that special evening when he took me out to an expensive restaurant. He asked me to marry him and I said yes. Of corse I wanted.
He was my everything!
We got out of the restaurant, me feeling out of it, him kind of dancing and singing around me.
It was just a reflex. I saw the car coming straight in our direction, and the reflection behind the window.
Short before the glass of the window shivered on the street and the bullet flew in our direction I threw myself in front of him.
It was the most horrible feeling I ever had. Fire. Like fire…


You know when you lose the ground under your feet and the world spins you see your life in just one second running through your mind.
All the dreams you had, the people you loved, the places you’ve been living they all appear and vanish in the dark.
But I just saw him, asking me to marry him, the most beautiful moment in my life.
I’ve just been searching for someone to love.
And I closed my eyes with a smile on my lips.


Falls ihr 'A streetcar named Disire' kennt könnt ihr damit auch etwas anfangen :)

Also das hier ist ein Brief von Stella an Blanche (die in der Klinik ist).

Blanche, Honey!

They’ve taken you to the hospital just two days ago.
I’m so extremly sorry hon.
I know that the thing that has broken your mind was, or better still is, terrible.
But at this time I were totally blind.
I’ve loved this man so badly that I couldn’t belief you.


You know hon. When you tried to open my eyes I were not able to see.
For a long, long time Stanley has been my sunlight, my only star at the blck sky.
When you came I were happy to see you, to talk to you!
But he allready disliked you.
I could see how he tried to built a thick wall to separate us from each other. He allways was digging in
your past to find things that would make me hate you.


But he didn’t know you in the past.
Do you remember hon. what you said once when we were sitting under a cherrytree in the backyard?
You said: “You are my sister, my little star Stella. And I will never ever let you down!”
I took it as a promise that time.
A promise of safety that we gave us.
But I, Blanche, I let you down! That he could actually do this to you was my fault.
Because I didn’t see his real face.
Thank you a lot for showing me that and giving me the chance to find a real man, not a monster.


Maybe you did not realize that my daughter was born on your day of doom.
She is the most cutest thing on earth, so adorable ans sweet.
And I thank god that I can’t find anything on her that reminds me on her father.
But what actually makes me very happy is that she is looking like you Blanche when you were a Baby.
You need to know that I’m always thinking of you.
When you recover I will come and get you. You can live together with Mary (may cute girl) and me in our new place.


I hope they’ll allow me soon to visit you.


Lots of love from both of us.


Your Stella


LESTER BURNHAM FROM THE MOVIE 'AMERICAN BEAUTY' ABOUT AMERICA

America is a promised land.
A land of dreams.
Work hard. Show self-discipline.
Make every possible use of our abilities.
Have material success.
Enjoy wealth and prosperity.

Oh holy crap I just read this bullshit in the internet. After laughting for almost ten minutes I’m now in the motion to be angry about this crap.

‘America is a promised land.’

Ha ha. For who? I mean if you believe in the old man with the long, white beard who is sitting on clouds and just has to klick with his fingers and it rains must be really insane.

‘A land of dreams.’

O sweet lullaby bring little child a dream! Of corse you have dreams, I have some which are only for adults but this country isn’t the land of dreams.

‘Work hard. Show self-discipline.’

Man, I’m always working hard if I’m not working at work I work at home! Probably I’m the hardest worker in the USA!
And the best example for self-discipline is Carolyn. If something goes wrong in her little perfect life she gets out of it and is so depresst like our house caught fire and left anything. See? Self-discipline, ha!

‘Make every possible use of our abilities.’

Right you should really do this (not!). My best abilities are: drinking beer while sitting in my favorit chair, trying to seem busy at work and ignoring Carolyn. I should really think about using this, shouldn’t I?

‘Have material success.’

Alright, listen Americans of the world! You have to have a house, a garden, a child and for being perfect the best furniture and a dog. And all the others who don’t have this have to leave this continent! Wow isn’t it hilarious?

‘Enjoy wealth and prosperity.’

That is the only good one isn’t it? I will now every evening sit in my house, smoking, drinking, of corse the best stuff and enjoy my wealth and prosperity . I wonder what Carolyn will say….? Oh man, who cares. And what do we get out of this rubbish? America is a sick and cruel land, with weird people and weird wishes.
America sucks!

Realization of happiness

I actually haven’t really paid that much attention to other people and if they have been happy because of my own doing.
But this reminds me on the beggars that you can see around the city.
They are always there. But most of the time you don’t see them. They’re kind of invisible.
And I often though about passing by those people: are they just pretending?
But then I met one of them in the city. He was young, dirty, with bad teeth and shaking because of the coldness.
I mean what would you do?
Usually I’m just trying not to see them because they make me feel lonely and mean.
But this man was like nobody else… I can’t really explain it…
When I gave him a coin, probably 50 Cent he smiled at me. And I really think that he was happy at this moment.
I think it doesn’t have to be a big thing that you can do or give to other people to be happy, and sometimes we don’t even realize that we make people happy.
But when we realize, it makes us feel happy too.
Just a short moment of happiness, but sometimes that’s all we’ve got…


Creative text (Beispiel Abi-Klausur Aufgabe)

(…) He didn’t smile at all, just tried to look happy. As he saw a confused look on his father’s face he stopped holding up his ‘happy-face’.
All the people around him were so happy, smiling, laughting and eating like their were going to get married themselfes. He wished for himself it would be their wedding and closed his eyes for a while. But as he opend his eyes again he stillwas at the same place, in the same situation and still scared of what wa coming.
What if he would see the same disdain in her eyes like last time she looked at him?
What if she was going to hate him?
He was going to spend the rest of his life with this woman. He didn’t even know what she liked to eat.
He could marry a stone an would know more about it than about Sheetal.
He felt like he has been sitting there for hours, caught in his thoughts, as the ceremony started.
He felt the air like knives in his lungs.
A picture on the wall caught is look and during the whole ceremony he just kept looking at the picture. On it were people in pretty clothes laughting and dancing.
But in the front there was a dog.
Little, white and lonely.
Far away from the dancing and laughing people, looking at them.
As somebody touched his shoulder he stood up.
With fear he recognized that his knees were shaking and he was grateful to be dressed in the long ceremony clothes wich covered his legs.
After the wedding, which he totally faded out, they were led to the weddingnight room door. (…)

Impressum

Tag der Veröffentlichung: 30.10.2009

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