Prologue

“We were just heading to the coffee shop around the corner. I insisted we go because we were both exhausted we needed some source of energy. We got to the corner across the street from the shop. I turned around to press the crosswalk button and that’s when I heard it… it was horrible; the sound of rubber skidding over concrete. I tried to get to her but when I turned around it was already too late. Around me there was chaos, I could tell there was… but… I couldn’t hear it. It was all happening in slow motion and there was only one thing that I could focus on… her. I had to get to her. I pierced the crowd that surrounded her like buzzards, but as soon as I seen her I wish I hadn’t. Her lifeless body lay mangled there on the ground I couldn’t… I just couldn’t. I couldn’t look at her but I had to hold her, tell her it would be ok but I knew those words would have been lies. She was probably already gone, but I just couldn’t accept it. As I sat on the concrete with her body in my arms I cried… I had never truly cried until that moment. I screamed for someone... anyone to help call 911, and by the sound of the approaching sirens an ambulance was already on its way. My chest was getting tighter and tighter, and I couldn’t breathe. Then I blacked out. The next thing I remember is waking up in the hospital”

“What happened then?”

“They told me that they had pronounced her dead at the scene and it was already too late when they got there.”

“And that’s all you remember about your last day with Vivian.”

“…Yes”

“You hesitated why?”

“It’s time to end today’s session right?”

“Oh, gosh, your right! I’ll be seeing you tomorrow then correct?”

“Yeah, I guess”

“Don’t go getting yourself into trouble Declan”

I quickly gathered my stuff and headed out of that hell hole as fast as I could. Why does my family put me through this torture? I thought it was supposed to help me get over my past, not recreate every detail. I jerked the door open with a little more force than I intended, causing it to nearly knock the vase on the stand behind it onto the oddly colored tiles of the floor. They were nearly a rust color with swirls of green on them that were the same color of the curtains. They say they are supposed to soothe the mind of patients during sessions. I know for a fact that’s a load of shit. It’s kind of hard to be relaxed and calm when you’re talking about the tragedy that is your past.

As I step into the bright light of the waiting room I see that girl again. Every time that I have session she’s here. I’ve created a game where I try and figure out why everyone is in therapy, but her story is the one that I can’t figure out. No scars, she doesn’t look crazy, she doesn’t even look depressed, but then again my mother always told me you can never judge a book by the cover. She doesn’t look much like a person who struggles in life either. Though I want to find out more about her we do not ever speak. Maybe she’s mute. That’s stupid, why would she be in therapy if she can’t talk to her therapist. I should really stop talking to myself; it makes me seem like a crazy person. I mean, I kind of am but I still shouldn’t talk to myself.

She’s beautiful but that’s another reason I can’t talk to her, I’d get attached, just another person I can lose. Every time I see her I find a quality that I didn’t spot before. So far all that I’ve gathered is she has long brown hair that shines even when there is no light. These eyes that make you feel like she can see your very soul, the lively green in them the same color as the leaves of the most beautiful catalpa tree, but the brown specks in them suggest there is a mystery that lies behind them. Her nose narrow and straight and her lips full with a deep scarlet color. Her face begins round but ends at the point of her chin. I wish I could know her, but it’s too hard.

Impressum

Tag der Veröffentlichung: 08.04.2013

Alle Rechte vorbehalten