Introduction

I meet a lot of people who cannot get their stuff together, can’t get their butterflies to fly in formation. That’s no surprise because they grew up in a crazy world and just cannot make sense of it. Can’t make sense of religion. Can’t make sense of the economic system. Chances are they can’t make sense of their relationships either. It’s hard to get a sense of direction when you live in a house of mirrors, when everything is distorted, when your mind jumps from one text message to another.

Don’t worry someone is figuring how to deal with your stuff even while you remain in confusion. Right now someone is planning to run an ad on TV that tells you that you can buy a car from them with only $99 down and since your stuff is still in disarray they won't bother to tell you how much interest you will be charged.

But if you feel that it might be good to start connecting the dots in life, to do it in such a way that you finally get the big picture and that you might to even want to color in the picture so as to give it definition texture and bring it to life then this book is designed to help. It’s written for a fast read; I know that your mind is quick, maybe too quick but in the final chapter we will show you how to slow down to the speed of thought, the speed of your own thought and give you suggestions on how to uncrazy the world.

Living on the edge of information

Don’t be surprised if you often feel confused, frustrated, irritated and downright mad about your life and the life others live around you. You have just come through and or still going through the most dynamic change the world has ever gone through.

                                  Change makes amateurs out of us all.

When older people come into my office, I often hear them say; We are living in a different world.

Young people come by and very often think that they have the tiger by the tail forgetting that’s it’s the mouth of the tiger that they should be worried about.

All of us grew up with a set of assumptions and many of them wrong. When I was in the printing business a fellow came in and wanted a new set of business cards printed, it had been several years since he had updated them. Our city had just gone through a 911 revamping of all the street numbers. So I asked this fellow are you sure your house number is the same? “Well I’ve lived there thirty years, I guess I know my own house number.” Two weeks later he came back in, finally aware that his number had been changed and expected me to reprint them at my expense.

My favorite brother in law was having a twentieth wedding anniversary and I wanted to do something nice for him. He had a nice work shop about 60 yards from his house but had to run inside each time he received a phone call. [ no cell phones then ] so I bought some phone wire, strung it out to the workshop and hooked up an extension.

I assured him it was legal and that Ma Bell had no say in the new hook up. When I went back to visit in six months he had taken it down and said that he was afraid that he would get in trouble. His hunting buddies were not aware of the changes in the law and warned him that he would get in trouble if the phone man saw the line running to the shop. So much for progress!

Living in this age, things change so fast that it leaves most of us feeling like amateurs. Especially when it comes to workplace rules. That is just one reason why we need a union to keep track of all the work rules and see to it that we are treated justly and fairly.

The apostle Paul once wrote that he saw through a glass darkly and that he did not comprehend all things. Dah! So Paul you should live now in this high speed complicated world where our eyesight and our comprehension is challenged on an hourly basis. The fact that we walk around not seeing not understanding is not mysterious what is mysterious is that so many believe that they see everything clearly. So unless you know how much is yet to be learned then this book nor any book is likely to be of any help to you.

Consider Meditation

Part of getting your stuff together is to get confusion out of your mind. That might seem like something simple to do but some people have had clutter in their minds so long that it seems natural to them. A first step and also low in cost is to find time and a place to meditate. Without a computer and without a hand held device and with only a pencil and a notepad ask yourself; what’s in my mind that should be sent to the trash bin? It’s time to unload stuff that’s been holding you back. The answer may not come to you right away. That’s okey, meditation takes a while; give it time, you certainly don’t want to throw away ideas, concepts and information that you hold that is valuable. But trust me you almost certainly have assumptions about politics, religion, history and the future that are distorted; everyone does. How can you get that stuff cleared out of your thinking so that it doesn’t prevent you from becoming the best that you can be; that is the question.

One meditation want do it, one or two notes in your notepad want clear up all the debri  that’s floating around in your brain. Think of this debri as weeds in the garden, your goal is to weed out what is unnecessary and what threatens to prevent it from killing the good fruit.

Paul the Apostle, once wrote that when he was a child he thought as a child but when he became a man he put away childish things. So what you want to clear out is stuff that’s out of date.

I once spent some time with a young student from Iran, he was here in the states to study and possibly to become a citizen. He was intelligent but very confused, his old culture and his old concepts of reality were being challenged everyday. The reason that he wanted to spend time with my family was to help him sort out the old and the new, to try and get a grip on who he was and more importantly what he wanted to become.

You may not be from another country but you can be sure that your own country has changed enough to leave you confused if you haven’t taken the time to debrief and clear out the debri from the past.

Looking for Certainty

When many people look for meaning and clarity in life they look for certainty. But certainty is illusive; whether you are trying to find certainty in your religious beliefs or in other departments of your life; to be absolutely set on any one opinion is likely to lead you to a dead end.

Last night I sat across a banquet table from a very big guy who was very certain of his belief system. As he talked it became clear that he had accepted several beliefs that had been passed down to him without studying them through or questioned their validity. I knew most of the people in the room and realized that his shallow opinions would not have been readily accepted by them, yet he talked on not realizing that others thought of him as backward.

When it comes to political beliefs one should be aware that it is a huge subject and that major change happens within each belief system every few years. If you go back and trace the history of conservative and liberal thought over the past 500 years you can see these contrasting opinions have changed from one country to another and from one period to another.

Certainty is not what we should be looking for but rather for  wisdom. At one time someone could have said, with certainty, that the only way to get from America to England would be to take a ship. That is no longer true. Truth changes, although many people still hold that it doesn’t. But if you want to get your stuff together then you must discard that which is no longer true or either no longer relevant. If you can’t get over this hurdle then perhaps more meditation is in order.

Setting Priorities on Relationships

Here is where stuff can really get confusing. Best to take the old route and settle down with one mate, a mate that you make a solemn commitment to. A person with whom you decide to take on the vicissitudes of life together. Choose carefully, choose slowly and realize that in the end it is a mutual choice.

Put priority on your marriage relationship. Realize that it means building a bond with his or her relatives and that once you are truly into a marriage it soon grows into an ever widening circle of friends, this is the beginning of a good life but only if you realize the value of this ever widening group of friends. But if this gets too involved, too complicated and demanding learn to throttle back and keep the man/woman relationship intact. Remember the priority is first on the the marriage itself. Soon there will be children and with them the joy and the responsibility of parenthood.

Few of us get through life without having trouble with the people we associate with and with our mates as well as people on the job. But if you are determined to get your stuff together and keep it together you will have to give a lot of attention to what holds things together and also to what pulls them apart.

Am I Talking to You?

When it comes to getting your stuff together you might wonder if I am talking to you. Here’s a

way to tell. Today I dropped off a young man at the areas Plasma Center so that he could raise some money by selling his blood. From there I went directly to a funeral of a long time friend. The contrast in circumstances was striking. Neither party was where they wanted to be but the family that was dealing with death really did have their stuff together. They had plenty of insurance, had talked over what they wanted when that time came and there will be enough money left to take care of the surviving spouse.

The other party, nearly thirty, would not have insurance to pay for a funeral if he were to die, did not have insurance on his car and thus had hitched a ride with me. In addition he is not likely to spend his $ 50 in a responsible way and has no plan to pull his stuff together and begin to build a life.  

So I am talking to approximately 30 million Americans who desperately need to get their Sh-t together. Yesterday! You are not building a life, not supporting a wife, children or other family members in a way that creates love and respect. At the Plasma Center at least as many women were going in as there were men. This suggests that many of you women still have your stuff strung out all over the place. Whether it’s your fault or not, this message is for you.

At this point its not a matter of who’s fault it is; its a matter of how you can get the hell out of your dilemma. It doesn’t take all that long to build a future but it will take forever if you don’t get started  and go in the right direction.

How Hard Will It Be ?

How can I roll when the wheels won’t go? Those words from an old coal miners song may be the question that you are asking yourself. That is; how in the hell can I get my stuff together in this town, in this family, in this religion? The coal miner was bent low in the mine trying to push on the coal cart but pieces of coal had lodged under the wheels and despite his effort he couldn’t get the cart to move.

One fellow I counselled with lived in the poorest county in a poor state. After looking things over I said to him; “I don’t see how you can start a life and build on it in this county. If you fully assess your community and the job situation there you may conclude that a move is necessary and that is not easy or inexpensive.

You may find that your friends or your family greatly hinders you in getting your stuff together. A single mom I know has struggled hard to make it, getting some food stamps and a child support check from time to time she barely kept things together.Then some of her “friends” in the trailer court would just happen to stop in on the days they knew she would have some cash and while two occupied her with stories and laughter the other one would get in her purse and take some of the money. So your town or your friends may be your undoing.

Your religion can also be stifling and feeding you the wrong information; information that keeps you from seeing the world clearly. Getting from where you are to where you need to be is often a daunting task.  

Gaining Power

In our culture everyone is on their own. That’s why everyone feels powerless and often helpless. Think for a moment if any of the contacts that you have, empower you. In my town there are several groups and organizations but only two add strength and power to its members. True most of these organizations do not have as part of their mission, member empowerment but thats my point. Why do I need empowerment you may ask and the answer is, you are weak, without influence, significant money or property. In short the force is not with you, the system is not on your side and unless you belong to a very unusual church it will not empower you either.

Its entirely possible that the groups that you are a part of actually weaken you as an individual. That is they may take up your time, use up your money and even create an emotional drag on your psychic.

Obviously you need a new approach if you expect to gain some power, influence and financial strength. That begins with you developing a personal mission statement. Begin by asking; what do I want from life and how can I get it legally and ethically? Go back and read the bill of rights and realize that you have that famous document as a guideline for setting your goals.

In our small county we have about 2500 black residents, they have been here for generations and yet have never been able to break through to have a leader, a professional or a thought leader. Sure they are dealing with an invisible ceiling and a subtle push back from the white community. This push back is so entrenched and so pervasive that no one even thinks about it in a conscious way.

You may be female, hispanic are trying to rise from a poor white mans background as I have.

But think for a few minutes about my black neighbors; if you were in their shoes, what would you do, what could you do to break out and get your share of power, prestige and respect?

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Learning to Rise

In our community now; there are quite a few hispanics. More than any other group they have found and are finding  ways to rise. By language, genes and social standing they know they have to stick together. The rednecks in the area do not understand this sticking together business. Unless of course you count their willingness to support the NRA and perhaps the Tea Party. This alignment may build their sense of pride [ and pride is important ] but both these organizations actually take from the redneck more, much more that it gives to him.

Also in our community over 51 percent of our citizens are women. During the 1990’s a half dozen women emerged as leaders but after their energy and time had passed no one has taken their place.

So much depends on leadership and binding people together in a common cause. If you are to rise and gain power you will likely have to provide some leadership. Leadership is tricky and can use up your time and energy without aptly compensating you, so you have to know what you want and see if you can get a few others to see the vision with you.

Understand that it will take time, think in terms of three months at a time to accomplish small goals with the idea that one year will hardly get you off the ground. For one thing you will probably need to be secretive while at the same time developing a mind set in a few others. One of your first goals is get free and stay free of debt. At the very least keep it manageable. You cannot be a leader and be trapped in consumerism. You will likely not accomplish worthwhile goals if you are addicted to TV or any number of handheld devices these things require time and mental energy that you will need to spend in other places.

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Leaning In

Although I have just finished warning about spending too much time on modern social media, it could serve to speed up your attempt to build a power team. Choose a pen name so that you can say what needs to be said without getting yourself in trouble. Then you might send messages that help you and others move you closer to your goal of health, prosperity and dignity

in the community. Here are a few suggestions that you might send to selected people. Remember ninety percent of all texts and social messages are just banter. You will want to put a little “ crowbar” in there and try to let in a little light.

1. Have you ever thought about the fact that if we continue to earn at the level we are now, we will die poor?

2. Was reading the WSJ and noticed that the company we work for paid out some handsome dividends to the stockholders. How come we the workers who produced the profits didn’t get any of the increase?

3. My Mom just paid out, $ 2,300.00 to get a cataract removed. It only took the doctor 15 minutes to do his work. What can we do to stop this nonsense?

You get the picture, make statements that change the conversation. Move the conversation from chatter to real problems and possible solutions. After awhile those who can be awakened to real subjects will begin to respond, others will drop away. In time you will build an intense group who want to talk about real issues and will begin to think of some real solutions. From here you can begin to make a difference.

Wrapping Up

Obviously the subject matter that we are dealing here could go on an on indefinitely but sometimes just a few words to the wise is all that’s needed. However if this short booklet has triggered something in your thought processes and you wish to continue the conversation then I invite you to email me. I will respond as time permits. jimp@safe-mail.net  

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Impressum

Tag der Veröffentlichung: 30.03.2014

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