Why should I care who they are

Hi, my name is Aaron. I'm suffering from depression. I have nobody in my life who cares, except Shawn. Shawn is my only friend who cares. My dad is an alcholic who doesnt care what happens to me, my mom..well I love her, But I don't live with her. I live with my Grandma. She treats me like shit and I feel like she doesnt care.

I was out hanging out with the couple of friends I do have. We were at the playground just sitting there. I was spending as much time with them as I could before I took the easy way out and ended it. I know, People have worse problems then me, But I just feel so useless and I don't want to live anymore.

"Aaron!" my cousin/friend yelled.

"what Tyler?" I ask attempting to keep the sorrow out of my voice.

"Kasey is on her way over. She wants us to hang out in the skatepark with her and a couple of her friends."

I nod. Kasey was my other friend. We aren't as close as I am with Shawn. Basically not at all. I have a girlfriend, Her name is Nina. Kasey hates her. I don't know why i'm with Nina. I dont really have any feelings for her. I think i'm with her because she was my rebound.

I made the mistake of getting with Emily. I honestly trusted her and had strong feelings for her. As soon as she was able to get me to screw her, She dumped me.

"Aaron." I hear Kasey yelling next to her boyfriend, Dave and 3 other girls and 1 more male.

I slowly walk over chanting 1 week slowly in my head. "Hey Kasey." I ignore everyone else not paying attention to the faces i'll never get a chance to remember. I mean, Why bother? 1 week and i'll be gone.

I fake a smile for her benefit. "You remember Heather, These are Gabby and Ever. She motioned towards A girl with blonde hair and blue streaks. Wearing an Of mice and men T-shirt and Black skinny jeans with lime green and black sandles.

"Gabby." kacey said intorducing us.

"hi." i muttered.

"And this, is Ever." she motions toward a girl with black and brown hair, a black asking alexandria T-shirt and wearing black booty shorts with black converse.

"again, hi." I say sounding unintrested. I really just wanted to get the interductions over with.

"and that's Micheal." she pointed towards a dude with a gangster style, sticking out among us all.

I nod.

"look, I have to go." The girl named Ever mutters. "Want to come Gabby?"

Gabby nods. "sure."

"Hey! ever?!? Your just going to leave me?"

"You can come to if you want, Kacey."

Kacey smiles and shakes her head. "What about Aaron?"

Ever stutters. "Look Kacey, I dont care. Bring whoever you want."

Kacey smiles. "good. Come on Aaron."

Ever walks over and grabs Micheals hand. "Can you come or do you have to go?" Ever stood on her tippy toes looking him in the eyes.

"Anything for you, Ever." Micheal says with a smile as he bends down to kiss her. she smiled. It looked like a fake smile, That puzzled me but I looked away not wanting to stare.

she lead us up the hill of the skatepark and onto the porch of a kind of pinkish house. "there." she said as she sits on the edge of the porch. Micheal leaned against the back of the couch on the porch and pulled her infront of him wrapping his ams around her. Kacey sat on the couch beside dav. Tyler sat beside Micheal and Ever. I had no idea my cousin knew her. And i just stood in her yard.

"um...Aaron... i think that was your name" I hear Ever say. "You can sit down." she pats beside her. I shake my head and sit beside Kacey on the couch.

Ever looked hurt but i just shrugged. We all sat there talking for awhile until a car pulled outfront of her house. "Micheal, You ready?" A lady asked. I'm assuming it was his mom. He nodded, Ever stood up and walked with him to the car. He opened the door. "Brandon, Get your ass back in here!" she yelled. The little kid i'm assuming is brandon, Jumped out of the van and ran to Ever.

"Ever! When are you coming over??" He screamed jumping up and down while his arms were wrapped around her legs.

"I don't know Brandon." she said. Her voice patient and sweet. "Soon, Okay?"

he smiled and jumped back in the car.

"Aaron." I turned towards Kacey.

"Ya Kacey?"

"she's got a boyfriend, Micheal."

I nod. "I know. i dont care Kacey. I have a girlfriend, Nina."

Kacey nods as Ever walked back over and plopped on Kaceys' lap. "Hey Love." She whispers and bends down to kiss her cheek.

Dav glanced over at her. "Ever, Will you please get off my girlfrined?" She nodds and moves to get off and sit on the porch floor kacey wraps her arms around her and smiles.

"don't listen to Dave. He's just a jealous asshole."

Every laughs and kisses Kacey on the cheek one more time before moving off of her and onto the floor.

I felt bad that it was her house so I scoot over as much as I can. "Here Ever." I whisper patting the empty space I just made.

She smiles. "that's sweet, Aaron, But my ass won't be fitting on there. She stays on the ground and glances out.

"Nina??!" Ever screams and rushes across the street to the girl standing there. "It's been so long!" she squels. "How are you??"

Nina smiles. "i've been fine, I've missed you though!"

It was only then that I realized, Evers' friend, Nina...Was my girlfriend Nina.

Something about her melts my heart

“Aaron, what are you doing here?” Nina screams.

I shrink back. Pathetic…my girlfriend makes me feel like a scared little puppy…God when will this end?

“Can I talk to you, Nina? Please.” I see her go to open her mouth knowing what she’s going to say I hold my hand up. “Alone.”

She nods. I wave to Kacey. “I’ll be back, are you going to be here?”

Kacey, Tyler, Gabby, and dav all nod.

I nod back and then walk behind Nina towards the baseball field. What did I have planned? Was I going to break up with her? I wasn’t honestly sure what I was thinking when I asked to talk to her alone.

I stopped. She noticed my lack of footsteps and turned around, “What is it?”

“I think we should break up.” I say emotionless. Why feel pain when you’re just going to end your life soon…Why care? I don’t. I couldn’t. Since Emily my heart has completely frozen solid and turned the darkest shade of black. Blocking out not only all the pain, But all the happiness
and caring personality that I used to be. That used to represent me.

“What did you say, Aaron?”

And yet somehow I felt guilty...Hearing the pain in her voice.

I shook my head. “Never mind… I’m just not thinking.” I give her a fake smile.

“Look, Aaron…If you want to break up, I understand.”

I nod. Not caring again…”then it’s over.” I turn to walk away from her. Obviously she doesn’t care, why should I force myself to?

I keep walking noticing she’s no longer behind me. I just shrug. Who knows, Maybe this is what she had planned.

“Hey Kacey, your still here?”

“I told you I would be” she shrugs nonchalantly.

“Yah, true.”

“But...Now I have to go.”

I shrug. “Oh okay.”

“Dav, Ever, Gabby, are you guys coming?”

I stand there dumb founded. “Where are you guys going?” I ask. Not wanting someone to leave. I’m not sure who it was, all I know is I felt the need to stall them for as long as I could.

“Walking Gabby home, Of course. You’re welcome to walk with us if you would like, Aaron, and Tyler. But you’ll have to wait outside when we go into get our stuff.”

Tyler shakes his head. “Thanks Kacey, But I actually have to be heading home for now, How about you guys catch me on the way back and we can all chill?”

I nod. “Sounds great.”

We walk to Gabbys house. Kacey, Dav, and Gabby in the front and Ever and I in the back.

I kept brushing my hand against hers. my fingers aching to hold hers.

“Ever, are you going to come in and get your stuff to?”

She glances back at me. “Can you get it for me, Kacey?”

She nods and makes her way up the steps.

Ever sits on the steps after Kacey walked into the house.

“So, Ever.” I find myself saying “that’s a beautiful name.”

She smiles. “Thank you, Aaron.” Her smile was sincere, unlike the one that seemed forced as she talked to Michael earlier.

“So what are your favorite bands?” I ask as she glances down at my Sublime t-Shirt.

She shrugs. “That’s a dumb question, Really” she says jokingly as she points at her asking Alexandria shirt.

I smiled. The first real smile I’ve smiled in awhile.

She glances up at the sky. “So…what happened between you and Nina?” Ever asks.

“She was my rebound.” I said simply. I felt like I couldn’t lie to Ever. “I got with Emily and honestly I fell for her. She just used me…and then dumped me.” I tried to keep the sorrow out of my voice, but I knew it was there. How could it not be? She broke my heart.

Ever glances over at me. “I’m going to be honest with you, Aaron…I don’t know why I’m still with Michael sometimes. I don’t even know why I got with him. He can be such a dick. He knows how to put on a good show for friends and others but trust me…Michael has no idea how to treat a girl…He’s always urging me to have sex with him and I keep telling him in not ready...has that stopped him from trying though? No. It hasn’t.”

I pursed my lips. Anger boiling through my veins. “He has no right to treat you like that.” I tried to hide the anger in my voice but failed miserably. “I’ve never liked Michael. I go to school with him and he just irritates the shit out of me.”I was shocked. I haven’t felt this much emotion explode in me for months.

Ever gave me a weak smile. “It doesn’t matter, really. I’m the stupid one who’s still with him whatever happens…I deserve…”

I could tell she was hiding something about their relationship and I was determined to find out…I felt drawn to her, a desperate need to make her feel better.

All you need to let go, Is someone else to hold onto

We sat there in silence. I wasn’t entirely sure what I was supposed to say to follow up on that. I looked over at her with a small smile on my face, “hey, no matter what you don’t deserve to be treated like him, He’s an asshole and to top it off he’s annoying as hell.”

That earned a small smile from her. “Thanks Aaron..So much.”

I glanced down at my phone as it vibrated. “hey I have to go, my gram needs help.”

She nodded

“Okay. Have fun.”

I shrugged. “not likely.”

I started walking away. “wait”

Ever looked at me. “what about Tyler?”

I mentally cursed. “ill just text him.. Can you just text him?”

She nods. “whats his number”

I hand out my hand for her phone.

“here.”she whispers.

I grab It and scowl at the picture of her and micheal sitting beside each other on the couch, Her black brown hair was in her face. She had the perfect amount of eyeliner and her hand was on his. She was wearing a green tanktop with tight blue skinny jeans, plus her black and purple converse. Simply breath taking. I smiled.

I looked over at micheal in the picture he was wearing a baggy blue t-shirt with some writing on it, blue shorts that hang well past his ass and he had on rollerblades. His hat was gray and didn’t fit in with his hair.

“uhem” I hear Ever clear her throat and then I realize what shes waiting for, I go to her contacts and add Tylers number.

“there.”

I take out my phone and text my gram to come pick me up, I give her the addres and sit on the ground with Ever waiting for her to arrive.

We sit there in silence until my grams silver car pulls up to the curve and beeps. I lean over and hug Ever, “nice to meet you.” I stand up and climb into her car.

“who was that, aaron?”

I shrug. “Ever.” I finish saying as she drives away. I glance out the window as her face goes past, I could swear I seen an echo of pain in her eyes.

*Everr*

I sit and stare after the silver car with aaron in it. He was kind. I never expected him to be like that after Kacey told me what happened to him. How could someone put up with so much?

I glance beside me waiting to see Kacey emerge. When she doesn’t come out in the next 5 minutes I shrug and walk in the house and head upstairs to Gabbys’ room.

“Did you see how he was looking at her?” I heard someone say, I recognized the voice as Kaceys’

“Who aaron?”

No response.

“it doesn’t matter, he wouldn’t dream of it.”

I stand there trying to figure out what they were talking about. When they remained silent I tip toed halfway down the stairs and made my footsteps heard as I walked up them. “Kacey, Gabby?” I call just incase they didn’t hear my footsteps.

“Oh hey, Ever.”

“whats taking so long?”

“oh we were painting our nails.”

I glance down and for the first time notice that they have nail polish bottles and napkins scattered all over. I smile as I smell the familiar scent of burnt cookies.

“please, tell me you did not try to make cookies again, Kacey?”

Kacey’s smile disappeared “shit! Gabby I told you to remind me!” she rushed out of the room and into Gabbys’ kitchen.

I smiled. Kacey was a good friend, Not the best but she was good considering her boyfriend being almost famous? I know how that sounds but im serious that dude has some serious talent.

“Look, aaron left. I just came to let you know that I was gonna head home to, I’ll text you some time.”

Kacey walked towards me. “grr fine. I was going to ask if you wanted to stay at Gabbys’ again?”
I shook my head. “no, I really need to get home.”

She shrugged and hugged me. “Okay baby.” She said with a wink.

I laughed and walked out the front door.

For the first time in months I thought about someone other than Jamie as I laid in bed.

Impressum

Texte: Mehhh(:
Bildmaterialien: Google(:
Lektorat: Mehself(:
Übersetzung: Mehself(:
Tag der Veröffentlichung: 24.10.2012

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Dedicated to all the people mentioned in this book, They're all real, However their names were changed. I love you all♥