Finding Myself

I recall that night as easily as a child remembers their first taste of ice cream. I had said it so smoothly, like hard liquid, “I don’t care about anything anymore.” The words were harsh, full of a solemn tone. My heart just kept telling me, “Why should I care, when it’s not worth it?” There continued to be a hard pounding in my head. It felt like it had been the worst thing that I had ever done. Rean had just stared at me with sad eyes, like I had ripped his heart out. He doesn’t understand that ever since I got back from Paris, I haven’t been the same. My accent stronger, my skin darker, the new sparks that would come out of my fingertips. Okay, so having magical powers is definitely new.

It started on my second day in Paris. I didn’t even know magic existed. Not until purple sparks began to appear and I turned my dog into a rabbit and it started hopping around my room. I was scared at first; I thought there was something wrong with me. My Aunt found me in my room, curled into a ball, staring at the rabbit sitting in front of me. “What’s wrong?”Aunt Louise asked. Then she saw the rabbit and my hands, the magic still sparkling off my fingertips. She ran to me with urgency and spoke quickly, “Maria, I should've told you sooner. You’re a mystic. As am I, you’re powers don’t come until your 17th birthday. Your parents sent you here so I could teach you how to use your powers.” “A mystic?” I had asked, in shock. After that, Aunt Louise turned my dog back and he ran up and crawled into my lap as if nothing had happened. That month that I was in Paris, Aunt Louise showed me and taught me everything that a mystic needed to know. She explained that I should only use my powers when I needed them, not for my own benefit and that my parents weren’t mystics like I am. They’re mortals, just normal humans because the mystic gene skipped every other generation. I thought everything was fine, until I got home.

I still can’t get over what happened between Raen and I. I remember his words exactly, “There’s something I’ve been meaning to tell you ever since you got back from Paris.” “What is it?” I had asked, settling into an armchair in the middle of the room. He had walked toward me then with wistful eyes that made his pale green eyes look so much brighter. He then spoke, “I am in love with you, Maria Elizabeth Montgomery.” At first, I had been shocked, but then touched. I realized that I loved him too. I smiled and rose out of the chair then frowned. I recalled a detail Aunt Louise had said, “A mystic can never date a mortal. There are laws against it.” I had walked toward him, grabbing his hand as I spoke, “Raen, I have something I have to tell you as well. I found out something while I was in Paris.” He waited, his eyes full of worry and his shaggy dark red hair falling in his face. I then continued, “I’m a mystic, meaning I have magical powers.” I remember how his eyes had widened and how upset he was when I told him that I didn’t care anymore because I couldn’t be with him, be with a mortal.

I have now decided to go see Raen, see if I can get him to understand that it’s not my choice. By the time I arrive at Raen’s apartment, it's half-past 2 and he’s walking out the door of his apartment. He stopped short when he saw me and immediately began to speak when he was close enough. “What are you doing here, Maria?” he said, a stern tone in his voice. He never called me ‘Maria’, always by ‘Beth’. “I want to talk to you.” I said the words flowing out like water. “Well, I gotta go by the coffee house.” “Then I’ll go with you.” “Suit yourself then.”A taxi rolled up then and I followed Raen into the taxi. Strange to get a taxi that quick with the traffic in San Francisco, but do I really know everything about it?

“Okay, say what you need to say.” Raen said, settling into a chair, laying his coffee down on a table. “Raen, you should know it’s not my choice to not be with you. I love you, Raen, but I like I said, there are rules against us being together. There’s nothing I can do.” I say with sad eyes. He grabbed my hand then, my pale brown hair splashing in my face as I raise my head up to face him. He speaks then, looking in my pale blue eyes, “Beth, it shouldn’t matter. I care the world about you and I don’t care about any stupid rule.” “I don’t know, Raen. It’s dangerous and risky. I could hurt you and not even mean to.” “You could never hurt me, Beth.” “You don’t know that.” “Yes I do.” He kissed me then, his lips warm on mine, and he moved his hand to cup my face. He lifted away from me and spoke so simply, “I love you.” I looked into his eyes and replied, “I love you too.”

I have decided to see Raen secretly; I have realized that after we kissed that day in the coffeehouse that I can’t live without him. The thing is, I’m still a mystic and that’s something I cannot get rid of. It’s in my blood, it’s who I am and I have to live with it as long as I live. Its hard being a mystic though, especially trying to control your powers. When you’re a new mystic, like me, it’s quite difficult. Most mystics have been doing this for years, so they know what they’re doing, me, not so much. I just get afraid that if I mess up a spell or my fingers shoot out something uncalled for, that I may end up hurting someone, even Raen.

Right when I got home, I opened the alchemy table that Aunt Louise had given me as a parting gift. I miss her every day, her flowing blonde hair, her slender form, and perfect mystic intelligence. As I thought about the last potion she taught me, Aunt Louise suddenly appears in front of me. I run to her, hugging her tightly. “What are you doing here? How did you get here?” I say, stepping away from her. “This.”, she said, holding out a round smooth stone, giving off a bluish glow. “All you have to do is hold it in your hands tightly and it will take you wherever you’re thinking of. I could show you, if you’d like.” “Of course I want to.” She pulled out another pale stone like the one she held in her own hand. She laid it in my hand and it began to glow a bright purple. “I’ll do it with you; we’ll travel to Florence, where your cousins live. Just hold my hand and grip the stone in your other hand.” I grabbed for her hand and closed my eyes and thought of Florence, with its green pastures and stone houses, covered in ruins.

It is as we are falling through the air, a colossal of sounds and sights around us. I finally opened my eyes and I’m on the ground, a headache starting to form. Aunt Louise is standing over me, holding out her hand. I grabbed it and she pulled me to my feet. “The first time is always the worst. Once you get used to it, you won’t fall the way that you did. You’ll land perfectly on your feet, just as I did… Now, c’mon we need to get to your cousins’ house. They’re expecting us.” she says, gesturing me to move. “They are?” I questioned, starting to walk. “Well of course, Maria, you’re the reason we’re here.”

As we approached the house, I realized that it wasn’t a house at all, but a quite huge cottage with red shutters. It looked very old as it was built in the 1800s, it actually might have been. Before we could even open the door, it swung open and a girl with curly brown hair and golden tan skin, looking about 20 years old, stood in the doorway. “I just sensed you two were here.” the girl said, smiling, her teeth gleaming like pearls. “You sensed us? I said with abrupt curiosity. “Oh I guess Louise didn’t tell you, I’m part werewolf.”

We’re now sitting on a big couch, a glass of tea in my hands. “I didn’t even know werewolves existed.” I said, staring into my glass. “Of course they do. Sweetheart, there is so many things in this world that you don’t know about. In many cases, being a werewolf is your blood, as it is for my father. My mother is a mortal, but they fell deeply in love and had me. Anyways, I’ve been rude, I haven’t even told you my name. I’m Marina Creststone.” she said, her hair falling in her face. She starts to speak again, “I know this is a lot to take in, but just bear with me. I’ll let the others know you’ve arrived.” She got up then and walked into the kitchen. I turned to Aunt Louise then, who was sitting beside me, and spoke, “My cousin is a werewolf?” “Well part werewolf, she can’t completely turn, because she still have that mortal blood in her as well.” she said, fiddling with a loose string on her dress. “

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Tag der Veröffentlichung: 02.03.2014

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