LOST

I STILL REMEMBER THE NIGHT SO CLEARLY WHEN EVERYTHING WENT WRONG. I WAS A JUNIOR AT SOUTHERN VALLEY HIGH. IT WAS A SUMMER KICK OFF PARTY AT BRADS' (MY FRIENDS BOYFRIEND)HOUSE. WHEN WE ARRIVED THE HOUSE WAS FULL OF JUNIORS AND SENIORS. FULL OF JOCKS AND JOCK-ETS AND NERDS. MY AT THE TIME FRIEND AMBER WILLINGSON ABANDONED ME TO GO MAKE OUT WITH HER BOYFRIEND. I WAS BORED AND LONELY. I THOUGHT THAT I MIGHT AS WELL GET DRUNK. I DRANK FIVE BEERS BY THE TIME I MET UP WITH THE SCHOOLS MOST POPULAR BOY. HE WAS THE FOOTBALL CAPTIN AND HE WAS A SENIOR.
I TAKE A DEEP BREATH IN MY ROOM..AND...I'M THERE...AGAIN.....
HIS NAKED BODY PRESSING MY CLOTHED ONE INTO THE BED..THE RIPPING SOUND OF MY SHIRT AND BRA..HIM TUGGING AT MY WAIST PULLING OFF MY JEANS AND UNDERWEAR...HIS TONGUE BEING SHOVED DOWN MY THROAT...AS HIS HANDS RUBBED MY CHEST...TOUCHED MY PRIVATE PARTS....HIS MEMBER SLIDING IN ME...POUNDING ME INTO THE BED.......THE NIGHT I LOST MY VIRGINITY....

I SCREAM OUT LOUD UNTIL I CAN'T BREATHE AND I'M BACK TO THE PRESENT. MY TENSED BODY SLIGHTLY RELAXING. I LOOK OVER TO MY ALARM CLOCK WHICH READS 6:45AM. I LIFT MY WEAK BODY SLOWLY OFF MY BED TO GET DRESSED. I PUT ON THE BAGGIEST SWEATPANTS I FIND, TO COVER UP MY STILL SWOLLEN LEGS. I FIND MY LONGEST T-SHIRT. COVERING UP MY BRUISES. I RELEASE THE BAND AND LET MY HAIR FALL FREE AROUND MY FACE, GIVING ME THE PROTECTION I NEVER HAD. I FIND MY SUNGLASSES AND PLACE THEM ON MY FACE, BLOCKING MY SOUL FROM REVEALING ITS SELF TO ANOTHER.

I LEAVE MY HOUSE NOT EATING BREAKFAST,....OR BRUSHING MY TEETH,....OR COMBING MY HAIR....
WHEN I ARRIVE AT SCHOOL I LOOK AT THE CURSED PLACE KNOWING I WOULD HAVE TO WALK IN...AGAIN.
AS I WALK DOWN THE HALLS ALL I HEAR IS PEOPLE CALLING ME NAMES,.....TAUNTING ME,...TORMENTING ME,...TEASING ME,...HARASSING ME,...BULLYING ME.
ALL THROUGH MY CLASSES I HEAR GIGGLES AROUND ME AND HOOTS TO MY NAME....
AT THE END OF THE DAY I HAVE LESS DIGNITY THEN WHAT I STARTED WITH...IM SO FOCUSED IN MY THOUGHTS THAT I BUMP INTO A HARD WALL. I LOOK UP TO SEE A MALE FACE FULL OF CONCERN. HE SEEMED TO BE MY AGE AND WAS WAY TALLER THEN ME....
I PICK UP THE BOOKS THAT I NOTICED DROPPED AND I TRY TO WALK AROUND HIM BUT HE BLOCKS ME.....I SUDDENLY FEEL ANXIETY AGAIN...LIKE I DID THE OTHER DAY...
HE LIFTS UP HIS HANDS IN A NO HARM GESTURE....I THEN LOOK HIM IN THE EYES EVEN THOUGH HE CAN'T SEE MINE. HIS EYES WERE DIFFERENT...ALMOST CARING...I TOOK OFF MY SUNGLASSES...REVEALING MYSELF....MAYBE IT WAS THE START OF SOMETHING NEW....
THE END

Impressum

Texte: 4/22/12
Tag der Veröffentlichung: 23.04.2012

Alle Rechte vorbehalten