Vanessa

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Chapter One

Vanessa: POV

 

You know how despite the risks, you do something anyway? Despite the fact that your mother tells you no you can’t go somewhere and you go there anyway? Well, that’s me. Vanessa Williams. I’d asked my mother and father a week ago if I could go to a house party one of my friends was throwing at school because I had never been to one and wanted to see what it was like, and of course. Like the stick in the mud parents they are, they told me no. Can you imagine how I felt when my mom spoke no first and my dad took her side on the matter?

 

Every time I asked him about something his response was, What did your mother say? I would get floored and try my hand at persuasion. “Dad, don’t you think you could make your own decision instead of asking her?”

He’d shake his head and refute. “What she says goes.”

“If mom said jump off a cliff would you do it just because she said so?” He’d looked up from his desk and with the same majestic – that’s what my best friend called them, green eyes I wore.

Eyes that had a gold light that always seem to shine through when he found something particularly amusing, like the comment just made, he laughed, “Only if she was jumping with me.” I glared at him. This is what I hated about them. They always took each others side no matter what. To me it didn't make any sense for them to do so because, well, I didn't get what I wanted. I hated not getting what I wanted. As a matter of fact, I was one of the few people who wished they'd get a stupid divorce. They were like an old married couple.

 

I guess the fact that they’d been together since high school made them that way. Mom absolutely refuses to talk about their high school years, while dad doesn’t seem to mind. He just did it when mom wasn’t around to be the nagging bitch that she was. I wished I had a different mother. She was so damn stuck up and prude that at times I couldn’t stand being around her. And as of lately, this seemed to be happening more and more. I was upset because I was in my last semester as a freshman at Tiger Hill High. I know unbelievable name right? Sounds like something out of a damn make believe city. In a couple of more months I’d be fifteen and a sophomore in high school, but did that matter to her. No it didn’t. She was just out to ruin my life.

 

You see, I had decided that I wasn’t going to let that happen. Despite the fact that I was only fourteen, I knew I was mature enough to handle something so simple as a party. So, Tamarah, my best friend and I concocted a plan so that I could go to the party with her and my boyfriend, who by the way, my parents hate. There’s no surprise there. If they had their way, I wouldn’t date. But hey, what can I say? I’m the type of girl that finds ways over and around getting what I want.

 

This was one of those times where I’d go over and under. I’d acted my usual self throughout the day so that they wouldn’t know what was happening. Around five o’clock that evening, I’d gotten out my clothes for the party; a pair of denim hip huggers with a pair of Fendy red heels that matched a favorite red blouse of mine. The blouse, a silk off the shoulder number with the bottom of it loose enough to tuck into your jeans and poof out, making it look elegant on a lovely, shapely, figure as my own. It made my eyes look even more magnificent than they already were. I waited till I heard them go upstairs and go to bed before I started to get dressed around eight o’clock that night.

 

After I got dressed, I rubbed some gel in my hands and ran it through my hair and brushed the strands, so that my hair would stay smooth and straight til it reached my shoulders, where it would curl at the ends. My dark black curly hair I’d inherited from my father. As a matter of fact, the majority of me I’d inherited from my dad. What I didn’t understand was how he and my mother got along so well with them being so different.

 

 

I grabbed a pair of gold encrusted sea shell earrings I’d gotten while on vacation one summer and put them in my ears. Then carefully I applied my make up. I preferred the dark dramatic looks.

 

I flickered my gaze in the mirror and approved of what I saw. My dark blue eye shadow looked great with my skin tone, giving my eyes a more intense green look. The mascara made my eye lashes look even longer and fuller than they already were and the light blush I’d applied to my cheeks blended in beautifully. My lipstick was called fire starter; A deep shade of red that I loved to wear. I smacked my full heart shaped lips and felt the excitement turn into giddiness. For once I was going to be able to do things my way and get away with it. I couldn’t believe I’d gotten this far. I grabbed a light jacket because according to weather reports it was going to be cool out tonight and I wasn’t one to be unprepared. I grabbed my purse and searched around in it. I had everything I needed, including the condoms that I was sure me and my boyfriend Tommy would use tonight in one of the spare bed rooms at the party.

 

One of the reasons I’d decided to go was because he and I were going to go all the way tonight, with no interruptions. My friend Alicia had said we could use the spare room in the basement and just make sure that we locked the door before anything happened. We didn’t want our business spread around school. We liked to keep things low profile. I sighed and placed the purse strap over my head in between my left should blade and watched as it settled in across over my chest. I kept the purse snug tight to me. Opening my window, I crawled out onto the sturdy trellis.

 

As I worked my way down I smiled at the victory I knew was coming. I had my cell phone clipped to my hip in case Tamarah or Tommy called. They were supposed to meet me around the corner. As I climbed down the trellis and jumped the last bit, I turned to walk toward the street. As I did, I heard a voice speak, “I knew you were up to something. I just couldn’t prove it at the time.”

 

I felt rage spark in me and I turned to face my mother, and replied back with immediate anger, “Well you know what, if you weren’t such a stick in the mud all the time then maybe I wouldn’t have to do this.”

She stared at me with fire in her almond shaped eyes, “Maybe if you were more trust worthy I wouldn’t mind you going out this time of night Vanessa, but the truth is, your behavior is ridiculous. Your father and I both told you that you couldn’t go to that party, yet here you are sneaking out of your bed room window. Do I have to get bars put up just to keep you safe?”

 

“Safe? Mom! Bars are for prisons, not houses. I’m fourteen years old and I’m able to make my own decisions. I’ll be fifteen this summer. I can make good decisions.”

She put her hand on her hip and yelled, “This is what you call making good decisions? Vanessa, do you know how many predators lurk out in the world?”

“Predators? Seriously mom! This damn town is so sleepy and boring, even they wouldn’t want to come here.”

“You know what, I’m done arguing with you. Go in the house and take off those clothes and make up.”

“Mom!” I yelled, feeling the anger with her I had boil over. “Why are you such a bitch?”

“Excuse me?” Her eyes got big as she gawked at me.

“Why do you always keep me from having fun? You want to keep me cooped up in this house day in and day out.”

I watched her take a deep breath and then I felt the rage as she stated in an obnoxious way,“Why do you act like such a spoiled brat? Temper tantrums are for four year olds, not fourteen year old girls.” Her hands balled tightly into little fists, and I had no doubt that she wanted to hit me. This caused me to shirk back a little, as in a cold tone she cleared her throat and began her next sentence,“ Since I’m being a bitch, I’m going to show you how much of a bitch I can be. I’m going to drop you off at school and pick you up. You’re going to wash everyone’s clothes in the house for a week and you are not allowed to leave the house until I say you can leave. You will help me with everything around here, no hanging out with Tamarah or that damn Tommy boy. The only thing you will be allowed to do is eat, sleep, breathe, and do homework at my command. That’s a bitch for you.”

I stomped past her and yelled, “I hate you.”

“I think that’s already been established.”

 

~ ~

“Where’s V?” Tommy inquired, his gaze going to Tamarah. Tamarah shrugged her shoulders, “I don’t know. She was supposed to be here a half an hour ago but she hasn’t shown up.”

“Really?”

“Yes.”

“Do you want to just go to the party anyway?”

“Should we?”

“Have you tried calling her?”

“Yeah, but there’s no answer.”

“Same for me. I think it sucks that she stood us up like this but we may as well go.”“She didn’t stand us up.”

“What happened?”

“Her mom probably found out and didn’t allow her to come.”

“That woman’s a bitch. I can’t stand her uptight ass.”

Tamarah laughed, “She does it because she care about her.”

“Ain’t that much care in the world. She need to let her live a little or Vanessa’s going to be wild as hell when she get out on her own.”

“ Vanessa said she’s moving out right after graduation and she’s going to accept a school as far away from here as possible.”

“Good for her. Who wants to live with a damn tyrant all day. Not to mention what kind of man her father is, he can’t even stand up to his own wife. If that was me I’d be like, shut the hell up and let her be a teenager.”

Tamarah laughed, “You’re stupid Tommy.”

“Are we gonna go to this party or what?”

Tamarah started the car, still in a fit of giggles. When they arrived at Cory Dasher’s house, the drive way and the street was full of cars. There were people getting out of their vehicles and walking up the front lawn to the house. There was already people hanging out on the lawn, some talking, others making out and others drinking and eating Jello. Tamarah frowned, why would anyone bring Jello to a party like this one? She had intended to get her drink on but make sure she didn’t get too drunk. She didn’t want to end up in a ditch some where. Sighing, she greeted several people as she and Tommy made it out of the car and made their own walk toward the front door. You could hear the loud bass coming in from the house. They were bumping some rapper named Lil Chubby. As they got to the door, the glass slid open automatically. The place was crawling with teenagers both sober and drunk. Tamarah looked around, all the furniture had been moved from the living room and sitting area, which was big enough to engulf the entire apartment she stayed in with her mother. As soon as they walked in, people greeted her and Tommy. There were a lot of questions about Vanessa and her whereabouts. Tamarah told them that she hadn’t been able to make it. She and Tommy split up, him going toward a group of guys and her heading to the kitchen to find her first drink.

 

Timothy shook his head in annoyance with the people out on the front lawn. Half were making out and the other half were throwing up whatever alcoholic beverage they’d consumed. He despised alcohol and had plenty of reason to. Going on into the house, he made his way from the living area and into the kitchen, where there was an equal amount of stupid teenagers in there too. He watched as one kid stumbled out onto the back patio from the kitchen and went into the back yard. He continued on, forcing his way over to the fridge. Opening it, he searched the fridge for something that wasn’t alcoholic. Settling on a root beer, he closed the door and turned around. Just as he did, he felt someone hit his chest. Looking down, he saw a girl staring at him with dark black opal colored eyes. Her smooth skin was the color of maple wood on a wet day. Her long hair was straight as it hung at her shoulders. He felt a tinge of color rise in his cheeks as she glanced up at him with a smile. “Timothy Rawsin. How nice to see you.”

He felt the fear that always froze him in place whenever she was anywhere near him. As usual, he wasn’t able to do much but nod.

“I see you still don’t talk much.”

He shrugged his shoulders in response, hoping the pounding of his heart would cease at some moment.

“That’s too bad, because I’ve always thought you were quite the looker with those deep sea blue eyes and dark dirty blonde hair.”

He smiled at this. She continued to look him in the eyes. Waiting for him to speak something, but again, nothing came forward. He tried to will himself to respond to her statement, but his mouth wouldn’t follow the orders his brain gave. Instead, he did like he always did when ever she approached him. He grabbed the hand that seemed to mold itself to his chest and tenderly removed it, feeling the electrical undertones as he did so. He gave her one last lingering look and then walked away.

 

Tamarah watched him walk away from her with a sadness filling her heart. She couldn’t explain what it was about him that made her feel rejected. It seemed like every time she’d approach him to talk, he wouldn’t do anything but nod. From the first time she’d spotted him in the gym running with the rest of the baseball team, she’d been taken in by the beautiful curly hair, big blue eyes and nice sun kissed skin tone. In her eyes, he’d been the only guy to stick out with his medium height yet muscular build. He reminded her of a Grecian with his slender body. She had watched him every day during gym, until one day she caught him staring back at her. She’d smiled at him. He’d smiled back and the next time she’d seen him, she’d gone up to him without hesitation and spoken to him. All of this had occurred in January. Now here it was March and he’d yet to hint at whether he’d liked her or not. He’d always been cordial enough when spoken to, but he was a loner. She’d never seen him hang out with anyone at school, always by himself. Sighing, she went to the fridge and grabbed a cup of red jello.

 

About fifteen minutes after Tamarah had eaten her first cup of small Jello, the kitchen door opened and Tommy came in, “I see you found the Jello.”

“Yeah, I can’t see why everybody’s downing this stuff, it’s got a weird taste to it.”“Oh yeah?”

“Yeah, like some type of bitter cherry flavor. It’s nasty but good too, in a way that if you eat one, you gotta keep eating it.”

“No Jello is that good.” He stated, coming over to where she was. Pointing to the fridge, she said, “Reach in there and get one.”

Tommy reached into the fridge and grabbed a jello. “Spoons are in the cupboard if you wand one.”

 

“This Jello is the shit, man.” Tommy stated, after he and Tamarah had eaten the whole bowl. The crowd in the kitchen had already diminished, leaving them by their selves.

“I know right; but you know what, I don’t know what they put in it but I feel kinda sick and dizzy.”Tommy glanced over at Tamarah, “ You alright?”

“I’ll be ok, but, hold on a second...” She got up and ran to the nearest restroom and threw up in the toilet bowl.

~ ~

 

“Vanessa’s in her room pissed off, Jordan.”

“Is she now?” He inquired, not glancing up at his wife. He’d been in the study rearranging case files that he’d already completed, but hadn’t had the time to put back in their proper place.

“Yeah, I caught her sneaking out of her bedroom window.”“Oh yeah?”

“Yeah, she was. When I caught her, we exchanged some words.”

“Did you?” He continued to surf through his files looking for one labeled Billinger Chemical Corporation. He’d worked on this case two months ago, in which his client, the plaintiff had sued the Billinger Chemical Corporation for workman’s compensation because of an accident he’d been involved in when a piece of equipment had malfunctioned at the company. Although the employer had offered him half of the pay he’d received when working there, the employee had been let go almost immediately due to the extent of his injuries. His client James Gardner had been given full compensation and also received a settlement for their wrongful termination and he’d also received money for punitive damages. Due to the amount he’d received in the settlement, he’d been generous enough to not only give Jordan what he’d requested in legal fees but he’d also given him a bonus.

“Are you listening to me, Jordan?”

Jordan paused in what he was doing, glanced up at his wife and said, “You said something about Vaneessa sneaking off to a party and you caught her in the act.”

“Did you hear anything after that?” She inquired, her tone irritated. Denise Williams hated repeating herself. Her irritation took him back to their high school days when she’d been the same way. He’d assumed that she’d get over it, but that was a part of her personality that remained. Exhaling softly, he gave a smile and sat down on the corner of his desk. “I’m listening now Denise.”

“She called me a bitch and I...”

“She did what?” He inquired, his tone incredulous. He could feel the fuse that had been lit fire underneath him.

“She called me a bitch.”

Standing up, he got ready to walk out of the study. On his way toward the door, his wife held up her hand, “Wait.”

His tone was low and deadly as he stated, “Denise, our daughter just called you a bitch and you want me to wait. For what?”

Denise ran her hands over his shoulders, “I already handled it.”

“You handled it and now I want to go handle it some more.” He went to side step her but she inquired, “What more can you do to her than what I’ve done. She’s grounded for a month, no t.v. No cell phone, no company, just school, cleaning and her room. She’s too old for a whipping.”

 

Jordan thought about this. She was right. She’d taken away everything that mattered to her, so what more could he do? As he began to brain storm, Denise wrapped her arms around his neck. “Just let it go, baby. I’ve already taken care of it.” Although Jordan’s shoulders loosened some and his breathing returned back to normal, he knew in his mind that there was some way to make her see that how she treated her mother was wrong. He didn’t know what had gotten into Vanessa lately, but she was treading on very thin ice with him and he knew that if her behavior didn’t change, she was going to make him and her mother blow a fuse. They’d tried everything they could think of, yet she still refused to be respectful to her mother and him whenever he took her mother’s side. This, he was getting tired of. His mother didn’t raise him like that and he’d be damned before he allowed his own daughter to mistreat him and her mother. It didn’t matter how old she was, she still had to respect them.

 

 

Tamarah stopped the car in front of Tommy’s house. Her guilt evident all over her features and in her heart. How could she do something like that to her best friend? They’d been close since the second grade and now, should she find out what had happened at the party, their friendship would be ruined.

“I had fun Tamarah.” He stated, reaching out to touch her hand. She pulled her hand back, “I’m sure you did.” Her tone was full of bitterness.

“Come on T- don’t be like that. You know I’ve always liked you.”

“Sure you did, that’s why you chose Vanessa over me.”

He grinned and sighed, “Look at it this way, you got what you wanted. That’s what you’ve been itching for isn’t it?”

Tamarah exhaled, her breathing harsh, “Not from you Tommy. Vanessa is my best friend.”“If you cared that much about Vanessa Tamarah, you wouldn’t have done what we did tonight.”

“If you don’t care that much about her, why are you with her?”

“Are you jealous?”

“Uhh,No. I’m just saying you act like she doesn’t matter.” Vanessa's eyes were already clouding with anger. There was something about Tommy that made her angry all the time.

“Believe me, she has her purpose in my life." He smirked, "When the time is right, she’ll be down too. I know I’m getting closer.”

“Get out of my car, Tommy.” Tamarah stated, her stomach beginning to get Nauseous.

He leaned over and kissed her on her fore head. “I hope our little secret stay between us.”“Get out!”

He laughed but still did what she demanded and got out.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Chapter Two:

 

I was so angry over mom grounding me. I can’t stand being in this house, let alone having to do everyone’s laundry and help her clean. That was her job. She was the one who took the house apart on a daily basis to inspect and ensure that nothing was left undone. I didn’t want to do that. I feel like that’s a waste of my time. It’s boring. Anyhow, I was so angry at having been caught and having everything I had planned go down the drain. I had just finished dressing and was now making my way downstairs to the kitchen where I could smell the eggs and bacon frying in separate pans.

 

Despite how much I loathed my mother’s need to suffocate me, I couldn’t deny that she knew her way around the kitchen. She could cook anything from Ham-hocks and chitterlings, to Ramen noodle soup. Anything that woman made was good. I felt my stomach rumble as I reached the doors to the kitchen. There were three plates set out at the table. My dad, Jordan Williams and my little brother, Craig Williams sat across from one another. I was about to take a seat in front of the third plate setting when my dad said, “That’s Denise’s seat.” I looked at the forth seat with no plate setting. Maybe mom forgot to set a place for me. No big deal really. I knew she was still angry, so I went to the beige colored cupboards and grabbed a brass nob handle, reaching in I grabbed a plate. I also grabbed a glass from the farthest end of the cupboards and then reached in the utensil drawer and grabbed a fork. Bringing my dishes back to the table, I sat my own place. Just as I’d gotten everything situated, mom came to the table bearing goodies. Home made biscuits that were in a plastic bowl but covered by a paper towel. Syrup, powered sugar, raspberry topping in a container and butter and honey. Craig rubbed his hands together, “Now it’s on and popping. You hooking us up this morning ma.”

Mom sat the stuff down on the long table, which was big enough to seat eight and went back to the stove. She brought, bacon, eggs, sausage, and pancakes with her. I smiled, “That looks good ma.” She glanced over at me with a sweet smile, “Thank you sweet heart, I hope you enjoy your breakfast.” This made my eyebrows furrow. Mom never got over an argument this quickly. Dad did, but mom...no, it would be a cold day in hell before that happened. I glanced around me. Dad had a newspaper in his hand reading it. He was dressed in a black suit and Maroon tie, nothing uncommon about that. He seemed all too calm. “Sweetheart, move your hand, ok?” Mom spoke with such kindness that I moved my hand and cleared my throat at the same time. “So...did you and dad have a talk?” I inquired as she placed three pancakes,sausage and eggs on my plate.

She nodded, “We sure did, didn’t we Jordan?”

Dad glanced up from the paper at me. “Yes? Why do you ask Vanessa? Since when does what your mother and I talk about become important to you?”

I shrugged, “Well, I mean...I thought after...” My voice trailed off. If he didn’t know, why tell him?“You..you guys always have talks, that’s all.” I stated, my tone soft. I pushed my hair over my shoulders, something I did when I was nervous, and pretended to be observing the food that was in my plate.

 

A few minutes later, my brother Craig stood up from the table and pushed his chair in, “Well, I’m about to bounce, see you later people.” He grabbed his plate, took it to the sink, sat it in there and walked out of the kitchen. I watched as he grabbed his bag hanging on a hook next to the door leading off the kitchen to the garage and walked outside into the warm weather.

 

“Vanessa, your breakfast ok?” Mom asked. She’d sat down at her usual place next to dad. I cleared my throat, “Yeah, but I gotta go. I don’t want to be late for school you know.”

She nodded, “Yeah, alright, go ahead, I’ll clear the table. Have a good day.”I narrowed my eyebrows in surprise. Something was going on, mom never was nice to me. Why now all of the sudden? Especially when we’d been up fighting the night before. Exhaling sharply I stood up and glanced over at her. She was staring down at her plate. I glanced over at dad who still had his nose in the news paper he was reading. “Dad?” I inquired, feeling eerie over the silence that had encompassed the table. He glanced up at me. His dark green eyes were inquisitive. “Yes?”

“You’re not mad at me?” I inquired.

He cleared his throat. “Should I be Vanessa?”

His eyes changed colors, going from dark green to a light green with the little bits of gold lighting them. I could never get past that gaze. It always made me squirm. I hung my head in shame and stated, “Last night mom and I got into an argument and I called her a bitch.”

“You don’t say?”

I shrugged my shoulders, “I was so angry because I wanted to go to that party and she told me no. I just wanted a little freedom.” I admitted.

“Vanessa, we’ll talk about this when I get home tonight. You better get going.”I glanced over at my mom, “I’m sorry, mom.”

She smiled, “I know, just go on to school before you get the tardy bell.”I exhaled sharply and took my empty plate to the sink.

 

~

“I told you it was like reaping hot coals over her head.” Jordan stated to Denise that morning after their children had left.

“Yes you did.”

“My mom used to do that with me every time I got out of line.”“You didn’t get grounded?” Denise inquired.

“I got beat, grounded and a good meal cooked for me. The beating was because I did something, the grounding so I’d remember what I’d done and not do it again and the meal, so I’d be thankful for the things I did have.”

“Three in one, huh?”

“It worked.”

Denise stood up. “Well, I better get to the dishes.”

Jordan grasped her arm gently, “There’s something I need to talk to you about, Denise.”

Denise paused, “What is it?”

“Well...” Jordan turned in his chair to face her. He said, “Come closer, I don’t want anybody over hearing us.”

Denise laughed. “We are the only ones here Jordan.”

Jordan pulled her closer anyway, “Are you sure about that?”

Denise nodded her head, “Come on now, what are you up to?”He ran his hand down her back and over her bottom. “Nothing.” His hands squeezed gently and she smiled softly, “Nothing huh?”

He squeezed the back of her thighs as he worked his way down the silk robe she wore. “Nothing at all.” Her eyes closed and her head fell back. Jordan felt her body move closer to him. He made it to the back of her knees where the robe ended and slid his hands underneath it. “You know I love you, right.”

“Since we were sixteen years old.”

“That’s a long time.” He stated.

“Not long enough.” She gasped as his hand reached just below the cotton underwear she was wearing.

“It’s not?” He asked, feeling his body begin to respond to hers as her heat radiated from up the robe.

“No, it’s not.”

“Hmmm, how long is enough?”

“Til death.”

Jordan laughed, “Yeah, I guess when one of us kick the bucket that will be long enough.”

“Most definitely.”

He’d worked his way to the inside of the fabric. Denise bit down on her bottom lip. He moved his other hand over her chest, squeezing at her breasts. An exhale told him the effect it had on her. Her eyes fluttered closed as his hand removed the opening of the robe and uncovered them. Whimpering, she reached out, grasped his head and pulled it toward her. This Prompted him to grab the robe and pull at it. Easily, the silk fabric slid down her body, to the floor. Denise swallowed and sat down on top of him. She whispered, “You’re going to be late.”

 

Another minute or two after, her eyes glued to his anatomy, she whispered, “It’s not like you have to be in court this morning.” Jordan grabbed her and pulled her forward, his hands squeezing her bottom. He loved the feel of the smooth flesh in his hands. His gaze traveled over her body and how it had went from the firm smoothness of youthfulness. To the full beautiful roundness of woman hood.

 

Denise had never been slender, but she did gain weight while pregnant with each of her children, so while she wasn’t as small as her size seven in high school, she’d gotten up to a size nine and he found himself loving it. Her roundness did nothing but heighten his attraction to her. Her body had developed a soft feminine feel to it and this he loved. It caused him to love her warmth and treasure the way her body felt against his. His gaze traveled the length of her body and he found his manhood responding. Her breasts were round and full as they stood against her chest. He could have sat there all day staring, but was interrupted by the beautiful smooth sensation of her sliding down over him. Denise didn’t think she would ever get tired of the loving she received from him.

 

The way their soul, heart, mind and body aligned when they were together was amazing. It intensified anytime they were together. She let out a groan when she’d slid down, filling herself with his long full member. Slowly she began to ground her hips into him. As she continued to stroke him, he enjoyed the feel of her tell tale juices as they made their presence known. Jordan moved his hips up to meet hers after a while and when he did, Denise felt her woman hood clench down on him.

 

He allowed a curse word to slip out and grasped her body tightly to his as he pulled her down harder on him. Denise wrapped her arms around him and whispered, “Mmmm, I like that.” She ground her hips into him the next time he pushed up into her. He grabbed her head and pulled it to his, covering his mouth with hers. When he did, Denise let out a loud swear and her body met with his once again, and she began to shake from the orgasm that suddenly swept through her. His arms tightened around her and Jordan felt and heard it as their bodies met one final time, bringing her to a climax that hit him so hard, he didn’t seem to have any choice but to meet hers. As his seed burst forth into her, he swore for a second time and kissed her again. He could feel the trembling in her body and his as he held her close to him. When they finished, Denise ran her hands over his short spiky black hair. He’d gelled it for work and the strands that were normally soft and thick were now hard from the gel. “I needed that baby.”

“I know you did. So did I.” His tone held the usual deep relaxed drawl he’d inherited from being raised in the south.

“ I think you should get cleaned up, you’re already late for work.”“Really? I thought I’d told Bridgett I wouldn’t be coming in till noon today.” He stated.

Denise furrowed her brows, “You planned this?”

He laughed and gave her a boyish expression that she’d fallen in love with during high school. “What can I say, I’m devious.”

“What else did you plan?” She inquired, leaning in to him.

He sighed and stood up. As he did so, his pants and underwear slid down his legs. Stepping out of them he swooped her up to take her to their bedroom.

 

~ ~

Vanessa walked up to the front of the school where several of her friends waited, including Tamarah and greeted them as she did, “What’s up girls and guys?” She wanted to know. There was ten of them. Tamarah flashed a perfect smile at her and held up her hand in salute. “Hey, V.”

“What happened to you Saturday Night?” Neicee, a friend of theirs asked. She among three other people outside of Tamarah and Tommy had been waiting for her at the party this weekend. Draneice o’neal was a tall, lanky, beautiful dark haired girl who had hazel brown eyes, that would shift from dark brown to light shades of green and then to blue like a chameleon, all the time. She was of both Indian and English heritage. She was what some would call model thin. And even though she had a slim figure, she preferred to dress in corduroy pants and stripe shirts. This she’d done since elementary school and since it was typical for her, no one ever commented on it, besides, in a way, Vanessa thought it fit her slim figure. It gave her the appearance of a seventies chick. She always wore matching shoes with them, which is what Vanessa figured spurred her attraction to those type of clothing. Today she wore a color combination of purple plum with white strips on a long sleeve blouse and purple plum colored pants with white keds, which made her outfit stand out.

I know girl, but my momma had a bitch fit the other day. I swear, if I could have a different mother I would be happy dammit.” Vanessa hissed with irritation her tongue.

“Be careful what you wish for V- You may regret it.” These words of wisdom came from Athena Marks, who’d already been through the thoroughs of parental divorce and then on to step mother phase. “Sometimes, what glitters isn’t gold, honey.”

“Trust me, anything would be better than living with that woman.” Vanessa stated, pulling her back pack straps over her shoulder. As she spoke this, she thought about this morning and again mustered up the idea that something had definitely not been right with her parents. Her dad hadn’t yelled at her or said anything about her behavior and her mother had been so sweet, it made the pancakes she’d dripped in syrup and sprinkled with sugar look bitter. Sighing, she knew that her parents were up to something and bet that after school, she’d find out. “So V, why didn’t your parents let you go to the party Saturday night?”

 

Athena inquired. She cleared her throat and glanced over at Tamarah who looked uncomfortable and lost in her own thoughts. Athena gave a small smile to her, knowing full well why she looked that way. Athena who’d been toasted on the night of the party, recalled her sobering shock when she walked into the kitchen and seen Tamarah and Tommy pawing all over each other. She’d seen it and had been so surprised that she’d contributed it to them being drunk, however, when Tamarah had pulled away from Tommy during a moment of guilt-leaving Athena to witness with her own eyes him tell Tamarah to not act like she didn’t want him and pull her back to him, had her stumbling backward as she recalled how fervently Tamarah had kissed her best friend’s boyfriend.

 

The thing that intrigued her most is that Vanessa didn’t seem to notice the tension that displayed in her friend’s figure. As a matter of fact, she seemed oblivious to what was going on with Tamarah at all. The tightness of her mouth, the stiffness of body posture and even the sad look in her eyes when ever she gazed at her friend, all tale tell signs of guilt left Tamarah looking drained. Tsking silently to herself, Athena wondered what Vanessa would do if she found out what Tamarah had done with her boyfriend.

 

After the bell rang to dismantle the group, sending Tamarah and Vanessa into the same direction and the others splitting off, Tamarah flickered her long lashes over at her friend, “I think your mother over does it sometimes with the protectiveness, V- but I’m sure she means well.”

 

“Means well my butt, that woman wants to control every aspect of my life, without realizing that I’m not a little girl and I can make my own decisions now. I don’t know why she thinks I need her harping over my shoulder all the time. I’m not a five year old.” Vanessa fumed.

 

“I agree, you’re not..but that doesn’t mean she doesn’t care for you.”

Vanessa glanced up at her best friend, “What ever, T- you don’t have to worry about that. Your mother cares less what you do. You could go out partying every night and she wouldn’t care. Don’t turn in your homework and she wouldn’t even notice that you hadn’t until report cards were do.”

 

“That’s because she works a lot. Vanessa. I would kill to have someone even think of me the way your mother does you. My mom’s too busy trying to sale her way to the top of the corporate ladder to care about what I do. It’s not like we’re hurting for money, so it’s not because she works two jobs to support us, she just loves being on the top.”

“I wish my mother had half the work ethic your mom does, maybe then she wouldn’t be all up in my grill trying to see what I’m doing all day every day. It’s sickening.” Vanessa made a disgusting face.”

“Just be glad that she’s there for you the way she is. It would be great if my mom could check my homework each night to make sure it was done, prepared dinner every night and then washed my clothes sometimes. I feel like I’m the mother to her. I’m the one who cooks, cleans and do the laundry around the house because she’s never home to get anything done. Do you know last week she offered to employ a maid at our apartment?” Tamarah asked her tone incredulous.

“She did?”

“Yeah, of all things, she should be the one doing the job, not me, not the maid.” Tamarah’s tone was full of indignation.

“I wish you and I could swap Tamarah, that would be cool.”“If I could, I would.”

“Hey, baby.” both girls turned to look at Tommy Whitaker as he walked up to them.

“Hey baby, how was your weekend?” Vanessa inquired, wrapping her arms around his neck, a smile crossing over her beautiful features.

 

Tommy felt his heart beat speed up at the thought of those penetrating green eyes glossing over once he got the chance to take her. He’d spent the entire junior high school years fantasizing about what it would be like to do a lot of things with Vanessa Williams, and one of those things was to search her eyes for that look of complete satisfaction when he would be able to engage himself into the folds of her woman hood. This still brought a blush to his cheeks when thinking about it. There was just something about her that made him salivate. His gaze flickered to her best friend, who was glancing at them or rather him, distastefully. He smiled and nodded his head at her in acknowledgment. While Vanessa was luscious in all the right places, Tamarah was just rippling with sensuality.

 

Although she was just as tall as Vanessa with a five nine height, her body weight was evenly proportioned at one thirty, she had the same assets as Vanessa, with more of a slender build. Vanessa had a senusually curvaceous build that she’d no doubt inherited from her mother. Tommy had seen her mother, and Vanessa was a physical embodiment of her mother. She was shaped exactly like her and outside of her eyes, chin and ears, she’d inherited her mother’s genealogy, needless to say, the girl was gorgeous. However as he looked at Tamarah, he felt something else overtake him, something very powerful. Anger.

 

Tamarah didn’t know if it was possible to hate anyone as much as she despised Tommy. He stood there with that damn smug grin on his face like he was the best man in the world, almost as though he deserved Vanessa and in her opinion, he didn’t. He didn’t deserve her best friend. A guy with his intentions didn’t deserve a girl so sweet and so loyal to him. She wondered if he felt any remorse over what had occurred over the weekend, but judging by his actions, he hadn’t. It sickened her to her stomach the thought that he would be willing to go on and pretend that nothing happened between them, that he could sit there and lie to Vanessa that way. What made Tamarah hurt worse however was the guilt she felt over knowing that although she despised Tommy and wouldn’t ordinarily succumb to his charms, that in a drunken state, she’d readily given into the heathen. Feeling her bile rise to her throat, she covered her hand over her mouth and without a word, ran away from Vanessa and Tommy, down the hall to the girl’s bathroom.

 

 

 

 

Chapter Three:

 

Vanessa POV:

I may have looked like I wasn’t paying attention, but I was acutely aware of my boyfriend ogling my best friend. I even felt it when his body demeanor changed. It became more rigid when he looked at her. I know that he hated her and there was no bone in my body that didn’t doubt that Tamarah hated him with equal fervency. When she spoke his name, you could hear the hiss on her lips. However, as soon as she covered her hand with her mouth and ran to the bathroom, I turned to face Tommy. I was the type of girl who always had to double check, make sure my actions and thoughts both aligned. “Tommy.” I stated, my gaze turning to him.

He gave me a smile, “Yeah, V?”

“There’s nothing going on between you and Tamarah is there?” I inquired.

He laughed and shook his head no. “Why would you think that baby? You know I only have eyes for you.” He stated, reaching out to me. I shrank back. Glaring up at him in the eyes, purely out of jealousy, I stated, “That’s what your mouth says, but your eyes have a tendency to roam.”

His eyes became huge round dough balls. “Excuse me!” He exclaimed, flabbergasted. I put my hands on my hips and did that thing my mother does when she’s upset with my dad. “Don’t play with me, I saw you looking at her.” I stated. Tommy shook his head and with a laugh, he leaned down and placed a kiss on my lips. I immediately felt my body melt and all my thoughts fly full force out of the window. When the kiss subsided, I glanced up into his eyes, in which I was sure love was there and cleared my throat, “Maybe I exaggerated just a tiny bit?” He gave me that beautiful grin of his, his eyes shiny dark brown pupils, “A tiny bit? V- of all the audacity. You know how I feel about Tamarah. Trust me, I ain’t going no where.” He stated. I glanced up into twinkling eyes and allowed my thoughts to become screens of smoke in my brain.

 

 

Timothy Rawsin flickered his gaze to Tamarah. After Incessant praying and futile pleading, he still couldn’t seem to control the signs of attraction that stirred when ever he looked at her. He often times got lost in the visual prize he couldn’t help but notice with her. He was drawn to her skin. She had the most beautiful dark chocolate shade of skin he’d ever seen.

 

It was unblemished, perfect in his eyes. He tried to ask God to take away the desire for that beauty that he observed but it seemed to grab a hold of him at times and refuse to let go. He felt something in his spirit pull him toward her, but he knew by her crowd, her attitude and her style of dress that she wasn’t saved. She didn’t serve God the way he did. As a matter of fact, he doubted that she even went to church. He’d never even heard her mention God in any of her conversations with her friends.

 

He knew that as beautiful as she was, she was still off limits. Besides, for all the beauty she had, she couldn’t compensate for a christian woman’s character. He needed a woman who was saved because he himself had a fire in his spirit to serve and please God. That meant doing the things that God wanted, not what he wanted. Not that what he wanted and what God wanted were two different things, it was the exact same thing, except when it came to Tamarah. He couldn’t explain the desire he had to be near her, be around her, but he did know that a friendship was out of the question because his thoughts were anything but friendly toward her. He knew he didn’t want to steer off course and she would provide the distraction he couldn’t afford at the moment. His life was great. He’d became a christian two summers ago right before he’d been adopted by Carol and Benjamin Rawsin and he had to say, there was something about knowing and understanding the love of Jesus. Something about knowing that you could be happy, just to be happy and it didn’t require a significant incident to make you that way. Timothy had been the worst of the worst. He’d been a thief, a liar, a peddler, and all sorts of things, just to name a few. However, his life changed for the better when he moved into the Rawsin’s home. They’d shown him, compassion, love, discipline and who God was. All of those things he’d needed. Within six months

 

Timothy had shown signs of change and by the summer, he’d completely become someone entirely different. The scraggly long hair was gone. The various piercings gone, the sharp tongue, subjugated partially. Even now he had to refrain from speaking his mind too much; and the baggy ripped clothing were taken away. Aside the physical, there was a renewing of the mind and he found himself meditating in his bible all the time. His favorite thing to do was read his bible and then meditate on what he’d read.

 

Again, his gaze flickered to Tamarah and he sighed. She was a sight to behold. He loved the blue feather earrings she’d worn today, it accentuated the beautiful features of her face. His favorite color to see her in was blue. Today she wore sky blue. Sky blue earrings with matching eye shadow and a matching silk blouse that hugged her upper body in just the right way. The skinny jeans she wore accentuated the beautiful gentle curve of her hips and legs. He shook his head, turning his gaze to the classroom window. He felt like God was going to have to do something because the way he felt about her was anything but holy. He bit down on his bottom lip and grunted softly to himself. Life wasn’t fair.

 

Tamarah knew he watched her. She could feel it when ever his gaze found her. It was like sending an invisible hand to stroke down her back. What she didn’t understand was for all the staring he did, he’d never once spoken to her. Although she’d tried, she’d never succeeded at getting him to say one word to her. Often times she found herself wondering what was going on in that head of his and whether or not it was her imagining his attraction to her. She already knew his routine.

 

Once class let out, he would scoop his books up and dash out the door like someone was chasing him. She knew that at one point there had been a lot of young girls that liked him but they always complained that the only thing he seemed interested in was God. God this, God that, was all that came from his mouth, so those girls had lost their initial attraction to him and it was she who was left standing to carry that torch. She was impressed with him. The way he carried himself, the way he treated others and the way he seemed to respect everything around him. Yeah, she watched him enough to know that with him what you saw was definitely what you got, However, what she could not figure out was how to get him talking. She also knew she wasn’t one to back down from a challenge when she wanted something, and good Lord, she really wanted Timothy. That curly dirty blonde hair that went wiry over his head made her heart beat speed up when ever he walked into a room. It was because of that hair no one could ever mistake him. Those blue eyes never failed to make her swoon when ever she got the chance to look into them. They were so clear, so bright and unbelievably beautiful.

 

There was almost a spiritual quality about them that beckoned her curiosity. Tamarah shook her head and felt as though it was best to not allow her mind to roam into thoughts of that sinewy, hard muscled body connecting with hers or even being sculpted through her hands. She inhaled sharply, feeling her body respond to her thoughts. She wished with all her might that if there was a will, that there was a way to get Timothy into her grasp because she knew that once she did, he’d be hers and only hers. That she’d make sure of.

 

“Class, today I would like to introduce you all to a new project that we are going to be working on.” Mr. Wayne, their English lit teacher stated, drawing everyone, including Timothy’s and Tamarah’s attention up to the black board. Tamarah’s eyes widened. She didn’t know that you could be assigned partners in an English Lit class. What type of project could you possibly work on? As if answering that question, Mr. Wayne continued talking, “Here’s what I want you to do. I’m going to sign you into pairs. This assignment is a research project. I’ve paired off your partners already.”

Some of the students groaned because they wouldn’t get to work with who they want.

“I’ve paired you guys off with each other because the project should be easier to complete with a partner and also so that you guys won’t become overwhelmed with it’s specific requirements.”

“Will it be fun at-least?” Brooke Couliver asked,

The teacher smiled, “It involves watching a movie of your choice.” The teacher began. “However, I have narrowed it down to several films that were written in the nineteen nineties.”

Scott Farrow, another student broke out in laughter, “Why would anyone want to watch films from that time, they all said the same thing.”

“Kill, kill, kill.” His side kick and best friend, Adam stated. The students all laughed. Mr. Wayne cleared his voice and spoke above the students, “Well, you are in luck because the films on this list are entirely educational in one way or another, so there shouldn’t be any problems.”

“Educational?” Adam’s and Scott’s laughter died down as well as the other students and a simultaneous groan was heard throughout the class.

“Yes! Educational.” Mr. Wayne pushed his dark rimmed glasses up the bridge of his nose. Mr. Wayne had been teaching at Tiger Hill sense the early nineties. He wore a different suit everyday and his hair was thinning on top. He was an African American man who didn’t like the generation now any more than he had when he was growing up because it seemed everything grew worse with each generation.

 

The schools he’d attended as a child felt less like a prison than it did these days. At-least three officers were on the premises now. They each ran duty up and down the halls during class periods; just to ensure that there were no fights, no unauthorized visitors and that every student who walked in wore an ID tag. Only clear back packs were allowed and there was a strict dress code implied, not only for the students, but the teachers as well. There were no casual clothes allowed by administration on campus. Everyone wore elegant wear, which was stupid, because not all teachers were into elegant wear all the time. Mr. Wayne was one of the teachers who wasn’t, so, in his classroom, he always left the top button of his shirt undone, sleeves were rolled up and he always removed his jacket.

 

Mr. Wayne did love teaching English and he did appreciate the few good students he had in class. Of those students only five were freshmen. The others were juniors and Seniors. He reached inside the pine oak desk of his and pulled out a stack of papers. Handing them down the rows, he said, “The choice of film depends on the student and their interest, but remember, I want a thorough thesis on the film. This includes it’s writers, directors, actors, plot and the studio who produced the film. I also want the date the film came out either in theaters or released to video and I want you to tell me the significance of the film in it’s genre and what critics stated about the film and oh yes, I want your detailed opinion of the film itself and whether or not you thought the same as the critics did.

 

This is a six page paper project and you are to cite all sources of information according to the American Psychological Association. Details on format and structure of the paper are included in this document.” Another groan was issued by several students as they thumbed through the pages of the packet. “I know this is a lot of work which is why I’ve paired you off. I thought maybe you guys could decide who does the research and who write the paper. I want you all to work diligently on this and if there are any questions, please feel free to come by my office if you have any issues, or get stuck on the project. I tried to be as detailed as possible when explaining what I want in this paper. So, if I missed anything please don’t hesitate to stop in and see me.”

 

“Mr. Wayne, how long do we have to write this paper?”Mr. Wayne cleared his throat. “I’m giving you all till the week of prom to finish it. That’s the Twenty third of April. If it’s not done by then, you loose twenty five percent of your grade. I will give extensions to those who have a verifiable reason for not completing the project.”

“Verifiable?”

“Doctor’s excuse only. Read the conditions of accepting late papers. Now, with that covered, let’s move on to the next topic before the bell rang.”

Tamarah glanced up at the clock. There was ten more minutes left of class and she knew Mr. Wayne would use every one of those minutes.

“I have paired you up into groups of twos. Since there is twenty four of you in class, that wasn’t a difficult task. I expect you and your partners to exchange numbers and then schedule time outside of class to meet. I expect you to give me detail by Monday as to who will be doing what part of the assignment.” He grabbed his grade book and opened it to the page he had assigned the students in groups of two. After reading down a long list, when Mr. Wayne got to Timothy’s name, he wasn’t sure he’d heard correctly. Timothy raised his hand.

“Yes. Mr. Rawsin?” The teacher inquired.

“Who did you say my partner was?”

Mr. Wayne glanced down at his grade book. “Tamarah Grey.”Timothy let out a big sigh and closed his eyes. How was he going to get by this one. A whole six weeks of being near her would be more than what he could handle.

 

Tamarah sat at her desk with a smile on face. Things were starting to look up. It had taken a while, but her prayers were being answered. She turned to glance over at him. Timothy had a blank look on his face. With a shrug of her shoulders, she decided that by the time this project was over, he’d definitely know without a doubt she liked him, however, whether or not he liked her would solely depend on him. Tamarah furrowed her brows. She didn’t know how she would take it if he said he didn’t like her. She’d never had that happen before. As a matter of fact, the mere thought of him not liking her made her heart sink. Something she couldn’t say happened too often. Again, her gaze flickered over to his but this time a look of worry was on her features as she thought of the possibility that he may not like her.

~ ~

 

Timothy stood up and gathered his books. He turned and was about to run out of the room when he nearly ran down the person in front of him. “Nice to see that you are still the same Timothy Rawsin.” Tamarah stated a hand on her hip. She looked up at him. He was a good five inches taller than she was. He cleared his throat, “How about we get together Tomorrow at the Library and pick out what film we want?”

“I’ll do the research, you can write the paper.” Tamarah stated.

“Excuse me?” Timothy glanced down at her with a look of surprise on his face.

“I mean why not, when you are a better writer than I am.”Timothy narrowed his brows at her. “ A better writer?”

“Yes. I’m a horrible speller.”

“How would you know about my writing skills?” He inquired.

She smiled, “Because I pay attention in class Mr. Daydreamer.”Timothy found himself blushing. Maybe he did daydream a little too much. However, if only she knew what about. “I pay attention Tamarah, I just am not sure it’s a good idea to allow you to do the research on this project.”

Tamarah’s brows furrowed. “Why not?” She inquired. Timothy’s shoulders shrugged, “I don’t know if you’ve ever done research before and whether or not you will be able to find the information we need.”

Tamarah crossed her arms over each other. “And why not Timothy Rawsin?” Her tone was crisped.

“This is a junior senior level course and you’re a fresh-” Timothy started. Tamarah interrupted him,”I’m perfectly capable of doing this assignment. How do you think I got in here? I’m not a dummy.” Tamarah stated, swiftly becoming angered. Timothy sighed, his gaze going to hers. “I didn’t say you were but I do want to know if you are able to do this assignment the right way.”

Tamarah grabbed her bag and pulled the straps over her shoulders. “I can do this Timothy Rawsin, it’s not rocket science.”

“Well, we can get together tomorrow and decide what movie we want to view.”

Tamarah’s mouth formed a smile. “That’s fine Timothy Rawsin. Let’s do that.”

“Will you stop calling me by first and last name. Timothy is just fine.”

Tamarah stepped closer to him, her feet nearly touching his, “I like Timothy Rawsin.”Timothy stared her in the eyes and swallowed nervously. His heart did flip flops as the smile she wore got bigger. He exhaled, turned and walked out of the door.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Chapter Four:

 

“We’re having a revival this weekend at church, if any of you are interested, you’re welcome to come.” A young girl of about fourteen years old stated. She pulled a flyer from out of her hand and slid it onto the table amidst a group of girls who were laughing about something. She went from that table to the next, a group of cheerleaders, and took a flyer out and slid it onto the table. One of the girls picked it up and started reading it out loud. “Weekend Revival, at House of God, on Sunday March 13 2018 special guest Pastor Michael Renald from Burbanks California House of God Pentecostal Assembly.”

“Sounds like fun.” Another cheerleader stated, her tone overly perky. Surprisingly, other heads began to nod. “Yeah, Kalen, can I have one?” Beverly Andrews stated, flipping her dark blonde hair over her shoulders. “Yeah, me too.” A football player stated.

 

After handing them their fliers Clarissa Max, a tall athletic African American girl cleared her throat uncomfortably. She was the most athletic girl on the team, nimble from plenty of years of gymnastics, palates, and dancing. Although Kalen knew it wasn’t necessary to give her one, she felt an urge in her spirit to do so. Kalen whispered,”Why? She knows the gospel.” As she hesitated, a voice spoke into her mind, “I did not come to call the righteous but sinners to repentance.” Immediately overcome with sorrow, she handed Clarissa a flyer. Clarissa took the flyer and glanced down to look at it. As she did, she was momentarily distracted as papers crumpled and she heard it as they flew out at the young girl in front of her. Immediately she tucked her flier underneath her trapper keeper and howled along side the other students as they laughed at Kalen, who just stiffened her shoulders and hardened her eyes. “Don’t no body want to go to church with you you freak!” This came from a football player, Davion Matheson.

“Yeah, what you want us to come out looking like you? No style what so ever?”

“Take them clothes back to the good will.” Another voice stated, this was from Beverly Andrews.

“Blessed are you when they persecute you for my name sake.” A voice whispered in her mind, giving her comfort. Kalen found herself smiling at this.

“Get out of here!” A voice stated. She glanced over at Davion Matthews and saw a hard look in his eyes. She glanced at him, her eyes soft and kind, “Jesus loves you too, Davion Mathews.”

Davion felt a small warmth begin in his heart, but he pushed it down, pulling at the other emotion that was also there. “Why don’t you just go somewhere else! We don’t like you!” His tone came out harsh.

Kalen cleared her throat and said in a sweet tone, her eyes running over all at that table. “It’s sad that the things you guys hold so dear to your heart means absolutely nothing, when compared to the glory of Christ.”

Davion, who felt irritated by her, stood up and with all the anger he had in him, stated, “I don’t need to hear this bull crap, I’m out of here.” He stood up and took his plate, not knowing where he was going, but thankful that she wouldn’t be there.

“Me too, I don’t want to hear this speech. It’s like the same recycled garbage over and over.” Beverley agreed as she stood and took her leave as well, following Davion. Slowly but surely, the entire table stood up getting ready to leave. The last one to leave was Clarissa, whom Kalen looked in the eye. As she did, Clarissa cleared her throat, “I really would hate to be you.” Kalen was astounded that her voice did not sound mean or even vindictive as usual, but it held some sort of sympathy for her. Kalen smiled, “I’m not worried. Christ says the world hated him. Why would it treat me any different? I have a peace in him and that’s all that matters.” She stated. As she said this, Clarissa wrinkled her brow, pausing next to the table as she got ready to take her leave. “But everyone hates you, Kalen. It’s so bad that no one likes you. Your brother they barely tolerate.”

“That may be so.” Kalen stated, “But, my brother and I have something that you guys can’t even begin to comprehend...” She stated.

Clarissa put her hand on her waist. “I don’t need you to tell me about Jesus. My family goes to the same church you go to.”

“And yet you remain in sin, Clarissa. Trying to find your way to the top.”Clarissa laughed, “Sweetheart, I don’t need to find my way to the top. I am at the top.”

“The top of what?” Kalen inquired.

“The Captain of the cheerleading squad. I’m on the debate team, and darling I’ve lead our school to many state champion chips when it comes to the drill squad.”

“Yeah, I suppose, but what about the fact that you only have one life, one soul? The fact that once you die, you can’t go and undue that Clarissa?”

Clarissa shrugged, “If I only have one life, I may as well make the most of it Kalen, and serving God isn’t going to be beneficial to me. I don’t want to be treated like you. I don’t want to dress like you either. Have you taken a look in the mirror lately?”

Kalen sighed and shook her head, “God doesn’t look at the out side appearance Clarissa. He looks at the heart and based on that alone, who do you think would win, me or you?”

Clarissa pushed her straight hair over her shoulders. “This is why I left the church. Why I stopped going, you all think the same way. You all think you are holier than thou when it clearly says in the bible that none of us is righteous, we are all sinners.” She blurted out, immediately filled with anger, her tone defensive.

Kalen sighed, “That’s true, atleast we “all” have the decency to admit that we have sinned and that we need Jesus, Clarissa. Nobody thinks they are better than you, but we happen to love the Lord and because we love him, we do what he asks us to do.”

“Oh you mean openly walking around like the pharisees, letting people know that you are saved and condemning other people to hell because they don’t believe like you do?”

Kalen felt the frustration begin to build up in her. “What would you have me to do Clarissa? Let people think that what they are doing what is right when you know, just as much as I know that there is an after life and we will all be judged according to our acts on earth. You, me, and everyone on this planet will. So excuse me if I feel like that matters more than boys, clothes, the mall and all those other frivolous activities you guys partake in on a daily basis.”

Clarissa folded her arms over her chest. “I don’t believe what you believe. I don’t believe I’m going to hell.”

“If not then why are you folding your arms and puffing out your chest?” Kalen inquired.

Clarissa felt something in her heart explode. Glancing over at Kalen with anger in her eyes, she seethed. “I wish you would leave this school. Better yet this town, because honestly, I hate you. I wish you and your family would have stayed away. We really don’t need you here. You are like a parasite that infects everything it touches.”

Kalen felt something so powerful well up in her that she just wanted to reach out and slap her and she opened her mouth to condemn Clarissa, when she felt a hand on her shoulder, and a sharp tone rose to her defense, scolding Clarissa as he spoke, “The stone the builders rejected, which means you Clarissa, has become the cornerstone. Everyone who falls on that stone will be broken, however, unfortunately for you who know the truth and don’t accept it, that stone is going to crush you.” Immediately Clarissa’s eyes went up to Kalen’s older brother and felt a trembling begin in her body. “Timothy Rawsin.” She hissed. Timothy’s eyes got hard, prepared for battle. “Have a nice lunch, Clarissa.” As Timothy turned his sister away from her, Clarissa was filled with so much indignation that she whispered, “I wish I could kill them. I wish that I could just wipe them off the face of the earth.” Even as she spoke this, tears pooled in the corners of her eyelids. She hated that they acted like Jesus was their everything. She hated that they acted like they were too good to be with the other kids. She hated that they acted like the only one that ever mattered was Jesus. Inhaling sharply, Clarissa admitted for the first time in her spirit that she hated Timothy and that she hated Kalen. They were too good. Too nice. Nobody should be like them. She didn’t know it just yet, but that hatred would open the first door of many.

 

~ ~

“That girl makes me so angry.” Kalen whispered, finally allowing her tears to flow down her eyes as she and Timothy walked off campus after School. “I know. It’s hard to believe that you and her were once friends.”

“Yeah before I decided to get serious about God. As I got serious, she drifted away more and more. Look at her. She’s a junior just like you and look at how she dress, how she act, how she is...”

“Don’t judge her Kalen. You may not approve of her, but that doesn’t make you any better.”

“I’m not saying I’m better, I’m just saying that everybody at that damn school act like they better than we are, that they are cooler because the girls wear mini skirts and heels and talk about boys and clothes and all that stupid stuff. It makes me sick that they can sit here and call us Jesus freaks, tell us they hate us and tell us that we are nothing because we believe in Jesus and obey the bible. I mean, Timothy, they even make fun of our clothes.”

Timothy smiled, “Honestly sweetheart, they make fun of your clothes not mine. I wear jeans and t-shirts at times.”

Kalen shrugged her shoulders, feeling the tears burn in her eyes, “Tim,” She whispered. “What’s wrong with the way I dress? I wear jeans and a t shirt too.”

Timothy smiled, “More often than not you wear long skirts that don’t go above your knees. You wear no make up and the shirts you wear, let’s say they are a bit out of date.”

Kalen smiled up at her big brother. “What are you trying to say?”

He held his hand up in a truce, “Nothing, just that I love you the way you are.”

“Long skirts and all?” She whispered.

“Yep, long skirts, nappy hair and no make up and out of date shirts. I love you because it’s you.”

Kalen laughed, “Aww, thank you.”

“However, I have to ask why you always wear your hair platted in those same two french braids. I mean, you have been wearing french braids since we first met.” As Timothy looked down at her, he recalled how they’d first met when he was thirteen and she was ten. She’d been wearing two french braids like the ones she wore now and jeans, a disney princess T-shirt and a pair of keds. When he first saw her, he thought she was cute until she opened her mouth, then she became annoying, always wanting him to talk to her and spend time with her. He remembered how at one point he found himself hiding from her. It was strange because he’d be rude and disrespectful to the Rawsins, his adoptive family and she would always chastise him for it, so he not only stayed in trouble with the Rawsins, but he was always reprimanded by Kalen. She was just ten years old, scrawny and seemed to have more wisdom than he’d had being her senior. He tried telling her that she had to listen to him but she just gave him a roll of her eyes and said, “What for? You’re just gonna get me in trouble.”

Timothy remembered the laugh that had racked his body so hard that he couldn’t stop laughing for days after that. It was then he admitted to himself that he liked this tiny girl with a bold flair for the truth. She was so honest and smart that it had tripped him out then. Now he’d watched her bloom into an oracle for the Lord. When she spoke she brought conviction with her words. She knew her bible, since she was always reading and she had such a bold stance on confrontation. This young lady was not afraid of anyone and she was so sure in her heart of what was right and what was wrong that it blew him away. He owed her a lot of thanks for strengthening him over the years. She’d been his rock, until a year and a half ago, when he decided to get serious about the Lord himself. He never thought that he’d have the fire he had today within a year and a half of being saved. It made him feel good to know that he was serving the Lord with all his might. He couldn’t think of anything better. A brief pick up in the wind, brought something sweet and flowery scented to his nostrils. He felt the speed of his heart beat pick up, the pounding began in his ears. He closed his eyes and exhaled sharply, trying to still the thundering of his pulse. Opening his eyes, he whispered, “Why me Lord?”

Walking in front of them, already on the next block, Tamarah and her best friend Vanessa were walking arm and arm talking discreetly about something. He found his eyes roaming up and down the back of her body. His mind started to go on a trip of it’s own. He felt the tingling that began in his body as he scoped out that beautiful slender chocolate neck of hers, made even more alluring by the bun she wrapped her hair in between the last time he’d spoken to her and him seeing her now. He couldn’t wrap his head around how someone as young as she was could look as beautiful and tempting as she did. Her slender frame was so perfect and contoured in such a way that he couldn’t help but thank God for having made someone as perfect as her. His gaze wondered over wide hips and over her jean clad bottom.

“If one eye causes you to sin, pluck it out. For it’s better to go into heaven with one eye than to have your whole body cast into fire.” Those words caused Timothy’s skin to turn so many shades of red that he looked over at his younger sister. “I wasn’t doing nothing.”

“But you were thinking it.”

He stared over at her. “There is no harm in thinking.”

“The devil is a lie.” She stated, her tone breaking off into laughter. “Don’t make me rebuke you Timothy Rawsin."

Timothy laughed at her, “Alright Ms. Rawsin. I can’t wait til the day you see talk dark and handsome. I would love to see how many scriptures come flooding in your mind then.” He stated.

Kalen laughed, “I hope to God it won’t be anything like how you stare at Tamarah.”

Timothy cleared his throat, his eyes going back to her. “Cut me some slack K.”

“I’ll cut you some slack when you start acting normal. I swear, since you first saw that girl, you have been weird. As a matter of fact, she’s the one girl I notice you will absolutely not allow yourself to get close to. You’d talk to any girl before you would her. By now, Tamarah and her friend were two blocks ahead of them and turning off one of the side streets. “It’s because that girl is the epitome of perfection for me and I try Kalen. I try so hard to obey God, but the more I see her, the more I want her and it’s driving me crazy.”

Kalen laughed, “I suppose it’s a good thing that you only have to see her in school then.”

Timothy cleared his throat, “As of this morning, she and I are assigned partners for a big English assignment that we have.”

“You need me to intervene on your behalf?”

“With some luck, we can just do our separate parts of the project and then put them together the day they are due. Breaking our communication down to a minimum.”

Kalen laughed, “Really? What if God wanted her in your life?”

Timothy laughed. “Not after that party, at-least not according to the gossip grape vine.”

“What do you mean?”

Inhaling sharply, he explained to Kalen what he had heard between Athena Longfort and Draneice O’Neil the afternoon during their lab class. The good thing about not being with the in crowd was that Timothy and Kalen knew what was going on in the school better than most people because they weren’t so wrapped up in the drama. The thing was they’d always said they would never discuss what they heard with anyone, just take it to the alter, in a way, protecting the people at school. However, there was sometimes when they found it so unbelievable that they discussed it themselves and usually thanked God even more that they weren’t involved, but this time, as Timothy spoke, he felt a deep sorrow overtake him. He knew that Tamarah and Tommy could not stand each other. That was known everywhere, and should this tad bit of information get to Vanessa it could destroy their friendship. After he finished telling her what he heard, Kalen glanced up at him, “And you still like this girl?”

Timothy cleared his throat. “It’s not like that with them Kalen, you know that.”

“Yeah, but that’s her best friend. I don’t see how anyone could do that to their bestfriend.”

Timothy shrugged, “They were drinking. You know how people get when they drink.”

Kalen shook her head, “no I don’t. My biological donor used to beat me sober. Never once did she take a drink.” Her tone was a bit hard at this. Timothy placed his arm around her. “Well, I do. My mom made me an expert at it.” He spoke this with no feelings of resentment. He was glad he’d gotten a chance to feel what real love was like.

“Well...even still...she drinks.”

“According to Draneice they had Jello shots at the party that had been made with an alcohol cocktail.”

“Oh. That’s crazy.” Kalen stated. She didn’t even know that people did stuff like that.

“I know.”

“However, Timothy, she is really pretty and I think that if she got saved, she could be a good match for you.”

“But she’s not.”

Kalen shrugged her shoulders, “God can do any and beyond all things, my brother.”“Amen, sister.” Timothy smiled at that. Although he couldn’t see Tamarah stepping foot inside a church to save her life, he did agree with the fact that God could do anything. Even show Tamarah the type of love he offered.

 

 

 

 

Chapter Five:

Vanessa POV:

“I swear Vanessa, that boy is so fine he just makes me want to jump on him and do all kinds of things to him.”

I laughed at imagining this. Ever since Tamarah laid eyes on Timothy the start of their freshman year, she’d been drooling over him. She was hopelessly addicted to a guy she couldn’t have. The only guy she ever talked about was Timothy. Timothy this, Timothy that. She was so obsessed with him that on days like this, I found myself in fits of hysteria at the peculiar dramatics of the situation.

“I’m serious girl, I’d sale my left arm to get a hold of that man. He just seems like a dream to be with. Besides looking like one of those Greek statutes you see in roman history, he is just absolutely the most beautiful, sexiest, and respectful man I’ve ever met. I’ve never even caught him staring at my body the way most guys do you know.”

I laughed, “That’s because he don’t do anything but read the bible. I bet if you guys went out all he would do is tell you you need to get saved and that your soul is going to burn in hell.”

“So he loves Jesus. That’s not necessarily bad because he’s a sweetheart.”

“I bet if you kissed him he’d probably rebuke you.”

Tamarah laughed, “Yeah, I know. He’d probably get baptized or something.”

I laughed, feeling my stomach begin to rumble hard. “ I know girl.”

“But still though, Vanessa, he is so peaceful and I mean just being around him for me is amazing. Even if he never say anything to me.”

“What?” I asked, “What do you mean he never say anything to you?”

“He says hello and goodbye.” Tamarah stated.

“Really?” I inquired, “Why?”

Tamarah sighed, “I don’t know. Maybe he doesn’t like me the way I like him.”

I shook my head, “No, that can’t be it.”

“What do you mean? It can and it probably is.”

“Tamarah, have you seen the way he just stares at you when he see you? I swear it’s almost like he’s in love.”

Tamarah laughed at my words. “Thanks for making me feel better V.”

“No, I’m serious. I’ve seen him staring at you quite a bit lately. I mean, I’m no expert in love but he stares at you the way my dad stares at my mom. Come to think of it, you stare at him the way my mom stares...uhk!!!”

 

I didn’t even want to allow myself to think of the thoughts that go through her head. As much as I couldn’t stand my mom and I wanted her and my dad apart, I couldn’t deny that she loved him. I sometimes felt as if they loved each-other in an abnormal way. I couldn’t imagine my mom and my dad selling each other out the way most of my friends parents did. They would rather kill themselves than be apart from one another. As I pondered on this, I wondered why they were like this. It made no sense to me for them to be as tightly wound together with one another the way they were.

“V- you’re not listening.” Tamarah cut in to my thoughts.

“Yes, I am.” I stated.

“What did I say?” She inquired.

I rambled my brain, coming up empty handed. “um...”

“Yeah, as I said, you weren’t listening.”

I laughed, waving my hands at her, admitting the truth. “Alright, I’m listening now. What were you saying?”

“Never mind. While you were in la-la land, we’ve already made it to your house.”

I sighed, “I’m sorry, T- I just got momentarily distracted thinking about my own parents.”

“oh, ok. Well, I’m going to head on home. I guess I will talk to you later. I feel beat.”

“School will do that to you.”

“Parents just don’t understand how demanding school is. Getting up at the crack of dawn, staying in school all day and then coming home. That’s a full time job.”

I laughed, “Tell me about it. They think they got it hard. At-least they can do what ever they want.”

“That’s not always the best.”

“I would give everything I am for a little bit of breathing room. My mom can be overbearing sometimes. But, I have to go now, because I’m supposed to get in right after school.”

“The Vanessa I know would be going in kicking and screaming.”I laughed. “Normally I would, but my mom was just way too nice this morning. I want to see why she was.”

“Alright then, I’ll talk to you tomorrow?”

 

I watched a smile cover Tamarah’s face. During times like this, I felt a bit inferior to her because when Tamarah smiled, her opal colored eyes sparkled and her smile was so beautiful it stopped everyone in their track. She was a beautiful shade of chocolate that was like a dark maple wood seeped in rain. WWhich contrasted with my popcorn colored skin tone. Where my hair was naturally curly and wiry all over, hers had been permed straight, something- get this- my father refused to allow me to do. He has an obsession with black people’s hair, especially my mother’s, which is weird because although she keeps hers long, it’s a lot more tightly coiled than mine and often times when washed fluff out to a big bush! Literally. I bet you could probably hide a flower plant in her hair, that’s just how thick and long it is. It goes down past her shoulders now. Mine only goes to the very top of my shoulders, because I get it trimmed every two months, at-least he let me do that. Taking in Tamarah’s hair, her eyes looked like slits compared to mine, I would say she definitely looked every bit of her of her Native American and African ancestry. She was stunningly beautiful. Now, I wouldn’t say this about any other girl, but she is my best friend and I can admit that. Anyhow, I wave to Tamarah, telling her goodbye and then go into the house. As soon as I arrive in the house, I am glancing around the kitchen with bulging eyes, confused because I know mom would never leave the house like this. Breakfast dishes were piled up in the sink. The kitchen table still had the condiments from breakfast left on it, even the butter had dripped over the table and was running over now. As I took a step closer to inspect further, I slid a little and had to balance myself to keep from falling. Glancing down, I saw that the butter had melted onto the floor and currently there was a long streak fallowing where I’d slid. I glanced over at lunch dishes that had been left on the table and felt vexed. This is why she was nice to me this morning. She was planning to leave the mess for me to clean up when I got home.

 

Closing my eyes and inhaling sharply, I walked away from the kitchen to take my things through the stairwell that was located off the kitchen to my bedroom upstairs. When I got to my room, I hung my bag on a hook attached to the back of the closet door and placed my coat on a hanger. Glancing around my room, I found solace in the fact that my domain remained comfortable, my things untouched and as I had left them this morning. This was a benefit I could see to being grounded. I actually had my own privacy. Letting out a sigh, I turned to my door and glanced at it. It looked weird. I stared, trying to figure out what the difference was, when finally the difference dawned on me. The door, which usually was closed and had a glittering sign stating for everyone to knock when entering was gone. I laughed at this. “You’ve got to be kidding me.”

 

Going to the door, I grasped for the portion of it that normally allowed me to pull the door close while sliding on its track. There was no smooth groove that my hand could pull it out of. I couldn’t believe this. Out of all the times mom had gotten mad at me, never, ever had she taken my door off. I felt for the wooden panel that locked the door to keep it form coming out. There was none. My hand ran along the the frame of the door. “MOM!!!!” I screamed out in confusion, panic and furry. If there was anything a teenage girl needed, it was her privacy.

~ ~

“Mom, I’m home!” Tamarah yelled as she entered the house, although she knew there would be no answer. There was never an answer, only empty silence. The big two story condo she shared with her mother was more of a home to her than it was to her mother, since her mother couldn’t manage home life from work life.

“I thought you should know that I aced my Chemistry test today!” Tamarah stated to no one in particular. She threw her book bag over in a corner of the immaculate living-room, and flopped down on the mauve colored leather sofa and grabbed the remote. Turning on the 50” flat screen television that was mounted to the wall, she turned it to her favorite show. Full house, a show that had ended in the nineties but still was popular on CBS and NBC. Her favorite character on the show was Kimmy, who was a lot like her in the sense that she constantly lived over the Tanners house. The Tanners were a family that was run by a father, his step brother and best friend, who helped the father take care of his three daughters.

 

Tamarah loved this show because it was so funny and although the family was a little strange, it beat sitting in the house by herself, with nothing to do. She found comfort in having the television on, at-least then it looked like someone was home. As she giggled throughout the episode playing, she found her thoughts drifting to the party Saturday night and to what had occurred between her and Tommy. She hated herself for giving in to what he wanted. She considered herself to be better than that. More than just that though, she hated having to look at Vanessa and speak to her knowing what she’d done with her boyfriend. She already knew that if Vanessa found out, she would cut off their friendship. She would cut off Tommy and for some weird reason, Tamarah had the faintest idea that Tommy would go crazy. What Vanessa saw as love and compassion, Tamarah saw as unadulterated rage.

 

Vanessa would have a stalker on her hands if the truth was ever to be revealed to her. However, even as she thought this, the idea of her friend sharing herself with Tommy upset her because she saw that what he felt for Vanessa was lust. Pure and simple. He just wanted her because he was obsessed with her. She let off a shiver, and got up from her seat as the episode she’d been watching ended and a Crest toothpaste commercial played.

 

As she went into the kitchen to make herself something to eat, she contemplated between telling Vanessa and not telling her, especially since either way she would see the real Tommy emerge. Going to the fridge, she grabbed the small package of chicken she’d set out the night before and took it to the sink.

 

After washing the chicken in clear water, she set the pieces on paper towel and dried them. As she waited for them to dry, she went through a flour container that was part of a set of four jar glasses and then grabbed several seasonings from the cabinet. Afterward, she turned on an aisle on the stove, watching as the pilot lit automatically. She placed a cast iron skillet on the burner and filled it halfway with oil. After using the season in moderation, being sure to coat the entire chicken, she dipped it in flour and returned back to the oil which now was sizzling in the pan. Placing the chicken in the hot oil, she filled the entire pan with the four pieces of chicken she’d coated before turning the burner down to a medium high heat to allow it to cook.

 

While she did that she put on a pan of water for rice. She gathered rice from it’s container. After five minutes, the water was brought to a boil. Taking the measured cup of rice, she emptied it into the pan. The green beans were taken out, fresh from the freezer, she put them in a pan and put half a stick of butter in them and allowed them to saute with minced onion and garlic and with salt and pepper for extra flavor. This completed the ensemble for her meal. Fried chicken, rice and green beans for dinner.

 

She’d been cooking for all but ten minutes when there was a knock at her door. Clearing her throat, she walked out of the sizable kitchen and back through the living room, her feet soft on the cream colored carpeting. Going to the door, she inquired, “Who’s there?”

“It'’s me Tommy.” A voice stated from the other end.

“What are you doing here?” She inquired, curious to know. “How did you find out where I live?” If there was anything she knew, Tamarah had never had Tommy over to her house before. Not by invitation, nor by complementary of Vanessa.

A sigh was heard as a voice cleared. “I need to talk to you.”“How did you get my address?” She asked.

“The phone book.” He replied, Tamarah put a hand on her hip and removed the chain from the door, opening it. Looking him square in the eyes, she said, “My address isn’t listed in the phone book, so how did you get it?”

He sniffed twice and wiped his hand over his nose. Glancing at Tamarah with red bloodshot looking eyes, he said, “I looked it up.”

“”You looked it up? Why? I don’t want you knowing where I live at.”

“I just came over here to make sure that everything was ok between you and me.”

Tamarah’s hand went to her hip and she frowned both brows at him. “Ok between you and me? Tommy, this is bull shit. You know I don'’t like you, so why you come over here like this?”

“I just wanna know if you told Vanessa about what happened with us.”

“Get out.” Tamarah stated, her tone firm. She found him severely irritating and he looked as if something was wrong with him.

Tommy reached out and grabbed Tamarah’s arm, “All I want to know is if you told Vanessa anything, now did you?” His voice became louder on the “did you” part, almost irrational.

Tamarah pulled her arm back, giving her response in the process, “Naw I didn’t tell her, so you can go now.”

He stepped close to her, his eyes darting back and forth aimlessly, as if trying to decide if she was telling the truth. “You ain’t lying are you?”

“Tommy get out my house man, my mom’s going to be here any minute.”

“Let me know you’re being straight up and I’ll leave.”

Tamarah rolled her eyes. “I didn’t, now get out of here. It’ll be worse for you if she come here and you’re here. What is she going to think then?”

Sniffing a third time, he cleared his throat, “Alright, man, but don’t say anything to her.”

“Go.” Tamarah stated, ushering him toward the door. He put his hands up when he reached the door and looked back at her, “I just wanted to know, you know what I’m saying?”

Tamarah slammed the door shut, shivers going up and down her spine. He repulsed her to no avail. Even she had a hard time believing that in that one moment he’d managed to convince her to do what he wanted. She shivered filled with disgust. Inhaling sharply, she locked the chain and bolt and turned back around to get back to the meal she was preparing.

 

 

 

 

 

Chapter Six:

 

“I can’t believe you took my door off mom.”

“Neither can I Vanessa.” My mom stated as I shot a piercing gaze at her that night during dinner. My dad had just come in a half hour ago and was now taking a shower, while we were sitting down, filling our plates. My mother had chosen to make Enchiladas with southern style baked beans and a mixed veggie dish. My brother Craig was cracking up over my current predicament. For a ten year old, he could be pretty annoying at times. “Shut up!” I yelled at him.

Mom glanced over at me, her gaze equaling the fury in my own eyes, “Don’t talk to him like that Vanessa, or else I’m going to add cleaning out the garage to your list of chores.”

“I still can’t believe you took off my door.” I stated.

“I didn’t take off your door.”

“Who took it off then? I need my privacy. I’m fourteen years old and I can’t get dressed without doors, that’s a little bit childish, don’t you think?”

“Not any more childish than that stunt you pulled last night.”

“I apologized for that this morning mom. I thought you forgave me for it.”

“You know what Vanessa, an apology from you really means nothing because the way you are talking to me hasn’t changed, your attitude toward me hasn’t changed.”

“Well mom, I can’t help it if you are a bitch sometimes.”

“Say one more word to your mother like that Vanessa, and I will be washing your mouth out with soap.” My dad stated as he came into the dining room smelling fresh from his shower. “I don’t know what’s gotten into you lately, but it needs to stop or I’m just going to have revert back to the old fashioned ways of doing things.”

“We wouldn’t want that now would we?” I inquired sarcastically.

“Saturday you can spend your entire day cleaning out the garage”, my mom stated.

“Dad!” I whined.

“Vanessa don’t whine about it now. You should have closed your mouth when she asked.”

I folded my arms over my chest, my gaze hot like lava, “So first you take my door, now you giving me the garage to clean after I had to slave over the kitchen this afternoon? Not to mention the large heaps of laundry downstairs in the basement.”

“I am the one who took your door off, Vanessa. When you start acting your age and acting like you have some common sense then you will get that door back, but until then you will not be getting it back. As a matter of fact, it was your mother who convinced me to let you keep your sheets and blankets.”

I pushed my chair out and listened as my fork dropped to the table and clinked as I got ready to storm out. My dad stood up and in a swift movement of his hand, he grabbed my arm, holding it tightly. “Dinner’s not over yet, sit down.”

I stared him in the eyes, my stormy eyes matching his. I said, “You’re hurting me dad.”

“You don’t care about the hurt you cause others with your mouth, but you want to tell me that I’m hurting you?” He snorted at this. “Now...” His tone held some authority in it,“As I said before, sit down, eat your dinner and then you can go sulk, because if you try to leave this table, you will end up embarrassing yourself.” Although his tone was calm, the words were precise enough with anger for my ears to burn with sensitivity. I stared him in the eyes. His gaze was unwavering. After thirty seconds, I started to feel scared for myself. I could see that he meant what he said. Swallowing my nerves, I sat back down. He let go of my arm and went back to his seat that was next to mine and said, “Vanessa you will not behave like this any longer. I will not accept it. You are lucky that your mom has a lot of patience when dealing with you, because I don’t. Mine is running thin and you are going to make me start using my belt.”

Tears welling up in my eyes, I looked over at him. “A belt!” I shrieked, my tone disgusted. “I’m too old for a belt.”

He stared me in the eyes, his a lot more colder than mine and said, “If that’s the truth, you better start acting like you are too old for the belt and show your mom some respect because the way you are acting will not get you any pity in my book.” I watched as his hand smacked the table with force, causing even my little brother to jump in fear. “It’s only making me angrier. She had you, you didn’t have her.”

I got quiet and lowered my gaze to the plate, the tears still rolling down my eyes.

~ ~

The following day at school, as Kalen was passing out fliers to a group of girls who were known to be in the “goth” click, she was tracked down by Tamarah, who’d found out that their church was having a revival that week. “Ey, Kalen, Can I get a flier?” She wanted to know.

“What?” Kalen asked, making sure she had heard correctly. Tamarah, no matter how many times Kalen had passed out fliers that year for events at church, had ever even accepted one and now here she was asking for one.

“You want a flier?”

“Yeah. I do. I’m a student here to you know.”

“Mmm, hmmm, you sure this don’t have anything to do with my brother?” She inquired, her gaze telling that she already knew.

Tamarah denied with a shake of her head, “I need Jesus to Kalen, I’m a sinner myself.” Tamarah knew that she didn’t even really know what a sinner was, but she’d heard enough of the word to know they used it a lot.

Kalen pursed her lips and said, “Now you and I both know that God can just come down here and strike you dead for the hidden lie in those words.”

Tamarah inhaled, holding in her laughter, “I’m not lying, I do want to come, besides, it sure beats sitting at home everyday this week by myself.” She knew that was partially true, since she did hate sitting at home by herself, but her biggest reason was because of Timothy. She just wanted to see how he acted when he was in church. Was he the same way there as he was here, or was he different? That’s why she wanted to go, so she’d be able to see who he was since he wouldn’t come to her. The last time they’d talked to one another, it had been on the phone and even then it was brief to confirm their meeting in the library on Monday.

Kalen glanced at Tamarah and could see what made his brother attracted to her. She was easily one of the prettiest girls in school. She was what they called model material, because she had the tone, the face, the body and everything that men liked, but she also know that the one thing her brother searched for was lacking in her. Inhaling sharply, Kalen cleared her throat. “Tamarah?”

“Yeah?”

“Be honest, are you going to church because of my brother?” She wanted to know.

Tamarah exhaled and leveled seriously with the young lady. Stepping closer to her, she said, “Look, I’m not going to lie, if I didn’t admire your brother so much, I wouldn’t be going to church. So, while a big part of me really does want your brother and when I say I want him, believe me, I want him, I am curious as to why he is the way he is. He is such a beautiful man to me. He’s respectful, caring, kindhearted and loving in a way that I’ve never seen anyone in this school be.

 

I mean that’s sad considering half the school go to the church, but from what I can tell, only you and your brother really believe in what’s being preached there, and I want to see what is it that he believes. Why is it that he looks radiant to me. I look at him and I see something that just looks clean to me and I like that. He looks so peaceful. I’ve never seen a guy that was just cool being by himself and he seem to be that way and I want to know why. I want to know why after all these times people made fun of you guys and said some mean stuff about ya’ll including me, why ya’ll still believe what ya’ll believe and why it makes ya’ll so aggressive about getting the word out. Ok?”

“Well that’s easy, Tamarah. We believe in Jesus.”

Tamarah furrowed her brows in confusion, “it’s that simple huh?”

Kalen smiled, hearing the sarcasm in her voice. “Actually, it is that simple. You do know about Jesus right?”

Tamarah shrugged, “He was a guy that lived a long time ago and he suffered a crucifixion at the hands of pontius pilot.”

“Ok, what else do you know about him?”

“The wikipedia said he died for the sins of the world.” This was very confusing because she didn’t even know she had a sin.

“Yeah, he did. Do you know what that means?”

Tamarah stumbled over herself trying to frame an answer in her mind, but the truth was she couldn’t. She was still stuck on the fact that she had sin. What was sin? “Well, not technically, because I didn’t know I had sin, what ever that is.”

Kalen let out a compassionate sigh. “Sin is to transgress against God.”

“How do you do that?”

Kalen smiled. The more she spoke, the more Kalen was starting to like her. Going over to her, Kalen explained, “When a person lies or steal or have sex without being married or hurt another person, those are examples of what sin is.”

“Well I don’t see what that’s got to do with God.” Tamarah stated, her mind already building up so many questions.

“It has everything to do with God, Tamarah. He created us. So if he say that we sin, then we sin.”

Tamarah said, “Well, what if I didn’t believe in God, would I still be sinning?”

“Sin is sin, whether you acknowledge it or not.”

“Ok...Well, does everybody sin?”

“I’ve never met anyone who didn’t in my life.”

“What’s that suppose to mean?”

“It means that all people have done something wrong in their life.”

“Hmmm...” Tamarah furrowed her brows. Her mind went to her mother, who often spoke like she believed in God. She always told Tamarah that she should thank God for whatever she got, and while Tamarah didn’t see a point to that when the one thing she wanted more was her mother, she just kind of ignored that.

“So, what are we supposed to do about our sin then?”

“Give it to Jesus.”

Tamarah laughed at this. “Give our sins to a dead man? That’s stupid Kalen.” She continued to laugh at this.

“It would be stupid if he were dead.” Kalen stated. This caused Tamarah to stop laughing and she dropped her head and looked at Kalen as if she was crazy. “What do you mean he’s not dead? He died on a cross back in 67 a.d. If that’s not dead, I don’t know what is.”

Kalen was impressed with her retainer of memory. “Well he died physically, but not spiritually. His soul didn’t die.”

Tamarah reached up and scratched her head, wondering what she was talking about. Just then the bell rang, signaling the end of the free period in between.

“Well, I guess, I better go. I have to go to my next class.” Tamarah stated, not caring that she would be late showing up. Her thoughts were going a mile a minute. While part of her said that she should look the other way, there was another part of her that said she should listen to Kalen’s peculiar story. As she walked away, she wondered how a guy named Jesus could take someone else sin if he was a sinner. That was weird. Kalen said that everyone was a sinner so that meant Jesus had been a sinner too right? She tried to think of why a man who was a sinner wanted to take away someone else sin? She wanted to know what Kalen meant by saying he was physically dead but his soul was alive. She didn’t understand how someone could be physically dead and still be a live. It made no sense.

~ ~

Timothy had shut himself off in the library and was reading his bible when he heard someone plop down right in front of him. Still, he continued to read. “What are you reading in there Timothy?” Timothy exhaled and glanced up at the person speaking to him. It was Tamarah. “What?”

“I said what are you reading. I would like to know.” Timothy paused for a second and then found a smile manipulating his features as he thought of her question. Bold. He liked that.

“I’m reading about the prophet Samuel.”

“Who is that?”

He saw the curiosity in her eyes and his brows furrowed. The last thing he expected was for her to ask him about what he was reading and now who, took the icing off the cake. “Well, Samuel was a Hebrew prophet who was ordained to be a servant in the Lord’s temple when he was a baby.”

“Is the Lord the same as Jesus?”

Timothy found this funny.

“What?” She inquired, not sure what was so funny about the question.

After his amusement died down, Timothy shook his head no. “God.”

 

“So what about him serving in God’s temple?” Tamarah asked, her gaze going to him. Her eyes stared at the different loops in his hair and how they went every which way. Now with the light dim in the library it looked more dark brown than the blondish tint that came through during the summer. Her gaze ran over his face as he continued to talk. “Well Samuel’s mother named was Hannah and she couldn’t have any children, so she prayed in the temple day and night for a child and one day she told God that if he blessed her with a child she would give that child back to him by having the child serve in the temple.” As Tamarah listened, her focus shifted in and out from Timothy to the story.

 

His skin tone was a beautiful bronze contrast to her darker tone. As her eyes met his face, she felt her breath catch. His eyes were a beautiful sky blue color that blended well with the narrow forehead, longer middle area and angled at the bottom. His lips were thin but they were still shapely. As she listened to the story and saw the animation as he spoke about Samuel, she couldn’t help but give her own pleasant smile. His tone was soft yet beckoning, as it invited her into another world with the prophet. His belief was evident in the pleasurable tone of his voice. As she sat there and listened, Tamarah knew that no matter what it took she would find a way to make him a permanent fixture in her life. The way he told the story gave her the ability to visualize what he was speaking.

Timothy watched Tamarah’s face as he told her about Samuel. He could see that she enjoyed listening to the words he spoke, that they seemed to be sinking into her brain as he relayed to her one of his favorite characters in the bible.

When he finished, Tamarah smiled at his adaptation of the story of the prophet Samuel. “So, that’s your favorite story, why?”

Timothy sighed, “Because he never was afraid to tell the truth. Samuel was constantly on his p’s and q’s about what God wanted and that’s what I like. He was afraid one time and then after that once, he was always bold about the truth.”

Timothy stared into her face, her beautiful brown eyes were sparkling with curiosity in them. He loved seeing that look. It was as if she was turning more than one wheel in her head about the story. He could see that she was trying to come to her own conclusion. Her long hair was flowing past her shoulders. The silky black strands contrasted beautifully with the deep colors in her skin. The flesh looked smooth and tender. It had not one blemish on it. As he took in the deep angles of her features, he was even more drawn into the specific curve of a low forehead, beautiful high cheekbones and lips that were soft and plump without having to be full. As his eyes strayed a bit lower to her neck, he found himself wondering what it would be like to run his hands across the smooth swan like length of her neck. He imagined he could place several delicate kisses there. It was her clearing her throat that caused him to glance back up into her eyes and feel his heart catch in his throat at the sheen and innocence that was in them. He was simply amazed at how beautiful she was.

“I...um..I...” Tamarah couldn’t clear her mind well enough to allow her speech to proceed forth from her mouth. As a matter of fact, she couldn’t recall what it was she’d been about to say. Those deep blue eyes of his seemed to penetrate her soul and she felt confused. The pounding in her ears had never been so loud before and the moisture on her skin seemed to amplify in measures. As she was caught in those eyes, she felt something question her spirit. It questioned whether or not she could be with him. As she stared into his eyes, she knew undoubtedly that she could. She would go to the moon and back if she had to to be with him. She felt an assured confirmation that this young man, although only seventeen would be the last man for her. She couldn’t see herself in that moment ever being so enthralled with someone the way she was him. Exhaling sharply, she closed her eyes and counted to ten. She didn’t know him, but felt the love for him in her spirit. Opening her eyes a few minutes later, she was shocked to discover that he was gone.

 

Vanessa POF

 

“I can’t believe this crap.” I stated, infuriated. It seemed like my parents were ganging up on me. It seemed like they were cracking a whip and I didn’t like it. I’m not an animal and there was nothing wrong with me. I didn’t need to be told what to do all the time, nor how to behave. I’m not a baby. I snorted at the idea of my dad getting a belt out for me. A fourteen year old girl on the verge of becoming a woman? Belts were so old fashion. So was whipping. I don’t even think they use that word anymore. If my dad thought I was going to buckle through the threat of a belt, he had another thing coming. Slamming my locker shut, I growled in frustration. 

”“Hey, V. What’s up?” A high pitched voice stated, coming up to me. I exhaled sharply. ”“Hey Atty, what’s good?”

”“Nothing much, I wanted to know if you and Tamarah thought about that end of the school year party, I was throwing next month.” 

I slapped my hand against my head, I’d forgotten all about that party. ”

“You know what Atty, I forgot all about that girl, but my parents are acting all stank cause they think I’m not responsible enough, so I am probably not going to be able to go.” 

“Damn girl, don’t they ever let you do anything?” I glanced over at her, a friend of two years, ”

“No, they don’t. It’s that woman. Get rid of her and I’ll be good. My dad would be so busy that he wouldn’t know whether I’m coming or going."”I wish I could find a way to get them separated. It makes me sick looking at how much they drool over each other. You’d think they were long distance lovers or something. I know if they were split up, I’d have my way all the time.” 

“More parties,” Athena laughed with me, her light brown eyes twinkling.

“More freedom.”

“More clothes.”

Vanessa laughed,

“I know that’s right. If my parents were separated, I could get what ever I wanted from them. I could have any and everything II wanted, without them interfering.”

”“Yeah, you’d get twice the gifts during the holidays.””“I know, right.”

”“Yeah. So, do you really want them to split up?” Athena asked me, her tall slender frame looking regal. Athena was every bit the name Athena. She was tall, slender, long blonde hair, brown eyes and a flushed skin tone, that could only be described as peachy. She was a very pretty girl who hid it behind dark framed glasses. She wore a white cotton sundress with a flower pattern on it and flip flops that had a flower charm on them. She was always wearing flowers in her hair or in some sort of design in her jewelry. She loved flowers of all kind. I was drawn to her because of the flowers that she wore. She was like a flower child and she had a very big respect for nature. She seemed to blend in with nature. 

I shrugged, ”“It would be better for my sake. I get tired of being ordered around.” ”“Do you?”

”“Yes, I do. I just want them to give me some type of breathing room.””“Well, I wish there was something I could do to help.”I laughed jokingly, ”“If only you could put a spell on them. That would make things an awful lot easier. Let them back off of me for a while, then I’d have a better day.”

Athena nodded her head, ”“Yeah, if only.” She was already turning thoughts over in her mind. As she smiled silently to herself, she promised to make this journey an event Vanessa would never forget. She reached out to her and ran her hands through her hair, ”“I love your hair, what’d you do to it?” 

I slid my fingers through my hair, ”“Oh this, girl, I just wanted to do something different. Since my dad won’t let me straighten my hair, I figure I may as well get some waves going, you know?”

Athena smiled brightly, seeming to be intrigued, ”“Oh yeah, that’s great. I think it looks really pretty. How long did it take?” 

I shrugged, ”“I just washed it, combed it out and then put it in ponytails and ties in sections down each ponytail. Once getting up this morning, I took them out and this is how they came out.”

”“Beautiful, I should try that.”

”“You should, it’s super easy.” I stated. As we were getting closer to our class, the conversation took a different turn. ”“So, have you talked to Tamarah today?” Her tone inquired.

”“Not, yet, why?” 

”“I was just curious, since ya’ll normally walk in to school together.””“Me either, she text me this morning saying she was going to be late.””“Oh, ok. What about Tommy?” She inquired. I furrowed my brows curious, ”“Why are you asking about them like that Athena?” 

Athena’s cheeks reddened, ”“I just wanted to know how you guys are doing, that’s all. Trust me, I don’t want Tommy.”

I lifted both my brows now. Crossing my hands over my chest, I stared her in the eyes, already heated. ”“You don’t want Tommy? I didn’t ask you if you wanted him, Atty, I just asked what’s with all the questions.”

I watched as her eyes darted everywhere, landing on everything except the one speaking to her. Feeling those flames go higher in my body, I bellowed, ”“What the fuck! I hate that shit! Just spit out what you got to say.” Everyone within my vacinity who heard me turned wide eyes upon me. I felt even more rage, as I stared at them. Athena’s tone came out quick, terrified, ”“I got to go. I’ll talk to you later, V.” She stated, rushing away from me.

 

I walked across the room, enraged. Not really sure as to why I was as angry as I was, but I was so angry, I wanted to just go pound someone in their face. I don’t know why she brought up Tamarah or Tommy but I did know that which ever one of those two I saw first was going to explain to me what the hell has been going on and why it seemed something was going on with them too. Did they truly hate each other as they said they did? Or were they both plotting against me? Plotting to make me look like a fool? As I thought about this, I felt another thing come into place over the anger, something even more poignant. Fear.

 

It turned my insides to mush and I felt tears well up in my eyes. Did Tommy want Tamarah? Did she want him? The thought of the two closest people pulling a Julius Caesar on me hurt. It made me feel as if I could die. Tamarah knew how much I cared for Tommy. She knew how much I wanted to be with him, how much I wanted him for myself. Up until that point, I hadn’t thought of the anguish at the possibility of someone taking him from me. I swallowed, my throat burning as the tears fell. Tamarah was the one girl in the school whom I’d always thought was prettier than me, skinnier than me, more beautiful than I am. 

 

The principle keep your enemies close and your friends closer applied to us. Tamarah and I started out as rivals in second grade. We didn’t like each other but that was only because she and I considered the other competition. She was the only girl who’d won my respect by the fact that when she wanted something she went after it and usually got it. However, I couldn’t stomach the thought of her going after the one I’d wanted. In elementary school Tommy wasn’t all that cute. In fact, he’d been the least attractive boy in class, especially with the fact that he wasn’t from our side of town.

 

However, in middle school he’d transformed into one of the cutest guys in school. I had started out trying to get close to him so that I could date him, but I really ended up liking his character. To some he seemed arrogant, disgusting and dismissive when comparing others to himself, but the guy on the inside that I saw was a person who didn’t let anyone tell him he wasn’t worth nothing, when he was. He was very courageous.

 

I’ve never seen a guy get up and dance to Michael Jackson in the seventh grade talent show the way he had and not only that, but he was the type of guy who kept his feelings to himself. But just because he had never said it didn’t mean he didn’t love me. Most guys like him aren’t the type to say I love you. They usually just show it. Although he hadn’t said it I knew and understood that he loved me. He had too. There was no way we’d be together as long as we have and he not love me. 

 

 

Chapter Seven:

 

Tommy walked into third hour Geometry and took his usual seat next to Vanessa. Leaning into her, he dropped a quick kiss on her lips, giving her a greeting. Vanessa took one look at him and felt her heart drop into her stomach. He was so handsome with his thick curly hair cornrowed into neat braids going toward the back of his head. His dark eyes glistened with desire in them as he looked at her. He was a guy easily able to rival the height of her father at sixteen, but was more broad shoulder and thicker in build than he was. Tommy was made like a line backer, but he was the quarter back on the football team she and twelve other girls cheered for.

 

Because Tommy did not possess the IQ of an average student, he often struggled in subjects like Math, Science, English and History, but excelled in sports. He was the type of guy who could play any sports and usually did, depending on the season. He also was a very popular student. Not only because of his excel in sports, but because he was a very handsome teen. Girls wanted to be with him and boys wanted to be him, especially because he had her. Vanessa never paid much attention, but the boys in their school all found her attractive. Her beauty was often enhanced to the young guys who saw the heart shaped face with green eyes that she sported. There was full lips with a thick curly mass of hair that made the girls envious. Because of her mixed heritage, Tommy knew that other guys had talked about her beautiful shape. She had an hour glass figure that drove most of the guys crazy, but she didn’t notice because he’d always been the apple of her eye. This caused him to smile. Besides having a great body, beautiful sexy eyes and a sweet smile, he loved the fact that she was loyal and that she was dedicated to him. This he’d tested on more than one occasion. He’d set up meetings with other guys on her behalf for a good year now and each time she’d turned them down. These were people he knew but she didn’t. He even sent one on a night before their date. Although he’d arrived earlier than she had to their favorite restaurant, he had sat in the back and watched as she waited for him. His friend had gone up to her, spoken to her, flirted and even made an effort to sit down, but she told him that she was waiting for her boyfriend and that he would not appreciate another man in his seat.

 

When he tried to be more persistent, she put her foot down and told him that she was not interested and if he didn’t move, she would alert the wait staff to his unwanted advances. Tommy had smiled then, because he’d seen not just her faithfulness, but her passion. Her passion was unrivaled in their school. This, he’d known because he could see the many relationships that broke up over many things, most of them silly, but she’d stuck with him. This is why he hated the thought of loosing her. This is why he knew he needed to do what ever it took to keep her, because she was a beautiful woman and even though he’d messed up with her best-friend, he didn’t want anyone else to have her. At-least not until he got to taste and feel and make love to every inch of her body. She was a voluptuous young woman and he wanted to show her just how beautiful she was to him, kiss those beautiful lips. Look into those stunning eyes and hold her the way a man should.

 

As he stared, he felt his body respond to her as it normally did. His heart beat sped up, blood flowed hard through his veins and his body ached in places only she would be able to fill.

As he daydreamed about this, his heart swelled with so many different emotions. He could feel her skin on his mouth. There was nothing more he wanted than Vanessa. This was enough to cause him grief over the fact that he’d slept with Tamarah, even though it wasn’t too bad. He’d never suspected that she would be as inexperienced as she had been, but she was and this had surprised him. Though he’d slept with her, the only part of her he’d seen was the part of her he’d been intimate with. She was definitely beautiful, but when compared to Vanessa, she dimmed. Vanessa was so beautiful it made him breathless. He had always liked her, even in their elementary school years, enamored with her beauty.

 

Vanessa had been the only nice girl to him during their elementary years, which made it easier for him to care for her the way he did. Before he’d become obsessed with claiming her, she’d been such a sweetheart. Since third grade, he’d done what ever he could to make her like him. She’d always been nice to him. He had in sixth grade thought he’d been in love with her, because she was his most prized possession. Although his friendship with her was nothing too close, he found her nice, easy to talk to and he loved making her laugh, just to see that beautiful smile.

 

As he thought of this, he remembered how he’d had problems with her dating another guy in 7th grade. Some guy named Adam. He couldn’t stand hearing her talk about Adam. It felt like she was taking a hammer and nailing at his heart with it. He vowed that year, that during the summer he would reinvent himself. He’d show her how much she meant to him, how much he wanted her. When he came back to school eighth grade year, no one recognized him for who’d he’d been previously. He’d cleaned up well and Vanessa had taken one look at him and it was then he knew that he’d have her. If it was the last thing he did, she’d be his. All of that beauty would be his.

 

As time went on and they began to hang out, he found out that there was more to her than meet the eye. She was so smart that she got bored with the stuff they did in school. She’d also offered to help tutor him in classes if he needed it. It was because of her that his grades had improved too.

Now as he glanced over at her, he felt the thumping get louder in his chest. He now understood the ramifications of what he’d done with Tamarah. With Vanessa, sex wouldn’t just be sex, it would be something more profound and the idea that he’d sabotaged that by being with Tamarah made him scared. He had to find a way to fix this, fix it quickly before it got out.

 

Vanessa had wanted to ask him about Tamarah, but every-time, those dark honey nut colored eyes looked at her, she felt her breath catch in her throat and her stomach fill with butterflies form in the pit of her stomach. She knew that this was a normal stage of hormonal development in teenagers during these years. According to the book she’d read on hormonal development, teenage boys were at their peak for sexual awareness. The part that made her feel shamed was the fact that she had been thinking more and more sexual thoughts about Tommy and her fire was just as lit as his. It was times like these when those beautiful brown eyes lit, that she wanted to just hand herself over to him, but every time she thought that, she could hear her mother’s voice in the back of her head saying don’t bring me home any babies and that boy only wants you for your body. Vanessa sighed, She could only hope that wasn’t true.

 

Tamarah walked around for the rest of the day in a haze. After she’d spoken with Timothy in the library, first about Samuel, and then about their school project, she’d been elated at the idea that he had sat down that long without running from her. She smiled at the thought of progress. It occurred to her that all he needed to know was that he didn’t have to run from her, that she wouldn’t hurt him or even that she was interested in him. As she pulled her bag up on her shoulders, she thought of how he’d taken it when she suggested that they watch and review the movie Philadelphia. He wasn’t a big fan of Tom Hanks. This made her laugh because one of the biggest actors of the decade was Tom Hanks. So, once they did that, he asked her to do American Beauty, she said that sounded way too boring for their test. She suggested Forrest Gump. He said he didn’t like Tom Hanks, so they’d decided to write a list of possible movies and which ever movies they both circled would be the movies they’d think about watching. Tamarah was already compiling a list in her head. As she walked, she didn’t notice that Tommy was coming her way and had she noticed, she would have easily side stepped him. However, when she came to he was close enough to her that there would be no room for escape. She stopped in front of him. He stared at her with angry eyes, “Did you say anything to Vanessa, Tamarah?”

She rolled her eyes. “Why would I do that? I’m trying to forget, not remember.”

“Well then why did she come in class today asking all those questions? The way I see it you got to be telling her something to keep her nosing around.”

Tamarah furrowed her brows, already irritated with him. “I don’t have any way of telling her how much of a damn fool of a man you are. Tommy. I’m not trying to jeopardize our friendship. V’s my best friend. I love her and I don’t want to do that.”

“So, then why is she asking me all them questions?”

Tamarah pulled away from him. “I don’t know dammit and you’re freaking paranoid any way, so you probably imagined the whole damn thing.”

“I aint imagining nothing.” Tommy grabbed her arm in frustration, pulling it to him, “You bitch, tell her and I swear I’ll...”

Tamarah stepped up to him, her eyes seething, her body full of unspeakable rage. “You’ll do what?”

Tommy’s eyes fired black missiles at her, “I’ll do the worst to you than what Mathew Carter did to Angela Balkins on Breaking the day.”

Tamarah lifted her brows, “You’re threatening to do something to me based off a tv show?” She found this so funny she almost laughed. Gritting her teeth together, she whispered, “I wish you would touch me Tommy Whitaker and I swear you won’t be able to lift your pinky finger when I’m done mopping your ass with the floor.”

Tommy pulled his hand back and went to strike her but a hand caught his. He turned his head to the side and to his chagrin, Mr. Copeland, their gym teacher was restraining him. “I would not do that if I were you, you are on public grounds and you will get fined, arrested and end up spending the rest of the day in Juve hall.”

Tommy clenched his jaw, turning his eyes back to Tamarah, “Alright, I’m out.” He pulled his hand away from Mr. Copeland and walked away, sure to bump into Tamarah on his way down the hall. Mr. Copeland stared down at Tamarah, his dark handsome face, concerned. “Are you alright Tamarah?”

“Yes, sir, I’m alright.”

“Mind telling me what that was about?”

She shrugged her shoulders, “Nothing I’d care to get out sir. I have to go though, because the bell is going to ring in four minutes and I still have to go to the top floor.”

Mr. Copeland nodded and cleared his throat. “You be careful, young lady and if you have any more trouble out of him, please come to me.”

She smiled, “Yes, sir.”

Watching her as she left, Mr. Copeland thought that she was going to be a heart breaker when she got older. She was that pretty. Turning away from her direction, Mr. Copeland headed back toward the other door leading out to the school grounds on the west end of the school. The gymnasium had been long abandoned in 2006 in favor of the new construction built in the back, toward the foot ball field and track areas. The building held a boys and girls locker room, the basketball courts and doubled as a pep rally area for the cheer leaders and dance team. The old gymnasium had been set up as the new theater in the school. As he opened the door leading to the outside, his mind went from Tamarah and Tommy and their issue for the upcoming track tryouts beginning this week.

~ ~

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Chapter Eight

 

Vanessa POV:

 

For a brief moment I forgot about Tamarah and Tommy as I entered into my sixth hour Geography class. I was so glad that within a month or two, I’d be finished with this course. It was an awfully boring course, especially since our teacher could speak several languages and she’d often try her hand at preparing activities that had to do with what ever area we were studying at that time. This week we were going to work on Germany and I could only hope that she wouldn’t bring in a song, or dance being native to that culture. I really don’t know anything about them or their language. The only place on the map I was familiar with was Ireland because my family vacationed there every four to five years and my aunt Lasaire often taught me and Craig little snippets of Gaelic. It seemed to be a requirement with all of my cousins. Even my adopted cousin Charmaine had to learn Gaelic, which I thought was funny considering she was only four. I doubt you could teach a four year old Gaelic but hey, if Aunt Lasaire thought she could, who am I to discourage it? As my thoughts began to wander, my eyes settled on Kalen Rawsin.

 

God, that girl really needed to update her wardrobe. I didn’t think there was anything wrong with being a Christian, I mean my mom’s family, except her mother were Baptist through and through and my dad’s family were Catholics, but even they had the sense enough to dress better than to look as if they still were in the old days of long skirts and ugly t-shirts. I knew that a lot of today’s style would not be something Kalen would be impressed with but I saw that she could use an update in her wardrobe.

 

There were tanks and skirts and jeans that she could wear that would cover her. There were even sun dresses she could wear that would look better on her. She had a nice figure, so in my opinion there was no use in drowning it with penny loafers blue jean skirts and faded t-shirts. As my gaze wandered to her hair, I knew my mother would be able to do something with it. She would know exactly what to do to it instead of platting it in her head. I mean she wasn’t ten years old any more. She was in high school. As I thought about this, speculating about upgrading her lack of style, I wondered if all christian girls were suppose to dress like her and if they were, I didn’t think I wanted to join that band wagon.

~ ~

My cool demeanor lasted until the end of the day when Tamarah came up to walk home with me after school. I was then brought back to the reality of my own problems. I spoke to her, asking her how her day went. She told me it was fine, even bragged about Timothy finally opening up to her. “I think this is the start of something beautiful, V.”

“Oh really?”

“Yep.” As I watched that dreamy look cross her face, I thought to myself, although I was attracted to Tommy, I couldn’t imagine feeling the way she did or my mom did for that matter. I suddenly had a fleeting thought of whether or not something was wrong with me. Why did any type of affection openly shown make me feel sick to my stomach. Butterflies would come in and I would feel embarrassed. “V- I don’t think I want to be with anybody ever again in my life.” She sighed wistfully. I furrowed my brows. “How can that be plausible Tamarah when you don’t even go out with Timothy? And you’re fourteen.”

Tamarah glanced over at me, her face glowing like she’d just won a million bucks, “I know, Vanessa. I don’t understand it either but haven’t you ever felt that way about Tommy? Like you just want to curl up next to him and stay there forever?”

I shook my head no. Definitely not. I’ve never loved anyone or even felt remotely close to that way about a guy, unless you count my dad, but he didn’t count. I was supposed to feel that way about him. Then it occurred to me, what if Tamarah was talking about having a dad? What if what she really needed was a father and Timothy would become that fixture? Putting my arm around her shoulder, I said, “Tamarah, I think I know what’s going on.” Tamarah looked at me, that glow in her eyes. “Oh yeah? Enlighten me, sista.”

“I think you are probably looking for someone to attach yourself to because you need a father figure.”

Tamarah raised both brows, “Excuse me?”

“Yeah, I mean you’ve been around my family, but you haven’t really experienced having a dad for yourself so you may just want to have a guy that you can cuddle with and love you know?”

Tamarah shook her head, “No, Vanessa, that’s not it, besides, your dad is my dad, remember.”

I smiled. My dad did take to parenting her a lot. As a matter of fact, he often times gave her advice. Even my mom was more like a mother to her. I guess that sort of made us sisters. “Ok, so then what do you think it is?”

I watched as Tamarah grabbed her stomach, and her face went from a glowing happy look to a painful look.

“Are you alright T?” I asked, stopping next to her. She held her stomach, and shook her head, “no, I’ve been feeling these sharp pains in my stomach.”

“Have you gone to the doctor?” I inquired, my tone concerned.

“No. I thought they would go away by now. I mean, I’ve only had them for a few days now.”“Really? Did you eat something you shouldn’t have?”“I may have. You know mom brought home some take out from the Apple Cart a few days ago.” I groaned. “See I told you to stop eating there. Every time yourc mom bring food home, you end up clenching your stomach. You need to tell her your stomach’s not made for that left over garbage.”

I watched as Tamarah doubled over and the food she’d eaten during lunch came up, splashing on the sidewalk. I groaned, “Uhk, man, tell your momma to stop bringing that mess home. Now you throwing up and stuff.” She stayed there for a minute. I took my bag off my shoulder and unzipped it. Pulling out one of two water bottles I handed it to her. “Here, wash your mouth out.” Tamarah took the water bottle, undid the cap and turned it up. I listened as the water splashed around her mouth. She closed the bottle, and then swished it around her mouth. After she’d spit the water out, she said, “Thanks Vanessa. If this doesn’t clear up by the end of the week, I’m making me a doctor’s appointment.”

I nodded in agreement. “Yeah, that would be best. It could be the flu or something.”

She handed me the bottle and I put it in my bag. I still hadn’t brought up what I wanted to ask her yet. Inhaling sharply, I glanced at her, “Hey Tamarah.”

She turned her gaze upon me. “Yes.”

“There’s nothing going on between you and Tommy is there?”

“No.”

I noticed that she said this too fast. “So like you guys have not fooled around behind my back have you?”

She darted her gaze away from me, looking out at the houses in front of us. “Come on V- I’d never do that to you.” Her gaze came back to me, “You’re my best friend and I’ve never loved anyone as much as I love you. I have to much respect for you to do that. Why are you asking?”

Honestly I didn’t know what had me so curious, but I just couldn’t shake that possibility.

“I don’t know, Athena asked me today if I’d seen you or him and I thought it was weird the way she asked, like she knew something I didn’t.”

Tamarah laughed and I could hear the nervousness in it. “No. nothing is going on between me and Tommy, besides, I’m going after Timothy. He’s who I want.”

I stared at her, her eyes shining at the mention of his name. As I stared, I knew that there was nothing that could take her eyes and heart off of Timothy. Even if I didn’t understand it, Tamarah was in love with him. I don’t know how or why but Tamarah had set her sights and heart on Timothy Rawsin. I almost felt sorry for the poor guy because when Tamarah wanted something, she was ferocious. She would go after him until she got him. With her chasing him, I thought why would she want my man when she’s had her eyes on Timothy since she’d first met him in the beginning of the semester?

~ ~

Field and Track tryouts

 

“I don’t like you.” Tristan Hardoway told Timothy, during the stretch warmups for practice. Timothy flickered his blue gaze over to him. “What am I supposed to do, cry?” Tristan was just as limber as Timothy, tall and wiry with straight hair that went down to his shoulders. He wore a piercing in his eye brow, and lower lip. He also had a tattoo of Marilyn Manson on his right shoulder blade. Although he was naturally a redhead, he’d died his hair black and he dressed in Goth. “Do you know why I don’t like you?” He asked.

Timothy shook his head no, “It’s not like I care. I suppose you can just pick a number and get in line.”

“I don’t like you because you wear formal clothes to school. What junior wear formal clothes to school?”

Timothy furrowed his brows, “Honestly Tristan, I was hoping you’d come up with a better answer, maybe even the truth.”

“It is the truth.”

“No it’s not.”

“So why do I hate you then?”

Timothy sighed, “Since ninth grade I’ve been kicking your butt in track. You’ve been demoted since I was a freshman. I’m lead sprinter and you hate it.”

“I can take you any day, Rawsin.”

Timothy laughed, “Yeah, right.”

“I wonder how Jesus would feel hearing you talk like that, that’s not Christian like.”

“It is for now. If you want to run, shut up talking and let’s do this.” Timothy stated, already irritated with him. Tristan was fast but not as fast as Timothy and one of the things he loved doing was making him eat his dust. Tristan stood up, “Let’s do this.”

Timothy, stood up and assumed the running position. Tristan glanced over at Cory Valdez, “Time us man.” Unknown to them, Coach Copeland had been observing the two boys and had already taken out his stop watch. Cory cleared the past time on his watch and set it to zero. “On your mark,” he said, alerting others on the bleachers. “Get set....”

 

“Go Timothy!” Timothy felt his entire face turn red. A soft smile lit his features. He liked knowing that she was out there. Now he had to win. “Go...” As soon as go was spoken, Timothy shot out like a canon, Tristan hot on his heels. When they hit the hurdles, Timothy jumped them effortlessly and so did Tristan who still lagged behind just enough for Timothy to speed up even more after he hit the black asphalt. He ran so hard and so fast that the wind flew behind him and for a novice, the mile track would have been difficult and even had them breathless, slowing to a still but for him, it was a breeze.

 

He felt like his feet wasn’t touching the ground and he loved that. Once he came to the Finish line, his legs stopped, tingles working it’s way through his body. He hadn’t even broke a sweat for this relay, but he supposed it was due to the fact that the sun was hovering just behind a cloud. He took his towel and wiped his face. Turning, he went back to the bench he’d placed his things on, including his bag and stared at Kalen with a huge smile on his face. Kalen came up to him and handed him a water bottle. “Look at you big bro. Keep that up and you’ll be getting that scholarship this year.”

 

“I know, Tristan just doesn’t understand how much I love running. Every year he makes himself look like a fool trying to race me.”

“You know why he chooses you to pick on, right?”

“Cause I’m the only one he can’t beat.”

“Yep. Maybe you should give him the win, just to get him off your back.”

Timothy laughed sarcastically at this, “Yeah right, like he’d even want my pity. He has to win fair and square. That’s one thing I do like about the guy. He’s not a cheat.” He took a long swig of water from the bottle.

“Yeah, but he look so down after you beat him.”

Timothy laughed, “Girl, stop it with the pity thing ok? It’s amazing that you are as iron clad as you are. I’d think that with all the guys at this school you’d at-least drool after one.”

Kalen shrugged her shoulders, “If there was one worth drooling over, I’m sure I’d be a lost puppy, but fortunately for me, high school boys are just not on my level.”

Timothy shook his head, “You’re only fifteen Kalen, fifteen. What are you going to do with a man?”Kalen shrugged, “Nothing. Christ is my man until he sends someone to fulfill that position.”

Timothy laughed. “I’m glad to hear that. Just make sure when that man comes I meet him first, you got that.”

“Of course.” She leaned in and kissed him on the cheek. Timothy ruffled her hair. Just then the coach called out his name to join the other runners on the track. Timothy, handed her the bottle. “I’ll see you after practice.”

“Alright. Have a good run.”

~ ~

Tamarah stood outside Allen Hall Clinic. She couldn’t hold back anymore. She needed to get the test done today. Her cramps were getting worse and she felt severely bloated. Also, the smell of food continued to make her gag. She knew from reading and researching over the internet that there was a 50 percent chance that she was pregnant. Maybe an even higher percentage, but this she didn’t want to admit.

 

She didn’t want to think of the possibility of being a teen mother. She couldn’t be a teen mother, it just wouldn’t work for her. There was so much she wanted to do and so little that she hadn’t experienced and she definitely didn’t want her first experience to end in such a disastrous note. Pregnancy when it was her first time having sex? To top it all off, it was with a guy she couldn’t stand, so to be pregnant by him would be a blow to her pride. She also thought about Timothy and wondered what he would think of her if he knew she’d slept with her best friend’s boyfriend?

 

The thought made a fear creep up in the pit of her stomach. She didn’t want him to write her off because of that. He’d probably think she was a whore and wonder how could she even call herself a friend of Vanessa’s. He’d probably think she wouldn’t make a good girlfriend. What would her mother think, that she was irresponsible, that she didn’t know how to handle her own or that she couldn’t be left alone any more? It was times like this when Tamarah wished that her relationship with Angela Gray was better than what it was. If she had a mother like Vanessa’s mom, she wouldn’t have ended up this way. In more ways than one, she wished Vanessa’s mother was her mother. At-least then she could be held accountable. Inhaling sharply, she decided that no matter what was going through her mind, she still had to go inside that clinic.

~ ~

“Mrs. Williams, how long have you been having these dizzy spells?” Dr. Mathison inquired before beginning the yearly physical on Denise.

“A good two months now.”

“Two months, huh?”

Denise nodded. “Yes, I think it may be low sugar. I read somewhere that when you get low sugar you can get frequent dizzy spells.”

“That’s true. Frequent dizzy spells, cold hands, cold feet, and you can also become fatigued.”

“I’m having more symptoms than that. I’m actually gaining weight to.” She stated.

“Well, we’ll have a look, just to make sure you’re healthy. Any other symptoms I should know about?”

“ I’ve been feeling bloated for the past six weeks now.”“You’ve been taking the birth control pills regularly haven't you?”“Yes, like clock work. I don’t think I could be pregnant.”

“That shouldn’t be an issue if you have.”

Denise laid back against the white tissue paper, her feet already placed in the stirrups. She watched as Dr. Mathison wrote in his chart and then placed it in one of the mail slots by the door. He went to the sink, washed his hands and wiped them with paper towel. Once his hands were dry, he pulled on a pair of latex gloves and then said, “I remember fourteen years ago when you came to me with these same symptoms and it turned out you were pregnant, and even then you were on birth control.” Denise laughed, “I know. It was very weird. I think that’s a very small percentage and what’s the chance of it happening again? I mean you switched pills. I’ve been taking the same ones since Craig was three. They’ve worked like a charm.”

“That’s good.” The doctor came over and began examining her. Although Denise had done this plenty of times before, it never failed to make her nervous. She didn’t think she’d ever get used to having someone touch her outside her husband, even if it was routine.

When he got to her breasts, he asked if she’d been feeling any tenderness around the aureola. Denise did the gesture for so so. The doctor then pressed gently into her stomach and going lower, he continued to press until she signaled the pain there. When he reached the area where her uterus was, feeling the ballooned exterior, he continued probing until he finished.

 

When the examination was finished, he took his gloves off and threw them in the garbage. Grabbing her chart off the wall, he wrote in it. When he didn’t say anything, Denise felt the panic in her chest. “I’m pregnant aren’t I?” He turned from the document in his hand and said, “I would say a good eight weeks.”

Denise felt her entire body go numb. How did taking birth control make someone pregnant? This she could not fathom.

“Apparently, higher powers have decided to bless you with another child Mrs. Williams.”

Denise pulled her gown around her body and turned to her side before getting up. She should have known that would be the result. After all, five years with no symptoms and then ending up with symptoms was enough for anyone to handle. The question she had was how would her husband handle it. She wasn’t even sure if he wanted any more children. To her it mattered but not too much that she couldn’t adjust. If there was one thing she knew, it was that she loved her husband. Loved him more than to become upset over one more child. “I’m going to schedule you for an ultrasound four weeks from now. I want to take a look at how the baby is developing.”

Denise exhaled as she listened. She wasn’t happy, but nor was she sad, she was somewhere in between.

When the doctor exited the room, Denise got dressed and left the office. So distracted was she by the news that she didn’t even notice Tamarah sitting in one of the leather chairs facing the receptionist desk.

~ ~

 

Chapter Nine:

Three weeks later

 

Vanessa POV:

 

After getting home from cheer leading practice that Friday, I decided to skip my favorite t.v. SShow, in favor of heading up to my room. I really needed some way to sort through all the thoughts that were going through my head. It had been Three weeks since the party, and although it’d only been a measly three weeks, I’d taken to avoiding Tamarah and Tommy like the plague. I couldn’t stomach being around them, knowing the truth, that they so covertly hid; At-least they tried to, but how they never even spit words at each other just confirmed it. The quieter they became, the more convinced I was that something had happened between them. I also was sure that the hatred they shared for one another was even worse than what it had been in the beginning of their meeting. It’s like they so tangibly wanted to kill each other, that the only thing that kept them at bay was what ever secret they shared and the fact that I was there. They’d talk when I wasn’t around and go all quiet when I was there. I swear it was like being around two different people and it was grating my nerves. The thing is, I didn’t know what to do about it. I’m sure they will eventually come out with it. What goes on in the dark always come to light. What I’m not sure of is how I will handle it. The first week I decided not to be around either of them made me want to just slash both of them up real good. I was seeing more than red, more than black. I was seeing the worst thing imaginable. It makes me wonder how long they can keep what they presume as a secret between them and most importantly, who will I be ready to rip apart first.

 

As I went to my room, and searched through the four racks on the wall, I took out a TLC cd. It was fan-mail. When I was in a down and out mood, I found out that they really soothed my nerves. My mother had introduced them to me my sixth grade year of middle school and said that they were a really good group to listen to when you wanted to muster courage.

 

They made the woman feel as if she was in control. She said their lyrics were down to earth but funny too. I’d listened and found that I liked it. The sound very different from the stupid voice overs of pop rock they had on the radio today. As a matter of fact, I found solace in music of the greats. I even ventured down into the fifties and sixties with Frankie Lymon and Peggy Lee. My music collection was a boaster of many, many great artists, because one thing I loved, more than cheer leading was music.

 

The only reason I wasn’t in the Choir at school was because we didn’t have a choir. Choirs, according to my youth were played out. I thought that was too bad because in my opinion, a choir would be epic and awesome. Anyhow, I would sit in my room, make up my own lyrics and create my own music at times.

 

One day I dreamed of being the freshest face in music. I wanted to be famous. During family get togethers they’d demand I get up and pipe something out. Lisette, my cousin from my uncle Elliot and his wife Neema, would get up with me and we’d do our thing together. Lisette was born to perform. Although she’s only eight, that child can sing like it was nobody’s business. Of course we’d sing a few Irish tunes for the old folks, but mostly new stuff because that’s all she knows. I keep thinking to introduce her to some of my collection, but Uncle Elliot and aunt Neema lives in Chicago and that’s a hard thing to do.

 

Flickering my gaze to one of four music racks, I walked up to it and searched through the titles listed in alphabetical order til I reached TLC. The four racks that I had were arranged to fit in the four corners of my room. Little shelves were above them, which is where I kept a self lit candle. I was also into scented candles. Depending on the mood, I’d use one candle at a time. They were not fire lit but they were like an air freshener that breezed through the room by open window. I’d cracked open my window earlier this morning before leaving and now it smelled like cherries.

 

Putting the CD in my stereo, I turned it up loud and danced around as it began to play, singing along with the lyrics. My mom and dad weren’t here and Craig didn’t get home until four thirty, so I had a total two hours to get down with my own beats. And for the time being, I lost myself in the music,

~ ~

Tamarah didn’t know how long she was sitting out by the pier, or how long she’d been at the beach for that matter. All she knew was that she had to find a way to tell Tommy and then tell her best friend the truth, because nine months from now, all would be revealed anyway and the longer she kept it inside the more hostile and angry toward herself and Tommy she became. If she could take back that night she would without a doubt. Exhaling a shaky breath, hoping to expel the tension in her shoulders, she bent her head, tears continuing in excess down her cheeks. She didn’t know what to do or what to say. She just didn’t want Vanessa to think the worse of her, she didn’t want her to hate her or not be her friend. To be honest, Vanessa was the only real friend she had and without her Tamarah didn’t know who she’d communicate with. Without her, Tamarah didn’t know how she’d get through this.

 

Because it was mid May, when you looked out at the sail boats on the harbor they were constantly docking or being loaded. Not only were sailors charting the waters, but so were fishermen, navy men and commercial boaters; even tourists were also docking the harbor and as she looked out into the bay that led to sea, she suddenly wished she was on one of those boats.

“Hi Tamarah.”

A small smile came over her features. Normally she was happy to see him, wanting to, but for the first time in months, she didn’t want to see him. She didn’t want him to see her like this.

“Hi, Timothy.” She whispered, her tone soft. The tears had long since streaked her make up and she was now wiping them from her cheekbones.

“Are you alright?” He inquired, concern in his voice.

“Honestly, Tim, I’m not sure what I’m going to do.”“About what?”

“I feel like such an idiot, like I am the worst best friend in the world.” Tamarah whispered. She hid her face behind her tears.

“You shouldn’t, Tamarah.” He soothed, coming to sit next to her.

“I cheated with my best-friend’s boyfriend.” She confessed.

Timothy reached over, grabbed her chin and tilted it up. “I know.”

She pulled away, embarrassed. “What do you mean you know?”

“Well, let’s just say that these ears hear everything.” He stated, pointing at his own ears.

Furrowing a brow in curiosity, she wondered how he heard it if no one but her knew? At-least no one but her or Tommy, and Tommy wouldn’t tell anyone. So, how did he know? As if reading her thoughts, he answered, “I heard Athena Longford and Draniece O’neal talking about it.”

Tamarah felt her ears burn and a rage began in her stomach. “What-When?” She felt as if she wanted to be swallowed up into a black hole. Draniece, mouth of the south knew? She could only wonder who else knew.

“They were talking about it in our fifth period Trig class.” Timothy stated.

“Oh my God!” She gasped, tears filled with fear began to fall down her cheeks. Nothing could be more embarrassing than that. “Do you know if they told anyone else?” She asked him, her body going through fits of trembles. Timothy reached out and ran a hand over hers. “No, but I think you should tell Vanessa the truth.”

“I know, Tim. I just don’t know how to say it.”

“Just tell her. It’s not like you got pregnant or anything.” As he spoke those words, Tamarah groaned, the beat of her heart accelerating with anxiety. “Did you get pregnant?” He asked.

Tamarah pulled her hand away from him and looked him in the eyes, “What if I did?” Timothy exhaled sharply and said, “Tamarah, sweetheart, only God can help you out of this one now.”

“If you don’t want to talk to me, you aren’t obligated too.”“I know, but I like you.” The words slipped out so freely, that Timothy had no time to think of their impact on her.

“You like me even after knowing I messed around with Vanessa’s boyfriend and got pregnant?”

Timothy exhaled, “You’re not a bad girl Tamarah. You may need Jesus, but you’re pretty decent compared to other girls in that school.”

“Even after what you know?”

Timothy sighed, “Everybody has something they wished they’d never done in life Tamarah.”“Yeah, but everybody don’t get pregnant as a result either. I just know Vanessa’s going to hate me after this. She’ll never speak to me again.”

“Tommy’s not the only guy in school she can get.” He stated, flickering his gaze out toward the harbor, watching as a boat loaded with several people made it’s way out toward open waters.

“Tommy’s the only one she’s ever liked. The night of the party she was going to give herself to him.”

Timothy’s gaze turned back to Tamarah, amazed at how not even smeared makeup could mar her beauty. “So then it could have been her in this situation than you.”

Tamarah shrugged, “Better her than me.” She mumbled.

“Well, don’t feel bad about things now. Pregnancy is just a consequence of not using protection.”

Tamarah gave a flippant expression in her reply, “You don’t say?”

Timothy shook his head, “Yeah, I do say and I’m not joking. Maybe you had no business being there to begin with.” Her heart dropped at his words and she realized that he was chastising her. “I don’t need you to beat me over the head about this Timothy. I know I did wrong and I regret it ok.”

“Regret won’t undo the situation.”

“I know. Geez, if you are going to make me feel like I should be stoned then maybe you should just go on home.”

Timothy sighed. “I’m not trying to stone you. I just want you to know that there are consequences for every decision you make and this is just one of many on your plate at the moment.”

“I know that already.”

“So then do the right thing and tell before you make this situation even worse.”“She’s not going to want to be my friend after this and really I wouldn’t blame her.”“If she did, you would deserve that.”

Tamarah’s head snapped up at him as he stood up. “I know that too.”Timothy sighed and said, “I will see you tomorrow in school. Tonight’s bible study.” Tamarah shrugged her shoulders and glanced out at the open waters.

“You know...”

“Thanks, but no thanks.” She interrupted, “Maybe another time. Now is not the right time. Too much on my mind.”

“Alright, have a good evening.” His footsteps were heard as he walked from the doc to dry land.

~ ~

 

Later that night at dinner, Jordan Williams sat down to an unusually quiet dinner with his family. Vanessa sat stirring uneaten food on her plate while Craig wolfed down anything that came his way. Denise seemed lost in her own thoughts. Exhaling sharply, he opened for discussion, “any body have anything exciting to talk about tonight?”

“not from me.” Craig stated in between mouth fulls.

“Me either.” Vanessa followed, lifting a fork full of food to her mouth.

“Well, I had an interesting day at work today. My secretary Bridgett called in sick today. She think she may have the flu so I told her to take a few days off work and then get back to me. I called in to a temp service and they will be sending someone out first thing in the morning.”

Silence ensued. Jordan glanced around the table at everyone, hoping at least one of his family members would say something, however, all was quiet. “I think that it’s a good thing I’ll be in court the whole time she’s sick, because we will be wrapping up our case over the next few days.” Still no response. Jordan exhaled sharply, “Can someone please tell me what’s going on? Why are you guys so quiet?” Craig pushed out his chair, “Honestly dad, I’m not feeling well. If it’s alright with you, I’m going to excuse myself and go to bed early tonight.” Before Jordan could reply, Craig took his plate to the sink and exited the kitchen. “Me too, I have a lot of homework to do and I want to get it done so I can hit the sack early tonight.” Vanessa copped out, pushing her chair out and fallowing behind her younger brother. With the kitchen half emptied, Jordan turned to face Denise, who just sat staring at him. “Are you alright, or would you like to excuse yourself as well?” Denise sighed, shook her head no and spoke what was on her mind. “I’m pregnant Jordan.”

Jordan narrowed his brows, “What? That can’t be possible I thought you were on birth control?” Denise sighed, “I am.”

Jordan cleared his throat. “And you still got pregnant?”“Yes.”

“hmmm.” Jordan pushed his plate away from him. “How far along are you?”“In a couple of weeks I go for an ultrasound and by then I will know.”“That’s good.” With that, Jordan went silent. Denise sat across from him, her brown eyes unsure. They sat like that for five minutes before Jordan stood up to take his plate to the sink, going toward the door. “Is that all you have to say?” Denise inquired as he crossed the threshold to the door. He paused, “For now, yes. I need a shower and some R and R. I’m tired.”

Denise sighed and glanced down at her plate, suddenly full.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Chapter Ten

 

~ ~

Kalen was stooped down in the refrigerator pulling something out when Timothy came through the door, his satchel over his left shoulder. “Hey, Kalen.”

“What’s up Tim.” She closed the fridge and turned toward the stairwell, biting into a red crisp apple on her way up to her bedroom. Timothy set his bag down on the kitchen table and opened the fridge, rambling through til he found some left over chili from last night’s dinner. His mind was still on the conversation he’d had with Tamarah at the docks a couple of days ago. Although they were halfway through their project, which they’d met today at the library to organize their research, Timothy had sensed her mind was overloaded with thoughts about her secret and what she would do with it. She had been quiet and pretending to be reading over the assignment when really all she was doing was staring at a screen with a few bibliography annotated. Sighing, he thought that she would feel so much better once she did actually tell Vanessa what had happened. He could tell that Vanessa knew something wasn’t right so she’d kept her distance over the past week. He knew without doubt that once Tamarah delivered her news that everything would hit the fan. Not only would he know but by the end of that day everyone else would know too. The amazing thing he wondered was how with Draniece and Athena knowing, no one else knew. Athena was quiet, so it was more likely she wasn’t going to tell but Draniece? What made her decide to not tell? She sure did tell everything else. Inhaling sharply, Timothy furrowed his brows, already hearing the rumors, slander and backlashing she’d receive. He was sorrowed that Tamarah would suffer what she would unintentionally have to go through all because of a decision she made at a party. A decision she’d be conformed to throughout the rest of her high school years. A decision that would ultimately ruin a great friendship between two best friends.

 

~ ~

 

Vanessa POV:

 

Monday Morning

 

I felt something was wrong, knew instinctively upon awakening that today wasn’t going to be a great day for me. Don’t ask how because I’m not sure. I just know ever since I was a little tot, I’d get these feelings of forebodance and with each minute closing in they’d get even stronger until...something would occur. The last time I got this feeling was in Sixth grade when the middle school I attended cafeteria burned down. So needless to say, although this doesn’t happen often, when ever it does happen, it’s usually something horrid and today proved to be no exception as my insides began to hum with excess energy. The dread that encompassed me revealed itself through my expressions at breakfast as I sat sullenly munching on jellied toast and stirring cold eggs around on my plate. They’d been sitting there a good ten minutes now. My father glanced up at me, his gaze mirroring mine, “Are you ok, cupcake?” I felt a tiny flicker of a smile, but even that took a lot as my expression went back to where it was. “I’m ok I suppose.”

“What’s wrong?” He sat down the newspaper he’d been reading and stared at me.

I sighed and stood up, finally deciding it was time to go. “I’m not sure. I just know that today isn’t going to be my best day.”

~ ~

 

As Tamarah approached the school, she stopped, stared at the giant building looming ahead and could hear music playing in the background of her mind; As if she was a woman going to the gallows. Sighing heavily, she opened the big glass doors.

 

There weren’t many students arriving at this time. She’d told Tommy that she wanted to meet him a good thirty minutes early in the library, that way the morning crowd wouldn’t have to hear what she was about to say. Clearing her throat, she walked down the hall to the first door on the right. Once she stepped on the beige carpet, the sound of her heels quieted as she scanned the steel tables for Tommy. He wasn’t anywhere in the front. Pulling her back pack closer to her shoulders, she marched her way past the front book cases and then to the back where a second set of tables were. Tommy sat with his feet crossed at the ankles, both propped up on the table while leaning back in the chair. “Look at what the cat dragged in.”

 

Tamarah cut her eyes at him, stopping in front of him. “I only came to tell you something.” Her tone was serious.

“What?”

“I’m pregnant.”

Tommy let out a hoot of laughter. “You’re pregnant?”

“Yeah.”

He laughed some more. Tamarah stood there with a look of cold anger in her dark charcoal eyes. When he saw her expression, he realized she was serious. Raising a brow at her, he inquired, “What are you going to do about it?”

“You mean we...What are we going to do about it?”

Tommy removed his feet from off the table, put them on the ground and leaned forward, closer to her, “Naw, I mean what are you going to do about it? I ain’t got nothing to do with this.”

Tamarah narrowed her brows, “Ain’t is not a word and you sir do have something to do with it. You’re the only person I’ve ever been with, so this is not just my responsibility but yours too.”

Tommy shook his head, “You expect me to believe that?”

 

Tamarah’s eyes turned stormy, the rage clear in her pupils. “I don’t give a damn what you believe Tommy, but that’s the truth, so don’t try to make me look like some two bit whore when I’m not.”

Tommy laughed again and then sighed. It was then while staring in his features, she realized that the irises were red. Feeling her body tense together, she asked him, “What the hell have you been toking on?”

He laughed again. It was then she realized that talking to him was useless. Turning around she walked out of the library, leaving him giggling in hysteria by himself. As she took a deep sigh, she wondered when did he begin taking drugs? He'd always been a jerk but the red eyes was something new. How did you go from a world class jerk to a drug addict in a matter of weeks? Was this how high school supposed to be?

 

Vanessa POV:

Believe it or not but as I was entering the building to the school, I saw Tamarah come out of the library. She had this pissed off look on her face, the kind she got when she was disgusted with someone or something. Her eyes would squint, her hands clutch at the sides and then her mouth would purse like she’d been eating sour grapes. I went up to her and greeted her. “What’s up T?” I watched as the anger she displayed morphed into a wide eyed nervous look. Narrowing my gaze, I asked, “What’s wrong with you?” She glanced at me, her eyes tearing up. I was taken aback by the sadness in them. She mumbled an excuse me and turned toward the bathroom. My heart went out to her. Following her to the restroom, I pushed the door open. When I got inside, she was going into one of the stalls to get some tissue. I stood there leaned against a wall, waiting for her to exit. When she did, she continued to swipe at her eyes. I listened as she wiped her eyes and then washed her hands with soap and water. “Are you alright Tamarah?” She shook her head no. I felt my heart descend into sympathy. “What’s wrong girl?”

“I...I...” Tears welled up in her eyes again and I listened as she struggled with her words. The same feeling I’d awoken to this morning settled into the pit of my stomach. This was it? This was what that feeling was about? My heart began to pound and I didn’t want to be there. My mind immediately went to Tommy and knew instinctively this was connected. I watched her inhale a deep breath as she attempted to gather her composure. “There is something I need to tell you, but you have to promise me you won’t kill me.”

I crossed my hands over my chest. “I think I already know.”She narrowed her brows. “Yeah?”

“Yeah, I do. You’ve been sleeping with Tommy right?” I felt the trembles began and as I sank against the bathroom wall, I tried desperately to hold myself up.

“No. I haven’t been sleeping with him. However, I did once...”

 

I interrupted her. “The party right?”She raised her brows. “How’d you know?”

 

“It’s genetic.” I stated, feeling a sigh of relief. Relief that she’d atleast spoken the truth after all of these weeks.

 

“You’re not mad?” She inquired, quizzing me.

 

I shrugged, “I spent so much time so sure and so mad before that I think I’ve adjusted to the news.” She squinted her eyes confused. “So...you’re not mad?”

 

I shrugged, “I suppose not.” She exhaled. “I guess that means I can tell you what I need to tell you then.”

 

I raised my brow, my heart skipping and beating so loudly, I was sure it would jump out my chest any minute now. “There’s more?” I whispered, my voice sounding foreign to my own ears.

“I’m pregnant.” She stated quietly. Firecrackers, that’s what I heard in my head, explosive, loud, ringing as anger welled up inside me. As it frothed, another voice whispered, “quiet. Stay quiet.” I turned away and walked out of the bathroom, feeling my heart shatter, my blood pumped profusely and surprisingly enough, there were no words coherent enough to utter as my brain processed the news.

~ ~

Clarissa raised a brow. Pregnant? Tamarah was pregnant and get this...by Tommy Whitaker? An evil laugh roused from deep within her throat as she reached on the side of her bag, pulled out her cellphone and started a text.

~ ~

Tommy enetered the guys’ locker room with his bag on his shoulder. A guy came up and patted him on the back, “Way to go man.” Tommy nodded his head, showing him respect.

“I didn’t know you had it like that, man. Damn, two girls on your jock. I’m impressed.”Tommy narrowed his brows, looking up at Marcus Selton. “What the hell are you talking about?”He just laughed and continued on with what he was doing. As he stopped at his locker, twisting the combination lock he pulled it open and pulled his uniform out and threw his back pack in. “I see you been putting in some over time.” Mathew Lier came over to him and tapped on his locker. The thing opened on its own. “What?”

“Bestfriends at that, dayum...” Tommy flickered his eyes at Mathew. “What the hell are you talking about?”

“Check it out.” Mathew touched the screen on his phone, clicked the messenger and showed Tommy the message in bright purple ink. TAMARAH GREY IS PREGNANT BY TOMMY WHITAKER.”

Tommy’s eyes went so big, he roared, “What the hell...”“So is it true?”

“Hell to the naw, who sent that?” He inquired.

Just then his phone beeped and he pulled it out of his pocket. Opening the messenger, he read the text: Congrats Daddy to be...” This was from one of his drinking buddies. Just then the anger he felt spout up in him nearly toppled over as he grabbed his bag out of the locker and slammed it shut. Eyes so angry with red, he left the locker room and went in search of the only person who could have spoken a word.

~ ~

Tamarah was in the library third hour, going over the list of movies with Timothy.

“Tamarah, we have to pick something. The project is due in two weeks and we still haven’t agreed on anything.”

 

“Why don’t we just each pick a few and watch them instead of trying to agree because we’ll never get done if we keep up this way. We’ve changed this list fifteen times and still can’t find a common ground.”

 

Timothy exhaled, “True.” His eyes scanned the list. Just then the library door opened and before the scene could be processed, Timothy was caught in astonishment as Tamarah was grabbed up from her seat and slung like a rag doll. Timothy stood up and ran to her, stepping in front of her. “No.” He yelled.

 

“Move boy, this ain’t got nothing to do with you.” The anger in Tommy’s voice was so hard, that Timothy himself almost waivered, but all this did was take him back to the days when he had to step in front of his mother’s boyfriends. “Maybe not, but I’m not going to let you hurt her.” He stated, “You need to go somewhere and cool off.”

 

“I’ll just flatten you too.” As Tommy came at him, Timothy grabbed the nearest object and slung it at him, uppercutting him hard. Tommy felt even more rage enter him, while Tamarah along with the rest of the students who’d been sitting in the front at the tables, moved out of the way as Tommy lunged at Timothy again. This time Timothy moved out the way and watched as he connected with a book shelf, knocking it to the ground and falling with it. He stepped aside as Tommy moaned.

 

Campus Security had come by then and were making their way to where he was. They grabbed Tommy and helped him up. His gaze went directly to Tamarah, “I’ll get you bitch, if it’s the last thing I do.” His gaze landed to Timothy. “You may have saved her today, but not forever.” Timothy exhaled sharply and took a step back.

 

His gaze went to Tamarah, “What the hell did you do to piss him off now?” Tamarah stood there shaking. She exhaled a deep breath and put her hand up to her face. She feared that Vanessa has spoken to him. Just then, she heard a phone go off. Looking over at the table she and Timothy had been sitting at she watched as his phone vibrated. He glanced at her and then back at the phone. Walking to the table. He grabed the phone, swiped it a couple of times and seeing the message displayed before his eyes, he gasped and his entire face drained of color. Not a second later, he felt Tamarah come up next to him and before he could do anything, she covered her hand over her mouth, grabbed her books and ran out of the library.

~ ~

 

 

 

Chapter Eleven:

Vanessa POV:

I sat in third hour, trying hard to concentrate, as I attempted to push what Tamarah had told me out of my mind and figuring out what it was I was going to do. The hardest thing I’d ever faced was what to do with my so called boyfriend, who’d betrayed me with my bestfriend. The constant click of my pin tip as it was pushed up and down, offered a distraction that allowed me to be lost in thought, contemplating on the correct way to dispose of a guy who up until this point, never gave an indication that he was being unfaithful. As my attention Mr. Paris My home ec teacher was talking about baking an angel food cake. I took a deep breath, staring at the ingredients lying before me; Eggs, flour and sugar were just a few of the ingredients needed to make my angel food cake. I inhaled sharply and glanced down at the unfinished list of items I’d yet to grab.

 

Taking the list in hand, I went back to the massive fridge that had been placed in the room and gathered the rest of what I needed. I’d been back at my desk, reading over the ingredients list for the last time, when I heard a vibration. Luckily, not many people were paying attention to me, since they’d already started working on their dishes. In a class of fifteen. I was one of three people incharge of desert for the end of the year lunch we were doing today. This was three of four more classes left. Reaching down into my bag, I opened it and pulled it out.

 

Flickering it open, I stared mouth agaped at the text flashing before my eyes. Every color I had in my face naturally drained from embarrassment and I scrolled down to find the message had been practically sent through the whole school. As I stared, my head began to hurt and anger began to well up in my heart. As it did, I heard a knock sound at the door. Mr. Paris left one of the students he was assisting and opened the door. My eyes locked on Mrs. Devonpeele our principal and it took all the strength I could muster to not fall where I stood. “May I speak with Ms. Williams, please?” I dropped my head to pretend I hadn’t heard her. Mr. Paris glanced over at me. “Vanessa Ms. Devonpeele would like to speak with you.” I stood there frozen, not sure of what to do. I could feel the eyes of the other students on me as they waited for me to go to her. “Vanessa.” Mr. Paris called my name a second time. I exhaled and pushed my phone back into my bag, “Bring your bag too.” I pulled the bag across my shoulder and felt my legs turning to jelly as I made my way toward her.

~ ~

“I really didn’t want to pull you out of class, but however, considering the circumstances, I had no choice.” I stared across the desk at Ms. DevonPeele and said nothing. “Is there something you’d like to tell me?”

I turned my face away from her toward the window. I’d been sitting in her office for a good fifteen minutes and she’d already gone over the text with me and spoke about how she condemned such inappropriate content being displayed on school grounds. She already knew who’d sent the message and would deal with the remaining pupils involved after she dealt with me. She also stated given my temper, she wanted to make sure that I wasn’t allowed on school grounds for a couple of days. This I found funny.

 

She only wanted to get the scoop beforehand and what perfect way to do it than to pretend to be looking out for my and everyone else’s best interest. Well, the joke was on her because not only was I not giving out blows. I also wasn’t giving out information. Glancing down at my watch, I said, “My mom’s outside, so, I’m just going to sign out and be on my way.”

 

“Your mother didn’t call the office yet.” She attempted to stop me.

 

I held up my phone. “She just sent me a text.” Just then, her phone rang on her desk and I watched as she answered, “Principal Devonpeele...Yes, she’s here...alright and thank you very much for picking her up...No, just for a couple of days, she can return on Wednesday, when things die down a bit...Yes...I assure you Mrs. Williams. None of this is her fault...Yes, she was just caught in the middle of it. Well, I have to make sure that the students remain safe, especially after what occurred in the library earlier.”

 

I raised a brow, What occurred in the library?

 

“Yes, ma’am, a couple of students got into a fight and they were sent home...Well, ma’am, it was over the text message sent...” I listened silently, but inside I was raging and my heart was racing.

 

Dread filled me as it dawned on me that come tomorrow, everyone who went to this school would know what conversation had taken place between me and Tamarah. The question was, who had over heard the information? I cursed myself for not checking the stalls. How much more embarrassing could this be? The school’s involvement, my parents involvement...” As it dawned on me how many kids had parents, I shook my head in disgust. I’d be the talk of the town by the end of the week. Everyone from here to tim buk tu would know that my boyfriend had gotten my bestfriend pregnant. As I put my face in my hand, I tried not to allow tears to fall from my eyes.

~ ~

Denise was still talking to the principal when Vanessa entered the vehicle. The solemn expression on her face spoke of the suffering she’d had undergone this after noon.

 

“Thank you, Ms. Devonpeele. Have a nice day.” After discharging the conversation, Denise hung up the phone. She put her foot on the break and pulled the gear shift to Drive. Vanessa cleared her throat. “I don’t want to talk about it mom.” Denise nodded her head, “I know. I wouldn’t want to either.” Vanessa crossed her arms over one another, staring straight ahead. The car was silent as they made their way home. Once there, Vanessa opened the door, got out and shut it behind her. Denise, who'’d been getting groceries at the grocery store when Ms. Devonpeele called, popped the trunk and grabbed the few paper bags inside. She closed the trunk and pressed the button on her key ring to ensure all doors were locked.

 

Denise was in the kitchen putting away groceries, thinking about what the principal had told her. Apparently one of the students was pregnant in the school and ironically enough, it had been spread throughout the school and unfortunately, it had something to do with Vanessa. Denise furrowed her brows, Vanessa wasn’t pregnant was she? As this thought entered and she was about to call Vanessa down for a chat, the doorbell rang. She closed the fridge and went to the door.

 

Tamarah stood there staring at her with tears streaking her face. Denise put her hand out and ran it across her face. “Are you alright?” She asked. Tamarah shook her head no. “My life is ruined.” She whispered. Denise placed a gentle hand on her shoulder and allowed her entrance into the house, moving to the side. Closing the door, she asked, “What’s a matter?” Tamarah sniffled, “I...”

 

“Get out.” This caused Denise to glance up at Vanessa who was coming down the stair landing, her face looking as if she wanted to murder Tamarah. Tamarah glanced up, tears streaking her cheek. “I’m sorry Vanessa.”

“I don’t want you around my family, get out.” Vanessa stated, her voice getting louder. Denise raised a brow finally understanding what was going on. “Vanessa, she’s your bestfriend.”

 

Vanessa who’d came from the stairs, stopped in front of them. “Not anymore. She needs to get the hell out of here before I throw her out. Get out!” She yelled. “Vanessa...” Her mother started, her heart dropping at the dark storm growing in her daughter’s gaze, causing her pupils to turn a light grey. Denise knew that look all to well. It would continue to darken to a dark charcoal black if her request wasn’t heeded and after that, there was no telling what would happen. Glancing over at Tamarah, she stated, “You know, perhaps it’s best for you to leave.” Tamarah glanced at Vanessa, her gaze bearing a brokenheart . Turning toward the door, she left. When the door closed, Denise glanced at Vanessa who just stood there, her expression dark. “Vanessa, what’s going on?”

“She’s pregnant by Tommy, that’s what.”

 

Denise blinked, her eyes round and wide, “Come again?”

 

“You heard me.” Vanessa stated, turning toward the stair case.

 

Denise stared at her daughter's retreating figure, "What..." Vanessa shrugged her shoulders as she walked back up to her room.

Denise was so flabbergasted that she didn’t even know how to address the situation. Her mind tried to process the fact that a pregnant fifteen year old just left the house. Her daughter’s best friend was pregnant by her daughter’s boyfriend?

This was unsettling to her, that not only was she pregnant but a young teenager was going to be a mother too, what the hell....

~ ~

 

Chapter Twelve:

 

“Here’s what we have Mr. Marks, just to be clear...You say that on Thursday, March 15, 2019, you got into an argument with your supervising manager Mr. Chad Estalle and he punched you in the nose, correct?” Jordan inquired, already knowing that this was a case that would not be going to far, therefore, he would not give it any attention.

“Yeah, he punched me in the nose after I told him that he could take his job and shove it up his arse.” Jordan nodded. “Any you want to sue him for assault?”

“I do because it’s unconstitutional for a surpervising manager to punch an employee.”Jordan lifted a brow. “Unconstitutional?”

“Yes. I believe he should get what’s coming to him.”“Mr. Marks, everyone within eye witness view stated that you punched him first, that you drew the first lick.”

“I did not. He the one who did me wrong, telling me I’m terminated without cause.”Jordan sighed, “Mr. Marks, at the beginning of your employment you signed a document stating that he could fire you without cause.”

“Mr. Williams, you don’t sound like you want to help me.”Jordan stared at the younger man, shaking his head, “I refuse to prosecute a case where you the instigator.”

“I didn’t instigate anything. You know what, I know what this is about, you don’t want to take me on because...” Jordan held up his hand, interrupting him, “Wait a minute, Marks, color has nothing to do with this. You simply don’t have a case. Any judge would throw this out. In front of ten witnesses, which can all be verifiied, you threw the first punch and therefore the other party had a right to defend himself.”

“Those witnesses are lying.”

Jordan exhaled, “I see. Mr. Marks, I’d appreciate it if you could take your case else where, I refuse to participate.”

Mr. Marks shrugged his shoulder, “You’re not even the best, I just came to you because you were more reasonably priced. I need the best on my behalf and apparently you’re not.”

“Have a nice day Mr. Marks. Thank you for stopping in.” Jordan ignored his statement. While he wasn’t the best yet, he was surely working his way there, making a name for himself. He’d actually had his own firm for seven years now and there was nothing better than setting your own terms. Those terms meant not having to take on any case he didn’t want too and this particular case, he definitely didn’t want. They guy had actually swung on his boss, so as a method of protection had been punched in the eye and told to get out of the building before he’d be escorted out by the company.

 

As a sense of his own precaution, Jordan dialed Bridgett his secretary number and asked her if Mr. Marks had made it her way. She informed him that he had, but also said that his one oclock appointment, Gina Harrelson was here. He told her to send her back. He’d gone over Gina Harrelson’s file and and saw that she wanted to pursue a sexual harrassment case. He’d gotten her initial form and asked her to come into the office, so that he could get more information on what had been happening since she started working at INK Palace, a company that offered services for up and coming writers.

 

Although the establishment was in Richmond, she said that she’d wanted to go outside the Richmond area to find a legal firm that wasn’t in INK Palace’s pocket. What made Jordan curious was the fact that of all the law firms more reputable, she’d actually chosen one that had been open for a short amount of time. He was sure there had been other firms in the area, but had chosen, Eye Corp as her choice. Jordan pushed the intercom button on his desk, speaking to Bridgett, “Will you please send Gina Harrelson back, please?”

 

“She’s on her way now, Mr. Williams.” She stated. Jordan glanced down at his notes, going over them once again and waited for her entry. When he heard a knock at the door way, he stood up, placed his pen on the desk and prepared to greet the woman in the door. He paused in his steps, his heart doing a little dip and suddenly little electrons coursed through his body. His eyes stared in awe at the young lady before him. Hair as red as fire, deep crystal like blue eyes and full cherry colored red lips. His gaze scanned over her perfectly formed face, high cheekbones, long slender neck, and a sleek form to match. As his eyes roamed further, they caressed beautifully built sleek shoulders that were accented by the short sleeve tunic she wore. His pulse sped up as his eyes roamed further.

 

A clearing of her throat, brought his head back to her face. His eyes met hers with a deep smoky look, even he was unaware of. As she stared at him, her lips pressed together and a soft tint rose to color her cheeks. He darted his eyes across the room, trying to find something to bring his mind away from her beauty. Unsuccessful, he exhaled sharply and stated, his tone firm, “Hello, I’m Jordan Williams.” She held out a hand to shake his. He took a step back. Something in the back of his mind told him not to shake her hand. “Hello,” She stated, her tone sultry. “I’m Gina Harrelson, nice to meet you.”

 

He nodded, going to his desk, “Like wise. I see that you...” His voice trailed off as his gaze went from the paper work to her. She stared back at him, her blue eyes innocent. When he didn’t speak for a minute, she said, “I came here because I wanted to sue the company I work for.” He nodded, his mind clicking into gear, “Right, um...you say that you’ve suffered several occassions of sexual harrassment from a Mr. Olier Devode” She shook her head, “Yes, ever since I started working there two years ago.”

 

Jordan furrowed his brows, “Two years ago? I could have sworn your paper work was contrary. It said one year ago you started with the company.”

 

She shrugged, “Well, hey, it seems like longer than that,” This statement Jordan filed in the back of his mind. “I usually have a cigarette break, do you mind if I do so, right now?”

 

Jordan objected, “Actually smoking on the premises is prohibited.” She glanced over at him, dropping a dazzling smile, “I will only take a puff. As much as I hate these things, they’re my only source of relief.” Jordan nodded. “I undestand that ma’am, but it’s against policy to smoke in this building.” She nodded, “Alright,” and put the cigarette back in her purse.”

 

“So, did all of this start with Mr. Olier?”

 

“Yes, this all started with Mr. Olier.”

 

“Would you mind telling me when?”

 

“I started working there in December of 2017. A good week I’d been working there when he started complementing me on my looks, then that escalated to my wardrobe and then that escalated to my physical body.”

 

Jordan waited for her to continue but when she didn’t, he exhaled sharply. “Did he ever lay a finger on you? Touch you in any sexual way? Make lewd comments?” Gina shrugged, “Always, he’d lean in suggestively to me and make all sorts of off handed comments...”

 

“What kind of comments would you consider off handed?”“You know, the inappropriate kind.”

 

“Could you be more specific?”

 

Gina’s brows creased in a morbid frown, “ I have to be specific?”“Every question I’m asking you will be asked while you’re bringing the case before the judge.”“Oh...well, he did used to say a girl like me could get anything I want from someone like him, if I chose to use the right assets.”

 

“Did he ever comment personally on what those assets entailed?”Gina glanced at him, her eyebrows rising, “Do you not believe what I’m telling you?” Jordan answered, “It’s not that I do or don’t believe you, it’s that you haven’t given me one ounce of information to go off of.”

 

“He used to rub himself against me whenever I stepped into his office.”Jordan wrote this down on his note pad. “How often did it happen?”“at least six times in the past year.”

 

“Six times without your approval?”

 

“Yes.”

 

“Did you ever complain to the higher ups?”

 

“Yes.”

 

“And?...”

 

“And nothing happened.”

 

“Who did you complain to?”

 

“The store manager and then the director, all the way up practically.”“I see. Did you file a sexual harassment complaint?”“I did.”

 

“And no one acknowledged it?”

 

“No.”

 

Why didn’t you quit if no one listened to your complaints?”

 

“I couldn’t, I needed the money and honestly, it’s been the only job I’ve been able to access this year alone.”

 

“Do you have a copy of the harassment report?”

 

“Yes.”

 

Jordan nodded his head, “Will you bring the report in with you next time you come to my office?”“Sure.”

 

“What’s your position at Ink Palace ?”

 

“Sales associate.”

 

Jordan wrote this down as she continued to talk. “You see Mr. Williams, it’s not just that I have myself to support, but I also take care of my mother and nephew on this salaried position.”

 

“As a sales associate, you get Salary?”

 

Gina nodded, “It’s one of the things that make Ink Palace unique.”Jordan nodded his head understanding. “Ok. How much do you pull in a year?”

 

“Is this about the pay because over the phone you said that the first consultation was free and you wouldn’t charge a retainer unless the case was accepted.”

 

Jordan smiled, “And I meant it. I won’t charge you the retainer unless the judge decides to hear your case, you have my word on it.”

“Does that include other fees and taxes?”

 

“The only thing you will worry about is paying for the courts to process the documents, that’s all. I won’t receive a penny.”

 

“Do you do this with all your clients?”

 

“This is actually three weeks into a two month promotional, to promote better clientale.”“Do you have any big shots?”

 

“I don’t discuss any of my clients’ profiles.”

 

“I guess that’s a no then.”

 

Jordan laughed, “So anyhow, now that we’ve established why you’ve continued to work for Ink Palace, I need to know who else has involvement with what’s been occurring within the office.” Jordan listened as she ticked off name after name and could only imagine what lay ahead for him pertaining to this case.

~ ~

 

I feel like I’m going to loose my mind...

Seeing you with her has made me blind...

The rage so swift...like a knawing death trap waiting to be set free...

I would expect that from some one else, not you two...seeing how you both hated equally.

Vanessa wrote the chorus to her new song first, so that when she wrote the lyrics she’d be able to write them around it. She was so angry, she had to push herself to focus on school work and everything else, except writing. Her music writing was her solace at this moment. As she glanced down at the lyrics, she could feel the beat drumb through her heart and pull itself up through her vocal chords in her throat, causing her mouth to open and a beautiful high pitch soprano come out, giving the lyrics life. The pain in her heart as she spoke them was strong and showed itself in her voice. More words seemed to come as she lost herself in the smooth melody that seemed to be developing.

I thought you were right for me because you made it seem so...I thought we’d be like bonnie and clyde except on an alusive ride. No where to go, nothing to do, now that you have made me the fool. My heart I gave, my love burned fierce, the ashes won’t complete the depth of my tears...I love you a lot, the pain is so real...I don’t think you understand how this make me feel....

 

She went back to the chorus, belting out the soulful sound from her stomach.

 

I feel like I’m going to loose my mind

Seeing you with her has made me blind

The rage so swift...like a knawing trap waiting to be set free...

I would expect that from someone else, not you two seeing how you both hated equally...

 

A repeat of the chorus two more times rounded out the song and Vanessa could feel the last verse flow through her body soul and mind as tears welled up in her eyes, causing her heart to break...

I gave myself to you, heart body and soul...anything you spoke would have been gold. Waiting and hoping for the time to be right, the perfection to shine through, glad through and through I was with you. I shared my innermost thoughts, the sweet longing in my heart...All of those kisses, seemingly deep, did more than sweep me off my feet. I loved you a lot, something fierce, even imaged seeing us through the years...I wasn’t sure we’d make it but hoped we could....That’s all gone now, down the drain...

~ ~

 

“So, let me get this straight...You jumped up in defense of a girl at school and ended up in a fight?”

Timothy shook his head yes. “Well, she wasn’t just any girl.”His mother, who’d been making lunch for both of them sat his sandwich in front of him. Her eyes going to his. “I see...not just any girl?”

Timothy laughed at this, “Yes, mom, that girl is Tamarah Grey.”Carol Rawsin’s eye brows rose in alarm, “Oh, that girl.”Timothy furrowed, “What’s that supposed to mean, mom?”“Nothing, it’s just I received a text message...”

“Oh my God. How did you get the message, who,,,”

“I don’t know, some girl sent it to Janine and she sent it to me.” Janine Wilson was his mother’s bestfriend. “Kelly didn’t send it to her?” Timothy asked speaking of Janine’s seventeen year old daughter.

“No. She didn’t even go to school today. She was out sick.”“Oh, well you know I never did like it when guys hit girls, so I thought it would be beneficial to step in.”

“uh huh, listen, Tim, don’t think I don’t notice how you look at that girl.” Timothy flickered his gaze over to his mother. He’d never heard that tone in her voice before. A strong dislike was wrapped around those words. “She’s not a bad girl mom.”

 

"Of course not, she just happened to get pregnant miraculously.”

 

“Mom, Tamarah’s not fast ok. There’s more to her than just being pregnant.”

 

“Timothy, that’s the kind of girl that will eat you up and spit you out. A man eater.”

 

“And what proof of this do you have?”

 

“Pregnant at fifteen isn’t enough?”

 

Timothy shook his head, his answer blunt. “No.”

 

Carol looked at him, her brows furrowed, “You have feelings for this girl Timothy?”

Timothy didn't respond.

 

“And don’t lie to me too, I know you to well.”

 

Timothy sighed and gulped down the glass of milk she’d placed in front of him. Glancing up to meet her gaze, he nodded, “And since you do then I don’t need to even answer that question.”

 

“hmmm.”

 

Timothy laughed at her expression. “Ok, so what if I like her.”

 

Carol sighed, “She’s not even saved.”

 

Timothy nodded his head, “I noticed that mom. I may like her but that doesn’t mean It’ll advance any further than that. You know that I have my priorities in order. God’s first on my list. Not a skirt.”

 

“That’s good to hear.” Carol stated, her eyes still on Timothy. Although she didn’t say, she knew that the old guy still lurked in there somewhere and that was the Timothy she worried about.

 

 

~ ~

“I need to talk to you, mom.”

“Now’s not a good time, baby. I have to get ready for work.”

“It won’t take too long. I need to tell you what’s been going on with me lately.”

“Tamarah, sweetheart...”

“Mom, please...”

“Tamarah, I have a five o’clock appointment and this home is worth a lot more than my last, so if I get this sold, I not only get a bigger percentage, but I also get a nice fat comission from the sale, now please...”

“Mom, I’m pregnant.” Tamarah blurted out, staring up at her mother with her brown eyes flushed with tears. Angela Grey gaze first shocked, glanced down at her daughter, kissed her on the forehead and then stated they’d talk about it when she came home. Tamarah stared at her, her heart breaking, “Mom, didn’t you just hear what I said?”

Angela nodded, turned toward her press ons and cleared her throat, her pink cherry lipstick the perfect shade for her medium toned skin and answered, “I hear you and we will deal with this a little later.” With that, she grabbed her keys off the counter top and rushed toward the door. “I promise not to be long and I will sit down and have a talk with you then. It’s not the end of the world, Tamarah. Lots of girls get pregnant at your age.” Tamarah’s eyes widened in surprise. How could her own mother say anything like that? She watched as her mother’s footsteps went past the hall way and to the front door.

 

Turning the brass knob, she quickly exited it. She sat there for a minute staring, wondering, how and why did she end up with a woman who just didn’t care or even get it. Reaching up and whiping her hands over her eyes, she went to the door and as she was about to push it close, the door pushed open and she felt the sting without having seeing the hit. Tamarah’s eyes stung as she glanced up into the face of Tommy whitaker. His rage so raw and heated, he came toward her again,

 

Tamarah cried out loud but instead of running away, she ran toward him, shouting a stream of curse words. She screamed, “I hate you, I hate you!, as her fists wailed into his chest, hitting him as hard as she could. He yelled, “Shut the hell up.” and grabbed her by the throat. Although he squeezed and it hurt, Tamarah used every ounce of her strength to pull her foot up to his groin area and connect with it. She balled up her fist and hit him so hard in the eye, he stumbled backward, completely loosing the grip he’d already loosened from the previous hit and let go of her kneck.

 

Tamarah ran at him again and kicked him hard in the stomach, he gasped, “You bitch, I’m going to kill you.” His hand grasped a fist full of her hair and pulled her toward him. She screamed and yelled as he wrapped his hand around her throat. Her hands went to his eyes as she tried to pry them out of his skull. As far as she was concerned, her life was over any way and it didn't matter, nothing mattered except hurting him the same way she hurt and even if it took her last breath, she would make him pay for this. As she began to caugh from lack of air, she faught to draw in breath.

 

Tears welled up in her eyes and she could feel everything begin to fade as the fight in her began to fade until eventually, there was none left and she went limp. Tommy glanced down at her, his eyes hard and full of hatred. He actually felt no fear, no remorse, not even sympathy for the young girl that lay still beneath him. Staring down at her, making sure she wasn’t about to move, he nodded satisfactorily and turned to exit out of the apartment. As he did, sirens were heard in the distance. Someone had called the police. He smirked and hoped they’d brought a body bag because she was going to need one.

 

~ ~

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Chapter Thirteen:

~ ~

Tamarah startled awake, beads of perspiration falling down her forehead and the temples of her face. With a shaky hand, she reached up and wiped away the sweat. Putting her hand up to her face, she let out a shaky breath and closed her eyes tightly, trying hard to forget the nightmare she’d had. Pushing her hair away from her face, she let out a deep sigh and felt a fear encompass her heart. She didn’t want to die, wasn’t ready to die. Glancing around, she noticed that she was on the couch and light shadows were shrouding the windows in the condo she shared with her mother. She remembered her mother telling her they’d talk after she got home, but anything outside of that alluded her. Her first idea was to call Vanessa and tell her about it but then she remembered that Vanessa was a part of nightmare. She thought of other possibilities and the only person she knew who’d talked to her was Tim. She’d never used his phone number for anything other than the school project. Sighing, she got up, went to her book bag and pulled out her project folder. Opening the flap, she stared at the name and number written on top of the page. Running her hand over it, she exhaled a deep breath and stared at it.

~ ~

Timothy jogged across Deppend road to the country road Altman and picked up his pace as he continued out. Altman went on for a good stretch of three miles before hitting Mariner boulevard and turning down another long winding road that led up a good mile to a small grocery store which would be where he’d stop to catch his breath and refill on the water canteen he had. Drenched in sweat by the time he hit Mariner, he swiped his brow and took a long swig on the canteen and then set out to a walk, allowing the water to filter through his body. He’d walked halfway down Mariner by the time he felt his heart rate slow down to normal. He calculated his pulse, took a pen and piece of paper out of his bag and wrote down the number. He then determined his Target heart rate before continuing on through walking til he got to the store. When he arrived there he was not surprised to see his mother’s best-friend Janine behind the cash register. “Hi Janine.” “Hey, Tim. How’s it going?”

“Alright,” He stated, heading to the back of the store for a water.

“Enjoying your run on this Spring evening?”

“Yes. It’s been nice thus far.”

“How’s your mom?”

“Good, she’s...” Just then, Timothy'’s phone went off and he went through his bag to come up with it before it stopped ringing. He found it underneath his stop watch and canteen. Swiping the screen, he answered. “Hello?”

“Hi, Tim.” Immediately his heart plummeted and began beating furiously, “Hi Tamarah.”“I was calling because there was no one else to talk to you know, so I thought since I had your number...” The words rushed out of her mouth.

 

Timothy found himself smiling, “No prob. What’s up?”

 

“Well, I had a bad dream and I needed someone to talk to about it.”

 

“Oh, I just finished a run...”

 

“I..well, I can call back another time...” She interrupted.

“No..no, it’s cool. I um...just...” Timothy frowned as he realized he couldn’t remember what he'’d been about to say. He’d suddenly forgot his train of thought.

“You know...I’ll just...” with that she hung up. Timothy pulled the phone away from his face, hitting it against the counter. “Uhh, this is so frustrating.” His cheeks were so red they spoke of the embarassment.

 

“That was the strangest conversation I’ve ever heard.” Janine stated, watching Timothy with pecuilar eyes. “She just hung up on me.” Timothy stated, looking up at Janine. “I can’t believe she hung up on me.”

 

“Who?”

 

Timothy was about to say her name but stopped himself, immediately knowing that she’d know who Tamarah was. Going to the freezer, he pulled out a water, pulled a dollar from his pocket and slapped it on the counter, “I’ll talk to you later Janine.” Timothy ran out of the store.

~ ~

 

Tamarah laid a frustrated hand over her forehead, not knowing what to do. She’d needed someone to talk to and for some reason had gotten the bright idea to call him, but that obviously back fired. Inhaling sharply, she didn’t know why she was acting goofy. Standing up, she decided to go have a shower before she’d began dinner for herself. She’d plan to make beef hot dogs and black beans over a bed of rice.

After a shower she went downstairs, pulled out the ingredients and began the small dinner she was going to prepare. Just as she’d gotten the rice into a pot to boil, the doorbell rang. Going to the door, she was about to pull it open but stopped, remembering her nightmare. “Tamarah, it’s Timothy.” Tamarah glanced down at herself, relieved that she atleast had a robe on over her pajamas. Exhaling sharply, she unlocked the door and opened it. “Hi.” He stated.

 

Tamarah smiled, “Hi.”

“You hung up on me.”

 

She nodded her head, moving away from the door, allowing him entrance, “I know.”

 

“Why?” He inquired, stepping into the house. Tamarah stared at him, seeing that he was still in his exercise clothing. Sweat drenched his hair as it matted his forehead as well as his body and clothing. “You came over here straight from your run?”

 

Timothy sat his bag down beside the couch, “Yes.”

 

“Why?” Tamarah inquired confused.

 

Timothy didn’t answer her question, instead asked his own, “Do you have a towel?”Tamarah sighed, “I can do better than that.

 

"When my cousin Caleb comes in during the summer to visit, he usually has clothes in the spare bedroom, I can get you a pair.” With that, she ran through the hallway and through the kitchen area and up the stairs. Timothy took this time to look around the apartment. He noticed the kitchen done up in black and white on the East end of the wall. The appliances looked new with a nook inside the kitchen. Turning toward the living area, he noticed a fifty inch flat screen bolted to the west end wall, and beneath it a fire place. The living room was spacious as it held a white sectional sofa with end tables on either side and a coffee table with a throw rug underneath a blue and white speckled flooring, and yet still had enough space to walk through. The stairwell curved upward to where you were able to see the second floor with no problem, since there were no walls to block your view. There were several doors, dividing the areas. There was something homey, yet lonely about the place. That’s when he realizeed that the only sound in the house that could be heard was Tamarah’s. He slapped his forehead in irritation.

 

He hadn’t even bothered to ask about her parents. “I hope these fit well. You can shower in the downstairs bathroom.” Tamarah made her way downstairs to him. When she got to him and handed him the clothes, he said, “I didn’t know you were here by yourself.”

 

Tamarah smiled, “I usually am.”

 

“I’m sorry for just intruding like this.” His eyes connected with hers. Tamarah shrugged, “Trust me, it’s better than always being alone. The bathroom is right there.” She pointed behind his shoulder. That’s when Timothy noticed a door next to the television. “Ok, thanks.” Turning, he went to the bathroom.

~ ~

 

Tamarah glanced down at her robe and turned off the pot of rice when it was close to being done. She didn’t want to let the rice continue cooking and get soft, so before it completed the process, she turned it off. Taking this time, she ran upstairs, dressed and came back down wearing a red silk blouse and a pair of capri shorts that stretched around the waist. Going to the cabinet, she pulled out two plates and cups. She pulled out utensils from the drawers. As she was setting the table, Timothy came out of the bathroom, wearing the clothes she’d given him. Glancing up, she felt her heart began hammering. Her gaze was caught up in awe at the sky blue eyes that stood out against a golden halo of wet and wavy hair that was combed away from his forehead, giving a full view of his features. As her eyes locked with his, she felt pricks flood her body, giving off a lot of heat. He broke contact with her, “I didn't know you could cook.” She finally took her eyes away from him, her gaze having traveled the length of his muscular frame and glanced down at what she’d been momentarily distracted from. “Yeah, a light dinner, consisting of seasoned sliced hotdogs and black beans over a bed of rice.” She spooned two heaping fulls of rice onto her plate and then onto his, followed by the beans and hot dog combo. Taking the last skillet back to the stove, she went and sat down, grasping her fork in hand. “When you spend a lot of time at home by yourself, you have a tendency to learn a lot on your own.” Timothy nodded, reached across the table and grabbed Tamarah’s hand. Tamarah jumped, not used to the contact. Timothy sighed, “Grace, Tamarah. We have to thank God for our food.”

 

“Oh.” Tamarah put her hand back in his. She listened as he gave thanks for their food. When he finished, her hand stayed put.

 

He slowly pulled his away, “So are you always by yourself?” Taking ahold of the fork set beside his plate, he mixed his food together. “Yeah for the most part.”

 

“You know before I met the Rawsins, I always stayed at home by myself.”Tamarah sighed, “Yeah, it kind of sucks. All I do is cook, clean and sleep. I also used to spend a lot of time with Vanessa’s family.”

 

Timothy sighed, bringing a spoon full of food to his mouth. “Speaking of her, have you guys spoken?”

 

“No. I don’t think she’ll ever speak to me again, Tim.”

 

“How long have you two known each other?”

 

Tamarah shrugged, “since second grade.”

 

“Oh yeah?”

 

“Yeah.”

 

“I don’t think she would give that up for a guy. She doesn’t seem like she’s all that emotional anyway.”

 

“Vanessa is very emotional with a side of outspokenness and me me me.”

 

“You mean selfishness?”

 

“Yes, deeply so. Vanessa is smart and she is vocal. Although she lacks the empathy she needs for other people. She’s...an acquired taste.”

 

Timothy’s eyes went big, “Wow, that doesn’t sound too likeable on her part. Are you sure you’re her best-friend?”

 

Tamarah sighed, “Only a friend can say that with out fear of being beat up. Vanessa is loyal too you know, too a fault. I tried to tell her Tommy changed when we entered high school but she wouldn’t listen.”

 

“So you decided to show her, right?” Timothy regretted the words as soon as they left his mouth.

 

Tamarah stared at him, without saying anything. She’d wanted to but something told her to hold back. She was reminded of when they were at the docks and how he’d been brash with her then. “I take it holding your tongue is not something you have conquered yet.”

 

Timothy looked down at his plate, staring at it’s emptiness. He hadn’t realized he’d eaten everything that quickly. “You know Tamarah, I haven’t always been a Christian and I sure didn’t grow up with the Rawsins.” He stated, glancing up at her. Tamarah’s eyes sparkled their curiosity. “No?”

“No.”

“Were you a bad boy?” Tamarah inquired, teasingly, a soft smile on her face. As his gaze fell to her lips, he shook his head, she had no idea.

Glancing up at her, he asked, “Why don’t you want to go to church?”

 

Her eyes went to the table, “I’m kind of a private person. I don’t like people knowing my business.”

 

Timothy sighed, “Understandable, Tamarah, but everyone does things they are not proud of.”

 

“And church isn’t going to change that.” She stated while standing up to take her dishes to the sink. Timothy stood up, grabbing his items. He waited til she turned around before he handed them to her. “Church isn’t there to make your problems go away you know.”

 

Tamarah laughed, “Really?” Tamarah turned to face him and was surprised to find him a few feet in front of her.

 

His gaze was serious as he stared at her. “Really, it isn’t. Church is there to help you cope, give encouragement and help you to learn to love and respect God.”

 

Tamarah’s tone was breathless as she whispered, “And how is that working for you?”

 

He shrugged, his tone soft, “You tell me.”

 

Tamarah’s gaze waivered at the seriousness in his. She could see for the first time that there was an attraction in them. She could read the truth in his look. He did like her. Swallowing, her eyes drifted away from him and she said, “I have to clean off the table.” Timothy watched as she ran the dish towel over the table. She’d already cleaned the dishes they used. When completed, she stood at the table, refusing to move, her gaze meeting his. The dish towel dangling between her hands. As he stared at her, their was a heightened sense of attraction and the temptation to kiss her became strong. There was something about the sincerety in her eyes that called to him, almost seductive in a sense. It was pleading. He understood the reason for her standing by that table. If she moved any closer, it would be unbearable and undeniable of the unspoken attraction between them. He stood where he was, his gaze steady.

 

“I’m pregnant.” She stated. Her tone anxious.

 

He furrowed his brows, “yep.”

 

Tamarah’s gaze lowered, “I told my mom, you know.”

 

He raised his brows, “Yeah? Was she angry?”

 

Tamarah sighed, “No, all she said was, a lot of young girls get pregnant now adays.”

 

Timothy’s gaze went wide, “Seriously?”

 

 

Tamarah finally was able to move, walking past him, to the sink, “And then she went off to work.”

 

“She went to work?”

 

“Yeah. When she get home I think I’m going to talk to her about terminating the pregnancy.”

 

“Why not give the baby another home?” Timothy asked, “There are many people out there wanting to adopt.”

 

Tamarah shrugged her shoulders, “I can’t. I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if that happened.”

 

“And you can live with an abortion?” Timothy took the seat he’d had during dinner.

 

“Atleast I won'’t wonder if the baby’s being taken care of.”

 

“No, just about whether or not it would have been a boy or girl.” He stated.

 

Tamarah furrowed her brows, “Why is it that you always have something smart to say? Abortion is better than being a mother at fifteen.”

 

“Maybe you should have thought of that before you slept with the guy. I mean, it’s Tommy Whitaker for crying out loud, not someone actually worth sleeping with.”

 

Tamarah’s eyes got big, while Timothy wanted to slap himself on the mouth for saying what he said. Quickly his face turned beet red, to a point where his embarassment was extreme.

 

“Timothy Rawsin.” His name on her lips burned in his ears.

 

“I have to go. I will talk to you another time Tamarah.” He turned, swooping up his bag off the couch and running to the front door. Even as he pushed his way to the front door, he knew he wouldn’t come back over here.

~ ~

Vanessa POV:

I sat on the couch staring at both my mother and father like they were crazy. Another baby? They were having another child ten years after Craig and fourteen years after me? Why? “I think it will be cool having another baby around here.” Craig stated. I’ve always wondered why you guys never had more children outside of me and billy goat gruff over there, but then again, looking at how she acts, I wouldn’t want to have any more either.” I cut my eyes at him, “Shut up, el stupido. Mom, dad, another kid this late in the game, really?” My dad’s gaze went to me, “Are you going for a guiness book of world record for the most groundings ever, because if so, you’re on the fast track.” I sighed, and through clenched teeth stated, “Congrats. I hope this works out for ya’ll.” Mom flickered her eyes over to me, “Shut up. Seriously, one more time Vanessa.” I was irritated beyond belief. No one saw this as a disaster but me? First Tamarah now my mom. Seriously, I didn’t want to be the most talked about girl in ninth grade. I could see it now. Did you hear about Vanessa? Her mom and best-friend are pregnant at the same time.” I felt nauseous as I considered the laughter that would be at my expense. Life couldn’t get any worse than what it was at the moment. “So that means that you guys will be expected to help out more around here, especially when your mother gets further along in her pregnancy.” My dad was saying.

“I don’t mind mom, just give me a list and I’m good.” Craig stated. I narrowed my brows up to him. Unusually helpful. What was he up to?

“I’m glad. Your mom and I have decided to increase your allowance for the time being to show our appreciation.”

I raised a brow. More money meant more clothes, more shoes and well, anything else I wanted. I started thinking about my wardrobe and what could use an upgrade. Many ideas came to mind.

“Alright, dad, I am on board, how much are we talking here?”“Twenty extra bucks each month.”

I wasn’t satisfied with twenty but for the time being it would do. “Cool.”

"So, tomorrow, Vanessa, I want you to make sure that when you come home you to start the laundry."

 

"I can't dad, I have cheerleading practice."

 

"Yes, at five o'clock. There's a two hour window between school letting out and practice, so come home and start the laundry. Denise and I have our first appointment tomorrow with Dr. Lister, so please make sure that you get the clothes in the wash and in the dryer."

 

I sighed, "Alright, dad. That will do."

 

"Thank you." With that, I asked to be excused and dad agreed. 

 

Chapter Fourteen:

 

The following morning, after the kids had gone off to school, Denise who'd awaken later than usual came downstairs to find Jordan in his home office working from his desk. Glancing up at the clock, she inquired, her tone still a bit sluggish, “Why didn't you wake me up and aren't you supposed to be at the office?” His eyes never left the screen he was working from and said, “No, right now, I'm completing updated paperwork on The Harrelson case.”

Denise shrugged, “ok. Plan on staying all day?”

“Your appointment is at one and I want to make sure I'm there? What better plan to work through what I can while I can?”

“Work through what you can while you can?” This sounded strange to her. The only time he ever brought work home was when there was an overflow in his schedule or he was wrapping up a case. Sighing, Denise crossed her arms over her chest, “So what's this about?”

The doorbell intruded on her question, signaling the arrival of someone else. Standing up, Jordan glanced at her, “Nothing. I just thought it was a day for leisure.”

Denise narrowed her brows, biting her bottom lip in suspicion. As he passed her, he placed a kiss on the top of her forehead. Denise turned and followed him toward the living room. As she did, she watched as the door opened and he greeted someone, “Hi Gina.”

“Hi Mr. Williams, thanks for allowing me to come in today, I have those papers that you requested on Monday. It took a long time for me to get acess to them.”

“That's fine, I just wanted to stay at home today. My wife has a doctor's appointment and I don't want to chance that I'll miss it, given how often I work.”

Denise furrowed her brows in confusion. In all the years that she'd known Jordan, there was never a time where a client was actually brought to their house. This caused a red flag to plant itself in her mind. She waited for him and the lady to step into the living-room before she greeted her. Jordan who was ahead of her, stood next to Denise, put his arm around her waist and smiled up at this girl named Gina, “Hi Gina, this is my wife, Denise, Denise, this is a client of mine, Gina.”

Denise stared at the girl, unable to move her lips at first, because the woman Gina in front of her drew her speachless with the way she looked and wore long red hair down past her shoulders. “Nice to meet you,” The woman spoke.

“You as well.” Denise plastered on a smile as the lady shook her hand. Glancing around, Gina sprang another compliment, “Nice home.” She stated, her tone amiable. “Thank you. My wife works hard to maintain our house hold. Denise still couldn't fanthom a reason as to why he brought this woman to their home. It was so uncharacteristic of him. “Jordan, may I speak with you please.”

Jordan nodded and answered, “Let me show Gina where my office is first.”

Denise waited til he came back into the living-room before whispering, “I can't believe you just did that.”

“What?”

“That!” She hissed, gesturing toward his office.

“I just wanted to make sure you made it to your appointment. This way it's easier.”

Denise stared at him, unable to understand this decision but shrugged, “Alright, if you say so. I'm going to check the mail.”

“Yep.”

With that, Denise went outside to check the mail. After sorting through several bills and a coupon booklet from piggly wiggly, she came upon an envelope addressed to her. There was a stamp on it from the Grisham Middle School in Dover Virginia, an area a good twenty miles from home. Opening the letter, she read it:

 

145 S. Grisham Road

Dover, Virginia 23484

May 13, 2018

 

Dear Mrs. Denise Williams

1250 Penn Lane

Hampton, Virginia 23681

 

Dear Mrs. Williams, we are excited to have you join our team here at Grimsham Middle School for the beginning of the school year on August 8, 2018, we ask that you arrive at the school on August first for the New Teacher's Orientation and then again on August 7, for student orientation. We welcome you to Grisham Middle School and hope that you find your career with us rewarding. We look forward to meeting you at the New Teachers' orientation.

We have also attached a school schedule for your convience.

Faculty of Grisham middle school.

 

Denise stared at the letter, a smile on her face. She'd gotten the job. When she applied, she'd figured someone more experienced would get the teaching position at the school since she'd only taught for the first four years after obtaining her degree. Once Jordan received his first promotion and she'd found out that she was pregnant, she'd quit. She had missed it so much that around the fall of last year she'd began applying everywhere she could think of. Once such place had been Grisham Middle School. Because she'd never heard back from them, she decided to just forget the position all together, so to have received a hired letter baffled her.

Not only because of being hired, but because the blessing seemed to come at the wrong time. Everything from her pregnancy, to the fact that she'd neglected to tell her husband she'd even applied, to what was going on with her daughter, signaled the wrong timing for a teaching position. Sighing, she stuffed the letter back in its envelope and then slipped it in her back pocket.

Tomorrow, she'd call the school and tell them that because of her pending pregnancy, she would not accept the position. As she thought about this, she was saddened. She'd gotten her hopes up while applying, believing that someone would eventually hire her and now that it had happened, she couldn't accept the position. Inhaling sharply, she pushed back the tears that wanted to form and exhaled as she opened the screen door, leading into her home.

 

“Just tell her I'm busy, you know, that I can't work on the project right now.” Timothy stated, staring down at a fake chemistry test that was laying out on his bed, as he instructed Kalen on what to say to Tamarah, in an effort to not have to communicate with her. Kalen shoved the house phone at him, “Tell her yourself.” Timothy glared up at her. He didn't want to talk to Tamarah because his heart was pounding and truth be told, he was embarrassed about getting angry at her. He'd never felt that way about any girl and it was beyond him as to why he behaved in that fashion. He had dated many other attractive girls up til two years ago and never once acted the way he had with her. She seemed to get beneath his cool exterior and it wasn't pretty.

Putting the phone up to his ear, he said, “Hey Tamarah.”

“Are you ok?” She inquired, her tone light hearted.

“Yeah, why you ask?” His heart was pounding in his ears, protesting the lie he'd just told.

“You know, I just wanted to make sure because we still have to wrap up this project and I want to know when you will be available.”

“We will but now is not a good time.” He stated.

“Well, when is?”

He sighed, glancing up at the large calendar displayed on the oak colored wall in front of him. He knew he couldn't put it off, but the longest he could was Saturday, which was perfect because it was due that Monday. “Saturday works for you?”

“Saturday...but that's so close to the due date of the project. I was kind of hoping sooner.”

“Saturday is the only day I'm available.” He stated, hoping God wouldn't strike him dead for lying, but the honest truth was that he had to stay away from her for as long as he could. The way she worked his system made him wary. It was becoming more and more difficult to hide the attraction he had toward her. Working this project had brought out even more qualities he hadn't known, the most recent being that she was an awesome cook. “Alright Saturday then.” She finally agreed. They sat there, the line quiet between the two. Finally, Tamarah said, “Bye Tim, I'll speak to you another time.”

“Bye, Tamarah. See you Saturday.”

“Yep.”

Timothy waited for the line to click before he finally hung up. A lump formed in his throat and anxiety build up as he thought about the upcoming Saturday. It still wasn't far enough away.

~ ~

Tamarah hung up the line after calling Timothy and sat there pondering about how she would approach the events of the previous weekend this weekend. Timothy had been deliberately avoiding her all this week and despite her understanding of it, she didn't approve. She didn't know what it was about guys that when confronted with the truth they had a tendency to deny it and live in a state of refute. Sighing, her gaze went back to the baby growing in her stomach and she wondered if it would be a boy or a girl, if it would look like her or Tommy.

She wondered even more so if Vanessa would ever forgive her. If there was one thing she never anticipated, it was that she'd loose her best friend at fifteen. She'd bend hell and high water just to get her back. She had no one she could seriously confided in. Although she really liked Timothy, he was too judgmental of her situation. She wondered why he felt the need to be critical with her. Never had she witnessed him be that way with other girls. He was more sympathetic. However to her, he wasted no time diving right in, letting her know he disapproved. She tried to comprehend, but no matter how hard she tried, the reasoning always alluded her. She could see that he liked her, but she couldn't fanthom a guy liking a girl and not being sympathetic to their needs. Was that normal? As she thought about this, her heart beat began to speed up and she felt dread. If he couldn't be sensitive toward her, then how was she supposed to show him who she really was?

Although she still felt that earth shattering emotion when she looked into his eyes, the avoidance he worked hard at was embarassing enough. As her thoughts went to the surrounding events of the school suspension she'd received, she felt a tug of fear. She hadn't gone to school since last friday. Tomorrow was Thursday, the day she'd return to school which she knew she wasn't ready for. The stares, the guffaws, the disgust. No, she wasn't ready to walk through that building. As fear clouded her heart and mind, she buried her face into her pillow and cried, afraid to face tomorrow.

~ ~

Denise waited close to two thirty before she entered her husband's office, a good fifteen minutes after his one o'clock appointment, Gina Harrelson left. “Jordan, why did you bring that woman to our house?” She wasted no time honing in on her provocation.

“I told you why earlier.”

“It escapes my mind as to why you couldn't continue your appointment at your office and then come home in time for my appointment.”

“I told you why.”

“Yes, I suppose so, but guess what?”

“What?”

“My appointment is at three forty five and we have yet to leave.”

Jordan looked down at his watch. “Damn it, Denise, why didn't you just say something?”

“I thought you had things under control. I mean that is why you brought your work home with you, right?” Her words were riddled with sarcasm. Jordan stared up at her, “It is. We are a half an hour from the clinic. We can leave now.”

“Can you guess how far the clinic is from your place of business?” She inquired.

Jordan's gaze went up to hers, his burning bright green, with little flecks of silvery grey. “How far?”

Her tone was sour as she answered, “Two blocks.”

“Oh yeah?”

“Yeah.”

“I didn't know that.”

“Funny how you'd never notice a clinic around the corner from your work place when you've been there for seven years.” She crossed her arms, glaring at him, watching the feigned innocence.

“True. When you're always busy you don't have time to look around at your surroundings.”

Turning away from him, Denise cleared her throat, “I'm going out to the car.” Without another word, she walked out of his office, her heart in turmoil.

On the way to the clinic, Jordan tried to open conversation. “How do you think the baby is doing?”

“I don't know.”

“How far along are you?”

“You know what Jordan, I'm really not in the mood to talk.” She stated, her gaze turned toward the window.

“Ok.” He reached down to turn on the radio. She stopped him with her words, “Please don't.”

She didn't say anything, just continued staring out of the window. The silence was really thick in the car and Jordan knew she was upset over earlier. He hadn't thought about what it looked like to bring his client to his home, but he'd wanted to be around her. He wanted to make sure that he didn't miss this appointment. At-least that's what he told himself, however, in the crevices of his mind, he knew his reasons were not as justifiable as they sounded and it bothered him that his wife knew.

“Ok, Denise, I brought her to the house because I didn't feel comfortable having her at the office, ok.”

“I don't want to talk about that, Jordan. You told me why you brought her there and I believe you.”

“And I believe you're lying, I'd stake my life on it.”

“This is not the time to talk about this, we have an appointment to get to.” Jordan dropped the subject, but knew he'd bring it up again later.

 

When they arrived at the clinic, Jordan went to her side of the door, opened it and she stepped out. As she exited the vehicle, his gaze stared down into her face, feeling the tension she had. Standing in her way, he sighed, “If it makes you feel any better Denise, I will refrain from bringing my work home. It won't happen again.” As she stared up into his face, she felt the jealousy she had melt away. The way his eyes shimmered, caused a tremble to begin on her bottom lip. She felt a deep burn begin in her heart and work it's way through her body. He didn't say anything, just stared. She continued to hold his gaze for another sixty seconds before looking away, unable to take the intensity in them. Her heart was pounding so heavy, it could have been pumping on the outside. It wasn't long before she felt his hand slide through hers, holding onto it, pulling her toward the office.

 

 

 

 

 

Chapter Fifteen:

 

Vanessa flickered her curly hair over her shoulder, glancing down at the text book she'd opened as soon as she'd gotten home from school. She'd been studying just shy of two hours when the door bell rang, telling her it was time to take a break. Closing the book, she sat it down on the arm of the recliner she'd been sitting in and made her way to the foyer. Upon opening it, she went to close it, but a foot was nudged in between to keep it from closing. “I swear, I just want to talk to you.”

She pursed her lips together at her unwanted guest, staring into dark brown eyes. “I have nothing to say to you Tommy.”

“Come on V, that's not cool.”

Vanessa shook her head, “What's not cool is you sleeping with my best friend. What's not cool is you getting said friend pregnant. That's bull shit.”

He exhaled. “I didn't get her pregnant.”

She feigned a laugh, “Yeah, she just got that way miraculously, right?”

“Look I don't know who got her pregnant but it wasn't me. I used protection that night.”

Vanessa put her hand up to her head, suddenly feeling an ache coming at her temples. “Tommy, I don't care if it's yours or not, I don't want to talk to you, now move the hell out of the way.” She went to push the door against his foot. He nudged his body in between the door jam. “Come on baby, don't be like that.”

As she stared into his eyes, her heart went soft at the pleading in them. “Be like what? Tommy, we were supposed to take that step together, not you and Tamarah.”

“I know and I'm sorry.”

“I bet.”

“I am. It wasn't intentional girl. You know I've always held you in the highest regard.”

“How poetic.” She rolled her eyes, feeling a burn began in her chest. He reached out and touched her, which for some reason didn't bring repulsion to her body. Instead it fueled the desire within her to have him. “I'm sorry girl. You know I would not hurt you. I love you. You are the one I want. The one I need.”

“Of course I am Tommy. You need to move because my parents are going to be here any minute.”

“I know they don't like me, but come on V...you know me. We've known each other since grade school. I've wanted you since the first moment I set eyes on you.”

Vanessa swallowed, feeling the rising thump in her chest. “Tommy, I can't do this, not now.” He exhaled sharply, his mint scented breath tickling her senses. Reaching out, he grabbed her hand quickly, pulling her toward him.
“It was an isolated incident. I swear up until that party Tamarah and I hadn't even done anything, you know she and I can't stand each other.”

“That's what I thought.”

“It's the truth. People do stupid things when they drink. I did and I'm sorry.”

“I bet you are, now let go of my arm,” she stated, pulling out of his reach.

“I am...Look, Tamarah meant nothing to me.”

“Let go of me.” His grasp was getting tighter.

“Vanessa, please...” He stated, his tone fighting to stay even.

“Go, now. I don't want to talk to you.” She pulled hard to release herself, but instead of letting go, Tommy shoved himself the rest of the way in and pushed her back against the nearest wall. “Please, Vanessa...” His eyes bore into hers, burning, aching, begging. She felt trembles over take her. Not because she was afraid, but because the close proximity in which his body was to hers was really starting to frustrate her. How could a guy, even one in his situation manage to look and smell so good. Good Lord, he was fine. “Tommy, I..I can't...” Her words sounded weak, nervous. He leaned in close to her, “Vanessa, I love you and I'm sorry. I'm so sorry.”

“I...” Her voice trailed off as his head leaned closer to hers, his breath on her neck like a hot mist. She felt and heard the inhalation of breath. “Please...” She clenched her hand into tight fists, now feeling the tension that began to pool inside her own anatomy. With that one word she felt what he meant. She felt his sorrow, his pain and his agony within it. She felt his love in it. Slowly a tear slid down her cheek, then another one, and another one, til he whispered. “I swear to you I'm so sorry. I will never do that again. Just give me another chance, please.”

 

Swiping at her tears, Vanessa felt the weight on her heart. “You must leave now. My mom and dad will be here any minute.” Just as she spoke, the phone rang. It rang three times before the answering machine clicked on, “Hey V...we are on our way home now. See you when we get there.” The sound of her mother's voice on the answering machine sent chills down his neck. God, he hated that woman. As a reason all the more to piss her off, he continued to try and persuade her daughter. “Vanessa come on girl, you know I love you. You know I...” Just as he was about to speak, he felt a hold on the back of his neck. One so strong, he couldn't move it to see who'd grasped him. Just like that, Tommy felt his feet lifted out from under him and he was sent rolling down the grassy lawn away from the house.

 

After a couple of rolls, he got up and dusted himself off. “Come on Mr. Williams, I just wanted to talk to her.” Jordan's gaze was vehement upon him, his anger radiating from his body. Shaking his head, he said, “Stay away from my daughter.” With that, he turned on into the house. Tommy watched with disdain as the door closed, seemingly to shut him out. He pursed his lips in anger. Nothing would keep him from Vanessa. Not one damn thing. He felt his entire body heat up at the thought of having to back away from her. There was no way he'd let someone take what was his.

 

Swallowing the feelings of wrath that swelled in the base of his throat, he turned and walked way from the house, across the street to his own car. Once getting in the 2004 prius, he opened the glove compartment and twisted the cap off a bottle of pillls. Sliding one on-top his tongue, he felt it began to work it's magic by making his mouth numb.

~ ~

Tommy turned the ignition off his car, going to the house and unlocking the door. The hallway was littered with unwashed clothing, giving off a musky scent. Shuffling through the mess, he found his way to the living room, where his little brother was playing a video game. Going past him, he came to the kitchen where dishes were piled up to the ceiling, food drippings were all over the place, giving the kitchen not only an unkempt appearance but an obvious neglect factor. He already knew there was mold growing on the dishes and most likely the garbage pail.

 

Exhaling sharply, he went to the fridge and found nothing in there. This angered him. That bitch of a mother of his, cared more about men and drugs than she did providing for her own children. It was beyond him how the state hadn't taken his brother yet. In a month, Tommy would be turning 18 and he'd start filing for custody for his brother. He'd told his mother, the day he'd turn eighteen he was getting his own and taking his brother with him. He knew his mother received assistance from the state, plus a check for both him and his brother. Instead of her doing something to get out of this situation, she seemed to give up and just wallow in it. Inhaling sharply, he went to her bedroom off the back of the house, which wasn't too far considering the house was a little space barely 900sq feet. Knocking on her door, he was greeted with, “Stay the fuck away from my door!”

 

“Ma, you need to get up. It's after two and Rodney in here by his self.”

 

“So what, he good. Playing them damn games, now get the fuck away from my door.” Ignoring her, Tommy pushed open the door. Going to the dresser, he grabbed her wallet off top and pulled out the four twenties that were always there. The wallet made a loud Thunk, as it hit the dresser top after a throw. Sighing, he closed the bedroom door, went back to the living room, approaching his little brother. “Let's go eat.” He stated, cutting the tv off. Rodney threw down the remote and ran for the door, no questions asked.

~ ~

Adrian Matthews drew in a deep breath as Tommy whitaker approached her counter, his little brother in tow.

 

“You can't leave him here.” She stated, knowing his intention.

 

“Come on Adrian, I can't leave him at the house either, you know how mom is.”

Adrian shook her head, “Your mom. Not mine.”

 

Tommy shrugged his shoulders, agitation already creeping up his spine. “By birth only. Look, just watch him for a couple of hours. I got some business to take care of.”

 

“Bull shit, you probably going to smoke.” Tommy gritted his teeth together. He always had to combat suspicious thoughts that he smoked. He didn't smoke. “I'll be back, alright?” Without waiting for another word, he ran out of the dinner and got in his car, heading toward the freeway.

~ ~

“One pill? You want thirty bucks for one pill?”

 

“High demand, my brotha.”

 

“so this is that good?”

 

“high demand.” The dealer stated, his hand extended to the young man. Tommy sighed, pulling his money out. He really needed this, especially after all of what had been going on with Tamarah being pregnant and Vanessa acting like she didn't want him. He snorted at that thought. Even he had a hard time believing that possible. Although he could have had any girl he chose, there was something about her that drove him to the brink of sanity and back. The problem was, there was too much she possessed that he wanted, needed, craved and too much to let slip down the drain. Especially not over a small mishap. Oh well, Tamarah was pregnant. That wasn't his fault. He didn't find that surprising considering how she networked. All she ever did was flirt. Anything that walked by her was fair game. Any guy. If it meant she would get her way, there would be some slight flirtation. Shaking his head, he dismissed thoughts, of the bitch and continued his conversation with the dealer. “I got sixty.”

The dealer handed him a pre packaged product. As Tommy glanced down at the two small pills, he handed the guy the money he had. This would get him by for the day. Just as the money exchanged, he was surprised to hear “everybody freeze.” Unable to move, he stood where he was as the man in front of him pulled out a shield. “Dammit.” He mumbled under his breath. Although it was his first time being caught, he was determined not to show his fear. As the cops handcuffed him and put him in the back of their truck, he began thinking of a way out of this.

~ ~

 

“Mom I swear I didn't tell him to come here.”

“Ofcourse you didn't hun, and I am going up to my room.”

 

Cutting her eyes at Jordan, Denise stated, “You take care of this.”

 

Jordan shrugged his shoulders, looking at Vanessa. “So I take it he just busted through that door?”

 

“Yeah.” Vanessa stated.

 

“He also shoved you up against the wall in one of the most provocative positions imaginable?”

 

“Yeah, that's exactly what happened.” Vanessa stated, nodding her head.

 

“Jordan I'll be down around dinner time.” Denise stated, her tone hard as she went to their bedroom.

 

“Dammit mom, why don't you believe me?” Vanessa inquired. “Ya'll both know how I get when I'm pissed off. I don't want that idiot.” Her emotions burst through that one comment as tears welled up in her eyes. Jordan watched, his heart shattering into a million pieces as his daughter's green eyes filled to the brim and she began to cry. His body stiffened as he felt anger, agitation and pain slither through his body at once. The tears that slid down her cheeks wracked her body so hard, she sunk down to the floor, her heart inconsolable.

 

“Vanessa, baby...Come on..” He stated going to her, pulling her up into his arms. She cried on his shoulder as she had when she was a child. “Why, daddy? Why did this have to happen to me? Why did he have to go and sleep with my best friend? Why?”

 

Offering comfort, Jordan pulled her around to face him and held her as she bawled her eyes out. He wished he could remove the pain and suffering that was there.

Chapter Sixteen

 

"God at times bring trials our way to draw us close to him. He allows things to happen so that we may acknowledge and know who he is, so that we may acknowledge our sins and ask for forgiveness..."

 

Kalen flickered her tape recorder, wrote the words, trials, draw, acknowledge and forgiveness in her notebook, before pressing play again. 

 

"He at times allow trials to come our way to test our love for him, just as he allowed King David to suffer through the hands of King Saul, and Job to suffer through loosing his family, health and material possessions, God allows us to suffer through various trials so that we may endure to the finish. Just as Jesus had to die on the cross for our sins as the ultimate test of his loyalty, obedience and desire to please our heavenly father..."

 

The sound of the pastor faded as Kalen's head phones flew out of her ear and her cd player hit the floor. "Oops, my bad." Her former bestfriend was looking down at her, her eyes hot with anger.

 

Kalen stood up and faced Clarissa, "Really Clarissa? Dang!" She pushed passed her to grab her cd player. Clarissa pushed the device away from her, knocking it into a corner. "My bad Kalen." 

 

Kalen wrapped her arms around each other. "What is your deal?" 

 

"You. I can't stand you."

 

"As I recall, you used to be my bestfriend." 

 

"Due to bad taste." She stated, her tone sour. Her face filled with anger.

 

"If that's the case, why do you mess with me so much? I've done nothing but be nice to you."

"Spitting that Jesus crap. Sure nice I suppose."

"It's true. You do need to be saved, Clarissa."

"Hmmm." With that, Clarissa pulled her bag up on her shoulder. Her gaze going beyond Kalen. "What ever. I'll deal with you later." She then rushed past Kalen, toward the chem building. Kalen rolled her eyes.

 

That girl made her mad so much at times she could beat the mess out of her and if Kalen had been the same angry child she'd been years earlier, she'd beaten her to a pulp by now. Putting her note book in her bag, she turned to make her way to the field yard, where the new gym had been made. She had gym now. As she did so, she was surprised to see Vanessa Williams walking her way. As she reached the thresh hold of where Kalen stood, Kalen smiled.

 

"Hi Vanessa." Vanessa looked as if she was ready to punch somebody's face in. "Hi Kalen, was Clarissa bothering you?"

 

Kalen shrugged, "Why?"

 

"Because I have been waiting to get ahold of that girl again and right now, with the way I'm feeling, it's as good a time as any." Vanessa rolled up her sleeves. Grasping her bag tightly around her hands.

 

"Girl, Clarissa's not worth it. Are you the reason she took off?"

 

"Oh she did?"

 

"Yeah."

 

"I should beat her ass just for running then."

 

"Why do you always want to fight, Vanessa?"

 

"I haven't faught that much this year."

 

"Vanessa, I've heard about the fights you have had with girls."

 

"Well, I haven't had one campus fight nor have I gotten suspended for anything."

 

"I think that's more so your mother's doing."

 

Vanessa shrugged her shoulders, "How do you know my mother? Miss bible toting teen."

 

Kalen smiled, "I pay attention to what goes on here."

 

"So I suppose you've heard what's happened between Tamarah and I right?"

 

"It's school, everybody knows."

 

"She's such a bitch for that." Vanessa stated, her tone heavy.

 

"I suppose you want to beat her up too, or have you?"

 

Vanessa shrugged, "Can't beat a pregnant girl, that's just crazy. I'm going to wait till she have the baby."

 

"How nice of you to wait til the baby comes out." Kalen replied sarcastically.

 

Vanessa gave a soft laugh, "It's very thoughtful right?"

 

Kalen laughed, "Seriously though, Vanessa, perhaps you should find something else to do with your anger."

 

"I'm not going to church Kalen, you may as well forget that."

 

"All I'm saying is that a girl your age with two parents who love you and who have treated you like gold, deserves more than just to be known as the girl everyone else is scared of."

 

"Not everybody is scared of me Kalen. None of my friends are."

 

"Yes they are, that's why they didn't tell you about what happened at the party."

Vanessa narrowed her brows, "What do you know about that party?"

 

Kalen shrugged, "Relax girl, I didn't go, but my brother went." Kalen slapped her hand over her mouth. Dang it, why did things find there way out of her mouth all the time.

 

Vanessa put a hand on her hip, dipping her head to the left, "Timothy Rawsin went to that party?"

 

"Well, I mean, he wasn't there partying or anything..." She smacked her head with her right hand.

 

Vanessa put her hand on her waist, "If not then why..." Her voice trailed off. Her eyes grew big, going back up to Kalen. A smile went across her face, "He has the hots for Tamarah doesn't he?"

 

Kalen licked her lips. "Look, nobody is supposed to know that. He has faught really hard to keep that bit of information to himself."

 

"Why? Tamarah's crazy about that boy. I'm sure he's noticed how she always trying to talk to him."

 

Kalen shrugged, "He's looking for a wife, not a girl friend."

 

"Who the hell looks for a wife in high school?" Vanessa inquired.

 

"He is a Christian Vanessa, it's not like he just bangs anything walking."

 

Vanessa crossed her arms over each other, "Well, I guess, but um I don't think Tamarah is the marrying type, I mean being fifteen and all."

 

Kalen laughed, "I know and so does he. That's why he won't even attempt to talk to her. That and she's not saved. Tim is a junior in high school anyway. I'm sure that crush will go away."

 

Vanessa sighed, "Well, I gotta go, the bell's going to rang." Just as she spoke, the bell rang.

 

"See you later, Vanessa and remember, "Tell no one what I told you."

 

Vanessa rolled her eyes. she doubt anyone would care what was going on with Timothy right now, especially in the middle of Tamarah's treachery.

 

 

~                                                                                                                                                ~

 

 

"Tamarah, pull your damn self together and get out of this car."

 

Tamarah glanced over at her mom, her heart pounding, head throbbing and irritation in her voice, "Thanks for the pep talk mom."

 

"You did this to yourself. Nobody told you to go and sleep with your best friend's boyfriend and frankly, I thought you had better taste than that in boys. He has no class what so ever. A walking thug."

 

Tamarah sighed, "Tommy's not a thug mom. He's a jerk, there's a difference."

 

"Well, I'm still not sure why you'd sleep with that boy."

 

"You know what mom, thanks for the ride. I'll see you after school." Tamarah stated, getting ready to open the passenger door. 

 

"I have to work today, so I won't be able to pick you up." Her mother stated, her dark brown eyes, staring into the mirror attached to the visor. Angela Gray was equally as beautiful as her daughter, with the same dark brown skin, long silky hair and full lips that stayed groomed in lipstick. Her beauty was stunning. Her coldness was equally as stunning.

 

"You know what mom, maybe if you were at home once in a while I wouldn't have to always go seek attention else where." 

 

Angela smacked her lips together, "Puhlease, Tamarah, grow up. You are fifteen years old, well able to take care of your self, and don't give me that mommy neglect me spill. It played out at twelve."

 

Tamarah stared at her mother, her eyes hot with anger, "Whatever. I'm gone. I'll have someone drop me off at home."

 

Tamarah got out of the car and slammed her door shut. Her mom didn't speak, just drove off. God she couldn't stand that woman. How was it that no matter what she said, Tamarah was never right. Her mother was always right. 

 

~                                                                                                                                            ~

 

Tamarah flickered her long dark hair over her shoulder as she made her way to the front of the building, where a click of girls were sitting with their bodies facing outward, glancing- more like glaring at her. "What the hell are you looking at?" One girl barked at her.

 

"Once a ho, always a ho Brooke. Looking at you is one thing, but beware when she starts looking at your man. Vivian Tucker stated, her gaze both disdainful and cold. The girl called Brooke laughed, her fair cheeks reddening a little. Tamarah rolled her eyes, "I don't have time for this." Another girl, stepped in front of her. Her arms folded, showing a lack of respect for Tamarah in her eyes.

 

"Yes you do, ho. So tell us, did you suck his dick too?" The other girls were first silent but then broke out into loud laughter.

 

Tamarah, unable to hold in her anger, lashed out at the girl and landed a smack! against her face, whipping the young girl's head around. Her heart was pounding, eyes wide and the adrenaline she felt caused Tamarah to shake, loosing more control over herself.

 

"Damn Viv, she hit you good." The girl Brooke stated, coming up to her. Vivien Tucker's mocha colored skin flushed as she pulled up her sleeves. "Vanessa didn't deserve what you did to her Tamarah. You were supposed to be her friend. With friends like you, who needs enemies." Before Tamarah could respond, she was cast out with spit in her face. It was then her hands began to twitch and just as she reached up to give her the choke of a life time, she heard a voice say, "He that is without sin cast the first stone."

 

Another voice from the group of girls groaned and she said, "I can't hear this, I'm going to class. See ya'll later. The girl with her followed behind her. Brooke and Vivien stayed put. Tamarah stared at her with a new found hatred.

 

"You don't know what you're talking about." Her rescuerer had now chosen to make his presence known, standing in front of her. "This don't have anything to do with you Timothy, so mind your own business."

 

He exhaled, "Neither does it have anything to do with you. So leave her alone."

 

"Well, I'm making it my business. Somebody has to. I'm surprised Vanessa hasn't whipped her ass by now."

 

"That doesn't have anything to do with you. Vanessa knows she can talk to Tamarah any time she need to."

 

Brooke laughed, "So, what Timothy, you and Tamarah got something going on?" Her sky blue eyes were wide, her lips twitching a smile.

 

"None of your business, just leave her alone. Ya'll not any better than her."

 

"Yeah, well, we didn't sleep with our best friend's guy now did we?"

 

"Maybe not but ya'll are no better. Besides Jesus would call both of ya'll fake christians, right? Ya'll are Holy at church but it's different at school. I'm sure your moms would love to know what you both just said to her."

With that, Vivien's cheeks turned so red, she said, "What ever, I'll see you another time Tamarah."

 

Tamarah flipped her off.  Brooke tossed her hair at the two as if dismissing them and she walked away. Vivien's eyes stayed on Tamarah until she finally turned and went in the same direction as Brooke. 

 

Once they left, Timothy turned to her, "You should watch out for that girl."

 

"I know. Even pregnant, I still can whip her ass." 

 

Timothy nodded, "I believe you." 

 

Tamarah sighed, "Thanks." 

 

Timothy nodded, "Well, I'll see you later."

 

As he started to walk away, Tamarah stopped him with a call of his name. He turned back to her. 

 

"Why'd you step in there?"

 

"No one deserves to be talked to like that."

 

"No? You sure it doesn't have anything to do with this weekend?"

 

He gave a soft smile. "I had my reasons for behaving the way I did this weekend."

 

"Yeah?"

 

"It wasn't to shame you."

 

"No?"

 

"No. I did it because I care about you. They just want to hate you for what you did."

 

"What I did was wrong."

 

"Yeah, so. It doesn't give them the right to say stuff like that. If their parents heard them, they'd both be in trouble."

 

"Fake ass Christians." 

 

Timothy felt the corners of his mouth tilt in a smile.

 

Tamarah narrowed her eyes, "Is that a smile?" 

 

Timothy's eyes twinkled as he stared at her. 

 

"Can we be friends?" Tamarah inquired, her gaze serious.

 

"I thought we were?" 

 

"Let's make it official." 

 

"Official?" He laughed at this.

 

"Yeah." 

 

Shaking his head, he said, "Well you take care Tamarah, I'll see you later."

 

"Yep."

 

With that, he went on to class. 

~                                                                                                                                           ~

 

Tamarah had gone through first, second, third and fourth periods without any incidents like the one earlier that morning. It was during her fifth hour that the teacher pulled her aside and told her that Mrs. Dephne the school counselor wanted to see her. 

 

When she went to the counselor, Mrs. Dephne took out several snacks and offered her one. "How are you doing today Tamarah?" 

 

"Fine. Why?" 

 

"Have a seat please." 

 

Tamarah took the seat facing Mrs. Dephne desk. "How's everything going for you?"

 

"Fine, why?"

 

"Just curious. Have you told your mom the news yet?"

 

Tamarah sighed, pulling a pretzel out of the bag she'd sat in front of her.

 

"Why do psych doctors always want to know everything?"

 

"We just want to help."

 

"Help with what? All ya'll seem to do is get in mine and everybody else's business."

 

"Talking does help you know."

 

"That's what friends are for."

 

"We could be friends." Mrs. Dephne's tone was too eager sounding. Tamarah gaffawed at this. "So what you think you're talking to a seven year old? Don't be fooled, I'm not a kid." 

 

"What did your mom say when you told her about the pregnancy?"

 

"Nothing."

 

"Nothing?"

 

"Not a thing. She rushed out the house, went to work and I was left alone til she got off. Nothing unusual about that."

 

"I saw her drop you off this morning."

 

Tamarah rolled her eyes, sighing, "Talk about hawk eyes."

 

"The parking lot is not far from my window, I can see and hear everything that goes on."

 

"Great, now I don't have to talk about the convo." Tamarah glanced down at her watch a quarter to one. 

 

"The bell's going to ring in a few minutes to end class, can I go now?"

 

"I'll give you a pass to class. Let's continue talking."

 

"What else you want to know?"

 

"I want to know what your mom thinks about your pregnancy?"

 

"Nothing. She doesn't care one way or another. She just works. I told her that she was the reason why I was pregnant, she said I'm too old for the guilt trip."

 

"Really?"

 

"Yeah. Can I go now?" Tamarah was clenching at her back pack.

 

The counselor sighed, "See you Wednesday."

 

"Yeah, alright, bye." With that, she got up and left the office without looking back. 

 

~                                                                                                             ~

 

"I don't caare, you can do what ever you want, call my parents. I'm not going to see the counselor."

 

"Vanessa, we are concerned about you, that's all. We know that this incident hasn't been easy to go through."

 

Vanessa sighed, her gaze going down to her shoes. She didn't respond to that statement. 

 

"At least let her know that you are ok to be on campus." The assistant principal Mrs. Warner stated. Vanessa didn't respond. She just sat quietly with her head down.

 

"Alright then, you leave me no choice but to contact your parents." Mrs. Warner and Mrs. Dephne was standing there, their shoulders squared, trying to convince her it would be in her best interest to talk to Mrs. Dephne, but it had been an hour and she still refused to talk to Mrs. Dephne.

 

Vanessa listened as they first called her mother, when she didn't answer they called her father. He didn't answer either. 

 

"Are they the only two we have contact numbers for?"

 

"Victoria Paneleki is the next contact on the list."

 

"Call her then. Keep going down the list til you find someone who will answer." Mrs. Dephne stated. Vanessa sighed and rolled her eyes. She hoped her aunt Victoria was home, that way she could come and get her. Maybe get her away from school for the day. Although Victoria lived in New York, she frequented the area for different fashion shows and clients who requested house calls. 

 

~                                                                                                                              ~

 

Victoria flipped the lady off that was in line in front of her as her Lexus rolled past the lady's 2016 Prius. The lady was not paying attention as she made her way further down the highway. Vanessa on the other hand was set to get off at the next ramp for Hampton, when her phone rang. Immediately, the piece in her ear clicked and she spoke, "Victoria Paneleki speaking, how may I help you?"

 

"Hello, this is Helen Warner and I'm calling in regards to your neice Vanessa Williams..." She didn't complete the sentence before Victoria said, "I'm right around the corner, I'll be there in a minute." With out waiting for a comment, she told her phone to end the call.

 

When Victoria arrived at the school, Vanessa was in the principal's office sitting there with her head in her lap. The click clack of Victoria's heels and the smell of her Halle Berry perfume made Vanessa look up. Victoria's brown eyes held a smile for her favorite neice. "Hey, what's going on?" She asked, heading toward her. Vanessa stood up, her dark wavy hair a little messy. The lip gloss she wore softened her look and made her look more her age, while the beige blouse and blue jeans accentuated a beautiful curvaceous shape. "Hey auntie." Victoria smiled as she wrapped her arms around her neice, "How's it going lovely?"

 

"They're trying to make me go to counseling and I told them no."

 

Victoria's brows furrowed,confused "Counseling? Why?"

 

"We have reason to believe that your neice may not be dealing with the situation appropriately."

 

Victoria glanced over at the lady who'd spoken. A lady who's complexion mirrored her own, "What are you talking about?" Her brown eyes were bright as she spoke, full of concern.

 

"There was an incident that took place the other day and we are concerned that your neice may not be coping with it well." 

 

"What incident?"

 

"That we can't disclose to you." 

 

"You brought me all the way up here for an incident you can't disclose to me? Lady, I don't know who you think you're talking to, but I'm not a fool. If you have a reason for me to be here you better darn well tell it because if not I'll take her out of this place and you won't stop me."

 

"Ma'am we can talk about the situation if Vanessa allows it."

 

"What's going on?" Victoria glanced down at her neice, see for the first time in a long time a glazed over look in her eyes. 

 

"Tommy got Tamarah pregnant. They want me to take counseling for it and I told them no."

 

"We are required by law to do all that is within our power to help out our pupils, especially pupils we know are prone to violence." 

 

Vanessa's eyes went to them, flashing hot fires of green. Before she could say anything Victoria spoke, "Violent? Did you get her parents permission before engaging in this type of discussion?"

 

"We have a right to according to the law...." 

 

"To intervene when it is necessary or there are any indications of violence, but you don't have a right to make her take counseling without the consent of her parents. If her parents didn't give you permission to psychoanalyse,..."

 

"That's not what we're trying to do..." The counselor interjected, "We just want to make sure she's alright."

 

"Did she tell you she was alright?"

 

"Yes."

 

"Has she done anything since this alleged incident to suggest she is incapable of handling the situation?"

 

"Well...no...but..."

 

"Well no questioning without her parents consent." Victoria stated, her arm around Vanessa protectively as she spoke to the two women. "However, I would like to take her out of school..."

 

"But there's still an hour left." 

 

"It doesn't matter. We are leaving. I'll call her mom and let her know."

 

"Well..." The principal shut down and just turned to go in her office. Mean while, the Therapist stood there looking at Victoria, understanding where Vanessa got her rudeness from. Since she was on the list of contacts, it was nothing they could do to prevent her from taking Vanessa.

 

 

~                                                                                                                   ~

 

"Why couldn't you be my mom?" Vanessa inquired as she stepped into Victoria's vehicle. The gray vehicle was spotless on the inside. 

 

"I couldn't put up with your dad for one minute, let a lone fifteen years, Vanessa."

 

"I know but you are so much more fun than mom."

 

Victoria laughed, "Don't hold it against her, she was born that way."

 

"She sucks the fun out of everything. She's a fun sucker." Vanessa stated.

 

"She loves you Vanessa, you should be happy about that."

 

"She is weird, ok. I've never met a person so dry before, you know?"

 

Victoria pulled the vehicle over to the shoulder of the road, "Look, if you are going to kick it with me today, you can't talk about your mom like that. She's not a bad woman and she would give her life for one of you kids. If she had to take a bullet, she'd eat the hell out of it. Not to mention how much she's given just to stay home with you."

Vanessa shrugged, "She's still dry."

 

"A mother's purpose is to be dry. A mother isn't supposed to be bestfriends with her daughter. Then she'd be irresponsible. When you get grown your relationship with your mother will evolve into respect, mutual respect. Right now she's the dryest of dryest." 

 

Vanessa laughed, "Dryest of dry? Funny. It's her fault Tommy got Tamarah pregnant."

 

Victoria's brows lifted, "What?"

 

"Mom said I couldn't go to the party and because of that, they ended up sleeping together. It was supposed to be me and him at that party, not Tamarah."

 

"So instead of her being pregnant it would have been you?" 

 

"No, I would have used condoms." 

 

Victoria felt her stomach get nauseas. "Condoms...V, girl, you are too damn young for sex."

 

Vanessa folded her arms, "I think I could handle it."

 

"Oh really?"

 

"Yeah, I mean, I wasn't going to do it with just anybody, only Tommy."

 

Victoria glanced at her neice, "What are you talking about?"

 

"I had plannned to be with him that night, ok, but mom...she..." Tears welled up in Vanessa's eyes and she began to cry again. She'd never cried so much in her life. 

 

"Vanessa love..." Victoria sighed and ran her hand over her neice's hair, "Your mom spared you hun."

 

"No she didn't. I became the laughing stock of the school. Not just that but everybody feels sorry for me and...Tommy..."

 

"Tommy what?"

 

"I hate him. I hate him for what he did. Just because she's skinny and pretty and have long..."

 

"Wait a minute...wait a minute...How did he and Tamarah end up sleeping together?"

 

"The party...that night..." Vanessa sniffled, tears heavily running down her eye lids..."They went to the party, ate gello shots and slept together, that's how."

 

"So they got drunk?" 

 

"Yeah, I mean, I don't even know what a jello shot is but they slept together after eating it.."

 

"Jello shots is when you mix alcahol, water and gello together and let it chill in the fridge til solid."

 

"Oh."

 

"So they slept together after gello shots?" 

 

"Yeah."

 

"So then what happened wasn't intentionally?"

 

"I don't care, it was done." Vanessa bit her lip, trying to push back the tide of anger that wanted to errupt.

 

"Vanessa, you and Tamarah have been best friends since what..second grade or something?"

 

"Yeah, so."

 

"So you know her better than anyone else. Would she ever sleep with your guy intentionally? Would she have done it sober?"

 

Vanessa crossed her arms. "That doesn't matter. She did it and that's wrong."

 

"Were you in love with this guy Vanessa?"

 

"What?"

 

"Were you in love with him? Can't eat, can't breathe, can't sleep? You know that weird love your parents have."

 

Vanessa squinched her brows disgusted, "That will never happen to me, that's gross."

 

Victoria sighed, "Then how can you say you were ready for sex if it's not that kind of love? What made you want to have sex with him?"

 

Vanessa smiled, "Have you seen him Auntie, he's fine."

 

Victoria hid the smirk that tried to come to her face. "So why are you upset with that? He's not the finest guy in town and to top it all off you don't even love him, you probably get all these stupid feelings when he touches you, but that's it. How often do you think about him?"

 

"Since what happened, I can't stop thinking about him."

 

"But it's not because you are miserable without him?" 

 

"I could actually shoot him right between the eyes for what he did." 

 

Victoria sighed, "Wow, you are violent. How can you say those things and be as upset as you are? You mad because she got him before you could?" 

 

Vanessa cheeks flushed and a deep red developed within them. Victoroia laughed, "Oh, my God. Vanessa, you are a fast bugger. I'm gonna tell your parents they created a seriously sexually repressed young lady."

 

"Aunt Vanessa, come on, why you gotta say it like that?"

 

"Cause it's true. I need to have a talk with De-De."

 

"Look, I can't help feeling like that. I wish it would go away but it won't. I just can't help but feel angry."

 

"When it's your time, I'm sure it will happen and when it does, you'll be happy that you didn't give it up to Tommy no matter how fine he is. By then, it'll be was."

 

"Look, Auntie, please don't tell mom about this talk ok. She'd kill me if she knew."

 

"The only way this convo won't get out is if you promise me that you won't have sex until you're over eighteen." 

 

Vanessa's eyes widened, "What?" 

 

"Yep, that's the deal, no nookie til you are at least eighteen."

 

Vanessa's mouth dropped open, "So I can't see what it feels like?" 

 

"No. Not until your eighteenth birthday." Victoria held out her pinky finger to her, "Pinky promise. I'm serious. I promise you if I hear about you thinking about that again, this whole conversation is going to your parents and you know your mom will kill you, if your dad don't do it first."

 

"Dad would never kill me, I'm his angel."

 

Victoria laughed, "That's what you think. Talk to him about sex and he'll bury you right where you stand."

 

"They had sex at seventeen."

 

"Older than fourteen and I'm not even going to drudge that up. They are together and married, now so what they did as teenagers is none of your concern."

 

"Come on Aunt Vicki, what if I waited til seventeen?"

 

"Eighteen."

 

"Three and a half years."

 

"You'll be turning fifteen this year, half down, three to go. Now pinky promise."

 

Vanessa could feel her body burning as she wrapped her pinky finger around her aunt's. "I don't like you." 

 

Victoria placed a kiss on her forehead and smiled, "It's for the best." As they sealed this deal, Victoria had no worries. Vanessa was more like her mother than she knew. One of the things she'd gotten from her was her reluctance to break promises. It would be difficult for her to break this one, especially when it was with her Aunt. Victoria had a persuasion with her that her mother didn't. As they finished up the conversation, her phone rang. 

 

"What are you doing with my daughter?" Her sister inquired.

 

"Cranky much? I got called to the school."

 

A sigh was heard as Densie's sleepiness was heard in her tone. "Why? I'm home."

 

"Yeah you are and you didn't answer. You nor Jordan, so I was called."

 

"Well, what happened?"

 

"I'll tell you when I bring her home."

 

Another yawn was heard, "You can bring her home. I..." Her voice trailed off.

 

"I'll keep her for a few hours sleeping beauty. Take care of my nephew or neice."

 

Nothing except snoring was heard on the other line. Victoria cut off the line and started the car. "Ok, Vanessa, where would you like to go?"

 

"Shopping."

 

Victoria laughed, "Shop aholic, you probably got more clothes than your mama."

 

Chapter Seventeen

 Denise stopped by Tamarah's house after the young lady had gotten out of school for the day to check up on her. "Hi Mrs Williams.how are you?" She greeted politely although her voice wasn't resonating a smile. "Hi Tamarah I just wanted to see how you are."

"I'm as fine as I can be considering the circumstances." 

"How is Angela?" Denise inquired.

"Doing what she does best. Working."

Denise sighed. Oh. Does she know about the baby?"

Tamarah shrugged, " Would you like to come in?"

 "If that's alright with you." Denise smiled as she entered the home. " I've always admired your mother's taste. She stated while going to sit on the plush sofa facing the large flat-screen on the wall. Tamarah gave her a small smile. "I would trade all of this for a mother who was home sometime. It's like she is here in name only." 

 

"How often are you here alone?"

 

Tamarah sighed, " Too often. I wish there was someone I could talk to, go some place where I matter." 

 

" Tamarah, you have so much in your life to be grateful for."

 

"Sure I suppose. I told my mom I was pregnant and she really didn't want to hear it."

 

"That sucks. I just wanted you to know that if youu need anything or anyone to talk to, I'm here and willing to communicate."

 

Tamarah gave a small smile, "Even after you know your daughter's boyfriend is the one who got me pregnant?"

 

Denise cleared her throat. "To be honest, Tamarah, we told Vanessa that boy wasn't any good. He was a slacker, always putting everything on her. I also think he watched her alot more than she knew."

 

Tamarah furrowed her brows, "Tommy? No, he's more concerned with what it looks like to others and himself than he is with her. He's a very shallow guy."

 

"Covetous, yes, shallow, no."

 

"Covetous? How's that when they were dating."

 

"I bet he got jealous when ever any guy came up to talk to her, didn't he?"

 

"Vanessa's never had guys approaching her."

 

"you don't think he had anything to do with that?"

 

Tamarah shook her head, "I don't know."

 

"Trust me, I was a teenager once, and I had a boyfriend that terrorized the whole school."

 

"I thought Mr. Williams was the only man you'd ever been with?"

 

Denise smiled, "In many ways yes, but he wasn't my first boyfriend. I dated a guy that was abusive and Tommy exhue the same characteristics he did."

 

Tamarah laughed, "Trust me Mrs. Williams, Tommy would never hit Vanessa. He's not mean in that way. He may beat up some other guy over her, but he'd never lay a finger on her, she's like his golden egg, you know. Lovely to look at, but never to touch."

 

"He's still not good for her."

 

Tamarah sighed, "Yeah, I can picture him stalking her, maybe begging her to be with him but not physically assaulting her. He adores her very much. In many ways similar to the way Mr. Williams adore you."

 

Denise shook her head no. "My husband would never sleep with my bestfriend, or get her pregnant. Matter of fact, he wouldn't dare look at another woman the way he does me."

 

Tamarah furrowed her brows, "You sure about that?"

 

Denise smiled, unflinching, "Yes, Jordan loves me way too much for that. He's not like that."

 

"...That must be nice." Tamarah sighed, wistfully. Just then, the door opened and Angela Grey entered the house.

 

 "Hi Tamarah." Her mother greeted. 

 

"Hi mom.Mrs..." Tamarah started, but her mother, interrupted her as she hung her purse on the coat rack near the front door. "You and I need to talk. We need to discuss the little doopsie you got yourself into." 

 

"Mom, Mrs...."

 

"i know you aren't going to like what I have to say, but it's crucial that you look at your future." Angela continued, taking off her purple pumps and placing them in the small cubicle area next to the kitchen, where she kept her most recent shoes. That night, she'd take them upstairs as usual and place them in her closet. 

 

"Mom, please..." Tamarah started again. However, Mrs. Grey was not trying to listen, she kept on with her spill. "Tamarah you have your whole life ahead of you..."

 

"Mrs. Grey, I believe your daughter is trying to let you know that you have a visitor." Denise stated, her voice strong and loud. Angela turned from her position near the fridge, where she'd been about to open it and looked over at Mrs. Williams, who stared back at her, her long hair pulled into a pony tail, her dark skin flawless and free of makeup.

 

Her eyes were dark and irritated as she glanced up at Angela. Angela's face broke out into a smile, "Mrs. Williams. Oh, my I didn't realize that you were here." As she walked up to her Angela thought she could stand to use a little lipstick and hairstyle to help with her appearance.

 

She couldn't believe she'd stepped out the house the way she had, dressed in a pair of cooloxs short and matching shirt. It was such an out dated fashion.

 

Angela sighed, "Hello, Mrs. Williams, I didn't see you there. What do we owe this visit too?" 

 

"I just came over to give Tamarah some encouragement. Considering her predicament." Denise stated.

 

"Encouragement? How can you encourage a teenage pregnancy Mrs. Williams? If she were your daughter, would you be so studious regarding something conceived so foolhardy?" 

 

Denise raised a brow. "Angela, I'm sure that you were a teenager before. You know this is a period of learning and growth. Tamarah had not been thinking clearly. Teenagers make mistakes."

 

Angela's head tiled upward, as she crossed her arms over one another and her gaze condescending to Tamarah. "As a teenager, I would never have engaged in the behaviors that she'd involved herself in. Getting drunk at parties and sleeping around. I had better sense than that." 

 

Tamarah's lips trembled as she struggled to keep the tears from falling down her face. 

 

Denise's anger got the best of her and she found herself booming her next response, "How dare you talk to your daughter like that. She needs your help, not your criticism. She's only fourteen and she's pregnant with your grand child."

 

"This is not my grand child. Tamarah's not having a baby. Not until she's older."

 

"What?" Denise inquired, "That's such a shallow thing to say."

 

Angela went to Tamarah, "I booked you an appointment at the Marshall Hall Clinic, for tomorrow. We are going in there together."

 

"Mom..."

 

"Tamarah...."

 

"Look, I really..." Tamarah paused. Not sure what she was trying to say. Feeling a headache come on, she covered her face with her hand. "I..I...I gotta go." With that, she grabbed her purse and walked toward the front door. 

 

"Tamarah, where are you going?"

 

"I need to think. I'll be back a little later." She stated, opening the front door, making her exit.

 

As the door closed, Denise turned back to Angela. "Look, Angela, do you think it's necessary to take Tamarah to a clinic?"

 

"Yes, I do. There's no way, I'm going to let her become a mother at fourteen, nor am I becoming a grand parent. It's absolutely absurd." 

"Angela,  Don't you think you're being a little hasty?"

 

Angela cleared her throat, "Denise. I appreciate your concerns, but the decision is final. I've made up my mind."

 

Denise sighed, glancing up at Angela, "You should show Tamarah some type of care. Support."

 

Angela who was becoming overly irritated being challenged sucked in a deep breath. Going to the front door, she opened it. "Thank you Mrs. Williams for your visit."

 

Denise licked her lips. Picking her purse up, with the car keys attached to a zipper pocket,  she sighed, " Please Angie from one mother to another, perhaps you should think more of the situation before deciding it's out come."

 

Angela cleared her throat. " Denise I know that we have known each other for years, but you have no say over what's best for my child." 

 

Denise sighed and nodded her head. " You're right." Without saying another word she walked out the door and down the hall. 

 

 

 

 

 

Chapter Eighteen

 Vanessa POV:

 

 

Great things come to those who wait!

 

I rolled my eyes at this lame fortune cookie, threw the paper in the trash and slipped my fork into the pork dumplings on my plate. Tonight was Chinese night at aunt Vicki's house. It seemed that having left school early had it's perks. One was that my mother allowed me to stay at Aunt Vicki's for the night because she'd had another Dr. Appointment. It seemed like being pregnant meant you had to stay at the doctor's office more than you stayed at home. Children would be added to my do not list. "Vanessa are you enjoying your meal?"

 

Aunt Vicki inquired as we sat at the dinner table eating our food. I sighed, "Yes, it's delicious, except the lame fortune cookie."

 

Aunt Vicki laughed, "I hear you on that one. I don't know why The Fang insist on americanizing their products. It's kind of like a defiant of culture."

 

I sighed with a smile,  "Not necessarily, remember the Choos are third generation americans so it's understandable how they would adapt certain cultural habits."

 

Aunt Vicki laughed, "I suppose so, but that's not what I want to talk about right now."

 

"No?" I inquired.

 

She shook her head no, her beautiful eyes staring back at me. "What I want to talk about is, your mother."

 

I wrinkled my nose, partially confused, "Why?"

 

"She's pregnant."

 

I raised a brow and nodded my head in agreement. "Yeah."

 

"I want to know how you feel about that."

 

I furrowed my brows, "Didn't you tell me if I couldn't say anything nice, don't say anything at all?"

 

She nodded, "Yes, but this grass hopper, is the exception to the rule."

 

I laughed at this, shaking my head. "Well, I for one thinks it sucks."

 

"Why's that?"

 

"Because it just does, ok. It's disgusting."  I pouted, crossing my hands over eachother, sitting them on my lap."

 

"Why's that?"

 

"Because it just is. They are way too old to be having kids. Me and Craig are a decade older than the one their having, that's retarded. Who decides to have a child when your oldest is three years from her high school graduation date?"

 

"They're married Vanessa. A baby can be produced at any time."

 

"Yeah, but at the wrong time? Seriously? It's embarrassing to think that my mom and my ex bestfriend will be having a baby at the same time. Do you know how-excuse my french-fucked up that is?"

 

My aunt shook her head, "Hon, you are way too old to be thinking in such a childish way."

 

I flickered my gaze to her, "Childish? How am I being childish?"

 

"While I can understand the confusion you have regarding your mother and friend both being pregnant at the same time, however, to expect that you and your brother be the only two children they have, is blatantly childish."

 

"It's not the fact that we'd be the only two but why wait til we are so much older. I mean Craig will be eleven this year, going to the sixth grade. Why have a baby now? No one will be there with it. I know I won't. I'll be fifteen this year."

 

Vicki sighed, "How do you know God hasn't planned things this way?"

 

I folded my arms in defiance. "How do you know that he has?"

 

"Because if he hadn't, it wouldn't be so."

 

I cleared my throat, "I'd expect this from Kalen or Timothy, but not a woman who's never stepped foot inside a church."  

 

 

"You don't have to go to church to believe in God. The world itself is proof of his existence."

 

"If you say so auntie. I still think they could have had this baby way before now. I mean why wait til we are old enough to leave?"

Aunt Vicki licked her lips. "Maybe this one wasn't planned on their end." I shrugged, "maybe." As I thought of this my mind went to my former best friend. I hope her baby die. I wish she had a miscarriage or abortion or what ever because she didn't deserve a baby.  Sighing, I ran my hands through my hair. God, I hated her so much. 

 

"It's not the end of the world Vanessa." 

 

I shrugged my shoulders again. It sure felt like it.

 

Chapter Nineteen

   Timothy tried to keep his mind on the bible study lesson he was preparing for youth night but couldn't concentrate on the subject he'd begun because his heart was on Tamarah. He couldn't keep her out of it.  Sighing, he closed the book and grabbed a bottle of water in the mini fridge next to his wall and made his way to the front door.

" Dinner is at seven.", his mother stated while chopping vegetables on a chopping board. Timothy nodded his head in understanding as he pulled open the kitchen door to walk through it. 

--------------

 

Tamarah crossed the yard to his house, reached toward the door to knock but paused. He probably was too busy to talk. Sighing she pulled her hand back to turn away but the door opened and she was face to face with the very person of her thoughts. Furrowing her brows at him she stated, "This is interesting." He stood there staring at her, her eyes connecting  to his. "What's wrong?"

He inquired. Tamarah slid her hand over her hair while tears gathered in her eyes. " Mom is taking me to the clinic tomorrow." 

"That's good Tamarah , you get to do what you wanted. Tamarah cleared her throat, "Well...I'm not sure." 

"What do you mean?" Timothy was confused. Earlier that day he was sure she'd wanted an abortion.

"Well, I felt different just hearing her say it, it was like she was disgusted with me."

Timothy furrowed his brows. "Disgusted?"

"Like I repulsed her."

Timothy slipped his hand in hers, feeling the pain running through her. "Love, it's alright." 

She shook her head,  "No, it's not. My own mother wants me to abort because she doesn't want to be a grandmother."

"Tamarah, I'm not understanding what the issue is here. You said yourself that you most likely wouldn't keep it."

Tamarah, shrugged,  "Yeah, but when she came through the door, she didn't ask me what I wanted, just told me what I was going to do."

Timothy cleared his throat, "I see. So you are upset that she didn't ask you first?"

Tamarah nodded her head, "I'm able to make my own decisions."

Tamarah, you're a minor, not an adult."

"It doesn't mean I'm not able to make my own decisions." Tamarah crossed her arms difiantly. Timothy sighed, "It does if your mom says you are."

Tamarah narrowed her eyes, "In the state of Virginia, it's legal for me to decide whether I want to keep my baby or not."

Timothy put his hand up to his head confused, "Tamarah, you need to talk to someone else about this. I don't know how to help you on this situation."

Tamarah looked up at him. "I just know I can't talk to my mom."

"What about the school counselor?" He suggested.

"I don't feel comfortable talking to them there."

"What about a pastor? Aunt, Uncle, Cousin, Anybody but me Tamarah."

Tamarah began to think and think  until she gave up, almost ready to leave.

Timothy cleared his throat,  "What about my mom?"

 Tamarah shook her head, "You're mom hates me. I don't think she'll even talk to me."

 

"That's not true." Timothy deflected the comment. "My mom just is a stickler when it comes to sex outside of marriage. I bet if I asked her she would help you."

 

Tamarah sighed, frustrated, putting her hand on her forehead, " This sucks, I never intended for this to happen."

 

"I know." Timothy stated, unaware that his hand had gone to caressing her back in a comforting fashion. "It still helps to talk to someone about it."

 

"Tamarah sighed, indicisively, "I don't know.

 

"Would you prefer talking to my pastor?" He asked, running out of options. Tamarah licked her lips, thinking if she talked to a pastor that would be more embarassing because he was a guy. After contemplating, her decision was made. "I would rather talk to your mom."

"She can go over with you what your options are. She used to be a social worker. Maybe she has contacts."

Tamarah shrugged, "Thanks." As she prepared herself to leave, Timothy stopped her, "What are you going to do about your appointment tomorrow?"

Tamarah shrugged, "I don't know. I'll go but I'm going to make sure it's loud and clear I'd like some time to think about it."

 

~                                                                                                             ~

 

Jordan shook Franklin, the detective working on Gina Harrelson's case, hand and allowed him entrance into his office.

"What you got for me Frankie."

"Well, this is going to surprise you.'

"What's that."

 "Your little sultry woman was telling the truth." Frankie put the files down on Jordan's desk. "Yeah?"

"Yes, there were plenty of witnesses to what transpired between her and Olier. Several different ocassions."

Jordan nodded, "Alright, thanks Frankie." 

 

Frankie smiled at him, "How's that beautiful wife of yours?" 

 

Jordan smiled, "She's great. A little tired lately."

 

"Yeah, that's usually what happens when a woman is with child."

 

"Twins, Frankie." 

Frankie glanced up from the file in his hand, "Twins?" 

Jordan nodded, his posture a little stiff.

Frankie immediately went to the office bar, and pulled out a bottle of Brandy and two small shots. Putting the glasses on Jordan's desk, he poured a sip of the brown wine. Holding it up to him, he said, " Congratulations my brother." Jordan sighed, grabbed the glass, clinked it against his and said, "Thanks." Without taking a swig, he set the glass down and watched as Frankie downed his. Frankie set the empty glass next to his. "What's wrong man?" 

 

Jordan sighed, "I was looking forward to the two we have graduating school and going off to college. With two more on the way, that's going to make the vacations, traveling and sporadic love making practically none existent."

 

Frankie furrowed his brows, "I doubt it man, you and Denise still get down with the best of them. It doesn't seem like marriage have dulled your love for one another."

 

Jordan sighed, "You're right, it hasn't. I love her more and more everyday and she's an atomic bomb in the bedroom, but...when those two come along, that's going to be the last thing on her mind. Last time Craig was born, it was a whole year before she and I were able to be intimate and another two before we had alone time. The sex didn't start increasing until Craig was old enough to go to school. It was like she had us on this damn schedule and boy did arguments ensue. Finally it got to a point where one night I was so frustrated with everything I just through out the schedule and did all I could do to not rip off her clothes."

 

Frankie nodded, his cheeks slightly rosy. "Well, it was obviously worth the wait."

 

Jordan swallowed, "It was but do you know that during that whole time, I almost cheated on her with atleast three different women."

 

"Adrienne Winters, Deb Nicholson and Juliette Burges, right?"

 

Jordan narrowed his eyes, "How'd you know?"

 

Frankie sighed, "For one, I work with Adrienne and I was trying to get a hold of her the night she came up here to brief you on the Davenport Case."

 

Jordan put his hands over his eyes as if that would erase the beautiful chocolate girl from his mind. She'd been a slender yet curvaceous woman with long beautiful hair that went passed her shoulders. Her heart shaped lips, tough exterior and no nonsense attitude had made Her extremely attractive to him.

 

He had a serious weakness for dark skin.

 

One of the things that had attracted him to his wife and kept him attracted was the dark Hershey skin tone she kept shiny with various oils. Her skin was smooth as silk, edible and beautiful through and through. He got lost on many occasions in the luscious sweet scent.  How her skin contrasted to his was an outright addiction when she lay entangled with him. Especially when her hair was in a natural fro.

 

The blood that pumped through his chest, causing his breath to stick in his throat, drove him crazy with need, as he envisioned his wife, his heart swelled at the deep connection they had built. She was his anchor and he was her rock. As he thought of his wife he knew he'd spend 30 more years with her. There was no woman on this earth worth trading her in for. She'd given him every part of her from her body to her heart, soul and mind. It was all joined to him. Just as all of him belonged to her. 

 

She was  the only person he loved more than himself. The only woman who could get under his skin, to the depths of his soul. As he thought this, his mind went to Vanessa. His daughter had a place unrivalled in his heart as well. Although he loved Craig, he related more to Vanessa who had characteristics of both him and her mother. Tough as nails like her mother but she had his heart. When she loved she loved. All it took was one betrayal and he'd never look at you the same way again. Jordan knew that when Vanessa fell in love she was going to become more like him but until then she acted as her mother. only he saw her soft side which mirrored his. 

 

Turning his attention back to Franklin, he grabbed a notepad from his desk, asking for the names of the individuals who claimed to have witnessed Gina being sexually harassed by Mr. Olier. After getting the names he asked Franklin if three was anything else he needed to add to the information he'd already received. "For now that's all. However just know that I will be keeping an eye on both parties just to make sure there is no scheming involved." 

 

Jordan sighed, understanding full well the meaning behind his approach. he didn't trust either individuals involved and felt it crucial to keep an eye out. He knew Franklin long enough to know how he operated. 

 

-----

 

Gina Harrelson flicked her tongue over her teeth as she opened the tube of Candy red lipstick.

 

"Gina I don't think you should do this." Her roommate Maya Tucker stated as she watched her in the mirror with light hazel colored nervous eyes.

 

"Why not?"

 

"He's married with children." 

 

"He's also quite wealthy. Should he and his wife divorce she Will be well taken care of."

 

"How do you know that he will leave her for you?" 

Gina smiled, "I don't, but it will be quite fun tempting him to. Men like him can't stand to see a woman in distress."

 

"You should have respect for his wife and kids."

 

Gina sighed," he should be considering them, not me  I'm not married."

 

"Are you going to do him like you did Mr Olier?"

Patting her hair Gina shrugged. "I didn't do anything to Mr Olier. He did everything of his own accord."

 

"You wrecked his marriage."

 

Shaking her head adamantly, Gina denied her friend's accusations. "You can't wreck something that was alreadhy torn apart."

 

"They seemed to be happy Gina and you came in between that."

 

Gina rolled her eyes, sighing. "If they were really happy, he wouldn't have came on to me so strongly. I'm so sick of men who think they are entitled to women, men who think they can have any woman they want because she looks good. They, are the reason why women such as myself hate men."

 

 Maya exhaled sharply. This was the reason she refused to introduce Gina to her boyfriend. Maya and Uriel had been dating for a year and a half now and during their last anniversary, he'd requested that she make the move with him to Oregan, after he'd gotten a promotion with V tech toy company as plant manager for the store in Miles Ville Oregan. Although she'd accepted the offer, she hadn't yet revealed the information to Gina for this purpose. Gina was crazy ass fuck. 

 

Maya had known Gina since they'd both started Park View high back when they lived in South Hill. This behavior was nothing new for Gina. Gina had seduced a teacher of theirs into a sexual relationship and then after three months exposed their relationship to his wife. She had ruined a good person and seemed to be on the fast track with finding other people to screw with. She'd so far had ruined seven men and their marriages. It's like she got some sick and twisted delight out of hurting them.

 

Maya was waiting for the day when she was served just desserts. Although she'd ignored it the majority of the time they'd been around one another, now that she was serious with Uriel, the thought of Gina coming between them made her sick. That's why she couldn't bring herself to introduce him to her.

 

Maya loved Uriel more than life itself. He was the reason she was alive, litterally. Maya had struggled with depression from the age of ten after her mother died and had a difficult time forming relationships. On the day she'd been on her way to the city bridge to take that faithful leap, he'd sat down next to her. It surprised Maya that he would speak to her without being spoken too. She'd been so used to being ignored that it shocked her when he asked her what her name was. Then he'd proceeded to tell her that he noticed she'd take the bus every Thursday around that time. Maya sighed as she thought of how desperate she'd been at the time, wishing to end her less than exciting life due to sheer hurt over her mother's passing.

 

Her father who'd been a functioning alcoholic worked in one of the coal mines in a nearby town and spent the majority of his time away from home. Thus, leaving her feeling neglected and abandoned. She'd been so withdrawn and isolated mentally and emotionally that she'd been the proverbial fly on the wall during school. She kept quiet in the majority of her classes and passed through primary, secondary and college without a single soul to really. truly relate to until Uriel. 

 

As she stared at Gina, the fear the encompassed her reached to the bottom of her soul. No way, no how would Gina meet Uriel or interact with him. 

 

~

 

Denise threw the used wash cloth in the sink and uttered a sigh as she plopped herself down on a chair that was placed at the table in front of her. As she glanced around the kitchen she admired the gleam of various appliances, the bright display of checkered flooring in the kitchen and the neat presentation of every item in its proper place. Organization was definately a strong suit of hers. As she glanced at the area, her mind couldn't help but flicker back to thoughts of her daughter. She would like to offer her some type of condolance, some type of wisdom, some type of solution for her current situation, but it was not a task that came quick to her. She'd never dealt with any guy she loved cheating on her. She'd never dealt with a bestfriend who'd been the perpetrator and managed to get pregnant by her own boyfriend. She genuinely felt at loss as to what to say to her 15 year old.

 

As her mind drifted to Jordan, she knew that if there was one thing she couldn't take it was infidelity. Infidelity was a subject best not talked about because just the mere thought made her angry. She knew that would be a killer for her. Something she would never be able to accept or let go. The response to this thought unnerved her. She quickly thought about the letter she'd received from the local middle School. A meeting had been set up with James Lorhen the School principal to go over everything needed for the first day of school. 

 

She thought about how to tell her husband about the letter and how to tell him that she'd accepted the position. She knew that accepting this position would upset their "happy" life but felt it was necessary. She also knew that he would have a fit at the idea of her being pregnant and working, but the truth was, he didn't understand the lonliness she felt, the isolation associated with the fact that all she ever did was clean and quite frankly, she was tired of it. She felt as if she was more than a mother. She had found a way to express that. In such a way she knew ultimately he would have no choice but to be happy about it. Denise glanced at her watch. It was twelve noon. Nap time was calling.

 

As she was about to go to up the back stairwell to her bedroom, she heard the answering machine go off, indicating that someone was leaving a message. "Mr. Williams, this is Gina Harrelson, I'm calling to see if you heard anything back from that detective you'd hired to look into my cas. I would like to set up a meeting with you at your earliest convienence."

 

Denise felt her cheeks burn with irritation and an adrenaline rush began her thumping heart. There was something about this woman that she didn't like, something that stroked a sincere dread in the pit of her stomach. As she thought this, her body began trembling and she closed her eyes, trying to still her body into a quietness but it wouldn't work. She worked herself into such a frenzy that she picked up the phone and dialed her husband's work number.

 

~

 

Jordan was going over a document of charges he'd compiled for his previous client bill of service, when his phone rang. Glancing at it, he saw that it was Denise. A smile captured his face and heart as he picked it up

 

"Why the hell are you doing this Jordan?" Denise's voice was loud as she yelled at her husband.

Jordan's demeanor straightened and he dropped his felt tip pin on the desk. "Excuse me?" He inquired. His tone confused.

"Why did you give that girl our number. Our home phone number?"

Jordan furrowed his brows, "What girl?"

"That girlI who's case you are working on, that Gina girl "

Jordan sighed, "Stop yelling at me. What's your problem? I gave her our number in case of an emergency."

Denise's breathing was heavy over the phone as she clenched the phone in her hand. The dread she felt in her spirit was difficult to deal with, "You've never done that before, so why start now? What the hell is so special about this girl?"

Jordan could hearl the anxiety in his wife's voice.  It was so strong, it caused his heart to drop in his chest. "Denise, this is strictly work related. There's nothing going on between Ms. Harrelson and I."

"But why do you need to share personal information." Denise inquired.

"Denise, have you had a nap yet?"Jordan interjected, looking at his watch.

"Don't try to passify me Jordan, I'm not a child, you can answer my question."

"Denise you are tripping. I told you there is nothing going on between my client and I. My number is for emergencies, incase she can't get ahold of me at the office. Now you need to take your butt and go lay down."

"Jordan, I don't agree with this." Denise stated, her heart pounding harshly against her chest. If this was so innocent, why did she feel the opposite?

It was then his voice became calm yet authoritative. "Denise,  how long have we been together?"

Denise steeled herself, knowing that when he used that tone, it melted her heart and she couldn't have that. "That's besides the point. People get married everyday and one partner decides the other is boring or lacking something and then things go from there."

Jordan felt the smile in his heart before it broke through his chest and eventually found it's way past his throat and out of his mouth. "You really thought this through huh?" He leaned back and propped his feet up on the mini stool that rested beneath his deask.

Denise felt a small break in her resolve at his sweet laughter. "Of course I did." She stated.

"So one partner decides to try something new huh?"

"Well...yeah."

Jordan shook his head as he felt every part of him come alive. This woman excited him in a way no other woman could. Just a thought of her made his mind race, "Does that mean you wsh to try something new Denise?" His tone was so sultry that Denise felt a heavy fog place itself over her mind and her ability to think became irratic. "Jordan, are you trying to manipulate me?"

He inquired, "Is that what you want?"

Denise bit her lip and put her arms defiantly across her  chest. "You know what I'm talking about, Jordan. That woman has no business calling our home."

Jordan licked his lips, "Is that right?" His drool was playful yet seductive."

Denise's breathing became loud, "You're being a jerk right now Jordan. Don't try to make this anything other than what it is." She shook her head and furrowed her brows. That didn't even make sense to her.

Jordan didn't speak, he went silent. This let her know he wasn't going to entertain her thoughts. She also knew it meant he was reigning in his own form of control.

"I know you hear me Jordan." Denise stated, her tone slightly wavering.

Jordan felt the tightness that began in his chest constrict in his heart. He whispered, "I love you Denise. You know that."

Denise tried to grasp for air as her heart sped up. She tried to tell it to calm down, but it just accelerated more.
"You should be honest with me Jordan. I know you like that woman."

"She's descent but she's not you, Denise. I can live without her but not with out you."

Denise exhaled sharply, "Why do you always do this to me?"

Jordan pulled his tie loose from around his neck as he felt the tingles in his body began to slightly subside, meaning his blood pressure was turning back to normal. "Do what Denise?"

Denise closed her eyes, "This, I feel like you are constantly deflecting any topic I think is important."

"Only when you bring stupid insinuations like the one you just tried to me. You know how I feel about you Denise. Unfortunately for you I have been in love with you since we first saw each other. I don't see any other woman the way I see you."

"You say that now Jordan, but I'm telling you..."

Jordan could sense the fear underneath her words. "Denise we are going to grow old and die together. We are going to have our kids and grand kids and great grand kids together in our home."

 

"But Jordan, I'm telling you, I have a bad feeling about this girl..."

"And I'm telling you I'm not going anywhere. I don't care how beautiful or sexy another woman is, she doesn't compare to you. Do you understand that."

"But Jordan..." Denise felt her heart melt and the resolve she had broke. She couldn't explain it, but there was something different about this girl. There was something different about his behavior and all though she heard the words he spoke and understood his love for her, she couldn't help but feel like he couldn't see the forrest for the trees. The one thing about Jordan was that he was always optimistic in his love for her, always willing to over look the negative, always willing to work through their problems, no matter how big or how small, but the one thing he could never seem to grasp was when something was directly in front of his face. He couldn't see how subconsciously little by little he was compromising, but she did. Just the slightest difference was enough to speculate. "Jordan, do you trust me?"

Jordan nodded his head while answering, "What kind of question is that?"

"I know you love me Jordan and I understand you think that's all you need, but please listen to me. Be careful with that woman, ok?"

"Are you jealous of Gina, De-De?"

"She's beautiful, Jordan, too beautiful." Denise felt her heart break as she admitted this.

"Denise you are the woman I love, the woman who has my children, the woman who has my heart and soul. The woman who I would never give up ever in my life."

"That girl is crazy beautiful Jordan and even I can see that."

Jordan sighed, "You have nothing to worry about."

 

Denise sighed. If there was nothing to worry about, she wouldn't be feeling this way. There was something about that woman that showed Denise that a no would not be enough to deter her. She was like a siren and whirlwind all in one. She was not what Jordan suspected.  Jordan underestimated the prowess nature of a single woman. As she remembered the beauty in her head, Denise began to contemplate what she could do to keep Jordan with his family. She was his wife, he chose her and although he didn't know it, this woman was a neuclear threat. It made her smile at his innocense.

 

He was such a beautiful soul that he couldn't see that a war was starting to brew. Although she'd promised herself she'd never fight over a man, she understood that he was no man, he was her husband and although he tried to hide it, he was quite susceptible to beauty. He loved anything that displayed it's own sense of beauty, pride, and adoration. He didn't see the red haired girl as a threat yet but that's because she wasn't trying, but when things progressed to that point, it would be difficult for him. Denise knew what to do in this case, because when she was in her 30's she watched Garrett and her mom go through this, except Garret was the one fighting for her mother. In the end, her mom didn't leave him, not because she hadn't thought about it, but because Garret noticed the withdrawl and instead of giving up he approached the issue head on.

 

Denise went upstairs and decided that she would talk to Vicki when she picked up Vanessa today.

 

~

 

Vanessa

 

My mom was talking to Aunt Vicki and although I had no idea what about, it must have been serious because I'd gotten tired of waiting for her in the van after twenty minutes. I had prepared myself to exit and as I did she opened the door and shut it close, starting the vehicle.

"Mom, what took so long?" I inquired, buckling my seat belt as she pulled out of the drive way.

"I needed to talk to your Aunt Viki."

"About what?"

Mom glanced over at me. " A few things and among them, your departure from school today."

I rolled my eyes."Come on ma..I didn't do anything wrong. They just sent me home."

She smirked, "Sure Vanessa. They just decided to send you home."

"Well, the principal got mad because I wouldn't talk to the counselor about what's going on with Tamarah. I don't feel like it's really any of their business."

"Their trying to take control of the situation Vanessa."

"It doesn't really matter about controlling the situation because the whole school knows she and Tommy slept together." I felt my cheeks burn at this acknowledgement. They all knew but no one understood the shame and embarrassment something of this magnitude causes.

"How do you feel about that, Vanessa?"

I shrugged. " I feel like I can't really do anything about it since she's pregnant. I have to live with the embarrassment."

My mom sighed, "Would you like to enroll in a school on the other side of town?"

I rolled my eyes, "With all of those preppy kids? I'm fine right here, thank you."

"You would fit in there Vanessa. You're intelligent, bright and not to mention beautiful. They will flock to you."

I sighed and rolled my eyes, not really sure what the fuss was about. I felt like my skin was too light, my eyes drew too much attention and guys looked at my breasts and hips before anything else. It was irksome to know that all they thought of when they saw me was sex. Out side of Tommy there was no other guy I was interested in.

"Are you interested in going to another school, Vanessa?"

I exhaled, "All the way across town mom? Come on, between Dad's work schedule and your pregnancy I wouldn't want to do that. It's enough with Craig having to go to school over there."

"While everything you stated is true, it doesn't mean I wouldn't mind driving you over there, besides I received a letter from a school over there."

I turned my head to my mother. "You did?"

We made a left turn on Terrace Road. "Yes, Vanessa."

"Which one?"

 "I can't remember but I know I received one, so I'm deciding on whether or not to go back to work come the fall."

I raised my eye brows, my face suddenly morphing into a replica of my dad's when he was surpried. "You are going to work in the fall?"

My mom laughed, "Why not?"

"Hmm, I don't know, what about the baby growing inside your womb? Too much stress can't be a good thing."

My mom yawned as she turned on her left turn signal at a red light. "I find it more stressful sitting at home cleaning all day. I have a degree in History and can't even use it."

"That's because you chose to become a mother."

Mom made the turn now that the light was red, "Being a mother has nothing to do with it. Your father and I agreed that once you and Craig started school that I would go back to work."

"You're pregnant again."

"And that shouldn't stop me from accomplishing my goals."

"Mom Dad's practice is doing well now."

"I know, all the more for me to get out of the house."

"What about dinner? You and dad will probably start fighting now."

She shook her head, "Why's that? Because I will finally have something to do other than take  care of you guys?"

I rolled my eyes. "Mom you act like that's a bad thing."

"No it's not, but i should be able to do something I enjoy doing."

"And teaching is it?" I sighed frustrated. 

"Vanessa, I understand that you won't have your mother to pick up after you all the time, cook dinner every single night and be at your beck and call like usual, but seriously, it's time you start filling in your own place. It's time for you guys to grow up and learn to care for yourselves. Don't always depend on me for everything."

"And you getting a job will help us do that?" I felt angry and anxious now without understanding why. 

"Yes." Mom turned onto the road we lived on and pulled into the drive way at the end of the block. I threw my hands up, "Whatever." She turned the key to the off position and I opened my door. "I have home work."

"Vanessa, it's for the best."

I cleared my throat and said, "I'm sure it is mom. I hope you have a good night." As i grabbed my bag from the floor of the car, I grabbed the door with the other hand. Slipping the bag over my shoulder, I closed the door and made my way to the front door. I really didn't feel like talking with her about this. 

 

 

 

Impressum

Texte: Navaura Campbell, Brandy M.
Lektorat: Brandy
Tag der Veröffentlichung: 15.02.2013

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Widmung:
To those who have loved, lost and triumphed over despair. I hope that you find this book rewarding and entertaining while at the same time giving you vestiges of hope and belief.