The begining to the end.

LA little girl whimpers in the night. A man hushs her, promises her nothing will hurt her if she is quiet an holds still. A tear rolls down her face. It won't hurt, the man says again, only make her feel good. The little girl shakes her head no, she already hurts and feels pain. The man has lied already once to her. He doesnt care about her, only about hurting her and making her cry. The man smiles wickedly as he roughly wipes the tears from her face. He made her undress all the way to her princess panties and now was pinning her down kissing and licking all over her little 7 year old body. She didn't understand then and probably never will.

That was when Jamie woke up. Covered with sweat and breathing hard. The same dream that was a memory. Still as fresh as when it happened to her. She looked around her dark room and hugged her knees to her chest. The shadows in the room felt as if they were lurking, hiding what shouldn't be hidden. As Jamie tried to even her breathing she stepped over to her window looking out at the stars and that was when she saw him. Her neighboor. Jamie and her family had only lived here in this house a short while. She had met the one nine year old boy from next door, but she didn't know he had an older brother. Closing her curtain and picking up her phone she text one of the boys she had met earlier in the week. Wanting desperately to forget her dream. And forget this new stranger she was suddenly so curious about.

His answer was almost instant and Jamie quietly left her house to go to him, unaware of the boy next door watching her go from his window. He had seen Jamie before around the neighboorhood, and he had certainly heard of her. She was the one they all talked about. The girl the guys went to. The girl the other girls hated, Jamie was beautiful, but there was something off about her that made Declan keep his distance from her. He didn't understand her, he didn't know if he wanted to just yet. Declan left the window and laid down on his bed unable to get her out of his head. He sure as hell didn't want her there. It wouldn't help anybody if she was there.

It was fast, quick, and over. He held her for a minute before she left feeling empty, used, and useless. As Jamie walked home she talked to God, praying he was listening. "I don't know why i do these things, i honestly don't. I just want to know what it feels like to be wanted, to be loved. Is that really so wrong?" She silently cried to herself not even wanting to go home and face another day. It was too hard and she felt like she was nothing, and had nobody to care anymore. Why bother then? What was the point?

As soon as he woke he knew it was time. His stomache twisted in knots and his head pounding he walked to his dresser and pulled out the joint he had rolled right before he went to bed. This was his ritual. He walked lazily outside to his backyard and lit up. As he smoked he thought of her. Jamie. She was a lost cause to Declan. He didn"t even try to understand her. Letting her slip out of his mind and let his high take her spot as he closed his eyes an dozed off.

"Declan." It was only his name, but somehow seeing and hearing it come from her mouth sent chills threw him. He has to be dreaming, was all that he could think about. There just was no logical reason she would talk to him. Not without him saying hi first. But what the heck right? Might as well enjoy this dream.

"Jamie?" It wasn't supposed to sound like a question. Her beautiful face twisted and then there it was, a smile. It knocked his breath away when he saw it. And even when he woke up in his yard, it was all he could see. He had to see it in person. He just had to.

After all her chores for the day were done, jamie was getting ready for a run when she saw the neighboor boy leaving his house. Jamie couldnt keep her thoughts away from the dream she had about him the night before. He was there, he was holding her, only holding her and she watched the loving look he gave her as he whispered in her ear, always and forever. She hadnt been able to shake that dream all day. Jamie wasnt sure yet if it was a good thing or a bad thing. Shaking her head, and those thoughts, jamie laced her high tops qnd set out. Running was the only real thing jamie ever did alone. It was the only thing her mother let her do alone that is. Jamie and her mother had quite a few differences since jamie dropped out of public school. Which she didnt understand since she ended up graduating two years early instead, with a private school, but who cares?

Impressum

Texte: Katie
Tag der Veröffentlichung: 06.02.2012

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