Prologue
Prologue—
I sighed. I put him down and turned to walk away. I couldn’t believe I was leaving him. Tears gathered in my eyes and I turned around to look at him again before I left. I walked quickly back to him, kissed his forehead, and whispered in his ear, “Momma loves you baby.” I walked back to the door, and left before I changed my mind. I was anxious about leaving him for the first time in 6 weeks. He had been by my side since the day he was born, never left my sight. Not being able to see him for an entire day scared the living hell out of me. I walked down the stairs slowly enough that I could get myself together before seeing the rest of my family. I cleared my face of tears and tried to hide the fact that they were there to begin with.
Chapter One
Chapter One—
Sitting in the hospital room, I thought back on these last few days. I had gone from just a regular teenager to a mom in just two days!! I looked over to the little body in the plastic bin beside my bed. He was sleeping peacefully, his tiny breaths even and steady. He was mine; today he was coming home with me. I slid over and adjusted my body so that it was stable on the bed. I picked him up and cradled him in my arms, just as the nurses had taught us the day he was born. “Bradley Caleb,” I whispered, “Are you ready to go home baby?” I smiled as he stirred in my arms, awaking from his nap. “We’re going home today. You get to see your new home. Are you happy?” He opened his little eyes and yawned. I smiled looking into his eyes. I picked up his tiny hand holding it in mine. The door creaked open and Brad stepped in. I looked up and whispered to Bradley, “There’s your Daddy. There his is baby.” Brad smiled at us and walked over to us. He showed me the discharge papers in his hand. I smiled and signed them. He handed me the diaper bag and kissed me before kissing Bradley, then walked out the door to take the papers to the nurses’ station. I opened the diaper bag, took out a nursing blanket, a diaper and the wipes, and light blue footy-pajamas. I spreaded the blanket across the bed in front of me and laid Bradley on it. I unbuttoned his onesie and took it off of him. I changed his diaper and got him dressed carefully. Brad walked in with a nurse and the doctor as soon as we were done. “You’re good to go Alison. The nurse is here to tell you a few things about how to care for Bradley when he gets home and things to expect,” the doctor smiled at us, shook Brad’s hand and left. The nurse walked up to me, and began to explain what the doctor had told her to. She told us to take Bradley to the pediatrician after two weeks. He would need his shots. When she was done she smiled at me, wished us luck, and left. “I’m going to need help babe,” I told Brad. He nodded and grabbed my bag. He got out my sweatpants, t-shirt, underwear, bra, socks, sweatshirt, and Uggs. I put Bradley in his carrier and grabbed Brad’s hands so that he could help me get up from the bed.
I got dressed with Brad’s help. When we were done, I made Bradley four bottles incase he got hungry on the way home. I packed up his stuff and handed our bags to Brad. He took them and left the room to get the truck and to tell the nurse that we were ready to leave. Shortly after he left, the nurse came in with a wheelchair because I couldn’t walk all the way down to the parking lot. She pushed me while I held Bradley’s carrier in my lap. When we got down to the door where the truck was parked, Brad took the carrier and put it on the driver side of the backseat. The nurse helped me out of the wheelchair and I thanked her as I got into the truck. She smile and walked back into the hospital. I sat in the backseat with Bradley. Brad was careful while driving. “It’s different, huh?” I asked him. “He looked at me through the rear view mirror, “Yeah. It makes you alert with him in the car.” I nodded. He drove slowly. We finally got home where my mom was waiting to help us in the driveway. She had put blue balloons on the mailbox and by the door. She opened the door to where I sat and hugged me tight. She took my hands and helped me out of the truck. Mike was by my side as I walked to the steps, where he helped me up. Brad carried our son inside behind me. I walked into the living room and sat down on the couch. Brad put the baby down beside me and took him out of the carrier. He handed him to me and went to go get his swing. I cradled Bradley in my arms. Looking down on him, I studied his face trying to see who he looked like. I saw my eyes, Brad’s nose and mouth, my mother’s shape, and an unfamiliar touch too. I loved everything about him. He was so adorable, and he was defiantly mine. There was no denying that. He was absolutely perfect in each and every way.
My mom and Mike took turns holding him for a while. Brad chimed in to feed him every 2 hours. We looked at my parents on the other end of the couch, admiring them. They loved Bradley too. But who couldn’t? He had puffy cheeks that were irresistible, lips that were so soft and full. His eyes were the most beautiful thing on him. He had dark, sparkling green eyes that he had gotten honestly from me. They matched, exactly. Brad wrapped me in his arms as we sat on the couch. He kissed my forehead and ran his fingers through my hair. My mom, talking to Bradley, brought him over and placed him in my arms. “Hey there buddy,” I said to him. I grabbed his little hand and he wrapped his fingers around my index fingers. I smiled at him.
Chapter Two
Chapter 2—
The days flew by, then weeks, and before I knew it Bradley was a month old. Brad was going to school every day, and coming home at night, letting me sleep as much as possible. I wasn’t allowed to go back to school until Bradley was six weeks old, and I was dreading the day that it came. I was thankful for the baby monitors I had put all around the house, because I hate it when he cries. It makes me anxious and jittery when I hear it. I rush to him when he cries during the night. He rarely gets put down at all during the day. I constantly hold him. My mom has to remind me to put him in the swing every once in a while, so that he doesn’t get too used to it. Nicole comes over at least 4 times during the week to see Bradley and me. My mother thinks that I should call my dad and tell him about his grandson but I refuse. I’ve never met the man. What would I say to him if I did call him? Hey dad, it’s me, your daughter that you never met? I didn’t want to. But she thinks that I should do it anyways. Mike works during the day and my mom works at night. Brad stays with us most nights and I like that. My mom doesn’t mind, as long as everything stays clean. I rarely get dressed at all, only when I have to take Bradley somewhere. I stay home all day, take care of Bradley, take a shower when Mike gets home, and take care of Bradley until he goes to sleep.
As I was feeding Bradley his last bottle before I put him to bed, I thought back to his first week home. Brad and I had given him a bath, making a huge mess in the kitchen. Bradley didn’t like taking bathes. He cried the entire time we had him in the sink. When he finally stopped crying, I thought I’d never want to give him a bath ever again. I just let my mom, Mike, or Brad do it. I can’t stand making him cry. I giggled to myself as I burped Bradley gently. I laid him back in my lap, propping his head up on a nursery blanket, and gave him his bottle. Brad reached for him from my lap, and took him to the nursery to finish his bottle, change his diaper, and put him to bed. I kissed Bradley on the head as we approached the door to his room. I went off into our room and climbed in on my side of the bed. I stretched out widely and slid over to give Brad room. About fifteen minutes passed and I was nearly asleep when I heard Brad climb into his side of the bed. He turned over to face me and wrapped me into his arms, kissing me softly. His hands wondered across my back. I pulled my face back from his, looking into his eyes and said, “I love you babe.” He brushed back the hair that had fallen into my face. “I love you too,” he said. He kissed my forehead, and lay back down. I fell asleep quickly. I was awaken four times during the night by Bradley, and scurried to comfort him as he cried. I had made bottles before going to bed, and was grateful that I did. It took less time for me to feed him and go back to sleep. The next two weeks flew by, and before I knew it, I had school the next day. I was so anxious. I didn’t want to leave my baby boy. I wasn’t sure how to. Would he be alright without me? The day passed fast and as each hour passed I became even more nervous. I didn’t put Bradley down all day. He slept in our bed for the first time. I was determined to spend every second with him until I couldn’t.
Chapter Three
Chapter 3—
When morning came, I was a disaster. I walked around the house trying to get ready with Bradley in my arms. I didn’t want anyone else to hold him until I left. I didn’t care about what I was wearing or what my hair looked like. I pulled it up into a messy bun, put some sweatpants on with a t-shirt and my Uggs, and carried Bradley into the nursery as he finished his bottle. I walked into the nursery and stopped by the crib. I sighed. I put him down and turned to walk away. I couldn’t believe I was leaving him. Tears gathered in my eyes and I turned around to look at him again before I left. I walked quickly back to him, kissed his forehead, and whispered in his ear, “Momma loves you baby.” I walked back to the door, and left before I changed my mind. I was anxious about leaving him for the first time in 6 weeks. He had been by my side since the day he was born, never left my sight. Not being able to see him for an entire day scared the living hell out of me. I walked down the stairs slowly enough that I could get myself together before seeing the rest of my family. I cleared my face of tears and tried to hide the fact that they were there to begin with.
I walked slowly into the kitchen where Brad was waiting for me. He took my hands and pulled me into a hug. He saw straight through my masked face. I began to sob and ramble about Bradley. I didn’t want to leave him. “I’ll call the school, baby. I’ll take care of it honey,” Brad picked up the house phone. I walked back upstairs into Bradley’s room where he was laying in his crib looking up at the mobile above his crib. I picked him up and sat into the rocking chair with him. We sat there for about 10 minutes before Brad came up the stairs. “Get him dressed,” he said with a smile. I was confused. Why would I get him dressed? “I talked to the principle. She understands what is going on, and she said that you could bring him for your first week back.” I smiled at him and looked down at Bradley. I stood up and but him on the changing table. I pulled out a pair of jeans, an “I love Daddy” t-shirt, socks, and a camouflage sweatshirt. I changed his diaper and got him dressed quickly. I packed his diaper bag up, put his shoes on him, and put him in his carrier. I pulled up the hood on the carrier and went down the stairs. Brad had already put my stuff in the car, and all I had to do was put Bradley in. I strapped the carrier in the backseat. I got into the driver’s side, put on my seatbelt, and slowly backed the car out of the driveway. I slowly drove us to the school and parked close to the building, like I had done when I first arrived. I cut the engine and got up out of the car. I opened the back door and took my son’s carrier out. I put him down on the parking lot for a moment to grab my bookbag, and picked him up to walk in the door. Nicole nearly attacked me when she saw us walk through the door. She insisted on taking Bradley out of the carrier and Brad took the carrier from me, taking it to the office. I kissed him and told him that we would see him at lunch. Nicole, Bradley, and I walked to my first period class. I showed Mr. Anderson the letter from the principle allowing Bradley to be with me. He smiled and nodded at me. I went to sit down where Nicole was sitting with Bradley. Everyone turned around to look at him. Almost everyone spoke to him. He smiled at all of the people making faces of adoration at him.
By lunch, I was tired. This was more than I had done since Bradley was born. It was weird. I never got any time alone with Bradley, but he didn’t cry all day. I was happy about that, because I didn’t have any anxiety issues in front of everyone.
Chapter Four
Chapter 4—
I was glad to leave the school when the day was over. Bradley was sleeping when the bell rang, and I walked, carefully not to wake him, slowly to the car. When I finally got to the car, I strapped in the carrier, and shut the door gently. I got into the driver’s seat, and started the car. I waited for Brad to get to the car, and as he got in, he sighed. I grabbed his hand from his lap and held it tight in mine. I leaned in and kissed him, over and over again. When I was done, he breathed on my face, and kissed me again. I began to sob when he pulled back. I slammed both hands on the steering wheel and lay my head between them. My day was so stressful, and it was all coming apart in tears. I wanted to scream, but Bradley was sleeping in the backseat so I just huffed. Brad rubbed my back. Tears fell like rain from my eyes. I hated going to school now. But, I was glad that I could take Bradley with me. I drove faster than usual with Bradley in the car. My face was wet with tears, and I felt like I was kind of acting pissed off. Except I wasn’t. I was just stressed. I didn’t like going to school anymore because I wanted to be with Bradley, but I didn’t want people to stare and talk to me all day. I wanted to throw something. Instead, I focused on the road and driving because my son was in the car. I could always just get my diploma online. It couldn’t be all that hard. At least I would be able to stay home with Bradley all day, without people in our faces all day. “Ali!!” Brad was screaming. A car had suddenly pulled into the lane that we were in. I tapped the brakes slowly, blowing the horn. My eyes were focused strictly on the road now. My mind finally stopped racing about things that I wasn’t doing. Thank God! I thought. I looked back at Bradley, still sleeping, in the backseat. It was amazing to me that he could sleep through noise, but he woke up every time his diaper was wet or hungry.
Tears were streaming down my face still. Brad took my hand in his. I huffed out air, breathing heavily. When we finally got home I took a second to get myself together. I got out and picked Bradley up from the carrier. I left everything but his diaper bag and my keys in the car. I went straight to my room with Bradley and lay on the bed, putting him on my chest. I just let the tears fall from my eyes. I wasn’t sure why I was being so emotional. I was annoyed, but I didn’t care enough. I just wanted to be alone with my family: just me, Brad, Bradley, mom, and Mike. Everyone else didn’t matter. Bradley was stirring on my chest. He was probably hungry, so I got up and cradled him in my arms. “Hey there,” I whispered to him. He looked up into my eyes. I smiled, just for him. I got up off of the bed and went to his nursery. I took out his diaper, wipes, and pajamas. I changed his diaper and got him dressed quickly. I picked him up off of the changing table and put his head on my chest. I carried him downstairs to fix his bottle and feed him. I made him the bottle quickly, fearing that he would soon start to cry, and fed it to him. I was so used to doing this that I didn’t even have to remind myself of when to make him stop to burp. Brad walked up to me and his face was wrong. He looked as if he had been crying also. What was wrong with him? I got up as Bradley finished his bottle, and took him upstairs. Brad followed us. I put Bradley to sleep and went with Brad to our room. He sat on the bed and broke into a sob. I walked up to him, taking his hand, and trying to comfort him. “What’s wrong babe?” He didn’t answer. “What is it? What’s wrong?” He still didn’t answer. He just sobbed. He pulled his hand from mine and looked into my eyes. I could tell by the look in his eyes that it was bad. Something was very wrong. “I…I cheated.” I fell to my knees as the words rushed through my mind. I broke out into an all out breakdown. Tears soaked my face; I screamed and babbled. I wasn’t sure what to do with myself. I curled my body up on the floor and cried. When I had gathered the strength to speak I began to mutter questions: “Who was is? When? Why? Am I just not good enough for you anymore? Why the hell would you do this? Our son? Us? WHAT THE FUCK?!?” I screamed loudly, bringing Mike into the room to make sure everything was okay. Mike cautioned his hands in front of my arms, making sure I didn’t hit Brad or vice versus. Brad was in tears too. “Keira… Three weeks after Bradley was born,” he mumbled. I was glad Mike was there. I could have slapped him. “WHAT THE FUCK WERE YOU THINKING?!?! DID YOU THINK ABOUT YOUR SON OR ME AT ALL?!?!” I was livid. My face was burning. I was ashamed by him. I’d never thought he was the cheating type. I couldn’t believe it. He hung his head, not looking at me or Mike. I took ten deep breaths to calm myself. When I had finally reached that I looked at Brad, “I want you out. Now. I don’t want you any where near my son or me. You can get your stuff and just leave. Don’t call, don’t text, don’t talk to me at all.” I turned away from him, walking out of the door with Mike behind me. I went to Bradley’s room to check on him. He was still sleeping, not bothered by his mother’s yelling. I picked him up from his crib and sat in the rocking chair with him. We sat there for a half hour and I didn’t pay attention to anything but him. When he was good and asleep, I put him back down in the crib and closed the door as I left the room.
Chapter Five
Chapter 5—
I refused to let my mind think about what had happened. When I went downstairs, my mother was just getting home from work. Mike had apparently told her what had happened. She looked at me, trying to smile, and rushed to hug me. She smoothed my hair as I began to cry. What else was I suppose to do? Someone that I had trusted, loved, and cared about had just admitted to cheating on me!! How do you deal with that?? It had never happened to me and, right now, all I wanted to do was cry. So I cried on my mom’s shoulders. Mike had wrapped his arms around both of us, leaning his head against the top of mine. I was happy to have a family, one that really loved me. They wouldn’t ever cheat on me. I smirked a little at the thought of that. Tears were still streaming down my face. I wasn’t sure of what I wanted to do. Brad was gone. I had lost him. All this time, I had thought that we all were happy. How could I have been wrong? What drove him out that far? My mind ran through the moments upstairs: my tears, my screaming, Brad’s tears, the thoughts racing in my head. Why me? What have I done to him? I didn’t understand. I released myself from the embrace between my parents. I went to the counter and picked up my cell phone. I had received at least 19 texts from Brad. I read the first: Can we just talk about this? I went on to the next: Look I love you. Just listen to what I have to say. Please. I didn’t want to hear his begging. I didn’t really want to hear anything he had to say at all. But, I thought of Bradley. What about him? He needs his father, right? He deserved that. He needed his dad. I didn’t know if I was willing to forgive him enough to put up with him so that Bradley could see him. I didn’t want to fight in front of Bradley, for sure. I went on to the next message: Ali I love you. I don’t want to lose you because of 1 stupid mistake. Please, baby girl, just listen to me. I love you so much. & you still love me too. I miss you already. Tears seeped from my eyes. He was right. I do miss him. I do love him, even though he put me through that. My heart throbbed. Baby please, I read. That was it. I broke down. I couldn’t listen to it anymore. I didn’t want to love him, but I did. I didn’t want to fall into this anymore. I didn’t want to even think about it, at all. I deleted my inbox. I didn’t want to read anymore of it. I don’t think I could bear it. I put my phone in my pocket and ran up the stairs. I walked into Bradley’s room and picked him up. I carried him into my room and lay on the bed with him. I couldn’t sleep alone tonight. I’d never sleep at all if that were the case. I relaxed on the bed with Bradley on my chest, sleeping like a rock. My fingers roamed across his back, closing my eyes automatically to calm myself. I eventually fell asleep. I didn’t dream, which came as a relief to me.
Chapter Six
Chapter 6—
I woke to the sound of the alarm. Bradley was sleeping on my chest still, his hand placed on my neck. He felt warm. I wrapped my arms around him, securing him to my body, and got out of my bed. I yawned and carried Bradley back to his room. I laid him down gently and went to my bathroom to get a shower. I went through the process of getting ready slowly. I didn’t want to go to school. I wasn’t ready to see Brad again. Tears welled up in my eyes. I choked them back and concentrated on matching my clothes. I took out a pair of holey jeans, Reef flip-flops, and a chocolate Hollister shirt with the word ‘surf’ printed on the front in big pink letters. I threw it on quickly. I didn’t feel like straightening my hair, so I grabbed the mousse, gel, and hairspray from the rack in my room. I tousled my hair rapidly. When I was done, I went into Bradley’s room and picked him up from the crib. He was awake now, smiling up at me as his eyes met mine. I smiled back and put him on the changing table. I took out a fuzzy, blue sleeper with a camouflage toboggan and socks that matched. I changed his diaper, got him dressed, and made him a bottle. I propped him up and put the bottle on a folded blanket in front of his mouth. As he drank it, I packed his diaper bag with the things we would need for the day. I decided that it would be best to take him to the nursery for today. I was thankful for the school daycare.
I picked up the carrier and headed downstairs. I grabbed a Pepsi and three granola bars, then went out the door, locking it as I left. I strapped in the carrier, and got into the driver’s seat. Putting on my seatbelt, I started the car. I drove carefully to school, and got there 20 minutes early. I sat in the parking lot and listened to music quietly, while Bradley slept. Nicole came over to greet us and we walked to the nursery before going to first period. The woman in the nursery asked for my cell phone number and a copy of my schedule. I gave her my mom’s and mike’s cell phone numbers as well. I kissed Bradley on the forehead and went to class. My day went by quickly, and before I knew it, it was lunch. I went to get Bradley from the nursery and I didn’t even bother taking the carrier. I took him to the lunch room with me and sat in my usual seat.
I waited for Nicole to come sit down before I went to get lunch. When she got to the table, I handed Bradley to her. She cradled her arms and I placed him in them. I went quickly through the line. As I walked out of the line, someone came behind me. “Hey Ali,” Brad’s deep voice called out for me. Tears started to come to my eyes. I held them back, fighting each one. I knew this was why I wanted to stay home. I turned around, tempted to throw my food in his face. Not while Bradley is here, I thought to myself. He was half-smiling at me. I didn’t return his reaction to seeing me. “Yes??” I asked, kind of sarcastically. His smile went away. I studied his face. His expression was hurt, pained, and apologetic. For a moment, I felt sorry for him. Then I realized that the guy standing in front of me was a cold, heartless, cheating bitch. I definitely had no reason to feel sorry for him. “I was hoping, that maybe, we could just talk. I texted you last night. But, I guess you already know that.” He murmured quietly, drifting off in his thoughts. I nodded. I turned to walk back to my table. His hand caught my arm, and his other hand reached up to grab my face as he placed his lips on mine. He kissed me!!
I couldn’t believe this was happening. And, I kissed him back!! What the hell?!? What was I doing?!?! He pulled back and I opened my eyes. Smack him, my minded demanded. My heart ached. His eyes were studying my face. I wanted to cry. I turned back around and walked to the table where Nicole waited, her jaw dropped and face in shock. Bradley was squirming in her arms. I put down my tray and picked him up. I didn’t have an appetite anymore; I just wanted to hold Bradley. Tears slowly streamed down my cheeks. I stared at Bradley, blocking out everything else. I didn’t even notice that I had started to really cry until Nicole reached over and grabbed my hand. I held her hand and Bradley close to me.
Someone came up behind me, placing their hand on my shoulder. I looked up to see Brad’s face, his eyes weary and concerned. That look sent pains through to my heart. It throbbed. Tears streamed continuously down my cheeks. My face burned. I really do love him, I thought. My mind was in agreement with my heart. But how could I forgive him? How could I look at him the same again? I gave Bradley to Nicole and stood up in front of Brad. We were hurting each other. I wasn’t the only one aching in the situation. We both were. I stepped in to hug him closely in my arms. I ran my fingers through his hair, clutching him to me. I didn’t want to lose this, ever. We deserved it, our son deserved this. We loved each other. That was all that could possibly matter. I let go of him and grabbed his hand. We sat back down and I took Bradley back from Nicole. A slight smile stretched across my face. I handed him to Brad. As he settled our son into his arms I studied him. I wasn’t sure what it was, but something made my heart and my mind suddenly sure that everything was going to be okay. I wiped my face clean of tears.
Chapter Seven
Chapter 7—
We finally pulled into the driveway of my house, back to the way we had always done. “Are you ready for this?” I breathed. My eyes were looking straight into Brad’s, studying his expression. He smiled and nodded. I turned to look back at Bradley, who was fast asleep in the backseat. Brad’s things were in the trunk, ready to be moved back into the house. I sighed, took a deep breath, and opened the door. I got Bradley out of the back seat, closing the door gently so that he wouldn’t wake. I walked steadily to the door and opened it. Brad followed, hesitantly, behind me. God, let them see! I walked into the house, taking Brad’s hand as I stepped in. We walked to the living room where my mom and Mike were waiting. Their smiles disappeared the moment they saw us, Brad particularly. Mike stood up and my mother grabbed his arm, preventing him from moving any further. “Hey,” I murmured. Mike’s face was stern; my mother’s nearly the same. “Alison. Kaye. Mitchell,” my parents breathed in synchronization. I suddenly felt scared, which was new for me. I’d never been in trouble with them before. I was always good, and in this case, I wasn’t really being ‘bad’. I could feel Brad tense up behind me, his hand still in mine. I took a deep breath, getting ready to explain. My mother stood up before I could gather the words together in my brain. I turned around to Brad and gave him Bradley. “Go on upstairs with him and I’ll be there in a minute,” I smiled at him. He smiled back and went up the stairs. I turned slowly back to my mother. Her face was softer this time, calmer. Mike’s was the same. I opened my mouth. My mother’s eyes filled with tears and she wrapped me in her arms. She sobbed quietly on my shoulder. I was confused. What this about Brad, or was it something else? I comforted my mom, rubbing her back. When she was calm enough to speak, she turned to see my face. I could tell that this wasn’t about Brad at all. Her eyes dropped to the floor as she spoke, “Your grandmother called this afternoon, before you got home.”
I was definitely confused now. Mammaw had been dead for almost 4 years now. Then it came to me, I had more than just one side to my family. I’d never known my father’s side of the family. Mike and Mom were my family. Why would she have called if she’d never met me? Mike’s voice broke the silence, “Honey, you’re dad was in an accident. He passed away this morning.” I wasn’t sure what to think, as I allowed the words to sink in. Of course, I was a little sad, someone was dead. But, it didn’t tragically hit me. I mean, I’d never met the man. And, from what I was told, he didn’t want to meet me. So, tears didn’t come to me. Mike spoke again, this time quieter, “Why is he here, Alison?” My gazed met his eyes, and I began to try to explain to him. “I forgive him. And, I hope that you can too. You don’t have to clearly understand, if you don’t want to. But, Bradley deserves to have a family. A complete family, with his daddy too. We can’t give that to him, not alone. But, we can forgive. I really do love him Daddy. I do.” Mike’s expression softened. I wasn’t sure why, but something looked as if it had melted his heart. Little tears streaked his cheeks. “Wha…What did you say?” I was confused for a moment. “I…uh... I said I love him.” His hands came up to embrace my face. His fingers smoothed across my cheeks. He pressed his lips to my forehead. I smiled. What had I done to make him this happy? “Baby girl, you called me Daddy.” Tears were streaming now. I hugged him tightly. That meant the world to him. I’d never known that before. He’s always been my dad; I just never thought to call him so. He stroked my hair. I smiled widely. “Dad, can he stay? Please.” He looked down at me and nodded. He hugged me once more and kissed my forehead. I leaned down to hug my mother, who was sitting down on the couch, amazed by what she had just seen. I smiled and scurried up the stairs.
Brad was in my room lying down with Bradley, both of them knocked out. I stood in the doorway, smiling at them. I went to the closet, quietly, and got out some sweatpants and a tank top. I went to the bathroom and closed the door slowly. I threw my hair into a messy bun and put my pajamas on. I brushed my teeth and rinsed my mouth quickly. I opened the door slowly. I flipped the light off and walked to my bed where Brad and Bradley were still stretched out wide. I leaned over and grabbed Bradley. I carried him to his room, changed his diaper and dressed him in his pajamas. I lay him in his crib, kissed his forehead, and went back to my room. Brad had shifted over to the outside edge of the bed. I climbed over him and rolled over to the other side. I pulled the blankets up over us and curled up next to him, clinging tight. I sighed to myself and smiled. My life was finally done spiraling. It was back to the way it was. I drifted off into a comforting sleep.
Chapter Eight
Chapter Eight—
When I woke up, the sun was shining bright into my room. My eyes struggled to open in the light. My mind raced back to what had just happened the night before. I smiled. I looked over to find the other side of the bed empty. I wiggled my body over the edge and swung my legs over the edge, dangling my feet. I hopped up and went to carry on my daily routine. I showered quickly, and dressed carelessly. It’s Saturday, who cares!! I thought to myself. I threw my hair into a messy bun and went down the stairs. As I got half way down the stairs, I smelt the amazing aromas coming from the kitchen. Bacon, sausage, eggs, and a hint of cinnamon tickled my senses. It made my mouth water and my body to move quicker. When I got down to the kitchen, I discovered the creator of the scents. Brad was standing at the stove, over a pan of large pancakes, while Bradley dozed off in his carrier. I looked over to the clock and noticed that it was already noon. Wow!! He smiled when he saw me, and I crossed the space between us to kiss him. I breathed as our lips separated and our eyes met. “Good morning beautiful,” he said to me. My face lit up like a Christmas tree and I couldn’t help but smile.
After I had wolfed down my breakfast, I helped Brad clean up the kitchen. I was humming my favorite song, when Brad looked over to me suddenly. His face was thoughtful and I studied his expressions to see what he was about to say. “Let’s go out tonight, just me, you and Bradley. I want to go somewhere special, get dressed up and all, you know?” I looked over to him, my face a little surprised, and smiled. We hadn’t been out anywhere for quite awhile, and I didn’t mind dressing up every now and then. “Sure,” I said. He smiled brightly at me. He turned and picked up Bradley, kissing his face and whispering to him. When I finally had the kitchen cleaned, I went to give Bradley a bath. He didn’t mind baths so much now, which made it easier for me to do. I didn’t like to see him upset or crying. It made me upset. My thoughts wandered back to when I first gave him a bath. My thoughts came back to what I was doing.
I dressed Bradley carefully. I sighed once I had finished, noticing his exhausted expression. I fixed his bottle and laid him down. When he finally fell asleep, I went upstairs to lie down for a few minutes. I plopped down on my bed and closed my eyes. My brain started to race as I thought about the occasion for tonight’s outing. Our anniversary was in June, and it was only April, so it wasn’t that. It wasn’t either of our birthdays. I could not seem to find the reason for this event, but I decided to just go with it and enjoy our night out. I wasn’t sure what restaurant we were going to, but Brad said we were to dress up. So I got up off our bed and went to search my closet for something to wear. I picked out 4 dresses, 2 shirts, 3 pairs of pants, and at least 10 pairs of shoes. After trying on all the things I picked out, I decided to wear a turquoise tank top with silver sequins with a white button-down dress shirt over, and black dress pants. I went through my shoes and found my turquoise, sparkling strappy heels.
When it got close to five, I went back to my room and began to get ready. I straightened my hair, did my make up, and got dressed within an hour. When I was finished, I went to get Bradley all dressed up in his khaki pants, blue and white polo, and socks. I packed a diaper bag full, which included bottles, bottled water, formula, a camouflage bib with “I Love Mommy” printed on the front, and plenty of diapers and wipes. When we were finished, I put him in the carrier, grabbed the bag and my little clutch purse, with my credit and debt card, phone, and wallet in it. I hurried down the stairs to meet Brad at the door. He took Bradley and my hand and we walked out the door. He put Bradley in the back and climbed in the passenger seat while I started my car. I backed the car out of the driveway, around my mother’s car, and started slowly down the street. Brad took my hand and didn’t let go of it until we got closer into town. I turned to look at him, not sure where we were going. “Keep straight,” he said to me. I turned back to the road and kept straight. After driving about 10 miles down the road, he told me to make a left. I turned the car, carefully, left. About 3 and ½ miles later we came across a gorgeous building with a sign, stating the building’s name, Promessa Bella. I was truly dazzled by the sight of this beautiful building. There were twinkling lights everywhere, an enormous flower garden with elegant glass tables covered in white table cloths and red rose pettles. I pulled into the parking lot and found the closest space I could find, which wasn’t easy. When I parked the car, I finally looked over at Brad. He noticed my expressions and smile at me. “It means ‘beautiful promise’,” he told me. I smiled and leaned in to kiss him. “Thank you,” I said. We looked back at Bradley, who was already looking at us. I smiled at him and turned back to get out of the car.
As we approached the restaurant, I couldn’t help but smile. Everything were so beautiful. The hostess sat us quickly after finding our reservation, and got us drinks. We sat outside by a hedge of rose bushes and an arch of twinkling lights behind us. There weren’t many people in this part of the restaurant, which I assumed Brad had requested. He was big on privacy. “It’s beautiful,” I said. He shook his head in agreement while taking Bradley out of the carrier to hold him in his lap. Bradley had recently learned to sit up by his self, mostly. We still had to hold him up, just in case he lost his balance or just got tired of sitting up. “Hi baby boy,” I said to Bradley. He smiled his brilliant smile. I giggled at him, making him smile again. Brad laughed quietly at us. When the waitress came back with our drinks, I looked at her and then Brad. He paid her no attention, despite her gorgeous appearance. I smirked a little in satisfaction. “What can I get you all tonight?” she asked, obviously looking at my guys. Brad ordered our food, knowing exactly what I wanted. I always had the same thing when I came to Italian food, shrimp alfredo with salad and breadsticks. It was my favorite thing to eat. She frowned slightly and I assumed it was because Brad gave her no response at all. When she left our table, I laughed a little to myself. Brad smiled at me, knowing what I was laughing about. “She’s jealous, you know?” He noticed too, that she was staring at my family. Most teenage girls don’t have this; a guy that really loves her, and a family of her own. A lot of fathers walk away from their child’s mother, leaving her to raise the baby alone. But not Brad, he’s always been here. And, I was glad that he was different.
Chapter Nine
Chapter Nine—
Dinner passed quickly, and eventually, Bradley fell asleep. While we were eating dessert, I noticed that Brad had begun to get nervous. He was playing with his napkin, and holding Bradley’s hand, and shaking his leg. That was usually his was of expressing nervousness, and I was well aware of it.I began to get nervous myself because I wasn’t sure why Brad was so nervous. What was going on? What was he going to say? Something bad? Good? I didn’t know, and it was getting frustrating. Our conversation fell into awkward silence. I sat there playing with the chocolate lava cake on my plate for about 5 minutes when he finally broke the silence. “Ali, when I first saw you I knew that I had to have you. I couldn’t let you walk away from me without knowing that I had some kind of a chance with you. You are smart, gorgeous, funny, outgoing, and all around amazing. I’ve put you through some hell, and I’m so very sorry for that. I never meant to hurt you. I love you with all my heart, and I hope you feel the same about me,” he looked as if he was going to cry. My heart began to race, not sure what he was saying to me. I nodded my head in agreement. He smiled, “Baby, you are the very person I think about when I wake up. You’re the only one I want, and ever will want for the rest of my life. Will you marry me?” Tears were streaming down his face and I gasped. My own eyes welled up with tears. He pulled out a small black case from his jacket pocket and opened it up to exposed a beautiful silver ring with a gorgeous diamond in the middle. A smile covered my face and I couldn’t hold back my tears. He stood up and took my hand, bringing me up too. He got down on one knee in front of me and looked up at me, smiling. “Alison Kaye Mitchell, will you please marry me?” I smiled at him and cleared my face. “Of course,” I said without hesitation or doubt. He looked back down at the ring and took it out of the little case, slipping it onto my left ring finger. He then jumped up and wrapped his arms around me. I closed my eyes, tears running down my face again. When I pulled out of his embrace, I looked over at our son, sleeping in the carrier. I smiled and looked back to Brad, leaning in to kiss him. My life couldn’t get better than this. Brad lifted me off the ground and spun us around in a small circle, kissing me. I couldn’t help but smile. When he put me down he took my hand. We looked at our sleeping son and turned to look at each other. “Let’s get him home,” Brad said. I nodded in agreement. I dropped his hand and went over to get Bradley’s things together. Once I had it all together, I told Brad I was going to the car. “I’ll be there as soon as I get this paid for.” I walked to the car and put Bradley, carefully, in the back. I got into the front seat and sighed. Looking at the ring on my finger, I smiled.
Impressum
Tag der Veröffentlichung: 27.07.2012
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