Motivation (MDC #1)

Motivation (MDC #1)

by DeYtH Banger

Other Books

 

Other Books

 

 

 

by DeYtH Banger

 

 

 

 

• How to Talk to Anyone (Junior Talker #1) by DeYtH Banger
• How to Talk to Anyone (Junior Talker #2) by DeYtH Banger
• How to Talk to Anyone (Junior Talker #3) by DeYtH Banger

 

 

• Brain on Porn (Social #1) by DeYtH Banger
• Brain on Porn (Social #2) by DeYtH Banger

 

• Bridge Of Writing (Domination #1)  by DeYtH Banger
• Bridge Of Writing (Domination #2)  by DeYtH Banger

 

 

 

Bonus Material

Note: This books can help you to go throw rough times... or places in your life when you just don't know what to do.

 

 

 

• The Carefree Installation System by Jason Capital
• Good Will Hunting by Matt Damon
• How to Be a 3% Man, Winning the Heart of the Woman of Your Dreams by Corey Wayne
• Breaking the Cycle: Free Yourself from Sex Addiction, Porn Obsession, and Shame by George Collins
• The Little Book Of Life by Alan Macmillan Orr
• The Friend Zone Formula by Jason Capital

Resources

Special thanks to:

 

 

Hardcore Self Help: F**k Anxiety by Robert Duff

 

(Review: "October 24, 2018 – 

100.0% "Anxiety and Depressions are just an example of horrible combination."
October 24, 2018 – Shelved
October 24, 2018 – Started Reading")

 

 

 

Discipline Equals Freedom: Field Manual by Jocko Willink 

 

 

(Review: "October 13, 2018 – 
100.0%
October 13, 2018 – page 139 
73.54%
October 13, 2018 – page 139 
73.54%
October 12, 2018 – page 89 
47.09% "It goes like a click bait... you constaly click and you are wasting time... that's what Jocko is trying to point out."
October 12, 2018 – page 89 
47.09% "This book is full of lessons... and tips... well written and well formed..."
October 12, 2018 – page 89 
47.09%
October 11, 2018 – Shelved
October 11, 2018 – Started Reading")

 

 

 

 Unfu*k Yourself: Get Out of Your Head and Into Your Life by Gary John Bishop

 

    (Review: "October 29, 2018 – page 161 
72.85% "This book is explaining how our lifes are ruled by our expectations... and then we talk about "Free Will"..."
October 26, 2018 – page 161 
72.85%
October 26, 2018 – page 139 
62.9% "So what was it?

I may not be able to guess exactly what you were doing, but I can be certain of one thing: you were uncomfortable. Put a slightly different way, you were most likely operating outside of your “comfort zone”.""
October 26, 2018 – page 139 
62.9% "Well, you probably weren’t sitting on the couch pondering your navel. Chances are you weren’t wrapped up in in the humdrum of your everyday existence either, or mentally calculating the sharp rise in the price of milk since 1977."
October 26, 2018 – page 139 
62.9% ""Maybe you made a really big sale, started a new business, or bought a house. Maybe you got married to the love of your life or went back to school or completed a marathon. It could be anything you’re truly proud of. 

How the hell did you achieve it?"
October 24, 2018 – page 139 
62.9%
October 24, 2018 – page 115 
52.04% "You are not your thoughts. They’re just a bunch of random things running through your head. Much of them you have no control over. 

Eventually we’d all like to have better, more positive thoughts. But sitting there isn’t going to make it happen.""
October 24, 2018 – page 115 
52.04% ""“I am not my thoughts; I am what I do”. 

That’s your newest personal assertion, the phrase that sums it all up. Go ahead, try it out. “I am not my thoughts; I am what I do”."
October 24, 2018 – page 115 
52.04% "Don’t know what to do or where to start? Good, that’s your first action. Find out, understand. Trawl the internet, read books, ask questions, take courses, seek advice, do whatever you need to do to unfuck yourself and get into your life.

Get up on your feet and get going.""
October 24, 2018 – page 115 
52.04% "It’s all about action. Going out there, doing it and taking all your negative bullshit along for the ride. It’s never going to get any better, any easier or any more understandable. This is it, life is now and you’re never going to have a better moment than this."
October 24, 2018 – page 115 
52.04% "We could go on and on. The point is, positive thinking isn’t a predictor of accomplishment any more than negative thinking indicates failure. All of the people described above acted independently of their internal condition. You can too."
October 24, 2018 – page 115 
52.04% ""On the other hand, think of how many people with negative thoughts have gone on to become wildly successful.

All the legendary musicians with drug problems. All the pro athletes with anger management issues. The models with unhealthy body images. The millionaires with scarcity mindsets."
October 24, 2018 – page 115 
52.04% "They toiled, doubted and had sleepless nights, they worried and battled and ground it out until their lives and their work finally aligned.

I mean, come on, chances are you can think of plenty of people, past and present, who appeared to have “good thoughts” but never accomplished much.""
October 24, 2018 – page 115 
52.04% "They rolled up whatever was in their way, set it aside and strode out into the unknown. It wasn’t a passive endeavor. Their greatness didn’t just miraculously float out into the ether for us to consume. If they hadn’t taken action, we’d have never known what their passions were in the first place. We’d never have witnessed their greatness or wisdom."
October 24, 2018 – page 115 
52.04% ""Do you think Gandhi or Rosa Parks or Abraham Lincoln were never gripped by thoughts of doubt, fear or uncertainty? How about Nikola Tesla or Steve Jobs? Do you seriously think those people woke up every day in the perfect mood with “everything’s coming up roses”, playing in their heads? HELL NO! They were wracked by the same kind of shit you are, but they acted ANYWAY."
October 24, 2018 – page 115 
52.04% "Of course, your mind will always try to rationalize not acting. It’ll remind you of all the other things you could be doing. It’ll drudge up all your recent stresses and doubts. 

But don’t act on your thoughts. Act on what’s in front of you. 

Change your life by changing your actions. That’s the only way.""
October 24, 2018 – page 115 
52.04% "Simply act. Put aside your thoughts and move. 

It’s not about psyching yourself up. It’s not about getting everything aligned just right. Just act. Do it. 

Not in a minute. Not after this show is over. Now."
October 24, 2018 – page 115 
52.04% ""Today, I want you to do something different than what you normally do. I want you to act in a way that’s independent of your typical negative or unproductive thoughts. Act on the moment and in line with what the item in front of your face demands of you. Fuck how you feel, ACT!

Don’t wait for the mood to strike. Don’t get stuck looking for that magic feeling that will do the work 

for you."
October 24, 2018 – page 115 
52.04% "When you think about it, that’s basically what most of us do. We want to be driven. We think a more productive mood will chauffeur us through life, a confident mood will make things easier or more do-able. But if you want to get to where you’re going, you’ll have to take the wheel. 

You have to buckle in and stomp hard on that gas pedal, whether you’re ready to or not.""
October 24, 2018 – page 115 
52.04% "But you’ve got to put your key in the ignition, crank ‘er up, and put it in drive first. The car isn’t going to start itself and then wait patiently for you in the driveway."
October 24, 2018 – page 115 
52.04% "Simply put, when we act, we just don’t have time for anything else! It’s hard to focus on your internal worrying and naysaying when you’re busy getting things done. It’s all about momentum. Once you’ve started rolling, it’s easier to stay moving. That road that looked so long and intimidating before starts to blur as you speed across it."
October 24, 2018 – page 115 
52.04% "" what Dale says here. When we choose action instead of inaction, when we act beyond our automatic thoughts, something interesting happens: we start to forget about the things that are bothering us."
October 24, 2018 – page 115 
52.04% "More specifically, act in a way that’s in your best interests rather than in a way that is dominated by how you automatically think and feel. Each time will be better than the last until your mind wakes up and realizes, “Hey, I can do this. I’m learning!”"
October 24, 2018 – page 115 
52.04% "The next time you’re feeling or experiencing any sort of negative or diminishing thought that disempowers you, move on immediately. Act independently of that thought."
October 24, 2018 – page 115 
52.04% "Consider this: You just messed something important up. Immediately thoughts like “I’m so stupid” and “I always screw things up” randomly pop into your head. 

All this means is that your reaction to one situation is out of sync with the whole. Just like when you whine (yes, you whine), about how “impossible” what you need to do is. Your brain starts to follow that line of thought all the way down the rabbit hole!""
October 24, 2018 – page 115 
52.04% "The gap between how life is and how we think life is; is often the black hole in which we fruitlessly labor. 

We think things are worse or better, harder or easier than they actually are from this cacophony of background noise and judgement."
October 24, 2018 – page 115 
52.04% ""Our minds often have an unrealistic perception of the world, peppered with interpretation, misunderstanding, automatic behaviors and opinions, and cultural and familial programming all laid on top of our lives like designs on a giant sheet of tracing paper while the more we strive to get our reality to match this design, the more we struggle."
October 24, 2018 – page 115 
52.04% "Your thoughts start to become intuitive action over time until you start to act independently of your negative thoughts time after time after time. Are you going to think about yourself and what you lack, or are you going to deal with the actions presenting themselves right there in that moment of time?""
October 24, 2018 – page 115 
52.04% "Many times those same thoughts and feelings are pulling you away from your potential. Things like doubt, fear, procrastination or frustration rule the day instead of the kind of positive action that will actually forward your life.

If you always attack the task at hand without hesitation, what will you think the next time you have something important to do?"
October 24, 2018 – page 115 
52.04% ""There are a couple reasons for this. We know your thoughts can become your reality. And when your reality is one of acting on the things that are in your best interests, your thoughts will actually shift to match that. Think about this: your thoughts (and the resulting feelings) are not always aligned with what is in the best interests of your life, your health, your finances or your potential."
October 24, 2018 – page 115 
52.04% ""Thoughts without actions are just that, thoughts and your negative thoughts about yourself, others or your circumstances will have no impact on your success as long as you leave them where they lie.""
October 24, 2018 – page 115 
52.04% "I’ve come across literally thousands of people in my career who have spent their lives waiting to feel or think differently. And while inspiration or motivation may strike once in a while, they are fickle friends and can’t be depended on to show up whenever you need them.""
October 24, 2018 – page 115 
52.04% "As I consistently say to my clients, you don’t have to feel like today is your day, you just have to act like it is. 

Sure, it never hurts to be in the right kind of mood or mindset, but if we sit around waiting to be in the perfect mood, we’re just never going to get started."
October 24, 2018 – page 115 
52.04% "You’re going to have days where you don’t want to get out of bed, where you don’t want to go to work, where you don’t want to take care of your responsibilities. But you do. Every day you engage in activities that you don’t really want to do. That means you already have a muscle for having thoughts and acting independently of them."
October 24, 2018 – page 115 
52.04% "Many of the things I teach my clients involve changing the way you approach and look at life. But these are long-term solutions. Ultimately my goal is to help you shift your subconscious. And that, my dears, is like turning a battleship. It takes time.

No matter how hard you try, you’re going to have the occasional negative thought. Maybe more than occasionally. Maybe every day. Maybe hundreds of times per day."
October 24, 2018 – page 115 
52.04% ""We have just as many pointless, irrelevant thoughts as important ones. Then there are those default thoughts that pop into your head day in and day out. Thoughts of unworthiness, being judged, not belonging or some lack of competence. All of this while going to work, paying your bills, going to the grocery store or driving your car!"
October 24, 2018 – page 115 
52.04% ""The truth is, it’s difficult to have a say in, let alone control, what you think about. Especially because, as we’ve established elsewhere in this book, we’re not even aware of the majority of things we think about.""
October 24, 2018 – page 115 
52.04% "Haven’t you wondered why you came up with positivity as an answer to your life in the first place? Have you ever noticed how you are when impacted or surrounded by apparently negative people or situations? That’s right, even you get gripped by the old negative hand now and again no matter how you might try and avoid it.""
October 24, 2018 – page 115 
52.04% ""It’d be great if we could simply decide to never have a negative thought, but when it comes down to it, that’s just not realistic. I know, I know, my positive-thinking peeps are losing their minds at this statement but here’s something for even those people to consider."
October 24, 2018 – page 115 
52.04% "What he is trying to point out... we are wasting our precious time with shitty stuff... times passes and passes and we waste it..."
October 24, 2018 – page 115 
52.04% "Someone walks past your cubicle. You frantically click your mouse and mash on the keyboard, feigning busyness for the unsuspecting intruder. “Whew, that was close!” 

Look at the clock again. 11:13. Another half an hour wasted. “I should really get to work... right after I...”""
October 24, 2018 – page 115 
52.04% ""Quick step back to reality. You check your email. A message from your credit card company. “I’m in so much debt. I’m never going to get out of this mess. No hover shoes or lunch out for me.”

A notification from that online dating site you signed up for a few weeks ago. “I’ll never find someone. My love life is a disaster. Maybe relationships and I just don’t match.”"
October 22, 2018 – page 115 
52.04%
October 22, 2018 – page 93 
42.08% "Don’t stop there. Instead of simply stretching our comfort zones, let’s blow the thing up completely. Try acting in a way you’d never think about acting. Doing something completely out of character would be a great start. Embrace that uncertainty and strike a blow for your future!""
October 22, 2018 – page 93 
42.08% ""Do them. Starting now. There’s no better time than this moment. Develop and grow that muscle to be with the uncertain in life. To be with the glory of life itself, unconstrained by your own limits and opinions."
October 22, 2018 – page 93 
42.08% ""The person who avoids the uncertain doesn’t do this. They’re too afraid of being judged. They’re too afraid to look foolish or stupid. They are stopped, one foot nailed to the floor by an illusion.""
October 22, 2018 – page 93 
42.08% "The more we try to stay comfortable today, the more uncomfortable we’ll be tomorrow. There really is no destination, there is only exploring, exploring and exploring.""
October 22, 2018 – page 93 
42.08% ""As you’ve probably noticed, when you do try to stay in your comfort zone, you never truly feel comfortable. There’s always that nagging feeling that you could be doing more. There’s always that desire for a life that’s better than the one you have now."
October 22, 2018 – page 93 
42.08% ""They’re not afraid of the uncertain; It’s just a part of life. They don’t seek out certainty because they know it doesn’t really exist. They are also the kind of people who are aware of and open to the real magic and miracles of life and what can be accomplished.""
October 22, 2018 – page 93 
42.08% "Nothing is certain. You could go to sleep tonight and never wake up. You could get in your car and never make it to work. Certainty is a complete illusion. Voodoo.""
October 22, 2018 – page 93 
42.08% ""The funny thing is, no matter how much you chase certainty, you’ll never really be able to hold it or retain it. That’s because it doesn’t exist. The universe will always send us little reminders of its chaos and power, and no one is exempt from the prompting."
October 22, 2018 – page 93 
42.08% ""That’s the kind of power that uncertainty has in our lives. It can make us or break us. It can make us rich or make us poor. It can be the key to our success or drive us in the other direction. 

For many people, it ends up being both.""
October 22, 2018 – page 93 
42.08% "They didn’t succeed because they were certain they were going to succeed; They succeeded because they didn’t let uncertainty stop them. They did it anyway. They ignored their doubts and kept pushing forward. They were relentless when the only thing they had to fuel them was relentlessness.""
October 22, 2018 – page 93 
42.08% ""There were days when they doubted what they were doing. Where they thought, “this is never going to work”. Many found themselves on the verge of giving up at numerous occasions along the way."
October 22, 2018 – page 93 
42.08% "The problem is that we think too much and that's what cost us few troubles along the way."
October 22, 2018 – page 93 
42.08% "You can’t. The truth is you can’t even predict what the people you know will do, let alone the people you don’t know. Whether it’s the checkout line or a night club or the bank, social situations are inevitably filled with uncertainty. Jeez, half of the time you can’t even predict your own thoughts and feelings! Think of the many times you’ve rushed to judge and then later changed your mind.""
October 22, 2018 – page 93 
42.08% ""Think about it: How can you go to new places if you never leave the house? How can you make friends and start romances without meeting new people? How can you do anything new by doing what you’ve always done?"
October 12, 2018 – page 93 
42.08% "Chapter 5 - Now On

...

This book shows you about what most people give a fuck and for what they care and how this "Fuck"... screws you over..."
October 12, 2018 – page 93 
42.08%
October 12, 2018 – Shelved
October 12, 2018 – Started Reading") - It's like bible with thoughts... 

 

 

 

The Shyness and Social Anxiety System by Sean Cooper

 

 

 

 

 

"November 12, 2018 – page 107 
52.97% "“If I
valued myself, what would I do?” Would you start by taking care of your body? Of
course you would. Start exercising and working out, eat healthy food, etc. Once
you start doing this, you really do feel entitled to be confident and expressive,
because your mind sees that you are taking actions that show you value yourself.""
November 12, 2018 – page 107 
52.97% "difficult to feel like you are entitled to other peopleʼs friendship and affection when
that is the way you are living your life. You are acting in a way that says: “I do not
value myself,” and that comes across when you talk to other people.
So the first step is to start treating yourself like you value yourself. Think:"
November 12, 2018 – page 107 
52.97% ""Treating Yourself Like You Value Yourself
I have found that it is much harder to be confident around people if I donʼt
take steps to show myself that I value myself. For example, if youʼve sat around
your house all day eating Cheetos and playing video games, itʼs going to be
pretty difficult to not think other people are superior to you. Itʼs going to be pretty"
November 12, 2018 – page 107 
52.97%
November 12, 2018 – page 103 
50.99% "The problem is that we swim in our thoughts... and our thoughts are shaping a fake reality... by using fake data from past...for the present and future moments...

....

The whole thing is just try to focus on the now things..."
November 12, 2018 – page 103 
50.99% "forget about it! Itʼs done man, you canʼt go back to that. The river keeps flowing.
Stay in the present!”""
November 12, 2018 – page 103 
50.99% "10
years, 10 months, 10 minutes or even 10 seconds ago, then you are not able to
focus on the only place where your actions can make a difference, which is the
present.
You canʼt affect the past or the future. I remember when I was learning to
play a new instrument a friend said: “If you mess up or play the wrong note,"
November 12, 2018 – page 103 
50.99% ""Your thoughts about the past are also not real. When you think about your
past, you are reliving something that happened before. It may be true that you
are thinking about a real event that happened, but the point is actual event is not
happening right now. If you are constantly focusing on things that happened"
November 10, 2018 – page 103 
50.99% "103 out of 113"
November 10, 2018 – page 103 
50.99% ""If you are ever wondering “Whatʼs the right thing to say in this situation?”,
STOP. Start to install the belief that what you say is the right thing to say, not
because itʼs a great comment, but because it comes from you. Donʼt be afraid to
say things that are boring or obvious. People are perfectly satisfied talking to
another, regular, normal person.""
November 10, 2018 – page 100 
49.5%
November 10, 2018 – page 88 
43.56% "Or maybe you have one or two people who
you can “be yourself” around, but when you try to talk to other people you donʼt
know what to say and become inhibited?
Many people who I teach often assume that they need to learn some new
social skills to improve their personality. This isnʼt true at all in most cases.""
November 10, 2018 – page 88 
43.56% ""What I am trying to get you to do here is to get in touch with the way you
naturally act when you donʼt feel the pressure of other peopleʼs eyes on you.
Do you ever notice how at home you walk completely relaxed and normal,
yet become self conscious in public?"
November 10, 2018 – page 88 
43.56% "Donʼt worry
about your temperature being too low, thatʼs not your issue right now.
Yes, there are some people who could benefit from being more inhibited.
But if you are reading this book, thatʼs not you. You need to focus on disinhibiting
yourself.""
November 10, 2018 – page 88 
43.56% ""How do I respond to this? Yes, the world does need a certain amount of
inhibition. But not you. The key words are “a certain amount.” You have such an
excessive amount of inhibition, you are like someone with a fever telling me that
some temperature is necessary for people to stay alive. If you have a fever, the
best thing to do is to focus completely on reducing your temperature."
November 10, 2018 – page 88 
43.56% "2. "Will it sound good?"
3. "What's the best way to say it?"
91
4. ...and only then do they actually say it.
This type of thinking is called Self-Monitoring, and it's bad for several
reasons:"

- Sometimes this process slowdowns and it really fucks you up..."
November 10, 2018 – page 88 
43.56% ""For example: Is what you say next going to be liked? Are your clothes
representative of your personality? Will the way you walk give off the right vibe?
What's the right body language? Will doing this or that make you seem less
smart? Do people secretly respect the way you are?
This is the process shy people go through before they say or do something:
1. "What should I say next?""
November 10, 2018 – page 88 
43.56% "Unfortunately, as great as this sounds, there is no magic technique to
achieve it. It happens over time, as you gain more experiences and start to live
the concepts I have laid out here for you.
89""
November 10, 2018 – page 88 
43.56% "to get to a point where you are much less dependent on other peopleʼs reactions
for you to feel okay about yourself as a person. You want to start having more
control over your own emotions and increase your indifference to what people
think of you."
November 10, 2018 – page 88 
43.56% ""If someone teases you, do you feel affected? If someone criticizes you, do
you feel the need to keep talking and convincing other people you are not what
they said you were? It simply shows you care about their opinions too much.
Instead, you want to remain unaffected by peopleʼs negative reactions. You want"
November 10, 2018 – page 88 
43.56% ""One of the biggest issues I see with people who have shyness and social
anxiety is that they are very dependent on other peopleʼs validation and approval.
They rely on other peopleʼs acceptance.
If someone has the ability to make you feel worthless simply by giving you
disapproval, then they have all power and control over you. You have given your
power away by requiring their validation.""
November 10, 2018 – page 88 
43.56% ""Implement this mindset in everything you do. The fact that sometimes you
get approval and sometimes disapproval from other people says nothing about
you. It's useful feedback, but the idea in your mind that you must/should/ought
constantly meet otherʼs standards to get approval and positive reactions or
else feel hopelessly inadequate is completely false.""
November 10, 2018 – page 83 
41.09% "That's the problem... that's the main problem... mostly main happiness and approval... and self-esteem is conditional... "IF" something happens... he or she is going to get more "Up"... if not... more "down""
November 10, 2018 – page 83 
41.09% ""For each person building self esteem based on an accomplishment, an
ability, physical appearance, and so on, they feel good about themselves for as
long as their skills, abilities, and accomplishments remain intact. Yet when their
skills, relationships, accomplishments and so on change, they lose themselves in
the process. Is this self-worth? No, it's "things' worth," not self-worth.""
November 10, 2018 – page 83 
41.09%
November 10, 2018 – page 65 
32.18% "•Self-Consciousness: If you can walk and move normally when alone in
your house, but then feel tense and self-conscious in social situations, itʼs
because you are super aware of how other people are seeing you. Instead of
82
letting your legs and body move themselves like you usually do, you are trying
to monitor what other people will think of your actions and you try to adjust them
manually.""
November 10, 2018 – page 65 
32.18% ""Here are some examples of behaviours that come from needing to meet
other peopleʼs standard to get them to approve of you:
•Insecurities: If you are concerned about any “defect” you have, and
constantly check how it looks in mirrors, and measure it somehow constantly,
then you are worrying that the defect makes you unworthy of their approval."
November 10, 2018 – page 65 
32.18% "This explains a lot of ... with what mindset you get inside... your body is showing what deeply down you feel...

So after all... failure comes from inner place!"
November 10, 2018 – page 65 
32.18% ""Do you remember back to the beginning of this book when I told you that
social anxiety was rooted in a fear of disapproval? Yes?
You are socially anxious because deep in your mind you have a core belief
that says: “I must be loved. I must be approved of.” When you are in social
situations, you are constantly trying to make sure people do not disapprove of
you.""
November 10, 2018 – page 65 
32.18% "So here is the thing... if you laugh about it... it's ain't needy or nice...
...

Just as first you need to clean up few one-liners and punchlines..."
November 10, 2018 – page 65 
32.18% "The problem is that we see ourself as inferior and that's what really fucks us over in the end..."
November 10, 2018 – page 65 
32.18% ""The importance placed in modern society on proving oneʼs worth, on material
success, on status, on measurable achievement is acutely felt by children. To be
loved, accepted, and valued, they must produce the desirable responses. People
are recognized on the basis of what they have produced -- not on who they are.""
November 10, 2018 – page 65 
32.18% ""Maybe you have heard before how inferiority is the result of comparing
yourself to others. If you compare yourself to others and come up short, then you
feel a sense of shame about yourself. Itʼs easy enough for others to tell you to
“stop comparing yourself to others,” but itʼs much more difficult to live that
philosophy.
In the first place, you have been conditioned since childhood to achieve.""
November 10, 2018 – page 65 
32.18% "This book is pointing out deep problems... most people miss them other skip them... but look you suckers... you can't get far without cleaning up the shit before it..."
November 10, 2018 – page 56 
27.72%
November 9, 2018 – page 23 
11.39%
November 9, 2018 – Shelved
November 9, 2018 – Shelved as: to-read
November 9, 2018 – Started Reading"

 

 

 

17 Anti-Procrastination Hacks: How to Stop Being Lazy, Overcome Procrastination, and Finally Get Stuff Done by Dominic Mann

 

 

 

"December 3, 2018 – page 38 
67.86% "We live in a world in which each day there are pleny of new stuff... books... movies... videos
.... things... everyday it happens .... If you start playing the game of catching the most dopy thing... you ain't gonna win for sure.


We see our selfs... important in our priorities... 


With boozy... self-esteem... and mind which is not really interested in doing anything you can't go anywhere, can ya?"
December 3, 2018 – page 38 
67.86% "We live in a world in which each day there are pleny of new stuff... books... movies... videos
.... things... everyday it happens .... If you start playing the game of catching the most dopy thing... you ain't gonna win for sure.


We see our self less... important in our priorities... 


With boozy... self-esteem... and mind which is not really interested in doing anything you can't go anywhere, can ya?"
December 3, 2018 – page 38 
67.86% "The problem with procrastination is that behind that line... there is always a good reason to be in that "state"."
December 3, 2018 – Shelved as: to-read
December 3, 2018 – Shelved
December 3, 2018 – Started Reading"

 

 

 

Higher Status: The New Science of Success and Achievement by Jason Capital

 

 

 

"December 13, 2018 – 
100.0% "We live in society full of distraction... labels... problems...

This books has good great and very valid ideas!"
December 13, 2018 – 
100.0% "This book is great Jason Capital is really very motivating person.. I have been around other works by him snd even programs... Most of his content is very inspiring and the way he present it and say stuff... 


It's High Statute Maintance...


...

This book talks about body language... labels give meaning into our life, how negative friends ruin our lifes and pleny of other cool and very useful data."
December 13, 2018 – 
100.0% "I like throwing away jokes and making people laugh... but the moment I start digging into my life with Transformation Mastery it was fucking suicidal mode... Now as far reading stuff which to improve my mindset, pick up game and etc."
December 13, 2018 – 
100.0% "It took me time, if this matters... I had other stuff to do... pretty not organized life.. . going deeper and deeper and deeper into my life.


Problems come from deep down childgood memories... anger... aggression.. . aggressive... scarcity... sadness all this negative impact fucks your future one way or another way."
December 13, 2018 – page 269 
89.07%
November 26, 2018 – page 238 
78.81%
November 26, 2018 – page 218 
72.19%
November 25, 2018 – page 190 
62.91%
September 13, 2018 – page 156 
51.66% "Why people read shit... and want results!????"
September 13, 2018 – page 156 
51.66% "" “I know this
doesn’t look good, but if I wanted this to mean something
good, what could it mean?” Or, “How would someone
like Alexander the Great or Oprah Winfrey interpret this?”...""
July 18, 2018 – page 150 
49.67% "What we need in this world is a person like Jason Capital always here to motivate you and push you to do lead your path."
July 11, 2018 – page 150 
49.67%
July 11, 2018 – Started Reading
June 29, 2018 – page 136 
45.03%
June 11, 2018 – page 134 
44.37%
May 10, 2018 – page 107 
35.43%
April 22, 2018 – page 62 
20.53% "Time for a life change."
April 22, 2018 – Shelved"

 

Content

1. Empty (Part 1)
2. Empty (Part 2)
3. Introduction
4. Dedication 
5. Videos

 

 

 

Part 1

 

 

1.  Chapter 1 - Accept
2. Chapter 2 - Social Media
3. CHapter 3 - Facts

 

 

Part 2

 

1. Chapter 4 - Social Media (Part 2)

2. Chapter 5 - Comfort Zone (Addict)

3. Chapter 6 - It's Possible

4. Chapter 6.1. - It Stops

5. Chapter 7 - Journal (Journal (Jason Capital Style))

6. Chapter 8 - Shitty

 

 

 

Part 3

 

 

1. Chapter 1 -  Exercise (1) (Question)
2. Chapter 2 -  Exercise (2) (Rules)
3. Chapter 3 - Exercise (3) (Bad Habbits)
4. Chapter 4 - Exercise (4) (Affirmation)
5. Chapter 5 - Exercise (5) (Rules #2)

 

 

Part 4

 

 

1. Chapter 6 - Thoughts
2. Chapter 7 - Good
3. Chapter 8 - Focus
4. Chapter 9 - Truth
5. Chapter 10 - "No" and "Not Feeling It"
6. Chapter 11 - Fear Of Failure
7. Chapter 12 - Fight
8. Chapter 13 - Until The End
9. Chapter 14 - Weakness
10. Chapter 15 - OVERCOMING PROCRASTINATION
11. Chapter 16 - Excuses
12. Chapter 17 -  Vigilant
13. Chapter 18 - Fear
14. Chapter 19 - The Darkness
15. Chapter 20 - Rules To Live By
16. Chapter 21 - OverHelmed.

 

 

 

Part 5

 

 

1. Chapter 1.1. - Success and Failure
2. Chapter 2.1. - Language is Changing Our Lifes
3. Chapter 3.1 - This Book
4. Chapter 4 - Thought Loops and Etc
5. Chapter 5 - Re-Training Brain
6. Chapter 5.1. - Blame (I know the story)
7. Chapter 5.2. - Willigness
8. Chapter 6 - Special
9. Chapter 7 - Attack
10. Chapter 7.1. - Begin
11. Chapter 7.2. - ASSERTIVE VS NARRATIVE
12. Chapter 7.3. - The Way
13. Chapter 7.4. -  Goals
14. Chapter 8 - Today
15. Chapter 9 - Thoughts (So Far)
16. Chapter 10 - Dealing With  Injuries and Illness
17. Chapter 11 - Road Of Warriors
18. Chapter 12.1. - Do
19. Chapter 12.2.  - Everyday
20. Chapter 12.3. - Staying Motivated
21. Chapter 13 - Anxiety
22. Chapter 14 - Motivation (J.C.)
23. Chapter 15 - When
24. Chapter 15.1. - Ask Yourself
25. Chapter 15.2. - Are You Willing
26. Chapter 15.3. - Re-Wire
27. Chapter 16 - Subconscious
28. Chapter 16.1. - Toxicity
29. Chapter 16.2. - Scenes
30. Chapter 16.3.  - Events
31. Chapter 16.4 - Thoughts
32. Chapter 17 - The Game Is Not Over
33. Chapter 18 - Sabotage
34. Chapter 19 - Freedom
35. Chapter 19.1. - Interrupted
36. Chapter 19.2. - Risk
37. Chapter 19.3. - Opression
38. Chapter 19.4.  - (...)
39. Chapter 19.5. - Fear Rip Us
40. Chapter 19.6. - RelentLess
41. Chapter 20  - Resistance

 

 

 

 

Introduction

People like Bob Proctor, Earl Nightingale and Napoleon Hill. Such people can give you hope

and basic ground on which you gonna play. It's going to be like a playground which you gonna use to experiment
and to try stuff and do stuff and so on and so on.

 

The irony of mind is that remembers negative and positive stuff is more hard to remember it, which is fucked up as
hell. Such behavior and such type of mindset ruins pleny of our world. Probably there are going to be dark days full of
depression, days in which you don't know what to do, days full of anxiety, days in which you can't talk to people, days in
which you are just as fucked up as deeply depressed, days in which you are lazy, days in which you are bored.

 

Life continues... the fucking life continues you could be spinning around negative thought loops. Your days could be lazy as
fuck as staying one place and not doing pleny of shit, you could be bored as fuck which means doing pleny shit reading books,
talking, listening and still bored. You could have anxiety which means somebody is on to you... it means that your life isn't
peaceful.

 

Porn is fucked up addiction, if you have started watching porn or if you stopped have in mind that you could be back... you
could have this addiction bad, if you have bad habbits and you return to them you of course you gonna get on track of porn.
Porn provides pleny of types of porn categories blowjob, scissoring, handjob, feetjob, frech kiss, BDSM, lesbians, gay,
shemales, tranies, role playing, dick massaging, cum on the hair, cum on her whole body, cum on her feet, cum on her face,
facial porn, cum on the hands, eating semen.... and etc.

 

The categories could go and go and go and go... and probably
somewhere around this categories which I said... your mind is going to get wired for porn. Mind is so easy, if you don't have
a good life going out there, under good life I mean a life full healthy habbits, talking to people, having friends, don't
having approach anxiety, relationship. You are 1000% screw up, because with bad habbits on the track and bad addictions
come....

 

If you had a healthy habbit probably you could be spinning around your head not fucked up conflicts or argunments. You could
have in your head thoughts like positive loops... positve mindsets. But healthy habbits are not easy to follow in days in
which you just are lazy... few days of this laziness... few days of being bored... and life is spinning around wheels of
negaivity. Blaming yourself on past events, blaming yourself about present events, blaming yourself about stuff you did or
you didn't do, blaming yourself for stuff which you are suppossed to do.

Blame could start from jerk off and masturbating routines, let's assume that this which you know about masturbation and jerk
off is wrong... it's fucking wrong... it doesn't make you less guilty because after all it makes you addicted to pictures and
videos. Probably addicted to music and reading books while being outside... but let's face it you are missing pleny of good
shit probably you could have meet some cool person, or probably you could be having sex or you could have gotten a new
friend. Out of this less social skilled people you have in your friend circle.

 

Now probably it's time when you blame yourself, but the truth is here music is good people use it for relaxation, books
great... fucking great that you have build a habbit which 50% people have difficult to do and the other people just have
difficult to follow their routines... like they do it once, twice, tripple and there are days like ...

 

uhhh... not interested... just not fucking interested. Life is harsh Louis CK - have masturbating problems, Jim Norton - Has
a very fucked up mind... his mind is screw up we live in a society in which we can be easily screw up. Too much porn causes shitty fantasies. If you are fan of diseases and death you got a screw up mind.

If you watch too much dating system and how to date women, how to talk, about what to talk, how to do it, when to do it and etc. Probably you have already alienated yourself... you feel like an alien. If you have started comparing yourself with others... like this model is more sexy than me... this guy is way more cooler than me, this person is having fucking awesome life. Facebook, Instagram, Twitter!
Such websites... start making you feel more miserable... more lonly and we are talking here for deep cloudy days.

Empty (1)

 “Believe in yourself! Have faith in your abilities! Without a humble but reasonable confidence in your own powers you cannot be successful or happy.” —Norman Vincent Peale

 

 

“Where there is a will, there is a way. If there is a chance in a million that you can do something, anything, to keep what you want from ending, do it. Pry the door open or, if need be, wedge your foot in that door and keep it open.” —Pauline Kael

 

 

"Life is not about getting worried over and over and over and over..."   — DeYtH Banger

 

"Comfort zone... A zone in which drugs start to take a role... stress, depression watching others what they do and you start criticism."  

— DeYtH Banger

 

 

 

“Do not wait; the time will never be ‘just right.’Start where you stand, and work with whatever tools you may have at your command, and better tools will be found as you go along.” —George Herbert

 

 

 

Empty (2)

 “Press forward. Do not stop, do not linger in your journey, but strive for the mark set before you.” —George Whitefield

 

 

“The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams.” —Eleanor Roosevelt

 

 

“Don’t watch the clock; do what it does. Keep going.” —Sam Levenson

 

 

"Life is not for the weakest people, it's for the people who keep going and keep going."  —DeYtH Banger

 

 

"There will be obstacles. There will be doubters. There will be mistakes. But with hard work, there are no limits.” —Michael Phelps

 

 

 “DON’T THINK. DO.”  —Jocko Willink

 

“You don’t “find” time to do what is important. You MAKE TIME. GO.”  —Jocko Willink

 

“Blah blah blah blah DO WORK.”  —Jocko Willink

 

“A leader must be aggressive but not overbearing.”  —Jocko Willink

 

“I’m not saying 0430 is for everyone. But if your sleeping until 10 every day, get used to losing.”  —Jocko Willink

 

“You’re not going to find happiness. You have to make it. So get out there and make some happiness.”   —Jocko Willink

 

 

“A leader must be attentive to details but not obsessed with them.”  —Jocko Willink

 

 

“A leader must be brave but not foolhardy.”  —Jocko Willink

 

 

 

 

 

 

Dedication

 To all people who now see no purpose for living... and now they are on the edge...

They could now do:

 

1) Sill stuff (Like going and killing somebody)

 

or

 

2) Or Suicide from depression

 

 

Videos

 1) Click

2) Click

Part 1

 I was about to kill myself

...

1) The first thought was that I don't like life
    - The second... I don't deserv to live

 

 

...

UNtil

 

 

(Don't choose suicide... just try to follow me... in this book.)

 

 

Chapter 1 - Accept

 Accept the person who you are, accept that.

 

...

You should accept yourself you are different and that's what makes you.

 

...

You are not:

 

1) Robin Williams

2) James Bond

3) Bruce Lee

4) Jackie Chan

5) Brad Pitt

6) Morgan Freeman

 

 

or Even

 

7) Tom Hanks

 

 

 

- You can learn from them... they continued to pursue their dreams... they wanted something out of life and they got what they wanted.

 

And "You" 

 

Dear "You"

 

YOu want to be like others... to be accepted... 

 

But sorry.. . this is not a good idea... fitting somewhere means becoming somebody else.

 

 

 

 

NOT YOU


BUT SOMEBODY ELSE

 

 

 

 

                                  

NOT YOU


BUT SOMEBODY ELSE

 

 

 

NOT YOU


BUT SOMEBODY ELSE

 

 

 

NOT YOU


BUT SOMEBODY ELSE

 

 

 

 

 

NOT YOU


BUT SOMEBODY ELSE

 

 

NOT YOU


BUT SOMEBODY ELSE

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Life is not about putting on glasses or even a mask... or a hat... and 

 

forget all about all other things

 

 

life is not social media

 

...

 

Life was created so all other people to can express themselfs... not to hide their personality just somebody to accept them.

 

 

...

 

 

LIFE IS NOT HIDING THE TRUTH... IF YOU TRY TO HIDE IT... YOU ARE ALREADY SOMEBODY ELSE... NOT YOU... BUT SOMEBODY ELSE

 

 

...

 

SO NOW WHO IS LIVING YOUR LIFE?

 

 

yoU OR SOMEBODY ELSE?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Chapter 2 - Social Media

 It won't improve your social skills...

 

In such place you can be everyone

 

 

You can:

 

• Use fake images
• Become somebody else
• Fake Data
• Fake Everything
• Fake what you like
• Try to be everyone but no you

 

 

Emojies - Don't express human  emotions

Happy images - Don't really show how we really feel

Like, sharing - Just starving for few minutes of attention

 

 

                                      

Emojies - Don't express human  emotions

Happy images - Don't really show how we really feel

Like, sharing - Just starving for few minutes of attention

 

 

Emojies - Don't express human  emotions

Happy images - Don't really show how we really feel

Like, sharing - Just starving for few minutes of attention

 

 

 

 

 

 

Emojies - Don't express human  emotions

Happy images - Don't really show how we really feel

Like, sharing - Just starving for few minutes of attention

 

 

Emojies - Don't express human  emotions

Happy images - Don't really show how we really feel

Like, sharing - Just starving for few minutes of attention

 

 

 

 

Emojies - Don't express human  emotions

Happy images - Don't really show how we really feel

Like, sharing - Just starving for few minutes of attention

 

 

 

 

- Social Media causes anxiety, getting anxious... not always somebody replies after your message..

 

 

it could be

 

 

• 5 Minutes wait
• 10 Minutes Wait
• 20 Minutes Wait
• 35 Minutes Wait
• 1 Hour Wait
• More than 1 hour Wait
• More than 4 Hour Wait

 

 

And while that happens:

 

 

DAMAGE!

 

 

 

Instagram is the worst social media network for mental health and wellbeing, according to a recent survey of almost 1,500 teens and young adults. While the photo-based platform got points for self-expression and self-identity, it was also associated with high levels of anxiety, depression, bullying and FOMO, or the “fear of missing out.”

Out of five social networks included in the survey, YouTube received the highest marks for health and wellbeing and was the only site that received a net positive score by respondents. Twitter came in second, followed by Facebook and then Snapchat—with Instagram bringing up the rear.

 

The #StatusOfMind survey, published by the United Kingdom’s Royal Society for Public Health, included input from 1,479 young people (ages 14 to 24) from across England, Scotland, Wales and Northern Ireland. From February through May of this year, people answered questions about how different social media platforms impacted 14 different issues related to their mental or physical health.

There were certainly some benefits associated with social networking. All of the sites received positive scores for self-identity, self-expression, community building and emotional support, for example. YouTube also got high marks for bringing awareness of other people’s health experiences, for providing access to trustworthy health information and for decreasing respondents’ levels of depression, anxiety, and loneliness.

 

 

But they all received negative marks, as well—especially for sleep quality, bullying, body image and FOMO. And unlike YouTube, the other four networks were associated with increases in depression and anxiety.

Previous studies have suggested that young people who spend more than two hours a day on social networking sites are more likely to report psychological distress. “Seeing friends constantly on holiday or enjoying nights out can make young people feel like they are missing out while others enjoy life,” the #StatusOfMind report states. “These feelings can promote a ‘compare and despair’ attitude.”

Social media posts can also set unrealistic expectations and create feelings of inadequacy and low self-esteem, the authors wrote. This may explain why Instagram, where personal photos take center stage, received the worst scores for body image and anxiety. As one survey respondent wrote, “Instagram easily makes girls and women feel as if their bodies aren’t good enough as people add filters and edit their pictures in order for them to look ‘perfect’.”

 

 

 

Other research has found that the more social networks a young adult uses, the more likely he or she is to report depression and anxiety. Trying to navigate between different norms and friend networks on various platforms could be to blame, study authors say—although it’s also possible that people with poor mental health are drawn to multiple social-media platforms in the first place.

To reduce the harmful effects of social media on children and young adults, the Royal Society is calling for social media companies to make changes. The report recommends the introduction of a pop-up “heavy usage” warning within these apps or website—something 71% of survey respondents said they’d support.

 

It also recommends that companies find a way to highlight when photos of people have been digitally manipulated, as well as identify and offer help to users who could be suffering from mental health problems. (A feature rolled out on Instagram last year allowing users to anonymously flag troublesome posts.)

 

The government can also help, the report states. It calls for “safe social media use” to be taught during health education in schools, for professionals who work with youth to be trained in digital and social media and for more research to be conducted on the effects of social media on mental health.

The Royal Society hopes to empower young adults to use social networks “in a way that protects and promotes their health and wellbeing,” the report states. “Social media isn’t going away soon, nor should it. We must be ready to nurture the innovation that the future holds.”

 

 

 

Note: All this sites/apps and programs put you to become somebody who you aren't

 

 

YOu don't want that... but

 

 

Using Social Media is Causing Anxiety, Stress and Depression

 

 

 

Note: Life is not about putting glass and forggetting that eye contact exists

 

 

Depression

 

The idea that social media can be dangerous is not new. I think on some level we all know that it can cause us stress and anxiety.

We fret about how we look in pictures and how our comments sound. We worry that other people are having more fun and doing more things. We wish our last picture got more likes.

But we continue to consume it all day, every day, because in the end, we assume that the dangers are overblown. We assume that social media is mostly harmless.

 

 

 

Meet Madison Holleran

 

A freshman at the University of Pennsylvania and a star athlete, she was intelligent and talented and successful. Everyone she knew said she was happy.

Advertisement

But in her very first semester away from home she started to feel anxious and depressed. With her best friend she would scroll through Instagram and think, “This is what college is supposed to be like; this is what we want our life to be like,” ESPN reported.

In January of 2014 Madison killed herself. Since then ESPN has investigated the role social media played in her death and in aggravating her anxiety and depression.

 

 

That’s Just One Story

 

Of course, there are millions of other college students just like Madison. Anxiety is now the number one mental health problem on campuses across the country, and therapists are becoming increasingly concerned about social media making things worse.

Cyberbullying and harassment, comparing their lives to classmates, fearing they’re missing out – social media contributes to anxiety and depression in all sorts of different ways. And the more we consume, the more problems it can cause.

 

 

 

It’s Not Just College Students That Need to WorryAdvertisement

 

Yet the dangers go far beyond college classrooms. These days everyone is consuming social media, from 13 to 93-year-olds. No one is immune. Here are some of the biggest concerns researchers have found so far:

 

1. Time spent on social media is correlated with depression

 

Researchers have found that the longer you spend on social media, the more likely you are to be depressed. Other surveys have found that using Facebook and Twitter less helps students to be more focused and less stressed. We can debate the reasons why there is a correlation, it could be that people who are already depressed are likely to spend more time on social media. But the correlation is still troubling, especially when you read a story like Madison’s.

 

 

 

2. Social media is incredibly addictive

 

Once you get on Facebook, it’s hard to stop. Most Americans check it once a day, if not multiple times. Likes and comments can serve as positive reinforcement, making it even more difficult to stop. Some researchers have even created a scale called The Bergen Facebook Addiction Scale to measure this behaviour.

 

3. It can make you unhappy, unsatisfied, and restless

 

A study out of the University of Michigan has found that people who use Facebook more, are more likely to be unhappy than people who use it less. Similarly, those avid users also said they were less satisfied with their lives overall.

This could be because people often compare their real lives to idealized versions of their friends’ lives online. People post a lot of smiling pictures and not so many sad ones.

A different study out of the UK found that two-thirds of people now have trouble relaxing when they can’t access their social media accounts. This is especially troubling because it means that Facebook and Twitter are affecting people even when they’re offline.

In the end, there’s no doubt that there are a lot of benefits to social media. You get to share happy memories and photos and stories. You have access to all kinds of information and recipes. It really is amazing.

Just don’t forget that there are also very real dangers to social media. Ones that we are all too willing to ignore at times.

 

 

 

 

 

Chapter 3 - Facts

1.  Women are approximately two times more likely than men to suffer from major depression.
2. Placebos are 31% to 38% effective in treating depression, compared to 46% to 54% for antidepressants.
3. Depression can cause you to dream up to 3 to 4 times morethan you normally would.
4. Severe Depression can cause us to biologically age more by increasing the aging process in cells.
5. 1 in 8 adolescents in the U.S. have clinical depression.
6. Research conducted on comedians and funny people have shown they are usually more depressed than average.
7. 10 times more peoplesuffer frommajor depressionnow than in 1945.
8. People who spend a lot of time on the internet are more likely to be depressed, lonely and mentally unstable, a study found.
9. Sigmund Freud recommended Cocaineas treatment for depression, alcoholism, and morphine addiction.
10. Gratitude can boost dopamineand serotonin, just like antidepressants.
11. Moderate exercise can not only treat but actually preventepisodes of depression in the long term.

Part 2

Dive Deeper

Chapter 4 - Social Media (Part 2)

How To Tell If Social Media Is Giving You Anxiety

 

 

 

With around half of the Australian population logging into Facebook on a daily basis (yes, that's 12.2 million of us), it's safe to say social media plays a large role in many of our everyday lives.

Of course, while there are numerous benefits to social media use, what you get out of it corresponds rather directly to how you choose to use it. And for some, social media has ceased being a fun pastime and has become a source of great anxiety.

"What you're dealing with is when people are almost fearful of being on social media," Amanda Lambros, Clinical Fellow in the Faculty of Health Sciences at Curtin University tells HuffPost Australia.

"Their bodies display symptoms of anxiety when they go to check Facebook or Twitter or anything like that. Even opening the application causes that level of anxiety.

"Social media can become extremely addictive in our lives, and also can be damaging depending on how you use it. It's one of those things that has the power to benefit you, or have really negative effect, depending on how it's used."

While 'social media anxiety' isn't an established clinical term, social media in itself has been recognised by many mental health consultants as an 'anxiety-provoking factor', both when users are on and off the site.

 

 

"People who use social media often do report that at certain times when using social media, they have a psychological reaction," Dr Bridianne O'Dea, research fellow at the Black Dog Institute tells HuffPost Australia.

"Some things they might experience when they are using it directly in that point of time, so they might see something and this could trigger a reaction, or alternatively when they're not using it. So their feelings are around having not checked it or being very conscious of what's happening on social media when they're not on the site."

On one hand you want to avoid it, but on the other hand you still need to get on and see what's happening.Amanda Lambros

 

"We see people who get addicted to the likes or reading the comments," Lambros says. "They are opening [an application] up and are already anticipating that something is going to happen or has happened since they last logged on.

"They may experience sweaty palms or generally not feeling well, or get a weird tingling feeling in their gut. There can be a redness on the chest which creeps up your neck and onto your cheeks.

"There's a feeling of wanting to avoid it at all costs. Or, more accurately, on one hand you want to avoid it, but on the other hand you still need to get on and see what's happening."

 

 

Or the signs might be less physically obvious, but still affect your overall mood.

"One thing you can do, and it's a basic thing, is to see how you feel before you go on social media and how you feel after," O'Dea suggests.

"That can be a really good way to check in and see if you are feeling like the stuff you are seeing or being exposed to on social media is making you feel worse about yourself or the world or your network.

"If you're finding that it is -- and usually you might track it across a number of different instances -- you might want to ask yourself some questions. 'What do I think about social media that is making me feel this way? Is it the content I am exposed to? Is it looking at certain people's posts, or news, or is it what's in my feed?'

"One of the steps you can take is limiting your feed. So if you identify there are certain posts that make you upset or make you worry, you can choose to limit the posts. And that's always a good strategy."

The pull of the connection is so much stronger than being able to disconnect.

Both Lambros and O'Dea state taking a break from social media altogether can also be beneficial, while noting in reality, it can prove extremely difficult to do.

"If it's causing you so much discomfort, you could try to avoid it," Lambros says. "Though saying that and doing it is totally different things. The pull of the connection is so much stronger than being able to disconnect."

Rather than going offline completely, O'Dea suggests looking at ways to limit your social media interaction.

"Some people have reported they take the apps off their phone, and have found that helpful," she said. "So they are still part of Facebook and can still check it while they are at their desktop, but they can't check it when they are on their phone. That can be a way to limit your use and monitor your use."

 

 

Finally, if you feel like social media is affecting your life negatively in more way than one, the best solution could be to seek professional advice.

"There might be times where you find yourself really thinking about the content you have seen and really comparing yourself to it and making negative self comparisons," O'Dea says. "When that starts to happen and it starts to be prolonged, so you find yourself doing it on more than one occasion, that can potentially lead to detrimental impacts on your mental health.

"The minute you understand it's impacting an area of your life -- so if you're not able to go to work, not able to socialise -- my advice would be to go and speak to someone about it," adds Lambros.

"It's better to seek help earlier rather than later. And if you find yourself feeling embarrassed and thinking, 'this is just too stupid to talk about so I just won't mention it,' then in reality that's probably the best time to get help."

 

 

P.S.

 

- Stop Worrying

- Stop Staying home

- Stop doing the same things (The results are the same)

- Try something new

- Life can be more than what you see

- Try to go out of the box

 

 

Social Media Obsession and Anxiety

 

 

 

Sarah Fader is the CEO and Founder of Stigma Fighters, a non-profit organization that encourages individuals with mental illness to share their personal stories. She has been featured in The New York Times, The Washington Post, The Atlantic, Quartz, Psychology Today, The Huffington Post, HuffPost Live, and Good Day New York. 

 

Sarah is a native New Yorker who enjoys naps, talking to strangers, and caring for her two small humans and two average-sized cats. Like six million other Americans, Sarah lives with panic disorder. Through Stigma Fighters, Sarah hopes to change the world, one mental health stigma at a time.

 

Do you get anxious when you cannot check your Facebook or Twitter account? Believe it or not, that is a real disorder. Social media anxiety disorder is a mental health condition that is similar to social anxiety disorder. In fact, anxiety disorders are the most common mental health disorders in the United States. It seems that the more technology we acquire, the more stressed out we become. According to the experts, almost 20% of people with social media accounts cannot go more than three hours without checking them. So, what is social media anxiety disorder?

Most people who have social media accounts do not get nervous or stressed out when they are not able to check their notifications every five minutes. However, for those who have social media anxiety disorder, just being away from their Facebook or Twitter account for a few minutes can cause severe anxiety. Here are some of the most common symptoms of social media anxiety disorder:

 

 

• Interrupting conversations to check your social media accounts
• Lying to others about how much time you spend on social media
• Withdrawal from friends and family 
• Trying to stop or reduce your use of social media more than once before without being successful
• Loss of interest in other activities
• Neglecting work or school to comment on Facebook or Twitter account
• Experiencing withdrawal symptoms when you are not able to access social media 
• Spending over six hours per day on social networking sites like Facebook, Twitter, or Instagram
• Overwhelming need to share things with others on social media sites
• Having your phone with you 24 hours a day to check your social media sites
• Using social media more often than you planned
• Severe nervousness or anxiety when you are not able to check your notifications
• Negative impacts in your personal or professional life due to social media usage

 

Overall, about 30% of those who use social media spend more than 15 hours per week online. This can greatly reduce your ability to enjoy real life. It can also cost you relationships, jobs, and an education if you spend too much time online. If you are spending several hours a day on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram, you are not going to have enough time to work, study, or spend time with loved ones. You may have social media anxiety disorder and it can also affect your health, both physically and mentally. 

 

Physical Risks of Social Media Addiction

 

Spending too much time online has been proven to cause illnesses such as eye strain, neck pain, and lower back problems. In addition, the sedentary way we sit around and “talk” to people on Facebook can cause physical illnesses such as obesity, heart disease, nutrition problems, and a risk of stroke and certain kinds of cancers. 

 

Mental Health Issues Caused by Social Media Addiction

 

Researchers have found that using social media obsessively causes more than just anxiety. In fact, testing has found that using too much internet can cause depression, attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD), impulsive disorder, problems with mental functioning, paranoia, and loneliness. It is more than just the pressure of sharing things with others, it is also about how you may be comparing your life with others you see on Facebook. Many people see that someone on Facebook who has a great job, excellent husband, and beautiful home and they feel happy for them. But, others can feel jealous, depressed, or may even feel suicidal about their own life if it is not as “perfect” as those they see on Facebook. 

 

What You Can Do

 

First of all, just realize that many people who post all that great stuff on Facebook have a normal life just like you and me but they only put the good stuff on Facebook. If your life is not as awesome as some of the people you see on Facebook, it is not going to get any better by sitting there obsessing over it. You have to get out and enjoy your real life, not your social media “life” because that is not a real life. If you are having trouble doing this or you just need to talk to someone, there are people who can help you with this. You do not have to have an appointment or even leave your home to do it. Talk to an online therapist or counselor now and you can feel better by tomorrow.

 

 

Social media aka Bad

 

 

 

Three billion people, around 40% of the world’s population, use online social media – and we’re spending an average of two hours every day sharing, liking, tweeting and updating on these platforms, according to some reports. That breaks down to around half a million tweets and Snapchat photos shared every minute. 

 

With social media playing such a big part in our lives, could we be sacrificing our mental health and well-being as well as our time? What does the evidence actually suggest?

 

• Facebook responds to mental well-being claims

• Is it time to rethink how we use social media? An introduction to our #LikeMinded season

 

Since social media is relatively new to us, conclusive findings are limited. The research that does exist mainly relies on self-reporting, which can often be flawed, and the majority of studies focus on Facebook. That said, this is a fast-growing area of research, and clues are beginning to emerge. BBC Future reviewed the findings of some of the science so far:

 

STRESS

 

People use social media to vent about everything from customer service to politics, but the downside to this is that our feeds often resemble an endless stream of stress. In 2015, researchers at the Pew Research Center based in Washington DC sought to find out if social media induces more stress than it relieves.  

In the survey of 1,800 people, women reported being more stressed than men. Twitter was found to be a “significant contributor” because it increased their awareness of other people’s stress.

But Twitter also acted as a coping mechanism – and the more women used it, the less stressed they were. The same effect wasn’t found for men, whom the researchers said had a more distant relationship with social media. Overall, the researchers concluded that social media use was linked to “modestly lower levels” of stress.

 

 

MOOD

 

In 2014, researchers in Austria found that participants reported lower moods after using Facebook for 20 minutes compared to those who just browsed the internet. The study suggested that people felt that way because they saw it as a waste of time.

A good or bad mood may also spread between people on social media, according to researchers from the University of California, who assessed the emotional content of over a billion status updates from more than 100 million Facebook users between 2009 and 2012.

Bad weather increased the number of negative posts by 1%, and the researchers found that one negative post by someone in a rainy city influenced another 1.3 negative posts by friends living in dry cities. The better news is that happy posts had a stronger influence; each one inspired 1.75 more happy posts. Whether a happy post translates to a genuine boost in mood, however, remains unclear.

 

ANXIETY

 

Researchers have looked at general anxiety provoked by social media, characterised by feelings of restlessness and worry, and trouble sleeping and concentrating. A study published in the journal Computers and Human Behaviour found that people who report using seven or more social media platforms were more than three times as likely as people using 0-2 platforms to have high levels of general anxiety symptoms. 

That said, it’s unclear if and how social media causes anxiety. Researchers from Babes-Bolyai University in Romania reviewed existing research on the relationship between social anxiety and social networking in 2016, and said the results were mixed. They concluded that more research needs to be done.

   

 

DEPRESSION

 

While some studies have found a link between depression and social media use, there is emerging research into how social media can actually be a force for good.  

Two studies involving more than 700 students found that depressive symptoms, such as low mood and feelings of worthlessness and hopelessness, were linked to the quality of online interactions. Researchers found higher levels of depressive symptoms among those who reported having more negative interactions.

A similar study conducted in 2016 involving 1,700 people found a threefold risk of depression and anxiety among people who used the most social media platforms. Reasons for this, they suggested, include cyber-bullying, having a distorted view of other people’s lives, and feeling like time spent on social media is a waste.

However, as BBC Future will explore this month in our #LikeMinded season, scientists are also looking at how social media can be used to diagnose depression, which could help people receive treatment earlier. Researchers for Microsoft surveyed 476 people and analysed their Twitter profiles for depressive language, linguistic style, engagement and emotion. From this, they developed a classifier that can accurately predict depression before it causes symptoms in seven out of 10 cases.

Researchers from Harvard and Vermont Universities analysed 166 people’s Instagram photos to create a similar tool last year with the same success rate.

 

SLEEP

 

Humans used to spend their evenings in darkness, but now we’re surrounded by artificial lighting all day and night. Research has found that this can inhibit the body’s production of the hormone melatonin, which facilitates sleep – and blue light, which is emitted by smartphone and laptop screens, is said to be the worst culprit. In other words, if you lie on the pillow at night checking Facebook and Twitter, you’re headed for restless slumber.

Last year, researchers from the University of Pittsburgh asked 1,700 18- to 30-year-olds about their social media and sleeping habits. They found a link with sleep disturbances – and concluded blue light had a part to play. How often they logged on, rather than time spent on social media sites, was a higher predictor of disturbed sleep, suggesting “an obsessive ‘checking’”, the researchers said.

The researchers say this could be caused by physiological arousal before sleep, and the bright lights of our devices can delay circadian rhythms. But they couldn’t clarify whether social media causes disturbed sleep, or if those who have disturbed sleep spend more time on social media.  

 

 

ADDICTION

 

Despite the argument from a few researchers that tweeting may be harder to resist than cigarettes and alcohol, social media addiction isn’t included in the latest diagnostic manual for mental health disorders.

That said, social media is changing faster than scientists can keep up with, so various groups are trying to study compulsive behaviours related to its use – for example, scientists from the Netherlands have invented their own scale to identify possible addiction.

And if social media addiction does exist, it would be a type of internet addiction – and that is a classified disorder. In 2011, Daria Kuss and Mark Griffiths from Nottingham Trent University in the UK have analysed 43 previous studies on the matter, and conclude that social media addiction is a mental health problem that “may” require professional treatment. They found that excessive usage was linked to relationship problems, worse academic achievement and less participation in offline communities, and found that those who could be more vulnerable to a social media addiction include those dependent on alcohol, the highly extroverted, and those who use social media to compensate for fewer ties in real life. 

 

SELF-ESTEEM

 

Women’s magazines and their use of underweight and Photoshopped models have been long maligned for stirring self-esteem issues among young women. But now, social media, with its filters and lighting and clever angles, is taking over as a primary concern among some campaigning groups and charities.

Social media sites make more than half of users feel inadequate, according to a survey of 1,500 people by disability charity Scope, and half of 18- to 34-year-olds say it makes them feel unattractive.

A 2016 study by researchers at Penn State University suggested that viewing other people’s selfies lowered self-esteem, because users compare themselves to photos of people looking their happiest. Research from the University of Strathclyde, Ohio University and University of Iowa also found that women compare themselves negatively to selfies of other women.

 

 

But it’s not just selfies that have the potential to dent self-esteem. A study of 1,000 Swedish Facebook users found that women who spent more time on Facebook reported feeling less happy and confident. The researchers concluded: “When Facebook users compare their own lives with others’ seemingly more successful careers and happy relationships, they may feel that their own lives are less successful in comparison.”

But one small study hinted that viewing your own profile, not others, might offer ego boosts. Researchers at Cornell University in New York put 63 students into different groups. Some sat with a mirror placed against a computer screen, for instance, while others sat in front of their own Facebook profile.

Facebook had a positive effect on self-esteem compared to other activities that boost self-awareness. Mirrors and photos, the researchers explained, make us compare ourselves to social standards, whereas looking at our own Facebook profiles might boost self-esteem because it is easier to control how we’re presented to the world.

 

WELL-BEING

 

In a study from 2013, researchers texted 79 participants five times a day for 14 days, asking them how they felt and how much they’d used Facebook since the last text. The more time people spent on the site, the worse they felt later on, and the more their life satisfaction declined over time.

But other research has found, that for some people, social media can help boost their well-being. Marketing researchers Jonah Berger and Eva Buechel found that people who are emotionally unstable are more likely to post about their emotions, which can help them receive support and bounce back after negative experiences.

Overall, social media’s effects on well-being are ambiguous, according to a paper written last year by researchers from the Netherlands. However, they suggested there is clearer evidence for the impact on one group of people: social media has a more negative effect on the well-being of those who are more socially isolated. 

 

 

Note: This is just the beginning... there is and more and more

 

 

the problem isn't in you ... the problem is in searching for a comfort zone...

 

...

 

 

and comfort zone puts ... in HELL

 

 

 

RELATIONSHIPS

 

If you’ve ever been talking to a friend who’s pulled their phone out to scroll through Instagram, you might have wondered what social media is doing to relationships.

Even the mere presence of a phone can interfere with our interactions, particularly when we’re talking about something meaningful, according to one small study. Researchers writing in the Journal of Social and Personal Relationships tasked 34 pairs of strangers with having a 10-minute conversation about an interesting event that had happened to them recently. Each pair sat in private booths, and half had a mobile phone on the top of their table.

Those with a phone in eyeshot were less positive when recalling their interaction afterwards, had less meaningful conversations and reported feeling less close to their partner than the others, who had a notebook on top of the table instead.

Romantic relationships aren’t immune, either. Researchers at the University of Guelph in Canada surveyed 300 people aged 17-24 in 2009 about any jealousy they felt when on Facebook, asking questions such as, ‘How likely are you to become jealous after your partner has added an unknown member of the opposite sex?’.

Women spent much more time on Facebook then men, and experienced significantly more jealousy when doing so. The researchers concluded they “felt the Facebook environment created these feelings and enhanced concerns about the quality of their relationship”.

 

 

ENVY

 

In a study involving 600 adults, roughly a third said social media made them feel negative emotions – mainly frustration – and envy was the main cause. This was triggered by comparing their lives to others’, and the biggest culprit was other people’s travel photos. Feeling envious caused an “envy spiral”, where people react to envy by adding to their profiles more of the same sort of content that made them jealous in the first place.

However, envy isn’t necessarily a destructive emotion – it can often make us work harder, according to researchers from Michigan University and the University of Wisconsin-Milwaukee. They asked 380 students to look at “envy-eliciting” photos and texts from Facebook and Twitter, including posts about buying expensive goods, travelling and getting engaged. But the type of envy the researchers found is “benign envy”, which they say is more likely to make a person work harder.

 

LONELINESS

 

A study published in the American Journal of Preventive Medicine last year surveyed 7,000 19- to 32-year-olds and found that those who spend the most time on social media were twice as likely to report experiencing social isolation, which can include a lack of a sense of social belonging, engagement with others and fulfilling relationships.

Spending more time on social media, the researchers said, could displace face-to-face interaction, and can also make people feel excluded.

“Exposure to such highly idealised representations of peers’ lives may elicit feelings of envy and the distorted belief that others lead happier and more successful lives, which may increase perceived social isolation.”

 

Chapter 5 - Comfort Zone (Addict)

Comfort Zone = Becoming Addict

 

 

YOu feel the need to escalete... your depressive behavior... in home... thats when you start fulfilling your life with drugs.

 

...

The simple escalation!

 

 

 

Chapter 6 - It's Possible

 It's possible to become somebody's friend... to start living a social life... and there is life outisde home...

 

 

NO ZOMBIES AT ALL

 

 

 

...

Just go out... and have fun

 

...

Stop with:

 

 

1. Thinking
2. Living in your head
3. Stopping yourself from doing it
4. Too Much thinking
5. Too much overthinking
6. Too Much seeing yourself as a shit (DOn't see yourself as a shit)

 

...

 

1. Stop obsession
2. Stop Anxiety

 

...

Try to do something

 

...

Stop staying there

 

 

...

Little win, wins... are going to help you  throw the day...

 

...

Today: Do something

 

...

If you do it... write it down... this is going to inspire you for tomorrow "Win" and the other tomorrows "WINS"

Chapter 6.1. - It Stops

 What stops us from doing anything is 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Are the fucking thoughts... if you give them too much space in your life

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Why should we allow thoughts to stop us from results?
...

Why do we give so much space to thoughts?

 

 

...

STOP  THINKING

 

...

Today is a day in which

 

 

you gonna give

 

less excuses to your wants... and more excuses to what you should

 

...

 

 

 

Chapter 7 - Journal (Journal (Jason Capital Style))

 Note: It's very useful to journal stuff... write down your emotion... your progress.. how life is going.... write it down... then try to sort out things and chunks by chunks you gonna fix problems and also improve other aspects in your life.

 

 

Example: This is how it looks a journal based upon the advice of Jason CapitCapital - Dating coach. First have in mind if you find a good quote or something useful highlight it... or write it down.

....









I should be happy


1) I learnt a new skill
2) I started learning new skills
3) I went out of my comfoth zone
4) I fail… but never put it for "later".
5) I keep results


….


1) Today I had a chat with bunch of girls it went well
2) Yesterday I was for few minutes a public speaker
3) Yesterday I had success in chatting with women
4) Yesterday I made some new friends
5) Today I had a chat with random people
6) Today I was in state of happiness and care freeness.



….

Day 2


…


1) Today I had a chat with new people
2) I did what I can
3) I learn new skills
4) I had few chats with girls… it went pretty well with smile on their face


Day 4-5


1) Going toward my Path
2) Less FUCK
3) More fun
4) More Challenging
5) Don't giving a fuck


Day 7,8,9,10,11,12

1) Learning new Skills
2) Learnt new jokes
3) Finishing TV Series
4) Learning new things aboit Seduction
5) Joining RSD Community
6) Going to A Party
7) Feeling Carefree (Not giving a fuck to rejections)
8) Going to level which most people haven't gotten
9) Reading new Books about Communication, Body Language and etc.


Day 13,14,15,16,17,18,19


1) Going throw plenty  of material and trying to understand what really happens. (Dive in Deeper Water)

2) Mastering Discipline
3) Getting In Adaptable Behavior/Mood
4) Less questions and theory in field
5) Becoming More Carefree Character
6) Watching Comedy
7) Becoming more naturally Aware and Confident
8) Getting less Depressed and Stressed
9) Improving And Fixing my social Circle

 

 

 

Note: Always people need motivation... or people like me... in my case If I want to do some kinda activity I need somebody to motivate me... if I need to go and stress on it... and focus on it... it's pretty damn hard to do it...

 

 

People are saying I should just "want it"... but it doesn't help....

.... It just puts too much pressure... too much of this ingredient fucks you over.

 

Chapter 8 - Shitty

 It gets shitty once moment you don't know who to follow... because you don't find people with your commonalities... I have those days when people just don't understand me...

 

...

The problem is that it gets fucked up when you focus too much on this... Robin Sharma... has a good way to deal with such shit... 

 

...

Just grab few papers and write down the problems, emotions... negative sides... everything... no need for Lay Reports... - just grab a pen or pencil and write it down... leave it away and once you are feeling great... go outside and start joking about what type of problems you had.

 

 

RSD Julien: Says exaggerate your problems... go over them but and joke and joke and joke... just screw up your problems... i

 

 

 

....

If you want to go over the rough times... and have great time out or in home you need to have ability to laugh about this shitty stuff.

 

...

Note: As for me I learn that lesson in the hard way... but no need for you to learn in the same way... you can learn it from here... it again can help.

 

 

...

Life is shitty

 

- I got money... but I am not happy... I thought that before that I am going to be happy... but "No"... I am not happy... first I fuck with my friends when I have got money, secondly... they  are something like 90-100$.... for  a poor guy like me... it's a lot of... but in the real world... this money aren't a lot of... but I just count it as a lot... because we should be happy with the things which we have... and if we are happy... we are probably one day gonna get more of it.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

- Life for me is like  a video with ... poor people  who are trying to have fun without money... it's kinda impossible.

 

 

Excuses are what fucks around sane persons mind... you can't do it... because this and this is going to happen like for example

...

If I start investing in stocks:

 

- I am going to make a big risk and I am going to lose my money... (THis is Investment Excuse)

...

If I start investing in new areas:

 

- I am fucked up.... I am going to lose again money (Mainly because I don't know anything about this area and it's kinda big risk... one is on a paper or in a book other is in doing it...

 

 

If I start spending time with people I don't know:

 

- I will waste my time.... (It's a big risk and it's between low or high value shitty stuff...)

 

 

People in the living world provide you with plenty of stuff in many quantities.... 

 

Like watching all your life Comedy: - Comedy won't end... this section is endlesss... but you need to have favourite comedians and to watch more from that shit and rarely to go for a new comedian.

 

 

...

But too much comedy one moment fucks you up and it pumps you up with too much positivity and too much of this it's a shitty fucker you stard feeling back-sided effects.

Part 3

 Nothing more than put into action...

Chapter 1 - Exercise (1) (Question)

 I always expect the best, yet I don't care if it don't happen.

 

 

 

Ask yourself this questions... when you wake up...

 

 

 

 

 

 

Why it's so easy for me to get always excited about my life?

 

What Jason Capital is going to do?

 

I wonder what adventure awaits me, right this corner?

 

How this is going to make this such motivating story for somebody else?

 

What I love that I love myself so much?

 

WHat's so fucking fascinating about my life?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

M - Meaning Mind

A - What is really positive angle?

D - What else will I want in other direction?

E - What effective action will I take towards dominating that decision?"

Chapter 2 - Exercise (2) (Rules)

Bill Of Rights Aziz Gazipura Style...

 

 

 

 

"1) I can start conversations with everyone I want.

 

2) I can approach anyone that I want to start conversation.

 

3) I have the right to end the conversation whenever I want.

 

4) I have the right to say "NO", without any given reason.

 

5) I have the right to say what I perceive and think.

 

6) I have the right of to challenge someone and offer different perspective.

 

7) I have the right to ask what I want.

 

8) I have the right to be funny.

 

9) I have the right to make assumptions, it doesn't matter if they are right or wrong.

 

10) I have the right to shout.

 

11) I have the right to ask as much "If's" and "Why's" as I want.

 

12) I will do what I desire.

 

 

Basically you start with "I have the right..." and then continue...

You can remove or add more rights!

Chapter 3 - Exercise (3) (Bad Habbits)

 

If you have ADDICTION start a dialogue

 

 

... try to find the reason for how has it came it could go like:

 

 

DeYtH: Why we go in this cycle?
Mr. Addiction: Because of misery, stress, suicide...
DeYtH: How so?
Mr. Addiction: You are lonely... wit me you got a reason and a goal in life
DeYtH: But I feel guilt because of you
Mr. Addiction: You can't expect "joy" to be perfect
...

 

Note: The idea is to go deeper... Ask "How "..., "Why, What"... "If's" questions... "When, Where"... and you gonna find what is bothering you.

 

 

 

(Very useful if you have porn problems, alcohol troubles stuff like this... most cases Bad Habbits which are effecting you to feel bad about yourself... and constatly happening... aka ADDICTION!)

Chapter 4 - Exercise (4) (Affirmation)

Say this Affirmation!

 

 

 

 

 

 

"I am independent from the good/bad opinions about me.

 

I am fucking awesome.

 

I am fascinating person, people want know me.

 

In investment in them, is a lost in me.

 

I am not going to be sad and dissapointed.

 

I am going to be the person not which I should, but Which I want to be.

 

Leave the freaks... aside.

 

I can do it... FUCK ITTT AND I DON'T CARE.

I did it and I gonna do it again.

 

Yes, I'm hight maintenance. But it's okay because I maintain myself.

 

Wake Up Every morning and tell yourself you are a badass bitch and no one can mess with you and then don't let anyone mess with you.

 

I am the guy who always succeeds.

 

I am love how nature is to feel carefree and dominant.

 

I am grateful for being carefree and I am grateful of everyone long term responds positively to that and is inspired by that.

 

A need for anything, gets on the way for everything.

 

Hot girls looks ... it's fake... it's not real.

 

I am not my thoughts, I am what I do.

 

I'm allowed to make mistakes 

 

     I'm allowed to feel good sometimes 

 

     Anxiety is my bitch 

 

    I don't like these feelings, but they won't hurt me 

      "I'm going to be alrigh"

 

"I Am Willing"

 

"I Am Wired to Win"

 

"I Got This"

 

"I Embrace the Uncertainty"

 

"I Am Relentless"

 

"I am amazing with women, and they love me."

 

"I love myself and so do women."

 

"I approach beautiful women, everywhere I go."

"I am fearless and bold in bars and clubs, fun and exciting people graviatiete towards me."

 

 

Chapter 5 - Exercise (5) (Rules #2)

(Rules: Are Morel ikely things you need to know and to do and to remember... this things are going to help you to go around your day...)

 

 

 

You will not start a day without it being scripted the night before.

 

You will not go on Social Media, except for pre-determined times.

 

You will not unconscious open new tabs.

 

You will turn your phone in air plane more mode when domininating your path.

 

You will not put shotty food in your Ferrari body.

 

You will not let a day pass without affirmation play.

 

You will not start without a pre-determined end time.

Chapter 6 - Game Rules

 You will not start a day without it being scripted the night before.

 

You will not go on Social Media, except for pre-determined times.

 

You will not unconscious open new tabs.

 

You will turn your phone in air plane more mode when domininating your path.

 

You will not put shitty food in your Ferrari body.

 

You will not let a day pass without affirmation play.

 

You will not start without a pre-determined end time

Part 4

 Wrong... Not funny enough!

Chapter 6 - Thoughts

 HESITATION IS THE ENEMY.

 

Hesitation allows the moment to pass, the opportunity to be lost, the enemy to get the upper hand. Hesitation turns into cowardice. It stops us from moving forward, from taking initiative, from executing what we know we must.
Hesitation defeats us. So we must defeat it.

 

- Jocko Willink

      Lead.

Step up. Be the one who people look to.
Absorb the impact—and the negativity.
Draw fire—yes: Draw fire

Chapter 7 - Good

 How do I deal with setbacks, failures, delays, defeats, or other disasters? I actually have a fairly simple way of dealing with these situations, summed up in one word: “Good.”

This is something that one of my direct subordinates, one of the guys who worked for me, a guy who

became one of my best friends, pointed out. He would pull me aside with some major problem or some issue that was going on, and he’d say, “Boss, we’ve got this thing, this situation, and it’s going terribly wrong.”

I would look at him and I’d say:“Good.”

And finally, one day, he was telling me about something that was going off the rails, and as soon as he finished explaining it to me, he said, “I already know what you’re going to say.

And I asked, “What am I going to say?”

And he said, “You’re going to say: ‘Good.’”

He continued, “That’s what you always say. When something is wrong or going bad, you just look at me and say, ‘Good.’”
And I said, “Well. I mean it. Because that is
how I operate.” So I explained to him that when things are going bad, there’s going to be some good that will come from it.
Oh, mission got canceled? Good. We can focus
on another one.

Didn’t get the new high-speed gear we wanted?

                 Good. We can keep it simple.

 

Didn’t get promoted? Good. More time to get better.

Didn’t get funded? Good. We own more of the company.

Didn’t get the job you wanted? Good. Go out, gain more experience, and build a better resume.

 

Got injured? Good. Needed a break from training

 

Got tapped out? Good. It’s better to tap out in training than to tap out on the street.

Got beat? Good. We learned.

Unexpected problems? Good. We have the opportunity to figure out a solution

 

Finally: if you can say the word “good,” then guess what?

It means you’re still alive.
It means you’re still breathing.

And if you’re still breathing, that means you’ve still got some fight left in you.
So get up, dust off,

reload, recalibrate, re-engage—
and go out on the attack

 

So. Let us cry no more. Let us mourn no more.

Let us remember—but let us not dwell …
Instead: Let us laugh and love and let us embrace and venerate everything that life is and every opportunity it gives us.
Let us LIVE—for those WHO live no more.
Let us live to honor them!

Chapter 8 - Focus

 

In combat, focus comes pretty easily because the battle is right in front of your face.
You have no choice but to focus.

But, sometimes, in day-to-day life, you can lose track of the long-term goal. It fades from your vision. It slips from your mind.

WRONG

 

I want that long-term goal to be so embedded in my mind, that I never lose sight of it.

EVER

And the little tasks and projects and short-term goals that you tackle need to lead toward strategic victory—winning the long war.
But we want results

 

 

NOW.

 

 

We want the shortcut to the winner’s podium.
We need the instant gratification.

And when we don’t get the short-term glory

 

sometimes we lose sight of those long-term goals. They fade. We lose focus.
So we stop the daily tasks and the daily disciplines that will allow us to achieve our goals. And a day slips by. And then another day. And a day turns into a week and a week into a year.

And you look up in six weeks or six months or six years …
And you’ve made no progress:

None

 

In fact: The only thing valuable in regret is the lesson you learned.
The knowledge you gained.
But walking around filled with regret gets you nothing.
So. Learn and move on.
Don’t let regret beat you down. Don’t be a slave to regret.

Chapter 9 - Truth

 

Everything is in our head, our head make us ANXIOUS, happy, nervous and Sad. The problem is that this is the way we are wired, we need a new way to get wired. People tell BULLSHIT and once you start giving fuck about this bullshit you are doom as fuck.

 

 

That's the problem... believing in it!

We get brainwashed, manipulated... always face negativity... The problem is that we don't act upon the things we desire... we leave the thoughts aside and we take massive action.

 

 

That's what we need!

 

STOP GIVING FUCK ABOUT IT
STOP FEELING GUILTY FOR THINGS YOU HAVE DONE

 

 

 

(Explanation: I am going to explain it in a very easy way... don't take life so serious... You are supposed to have joy, happiness, laugher not SADNESS and anger and tiredness... DEPRESSION.

Guilty for what?
You can't change it... just accept it)

 

 

 

 

STOP SAYING LATER
STOP THE DENIAL
STOP EXCUSING ACTION
STOP EXCUSES
STOP SELF-DEFEATING THOUGHTS
STOP LIVING IN YOUR HEAD

 

 

 

(Explanation: Probably there is NO one to explain you the dynamics, but I am here... your mom fucked you over with "Rape", "Pedophiles", "Diseases", "Syndromes"... and all dark witch craft.. and she fucked your brain... now it's time to live this wired way aside and install a new system.

No More denial of changing or action, thoughts are SUPPOSED to be driven by motivation not by desperation.
You have been in your head 1000 times... nothing more than a cynical... hell.. crazy circle of mad thoughts spinning around..)

Chapter 10 - "No" and "Not Feeling It"

 NO.

Let it teach you. Let it make you better. Let the fear of regret fuel you—to take action—
today—now

 

 

Take action now to become a person not filled with regret,
but a person filled with knowledge and strength and power
and life.  

 

NOT FEELING IT

How do I handle those days when I’m just not “feeling it”?
Those days when I am tired or worn out or just sick of the grind …
What do I do on those days?

I GO ANYWAY. I GET IT DONE

 

Even if I am just going through the motions—

I GO THROUGH THE MOTIONS.

Don’t really want to work out? I work out.
Don’t really want to hammer on a project? I hammer on the project.
Don’t really want to get up and get out of bed?

I GET UP AND GET OUT OF BED.

Now—these could be signals that you need some time off—and those signals might be right

BUT—don’t take today off. Wait until tomorrow. Don’t give in to the immediate gratification that is whispering in your ear.

SHUT THAT DOWN. DO NOT LISTEN.

Instead: Go through the motions. Lift the weights. Sprint the hill. Work on the project. GET OUT OF BED.
I don’t like procrastination. But if you feel like you need a break—that is one thing you should procrastinate

Chapter 11 - Fear Of Failure

Fear of failure.

Fear of failure can keep you from taking the risk.

It can leave you sitting there, paralyzed into not taking action.

And that is obviously bad

 

But: I don’t want you to overcome fear of failure.
I want you to be afraid of failure.

FEAR OF FAILURE IS GOOD.

Fear of failure will keep you up at night, planning, rehearsing, going over contingencies.
Fear of failure will keep you training hard.
Fear of failure will stop you from cutting corners

Fear of failure will keep you working, thinking, striving, and relentlessly trying to be more prepared for battle.
So I want you to be afraid of failing. I fear failure.
But more important—
I want you to be horrified—terrified—
of sitting on the sidelines and doing nothing.
 
That is what I want you to be afraid of:
Waking up in six days or six weeks or six

years or SIXTY YEARS and being no closer to your goal … You have made NO PROGRESS.
That is the horror. That is the nightmare. That is what you really need to be afraid of: Being stagnant.

So.

     GET UP. AND. GO.

Take the risk, take the gamble, take the first step. Take action.

      And don’t let another day.

Chapter 12 - Fight

 

Go down swinging. And I’ll tell you: If you fight with all you have, more often than not, you won’t go down at all. You will win.
But you have to make that attitude a part of your everyday life.
Do the extra repetition.

Run the extra mile.

Go the extra round

Make the right choices.
Give the full measure.
Make yourself stronger, mentally and physically.
Stand and fight.
Fight against weakness. Against fear. Against time and against decay.

FIGHT BACK.

Go down swinging.
Give every day everything you’ve got.
And when you face a challenge—even

something you don’t believe you can win, or a situation where you know you cannot win—remember this:
      You have nothing to lose.
So.

STAND UP. GO FORWARD.

Go out in a blaze of glory, fighting with everything you’ve got, every ounce of energy, every bead of sweat, every drop of blood—until your last breath.

 

 

Chapter 13 - Until The End

 

Something I saw in combat that I later tried to train out of people was the tendency to relax once the primary objective of a mission was complete.

 

I tried to train that out of them because you can’t relax until the entire mission is complete

 

In training, we always attacked the platoons hard on their primary objective, but we always attacked them even harder after they left the main target, once the platoons were patrolling back to base, when their minds had already gone home and “turned off.”

That’s when we would bring it to them. Hit them from multiple angles with all kinds of mayhem.

So they would develop the attitude and the muscle memory to keep going until the end. And even when they got

back to base, we would re-task them so they had to begin planning again. It wouldn’t stop.
That’s the mentality I wanted to instill in them:
It is never finished.

You always have more to do.
Another mission. Another task. Another goal.

And the enemy is always watching. Waiting. Looking for that moment of weakness.
Looking for you to exhale, set your

weapon down, and close your eyes, even just for a moment.
And that’s when they attack.

So don’t be finished.
Be starting. Be alert. Be ready. Be attacking.

BE RELENTLESS.

Let the enemy stop. Let the enemy rest. Let the enemy finish.
You? Don’t finish. Don’t stop. Don’t rest.
Not until the enemy is completely destroyed.

Chapter 14 - Weakness

 

Do I have weakness?
I am nothing but weakness.
I am not naturally strong, or fast, or flexible.
I am certainly not the smartest person in the world.
I get emotional over stupid things.
I eat the wrong foods.
I don’t sleep enough

 

I procrastinate and I waste time.

I care too much about meaningless things and not enough about important things.

My ego is too big.
My mind is too small, often trapped inside itself.
Now all that being said, I have a saying: A person’s strength is often their biggest weakness.
But, their weaknesses can become strengths.
Me? I am weak, in all those ways, I am weak.

 

BUT

 

I don’t accept that.
I don’t accept that I am what I am and that “that” is what I am doomed to be.
NO. I do not accept that.
I’m fighting.
I’m always fighting. I’m struggling and I’m scraping and kicking and clawing at those weaknesses—to change them. To stop them.
Some days I win. But some days I don’t.
But each and every day: I get back up
and I move forward.

Chapter 15 - OVERCOMING PROCRASTINATION

People want to know how to stop laziness.

They want to know how to stop procrastination

They have an idea in their head …
Maybe even a vision.
But they don’t know where to start—so they ask.
And they say: “Where do I start?”
“When is the best time to start?”
And I have a simple answer:

HERE and NOW.

That’s it.

You want to improve?
You want to get better

You want to get on a workout program or a clean diet or start a new business?
You want to write a book or make a movie or build a house or a computer or an app?
Where do you start? You start right HERE.
When do you start? You start right NOW.
You initiate action.
                           You GO.
Here is the reality

That idea isn’t going to execute itself.
That book isn’t going to write itself.
Those weights out in the gym—they aren’t going to move themselves.

Chapter 16 - Excuses

 YOU HAVE TO DO IT.

 

And you have to do it now. So stop thinking about it. Stop dreaming about it.
Stop researching every aspect of it …

NO MORE
No more.
No more.
NO MORE.

No more excuses.
No more: “I’ll start tomorrow.”

No more: “Just this once.”

No more accepting the shortfalls of my own will

No more taking the easy road.

No more bowing down to whatever unhealthy or unproductive thoughts
float through my mind.

No.
No more.

No more waiting for the perfect moment
and no more indecision
and no more lies.

No more weakness.
No.
No more.

Now is the time for strength

And through strength—

and through will—

and through unwavering discipline—

I will become what I want to be.
I will become who I want to be.
And then—and only then—will I rest and say:
                             No more

Chapter 17 - Vigilant

It wasn’t in a war.

It wasn’t in a battle.
It isn’t in a melee of fire and destruction that most of us succumb to weakness.
We are taken apart, slowly.
Convinced to take an easier path.

Enticed by comfort

 

Most of us aren’t defeated in one decisive battle.
We are defeated one tiny, seemingly insignificant surrender at a time that chips away at who we should really be.
It isn’t that you wake up one day and decide that’s it: I am going to be weak.

No. It is a slow incremental process. It chips away at our will—it chips away at our discipline.
We sleep in a little later.

We miss a workout, then another

We start to eat what we shouldn’t eat and drink what we shouldn’t drink.
And, without realizing it—one day, you wake up and you have become something that you never would have allowed.

Instead of strong—you are weak.
Instead of disciplined—you are disorganized and lost.
Instead of moving forward and progressing—you are moving backward and decaying

 

And those things happen without you seeing them.
Without you recognizing them.

So.

You have to BE VIGILANT. You have to be ON GUARD.
You have to HOLD THE LINE on the seemingly insignificant little things—
things that shouldn’t matter—but that do.

Chapter 18 - Fear

Fear is normal.
Every person feels fear at some point.
What should you do?
Step.
Step.
   Take the step.
Step aggressively toward your fear—that is the step into bravery

We are scared of what we don’t know, and there is but one way to confront that fear:
 
Step. GO.
And that simple action, this simple attitude answers so many questions.
How do you get to the gym every day?
 
          Step. GO.
 
How do you change your diet?
                Step. GO

How do you overcome fear of failure or fear of success or fear of fear itself?
      Step. GO.
How do you face the fear of the unknown?
      Step. GO.
Don’t wait anymore.
   Don’t think anymore.
      Don’t plan anymore.
          Don’t contemplate anymore.
Don’t make any more excuses or justifications

Anything else.
No. No. NO. NO.
Instead: Be aggressive.
          Take action.
         Now.
And the first action you need to take?
      The first step you need to take?
The first step you need to take is just that:
Step.
      Step.
            Go.
                  Now.

Chapter 19 - The Darkness

 The sun doesn’t shine every day.

The storms will come.

There are times when the nights will be long and dark and you will be alone.
There will be times when The Darkness seems to consume everything

But don’t let it consume you.

Don’t let it consume you.
Even in the darkest times.
Even in the strongest storms.

Even when the sun is blotted out and the world is falling apart.
The Darkness cannot extinguish your light.

You.

Your WILL. Your determination

No matter what is happening—no matter how hard the fight is.
As long as you keep fighting—you win.
Only surrender is defeat.
Only quitting is the end.
Because The Darkness only wins if you let it.
 
Do not let The Darkness win.
 
Fight.
 
Fight on.

Chapter 20 - Rules to Live By

 (George Carlin author, comedian)

 

Life is not as difficult as people think; all one needs is a good set of rules. Since it is probably too late for you, here are some guidelines to pass along to your children.

 

1. Relax and take it easy. Don't get caught up in hollow conceits such as "doing something with your life." Such twaddle is outmoded and a sure formula for disappointment.

 

2. Whatever it is you pursue, try to do it just well enough to remain in the middle third of the field. Keep your thoughts and ideas to yourself and don't ask questions. Remember, the squeaky wheel is the first one to be replaced.

 

3. Size people up quickly, and develop rigid attitudes based on your first impression. If you try to delve deeper and get to "know" people, you're asking for trouble.

 

4. Don't fall for that superstitious nonsense about treating people the way you would like to be treated. It is a transparently narcissistic approach, and may be the sign of a weak mind.

 

5. Spend as much time as you can pleading and impressing others, even if it makes you unhappy. Pay special attention to shallow manipulators who can do you the most harm. Remember, in the overall scheme, you count for very little.

 

6. Surround yourself with inferiors and losers. Not only will you look good by comparison, but they will look up to you, and that will make you feel better.

 

7. Don't buy into the sentimental notion that everyone has shortcomings; it's the surest way of undermining yourself. Remember, the really best people have no defects. If you're not perfect, something is wrong.

 

8. If by some off chance you do detect a few faults, first, accept the fact that you are probably deeply flawed. Then make a list of your faults and dwell on them. Carry the list around and try to think of things to add. Blame yourself for everything.

 

9. Beware of intuition and gut instincts, they are completely unreliable. Instead, develop preconceived notions and don't waver unless someone tells you to. Then change your mind and adopt their point of view. But only if they seem to know what they're talking about.

 

10. Never give up on an idea simply because it is bad and doesn't work. Cling to it even when it is hopeless. Anyone can cut and run, but it takes a very special person to stay with something that is stupid and harmful.

 

11. Always remember, today doesn't count. Trying to make something out of today only robs you of precious time that could be spent daydreaming or resting up.

 

12. Try to dwell on the past. Think of all the mistakes you've made, and how much better it would be if you hadn't made them. Think of what you should have done, and blame yourself for not doing so. And don't go easy. Be really hard on yourself.

 

13. If by chance you make a fresh mistake, especially a costly one, try to repeat it a few times so you become familiar with it and can do it easily in the future. Write it down. Put it with your list of faults.

 

14. Beware also of the dangerous trap of looking ahead; it will only get you in trouble. Instead, try to drift along from day to day in a meandering fashion. Don't get sidetracked with some foolish "plan."

 

15. Finally, enjoy yourself all the time, and do whatever you want. Don't be seduced by that mindless chatter going around about "responsibility." That's exactly the sort of thing that can ruin your life.

Chapter 21 - OverHelmed.

Yes. Life can be overwhelming.
That’s the way life works. It is testing you.
It is going to throw problems at you and it is going to throw them at you all at the same time. This is the way life works: Murphy’s Law

 

 

It is easy to feel beaten when you are faced with all those problems at once.
But let me tell you, that does not mean give up fighting.
In fact: It means the opposite.
It is time for you to fight harder.
To dig in.
To go on The Warpath.
To assess what the problems are, and decide which one you are going to attack first. Then, get started!

Part 5

 No More... Not less

Chapter 1.1. - Success and Failure

 

“If human emotions largely result from thinking, then one may appreciably control one’s feelings by controlling one’s thoughts – or by changing the internalized sentences, or self-talk, with which one largely created the feeling in the first place.”

 

That quote comes from Albert Ellis, one of the forefathers of modern psychology. Ellis found that how we think and talk about our experiences shifts the way we feel about them. In short, our thoughts are bedfellows with our emotions.

Ellis also found that the way we think can often be completely irrational.

Consider how many times you’ve told yourself something like, “I’m so stupid,” “I always mess things up,” “My life is over,” or some negative description of an event like, “this is the worst thing that’s ever happened to me”.

 

Raise your hand if you’ve ever completely over-reacted to something that, in hindsight, barely registered on the important-o-meter? Ok, put your hand down, people are watching and you’re starting to look a bit silly. If you look back you’ll see that in the instant before that seemingly random over-reaction, you had a flash of outrageous self-talk, BANG! …and off you go with your good self.

 

Some of the things we say and do aren’t always particularly rational but we seem to say and do them anyway! In addition, we never really see what we are leaving ourselves with or the emotional residue of engaging in even the mildest of negative self-talk.

 

You see, it’s not always dramatic self-talk, sometimes it’s subtle but equally disempowering. If you’re working on something, you might think, “This is so hard. What if I don’t finish in time?” or worry about all the different ways you can “mess up,” which leaves you in an anxious or worried state. Sometimes negative self-talk leads to anger, sadness, or frustration that manifests in different or seemingly unrelated situations...."

Chapter 2.1. - Language is Changing Our Lifes

 "The way we talk doesn’t only affect us in the moment. It can seep into our subconscious and become internalized, changing our thoughts and behavior in the long-term.

 

In real everyday terms, the way we talk to ourselves and others instantly shapes how we perceive life, and that same perception directly impacts our behavior right there in the moment. Ignore your perceptions at your peril! Even worse, live with the illusion that you don’t have perceptions!

 

If you’re sometimes talking about how “unfair” life is, you’ll start to act according to that view, perceiving slights where none exist or, as studies have shown, putting less effort into your work because you’ve already determined it won’t accomplish anything. The unfair view will quickly become your reality.

 

On the other hand, the person who views success as if it were just around the corner will not only work his butt off to achieve it but be energized and alive to it and all the while acting on that fundamental view of success. To be clear, believing you will be successful is only one, (albeit important), part of success. By the same token, there is a way to accomplish great things without that belief although the ride will be a bit rougher!

If you’re worried that you don’t have that kind of personal belief, READ ON!

Marcus Aurelius, the stoic philosopher turned Roman Emperor, said, “Here is a rule to remember in the future, when anything tempts you to feel bitter: not ‘This is misfortune,’ but ‘To bear this worthily is good fortune.’”

It’s entirely within our power to determine how we think about and talk about our problems. They can be a nuisance or a stepping stone. They can hold us down or lift us up.

In fact, stoic philosophers like Aurelius believed that outside events hold no power over us at all. We create our own reality with our minds.

 

“Reject your sense of injury and the injury itself disappears.”

Take some time here to ponder that statement.

 

How willing are you to consider that your life is the way it is, not because of the weight of your circumstances or situation, but rather the weight of self-talk that pulls you down? That what you think you can and cannot do is influenced much more directly by some subconscious response than the reality of life itself?!

If you keep looking out there, (outside of yourself), to your circumstances and feverishly working to get out of them you’ll keep getting the same response. No power, no joy, no vitality. At best it’s a see-saw of success and disappointment, happiness and despair. Sometimes your circumstances just don’t change, sometimes they stagnate and crystalize. What if that thing you’re working toward, that thing you are sure will make you happier, better or more confident doesn’t happen? What then? Even if it does arrive someday, what happens to your life between now and that day?..."

Chapter 3.1 - This Book

 This book main goal is to make people want more from life, do more in life. If you wamy right now... right here you can close and delete this book.

 

The book which now you are reading a book which has thoughts about depression, anxiety, lost motivation... In other words if you have lost the spark of living and asking questions and your mother and father or let's put them as your parents have taught you don't be happy or to say what you feel or to express it or even the simple thing of asking questions and being curious... The have forbidden you... this here book is going to help you remove...

THE IDIOT GUY... inside your head who is ruining your life...

Comedy is great example of how in the frame of 2 hours or less... you feel great and then in other day you feel like shit.

Here in this book I am going to try to show you exercises, tips, advice and even personal thoughts as for how to get in life... To be more happy, open, to talk, express, to be curious...

This here book is going to be your morning manifesto!

Chapter 4 - Thought Loops and Etc

This loops are going to return your life back on track.

But let's first keep in mind this note!

Note: What fucks us over is when we give meaning to things… That's when mood get changed… when life experiences and expectations change.

"AM I going to die?"

"I am the best candidate as far as you know it."

"I deserve best in what the world is preparing."

....

1) Cold Shower
2) Deep Lunges and Wall Sits

Chapter 5 - Re-Training Brain

 "RE-TRAIN YOUR BRAIN - ONE WORD AT A TIME

 

All this talk about our subconscious isn’t just a bunch of psychobabble.

Scientists have discovered that our thoughts can actually change the physical structure of our brain. This phenomenon, neuroplasticity, is revolutionizing the way we think about the human mind.

 

As we go through life learning and experiencing new things, our brain is constantly arranging and rearranging the neural pathways that control how we think and behave. The best part is, we direct our thoughts in a way that consciously modifies these path ways for ourselves. And the easiest way to shape those thoughts is through conscious, decisive self-talk. The kind of talk that “cuts through” and takes control of your life.

 

Just like we build habits by repeating an action until it becomes “automatic”, we can use strong, assertive language over time to create lasting change in our lives. It’s more than just happy thoughts, (don’t break out the candy canes just yet) – you’re affecting your brain’s very biology.

 

We can determine our emotions by steering our thoughts. We can shape those thoughts by being conscious of and diligent about our words and the kind of language we engage in. A lot of this will come down to your basic tolerance of your current mindset and your willingness to change it.

...."

Chapter 5.1. - Blame (I know the story)

"The physiological and psychological impact of using in-the-moment, assertive language is not only powerful, it has a very real in-the-moment effect. There’s a massive difference between, “I am relentless” and, “I will be relentless”. One of those statements intervenes in this moment of your life, the other lives more like a description of what’s to come rather than what’s here. All of this will require you to try out assertive speaking in your daily life and catch yourself when you’re using the more general narrative kind of speaking..."

"Stop blaming luck.

 

Stop blaming other people.

 

Stop pointing to outside influences or circumstances.

Stop blaming your childhood or neighborhood.

 

This approach is fundamental to everything that I talk about in these pages. You cannot, I repeat CANNOT dwell in any blame game in your life. Even blaming yourself is completely useless. Of course you’ll face situations that you seemingly can’t control. You may even face tragic circumstances, like disability, disease, or the death of a loved one.

 

But there is always something you can do to impact those circumstances even if you’ve had them for years and still can’t see a way. But first, you must be willing. To fully embrace my approach, you must first accept that while there are things have happened in your life that you had no say in, you are 100% responsible for what you do with your life in the aftermath of those events. Always, every time, no excuses.

 

The dictionary describes willingness as – “The quality or state of being prepared: Readiness”.

Chapter 5.2. - Willigness

 "In other words, willingness is a state in which we can engage with life and see a situation from a new perspective. It starts with you and ends with you. No one can make you willing, and you cannot move forward until you really are willing to make the next move.

 

When you are finally willing, you can literally experience that willingness, that innate freedom that courses through your veins and similarly when you are not, the kind of primordial stuck-ness that halts, and presses down on you like some invisible weight on your chest.

 

Believe me, I hear you, “I am willing but...”. Every time you add the “but” to the end of that statement, you turn yourself into the victim. In my many years as a coach and mentor, I have heard as many complex life situations as there are, from the darkest of pasts to the weight and gravity of the present or crippling fear of the future, I have heard them over and over and over again. You have to hear what I am saying in the way that it’s intended. I’m not saying these things to inflame you, well, maybe I am but the intention is to inflame you to your own potential, to realize your own greatness, not just to piss you off! Take the case, imagine for a moment, that willingness is missing in your life. Not some wispy, sheepish willingness but rather a bold willingness, the kind of willing state where you are ready for what’s next and ready to act on it. Willingness to change, willingness to let go, willingness to accept. Real, magical, inspired willingness."

 

"...Am I willing to go to the gym?

 

Am I willing to work on that project I’ve been putting off?

Am I willing to face my social fears?

Am I willing to ask for a raise or quit this

shitty job?

 

In short, are you willing to stop living the life you have and start living the life you’re after? It ALL begins with the emergence of willingness, that liquid, constantly expanding and contracting state where life springs and cedes—and all of it is within you at the flick of a linguistic switch.

 

We often view ourselves as procrastinators or lazy or unmotivated. When in reality, we’re simply unwilling. We put things off or avoid them completely because we tell ourselves we just don’t want to do it or that we can’t do it.

Instead of viewing this behavior as a character flaw, let’s create a sense of willingness where there is apparently none. A spark of potential, if you like. You are a master generator of this state of openness and potential. Once upon a time in your life, this state was easy to access, enlivened by the vigor of youth or the curiosity of childhood. Somehow, over the years, we lost touch with this magical state.

The famous philosopher and political scientist Niccolo Machiavelli once said,

“Where the willingness is great, the difficulties cannot be great”.

 

Consider that for a second. It does not matter what you’re facing in life, which obstacle you’re trying to overcome – if you are willing to generate that state of willingness, that’s your doorway to making the effort, taking the steps, dealing with the setbacks, and ultimately creating the progress and change in your life that you’re seeking.

 

That’s why such a simple statement – “I am willing” – is so profound. You become enlivened and empowered by its promise, open to its allure.

I ask again: are you willing?
..."

Chapter 6 - Special

 This Chapter here is special... very special...

JUST STOP AND THINK ABOUT IT

 

 

How much things are you doing?

How much books are you reading?

How much things are suppossed to do?

How far do you get?

 

 

Is your life chaos?

 

Like to read about 20 books... this are the books which want-to-read and then current-reading.... 50 more... and also in the same time searching more and more and more and uploading them online... on your disk... and obsessing... about it...

 

IT could be about films like

 

You like this one and this one and you add the to your watch-list.... in the same time you are watching videos about social intelligence...

About how to date girls how to escalate you have put on your back pleny of theory... when it comes to action you are like

 

 

OKAY... TOMORROW... NOW I WON'T DO IT

I DON'T FEEL ABOUT IT

I AM NOT IN THE MOOD

I NEED MORE DATA

I GONNA TAKE A BREAK... SO TODAY I AM GOING TO TELL YOU SOMETHING

 

 

TODAY IS THE DAY

TODAY IS THE DAY

 

TODAY IS THE FUCKING DAY

 

NO MORE LATER

NO MORE TOMORROW

 

 

OKAY... TOMORROW... NOW I WON'T DO IT

I DON'T FEEL ABOUT IT

I AM NOT IN THE MOOD

I NEED MORE DATA

I GONNA TAKE A BREAK... SO TODAY I AM GOING TO TELL YOU SOMETHING

 

 

TODAY IS THE DAY

TODAY IS THE DAY

 

TODAY IS THE FUCKING DAY

 

NO MORE LATER

NO MORE TOMORROW

 

 

OKAY... TOMORROW... NOW I WON'T DO IT

I DON'T FEEL ABOUT IT

I AM NOT IN THE MOOD

I NEED MORE DATA

I GONNA TAKE A BREAK... SO TODAY I AM GOING TO TELL YOU SOMETHING

 

 

TODAY IS THE DAY

TODAY IS THE DAY

 

TODAY IS THE FUCKING DAY

 

NO MORE LATER

NO MORE TOMORROW

 

 

 

 

 

 

OKAY... TOMORROW... NOW I WON'T DO IT

I DON'T FEEL ABOUT IT

I AM NOT IN THE MOOD

I NEED MORE DATA

I GONNA TAKE A BREAK... SO TODAY I AM GOING TO TELL YOU SOMETHING

 

 

TODAY IS THE DAY

TODAY IS THE DAY

 

TODAY IS THE FUCKING DAY

 

NO MORE LATER

NO MORE TOMORROW

 

 

 

 

 

OKAY... TOMORROW... NOW I WON'T DO IT

I DON'T FEEL ABOUT IT

I AM NOT IN THE MOOD

I NEED MORE DATA

I GONNA TAKE A BREAK... SO TODAY I AM GOING TO TELL YOU SOMETHING

 

 

TODAY IS THE DAY

TODAY IS THE DAY

 

TODAY IS THE FUCKING DAY

 

NO MORE LATER

NO MORE TOMORROW

 

 

 

 

 

BUt probably I am wrong you are obsessing about how to talk to people and you are ignoring all other stuff... you want to succeed in one place... but you are going in whole new direction...

 

 

Like you want to be a Psychologist... but you are reading medicine books.... this by itself is contradiction

 

 

 

SO LET'S GET IT CLEAR

TODAY IS THE DAY

TO FINISH THAT MOVIE

TO START FINISHING THIS BOOKS

TO START GOING TO DO THE THINGS WHICH YOU ARE SUPOSSED TO DO)

 

 

 

 

 

 

Chapter 7 - Attack

And listen: It won’t be easy.
In fact: It will be hard.
Life is hard.

   That’s what life is.

And these challenges you face, they are going to do their best to

Take
you
   down.

DO NOT LET THEM.
Stand up. Dig in

 

Line up those problems and confront them—face them—fight them.

DO NOT LET THEM BRING YOU DOWN.

Instead, let these challenges raise you up—let them elevate you.
Let their demands and their trials make you stronger—let the adversity you face today turn you into a better person tomorrow

So in the future, you look back at these struggles and you say to them:
Thank you—
you made me better

Ignore and outperform.
Yes. While you are over there watching me and talking about me—I’m working.
I’m working hard. I’m taking things to the next level.
You keep gossiping—I’ll keep working.
You keep talking smack—I’ll keep working.
You keep chattering about things—I’ll keep working

You keep focusing on what everyone else is doing

wrong—I’ll keep focusing on what I can do RIGHT.

Chapter 7.1. - Begin

This is where it begins.

In the darkness.
Before the sun and the birds and the world.
Every day.
When the alarm sounds.

IT IS TIME.

Rise

Despite fatigue and soreness.
 
Curse the warmth of the bed.
Curse the comfort of the pillow.
Fight the temptation of weakness.
Get up and go.
Do it quickly, without thought.
Do not reason with weakness. You cannot.
You must only take action.
 
Get up
 
     and GO

 

ENGAGE

Engage.

Weakness is strong.
I must be stronger.
I must crush it into submission

Chapter 7.2. - ASSERTIVE VS NARRATIVE

 "How the heck does one create their own reality? By shifting your self-talk from being a streaming narrative (where you talk about yourself, others and life, a dialog of opinion and judgement), to being assertive, where you cast all of the default “noise” aside and assert your power right here and now.

One of the first mistakes we make is when we talk about what we are going to do or who we will be. Don’t even get me started on “should, or “try”! Sub-consciously we are already determining when that will be happening and it’s certainly not in this moment of time.

One of the reasons why we so often abandon New Year’s resolutions is because they usually use language to describe what we are “going” to do, i.e. later. All too often they begin with what we’re not going to do all of which leaves us enthusiastic at the beginning but out of juice when faced with the inevitable moment when reality takes a swing at your face. You’ll be standing there alone in the giant hole in your life left open by that behavior you are apparently “stopping”. Those are the moments in life where your internal dialog runs riot! What if you’ve promised yourself to lose weight and are craving pizza or if you promised to save some money but that jacket you just can’t live without is suddenly on sale? How does one deal with those moments when the enthusiasm wanes and those old thought patterns re-emerge? What are you going to do instead?

Assertive self-talk is when you stake a claim for this moment of time, right here and now. When you start to talk in terms of “I am…” or “I embrace…” or “I accept…” or “I assert…”, all of which are powerful and commanding uses of language rather than the narrative of “I will…” or “I’m going to…”"

Chapter 7.3. - The Way

"Have you ever felt like a hamster on a wheel, furiously churning your way through life but somehow going nowhere?

All the while you’re caught in a loop of constant internal chatter and judgement that never stops, a little voice telling you that you’re lazy or stupid or not good enough. You won’t even notice the degree to which you believe it or are drained by it, you’ll just be spending your day working to overcome the stresses and strains, trying to live your life and at various points facing the resignation that if you can’t get your ass off this damned wheel maybe you are never going to get to where you want in life – maybe that happiness you’re after or that weight you want to lose or that career or relationship you crave will remain just out of reach.

These pages are dedicated to those that experience that self-defeating monolog. The endless stream of doubt and subterfuge that limits and taints everyday life. This is a conversational slap from the universe to wake you up to your true potential, to unfuck yourself and get spectacularly into your life.

Let’s get this thing started in the right place. There are two kinds of talk you engage in every day: talking to others and talking to yourself. You might be one of those that insists, “I don’t talk to myself!” But, in fact, most of the conversations you have on any given day are with yourself—all “enjoyed” in the solitude and privacy of your own head.

Whether you’re introverted or extroverted, creative or practical, you spend huge swathes of your time talking to…YOU! You do it while exercising, working, eating, reading, writing, walking, texting, crying, arguing, negotiating, planning, praying, meditating, having sex, (on your own and with others)—you name it. And yes, you even do it in your sleep.

You’re actually doing it right now..."

Chapter 7.4. - Goals

"Some goals simply aren’t connected to our reality. Don’t get me wrong, I am all for reaching for the stars and striving for things that seem impossible. For instance, we’d probably all like to be filthy rich. But are you willing to do what it takes to make that much money? Are you willing to work 60, 70 or 80 hours of your week or skip vacations to do the work that needs to get done? Are you willing to take on more responsibility and, importantly, risk it all? Have you, in reality, confronted and dealt with what becoming filthy rich might really demand of you? The seemingly endless drain on your life and mind space? Our society has produced such a headlong rush to be the wealthiest, the smartest, the prettiest, the best dressed, the funniest or the strongest, and somewhere in there we have lost the ability to just be ourselves, free to breathe life and choose our own path rather than carry the burden of social or familial expectation. What does all that produce? Well, a lot of disappointed and unfulfilled human beings that’s for sure.

 

That doesn’t mean you should stop pursuing amazing life goals if that’s what you really want. It also doesn’t mean you should let yourself stagnate and stop improving either. There’s nothing inherently wrong in working long hours and sacrificing your quality of life, and some people might be perfectly content doing so in order to make the income or get the career they want. But so many of us have actually forgotten why we are pursuing what we are pursuing in the first place.

 

All too often, we focus solely on what we don’t have, even though deep down we don’t really need it or perhaps even want it. When I lay these things out, you might be nodding your head. “He’s right, I don’t need to be a millionaire” or “I don’t even really want six-pack abs.”

Which of course is all fine until the next time you see that nice car and think, “Why don’t I have that?”, or when you look at the cover of a magazine and wonder, “Why don’t I look like that?” or “Why aren’t my clothes that nice?” Making sure we’re striving for what we really want requires a constant check-in with ourselves. It’s not a one-and-done deal."

Chapter 8 - Today

"If you really want those things, then go get them! Begin today, lay out your strategy, deal with your reality and, most importantly, take the actions required and take them often!

 

But if you’re not willing to work an extra 10 or 20 hours a week just to drive to work in a BMW instead of a Honda, give up the complete waste of precious headspace to yearn for it. Stop pretending to yourself. Deal with your unwillingness to take on the kind of actions accomplishing those things would require and accept that you have been bullshitting yourself. You’ll have a lot more capacity for loving the life you actually do have and create some room to begin striving for the things you actually want in life.

 

“I am unwilling” to give up all of my favorite foods just to have the body I did when I was 20. “I am unwilling” to trade time with my family for an extra zero on my paycheck.

Face your reality. Once you adopt the mindset of “I am unwilling”, you will no longer be filled with guilt, resentment or regret every time you see something you think you “want”. You’ll be in a place where you are connected to and in tune with your real life and, if you really want to pursue those things in the future, you’ll be able to locate yourself from that reality and plot your road to accomplish them."

 

 

 

Chapter 9 - Thoughts (So Far)

 "So train. Don’t think about it. Don’t take time to “get in shape” before you start. Just go start. The rest will come.."

"Yes. Avoid the danger. Stay away from high-threat areas.

But we can’t always avoid high-threat areas—and sometimes the high-threat area doesn’t avoid us. In the world today, conflict and danger can occur anytime and anywhere. So it is important to maintain situational awareness at all times. Pay attention to your surroundings. Look at suspicious people. Look at unsuspicious people."

 

"That’s why you can’t stop eating it.
And when you do stop eating it, you will feel withdrawal.

Headache.
Irritation.
   Anxiety.
      Lies.

The lies will come, and they will come from you.
The lies you will tell yourself are:
It’s no big deal.
You can just have a little.
It isn’t worth it to feel this bad.
     The body needs carbs"

 

Chapter 10 - Dealing With Injuries and Illness

 "You are going to get injured.

You are going to get sick.
Regardless of how careful you are in your training, how

clean you eat, and how healthy you live, you are still human.
Injuries and illness will occur.
My theory for overcoming injuries and illnesses is simple:

DO WHAT YOU CAN.

If you are sick or injured, don’t use that as an excuse to skip workouts or stay in bed all day.
Do what you can

Hurt your knee? Work your upper body. Work the good leg. Hurt your shoulder? Time to work on one-armed pull-ups and push-ups. Focus on your core and legs until your shoulder heals up.
Tendinitis from using the grip too much? Sounds like it is time to focus on sprinting and jumping plyometrics.
Got a little cold? Flu? Same thing: DO WHAT YOU CAN. Maybe it is just going for a walk. A couple sets of

sit-ups and push-ups. But don’t just stay in bed all day.
Now, sometimes, you get plain knocked out by illness or a virus. If it is that bad and your body absolutely needs rest, good, listen to your body and TAKE THE REST. Also, don’t bring your disease to the gym to spread around. Work out at home.
Same thing with injuries. Some injuries prevent you from doing the physical things you

like to do. Good. Do what you can, work on some skills that you can do. Pick up a guitar. Write a book. Draw. Paint. Compose a song. Blog. Create. Learn. Do something.
Take advantage of physical injuries and sickness by doing something you don’t normally have time for. In other words: GET AFTER IT"

Chapter 11 - Road Of Warriors

 "Many jobs require travel. Travel can make working out difficult.

 

BUT IT DOESN’T MAKE IT IMPOSSIBLE

 

I often just do a hotel room workout on the floor.
The hotel room workouts are rudimentary and, again, are usually not geared toward any great advancement in my physical conditioning. They are more focused on maintaining the discipline of working out early, and getting the benefits that come from working out: blood flow to the brain, releasing endorphins, and

overall kick-starting my day. Also, I do try to plan my schedule to do several days’ worth of murderous physical training before I go on the road so that my body is in need of a rest, and I can use some simple workouts for recovery.
That being said, I have some quick workouts to keep me on track when I am on the road.
For a pull workout, I will try to find some kind of pull-up bar. Usually I can find one

For a push workout in the hotel room I will do push-ups—lots of them. Reps of 80, 70, 60, 50, 40, 30, 20, 10. Another variation is reps of 10, 10, 10, 10, 10, 100, 50, 50, 33, 33, 33, 25, 25, 25, 25, 20, 20, 20, 20, 20, 10, 10, 10, 10, 10. On top of that I will do some burpees—100 for time. And of course some gut

If I need a real workout, I will simply increase the volume of any of these hotel workouts. Any one of these workouts can become vicious when volume and intensity are turned up. I have destroyed myself many times in hotel rooms all over the world. It just takes some creativity and, of course, WILL

So. When you are on the road. Don’t get lazy. Don’t get complacent. Don’t use the road as an excuse.
Get creative. Get aggressive. Get it done.
When you are on the road,
 
      STAY ON THE PATH"

Chapter 12.1. - Do

 "Do

Don’t just read this book.
Don’t just listen to the podcast.
Don’t just watch videos online.
 
Don’t just take notes.
Don’t just study them.
Don’t just share them with your friends.
 
Don’t just plan

Don’t just mark your calendar.
Don’t just “get motivated.”
 
Don’t just talk.
Don’t just think.
Don’t just dream.
No. None of that matters.
The only thing that matters is that you actually do.
SO:
DO"

Chapter 12.2. - Everyday

"This isn’t a part-time gig.

This isn’t punch the clock and go home for the day.

You don’t get weekends off.
No.
Here: There’s no such thing as a weekend

This is an everyday gig: Every day is a Monday.

And you might not like that.
Me? I love it.
To me, every day is a beginning.
A new day.
A new week.
A new shot at life.
An opportunity to come out of the gate like a man possessed and attack the day:
Without mercy"

Chapter 12.3. - Staying Motivated

 "Don’t worry about motivation.
Motivation is fickle. It comes and goes.
It is unreliable and when you are counting on motivation to get your goals accomplished—you will likely fall short.
So
Don’t expect to be motivated every day to get out there and make things happen. You won’t be.
Don’t count on motivation.

Count on Discipline.

 

 

You know what you have to do.
So:

MAKE YOURSELF DO IT.

You do that with Discipline"

Chapter 13 - Anxiety

Let's talk about anxiety.

It's a real bitch

- It makes you guilty
- It ruins your day
- Within it ... procrastination can be found
- Depression
- Laziness

 

Anxiety ruins people... I talk about the whole thing in my books "How to talk to Anyone (#Junior Talker)... in this series... I look every aspect about talking depression... lack of friends... (dating)... pick up... seducing... attraction... anxiety, approach anxiety, labels... frames PLENY of missed topics.

Such book is difficult to be found... I have been reading for a very long time such types of books and here in this motivational book you gonna find everything which can put yoy in high maintenance aka Higher Status.

What you need to do...

Is apply

- AcTION
- Action
- Action
- AcTION
- Action
- Action
- AcTION
- Action
- Action
- Try
- Try Again
- Give a Try
- Try
- Try Again
- Give a Try
- Try
- Try Again
- Give a Try

 

Note: The irony of life is sometimes we don't get correctly the message...

When girl says "No" it doesn't mean... she is not interested... it means that you need to try little more hard. When a girl rejects you it's not the end of world.

 

We should have basic expectations like
Not all people are going to like you
Not all people are going to be your friends
Not all people are going into relation ship with you

Just expect shit like this... but still don't go into the cycle of shit.

Chapter 14 - Motivation (J.C.)

I'm a hugely successful dominant leading

challenging passionate playful

free-flowing self loving teasing

inspiring badass it wasn't really a

choice that I ever had but something

that was bestowed upon me the day I was

born

waves of common waves are gone like any

human being I've forgotten this at times

but right now right here as I stand

strong erect powerful it is as clear to

me as the open blue sky I have been

destined for great things since the day

I was born and now it's my time to keep

building it towards my kingdom in the

sky I take huge action every day because

the world will know my voice and the

voice of my brothers in my teaming I

constantly bet on and invest in myself

and my personal growth because when the

world knows my voice they will instantly

recognize how much value they will be

moved to last so long to grow to share

Cheers

passion to action the men will gain

inspiration from it the women will hear

it and want to talk like it maybe I'll

consider

[Music]

Oh follow me we'll follow up my actions

loaded words and move them follow them

so they'll encourage independence in

their friend their family their women I

refused to cooperate with the media he's

my enemy and while there isn't much I

hold hate for in this world i sieve when

I think of the Prince of mediocrity

I refuse to let procrastination steal

any more time for me she has taken

enough because of my mission in life my

time is extremely valuable it is my most

limited asset and he will never stop

taking from those who let him fuck him

you can go take from someone else I

commit even deeper right now to myself I

commit to bringing my vision to reality

to raising my personal value every day

to loving who I'm becoming while loving

even more Who I am right now I commit

even deeper to raising my personal value

every day to getting just a bit better

every single day to immersing myself

fully in the Kaizen lifestyle I commit

even deeper right now to challenging all

those around me who deserve it

tactically playfully with charming

charisma because I not only see them but

I see who they can become soon and I

know what a few words of challenging

encouragement from the highest bad as

bad as can do for one's spirit I do not

forget the words of Emerson when he said

the creation of a thousand forests is in

a single acorn I commit right now

surrounding myself with only the best

with great people who give value to the

world constantly with success models

that feed my spirit inspiration and

positivity it deserves and I

unapologetically

man on all those who do not fucking

lions and sheep who never met to get

along anyways I commit to all this

because the world will speak my name

because long after I'm gone my legacy

will move mountains because my father's

my father's father's my ancestors my

family my grandparents my blood my life

my team because their greatness lies

waiting inside them right now and it is

not meant to it does not deserve to it

deserves to be out here free like you

like me that is why I commit to myself

my path my purpose my vision my world

right now I act now I move now my

standards for myself are higher now I

want more I require more I must I will

have more to give more I will always

remember they put a man on the moon it

may have taken two billion dollars ten

thousand years and four hundred phd's

but they unearth their challenge and put

a man on the moon since they had the

courage conviction and closers mentality

to do that within me right now I have

blowing in my courage conviction and

closer's mentality required to do this

right now

plus you know sort of fucking awesome I

will always read with value because I

know what it does for the other person

and I know it will always eventually

come back to me at an amount ten times

greater I will always give the gift of

being playfully challenging to the world

because I know what the electrifying

cancel izing emotion of Attraction can

do for a girl how it can make her feel

alive turned on excited feminine I claim

my high status right now I claim all my

personal power right now I claim my

right to beat me to be free right now I

claim my vision right now I thank your

world

this time my time

Oh

Chapter 15 - When

 "WHEN?

The biggest excuse not to work out is lack of time.
Something always comes up.
But there is one time of day that no can take away from you: predawn.
The military has a term: “Stand To.” It

means get up early and be ready for enemy attack. It has been a standard practice for many wars. For instance, in World War One, each man was expected to be awake well before first light, standing on the trench fire step, rifle loaded, bayonet fixed, and ready to repel an attack…"

Note: What humans really need is a strong mindset… we live in world which is constantly trying to ruin us… fuck us over… trying to mentally screw us up.

Chapter 15.1. - Ask Yourself

"...What’s the worst thing that can happen if you offer your idea in that meeting? It gets shot down? So what? Even if you’re faced with bigger tasks—MUCH bigger tasks like years of back taxes, a hoarder’s paradise of a garage, telling the truth to someone you’ve been lying to—the path to change starts with that same glimmer of willingness.

Bear in mind we all tend to build things up in our minds to be a lot bigger than they really are. Telling the truth becomes a trek to the Sahara Desert and back. If that’s the case for you, try breaking the task down into smaller declarations of willingness to “stand up”, “get out of bed”, “open my email”, etc.

Of course you might well be dealing with something much bigger than these examples but even when you ramp it up, the same model works exceptionally well. Let’s say you have been holding onto a dark secret. Maybe you’re ashamed or guilty or resentful. Perhaps this is something that could change your life in a significant way. “Am I willing to tell the truth to that person I’ve been lying to?” When you frame it this way, coming clean becomes an occasion to talk, listen and then deal with the consequences. You might be dreading it but you can do it. It’s not the task that’s important, it’s the life that’s available after that’s at stake here. When you are free to be open and available, with nothing held back, no lies, no withholds or half-truths, you really are your most expressive, most alive self.

Most of the time, the task we’re actually facing is a lot simpler than we think it is. The problem is, we usually don’t take the time to really look at it. Some of the things we face certainly can be challenging, but at the same time what’s on the other side of those challenges is a life of our dreams. A life where we are willing and open and inspired to take it on.

Make that assertion, “I am willing.”..."

 

Note:  It starts with question "Why"... and then you go deeper as fuck as you can... move on... move on... move on... try again and again... take a break... break the cycle... think about what has happen and then come back... come fucking back....

Chapter 15.2. - Are You Willing

 "...PLANT YOUR FLAG

When you start to view the world through the lens of what you’re willing and unwilling to pursue, rather than what it seems you want and don’t want, things start to become a lot clearer.

Instead of wasting time worrying about the things other people have, you’ll start focusing on what’s really important to you and your life. You’ll realize that once you replace envy, lust, and desire with a willingness to change your life for the better, things really start to take shape.

When we understand what we are genuinely willing to do, we take back control over the subconscious thoughts and feelings that previously directed our behavior away from where we truly wanted to go. You have the ability to determine what your truth is and not from some sub-conscious glitch that keeps popping up from the past either but instead from your cognitive and conscious self, from the power of intervening on behalf of yourself. Willingness is a truth, a true beauty that only you can generate. No longer will thoughts like “I am a failure because I’m not a millionaire” or “I am lazy because I’m not a size 6,” have the power to make you feel like crap because you will have owned your choices. Once you frame the obstacles in your life as a matter of “willing” and “unwilling” – instead of weighing yourself down with negative opinions of yourself and your circumstances, you can break through the self-imposed barriers that are truly holding you back. You can see through the distractions of self-talk and drama.

You’ll realize that when you’re willing to do what it takes, nothing else matters. You won’t put off the things you’re truly willing to do. You won’t neglect the responsibilities you took on because you will feel the strong sense of willingness to do them.

Willingness. It’s the lifeblood of the new, the infinite well of possibility and potential, a state where new futures arise and a whole new you can begin.

Ask yourself “am I willing?” over and over until you can hear it, first thing in the morning, last thing at night, while you’re driving, while in the shower, “Am I willing?” Ask, ask, ask until a resounding YES echoes through your consciousness. I AM WILLING!

I ask you again, “Are you willing?”..."

Chapter 15.3. - Re-Wire

"...What if I told you that even when you think you’re losing in life, you’re actually winning? That everything that happens is really a victory?

It’s true. And that’s not just some feel-good self-help mumbo jumbo or a sales line that I’m feeding you.

You are a champion. You’ve knocked out goal after goal, cruising to an undefeated record. Everything you set your mind to comes true.

You’re probably starting to think I’ve lost my mind or maybe even that you’ve lost yours! Perhaps you’re convinced I’m talking to someone else – anyone but you. Let me explain before we both end up like a couple of basket cases.

Imagine this scenario: For what seems like all of your life you’ve been searching for love, that one special person to share your life with. But up to this point, it hasn’t happened. (Remember, this is an example, you can use any area of your own life where you have experienced being stuck in a cycle.) You’ve met people, had relationships, but all of them ended somewhere short of “forever.” You and “the one” just never materialized. The fairytale inevitably came to an end, often a very familiar kind of end.

After a while, you start losing hope. You start to wonder whether you will ever meet the person of your dreams. Maybe you and relationships just aren’t meant to be?

“Will anyone ever love me?”

“Am I worthy of being loved?”

“Why do I always seem to attract the same types of people?”
..."

Chapter 16 - Subconscious

"...As we’ve discussed, subconscious thoughts are deeply ingrained in your psyche, so it can take a lot of thinking, imagination, and commitment to transform these invisible yet powerful thoughts into ones that better align with your stated goals. As with every page here, make the time to take your time.

If you look at the problem areas you came up with before, you might be able to connect to an emotionally charged event somewhere in your life that helped set them in your mind, perhaps in the form of infidelity in a relationship, childhood bullying, parents that never quite lived up to your wants and needs, public embarrassment, or major career failures.

But the more you think about your future and what you really want to accomplish, the deeper those thought processes will work their ways into our mind and take hold. Remember, when you explore and discover what it is you’ve really been winning at, it’s not about fighting against or resisting those thoughts and actions but rather changing direction and setting yourself new goals and outcomes. This must be the kind of work that raises your awareness and throws up red flags for when you are getting off course. The better you understand your patterns the better shot you have in altering them.

When you have set out the goals that you are claiming as yours in life and, more importantly, relentlessly taking the actions to produce, it’s only a matter of when..."

Note: People always care for right or wrong… always live in their limits.. so fuck in the end it fucks them over.

Chapter 16.1. - Toxicity

"It’s like our whole life is tainted, as our smaller problems leak into the bigger picture. Like a coffee spill on your desk, small problems quickly spread and create bigger ones as the brown liquid relentlessly heads for your laptop, phone and stack of bills while you hopelessly pad at the random chaos with your napkin in some forlorn attempt at denying the disaster, it even creates a bigger mess.

That little mess can influence all areas of your life until your emotions surrounding that one area become the lens through which you see everything.

You end up thinking...

“Life is too hard”

“I’ll never make it through this”

“Everyone’s a jerk”

“I’m done with this s***”

None of these sentiments reflect reality, (no matter what you might currently think), but rather your perception of your reality. Unfortunately, knowing this makes no difference whatsoever when you’re stuck right bang in the middle of it all. And, of course, all of this only makes things somehow even worse. A negative experience of myself and/or my life doesn’t help me overcome what I’m dealing with, let alone enjoy my life.

To deal with this, we need to shift how we view our problems and the world and adopt a new, powerfully optimistic and grounded approach.

That’s why my next personal assertion is, “I got this”. "

Chapter 16.2. - Scenes

"If you’re reading this, chances are your life isn’t as hard as a child in Somalia or an Untouchable in India. Chances are your problems are pretty small in comparison to the ones people had when Socrates was born in 470 BC, before modern medicine or electricity or cars or laws to protect public safety existed.

You don’t even have to travel across the globe or back in time for a comparison either. Travel to the other side of your town or look around your office or neighborhood, and you’re almost guaranteed to find plenty of people with worse problems than yours. You might not see it but it’s the same for all of us. We only see the highlight reels of others’ lives while being continually reminded of our own behind the scenes.

If you’re rolling your eyes and wondering “how does any of that help me solve my problems?” I’ll tell you: it doesn’t. None of this will change the tire on your car for you or deposit another thousand dollars into your bank account.

Now, just for a moment of your significant existence, stop picking fluff out of your belly button and look around you. Get connected to your reality, your real life instead of your emotionally soaked self-talk narrative about your life."

Chapter 16.3. - Events

 "...Depending on where you are today, you’ve got dozens or hundreds of great experiences to look back on. Graduations, promotions, awards, parties, and relationships. Even the little things like childhood memories that cradle and comfort you, or those memorable tastes, sights and sounds that embrace you in their familiarity and inspire feelings of warmth and joy. Open up and allow yourself the good grace of those times.

But don’t just limit it to the sugary goodness either. Think about the bad, too.

Recall all the times where you struggled, suffered setbacks, or got knocked down. The arguments, the breakups, the speeding tickets, or the late bills.

Do you remember that time when your parents caught you sneaking out and grounded you? If you experienced a tough childhood, let all of that in here. How about the time you forgot to pay your electricity bill and you had to spend the night reading by candlelight?

Or when you got surgery and had to spend days lying in a hospital bed? Or when you broke up with someone and felt depressed for weeks? Let all of it in, from the most tragic and traumatic to the merely irritating, annoying or regretful.

Remember all the problems you faced – and eventually overcame. A lot of them may be very similar to what you’re dealing with today.

You probably felt a lot of the same emotions back then, too. You thought you’d never get over your ex, that you’d never find a better job, or that you wouldn’t live through the humiliation of some situation.

But you did. You raised up and kicked on and, looking back, some of those problems might even seem a little silly now.

Can you believe how upset you were when you got a D on your math test in high school? Or how bad you felt when you never got a second date with that girl or guy you liked?

Even the more serious problems probably seem a lot different today. After all, you did make it through them, and they ultimately helped shape and form who you are today.
.."

Chapter 16.4 - Thoughts

"But you’ll get through it all, the good and the bad, just like you did in the past. You’ll stand there like the champion you are because they’re all just yet another passing scene in the movie that is your life’s story. "

 

Note: It's well said and well parafrazed

"Face your problems as they come, one by one, give them the attention they need and move on. Bundling them all together into a morass of confusion and letting them overwhelm you just won’t help. It takes precision, patience and discipline of thought. Work through each item pragmatically and with a solution in mind. Remember, everything is solve-able, and if you can’t see a solution, it only means you haven’t worked it out yet.

Often the reason you can’t see the solution is because you’re too close to the problem. Zoom out a little, zoom out a LOT and look at the big picture. This is a similar phenomenon to what psychologists call “cognitive restructuring”—Shifting the way in which your problems are presenting themselves in your life.

Our minds naturally play tricks on us, twisting and distorting our thoughts in ways that are not always rational. Even though we’d like to think we’re always"

Chapter 17 - The Game Is Not Over

 "...You can handle this. It’s not going to kill you. Your life isn’t over. You’ve got plenty more left in the tank. Plenty.

“I got this” doesn’t mean you have the perfect solution. It just means you have your hands on the wheel, you have a say in this just like you’ve had a say all along. I mean come on, you live for this shit!

It’s not always pretty. It’s not always fun but you’ve got this. We’re not just saying this to paper over the cracks or to make yourself feel a little better for a split second. Look at your track record; you’ve really got this! You’ll make it work, just like you always have. You had it then and you got it now.

Get in touch with who you really are and say it.

I got this. I got this. I got this..."

Chapter 18 - Sabotage

"Something inside is sabotaging our natural drive toward freedom. It whines and roars for us to stop whenever we push beyond our comforts; whenever we choose to be authentic and loving in a scary world; whenever we seek to make a difference at the cost of our own position; whenever we desire something magnificent that, to obtain, would require hardship and work. Our internal demons poison us with worry and fear whenever we might be vulnerable, stunting our growth and vitality. Our destiny is decided by how well we know our demons of Doubt and Delay, how well we defend against them, and how many battles we win against them each day of our lives. Without self-mastery, we are slaves to fear."

"We are exhausted. All around us we see faces that look weathered, drooped, stern. We hear conversations that sound increasingly quiet and resigned, like whispers from a tired, disbanding tribe. The emotional energy of the world is flatlining. Well-being has been cast aside for wealth; success favored over sanity. In the process, some have turned cold toward life, and toward others. Where is the energized, heightened, exhilarated pulse one would expect from such a chosen and capable people? Why do we not hear more laughter and life? Where is the vibrant, mad fury and passion of the fully engaged human? Where are the people burning with charisma and joy and magnetism? Where is the appreciation for life’s spark?"

 

"Most of these problems in our lives have been self-imposed. Yet even when we became conscious of them, we sought change in the most humble terms: we set realistic goals and worked to achieve them. But fearful of unleashing our full power, we saw our will fade, we aimed low, and even our mighty efforts were dampened by distraction or the criticisms of a conformist culture. We complained with angst and anger that it should be easier, forgetting that much of the negative energy that pervades our lives comes from despising the inevitable hardships of change Choosing our own aims and seeking to bring themto fruition creates a sense of vitality and motivation in life.The only things that derail our efforts are fear and oppression.
That is ultimately what Personal Freedom is: liberty from the restrictions of social oppression and the tragic self-oppression that is fear. Freed from these things, we have the ability to express who we truly are and pursue what we deeply desire without restrictions set by others or ourselves."

Chapter 19 - Freedom

"Personal Freedom—our goal—means:

 

living freely by crafting a life on our own terms;
being free in the moment from oppressions, of past hurts and present anxieties;
being lighthearted and spontaneous as free spirits;
courageously speaking our thoughts, feelings, and ambitions with those around us, without concern about acceptance;
enjoying our free will to pursue abundant happiness, wealth, health, achievement, and contribution;
freely loving whom we choose with passionate abandon;
standing freely on our own, professing and protecting our ideas and integrity"

 

 

Chapter 19.1. - Interrupted

 "A CAUSE INTERRUPTED

It is only in active self-expression and pursuit of our own aims that we can become free.
Thinking, feeling, speaking, and behaving in ways that are truly our own.

Seeking Personal Freedom begins when we are young and starting to form our own beliefs and directing our behaviors independent from the command of our caregivers. It is the child who takes her first steps away from her mother, who crosses the street safely by herself, who chooses with zeal what she wants to eat, wear, draw, or dress like. Hers is the story of our natural inclination to be independent, a desire to become our own persons. As we age, the impulse becomes more distinct, powerful, and intellectual—we consciously decide that we want to stand on our own, find our own way, chase our own dreams, break down our own boundaries, love without permission and contribute without restriction."

Note: People shouldn't give up... communication is the thing which has broad all people here... where they are now... It's time for action... for action... some people get with looks... others... just need to do the hardwork. Not everyone here is lucky...

 

Chapter 19.2. - Risk

"With this uncertainty there is also risk of vulnerability and loneliness. We are vulnerable because we are beyond the safe bars of the cage that, while limiting, make us feel secure. Those still trapped in the cage no longer see the freed as one of them. To refuse other’s expectations may bring about our greatest fears—that we will be left isolated or abandoned, deemed inferior, thought unworthy of love.
But to stay confined by other people’s rules brings about other risks. Chasing the prizes that society tells us we must want can also drive us from our true self. How many artists turned from their art because they were told they had to make money in a traditional way? How many talented people shirk their strengths to fit into a more needed but less fulfilling role? How many have given up their dreams in order to follow a more secure and profitable and socially accepted path? The aims of others (our parents, our teachers, our spouses, our fans) can become our aims if we are not vigilant. Their certitude can replace our quest for something new. Their collective meaning can subjugate our search for our individual meaning. Yes, let us be wary. We can quickly lose ourselves in others and in our culture. We become not free and genuine humans but rather slaves to opinion.
This is the ultimate misery: living a life that is not our own.
A difficult choice must therefore be made between the comforts of fitting in and pleasing others and our higher motive for Personal Freedom."

Chapter 19.3. - Opression

"SELF - OPPRESSIONS
Unfortunately, most oppression comes not from others but from a source we least suspect: ourselves.
Self-oppression is the condition of letting our own negative thoughts and actions restrict us. It is an inside job, a burdening of our spirit by incessant doubt, worry, fear, and distraction.
None of us wants to be the cause of our own failure in life—yet most often we are. It is our own inept thinking, our own bad habits that rip the vibrancy from life. We are the ultimate oppressors of our own happiness.
Self-oppression is evident whenever we limit ourselves. We stay home instead of going out because we are too anxious to explore. We procrastinate on an important assignment or exciting new venture because we cannot overcome our uncertainty. We fool ourselves into thinking that things must be perfect before we release our art into the world when the clear reality is we’re just too undisciplined to get things done. We lie to ourselves, break our own resolutions, allow our dreams to slide away without grasping at them. Is it not clear to us that we can be our own worst enemy? But we can also be our own saviors. Through the active expression of our genuine nature, and the steady efforts to master our minds and move our lives forward, we can finally, after all this time, experience the freedom and joy that we deserve in life."

Chapter 19.4. - (...)

 "If we are not free to choose our character and conduct and legacy, then we are controlled by something else—thus we are lacking freedom. And if we are not responsible for our beliefs and behaviors, then someone or something else is—thus, again, we are slaves. And so the great demand is clear:

We must be conscious and responsiblefor our beliefs and behaviorsif we are ever to be free…"

Note: Jocko Willink, Brendon Burchard and Gary John Bishop… so this book which you are now reading… is nothing more than collection of thoughts.

"Yes, this work will be hard. So let us take stock of what lies ahead. This work will require that we finally declare who we are and what we want. It will require new levels of presence and power and ownership in the important roles we play in our lives. It will require us to upend our very days and, finally, reestablish personal control of our agenda. It will require the courage to defeat the internal demons that defy our greatness. It will require the willingness to advance with abandon beyond our own comfort zones. It will require new practices of joy and a greater sense of gratitude. It will require that we refuse to break our integrity when faced with hardship. It will require that we unleash love so that our soul can soar. It will require a rise to greatness so that we may serve and lead and leave our mark. And it will require that we sense time differently so that we might experience
each moment’s vastness and freedom. For each of these efforts we must set bold new declarations in our lives."

"To spend the full force of our energies advancing toward a Personal Freedom—the genuine life full of vibrancy and meaning—this shall be our aim. Let us marshal our motivations to align with such a high and worthy cause. Let us set new declarations and discipline in our life. Let the value of freedom ring through every crevice of our minds, through every thought and action we choose, through every relationship we influence, through the long days and long marches that lead to our highest selves and highest contributions, through all the hopeful dreams born from a liberated soul."

Chapter 19.5. - Fear Rip Us

 "FEAR RIPS US FROM FREEDOM. IT IS THE DESTROYER OF greatness. We know this, and we know we should tame our mind in order to defeat fear. Yet look at all the adults who act like powerless children and avoid the life they want because of fear. The socially oppressed say, “Well, you don’t understand. People are always holding me back, and I am afraid to chase my dreams because others will judge and reject me.” And the self-oppressed say, “You don’t understand. I can’t chase my dreams because I might fail—I might not be good enough.” These are the debilitating thoughts of the fearful. Should we wish to live a vibrant life, we must transcend such childishness and look fear in the eye, recognizing it as a mental construct that we alone fuel with small thoughts that betray our magnitude."

 

"They have not been restricted by social myth, and ego has yet to take control over their life. You must understand that your truth will never go away, and will always be there to correct you when you feel otherwise. It is also accessible for growth and learning; hence we can relate who we really are to any situation and any decision.I must ask you this question: Are you really being who you know you are? Nearly everyone I’ve asked has become defensive and answered with, “Of course I am.” In my own experience, most times we are acting how we think we have to, not the way we truly want to. We think about what others are thinking about us. What are they going to think when I do this? What are they looking at? What makes them laugh? How do I have to be to fit in? What can I do to impress them? We have thoughts like, “Oh my God, they are all looking at me, straighten up, no, don’t look down, look up, look cool,” and so on. We do this when we walk down the street, go for a run, visit the beach, or socialize. It’s usually a subconscious reaction because we have repeated it throughout our life. If you say that you don’t care about what others think or the effect they have on your life, that is an outright lie. If you didn’t care what others thought, you would be walking around the streets naked. And I know I’m not alone with drifting off at some points and wondering what my funeral would be like. Come on; tell me that hasn’t crossed your mind. What would people say about me? Would they cry? Would I be missed? How would they remember me?It’s human nature to care what other people think. It’s obvious that people are going to remember whatever legacy we leave behind. In order to leave a legacy we must be our legacy now. The greatest legacy we can live and leave behind is to be who we really are. Doing this allows your true destiny to be displayed. If you don’t know who you are, how can you make yourself happy? So are we being who we really are, or who we feel we have to be? It’s a fine line, but with a bit of thought you will be able to distinguish between the two. Finding this distinction allows progress to soar."

 

Note: Question Everything is what you need to remember

Chapter 19.6. - RelentLess

"The key to becoming relentless is to focus on the problem in front of you. Give it your full attention. Become someone who progresses even when all seems lost. The answer is always out there; all you need to do is find it.

Then you can move forward to your next obstacle. And you give that obstacle your full attention until it’s taken care of. Then there’s the next and the next and the next.

By doing this, you never have to wonder where you’re going. You’re not worried about how many miles you have left to walk. You become someone who loves obstacles rather than avoids them because obstacles are your keys to success and growth. You simply take one step at a time.

And if you come upon something that’s blocking your path, you find a way to get over it or get around it. Then you keep walking.

Relentlessness doesn’t mean charging into the fray headfirst, swinging and flailing your arms every which way. It’s focused, determined action. Again and again and again.

You’re not bashing your fist against a brick wall until it’s bloody and bruised. You’re using your hammer and chisel to slowly, methodically chip away piece by piece until eventually there’s a hole.

And then the hole gets bigger. And bigger. And before you know it, you’re like Alice stepping through the looking glass to a whole new world."

Chapter 20 - Resistance

"And the resistance doesn’t just come from other people; It comes from your own mind too. Both your conscious and subconscious thoughts can work against you to stop your dreams right in their tracks.

It could be outright negative – “That’s impossible. Why even try?” Or it could be subtler.

“Wouldn’t it be a lot better to just sleep in instead of getting an early jump on things at the office?” “That game on your phone is so much more fun than working.”

You could overcome these distractions and objections, of course, as we discussed in the last chapter. But there comes a point on your journey where you sometimes lose track of where you are. You become so locked up in the daily humdrum that you’ve completely wandered off the path and into the middle of the fucking jungle, and are now meandering around with no map, no water and no clue.

Are you going in the right direction? How long until you get there? How much more of this can you take? Maybe it’s over here. No wait, maybe it’s this way.

And when you inevitably stumble or encounter some sort of obstacle, you question the journey at all. Maybe it’s even time to turn back.

At this point, when you don’t know whether you’re up or down, how far you have to go or how far you’ve come, there’s only one thing that can keep you going.

That thing is relentlessness. The momentum to keep moving and moving and moving, no matter what happens.

It doesn’t matter if we’re “feeling it”, it doesn’t matter if we’re gripped by doubt and worry.

Here’s the deal, true relentlessness comes when the only thing you have left is relentlessness. When it seems all is lost and all hope and evidence for success has long since vanished, relentlessness is the fuel that drives you through."

Part 6

 Let's face it... let's go little further than any other book has ever went... 

Chapter 1 - School

 Let me tell you something..

Just let me tell you something

 

School is not helping kids... adults... even university. The truth is that we had cavemen problems long ago which were... bashing with a wood somebody and being high status... Trying to abuse.. Trying force somebody... like a woman to fuck. Nowadays these problems are over... they are

 

 

 

 

 

FUCKING OVER

NOBODY REALLY HAVE THIS PROBLEMS

 

 

 

 

Mainly because there were humans right there .... at the right moment... and started creating social groups.... to be more accurate... they started to punish the bad people... but one moment they realised that they are high status
.. and PLENY of the people they know... are getting into that level... and long time... long time... School and universities were created.. .

 

 

 

And NOWADAYS this is the bench... which creates a big differences of the guy who walks out and is homeless and the rich folks.

 

School... university... such places fuck self-image
.. self-CONFIDENCE.. . It crEstes procrastination and one moment you got in your pocket a whole book of bad Habbits... it's a fucking long list... teachers fuck you over... you get one of those negative people in your social circle of life and one moment you see that your parents aren't far from this line...

 

CHEERFULL.
. HAPPY KID

19 Years old... thinks about killing himself

 

 

(IF THE STORY WAS A JOKE... IT WOULD BE GREAT... BUT IT'S NOT... IT'S REALITY... THE MORE COMPLEX WE SEE IT... THE MORE COMPLEX IT BECOME...)

Chapter 2 - Doubled

 It's kinda a double that What next I am going to say... it's kinda contradiction and it still doesn't make this book ready, you are not ready in finishing it.

 

 

 

In this world there are reality shows, comedy shows, TV Shows and books and famous people and articles and gazillion ton of information. (Clearing the bullshit)
If you are betting on playing data game... the game in which you are lazy... you don't doo much activities and don't have any social skills... you ain't gonna win this game.

 

 

 

 

By now I am procrastinating in WRITTING this book... It's procrastination... I could have call a friend or even made a call to a person who I don't care so much... and what?
What?

 

I am here typing data like a angry monkey... school system is ruining ton of minds...

 

 

"NO HAPPINESS
NO FUN
NO LAUGH
NO SMILE"

 

And now "you" "I" and pleny of other people are out there and just don't know what to do... how to do it... when to do it... why to do it...

The problem is each action by itself is procrastination.

Note

Stop for a minute and let's not this out... you started a book soon enough you gonna finish it. You are more than a average human...

 

 

 

FUCK YOUR FRIENDS
FUCK YOUR PARENTS
FUCK YOUR DOG
CAT AND

 

 

 

 

EVERY OTHER MEDIOCRE

 

mindset... what this whole thing was all about was about the people who put you down... be rude about it... life is not long you don't want around yourself baggage full of shit... full of procrastination... anxiety... negativity... depression... ecauses and all this BULLSHIT. It's time to cut up to the chase distance from mediocre build up circles... go with new mindsets and lastly... don't go to harsh on yourself ... it's the root of all evil.

Chapter 3 - Distraction and Worries

 "“It’s this simple, in order to improve your internal world, you have to start by taking action in the external world. Get out of your mind, and get out into your life.”"

"There’s a time for thinking and developing your mind. But ultimately, you’ve got to step up to the plate and put what you to know into action.

All of your assertions play into that. You are willing – to take action. And to embrace the uncertainty that comes along with it.

“I am relentless” doesn’t mean relentlessly thinking or watching TV. It means relentlessly doing. Relentlessly taking action, pursuing your goals, acting and failing and ultimately succeeding.

Nothing that I’ve shown you will make a single difference in your life, unless you act on it. You have to make the difference. Make it happen.

You have to claim your greatness. I’m not going to do it for you. Neither is your mother or your spouse or your neighbor. Confidence won’t save you, the future is not suddenly going to improve, your worry isn’t going to suddenly disappear and your new qualifications aren’t going to make you suddenly assertive or credible. Only you can take a stand for your potential.

Don’t just read this, think about it, and then go on about your life doing the same shit over and over. Apply it.

“I’ll do it later” – no, do it now.

“I’m not smart enough to do that” – cut it out. Stop honoring that shit and act.

Don’t let your mind control you any longer. Stop letting it hold you back with its excuses and distractions and worries."

Chapter 4 - Quit

 "Take stock of the things you want to achieve. What do you want to accomplish? What do you need to do to get there? Map out the next step – hold yourself accountable, moment by moment by moment to those steps.

 

These two steps, stopping and starting, are naturally linked. Because psychologically, it’s hard to just quit something “cold turkey”. Especially when it’s an addictive habit, that affects the very chemistry of our brains, like food or sex or drugs or video games.

Stopping your bad habit doesn’t help, unless you replace it with something else, something that actually works in your favor and is an example of the new kind of life you really want to live. It’s about systematically replacing the old with the new, forging a new life for yourself--the kind of life you’ve always wanted.

 

You have to clear out the bad to make room for the good. Otherwise you’re not going to have enough evidence for that new life. You’re building a case for a new life, item by item. The process has to be thorough and decisive or you’ll always be held back and slowed down on your journey to change, carrying that dead weight.

 

Quit the TV, the sea of self-help books that you read and do nothing with, excessive eating, sofa camping and procrastination. Replace them with tango classes, book clubs, eating for fuel, bicycle riding and expressing yourself…ANYTHING!"

Chapter 5 - Excuses With Promises of Nothing

 "We’re constantly buying ourselves off. We have all kinds of things we tell ourselves about why we “can’t”.

I can’t, I can’t, I can’t. But you can. These are all just excuses. You promise yourself all kinds of new actions, you put them off with a litany of reasons and end up within nothing more than a growing relationship to yourself as a bullshitter!

You’re way more likely to sell out on yourself than anyone else!

The only difference between you and the person who’s living the life you want is that they’re doing it. They’ve built that life, and they’re living it.

 

They’re not smarter, more mindful, stronger, or any of that stuff. They don’t have anything you don’t. The only difference is that successful people don’t wait. They’re not waiting for the “right” moment. They don’t wait for inspiration to strike or for some cosmic event to force them to action. They get up and they do, and they try, and they fail even before they may feel “ready.” They’re flying the airplane while they’re building it. If it falls out of the sky, they’ll piece it back together and try again."

 

"“If I take death into my life, acknowledge it, and face it squarely, I will free myself from the anxiety of death and the pettiness of life – and only then will I be free to become myself.”

- Martin Heidegger

 

One day, you’re going to die. You’re going to stop breathing, become still, and cease to exist. You will exit this physical plain. Whether it’s tomorrow or twenty years from now, it’s going to happen.

 

We’re all mortal. There’s no escaping it. You might find discomfort in these words or resist the notion of your demise but if it’s truth you’re after, that’s the one truth you just cannot argue with. You are going to die.

Imagine that you’re on your death bed. You hear the beep... beep... beep of the monitor nearby. Your health is critical, and you’ve only got a few hours to live. You can feel your heartbeat and energy slide.

 

As you lie there, you start to look back on your life. You never made the change you wanted. You stayed stuck in that same job, that same relationship, that same overweight body until now, the day you die.

You read books, but you never applied them. You planned diets, but you never followed them. You told yourself what you were going to do, psyched yourself up a thousand times, but you never did it. You started dozens if not hundreds of life changing escapades and then wilted.

 

As you lie there in your hospital bed, loved ones cycling in and out over the course of the day, what do you feel?

Regret? Remorse? Sorrow? What would you give if you could go back to this moment—the one in which you’re reading this book—and do things differently? If only…."

Chapter 6 - Make It Happen

 "Each of them plays into a theme. You may not immediately see it, but it’s there.

If you want your life to be different, you have to make it happen. All of the thinking or meditating or planning or anti-anxiety medication in the world isn’t going to improve your life if you’re not willing to go out and take action and make changes. You can’t sit around waiting for the right mood to strike to for life to play out the way you want it to. Nor can you rely on positive thinking alone to transform things for the better. You have to go out and do.

 

One of the ironic things about developing our mind and our mindset is that it can actually keep us from acting on the things we really need to act on. You can become a personal development drone. You know tons of cool shit but it’s made little or no difference to the trajectory of your life.

 

We think, “As soon as I get rid of my worry or discomfort, I’ll start dating again”. Or, “When I find the root of my procrastination or when I find something to motivate me, I’ll be completely unleashed and happy”. The desire to work on our “procrastination” just leaves us stuck in the cycle of procrastination/not procrastination and keeps us even further from forwarding our actual lives.

We’re waiting on that moment or experience when everything in our mind is just perfect. Our thoughts are clear, our emotions our positive, and our anxiety or worry has completely disappeared.

 

When we feel “off”, we put our lives off. That’s right, you’re waiting on a feeling.

Life doesn’t work like that. There is no perfect mood. And while you’re waiting on it to improve and miraculously make your life better eh, guess what? Your life isn’t getting any better! None of these assertions are going to make your life easy. Hell, for a while, it’s more than likely to make your life harder! Nor is it enough to simply internalize them. You need to act on them.

It’s this simple, in order to improve your internal world, you have to start by taking action in the external world. Get out of your mind, and get out into your life."

Chapter 7 - Extreme Upset

 "None of this means you can’t plan, or that I’m telling you to walk through life aimlessly without direction

or goals.

But when you make a plan, what do you have to gain from being welded to the expectations inherent in it? Nothing. When you are free from its expectations you are “in a dance” with life where you can simply execute the plan, and deal with what happens.

If it succeeds, you can celebrate. If it fails, you can re-calibrate.

Don’t expect victory or defeat. Plan for victory, learn from defeat. The expectation of people loving you or respecting you or a pointless exercise too. Be free to love them the way they are and be loved the way that they love you. Free yourself from the burden and melodrama of expectation, let the chips fall where they may.

 

Love the life you have, not the one you expected to have.

“I expect nothing and accept everything.” This simple personal assertion gets you out of your head and powerfully into your life, out of your thoughts and into your reality. Problems, barriers, disagreements and disappointments are all part of every human beings’ life.

Your job is to not get caught up in that crap, to stay out of the swamp of mediocrity and drama, to reach for your greatest self, your greatest potential and to challenge yourself to live that life every single day of it.

Your life, your success, your happiness, really is in your own hands. The power to change, the power to let go, be adventurous and embrace your potential all lies within your reach. Remember, no one can save you, no one can shift you, all of that is your responsibility and what better time to embrace that change than now?"

 

"Instead of silently expecting something and feeling slighted when it doesn’t happen, let go of that expectation. If there’s something you want, how about asking for it with no expectation? And when you do something positive or generous, do it because you genuinely want to rather than loading in the added weight of what you expect in return.

That game of tit for tat only hurts you both in the long run.

 

If it’s something serious that consistently challenges the relationship, confront the other party about it. Don’t expect them to realize how you feel or, by the same token, expect them to be able to change how you feel. They can’t. Only you can do that.

People are always going to lie, steal, cheat, and everything else one can imagine. It’s just not connected to reality to live in the expectation that they somehow won’t and then throw a hissy fit when they do it anyway. Remember, in those cases, you always end up worse off than they do! Much worse!

 

You end up sticking yourself with resentment, regret, anger or frustration. Remember, they’re not doing that to you, you’re doing that part to yourself! You really can accept things for what they are. It doesn’t mean you condone them or that you won’t decisively change them, this is about becoming masterful with your mind and your emotional state. It’s about quieting the mind and allowing yourself to act with power in the situations of your life rather than succumbing to your internal and external upsets."

Chapter 8 - Bothering

 "The next time you catch yourself getting brought down by your expectations, shift things in a different direction. Instead of getting your knickers in a twist about how things didn’t turn out the way you wanted or expected them to, simply accept them for what they are. In that moment you are now freed up to deal with them.

“This is appropriate.” When you’re having growing pains at your new job, take a step back and realize how appropriate that really is. Of course a new job is going to take some getting used to, whether it’s the tasks you’re performing or the people you work with. It’s therefore entirely appropriate to make a few mistakes or tread carefully as you try to get to know your new colleagues. The expectations dissolve right there, immediately.

If your relationship is struggling, change your perspective and get the whole picture. What are your expectations?

Many of us expect our partners to be a certain way consistently, or to anticipate our needs and know exactly what we’re feeling, as if by magic. But your partner, like you, is an imperfect human with his or her own set of complicated emotions and thoughts. So it’s appropriate that they may sometimes be distracted or get short with you after a bad day."

 

Note: The problem as far as it appears is that by giving meaning to things which are out of our zone… it creates concern by itself stress, anxiety. This so far sounds as bad as hell… more likely typical depression… THE PERFECT TIP WHICH YOU CAN GET IS STOP BOTHERING AROUND THINGS WHICH ARE NEGATIVE, OUT OF YOUR PATH…. OUT OF BEING STATE OF CONFIDENCE…"

 

 

Chapter 9 - It's Wrong

 The problems with such paths is suicide, homicide… killing others… depression, anxiety… and the moron thing about the whole thing is that is pure swallowing air and wanting food to be made with main ingredients air.

STOP, STOP, STOP… Putting yourself on pedestal.… it's wrong!

 

 

 

 

 

 

Chapter 10 - How To Stop Self-Monitoring

 "How To Stop Self-Monitoring

1. First you have to realize when you are self-monitoring. You have to
“catch yourself in the act.” This can be hard at first. When you realize you are
self-monitoring, you then have to...

 

2. Switch your focus. Your attention never stops. It canʼt be shut off or
lowered, only directed. One of the most important things you can do to
overcome your SA is to focus your attention in a way that will serve you
instead of holding you back.

 

In a social situation, if you think about all the things you are doing wrong,
and are focused on not embarrassing yourself, you will end up “playing it
safe.” You might say as little as possible and when you do speak, youʼll be
self- conscious and itʼll come across weird. But if your focus is on getting to
know others and sharing laughs with them, you will fit right in and people will
accept you into the group. If you are totally immersed in a conversation so that
all you are thinking about is what is being discussed, then the words will come
automatically and spontaneously. Again, this is a simple shift of focus.

If you are just walking by yourself and feeling self-conscious, you can still
switch your focus to something else. Think about being on the beach. Count
to one hundred. Observe and become fascinated in the environment around
you. Think of something that will take you mind completely off what you're
doing physically.

 

3. Stop talking to yourself. If you're constantly doing this in your head,
stop. Shy people often talk to themselves to avoid talking to other people.

Switch your focus using the technique I just showed you. When you quiet your
mind and put your focus on the situation in front of you, you will find yourself
becoming much more likely to say something.

4. Donʼt think before you act. Donʼt wonder in advance of what you are
“going to say.” The worst thing is when you rehearse what you are going to
say in your head before you say it. Very social people just get a general gutfeeling
of wanting to say something, and they open their mouths and say it.
Donʼt plan - act first, then correct your actions as you go along.

 

5. Don't hesitate. When a thought pops into your head, express it within 2
seconds. The longer you wait the worse your fear of expressing it badly
becomes. You build it up too much in your mind. The solution is to downplay.
You could be in a war zone right now. Instead, you're just talking to someone.
Being spontaneous is a muscle, the more you use it the easier it becomes to
rely on it.

 

6. Donʼt criticize your actions. After you do something, do not analyze
how well it went. Hereʼs how a typical inhibited person acts: after he has
gotten up enough courage to say something, he immediately says to himself,
“Maybe I shouldnʼt have said that. Maybe the other person will take it the

wrong way.” Stop being so self-critical. Your criticism is unnecessary because
when you make a mistake in a social situation, your mind learns the lesson
and automatically adjusts your future behaviour.

 

Itʼs the same as learning to ride a bicycle. If you fall, your brain gets
feedback from the experience. Over time, you learn how to keep your balance
and not make the same mistakes again. Learning social skills works the same
way. You may start out awkward and weird, but your brain continually learns
from your experiences and improves your behaviour automatically based on
the feedback you get from interacting with other people. So stop tearing
yourself apart. Useful and beneficial feedback works subconsciously,
spontaneously, and automatically. Constantly second-guessing yourself on a
daily basis is defeating."

Chapter 11 - Over think and Excuses

 Note: Overthinking... Less exposure to outside world….less standards in life… seeing life in negative way.

THAT'S WHAT RUINS US

IT'S JUST TIME TO SAY:

 

"I am okay…"

 

NO MORE
NO MORE
NO MORE

EXCUSES

ACTION
ACTION
ACTION
ACTION

 

EXCUSES

 

Are the things who stops us getting healthy relationship, getting and expressing us… making more friends. Being confident… getting proper frame and even it starts with 1-2 ends with 1000 and you feel guilty.

Chapter 11.2. - List Of Excuses

 "Not Enough
Gonna Get Arrested
Not Now
Tomorrow
Later
After
Okay… I promise… tomorrow
Let's focus on something else
She is too hot
She is ugly
She is not my type
I am not in the state
She seems too busy
I got enough done for today
After few minutes
When I start preparing getting ready
People are going to hate me
She is not going to like me
She is going to get mad
She is going to get angry
She seems like she is having a serious discussion
Not Now.. . Tomorrow with somebody else
Not alone… not now
Not Now.. . I am with him
She is black
She is playing on her phone
She is talking to a friend
She is talking on the phone
She is looking down
She is going to feel not uncomfortable
When I get off
When time gets
Let's re-think it
Now I am gonna chill out… tomorrow
Fuck it…Tomorrow"

Chapter 11.3. - Self-Monitor (Part 2)

"Self-Monitoring Causes Self-Consciousness and Inhibition
Letʼs think about what self-monitoring actually is. This will help you figure out
a way to stop it. Self-monitoring when you're trying to consciously control actions
and behaviours that are normally unconscious. What does that mean?

Most of the time your breathing is an unconscious behaviour. You are not
conscious of it because your body takes care of it without you having to do
anything about it. But if you started to make yourself breathe differently, you have
now made breathing into a conscious behaviour. Now you have your focus on it.
Itʼs like the difference between letting an airplane run on autopilot versus taking
control of it using the steering wheel.

So the point is, you self-monitor when try to take control of behaviours that
should happen on their own because you are afraid of the impression youʼre
making.

Do you control how you move your mouth when you talk? Do you
consciously control how you're breathing? Do you think about how your arms and
legs move as you walk or sit down? Do you worry about what position your arms
are in? Maybe you aren't doing it now, but in tough social situations you do it.
I often get people who ask me things like “How can I walk/speak more
naturally?” The problem is, they are usually looking for some tip they can use to
force their walk to be more natural. What they donʼt realize is that the fact they
94
are even thinking about this is whatʼs causing the problem to begin with!"

"1. You Hesitate
Instead of just letting go and expressing yourself, you think and think and
think. And when you finally do something, it feels unnatural. It's not fun for you
and it's not fun for other people. The more you hesitate before doing something,
the more contrived and phony it will seem when you finally do.
For example, if you think of something to say, and them wonder if you
should say it, you get nervous. It stops becoming something that just popped into
your head and becomes YOUR own idea. You put more and more importance on
how people will react to it the longer you wait. When you finally do say it, you're
nervous. You spend too much time and attention controlling how your act, and it
comes out unnatural.

2. You Seem Out Of Focus

When you Self-Monitor, you seem out of focus. Like you're actually 10
seconds in the past or 10 seconds in the future, instead of being in the NOW and
enjoying it.
Only shy people and those who are extremely self-conscious monitor what
they do. Normal people don't. What normal people do, is not think at all before
they act. They don't think about what they're going to say next. They get a
general feeling of what they want to communicate, and they say it.
92
Often when I tell this to people with SA, they feel confused. If they donʼt
know what they are going to do before they do it, then couldnʼt they start spewing
nonsense and repelling everyone? And is it really a good idea to become one of
those loud, obnoxious people who say everything without thinking first?
Once you learn how to stop self-monitoring, I guarantee youʼll change your
mind. Youʼll find that letting go of needing to tightly control everything you
communicate will actually make you communicate better. It will be like youʼve
been driving your whole life with brakes on socially, and just now you discovered
how to release your brakes.
Think back to one of your best experiences socially. Chances are, it felt like
the right words were somehow coming out of your mouth automatically. You
weren't stuck in your head, trying to come up with something to say. It was all
flowing, and you felt in the moment and connected to the other person. Best of
all, you were having fun.

3. You Seem Inauthentic
Oh, the irony. You want people to like you and think you're a swell guy or
girl, but they don't. They think you're inauthentic.
When you think about everything you say and do, it doesn't come from you
directly. It's been filtered by your brain, and people can feel it. They can sense
the slight off-ness when you've been thinking of a remark for a minute. They don't
feel the same energy coming from you as from a person who comes up with
something to say on the spot, and that lack of energy turns them off.
Basically, any time you are trying to create some sort of impression on
people, you are sabotaging yourself. Only someone needy and desperate for
93
approval would be trying so hard to make others perceive him well. On the other
hand, if you donʼt really care about the particular impression you make on
someone, it shows that you are secure in yourself because you donʼt require
other people to approve of you."

 

"“I expect nothing and accept everything.”"

"Our mind has all kinds of automatic thought processes that we don’t even know are going on. Expectations are just one of them, albeit an important one.

Here’s the harsh truth about how our brain works.

We all like to believe in something called “free will”. It’s one of those concepts that really speaks to who we are as human beings. I mean, let’s be honest, if we don’t have free will, what in the hell do we have?

We value the notion that we freely choose what we do, and when to do it. We want to feel that we control our own fate and shape our own destiny.

But when our minds are ruled by these automatic thought processes, do we really have free will? Many would argue that we don’t. Listen, here’s how much free will you have – stop doing all that shit you know you shouldn’t be doing and start doing all the shit you know you should be doing. All of it.

This free will stuff isn’t so easy now is it!?

 

Because, as we’ve talked about throughout this book, even when you feel yourself making a conscious decision, there are a series of unconscious thought processes that are driving that choice. Things you don’t even see or acknowledge.

People are much more irrational and illogical than we realize. In many cases, our subconscious is the puppet master that truly pulls the strings.

Fortunately, you can take back your freedom to choose. And that’s by understanding how your mind works, seeing what it’s doing as it does it, and being able to use that information to cognitively choose something else. To make conscious that which is currently unconscious.

Expectations are just one of these things."

"I’m not talking about the usual kind of everyday expectations you’re aware of. It’s also not like we’re literally saying to ourselves, “I expect this” or “I expected that” in a conscious way. It’s something that’s happening just below the surface, where you’ll only see it if you take the time to look closely.

No, I’m talking about the ugly, undermining, hidden and treacherous expectations that dwell in the wings and under the stage of your Broadway blockbuster. The kind of expectations you didn’t even know you had until they came out of nowhere and blindsided you and sucked the air from your lungs.

When you and I take on a life-changing project, we prepare for it from what we know. That includes items from our own experience, what we’ve read, heard and imagined. We start to picture it in our minds. We research, we ask others for their opinions, and consume reams of information. We begin to assemble an idea of what this will look like and how we’re going to get there. That image in our heads becomes the template from which we work and plan."

"This isn’t what you signed up for, is it? Maybe this whole thing was a mistake. You’re starting to feel a little darker and more depressed while you start to confront the gut-churning possibility that you might lose all that investment and wind up having to crawl back to your old boss to ask if you can return to your old job.

 

WHOOOAAAAA!!!!!

 

Easy tiger! Before we get ahead of ourselves, let’s take a step back."

"“Stop doing all that shit you know you shouldn’t be doing and start doing all the shit you know you should be doing.”"

Chapter 12 - Condition of Fear

 

"THE SOCIAL CONDITIONING OF FEAR

Why are some people more driven by fear than freedom?
It can only be because in the past they were conditioned to be fearful, either by those around them or by their poor application of mental faculties. There is no genetic curse or personality trait that permanently condemns one person to fear more than another—even a genetic predisposition for anxiety can ultimately be flipped on or off by mental conditioning. We are not slave to our history; we can be freed by our conscious thoughts and disciplined habits.

Let us begin with understanding how fear is socially conditioned. Fearful people tend to be shaped by past interactions. They were pushed and molded into being timid, weak, and afraid by the critical parents, bullying peers, or small-minded teachers and bosses. The people around them were always cautioning or

harming them, and so they became habituated to the impulse of fear—it came up so often they got used to it. From a fearful past they have generated a fear-driven present.

This is not to blame our past or excuse our fears. When people choose fear as an adult, they are choosing not to manage or overcome it. This is difficult work for many because fear has become their default impulse. The thoughts ruling their minds and their self-talk replay the cutting barbs of the critics and misguided caretakers who once demeaned them. The good news is we can change this conditioning. When we awaken to responsibility, we realize that nothing can be done about our past but to see it from a new perspective. We can release ourselves from its grip. We cannot control how others treated us yesterday, so let us work instead on understanding how we are currently dealing with those who stoke our fear today. The great efforts to move our lives forward always come down to a new moment when we interrupt our fear and activate our freedom by choosing how to feel, interpret, and direct our lives.

Part of the mastery of life comes from anticipating that the same kinds of characters that sought to instill fear yesterday shall be met again today or tomorrow. Knowing this, we become wary of people who chip away at our freedom. These are the worriers, weaklings, and, in rare cases, the wicked."

"If you are thinking of something that may happen in the future, like what
youʼre gonna say, then stop that as well. It kills your spontaneity and delivery.
Donʼt pre-plan what you are going to say. You have to start trusting that what you
are going to say will come to you naturally when, and only when, you need it. All
you need to do is to keep your focus in the present moment as it unfolds.
How do you do this? Practice mindfulness as I explained above. Practice
being very alert and aware, but not thinking. Observe your thoughts instead of
being controlled by them. Widen the gaps between your thoughts. This is the way
to become incredibly responsive in social situations."

"Presence Is Not Thought Suppression

One of the comments I often get when I teach this is: “So youʼre basically
saying to suppress my anxious thoughts?” The answer is no. Thought
suppression is not something I teach.

In order to stop thinking and become present, you should not try to suppress
or fight your thoughts. In fact, you should do quite the opposite. Allow your
thoughts to wander wherever they like. All you must do is become the observer of
your thoughts. Watch your train of thoughts as it passes by, but do not try to stop,
control, judge or interpret them in any way whatsoever. Simply observe.
This practice of observing your thoughts in a detached manner will naturally
lead to gaps in between your thoughts. The gaps will happen naturally, do not try
to force them. Just pay attention.

Hereʼs your homework assignment: Follow the instructions on
mindfulness and being present in this chapter. Sit down for 20 minutes a day
across from a blank wall, set up a timer so you do not constantly need to check
the time, and observe your stream of thoughts. Review this chapter regularly to
make sure you are practicing correctly. Once you get the hang of being present
by yourself, start to become more and more present in every area of your life.
Learn to do it when you are hesitant about facing an anxiety-provoking situation.
108"

 

"The Worriers

The worriers around us today are often the biggest threat to enflaming our fear. They are the most likely to steal our motivation and destiny because they often seem to be our friends. We are so close to them that their anxiety can bleed onto us. We must learn to control our reactions around them

Most worriers are not unkind people. They have no clue of the fear they impose on our lives, or the way their incessant voices of doubt oppress our potential. They don’t see that they cause treachery by arguing for us to play it safe. It’s the loving mother who says, “Careful, honey,” at every turn as her child goes about the normal activities of childhood; the coworker who gives ten reasons why we might get in trouble and not a single word about how we might change the world; the lover who incessantly fears we as a couple are going to fail and keeps imploring us to back down from a fight or from the edge of any risk.
These people believe they are thoughtful, loving, and protective. Their cautious words are most often delivered from a loving place. They want good for us. They feel a duty to protect us from hurt, and so they try to direct us toward the well-worn paths that they understand. These are our parents, friends, peers, lovers, neighbors, and leaders

It’s an awkward social reality: We must protect ourselves from being limited by those who care for us as much as by those who blatantly oppose us.
What can be done? We must learn to hear doubt, worry, and anxiety with great acuity, and we must not integrate other people’s fears into our own decision making. Developing this kind of acuity is easy for the conscious person, since almost all worriers use the same language and arguments—they favor cautioned reason as their shield of choice in “protecting” us. Their matter-of-fact tones and phrases all sound the same:

 

“Be careful; you might get hurt.”
“Be careful; you don’t know what could happen.”
“Be careful; they might fire you, forget you, reject you, hate you, spurn you, despise you, pick on you.

“Are you sure you want to do that?”
“You wouldn’t like that.”
“That’s not who you are.”
“You can’t do this.”
“That’s not really your thing.”

 

Have we not heard all this before? Surely we all know someone adept at crafting eloquent arguments for why we mustn’t be too loud, too crazy, too intent on pursuing our passion or taking too many leaps into the unknown. These are the calm and convincing ones in our lives—those who present clear-eyed explanations about how we could be hurt, embarrassed, or exhausted if we take risks or try to be different, creative, alive, bold.

These people are clearly not callous. They believe they are doing their duty. They seem motherly and judicious, working with great care to protect us. But let us beware the saboteur of dreams cloaked in the goodwilled friend. How many souls have failed to soar because they were suffocated in a loved one’s worry?

If we are not vigilant, being around constant worry can quickly limit who we are and what we might be capable of. What can we do, then, with our caring families and friends who unintentionally limit our vision or striving?
We should be generous in our interpretations of their concern, as they are likely unaware of their insidious effect, which is to teach us to at first consider risk or harm before all else. We must harbor no ill feelings toward these worriers; they deserve patience and understanding because they may be trapped in a mindset that favors aversion over ascension. Let them be governed by fear if they must, but do not join them.

All we can do is listen intently to those we trust, and be sober in our estimates of any real danger. But to those who we do not know, and who do not know us, to those who want us to stay put in their bubble of belief about who we are and how far we can go in life, we must close our minds. We must forgive their small thinking and we must look beyond it to see a vaster horizon for ourselves. We must not worry what could go wrong but rather wonder what magnificence could enter our lives when we are consistently expressing our genuine selves and pursuing our true passions.

Let us obsess about freedom, not fear.
And so a deep line must be cut into the sand: There can be no tolerance for worriers in life. All great men and women come to this same determined conclusion. No matter how kindhearted the deliverer, we cannot give prolonged consideration to those who repeatedly instill fear in us. It demotivates and demoralizes.

When our dreams become vivid and enliven us, we must venture forth, with or without worried family and friends, even if it brings some sorrow and sacrifice. To allow other people’s anxieties to defeat our drive is to succumb to oppression."

"The Weaklings

The next category of people we must anticipate are the weak and slothful, those who speak out against the efforts and hardships required to be remarkable.

 

 

It would be too simple to say, “Do not give your ear to a lazy person, as he will surely pour fear and apathy into your soul.” But it is nonetheless a powerful mantra. Choosing not to listen to weaklings demands true personal power, especially for those of us who are good listeners and empathetic friends, as we want to respect their opinions and circumstances. We must be discerning with those we know well and allow close; it is

possible to listen lovingly while being careful about what energy we absorb.
With strangers, it makes sense to be guarded: it is easy to be seduced by bon vivants and those who promise lazy afternoons of eating, drinking, gossiping, or watching tasteless reality. We can be fooled by their leisurely pace, mistaking their lack of ambition for serenity. But these kinds of people can be more apathetic than relaxed. We must beware them, for they can make us fear the thing that advances our lives: effort.
“Take it easy,” they say. “Why work so hard? Nothing you do is going to last or mean anything or make a difference anyway.”
It’s as though on our ambitious journey, these people wave toward us on the sidelines with a smile, yet they whisper to others that our toils are a waste of time. They make like watchmen, warning us with great glee against oncoming struggles.…"

 

 

 

"…I did this because I thought I found comfort in doing it. In a way, I did for that brief moment; but that was only because it made me think the world, as I’d come to know it, was still intact. Along with the fear of going into the unknown, I also hadn’t come to the understanding that the world only seemed the way it did because I had made it that way. I didn’t allow myself to see the truth until I went through a deep process of questioning. I began to ask myself, Does taking drugs really make me happy? I would answer with, Maybe. It was still not a stable answer, so I asked again. If it makes me happy for a couple of hours, but I hate the rest of the week, is that really happiness? No.Then another one: Is taking drugs stopping me from getting what I really want out of life? I want to achieve, I want a great relationship, and I want to be healthy, so yes, it’s preventing me from ever getting those things…"

 

 

 

 

"You must remain strong throughout the process, and you can do this by weighing up your answers (your new beliefs), compared with the old lies. It even reaches a point where you should be so disgusted with your old ways that it turns into good frustration.Physically scream at yourself in the mirror if you feel the urge. I would personally repeat again and again, “That life is destroying you, you’re not going back under any circumstances, do you understand? Yes.” Then I would repeat, “You’re living a better life, you’re living a better life,” and so forth. Something I highly recommend if you find yourself battling the old habit. Say it with as much power as you can, so it feels like you just got a baseball bat and hit those old beliefs out of the park. Also, feel free to tell people about your change. I remember the day I stopped smoking I went and told as many people as I possibly could. I made myself feel extreme pleasure and pride every time I did. I knew that if I began the habit again, everyone would consider me weak, but more important, I would consider myself weak. I reinforced the belief that if I started smoking again I would not be successful in life, and every time it came to mind I began to imagine the chemicals eating away at my body. As a result, the thought would make me nearly physically throw up. It sounds extreme, but when you think of the extreme effects smoking has on your health, it sounds like a pretty good substitute. The question is: How much do you want change?If I told you that you could change the direction of your life so that it would be more fulfilling right now, would you? If the answer is yes, then you acknowledge that there are areas of your life that you feel you are personally destroying. No one really wants to destroy their own life. Even though they might be doing just that doesn’t mean it’s what they want…"

 

 

"The more that people are motivated to be successful and achieve the goals set for them, the more their confidence in their own abilities will grow as well, which can, in turn, make them even more motivated.
But you can also work on your own confidence and motivation in the workplace in order to achieve your goals and intentions. When people are confident and motivated at work, there are many positive factors that result in the workplace:

• Job satisfaction improves
• Effort increases
• Working environment improves
• Results are the focus
• Drive is created
• Everyone’s full potential can be tapped
• Everyone is certain of the role they are to fulfill"

Chapter 13 - Confidence

 "1.2 PERSONAL CONFIDENCE 

 

We all know people who are confident. They seem to face life’s obstacles with a level of calm that is enviable. They get into action to respond to a problem before giving themselves time to dwell or worry too much. Confident people are more successful at work because they have a belief in their own abilities to the point that they feel comfortable handling whatever comes at them. Make a presentation to the board? No problem – the confident
person plans and executes the presentation without allowing fear to stop them. When someone is confident, they:

• Focus on their strengths while managing their weaknesses
• Aren’t afraid to take risks
• Enjoy challenging themselves and setting high goals
• Seek out self-improvement opportunities
• Aren’t afraid to admit when they make a mistake."

 

 

"We mustn’t take these loiterers on the sidelines for friends. These people will inspire nothing but weakness, and their invitations to a life of ease are lures to a life of indolence. Their ease is not what we are after. For what good is a life without struggle? What can be learned? How else do we grow? What mastery can there be without real effort, real sweat, real toil, real thunder?

Yes, we should meet with caution the apathetic and unambitious, those too weak to fight or try or endure. They have forfeited their freedom. They don’t have the resolve to pursue their highest selves or any meaningful purpose. And so they are not examples for us"

"We must remember that most cynics and judgmental tyrants who seek to oppress us are small, frustrated people who take the heat off their own apathy and failure by labeling us as narcissistic strivers or undeserving fakes. They try to belittle us to stop feeling so little themselves. These are those who hide behind a computer or powerful position and exert their uninformed opinion on us so that they feel better about themselves. Should they be asked about their own contributions, they generally fall silent or lash out in incoherent and meaningless diatribes. Theirs is a sad fate, where their only sense of success is to point out our failures; to elevate themselves they must demean us. Their jabs are sad demonstrations that nothing is easier for small minds than to discount great ones. For those who dwell in Ignorance, everyone from out of town is suspect."

 

"Beware those too apathetic to strive for important things as they ultimately instill indifference, swaying so many independent people from their path of greatness. And so let us stay on our path. Let us choose the strenuous life, taking pride and finding honor in our struggles and our contributions. We will not fear the exhaustion and anxieties that magnificent dreams and unceasing hard work can bring. We will keep a joyous heart even as we toil, for our toils bring us toward that which we find meaningful. Let us humbly pass by the watchers and the aimless, the bored and the bellyaching. They have nothing to offer but distraction and useless comment."

 

 

 

 

 

Chapter 14 - Society Is So Afflicted

 "A society so afflicted by ease and conformity always flinches at the arrival of those boldly seeking Personal Freedom. As we express our true selves and advance toward our dreams, we will meet unfathomable, unending resistance. Those who play a zero-sum game of life—who believe they cannot succeed if we do—may launch slings and arrows of envy. Or they might seek, with soft and duplicitous words, to lull us back into the fold. Those at our sides may stab us with doubts about our readiness or warn that the world is too hostile a place. And those in front of us, fearful of losing their place, may hurl wicked accusations and build walls to keep us back. We must ready ourselves and be wary of the effect such tyrants can have in making us feel fearful in life."

 

"We must be especially vigilant in our reactions to contemptuous, small-minded people who fight for overt and oppressive power over others: the brute who towers over others, using his physical presence to intimidate, the greedy liar at work who seeks to wreck us, the abusive lover, the vicious neighborhood gossip, the condescending bullies and the sweet-talking con artists. While we mustn’t let these few tar the goodwill of the majority, we are wise not to deny their existence This sort of extreme tyrant has a vast terrain of ego to defend. They can be narcissistic, paranoid, angry people. Their commonality is that they are on constant search for those seeking their level of success. They want to wreck them. Their goal is to oppress our will and energy so that they can feel better about themselves. Consciously or unconsciously, they see our advance as a threat to their power or a sign of their weakness. And so if they can minimize us, they can minimize their loss of stature.

We see this sort of tyrant often at the helm of struggling countries, protecting interests with a fearful hand, enslaving people and ostracizing dissidents. We see them in the corridors of commercial success, lording over their underlings, wielding harsh criticism or rumor, denying the advancement of the deserving. They are often family members, battering the very ones who depend on them. All their taunts and threats and terrors function to make us fear for our safety, security, or prosperity so that we might fall in line with their demands."

"Of all their ways to hurt us, belittling our worth is the tyrant’s most vicious weapon. “You are unworthy, stupid, inadequate, unskilled,” they tell us. Their harsh words and actions seek to box us into their concept of who we are and where we belong. The effect? We start to fear that we are not good enough or cannot win, and tragically this can quickly become a self-fulfilling prophesy. We can come to believe we are as small as they tell us we are, and we can choose to stay in their pathetic boundaries of belief rather than roam freely into our own freedom.
We should not be surprised when others demean or resist our initiatives. Nor should we suppress our will and let them win. We mustn’t let the wicked stoke our doubts into the mighty flames of fear that consume our dreams.
To these tyrants, we owe nothing."

Chapter 15 - Opressive Person

"A truly oppressive person cannot see beyond his or her own self-interest and so no relationship with them will ever be joyful or reciprocal. They are blinded by their ego and live in a world by themselves and for themselves. Do not grovel to these people. Do not try to placate them. Do not hope they will change. Do not engage with them or hang about with them. Do not let them provoke anger. Never sink to their level. We must never tolerate a tyrant’s efforts to hold us back. We mustn’t let them govern our potential. Every display of submission, deference, meekness, and compromise they see from the desperate or feeble among us gives them a perverse joy, and their power grows. And every time we back down from them or minimize ourselves, we become more fearful and weak.

 

So let us be diligent in avoiding these people, without ever deviating from our own path."

 

"THE MENTAL PROJECTION OF FEAR

While many people in our lives might seek to stoke our doubts and fears, the vast majority will seek to support us. More will seek to pull us up than push us down. People know that in allowing us to chase our dreams unencumbered, they are silently giving themselves permission to pursue their own. No matter how many bores and bastards we meet in life, we must remember that we have friends all around, and we mustn’t hesitate to ask for their help, inspiration, and wisdom.

The hard truth of life is that though our fear is often socially cued and conditioned, it is more often a result of dereliction of our own minds. We misuse our mental faculties by barely using them at all. We have the means to extinguish our fears, but we lack discipline in using it, like having the extinguisher in our hands as our home burns but choosing not to use it because we’d have to aim. How often do we sense worry but, rather than combatting it with conscious thought, let it burn? How often do we so obsess on negative things that they grow into a great scorching fire of anxiety? For many people, this has happened unchecked so often and for so long that they are no longer aware of the fact that predictable thought patterns—all of which they can anticipate and control and transform—are causing them to be fearful."

Chapter 16 - Cultivate Fear

 "Let us learn now, once and for all, to anticipate how our minds cultivate fear. Just as we can expect the worriers, weaklings, and wicked to derail us if we are not cautious, we can prepare for how our minds will tear us from happiness and progress.

Most of the fear we feel in life is simply anxiety arising from our anticipation of two kinds of pain that change might bring: the pain associated with loss or hardship.

The first type, loss pain, is a thought pattern in which we worry that we will lose something we cherish if we take any given action. If we fear changing jobs, it is because we don’t want to lose our compensation, our friendships with certain coworkers, our corner office. This thought pattern plays out in millions of subtle decisions throughout people’s lives. We think, “If I go on a new diet, I’m afraid I’ll lose the joy I feel in eating my favorite foods.” “If I quit smoking, I’ll lose that 20 minutes of peace I get by going outside and taking long drags, so I’m afraid to quit.” “If I leave the jerk, I’m afraid I’ll lose love in my life and never find anyone else to be with.”

The only way to combat this thought pattern is to analyze it closely, then reverse it. Once we sense that we are anticipating loss, we must question whether or not it is true.
The more we look for evidence of our fears, the more we realize they are often faulty, quick assumptions of a tired or undirected mind."

 

 

"This reframing requires intelligence—and optimism. Once we question the assumptions causing us anxiety, we should explore the opposite of our worries, focusing as obsessively as possible on what might be gained if we changed. What if we begin the new diet and find new foods and recipes we love? What if we quit smoking and learn new practices that give us even more relaxation?

What if, in a new romantic relationship, we finally find joy? We should certainly visualize these outcomes as much as we visualize dark scenes of loss. Dream up and focus on the positive, for it is much more useful than the long nightmares of negativity.

The second thought pattern that causes us to fear change is related to the anticipation of hardship. We’re scared to do something because we think it will be too hard on us. We worry we’re not capable, worthy, or ready, and we allow that worry to stop us. But isn’t this a pathetic use of mental powers? Isn’t it true that with enough time, effort, and dedication we can learn most of what we need to succeed? Isn’t it true that most great accomplishments were achieved by people who at first had no idea what they were doing, who had to first endure years of struggle to bring their dream to fruition? Let’s not forget that we didn’t always know how to ride a bike or use a computer or make love, but we figured it out. Humans did not know how to land on the moon, but we decided it was a worthwhile endeavor, and so we struggled for a decade to puzzle it out. We became capable of the impossible. Thus is the story of the individual and the entire species."

Chapter 17 - Overcoming Fear

 "“I’m thrilled to look for someone who is more right for me than my last relationship, to find real love, to enjoy life with my soul mate.” Let us fire our enthusiasm knowing that the learning journey toward freedom can be exciting. We must trust this: We can learn and we can grow and we must begin now for destiny favors the bold.

 

To some, this sounds like mere positive thinking. And what of it? Shall we continue thinking negatively? What good will come from focusing on all the loss and hardship we might experience in life? There is no self-awareness in letting fear reign because of our own mental sloth. We have the personal power to wield our thoughts more forcefully in the daily fight against our fears. Our thoughts will free us or destroy us. Maturity comes in understanding that it is our choice alone to move toward freedom."

 

"Let us reawaken to a life unbounded, finding inspiration in the fact that humans throughout the millennia have learned to overcome their fears. They changed how they reacted to fearful impulses. They took a deep breath, contemplated whether or not their fears were rational, and visualized the growth they would experience by moving forward. They took those steps forward again and again until they found that their fear was no longer so powerful or even present. This is called self-mastery. Let us learn from them and put these practices into our own lives. Let us choose to master our minds and demonstrate more power over our fears.

As mature and bold adults, we can refuse to shrink from those things that might cause us anxiety or hardship. We can reach toward what is always pulsing in the background, that equally powerful impulse, that sure and solid will toward Personal Freedom. We repeat over and over: “I won’t let others stoke fear in my heart. I choose to remain true to who I am and where my dreams direct me no matter the hardship I might incur. I remember it always: Fear wins or Freedom wins, and I choose Freedom."

 

"psychology. One demands engagement with our true self and ambitions, and inevitably leads to independence, growth, happiness, and transcendence. The other causes us to skirt around challenges, avoiding struggle as much as possible—despite struggle often being the very thing required for growth. This path leads to weakness, conformity, and, frequently, regret. Through the pursuit of Personal Freedom, we discover our destiny; through fear, we look at our demise.

Our reasons for tapping into these motives are often called our motivation. We can feel motivated to move forward or to halt, to grow or to shrink, to settle or to chase greatness. The actions we take in life are often based on whether our internal logic and impulses lean toward fear or freedom. If we lack compelling reasons to take action, or if our impulses are fearful or protective, then we tend to stay put. But if we have a strong list of reasons to move forward and we’ve conditioned our impulses to support freedom, we are more likely to consistently advance our lives.

With freedom on the line, we would expect that most of us would understand how motivation works in our lives. But many remain clueless, reacting to each day of life without reason or power. Thus they are not free—they are slaves to impulse. And that is why we have so many people trapped in aimlessness, apathy, and fear. Motivation remains a mystery to the masses.

Yet the first virtue of the great among us is a remarkable level of sustained motivation. Success and fulfillment in life rests on the unflagging ability to get up, to be ourselves, to chase our dreams with fire each day, to keep willing ourselves to the next level of presence and performance and potential. More broadly, our entire human value system rests on motivation. None of the great human values that keep us and society in check—kindness, love, honesty, fairness, unity, tolerance, respect, responsibility—would flourish if we were not motivated to bring them to life. And so if we fail to master our motivation at an individual level, we cannot be happy; if we fail to maintain our motives for goodness at a societal level, all would be lost.

What great heights could we reach if we truly activated our human motivation? Imagine how the world would change, almost immediately, if its citizens could turn on their motivation whenever desired, for as long as desired. Would more people become free and happy? Would we have the stamina to end poverty? Would we build more schools? Might we end famine, eliminate dis-ease, free those wrongly imprisoned, stop global warming, and achieve remarkable progress in every corner of the globe? Would billions more see their dreams come true?

How different our society could be if true motivation ran deep, if all that apathy and aimlessness drifted away and our people were fired by a conscious mind and a consistently committed heart? Imagine how the world would prosper. Imagine the freedom.
This is a reachable possibility because motivation is stunningly simple to figure out and act upon. And so let us begin that path by demystifying why we do what we do."

 

Impressum

Tag der Veröffentlichung: 20.12.2018

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