BookRix

Finally out on sale after being edited thrice! I hope you all like it!

Will you be able to do any editing to this before it's available to purchase? Because - and please don't be angry with me for this - if I spent money on this story and then tried to read it with all the mistakes you have, I'd be upset and want a refund. New writers get so excited about the idea of being published, that they don't take the time to learn how to write well. Your blurb alone would make me hesitate to buy this. The phrase, "how it feels like" is terrible grammar, and should simply be "how it feels." Also people live "on" an island, not "in" an island, unless they live underground. And you need a comma between "forever" and "please read..." You see, the blurb is the first thing we read, and if something that short and simple has that many mistakes, the potential reader will assume (and correctly) that the book itself is badly-written.

I don't want to discourage you, and in fact, this is meant to do the opposite. You have a nice story, but before you rush off and publish it, take the time to learn the rules of grammar, and how sentences should be formatted. And read a few books on writing, which will explain to you the difference between "showing" and "telling," and why that matters.

I started writing books when I was in the fifth grade, and thought I was doing a great job; my writing style was based on all the books I'd read, but I'd never really studied why those books were considered great reading, why they'd won writing awards, or why so many were considered classics. It wasn't until after I'd published my first book and gotten some hefty criticism about it that I began to realize that maybe telling a good story wasn't enough.

I've been where you are, which is the only reason I feel I can say anything like this. The more experienced writers on BookRix helped me a great deal, and over the years, I've learned what works and what doesn't, among other things. For instance, you have a random chapter with nothing but song lyrics that doesn't seem to have anything whatsoever to do with the story. You have to remember that even if you know why it was put there, the rest of us, who can't read your mind, have no clue, and its presence as the second chapter is just...weird.

Anyway, there's lots of great info about writing in the groups "Serious Writers" and "Better Writers," for instance. And don't just ask your friends for comments, because many of them will just tell you it's "awesome" because they're your friends, while others will have even less understanding of grammar and spelling than you, and not see any of the mistakes. That doesn't help you at all.

Romance is a genre that will always be popular, so if you want to see yourself as someone considered a favorite writer of romantic stories, you first have to take the time and make the effort to learn all you can about being a good writer. Then, all those great ideas I know you have, all that wonderful creativity I could see in even the short sample, will be told in a way that everyone will, well, fall in love with.